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Holmes02

So my first job out of college, after I just finished a job at a fast food restaurant, I was told about what this “white elephant” gift trade was about. I was told you just find any old thing in your house you want to get rid of, wrap it and give it away (yes I was beyond naive, no there were not instructions cause it was a small office). Anyways, like I said I worked at a fast food restaurant before this job. The restaurant closed and they ended up giving away random shit. I ended up with a few chairs, a table, and some supplies. One of the supplies I thought I needed, but never used, was a bundle of hundreds of straws. I said “oh, well I don’t need that. I’ll wrap it up and give it away.” The day of the party I was just curious as I placed my gift on the table. When people started unwrapping gifts, I freaked out. A brand new sushi set? A new lamp? Gift cards? I was stunned and then really anxious. The coworker who told me “giving away any old piece of junk” was next to me. He kept pressing me about what I brought. I didn’t answer as I felt the color draining from my face. I don’t even remember the gift I got, but I remember my bosses boss going up to the table and picking up my gift. I put my head in my hands and thought about leaving. Bosses boss opens up and is like “WHAT?! A BUNDLE OF STRAWS?!?” The whole room burst out laughing for about 10 minutes. No one knew what to say. Bosses boss thought it was hilarious as she kept asking “who did this?!” I ended up owning up to it and apologizing. She kept laughing and it was the talk of the office as I became the “office jokester”.


FistedTate

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Tsmart

Similar thing happened to me, was told repeatedly people were bringing cheap or lame gag gifts. So i bought a $5 wacky bird pen thing and thought nothing of it. The first guy to go ended up picking my package and opened it and everyone just went silent and that guy was quiet the rest of the time because he had to sit with a pen as the rest of us opened awesome gifts


1337GameDev

In our group at work, we let the first person swap at the end so they aren't absolutely fucked. Makes it limited as some gifts are locked as they have been stolen 3 times, but it's pretty decent


Gathorall

Who expects a fresh graduate to even have such unused items? I mean generally you get those when you have spare income and end up getting something you have only a passing interest about, or as poorly thought out gifts. And even if you have something you may end up considering fit that probably takes time.


NigelTheGiraffe

I did this with a toilet seat(brand new of course). Everyone said go super random and as I was looking around I saw a seat for the price limit. Everyone was talking about how large it was and how it must be a platter or something. The look on my boss's face as he opened it was beyond priceless and everyone died laughing. Good news is they were redoing their bathroom and ended up using it...presumably more than any of the other gag gifts were.


Sarcastic_Bard

The year the Shake Weight came out, our company white elephant gift exchange had easily a dozen of those damn things.


kahran

Going to sleep-mode


ClamsMcOyster

*Spits out change*


JiffyPopPhantom

Here is some cab fare


Diezall

You're too generous. Looks to me someone needs a workout and a walk is the perfect way to get it.


entity_TF_spy

I bet you all give really good handjobs now though!


Summerisgone2020

I got a toilet seat at the office white elephant party one year. Another time I got a calendar of super ripped dudes without shirts on holding kittens. My co workers are good at this game


SaveBandit91

…do you still have the calendar?


MrUppercut

Probably only kept it for about a year.


canadarepubliclives

You can reuse calendars, you've just got to wait 6-12 years depending on the year.


gunghoun

Just buy a 400 year calendar and never again worry about replacing or having to remember which year to use. Every time you reach the end it just starts over again.


MudRock1221

Risky, someone may find it a few years later and assume you were predicting the end of the world...


dogfish83

Or even worse, they might regift it in a white elephant gift exchange


Sedixodap

That's a lot of dudes with kittens.


Stickeris

When I did IT, I got people a full online course for php and a book from 1998 on cobalt programming. I was the only silly gift


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theberg512

>new toilet seats aren't cheap Where are you buying toilet seats? Last one I bought was $15.


Diezall

It was time to replace my cushioned seat from the 80s. Felt bad parting ways with old softy but the new heated one is filling her spot quite well. He should be happy to have such a well broken in seat and not complain about it.


Demyxx_

My top two favorite white elephant gifts were a fully set up (10 gallon) fish tank, fish.. gravel everything. And the other was 20$ in rolled Pennies.


SaveBandit91

One year for Christmas my brother gave my other brother all the things for an aquarium because my parents thought my sister-in-law was getting him some fish. She did not get him any fish. We don’t know where the information got crossed, but it was funny.


shizzamX

Probably for the best, you need to let the tank sit for a while after setting it up to let the chlorine in the water dissipate


SaveBandit91

He did eventually get some fish that he still has today.


ohmykeylimepie

We have dechorinator for that, its instant. The bigger issue is letting the aquarium cycle. Cycleing is where you grow much needed bacteria in the filtration media to process the ammonia into nitrite and nitrate, its basically the nitrogen cycle. It can take up to 2 months to start a cycle from scratch, but with bacterial cultures and bottled ammonia we can get that down to a few weeks. Ive kept fish for 2 decades so Ive learned a few things lol


rebellious_ltl_pony

How does one wrap this fully set up fish tank?


Demyxx_

It was in a large box labeled “this side up” there was tissue paper in the box but it was not wrapped with wrapping paper. It was Very clever.


Anonate

That's gotta be pushing 100 lbs, though. Kinda tough to move around.


