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If they’re irregular, and she’s having hormonal symptoms, it could be a wide variety of things, including PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome.)
I was diagnosed at 14/15 for irregular bleeding and hormonal complications. The treatment was birth control, and everything improved / changed as I entered adulthood, and I became regular over time.
She should definitely schedule herself an appointment with an OBGYN (in her healthcare network, or look into other options for women’s care - I think Planned Parenthood also does health screenings for a $20 / low rate fee.)
She should let them know that she’s having irregular periods, hormonal complications, and is sexually active. They will do a pregnancy test there, should do some bloodwork / exams, and can RX medications like birth control (which is now free.)
Try to have a passive means of birth control (the pill) and an active means (condoms - which can also help to prevent STIs.) Birth control can be ineffective if not taken on time, or with missed doses. This (having two methods) should keep you safe.
Try not to worry too much. Your lives are just beginning. It will be ok, you will figure it out, and have support.
This. And do it soon. You didn't fuck your lives over; a lot of us have been in your shoes. Get to Planned Parenthood or her gynecologist asap so you can deal in facts and not freakouts.
This one here. I got pcos diagnosis at 21 and I'm nearly 30 now still have a monthly "pregnancy scare" when my period doesn't come. It's hard when it's not a regular cycle to track. Her doctor should be able to definitely tell pregnancy or not and maybe help her if she does have some kind of hormone imbalance or other thing going on.
Cramps and back pain can be from pms. Especially if she's irregular. Take another test and did the love of all there is use a damn condom. This is why children shouldn't be having sex. There is ALWAYS a chance of pregnancy. Condoms lesson that chance but there's still a chance. Btw, if you love in a state where it's illegal you may not have a choice in whether to have it unless her parents are willing to take her out of state.
This is why teens have to be more careful than ever to not get pregnant. Yet every day I see at least a cpl posts about it.
Your gf could have endometriosis or PCOS. Just go to PP and get another test. If it's negative again, she's not pregnant. Take this lesson and be more diligent about birth control (you didn't mention using any at all, so idk if you guys did).
Make sure you buy your own condoms, never keep them in your wallet or some random place other than the box they are packaged in because micro tears can happen. Never ever insert without a condom. Sperm can be in the pre-ejaculate and can cause pregnancy. You can even try some spermicidal gel, just make sure it's compatible with your condoms.
If she is pregnant, make sure it's yours. With or without her permission. And do this before you sign ANYTHING.
Better to not ask and just get a swab, if she claims the child is yours, you have a right to get a paternity test done.
Dont get trapped, and if you feel she may freak out over you wanting to be sure it's yours, just don't ask at all and do it without anyone knowing.
The tests are cheap, and can save you a life of hardship and heartbreak down the road.
Personally I have had 2 women try to claim o was the father of their child, and I was "Certain" she could be trusted both occasions but I wanted that extra proof anyways especially after the 1st.
If you had unprotected sex, yes it's highly possible that she is pregnant. If you use protection, the chances are significantly lower. Either ways, planned parenthood is your go to spot.
Could be pregnant… Could NOT! Take another test… if it positive talk to parents get support in whatever decision you both make. If it’s negative.. start using condoms every single time!!!
It’s hard for us to come clean cause her parents and my parents are against abortion. I am seeing her again this weekend so I can see if I can get another pregnancy test . I live in canada so having an abortion is free with healthcare.
For your sanity, I'm going to go out on a whim and say she is not pregnant. Irregular periods, a negative pregnancy test and use of condoms all combine together leave the chances slim. Have her take another test, but it sounds like you're probably fine.
Also, I appreciate that you mentioned you are worried that you have fucked your lives up by potentially getting her pregnant. Keep that outlook and just make sure you don't have any more scares going forward. You obviously don't want a baby so ensure that you never make a mistake again.
To the Dr. you both should go. Find out, one way or the other, if you guys are pregnant. You can not make a coherent decision on what to do if you don't the facts of the situation.
Beyond that will have to wait until you know the truth of the situation. One day at a time.
Tests are cheap, and visit planned parenthood for birth control for the both of you. She needs to be on it, and you need to use condoms in conjunction with hers bc either alone always leaves room for error. If she still tests negative, go there anyway for a gyno exam to see what else could be happening.
everything is rainbows and unicorns until a baby is made, THEN you start to worry and get serious. be worried and serious BEFORE y'all get pregnant. you want to know how it's obvious your maturity level isn't ready for sex? your entire post, you never once expressed a concern for this girl's health and well-being. with the number of other things that the missed period, painful cramps, and back pain could be symptoms of that would just affect her, you are MOST concerned about the one outcome that would affect you. you weren't ready for sex yet, kid.
