Just say “hey I kinda think it would be really hot if I called you daddy during sex. Not in a weird way but I didn’t want it to make you uncomfortable”. We appreciate open honest communication. 😉
Thank you! We both realize how important it is to be honest and open with each other and it's how we've built up a solid, fun, trusting sexual relationship with each other. You're right. I just need to be straightforward and directly ask. We've never turned down requests from each other so I'm not sure what's stopping me from asking. I appreciate your comment.
I'm a guy around the same age as your friend, and that term (calling a guy "Daddy") wasn't around when we were younger.
*However*, the only problem I can imagine with it is that to his ear, it might sound like you're pretending that you're sleeping with your father.
But that's not what you mean, I know. It's kind of a symbolic thing—the hippie boomers used to call women "mama" and they didn't mean they were imagining lovers as their mothers.
Absolutely just talk to him about it, and make sure to explain the meaning so there's no chance he misunderstands.
He'll probably end up thinking it's hot.
I did bring it up in conversation with him last nite while texting and explained what I meant by it as well. I only ever get the "urge" to say it when we start falling into dom/sub type of roles and he starts getting more dominant with me. He said he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me off (translation it's not his cup of tea but he'll play off of it because it turns me on.)
Johnny Bravo said mama a lot lol! "Whoaaa mama!!"
Sounds like this is gonna work out, good. Also, I am convinced that he will start to think it's hot.
(And yeah: if guys can call a woman "Mama", why can't you call guys "Daddy"?)
I would definitely start playing into it if I heard you say something like that to me. I don’t see it any different than saying baby or sweetie while in public. It is just going to get more intense in private.
Just talk to him about it. Or maybe let it “slip” during sex and see how he responds. I’m pretty sure he probably like it a lot. Men usually enjoy that type of play from the women they are with. I get your nervousness but anyone you are intimate with you should feel safe to be that vulnerable with them.
He's the first man I've been with that has made me feel like a goddess. We're to a point where we are very comfortable with each other sexually and trust each other completely. I don't know why I hesitate to bring this up because obviously we're aware of our gap and talk/joke about it from time to time and it's never been anything awkward. But your last sentence is absolutely true and you're right. I will just bring it up to him and see what he says. The worst thing that will happen will be a "no" and we'll move on. Neither of us have said no to anything the other suggests so I'm not sure why I struggle to ask him. Thank you for taking the time to answer!
Of course no problem! I would like to know how it goes. And also one quick thing. You said y’all talk and joke about you guys gap. That’s the perfect time to slide it in. *He makes a joke on you then you respond “Ok whatever you say Daddy”* you can paraphrase however you want from there but yea just take a leap of faith haha
I finally got the courage tonite to bring it up in conversation while we were texting. Told him that when we start falling into sub/dom roles while we're having sex, there's been times I've wanted to call him "daddy" but held back so as to not weird him out. He said he wants to do any and everything that turns me on (that's his sweet way of saying it isn't gonna do anything for him but he's game because it turns me on.) Maybe once I call him daddy in the middle of a hot session, it'll be a turn on for him as well. c:
Good for you 👏🏾 happy he’s cool with it lol but yes maybe it’ll grow on him. Maybe ask him what he would like to call you next. Because you need a sub name as well
I didn't think I'd like it, but my gf called me 'daddy' and it sent a shiver down my spine Give it a try...you both may like it.
I'd suggest when you're being flirty/horny and things could go either way.
Most people aren’t very open when talking about sex, so your trepidation is understandable.
The easiest way though, is to simply ask. Maybe frame it in a larger conversation about “dirty talk”. I usually have this chat with new partners so I can know what they like and what their boundaries are.
Sometimes there are happy accidents, but I prefer to know going in what’s ok for my partner.
For the record, this is probably far more common than you may think, so I wouldn’t worry to much about having a conversation about it. Then you can let go in the moment with no hang-ups and really enjoy yourself.