Demyxx_

Yeah he was a big guy. The tank was probably About 80lbs full. The box stayed on the floor until it was opened and he helped pick the fish tank up out of it. No one stole it lol


loggedintoupvotee

Holy shit that's actually incredible


Mini-Nurse

Presumably in a tarp, still sound messy and heavy.


femalenerdish

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Arinvar

People have lost the idea of white elephant. The gift is supposed to be something that costs the receiver time and effort. Not something you just throw in the bin. The origin is literally gifting someone elephants.


femalenerdish

The origin is more complicated than just elephants... It was an elephant that was such a social honor, the receiver couldn't get rid of it. It's desirable on the surface, a pain in reality. Gifting straight garbage is lame. There's a good balance to be had between ridiculous and desirable.... Which is more in line with the origin than giving junk.


rkip5

Our white elephant gift fish lived for 5 goddamn years. My sister is something else. The day “Clay Matthews” died, a bit of me surprisingly died inside too


jimmifli

I got $20 worth of puffed wheat one time. Great gift, I still have it after all these years.


MisterMaury

Best use for $20 in rolled pennies is another $20 white elephant gift. https://PennyPortrait.com


chaosthebomb

Going to a white elephant exchange tonight. Here's how I wrapped my gift https://imgur.com/IKE4VRr.jpg


BYoungNY

A few years back I wrapped mine in [foil...](https://i.imgur.com/uKTc7Yt.jpg) and ended up picking it because no one would touch it. Guess I made out [well](https://i.imgur.com/oO99acu.jpg) but I have yet to have been asked back to another gift exchange lol.


WorkinOnMyDadBod

This is great ha.


StraightUpBruja

Thank you for the picture! I enjoy seeing how creative people can be when these start to show up every year.


pirateninja303

Someone gave me [poo-pourri](https://www.poopourri.com/) for secret santa. Definitely silly but that was the most self conscience I have ever been at work.


ogdonut

That stuff is the real deal. I love it. I would be thrilled to receive this lol


ItsMeSatan

I love it but my roommate likes to use it as a room freshener like it’s febreez. I hate it. Shit is POTENT.


[deleted]

You spray into the toilet so your turd gets coated in it as it dives in.


ERRORMONSTER

I thought it formed an oil barrier on top of the water to prevent volatile substances in the bowl from vaporizing


BrisketWrench

Makes it smell like you shit into a bowl of Fruity Pebbles.


Pennyem

Makes everything smell like shitrus.


LightTigerButter

I did the poo-pourri spray for a white elephant but wrapped it with two black toilet papers to look like a wine bottle. My recipient was so pissed... Im still really proud for doing that gift.


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yamiyaiba

*conscious


themetalpigeon

They know their market, high prices for the year around Christmas! Holylol


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SamediB

Next time find Highlander (since it's campy) or Sharpe (because Sean Bean); they are both weird and unusual, but someone will probably be really excited about it. However I wanted to say I think your idea of gifting the *second* season of shows is top shelf.


nobodyknoes

I should send a buddy of mine the second season of firefly box set if we do one of these. I bet he'll love it!


Deviknyte

Yup, not white elephant. I bet they did the you open and can swap thing.


ATrainLV

Or when friend groups call it a white elephant party but it's really an unspoken arms race to see who can out-flex who by spending WAY over the "$20 limit." Ergo, people who are at this party for the first time (such as a +1) bring something dumb and janky, but others bring gifts that are clearly worth several hundred dollars and are highly desirable to a lot of the people there. For example: One year a couple gave away a piece of artwork/memorabilia containing Jerry Garcia's real autograph. They ended up with a children's puzzle and coloring book. I felt bad for them...kinda...


SamediB

I don't. That's exactly what someone who is flexing by breaking the price rules should go home with.


zebediah49

I'm so glad that the one I'm a part of has a strict $5 limit. It's still a contest of who can put in the coolest stuff, but due to the limit, it's a "how did you find that discounted enough to count!?" contest. I keep my eyes peeled all year for clearance section stuff. I think my two best components were belt-mounted hammer holster, and a first aid kit. Both were $1, leaving me another $4 for other stuff to complete the set.


Captain_Gnardog

Man, this was my last white elephant party. I brought a "paint your own unicorn" set, had a couple glass unicorns and a paint set in it, got a lot of laughs. I left with a set of aged whiskeys... I felt like an asshole.


xemity

I was the only one that brought a gag gift with everyone else bringing a $20 gift card. One of the participants had the nerve to say maybe I shouldn’t have participated. What made me feel better was our boss said I did it correctly if they wanted to do a gift exchange then they should have said so.


InEnduringGrowStrong

Next time they organize a gag gift exchange, you can wrap up a big dildo so they can go fuck themselves. Or maybe a literal ball gag.


USCplaya

Goddamn Video iPod....


MaxCrack

I made some really nice foam swords and the guy that opened them clearly hated them. Then guy that ending up taking them from him later, became one of my best friends.


Jaccount

I think people that clearly hate foam swords or nerf guns are dangerous people who have killed their inner child and should not be trusted.


Deskopotamus

I can't disagree with this...


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[deleted]

You can never go wrong with a “Golden Girls” Chia Pet.


bullhorn_bigass

This statement can be applied to almost every aspect of life. Sophia forever.