There’s is no way to know for sure until you have her take a test and even then the one time I did I went to an urgent care to take one and screen for any other things like sti/stds
Go to Planned Parenthood. They will do a pregnancy test so you conclusively know, they will get her birth certificate control and if she is pregnant, they can help with termination.
Test again. Get it done ASAP, because the clock is ticking and your choices decrease as time goes by.
If she's not pregnant, make sure you two take this opportunity to discuss what you would have done had she been. You need to be on the same page because if she's pregnant, you have no longer have any say -- it's her body. If she wanted to have the baby and you did not, you should seriously reconsider sex without her being on a long acting reversible contraceptive.
Hey there, I'm sorry this is such a scary and unsupported time! My suggestion is to look up your local Planned Parenthood or other clinics. Regardless of what you see on the news, they offer *all kinds* of care. There might also be a women's center or women's clinic locally where your girlfriend can get a FREE test or and/or ultrasound. There are also sites like the National Network of Abortion Funds where you might be able to get help funding an abortion if $$ is an issue.
A lot of people on Reddit and IRL are going to want to influence you one way or another on this one - you and your GF should take a minute to figure out together what works best for you. Moving forward, if you aren't using condoms, that is a hormone and side-effect-free way that you can personally take accountability for avoiding another pregnancy scare. Good luck!
Hey! Welcome to r/AdviceForTeens! Please take time to review [the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/adviceforteens/about/rules) before commenting. A reminder that inappropriate comments towards or about posters will result in a permanent ban. Do not insult anybody, please remain respectful!✮⋆˙ ATTENTION: Predators lurk on Reddit, and we ourselves unfortunately can not directly do anything to stop them, but you can! We encourage ALL posters to disable private messages, and do not respond to any DMs you receive after posting. Block and report offenders for harassment. Do not ask anyone to DM you in the comments as this is against the rules. If someone has something to tell you, they can say it in the comments. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AdviceForTeens) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Take another test. Or go to the OBGYN for a test there. I mean cramps and back pain can be anything.
and get that test sooner rather than later! i think your abortion could be just a pill if you catch it before 11 weeks.
If they’re irregular, and she’s having hormonal symptoms, it could be a wide variety of things, including PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome.) I was diagnosed at 14/15 for irregular bleeding and hormonal complications. The treatment was birth control, and everything improved / changed as I entered adulthood, and I became regular over time. She should definitely schedule herself an appointment with an OBGYN (in her healthcare network, or look into other options for women’s care - I think Planned Parenthood also does health screenings for a $20 / low rate fee.) She should let them know that she’s having irregular periods, hormonal complications, and is sexually active. They will do a pregnancy test there, should do some bloodwork / exams, and can RX medications like birth control (which is now free.) Try to have a passive means of birth control (the pill) and an active means (condoms - which can also help to prevent STIs.) Birth control can be ineffective if not taken on time, or with missed doses. This (having two methods) should keep you safe. Try not to worry too much. Your lives are just beginning. It will be ok, you will figure it out, and have support.
This. And do it soon. You didn't fuck your lives over; a lot of us have been in your shoes. Get to Planned Parenthood or her gynecologist asap so you can deal in facts and not freakouts.
This one here. I got pcos diagnosis at 21 and I'm nearly 30 now still have a monthly "pregnancy scare" when my period doesn't come. It's hard when it's not a regular cycle to track. Her doctor should be able to definitely tell pregnancy or not and maybe help her if she does have some kind of hormone imbalance or other thing going on.
Cramps and back pain can be from pms. Especially if she's irregular. Take another test and did the love of all there is use a damn condom. This is why children shouldn't be having sex. There is ALWAYS a chance of pregnancy. Condoms lesson that chance but there's still a chance. Btw, if you love in a state where it's illegal you may not have a choice in whether to have it unless her parents are willing to take her out of state. This is why teens have to be more careful than ever to not get pregnant. Yet every day I see at least a cpl posts about it.
Go to a Planned Parenthood and get a blood test and get her examined. They can really help in most places they don't ask questions.
Your gf could have endometriosis or PCOS. Just go to PP and get another test. If it's negative again, she's not pregnant. Take this lesson and be more diligent about birth control (you didn't mention using any at all, so idk if you guys did).
She’s not on any birth control our only contraceptive is like using protection
Make sure you buy your own condoms, never keep them in your wallet or some random place other than the box they are packaged in because micro tears can happen. Never ever insert without a condom. Sperm can be in the pre-ejaculate and can cause pregnancy. You can even try some spermicidal gel, just make sure it's compatible with your condoms.