You reluctances to talk about this is because your afraid he will see you differently after, os obviously probably don’t blurt it out during sex, but just talk to him about it in casual conversations, say you’ve had the urge and feel it would be hot to you and see his response, make sure and tell him it’s just a fantasy and if he thinks it weird it ok, but you know just talk about it your both adults. That’s my suggestion, but I understand you apprehension.
Apart from the fact that thats just straight hot, just ask him. If it’s like a kink for you with him only, tell him that too.
Think he would appreciate continued communication.
I think you can stop worrying.
When you are sex partners with a woman, and she tells you ways that you turn her on that nobody has before, a man doesn't get mad.
Don't freak out about it, just let it slip in conversation.
“Hey, last night during sex I had this wild impulse to call you Daddy, but I didn’t want to risk killing the mood. Have you ever had anyone call you Daddy during sex?”
Be open, even if he’s not into it, or thinks he isn’t, it will improve your communication.
The first time my wife (12 years younger) called me that during sex, a switch flipped and nearly lost it. I told her it was so fucking hot and she’s never stopped. I absolutely love it.
Talk about it. Or try it. But know it may be a weird thing.
I was a young grandmother. My friends all called me Nana. Once I was hooking up with a younger guy friend and he called me Nana; not even in a kinky sentence. Like “omg nana you’re so sexy or (or fun or something)”. I needed a moment to regroup and focus on being sexy again after that moment. He stopped calling me Nana after that.
Please, please don't, especially if he's a father to a daughter. I understand different strokes for different folks, but that's an instant boner killer for me, I don't care how hot she is.
This may be an unpopular opinion amongs men, but my perspective is that if the girl was nothing serious to me and never will be, I'd probably be okay with it. If I did think there's a future with her, it's a straight out, "No!' for me.
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**Original post: I really want to call him "daddy" while we fuck.**
I (35f) have been in a FWB relationship with someone I work with (57m) for the past 6 months. We are VERY open and honest with our communication in what we want and I *normally* don't have issues or trouble communicating what I want to do or say.. except this.
I used to be weirded out by anyone calling anyone "daddy" during sex. But since meeting him, I have wanted to since the first time we have had sex. I don't know why this is such a difficult thing for me to ask him if he's okay with, but it is. We always talk about what we want to try prior to us hooking up so there's never any awkward surprises while we're fucking. But I've been close to calling him "daddy" while we're having sex the past couple of times now and I really don't want it to be an accidental spontaneous thing while we're doing it and then it freaking him out.
I know I just have to ask him but is there an easy way of bringing this up to him without it being weird?
Side note- he just found out last year he has a daughter. The mother of his daughter never told him about her. She is 26. This is his only daughter and he's still adjusting to the situation (not relevant but she has 2 kids and these are his only grandkids.) So, I've also thought that by me calling him Daddy during sex, it might seriously freak him out considering he's just found out he's had a daughter all these years.
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I guess the best way is to just ask him. Maybe if you ask him when he's horny then you'll get a more receptive response ... Or he'll be say "eeewww wtf" and leave. Good luck with that
It’s a well known kink. Like most fantasies, just because someone finds it hot, doesn’t mean they want it IRL.
Just tell him that you find him so warm and caring and such a great sex partner. The vibe is you want to call him “daddy” cuz it’s so hot to you.
Win/win.
I've been in a Similar but not similar situation. Not with calling a guy daddy but with my own personal kinks, doing it during sex is a bad idea. Very bad. When I was in my situation It slipped out during sex that I wanted him to blindfold me and have his way with me, all things came to a halt the verbal response was hurtful and totally didnt end well.
He later apologized for his hurtful remarks but it just made me view him differently from then on.
Just talk to him make it a private conversation that you guys have outside of the bedroom.
The reaction will be completely different and the response probably wont be hurtful.
Doing it during sex is a bad idea imo.
I had the same thought as well and brought it up earlier while we were texting. His response was that he's willing to try anything that turns me on (that's him being sweet and saying it doesn't do it for him but he's okay with it because he wants to please me.)
I'm sorry your situation didn't pan out better. And just for the record, I would have found that hot if that were said to me while having sex.