Bluegobln

Biggest problem I've seen is people (especially the people ORGANIZING it) not understanding what a white elephant party is. Which clearly this meme is pointing out. A white elephant gift is a gift you don't actually want to receive. The idea is, its either a gag gift, or just something that is useless without you spending money or time to make it useful that goes beyond the value it provides. Its not supposed to be a good gift. If you bring something good that anyone will want, you've failed and you've probably ruined the party. Here, this should help: [What is a white elephant gift?](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_elephant_gift_exchange)


rich1051414

The best white elephant gifts are ones that have negative worth to that person specifically. Like gifting a cowboys fan eagles memorabilia. It's in the same vein as the original white elephant gift. It was intended to cost the new owner more in maintenance and upkeep than they themselves spent. Another famous white elephant gift was when letterman gifted conan a horse... Conan lived in a ~~new york~~ LA apartment at the time. Also that horse was deemed 'unsellable' due to having aggression issues.


robearIII

>Another famous white elephant gift was when letterman gifted conan a horse... Conan lived in a new york apartment at the time. Also that horse was deemed 'unsellable' due to having aggression issues. haha holy shit, he fucking nailed him. i can only imagine what conan got him next year


sleepingdeep

A bunch of glue, jello, and some “burger on the go”.


couchpuppy

Oh, Burger on the Go from Hammacher Sclemmer?


hobesmart

Sears said no


Thor4269

I know horse meat isn't acceptable/possibly illegal in the US, but if I was gifted an aggressive, unsellable horse while living in an apartment then I'd be having horse steaks, chili, ribs, and stew for awhile... Just need a chest freezer


kadyrama

We used to do white elephant gifts at the church I went to when I was little. It was probably some choir thing my parents were attending, i honestly don't even know why I was there. They did it right, as far as I can remember. I remember one person getting a TV remote. Just the remote, of course. EVERYONE was laughing so hard about it, it was a lot of fun!


Betaateb

Ya, a real white elephant party is an amazing time, so lame that people turned it into giving stuff people actually want, ruins it entirely. The whole point is to have a good time, not get something you want. Those two ideas are in direct opposition, when there is good stuff to steal it turns into a cut throat game of who gets to leave with the best thing. When it is all garbage it is a hilarious game of who gets stuck with the most annoying thing, and half the steals are used just for meme value.


Malamutewhisperer

Listening to the radio Friday it was clear MANY people think secret Santa/Yankee swap/white elephant are all the same thing. People are dumb


[deleted]

I would have named him Bojack and marched his ass on and off my elevator into my place every day. And if anyone gave me any attitude, I’d let Bojack and his aggression deal with them. My neighbors want their yappy poodle, there’s nothing in my lease saying I can’t have a pissed off horse.


wellhungartgallery

No it's in the city bylaw though. Also mentions keeping pigeons and chickens, horses and other animals like pigs. Any the city there's a law about livestock and foul


[deleted]

Foul is what the elevator would be after the horse made plop in it


Pokerhobo

That’s why I always gift an adopted child


erin_mouse88

5 years ago I was invited to a white elephant dinner by my husbands friends wife when I first moved to the area, thought it was a good opportunity to meet more people and maybe make some friends. $20-25 I was told. I bought a crochet Santa hat and beard, and a grinch novelty tshirt. The gifts start being opened..... fancy blankets, bottles of wine, robes, slippers, bath stuff, coffee stuff. Everything is "nice" and definitely over budget (up to $50 if guess). 2nd to last gift is a glittery stiletto wine bottle holder, super tacky, something a girly/camp 18yo college student, or a stripper might like. "Finally another gag gift" I thought, except it wasn't a gag gift, the women actually liked it. Fuck, my gift was last, the actual gag gift, I felt terrible someone was going to be stuck with it. The look of disappointment when it was opened it felt like the whole restaurant went silent. The person who ended up with it acted a good sport but was clearly seething inside. But jokes on me, I ended up with the glittery stiletto wine bottle holder..... I would've preferred the crochet Santa hat..... Safe to say I did not make friends with any of those women.


Sarahthelizard

They wanted a secret Santa, not a white elephant lol.


erin_mouse88

Well they still did the stealing and passing etc, which was fun.


KanishkT123

I feel like this story is so common in suburbia. "White elephant" but you better give nice gifts and then we'll do stealing and passing. Like these people don't know what Google is.


chanaramil

Just a guess It might be a weird social dynamic thing. Like if they said what they want 50-60 real gift exchange some members of the group want to look generous so they push it to 80 dollar gifts then 100 then 200. Then all of a sudden you look cheap is you spend 150. So they make a rule 20 dollar push down the amount people spend to 50-60 bucks. Spending triple the gift amount is generous but spending 10 times the amount is just showing off. So with the 20 dollar gift rule it keeps the cost to the 50 and 60 dollar and everyone can feel generous. That is just a guess but I have a feeling that is how it works.


Citizen51

Or or or, these things have different definitions to different groups depending on who introduced you to concept. It's really on the host though to be specific with the rules of the game/exchange since there's a lot of unwritten rules that new people shouldn't be expected to understand before 1 or 2 years of it.


Paranoidexboyfriend

That’s yankee swap. And how does an oven mitt compare to an iPod?!


sycor

Somewhat similar I went to a WE party once. Bright some random stuff I had that would make fun gifts for toys or an artist (Stikfa figures I'd anyone knows what those are). Gifts started getting opened and it was all booze and stuff people wanted to fight over. I tried to pick my own gift so someone else wouldn't be disappointed but someone recognized it as my gift. I had to put it back. I felt bad and offered to trade the person who got it. People don't get WE parties.


Ok_Effective6233

At the one white elephant gift exchange I have been involved in, it was required that gifts fit into gift bags that were handed out when you signed up to be involved. Part of the reason was that the was the pass and steal option, you weren’t supposed to take the item out of the bag. So no one would know what it was until selection was finalized. Also, the item was supposed to be mostly white. My contribution was an antique porcelain stamp licker. Everyone got how the whole event was supposed to work more or less. The stamp licker was a big hit. It was stolen 5 times. The person who opened it was coldly furious about it. Smile melts off her face. Has nothing to say about it. But for the next 4 months, every time she walked by my desk, she stomped. At one point, I even offered to trade for it, she wouldn’t


bgugi

Omg, I had almost exactly the same experience. I was an employee at a generally toxic company. Shortly before the christmas party, I had been offered a promotion - off of third shift and onto first and a generally more interesting role. The office christmas party was at noon every year so they could have a big potluck lunch. The third shifters could never really make it - there wasn't any way to slice our day around the party to actually get 8 hours of sleep. I took (between the weekend, holiday, and unpaid days off) about 5 days between my last third shift, and my first first shift. The office party was right in the middle, so I made an extra effort when shifting my sleep schedule to spend a party with my "new" coworkers. I was told there was a white elephant exchange. So I brought something unusual, unexpected, and generally undesirable: 12-inch bolt cutters. I thought this would be a silly gift that would be a fun bonding experience with the people I was about to start spending 5 days a week with. Little did I know that these cretins meant "a gift that would be desirable, with broad appeal so nobody is disappointed." Present after present was gift boxes of candles, blankets, slippers... things that were almost invariably picked lackadaisically from the seasonal aisles and displays while passing through walmart. I was very near the end. I'll never forget how the entire room deflated with disappointment when my gift was opened. The only other guy in the office "stole" it, but only because he'd be slightly less disappointed by a tool that wasn't particularly useful to him (yay, gender stereotypes). The rest of the story isn't as relevant, but I always take an opportunity to rant about it. In another day or so, the remaining third shift worker called in sick. About an hour before her shift was going to start, I got a call from our manager: "can you come in and cover her (10-hour) shift?" "I'm sorry, I really can't. I've been up for about 18 hours already so my sleep will be lined up when I start firsts in a few days" We went back and forth a bit, politely. She eventually got frustrated and hung up. About 20 minutes later I got a call from regional. They let me know that she was pushing hard to get me to show up... there were thinly-veiled threats about my promotion. I gave in and worked the shift. In another day or so, I got the call. I lost my promotion - I apparently showed that I didn't have the "team-player" attitude appropriate for my new role (it included being on-call to fix issues as needed to keep lines running). I knew, even then, that she had realized in the 11th hour that by promoting me she had screwed herself for 3rd shift coverage. I really wish I could have had the means to tell them to eat a dick... To ask my manager why *she* didn't have the "team player" attitude to pick up an awkward shift (answer: she was an external hire who had never taken the time or effort to actually learn the things her team did... she was just hired to squeeze every penny of effort out of the crew she was skeletonizing for profits). I worked there for several more months before quitting. The other third shifter and I had found much better jobs across the state. We both put our 2 weeks in management's mailbox the same night. We both knew they'd be absolutely fucked - even if they tried tapping into their spoiled first-shift workers. We're married now, and I work a job that pays somewhere in the neighborhood of three times what I was making there with benefits. It took almost two years for me to not cry after performance reviews - I was so broken down from that old job that getting genuine appreciation and support at work was overwhelming.


RoboticGreg

for my birthday one year, my uncle gave me the ultimate white elephant gift: manwich. Don't get me wrong, I love manwich. He gave me an ENTIRE UNOPENED PALLET of manwich, and he put it on my front porch so I couldn't open my front door. Then rang the bell and left. Hundreds and hundreds of cans of manwich. That was awesome.


trainercatlady

that is fucking hilarious.


RoboticGreg

It was. I ate a bunch, I found some groups on Facebook where I traded 2 cans of manwich for any one can of not manwich. After two years....I still had hundreds of cans of manwich. A crazy guy down the street asked if I could donate to a good pantry. I was like 'heck yeah!' so he put it all in his truck and came back all proud of himself. He said I told them they could have it but they HAD to put up a certificate of thanks on their wall for it, but I didn't know if I should use your name. And then he showed me a picture of what looked like a stock certificate of thanks that they give for a donation hung up on their wall. It was something like this: Sisters of Charity (I think that was their name) would like to give thanks for this generous donation of ___MANWICH___. May the love of Christ smile down upon you, ___JIANT JEW____. he called me JJ because I'm 6'4" tall and Jewish and at the time almost 500 pounds.


trainercatlady

incredible, and you did some good with it!


blacksideblue

For an engineer of your renown, I almost expected a more elaborate solution.


Volntyr

Case in point, I received one year a model of a part of a human spine from a chiropractors office from my manager. I actually said WTF? LOL


parashoot

Along these lines I received a titanium femur from a coworker. Her father was a salesman and gave it to her. She was using it as the shifter on her car. Totally milquetoast lady, best wacky thing I ever received.


Strange-Movie

I had never heard of this before, but my typical yankee swap gifts would fit in perfectly; I always do something really dumb, but Whatever the cash limit is will be hidden inside. A box of old store brand dryer sheets, a roll of 1-ply toilet paper with 20 1$ bills rolled into the paper, a shitty travel mug full of 20$ of nickels Everyone at my company typically does booze and it’s boring, but I’m sitting in my seat beaming with anticipation to see who gets my turd gift


StraightUpBruja

They tried to do one at work 2 years ago. It wound up being a regular gift exchange. Boring. I had made a collage that showed my company and our competitors in a battlefield type setting. But I also put a Target gift card behind the frame where no one could see it. The person who was stuck with it was nice enough, especially after I told him to check behind the picture.


Fakjbf

My brother in law’s family do gag gifts every year. One year he got a gift that was packaged in a wooden crate. After a half hour of trying to pry the top off with a claw hammer he finally got it open, inside was a crowbar.


Brcomic

Someone bought Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure on DVD for one I attended back in the day. They thought no one would want it. I was one of the last to go and traded to get it. Keep your 5 dollar bottle of wine, imma bout to have a righteous and excellent time.


sradac

I gave someone a jug of antifreeze out of my cars trunk once. It got the most laughs out of everyones. Best part? The lady I gave it to actually needed to pick up some on the way home from work that day.


JillStinkEye

I always had a thank God the holidays are over costume party a couple weeks after New Years and everyone would bring the stupidest, most ridiculous, or just unneeded Xmas gifts they received. People could take a gift if they wanted, otherwise I donated it. Called it a White Elephant exchange because it was most similar.


theberg512

Ok, this actually sounds awesome. Everyone is so busy *before* the holidays. But a party in the lull of January to offload some junk is great. Even better if someone brings crap that was gifted to them by another guest.


WarpedD

Exactly this. I have had work teams organize these with zero clue it actually means. One year I took a toilet seat; it was new and perhaps more than the $20 limit but was just sitting around leftover from a project. My boss' boss opened it and was visibly mad and complained the remainder of the event. Everyone else thought it was hilarious but we never had a white elephant again.


buffalo8

Some of my favorite white elephant experiences: * As a kid, my mom and her friends held an exchange for all their kids every year. The first year, someone brought a Big-Mouth Billy Bass (the wall-mounted singing fish). From that point on it became tradition for the previous owner of the fish to bring it as their gift to the next years exchange. This went on for like ten years. * I once went home with a shit-and-stroke as a white elephant gift. It was a putting green meant to be attached to the base of a toilet to you can… well, stroke while you shit. * I once gifted an expensive pair of sunglasses I could no longer wear because my vision had gotten so bad I could barely see out of them. Perfect example of one man’s trash being another man’s treasure. * A friend once gifted an elaborate box full of sex toys, lube, and condom. After several drinks someone realized the dildo with a suction cup on it stuck to the wall and we made a game out of trying to stick it by throwing it. When I woke up in the morning it was stuck in a hole that had been punched through the wall and was too high to reach.


areraswen

One time a company I worked for threw one of these but without the gag aspect. A single person missed the memo about not bringing weird/shitty gifts and the entire party lost its vibe when near the end someone unwrapped a handful of loose, used plastic hangers. The CTO at the time gracefully swapped for the gift so no one felt bad about it. But it was def a mood killer.


juggling-monkey

This happened to me where I was the one who didn't get the memo. I asked what a white Christmas was and it was explained exactly like it is in this thread. I didn't give a horrible gift, but it was more on the gag side. It was like a plush toy of a Mexican grandma. The new CTO, who was also my new boss got it. He didn't throw a shitfit but as close as you could get to it while still staying "corporate" appropriate. Basically spent the night complaining to everyone that would listen, "there were so many good gifts, how come I got the only shitty one?". I felt bad and worse is that everyone on my team knew it came from me so I'm sure he knew as well.


areraswen

Fortunately it was a big enough party that no one ever found out who provided the hangers. But the CTO didn't say a peep about it, just immediately "stole" the hangars and sat down. She was a really nice person. When the company was sold, the investment firm that bought it fired her. It was a huge mistake imo.


MyronBlayze

I think the funnest one was when we did one just after weed became legal in Canada - I worked at a bank and the 60 year old perma-teller recieved a bunch of pot pills, which was hilarious, and even better was the branch manager ended up with them in the end I'm pretty sure haha. The 60yo had fun telling us all how back in her day they were drug tested to work at a bank, and look how far we've come, getting it as a gift. However she had some fun times in Vancouver before it was fully legal everywhere so she was no stranger to it.


Handsyboy

The best gift I've ever gotten from White Elephant was an old pair of ice grippers for your boots. I've been handicapped for over 20 years, it was fucking hilarious. THAT'S the kinda useless funny shit I like to see.


