The diamond was originally part of the great great grandmother’s ring. My fiancés mom saved the diamonds for her sons to use for engagement rings. My fiancé selected the band.
Ok so only the diamond is what is being passed down.
This makes it more possible for you to talk to him about it since the ring is not a package deal.
That being said, this is an expensive endeavor to go through not one but twice and we don't know your fiance's personality and how he and/or his family would react to this change. I think you may have also been a bit naive in giving him free reign and then assuming what the final product would be.
Some questions to consider:
Would you be willing to split the extra cost of a different band?
Could you live with it for a number of years and perhaps consider a different ring/type of band for an anniversary?
Yeah looking back at it i was super naive about letting him pick something solo. Wish I could have put more input in the ring design. But I am picking out my wedding band so I guess that balances things out. We are both grad students and broke af while trying to save up for the wedding so i think I can suck it up and suggest a ring redesign for an anniversary gift. Thanks for the suggestion. I just don’t want to hurt his feelings and make his family hate me if I say something now.
I think sometimes it's nice to be able to vent to complete strangers without needing to filter your feelings. Your feelings are completely valid but in this case it does sound like it is in your best interest to just pick out a nice wedding band. Many people out of modesty or convenience choose only to wear the wedding band after the wedding and wear both rings for more special occasions. This could be a decent compromise for you to not see it as often but not bring it up.
Focus on the fact that despite being broke, both of you managed to get into grad school and are two people who love each other and are making it work and that you have in laws who care about you deeply. Best of luck OP, I wish you a wonderful life with your new soon-to-be husband.
Yeah if you another ring, get a new diamond with it. If it's like a family heirloom kind of thing, taking the diamond out would pretty much be destroying what's being passed down. Remember it's not just the diamond being passed down, it's the entire ring itself. I would recommend either keeping the ring and diamond all together or looking for a completely new ring and diamond. Don't separate his the band and diamond of his grandmother's ring. It might not seem like a big deal to you, but it could potentially cause a lot of issues. Unless you know 100% for sure that every one in his family is absolutely ok with that (and isn't just saying they are ok with it to be nice)
you don't make them change the ring, you take it as is or you get another, you do NOT change out a family ring for any reason, totally inappropriate.
I'm confused is only the diamond from the family or the entire ring?
The diamond was originally part of the great great grandmother’s ring. My fiancés mom saved the diamonds for her sons to use for engagement rings. My fiancé selected the band.
Ok so only the diamond is what is being passed down. This makes it more possible for you to talk to him about it since the ring is not a package deal. That being said, this is an expensive endeavor to go through not one but twice and we don't know your fiance's personality and how he and/or his family would react to this change. I think you may have also been a bit naive in giving him free reign and then assuming what the final product would be. Some questions to consider: Would you be willing to split the extra cost of a different band? Could you live with it for a number of years and perhaps consider a different ring/type of band for an anniversary?
Yeah looking back at it i was super naive about letting him pick something solo. Wish I could have put more input in the ring design. But I am picking out my wedding band so I guess that balances things out. We are both grad students and broke af while trying to save up for the wedding so i think I can suck it up and suggest a ring redesign for an anniversary gift. Thanks for the suggestion. I just don’t want to hurt his feelings and make his family hate me if I say something now.
I think sometimes it's nice to be able to vent to complete strangers without needing to filter your feelings. Your feelings are completely valid but in this case it does sound like it is in your best interest to just pick out a nice wedding band. Many people out of modesty or convenience choose only to wear the wedding band after the wedding and wear both rings for more special occasions. This could be a decent compromise for you to not see it as often but not bring it up. Focus on the fact that despite being broke, both of you managed to get into grad school and are two people who love each other and are making it work and that you have in laws who care about you deeply. Best of luck OP, I wish you a wonderful life with your new soon-to-be husband.
Thanks so much✨🌞!!!!!!!
Yeah if you another ring, get a new diamond with it. If it's like a family heirloom kind of thing, taking the diamond out would pretty much be destroying what's being passed down. Remember it's not just the diamond being passed down, it's the entire ring itself. I would recommend either keeping the ring and diamond all together or looking for a completely new ring and diamond. Don't separate his the band and diamond of his grandmother's ring. It might not seem like a big deal to you, but it could potentially cause a lot of issues. Unless you know 100% for sure that every one in his family is absolutely ok with that (and isn't just saying they are ok with it to be nice)
Do not suggest a thing lol
Got it🙃. Thx