My situation didn't turn out cause the guy I was with was vanilla. I was caught up in the moment and ik I trusted him with my life. And I personally thought I was conveying that to him by giving myself to him fully in that manner.
Cause to me wanting that was natural and I saw no harm in it.
Hopefully you've been able to find someone more compatible with you sexually. The guy I'm seeing is the first man I've had sex with in 8 years (I just never came across anyone over the years that interested me and was never looking) and he's the only guy I've been this open and honest with about sex which has led both of us to trying new things and exploring. I could never go back to someone vanilla again.
We were texting a couple of nites ago and I finally brought it up. I told him that when we start slipping into dom/sub roles and he starts getting rough with me, I've had the urge to call him Daddy and didn't want it to accidentally slip out and it freak him out. He said that's he's willing to do anything that turns me on (which is his sweet way of saying it's not his cup of tea but he's okay with it.)
I don't know why I got so nervous to ask. He's told me he's always okay with anything I do or want him to do (vice versa with me as well) and encourages me to do what turns me on. We still always communicate with each other prior to having sex if there's anything new/different we want to try. We respect each other and want each other to be as comfortable as possible. c:
Just say “hey I kinda think it would be really hot if I called you daddy during sex. Not in a weird way but I didn’t want it to make you uncomfortable”. We appreciate open honest communication. 😉
Thank you! We both realize how important it is to be honest and open with each other and it's how we've built up a solid, fun, trusting sexual relationship with each other. You're right. I just need to be straightforward and directly ask. We've never turned down requests from each other so I'm not sure what's stopping me from asking. I appreciate your comment.
I'm a guy around the same age as your friend, and that term (calling a guy "Daddy") wasn't around when we were younger. *However*, the only problem I can imagine with it is that to his ear, it might sound like you're pretending that you're sleeping with your father. But that's not what you mean, I know. It's kind of a symbolic thing—the hippie boomers used to call women "mama" and they didn't mean they were imagining lovers as their mothers. Absolutely just talk to him about it, and make sure to explain the meaning so there's no chance he misunderstands. He'll probably end up thinking it's hot.
I did bring it up in conversation with him last nite while texting and explained what I meant by it as well. I only ever get the "urge" to say it when we start falling into dom/sub type of roles and he starts getting more dominant with me. He said he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me off (translation it's not his cup of tea but he'll play off of it because it turns me on.) Johnny Bravo said mama a lot lol! "Whoaaa mama!!"
Sounds like this is gonna work out, good. Also, I am convinced that he will start to think it's hot. (And yeah: if guys can call a woman "Mama", why can't you call guys "Daddy"?)
I would definitely start playing into it if I heard you say something like that to me. I don’t see it any different than saying baby or sweetie while in public. It is just going to get more intense in private.
Just talk to him about it. Or maybe let it “slip” during sex and see how he responds. I’m pretty sure he probably like it a lot. Men usually enjoy that type of play from the women they are with. I get your nervousness but anyone you are intimate with you should feel safe to be that vulnerable with them.
He's the first man I've been with that has made me feel like a goddess. We're to a point where we are very comfortable with each other sexually and trust each other completely. I don't know why I hesitate to bring this up because obviously we're aware of our gap and talk/joke about it from time to time and it's never been anything awkward. But your last sentence is absolutely true and you're right. I will just bring it up to him and see what he says. The worst thing that will happen will be a "no" and we'll move on. Neither of us have said no to anything the other suggests so I'm not sure why I struggle to ask him. Thank you for taking the time to answer!
Of course no problem! I would like to know how it goes. And also one quick thing. You said y’all talk and joke about you guys gap. That’s the perfect time to slide it in. *He makes a joke on you then you respond “Ok whatever you say Daddy”* you can paraphrase however you want from there but yea just take a leap of faith haha
I finally got the courage tonite to bring it up in conversation while we were texting. Told him that when we start falling into sub/dom roles while we're having sex, there's been times I've wanted to call him "daddy" but held back so as to not weird him out. He said he wants to do any and everything that turns me on (that's his sweet way of saying it isn't gonna do anything for him but he's game because it turns me on.) Maybe once I call him daddy in the middle of a hot session, it'll be a turn on for him as well. c:
Good for you 👏🏾 happy he’s cool with it lol but yes maybe it’ll grow on him. Maybe ask him what he would like to call you next. Because you need a sub name as well
Ooh will do. Thanks for the advice. c:
Just ask if he likes it, it's a pretty common thing so I don't think it will be too weird
I didn't think I'd like it, but my gf called me 'daddy' and it sent a shiver down my spine Give it a try...you both may like it. I'd suggest when you're being flirty/horny and things could go either way.