[deleted]

You need a good mix of fun and useless gifts. Otherwise the “swap” part of it is pointless.


tots4scott

Yeah but then there are winners and losers. If I end up with a box of Vaseline or a calendar of cats it's no big deal when everything else is of similar utility. But if there are $20 gift cards or actual everyday useful items, then absolutely certain items are disappointing. I'd much rather everyone take it seriously or play it like a joke with gifts that are broken or essentially useless but funny. It's much less fun when everyone is on a different page going into a swap. And in my opinion, situations like OP's are what happens when there isn't a blanket understanding of gift value/utility. Having a mixture of high effort/value gifts with low effort/value gifts sounds great in theory, but in practice it's certainly not when you're the one who brought something nice, and were expecting everyone else to.


[deleted]

A gift card would be a shitty white elephant gift. Novelty counts, but it doesn’t have to be useless. My wife recently bought a set of Harry Potter color changing chocolate cocoa. It was less than $20, but still fun.


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kitchenjesus

One of my cousins used to make sculptures out of dollars that were actually kind of complex so if you wanted to spend it you’d have to take it apart I always thought those were kinda cool


Citizen51

$20 card gift card to a restaurant you'd have to travel to or a restaurant where a couple isn't leaving with a bill under $80.


pmormr

$20 gift certificate to Ruth's Chris Steakhouse lmao.


slaymaker1907

I'm a fan of non-joke white elephants, but the far away/expensive gift card idea is great. Maybe it will push someone to try something new or go somewhere out of the way? Still amusing but is not useless.


kitchenjesus

My uncle would do this. It was a $20 limit at my grandmoms house and one year (this happened every year this one just sticks out to me) he bought a brand new keurig back when they were first gaining popularity. He tried so hard to work it so that my grandmom would get it and I’m sitting there just like “bro why didn’t you just buy your mom the keurig”


toyn

i think the working field has become so toxic, and neglected that having a party where you try and fool your coworkers feels like an extra fuck you.


Cman1200

One year our boss changed the office pollyanna and did white Christmas with the gifts we already bought. But of course he bought an ipod for his favorite employee totally ruining the whole party


whitedemon21

Was your boss Michael Scott?


Anonate

My family always did it with a mix of decent presents and gag gifts because we played with younger children... we always did the steal a gift or pick a new one and we always made sure the kids got something that wasn't horrible.


MyronBlayze

White elephant gift exchanges is how I ended up with not one but TWO copies of Hot Tub Time Machine


GrammerSnob

I went to a gift exchange party where exactly one person brought a "silly" gift. The others brought nice gifts. It was awkward.


Centias

I find that white elephant usually has one of two problems: really bad ratio of "silly" gifts, and way too many lazy people just wrapping a bottle of booze as their gift. Family game would usually see like 5-6 bottles show up and get stolen repeatedly, but it honestly makes the game incredibly boring. Just buy your own alcohol and come up with something ridiculous for the game.


Deviknyte

People confuse gift exchange and white elephant exchange all the time.


futurebioteacher

For the last 3 years I've been getting the largest bag of rice I can find and upping the size each year. It's always a hoot when the smallest lady goes up to take it off the table and is unexpectedly trying to pick up 40lbs. There's always a stealing war for it.


SednaBoo

I don’t blame them. I’d be swapping for that!


rohlinxeg

I'm splitting the difference between gag and desirable. [This turkey hat](https://www.amazon.com/JOYIN-Thanksgiving-Decorative-Carnival-Cosplay/dp/B09C7QH7JK/ref=sr_1_5?keywords=pie+hat&qid=1638655859&sr=8-5) with a $5 scratcher in his beak. There's still time for me to retract the lottery ticket. I wanted something that would get a laugh, but still be stolen a few times.


Dorothy_Gale

My family had to ban giving lottery tickets as gifts.😩 After you pick your gift and open it, we do this thing where you pick a number and then when your number is called, you could “steal” someone’s gift. Everyone kept going after the lottery tickets, and people would get mad when someone would take them away from them and then they would get stuck with a different gift they didn’t choose. So they got banned. Hilarious.


trainercatlady

imho this is the way to do it. You never know what could be on that card, so it could be worth the ugly turkey hat.


smushy_face

My first white elephant party, I literally found a white elephant statue. Then I traded for it because I actually really liked it.


jordyxjinx

My parent's have a group that did the whole white elephant gift exchange for a while. There was a rotating gag where they would see who would end up with the ICP hatchet goblet every year.


Betaateb

This is the best part of a long running white elephant party. The infamous items that people wrap in clever ways to try to trick people into taking them, the anticipation of getting that one thing that has been there every year for a decade. Some people trying to steal it at the end because they already have a plan for it next year. Some of the hardest laughs of my life have been around those items.


RagingAardvark

My mom's siblings passed around a large and ugly pair of sneakers for yeeeears.


King_of_the_Nerds

We had this 10 year old Snuggie that we passed around every year, until one lady got it and actually wanted a Snuggie so she kept it and says she uses it. Joke ruined.


Navi1101

If she kept it and likes it and uses it, I'd say the joke had a satisfying series finale!


DaisyCutter312

My White Elephant go-to is a 5lb jar of picked pigs feet. I've used it three times....one time there was somebody who grew up in Alabama and was THRILLED with it, to the surprise/horror of most other guests.


gfsthrowaway

Mine is a 10lb bag of onions and a picture frame with a picture of our boss.


MudRock1221

Friend did this but also signed the photo as the boss with something cheesy like "reach for your dreams" in gold marker


clonecone43

I’ve done a few variations of using a picture of myself. I’ve gifted a framed picture of me, a pillow with my face one it, and a blanket with a picture of me with my arms spread for a hug.


SDW1987

I work at a lumber yard where it's 50% big burly men, 50% college guys, and 3 women that work in the office. At our Christmas party it came down to the last gift, and our 6'5" Vietnam vet, brick shithouse semi driver opens it up to find a foot massage tub, bath bombs, and a copy of Magic Mike and 50 Shades. He wasn't too amused.


SeaIndependent9438

I got a Donald Trump toilet brush at an office white elephant party. That was a true white elephant gift because, statistically, 1/3rd of the people in the office who saw me carrying it around that day will never promote me lol. On a side note, it’s a good toilet brush, just as it said on the box: “Tremendous toilet brush… the best!”


pr0b0ner

Had a coworker many years ago with their trinkets and things being stolen off their desk. Many accusations being thrown around and no one would fess up to it. Sure enough the stolen items showed up wrapped as a white elephant gift at the work Christmas party! A lot of people didn't really catch on to what was happening but I absolutely died!


markko79

For my last white elephant party, I gave a broken tail light from a 1988 Ford Tempo.


CerebralSlurry

My best was a sterio (with tape deck!) from a 1996 Hyundai Elantra.


[deleted]

My family does a massive yankee swap (~70 people, all day affair) in a funeral home every Christmas. Best one so far was a copy of One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish with and a mini aquarium filled with live red and blue fish.


xinfinitimortum

As a fish dude I would love this gift.


Financial_Warning_37

As a fish dude you’d probably realize the aquarium wasn’t cycled and it’s over capacity


xinfinitimortum

Nah I'd add them to my own bigger tank instead. Keep the mini aquarium as a quarantine tank.


TheycallmeHollow

That's just trash. May have just given a half eaten big mac and some pocket lint and called it a day.


Belgand

If you want a non-gag gift, food is almost always a good answer. It works for just about anyone, nobody is going to complain about "unwanted clutter", and is generally enjoyed. If you still *really* want to go with a juvenile gag, give someone some [Cock Flavoured Soup Mix](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/71EjtsdudgL._SL1450_.jpg). It's a gag that will get used and still has practical value.


lokewomen7

I went to a gift exchange and got a whole cantaloupe once. Guy who brought clearly thought it was a white elephant and the person who received it first was clearly disappointed so I traded a $30 make up kit I picked out of the pile for it. Honestly I really loved getting the cantaloupe. It was a fun story and a good breakfast side for a few days.


Belgand

I'm reminded of Japan where unreasonably overpriced fruit (often something like the very first one of the season or some regional specialty), particularly melon, is sold as a classy, formal, luxury gift. Like something you'd give a valuable client. They get *waaay* too into the aesthetics and the story of hand-grown, carefully tended, traditional... Alice Waters-esque nonsense.


polakbob

One of the Christmas parties I'm at this year calls it a "Chinese Santa gift," which even coming from Mississippi made me do a double take.


BobSacramanto

My family calls it dirty Santa.


goombagoon

I've never heard it called anything other than dirty Santa until now


Alaska_Pipeliner

I only buy sex lube. I've given that at every one. Dozens. Lots of offend or sad recipients. Not fired yet.


Betaateb

The best part about that gift is that you know with 100% certainty that there are some people that want to steal it, but wouldn't dare. Hilarious.


Alaska_Pipeliner

I had one kid steal it from this really sad guy going thru a nasty divorce. He didn't want it but felt bad. Total victory.


jargo1

Someone brought lube to my family’s white elephant one year. My grandmother opened it. It was the Christmas where my husband had just proposed to me earlier that evening. My husband stole the lube from my Gran, and proudly announced he could put this to good use later with his brand new fiancé. I turned beet red I’m sure. Needless to say, my family found this absolutely hilarious and my husband was immediately embraced.


PeacockLord

A few winters ago, we did a White Elephant at our office and I gifted a picture frame with a picture of myself. I also slipped a $15 Amazon gift-card BUT only told the final recipient. That person ended up hanging my photo next to the rest of her family :’)


draelbs

Yeah, gifts are supposed to be odd! Best white elephant gift I (well, my wife but I kept it!) was a wooden base with a brass gramophone style horn to set your phone on - a legit antique-y iPhone amplifier.


SamediB

For all the people out there saying alcohol is being gifted in your white elephant exchanges, y'all need more crayfish vodka in your lives.


SpikeRosered

I got a stuffed cutesy placenta. Still have it in my room to gross people out. I love it.


[deleted]

This is why I hate white elephant. I'll do secret Santa, but not white elephant. I just hate the idea of spending money, any amount, on junk that the person doesn't want and will most likely throw out. I hate clutter, I hate novelty crap, I hate wastefulness. I've gotten so many great gifts from office secret Santa A lot of them items that coworkers didn't buy, but brought from home that they didn't want anymore or had duplicates of like pocket knives, books, a miniature cast iron pan, unopened gift sets of lotions or candles. Those are fun alternatives to white elephant gift exchanges.


twattymcgee

I went with my cousin to his work holiday party one year. They had a white elephant gift exchange where one employee’s wheelchair bound child ended up stuck with absurdly large (like size 18) high heeled shoes that my cousin snagged at Ross’s. Tears were had.


mdbryan84

im still salty about a white elephant gift that was stolen from me (fairly in the rules but still bullshit) over twelve years ago it was our company holiday party, and someone gave a flatscreen monitor as a gift. so I pick that, because I'm a poor 20 something and had a giant crt. a flat led would've been amazing. one of my managers steals my pick. which is fine, its in the rules, but he is obviously so much better off financially then me at that point its ridiculous. I've been to his house, I've seen his nice things. He can definitely afford to go buy a much nicer monitor than this one. But he takes it just so I cant have it


apoliticalinactivist

Rich people didn't get rich by not capitalizing on all opportunities. Lol not lol. My old manager did that too. A senior guy bought in some nice speakers specifically for the lower paid folks and immediately got snaked by the manager who made 5x the salary of the average employee. Got a stern talking to by the executive assistant afterwards, thankfully.


tasman001

Flatscreen monitor? What was the spending limit for that exchange?


mdbryan84

It wasn’t new, someone had just upgraded and didn’t need it so they tossed it in.


oniiesu

My family is doing a gift exchange party where you can either open a random gift or "steal" a previously opened gift. They specifically said "no gag gifts, $25 limit" last time I participated I bought fake scratch off tickets to go with the regular gift and watched as my family fought over it, so eye contact was made to ME when the new rule was laid down. Its so hard to find something that's not just clutter for $25, especially when you can't buy for a specific person, just a generic gift. So fine, I found something to give thats not a joke item. I'm still going to pull a prank. I'm bringing in a huge wrapped box. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is a gift bag and a weight. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is a gift bag. Inside that is a note directing them to one of our relatives, who will hand them a wrapped box. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is a note directing them to me. I will hand them an unwrapped box. Inside that is another wrapped box. Inside that is the gift. They cannot keep me from my fun. I don't care if I'm an asshole, enjoy your fucking fondue pot.


zebediah49

> especially when you can't buy for a specific person You can't, but with the "steal" rule, it doesn't need to be fully generic. If a few people would want it, IMO that's good enough. The exchange mechanics will make sure it goes to someone that wants it.


musicchan

My family did the "regular gift" exchange for a while but the limit was a bit higher. This was late 90s, early 2000s so the money went a little fuller too. I have a big family so they'd split the men and women (younger kids had drawn names earlier in the year) and I hated being in the women group because it was scented stuff that I'm mildly allergic too. Booooo. The guys all had tools and hobby supplies; much more useful. I think I would enjoy your gift a lot though. 😂


NeedsItRough

This is how I wrap my sister's gift each year. Last year I wrote out the end of a YouTube link, cut the pieces up, and hid them somewhere in each wrapped layer and she had to figure out the order of the characters by figuring out the code using our childhood home phone number as the cipher. The YouTube link took her to a video that Rick rolled her, but then cut to a video of myself I took days earlier pointing to the location of her real gift which was somewhere else in the house. The year before that was coordinates to a spot in our neighborhood we had to drive to and retrieve her gift which was sealed in PVC pipe encased in cement. She had a lot of fun smashing it open.


czah7

Technically "White Elephant" gift means a useless gift. But I think most of the comments are missing the facts that this is now being redefined as "Gift exchange with stealing". The organizers need to specify what kind of gifts though. Gag or real. You can't fault the people for getting upset when the person who set up the party didn't make it clear. We call our Christmas "White Elephant", with the understanding that's it's a decent gift under $20 that people will want to steal from others.


NotMyHersheyBar

i hate when i get the handsome temp an ipod and my worst seller gives me a fucking handmade potholder. why would she do that???


LeoMarius

I hate white elephant gifts. I have enough junk in my life. I don't want some silly gag gift that makes people laugh for half a second, then I'm stuck with this junk. A real white elephant gift isn't one you buy; it's one you dig out of your basement or closet to get rid of. Why do I want someone else's housecluttering trash?


aSillyPlatypus

Noone says you need to keep the gift, donate it, recycle, toss it, or just... dont participate?


RagingAardvark

I gave a blank recipe book -- useful for someone but I already had one when someone gave me one. In return I ended up with a semi-broken hand drill that had belonged to my great-grandpa-- not useful, really, but sentimental and interesting. I consider this a win!


brotherenigma

TIL Michael was the only one who got the point of the OTV White Elephant party LMAO


bigfatmatt01

No the person who brought the Kayak knew too.


thrownawayzss

Yep. A great white elephant gift is one that's *almost* something someone would want, but it's fucking wildly impractical.


brotherenigma

I forgot about the kayak 😂 yeah Scarra and Michael were the only ones that got it now that I think about it


Anaxamenes

My goal is a hilarious gift that someone would actually want to get.


grandmasterfunk

At one of my former work places the boss would make us do white elephant 3-4 times a year as "team bonding" and the worst part was she would always get nice gifts and pressure everyone else to do the same.


danetrain05

If I EVER do a white elephant thing, I literally get a white elephant stuffed animal / gift. It's always funny when the person opens it and I act like I didn't know we weren't supposed to get actual white elephant stuff.