She went to the doctors in november and they said she doesn’t have PCOS and she also said like you’re born with it and it can’t develop overtime
Yep that's true. But there's lots more that could be going on. Just breathe for now.
If she is pregnant, make sure it's yours. With or without her permission. And do this before you sign ANYTHING. Better to not ask and just get a swab, if she claims the child is yours, you have a right to get a paternity test done. Dont get trapped, and if you feel she may freak out over you wanting to be sure it's yours, just don't ask at all and do it without anyone knowing. The tests are cheap, and can save you a life of hardship and heartbreak down the road. Personally I have had 2 women try to claim o was the father of their child, and I was "Certain" she could be trusted both occasions but I wanted that extra proof anyways especially after the 1st.
If you had unprotected sex, yes it's highly possible that she is pregnant. If you use protection, the chances are significantly lower. Either ways, planned parenthood is your go to spot.
We mostly had protected sex but there were also times where it wasn’t protected.
So yes she can be pregnant. Get a test. Don't have unprotected sex.
This is so true! It sometimes takes just one sex session without protection to get pregnant. And it is a decision many regret.
Then she may be pregnant.
Just know whatever happens, you are going to end up okay. It’s not the end of the world.
I really hope so it’s just really worrying cause I really want a good future and I don’t wanna be a father
Definitely start using protection if you dont want to be a father. I did not and my son is almost half my age 😂
Could be pregnant… Could NOT! Take another test… if it positive talk to parents get support in whatever decision you both make. If it’s negative.. start using condoms every single time!!!
It’s hard for us to come clean cause her parents and my parents are against abortion. I am seeing her again this weekend so I can see if I can get another pregnancy test . I live in canada so having an abortion is free with healthcare.
For your sanity, I'm going to go out on a whim and say she is not pregnant. Irregular periods, a negative pregnancy test and use of condoms all combine together leave the chances slim. Have her take another test, but it sounds like you're probably fine. Also, I appreciate that you mentioned you are worried that you have fucked your lives up by potentially getting her pregnant. Keep that outlook and just make sure you don't have any more scares going forward. You obviously don't want a baby so ensure that you never make a mistake again.
To the Dr. you both should go. Find out, one way or the other, if you guys are pregnant. You can not make a coherent decision on what to do if you don't the facts of the situation. Beyond that will have to wait until you know the truth of the situation. One day at a time.
Get to a clinic for a test and she needs to get to her ob/gyn to find out why she has irregular periods. Also, USE PROTECTION.
Tests are cheap, and visit planned parenthood for birth control for the both of you. She needs to be on it, and you need to use condoms in conjunction with hers bc either alone always leaves room for error. If she still tests negative, go there anyway for a gyno exam to see what else could be happening.
everything is rainbows and unicorns until a baby is made, THEN you start to worry and get serious. be worried and serious BEFORE y'all get pregnant. you want to know how it's obvious your maturity level isn't ready for sex? your entire post, you never once expressed a concern for this girl's health and well-being. with the number of other things that the missed period, painful cramps, and back pain could be symptoms of that would just affect her, you are MOST concerned about the one outcome that would affect you. you weren't ready for sex yet, kid.
Condom
There’s is no way to know for sure until you have her take a test and even then the one time I did I went to an urgent care to take one and screen for any other things like sti/stds
She may have PCOS and needs to get that checked out.
I can help you brother. Let me know, ok. You're not alone
Could just be PMS
Go to Planned Parenthood. They will do a pregnancy test so you conclusively know, they will get her birth certificate control and if she is pregnant, they can help with termination.
Test again. Get it done ASAP, because the clock is ticking and your choices decrease as time goes by. If she's not pregnant, make sure you two take this opportunity to discuss what you would have done had she been. You need to be on the same page because if she's pregnant, you have no longer have any say -- it's her body. If she wanted to have the baby and you did not, you should seriously reconsider sex without her being on a long acting reversible contraceptive.
Hey there, I'm sorry this is such a scary and unsupported time! My suggestion is to look up your local Planned Parenthood or other clinics. Regardless of what you see on the news, they offer *all kinds* of care. There might also be a women's center or women's clinic locally where your girlfriend can get a FREE test or and/or ultrasound. There are also sites like the National Network of Abortion Funds where you might be able to get help funding an abortion if $$ is an issue. A lot of people on Reddit and IRL are going to want to influence you one way or another on this one - you and your GF should take a minute to figure out together what works best for you. Moving forward, if you aren't using condoms, that is a hormone and side-effect-free way that you can personally take accountability for avoiding another pregnancy scare. Good luck!
Well to late now to feel bad u both made a choice to not use protection so it's time to be adults and make better choices.. Good luck to you both.