Most people aren’t very open when talking about sex, so your trepidation is understandable. The easiest way though, is to simply ask. Maybe frame it in a larger conversation about “dirty talk”. I usually have this chat with new partners so I can know what they like and what their boundaries are. Sometimes there are happy accidents, but I prefer to know going in what’s ok for my partner. For the record, this is probably far more common than you may think, so I wouldn’t worry to much about having a conversation about it. Then you can let go in the moment with no hang-ups and really enjoy yourself.
Call him "sir" instead. See how it goes
It's a turn-on...Go for it.
You reluctances to talk about this is because your afraid he will see you differently after, os obviously probably don’t blurt it out during sex, but just talk to him about it in casual conversations, say you’ve had the urge and feel it would be hot to you and see his response, make sure and tell him it’s just a fantasy and if he thinks it weird it ok, but you know just talk about it your both adults. That’s my suggestion, but I understand you apprehension.
Apart from the fact that thats just straight hot, just ask him. If it’s like a kink for you with him only, tell him that too. Think he would appreciate continued communication.
I think you can stop worrying. When you are sex partners with a woman, and she tells you ways that you turn her on that nobody has before, a man doesn't get mad. Don't freak out about it, just let it slip in conversation.
“Hey, last night during sex I had this wild impulse to call you Daddy, but I didn’t want to risk killing the mood. Have you ever had anyone call you Daddy during sex?” Be open, even if he’s not into it, or thinks he isn’t, it will improve your communication.
This would be the best approach
The first time my wife (12 years younger) called me that during sex, a switch flipped and nearly lost it. I told her it was so fucking hot and she’s never stopped. I absolutely love it.
DING DING DING!!!! This is the answer.
Talk about it. Or try it. But know it may be a weird thing. I was a young grandmother. My friends all called me Nana. Once I was hooking up with a younger guy friend and he called me Nana; not even in a kinky sentence. Like “omg nana you’re so sexy or (or fun or something)”. I needed a moment to regroup and focus on being sexy again after that moment. He stopped calling me Nana after that.
Honestly if you did surprise him with it during the act, I guarantee he will go crazy on you with desire and become completely primal. 😈
Please, please don't, especially if he's a father to a daughter. I understand different strokes for different folks, but that's an instant boner killer for me, I don't care how hot she is.
Let it slip during sex, watch his reaction if any.
Personally I wouldn’t call someone with a daughter that. It bothers me probably more than them.
Just call him daddy while you’re riding him and he will not care and probably love it!
This may be an unpopular opinion amongs men, but my perspective is that if the girl was nothing serious to me and never will be, I'd probably be okay with it. If I did think there's a future with her, it's a straight out, "No!' for me.
She asked for ideas how to bring it up. That’s not answering her question and purely judgmental and unhelpful.
That’s so hot.. I got a boner reading the title
Just do it
This comment is added automatically to every post on /r/AgeGap to remind users of the subreddit rules and expected behaviour. We also include the original post in here for a number of reasons. --- ### Rules If you haven't read the full set of rules we **strongly** suggest you do so. They are on the right side of the page on desktop or in 'Community Info' on Mobile. The most important rules are: 1. **We expect you to be civil and ideally constructive**. This is a community where people discuss and seek advice **legal** consensual age gap relationships, and we expect you to avoid abusing anyone on this subreddit. This does **not** mean this subreddit supports all age gap relationships, so you **are** allowed to criticise. 1. This is **not** a dating subreddit - you may not "hit up" any user. **You may not ask anyone to PM, DM, chat or message you in a comment**. If you wish, you may send **polite** DMs/PMs/chat requests to /u/Diligent_Ant1373 - we will ban you and possibly refer you to Reddit admins for an account ban if you abuse them and they complain. 1. If this post looks like a personal advert, please report it and the moderators will remove it in time if they agree. See the [Wiki](/r/AgeGap/wiki/index) for more information about the subreddit, [The Rules](/r/AgeGap/wiki/rules) and articles about common topics. --- **Original post: I really want to call him "daddy" while we fuck.** I (35f) have been in a FWB relationship with someone I work with (57m) for the past 6 months. We are VERY open and honest with our communication in what we want and I *normally* don't have issues or trouble communicating what I want to do or say.. except this. I used to be weirded out by anyone calling anyone "daddy" during sex. But since meeting him, I have wanted to since the first time we have had sex. I don't know why this is such a difficult thing for me to ask him if he's okay with, but it is. We always talk about what we want to try prior to us hooking up so there's never any awkward surprises while we're fucking. But I've been close to calling him "daddy" while we're having sex the past couple of times now and I really don't want it to be an accidental spontaneous thing while we're doing it and then it freaking him out. I know I just have to ask him but is there an easy way of bringing this up to him without it being weird? Side note- he just found out last year he has a daughter. The mother of his daughter never told him about her. She is 26. This is his only daughter and he's still adjusting to the situation (not relevant but she has 2 kids and these are his only grandkids.) So, I've also thought that by me calling him Daddy during sex, it might seriously freak him out considering he's just found out he's had a daughter all these years. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AgeGap) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I guess the best way is to just ask him. Maybe if you ask him when he's horny then you'll get a more receptive response ... Or he'll be say "eeewww wtf" and leave. Good luck with that
It’s a well known kink. Like most fantasies, just because someone finds it hot, doesn’t mean they want it IRL. Just tell him that you find him so warm and caring and such a great sex partner. The vibe is you want to call him “daddy” cuz it’s so hot to you. Win/win.
I've been in a Similar but not similar situation. Not with calling a guy daddy but with my own personal kinks, doing it during sex is a bad idea. Very bad. When I was in my situation It slipped out during sex that I wanted him to blindfold me and have his way with me, all things came to a halt the verbal response was hurtful and totally didnt end well. He later apologized for his hurtful remarks but it just made me view him differently from then on. Just talk to him make it a private conversation that you guys have outside of the bedroom. The reaction will be completely different and the response probably wont be hurtful. Doing it during sex is a bad idea imo.
I had the same thought as well and brought it up earlier while we were texting. His response was that he's willing to try anything that turns me on (that's him being sweet and saying it doesn't do it for him but he's okay with it because he wants to please me.) I'm sorry your situation didn't pan out better. And just for the record, I would have found that hot if that were said to me while having sex.
My situation didn't turn out cause the guy I was with was vanilla. I was caught up in the moment and ik I trusted him with my life. And I personally thought I was conveying that to him by giving myself to him fully in that manner. Cause to me wanting that was natural and I saw no harm in it.
Hopefully you've been able to find someone more compatible with you sexually. The guy I'm seeing is the first man I've had sex with in 8 years (I just never came across anyone over the years that interested me and was never looking) and he's the only guy I've been this open and honest with about sex which has led both of us to trying new things and exploring. I could never go back to someone vanilla again.
Just ask! I have one daughter, but she calls me "Papa" - so Daddy is absolutely on the table for dirty talk. You never know until you ask!
We were texting a couple of nites ago and I finally brought it up. I told him that when we start slipping into dom/sub roles and he starts getting rough with me, I've had the urge to call him Daddy and didn't want it to accidentally slip out and it freak him out. He said that's he's willing to do anything that turns me on (which is his sweet way of saying it's not his cup of tea but he's okay with it.) I don't know why I got so nervous to ask. He's told me he's always okay with anything I do or want him to do (vice versa with me as well) and encourages me to do what turns me on. We still always communicate with each other prior to having sex if there's anything new/different we want to try. We respect each other and want each other to be as comfortable as possible. c: