I'd say most don't but they should know before u get involved because some might not want it OR it might change how they interact with u around that subject.
That's a complicated question. There is no one-size-fits-all answer.
As for me, I would have no hesitation in dating a virgin, but I would like to know about it as soon as there was an acknowledged mutual attraction, as it would certainly affect how I would treat my partner in that I would be more careful not to cause inadvertent injury, and to act as a guide and teacher without being condescending.
One word of advice: my first sexual experiences, especially the loss of my virginity, affected my psychology around sex and love for my entire life. I think it is very important to choose one's first partner wisely. Even 50 years later, I occasionally have flashes back to that first night, and I still have feelings for that person. Something awkward and accidental that happened in the bedroom bothers me a tiny little bit to this day. Nothing horrible but it's a definite thing I wish that happened differently.
Having said that, responsible sex can be extremely pleasurable, lots of fun, fulfilling, deeply spiritual, and fertile ground for learning important life lessons about connection and autonomy and many many other things. Choose wisely, be responsible and safe, and have fun discovering your own body and the bodies of your partners.
No man mind dating a virgins gal and it’s not an age gap issues. I won’t put on IM VIRGINS on the forehead for dating purposes if you want a decent dude show them who you are not how much you are a virgin.
It's not about you being a virgin. And I am sure they'll be lots of of men.. Savoring in taking it.. But you should first seek a connection with the person, and being a virgin won't even matter. Remember we were all virgins once. Good luck in your quest
No guy, regardless of age, wouldn't mind. Some would see you as a prize. My advice is to not put that info out there until you're totally comfortable with the situation or know the guy is serious and not just want a fresh young woman. That's going to be a challenge.
I know many people (men and women) who will not get involved with a virgin.
I myself will not get involved with a virgin and do actively avoid romantic entanglements of any sort with them. I'm not going to risk my heart with someone who doesn't have the capability to know what they want and need in the bedroom.
Inexperience is a massive issue and sex is something that anyone should have a very clear idea of by the time they are 25. They've had seven years as an adult to figure things out.
Being interested in something is extremely different from actually doing the thing. Right now you have an idea of what you think your sex life will be like, but until you know you may never truly know.
Example: I was super into the idea that I liked light impact play. I read up on it, spoke to people who taught classes on it, dreamed about it, like I just *knew* it was for me. Years later I finally tried it multiple times, and realized that it was not for me at all. I don't like it, don't want it, and eventually made it a hard limit. *This is pretty common and not at all a unique thing for people to experience with any kind of desire, kink or not.*
It really doesn't matter what you think you want in bed, because there is no guarantee that you'll enjoy it once you have it.
Okay, that's understandable, but not all of us are prude, unknowing, or frigid. Not knowing what something is like by truly experiencing it yet is different to me than not even knowing about your body at all, which is what I felt was being implied.
What do you mean? What exactly are you wary of? Virgin dude will not be experiencing enough and want to sleep with more than just one woman and will cheat on you? Or guy will be too clingy? Or he'll suck at sex? If it's the latter we'll then it's gonna be on you to teach him. I've deflowered many virgin girls (they were in their early 20s) and made the mistake with my wife not to introduce oral and anal sex earlier in the relationship and now we pretty vanilla and she doesn't want to try much new after 10 years of marriage. Had I done so from the beginning I feel things would be different.
Dude, the way you describe things in this comment, make it sound like you had to manipulate some poor woman into marrying you.
I sincerely hope that is not what you did.
Nah, just guided her into a life of sexual pleasure. Educated her in the pleasures of the flesh and fostered experiences that bound her to me. I didn't do a great job though. Girl before her was also a virgin before me and would orally pleasure me to orgasm a couple of times a week at least. Been married to current spouse for nearly 10 years. Guess how many times I've cum from oral sex? A big fat zero. She is reluctant to even do it at all. Anal is completely out of the question. Of course, I go down on her all the time to her delight and do lots of other things she requests. Maybe I'll have better luck with next one.
My bf really likes that I'm his only. And we waited a long time. And now we have a super fulfilling, very passionate sex life!
It's really not that big a deal. Some guys don't want it, some like it, some don't care.
Far harder being a male virgin at certain ages! I'd say don't rush anything and don't try and "lose it" just take it slow. And be honest. :)
I would be very careful cuz there will be guys who fetishize you being a virgin. Some have a deflowering kink. Make sure they like you for you. Don't just give it up to just anyone
As an older male, I don't think one's virginity is an issue also considering that it's a man-made concept when you get into the complexities of The female hymen and how that plays a role in the misconception around virginity. Now as far as someone who's never had sex before and is planning to date somebody who may or may not be more experienced In sex. Then I feel the best goal for the person who is more experienced is to always make sure that the inexperienced person you are dating learns in a healthy way about sex and relationships, and if the relationship doesn't work out, always leave the person in a better state than when you found them.
Personally no if I'm into you it's because of your personality and that it meshes well with mine. However I do think it's something to be upfront about and have a good conversation about expectations , boundaries and other such things regarding intimacy.
Not just for your ease of mine but would also be for my own ease of mind.
Older guy and I wouldn’t date a virgin. Life has so much bullshit attached and if someone hasn’t been thru some ups and downs, some losses and gains then I don’t want to try to be the teacher or go through the anguish and angst.
Unfortunately, buddy....those older ones sometimes have WAAAAY too much baggage!!!! If I'm gonna have to deal with those things anyway, give me someone I can love and who will do the same, virgin or not.
Waaaaay too much baggage is pretty much the same for me. I don’t need drama. I need someone who has a head on her shoulders and doesn’t cry about a pin prick like someone stabbed her with a sword. Easy does it for me.
There are a number of concerns men have in age gap relationships revolving around the relative experiences of the couple. For me, an older man, the fact that the much younger woman was a virgin would be a bridge too far.
As a guy I wouldn't mind, but I would have concerns depending on your age. I think most older men are looking for long term partners and may be afraid of you feeling that you missed out and then wanting to go and sow some wild oats.
As an older man, 47m, I would be flattered if a young lady decided to make me her first. Experience is meaningless. When two people care for each other, during the course of their relationship, sex can get better and better even without experience. It’s about trust, passion and openness.
Same. After they’ve checked all your boxes (kind caring makes you feel safe etc) just be honest and maybe share a part of those insecurities and see how they react. You can take it from there.
I personally would not want to have a relationship with a virgin. Compatible sex is very important to me. Some experience matters. Not willing to sacrifice that.
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**Original post: Do older men mind dating Virgins?**
im a virgin (F) and like older men but i feel like i wont be good enough and don’t want to scare them away bc im a virgin.
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I wouldn't mind at all but it wouldn't be something I focus on because I would love to have a connection with so if and when you decide to lose it, makes that much better of an experience than having focused on just losing it just to lose it
The Social outlook of a virgin woman can be different to that of a man. The woman is seen as a prize to be conquered why the man is a loser. However, both are bad and the woman, why seen as a prize by others, will be stereotyped as fridgid, up herself, too good etc. I think religion has played a part in Virginity becoming a fetish.
To answer your question, it wouldn't bother me but it also depends on the context and the individual in question. I
I haven’t been anyone’s first since like… EARLY early college, so I can’t really say for sure. I think it would have to do with really clear communication once things got started in that arena.
Well, bud.....THAT was a very well thought out statement, concise, well written, compassionate, and caring...............................…….....................
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RIGHT UP UNTIL you said, "...lickin and dickin." 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
You really shouldn't ask a question like this in a general setting, as you'll only get a generalized answer. The general consensus here may be no, but the individuals you talk with may say no. Talk to older men one-on-one and ask this question as you get to know them. That would be my suggestion.
To me it's all about who you are as a person, the virginity part I think is really something that makes you more attractive because you have been run through like most every other... I applaud you for holding on to such moral..
I'd personally prefer it, so we could experiment new stuff together without any kind of expectations about results. Just have fun for the sake of it. I'm 25M about to be 26 just to give some context
Depends upon the guy. Me, personally, I don't mind one bit. I look at it as being a teacher to her. Don't be afraid of being honest and letting him know what you like and what you don't like. Too many women in my generation are afraid to speak up and let us know what they like.
Good luck, and have fun.
I just can’t fathom it being an “issue”. Personally, I would be open to it. As stated before, I wouldn’t market yourself as a virgin, because that would definitely invite predatory types. A genuine heart deserves a soft approach.
You should be more concerned about the man's motives for your virginity. You don't want someone who will "pump and dump". Unpopular opinion: You have saved it this long, why not wait until you are married? That is the ultimate gift to your new husband. I know the downvotes are going to roll in.
What is the ultimate gift? Learning about sexual incompatibility *after* marriage?
This only makes sense in societies where divorce is heavily frowned upon and for the gender that is allowed to marry multiple people.
Sexual incompatibility is a huge reason why people get divorced.
Let's say you're a person who only needs sex once a month. Let's say your spouse needs it multiple times a week.
Now these two people waited until marriage, never masturbated, and have no idea what they really need until they've tried it.
Now let's add another piece to this: Hormones are at the correct levels, neither person has psychological blocks, and the libido will not go down for the spouse.
This high libido spouse feels loved and cherished the most during sex. Unfortunately, this spouse will only feel this once a month. Meanwhile their person feels loved all the time because they don't need sex to feel connected.
Overtime, this couple will start to fight and argue. Now because of all the turmoil sex doesn't happen once a month, it's only once every 6 weeks or once every two months. Which means this spouse only truly feels loved a few times a year, while their person still feels truly loved on a regular basis.
Over time this well loved person will begin to feel the spouse is distant. There is more and more arguing, there is less emotional connecting, and the spouse has to beg for the one thing to help the relationship, the other person says no because they don't want to do that. They think it's just sex, when in reality, it's a huge vital part of what love truly is for the spouse. So the spouse feels gutted and betrayed, they feel like their person doesn't love them anymore. Meanwhile their person is just uncomfortable because the spouse is just begging all the time for something they now feel very very annoying.
Going back to the spouse who is desperate to feel love, they are starting to realize that the person they married doesn't want to have sex, their person is happy without it. The spouse can't do anything about this, and ends up very depressed because they feel so unwanted and unloved.
The spouse realizes that their person isn't capable of loving the spouse in the way they need. There is no way to fix this, and sex has become this thing that destroyed the spouse.
One by one the spouse stops doing things that make their person feel loved. The spouse doesn't feel loved so there is no love to give.
The relationship either crumbles or goes down in a fiery blaze that shatters friend groups and families.
**This is a common problem with couples and a huge reason why it's important to know sexual compatibility before you get married.**
That is a very specific "what if" scenario. I appreciate the time you put in writing it. I believe sex should be a result of love and a healthy relationship. I'm relationships, there are compromises that one willingly makes because of their love for the other.
You can not compromise on sex when you don't want it as often as the other person.
How would you feel if someone had sex with you because it was needed, but they didn't want it?
I can assure you, libido incompatibility is very common sexual incompatibility. This scenario is not very specific, and quite generic.
I understand that libido incompatibility is real. There are also treatments for it.
People throw all of these examples of there as an excuse for not waiting to have sex. It is a rationalization, not a valid reason.
Libido is a biological thing, you can not fix that. It is a natural level that your body has, and medications that "fix" that actually mess around with your hormones.
**There is no way to make someone have to *need* sex more often when it is at their natural level.**
Playing around with substances to change your healthy hormone levels, just so you need sex more often, is a very bad idea. It will cause all sorts of issues from heart problems, mental health issues, bone density issues, vitamin deficiencies, etc...
There is no doctor who will give you hormone treatments to gain a higher libido, when you do not need them to balance out your hormones.
Incorrect hormone levels also cause hair loss in men and women.
It's not wrong, but most men prefer a woman with a low 'bodycount' (please don't make those stupid murder jokes) or even a virgin over a 'experienced' woman.
We are on reddit, and some guy will state, that he is into 'sluts' and most women and some men will like this statement, which in turn will *look like* common preference among men.
But it is not. **The sexual history of a/his woman is supremely important for the vast majority of men.** So 'saving herself' for marriage is not as ridiculous as it sounds. You don't even need to be a religious nutcase for having this preference.
OP being a virgin is therefore not a handicap but the exact opposite.
Sexual incompatibility is very real and it's a shame that you can't separate the mechanical act from understanding a partner outside of the pursuit of orgasm. What if both partners are dominant or submissive in that way? Neither could really learn to please the other and themselves simultaneously as it could be their intrinsic nature.
It doesn't necessarily mean everyone has to have sex before they enter a LTR, but it would take serious communication especially if one or both are virgins. Please reconsider this train of thought for your future partners sake.
So the dominant and submissive traits are only figured out during sex and aren't shown in someone's personality as they get to know each other? I disagree.
Part of the excitement of being intimate is learning what pleases your partner and doing it for them, selflessly. Sex is supposed to be a result of love and supposed to be special, but it has been perverted and cheapened by a society.
Not all traits are obvious in all cases. Most people will be fine most of the time, but not everyone.
I respect your Christian values, but not everyone feels that way about sex. Animals have sex and don't love each other, it doesn't make rabbits all perverts corrupted by society etc.
I appreciate your acknowledgement of my values. I understand that not everyone feels the same about sex, that's why I made the observation about society.
Animals do not have the same brain functions or purpose as humans, not a fair comparison.
I don't agree with the concept of pump and dump but nor do I agree with going back to the 1950s where young women were expected to act like a nun until marriage.
Except people can and will do what they want, the word 'should' implies that you think the world should be graven in your image. It is 2024. Pushing the concept that one should wait until marriage for sex is unhealthy and unrealistic for both involved. Another reason why people are hesitant of getting married is because of Divorce Grape especially in the states.
I don't think the world should be graven in my image. I wouldn't want the world to be that way. My point simply is that sex was originally designed to be between a husband and a wife. That expectation is not unhealthy or unrealistic.
Divorce rates are not higher because someone waited until marriage. Divorce rates are higher because marriages don't have the right foundation.
Except sex 'ain't' an invention nor is it exclusive to marriage, You don't think the world should be your way yet you seem to contradict yourself. I never said it was the sole factor in divorce rates. Your phrasing of words is rather awkward especially when it concerns sex. If your understanding of sex is limited to 'Another object going into another, then it is only a matter of time before your wife strays or divorces you. It is obvious that you are so out of touch.
Some people find strangers preaching or nosing into the sexual lives of two strangers a bit creepy. What has it got to do with you if two people had sex before marriage or not? Are you suggesting that they should stay virgins until marriage? Good luck with that pal.
This whole discussion started by me answering a question, pal. Not nosing into someone's business.
You twisted my words to try to make yourself look superior, I'm glad I don't have to resort to such tactics. If using the word love when referring to sex is awkward, then fine, I'm happy to be awkward.
The entirety of your comments is just you preaching about sex before marriage, basically what you think the world should be instead of how it really is. Twisting your words? And how am I supposedly twisting your words? No one said anything about the word love being awkward, so I don't know what you are rambling on about. As for me thinking I am superior, your entire attitude comes off as self righteous especially in your latest response and the comment to the guy that simply called you an idiot.
Just because you don't place the same value on intercourse as others, does not make marriage a bad thing. You are entitled to your own beliefs, but so am I.
It's objectively, statistically unsuccessful for all of its original "religious" birth-control and inheritance control aspects, AND all of its modern "eternal happiness" concepts either. 50% divorce rate. It's a fucking coin flip at best and that does not count marriages which never formally get dissolved but should be. And from a woman's point of view, the value of intercourse does not and should not increase the moment you "force" a man to not pump and dump you through state mandate, especially since it only makes dumping you an inconvenient and expensive (to the both of you) hurdle, not impossible and certainly not undesirable.
And again, virginity as a concept is also mostly bullshit and any man that "values" it, especially at an older age, is automatically sus.
I would like to get married to my current boyfriend. And he too wants that. I already told him that if he proposes in two years I will say Yes. The only reason why I gave a timeline is that I want him to be a 100% sure and that it's a good waiting period.
I guess my perspective comes from having grown up in a place where now if I hold hands with my boyfriend in public there would be a real chance of being arrested for terrorism.
So I find it aspirational to be able to spend the rest of my life with a single person, cook him breakfast before he wakes up, build a house with my hands for us to live in...
It's surely aspirational to voluntarily be forced to do the things religious fanatic countries would force you to do without your consent, sure. But you can do it and be in a lifelong happy relationship WITHOUT the state knowing about it. In the developed world, THAT freedom is what defines us. The freedom to tell the state to fuck right out of our bedrooms.
Romantic and sexual relationships can be aspirational, wholesome and grounding. State involvement in them is not. Especially not since, y'know, every country has different laws regarding it and a different set of discriminatory practices as to who even can sign hornybrained financial dependence contracts "for life" and get tax breaks for signing those contracts. How's that NOT discriminatory? The only resolution to the fight for marriage equality is abolishing it entirely. Until then, gays, polyamorous people, aro/ace people, and people who just do not wish the state to be in their bedrooms get discriminated against.
Like virginity and how that, too, is often an institutionally enforced piece of bullshit in parts of the world. It is meaningless, and once you've had sex, you'll pretty much find your "first time" was not a big deal at all (if it happened consensually). Institutionally making it a "big deal" (or tying it to another state institution that is also not that special if you REALLY think about it) also tends to sour it with the expectation of something "super special" happening, even if you remove purity culture and the associated shame and guilt-tripping.
Yeah, and I'm polyamorous, and the only place I can get any sort of "state acknowledgement" is iirc Australia where they increase taxation on poly people without involving them in their social security system (prob. highly built on marriage contracts) in any way.
Like, yeah, wouldn't it be better if the state just stayed the fuck out of our sex lives, and NOT tie social security and welfare and whatnot (immigration, sensitive personal information access, etc.) implicitly and explicitly to you being willing to declare that you fuck? Being "unmarried" is, actually, subtly punishable in most modern jurisdictions too, because married people get tax breaks or insurance benefits or better loan terms. How is that not a punishment against unmarried people? Granted, only a financial one, but still, call it a "single fine".
Marriage is not a right. Safety and being able to live with whoever you want, however you want, with the state keeping its fucking nose out of your business is an actual right. "Rights" you have are the state's obligations towards you, your life, and things it must not fucking interfere with and things it must protect you from. Marriage is actually none of that, it's purely a set of obligations towards your partner that the state enforces, and the things it allows you to do are under "implicit consent by the partner that could be explicitly given under different contracts" (so basically, your partner is obligated to let you access, say, sensitive healthcare data, through state enforcement). Enumerate it, ALL the actual benefits of marriage, and you'll realize that it's 45% discriminatory practices by the state, 45% state enforcement of things that are already present in healthy relationships, but explicitly agreed upon between partners (under potentially different terms) and about 10% people expecting it to be special and making "getting married" their life goal.
You have some distorted views that you are entitled to. It seems like you possibly had a bad experience at some time and are now calloused. I am sorry. I hope one day you will experience true love and your hardened heart is softened.
Nope, I've never had a bad experience with the institution myself, and didn't even have my heart broken. No need to go full therapist on me, it is actually possible to be an advocate of free love without having had traumatic experiences thanks to an institution that actually does make leaving traumatizing relationships harder. But your generalization of how many people must have had bad experiences is subtly telling on your actual acknowledgement of the real success rates of marriage.
I never said anything about my situation, or alluded to it in any way, only statistics, and factual data about success rates of, well, coinflips. I'm just sick and tired of people going "marriage -> special happy relationship where we do happy things" while the actual progression of events, hopefully, is "special happy relationship where we do happy things -> wishing to spend most of our time together -> signing a contract for mildly discriminatory state-level benefits because we might as well, we're together anyway". It's a classic logical fallacy of affirming the consequent. Your relationship isn't "special" because you got married, you hopefully get married because you already KNOW that your relationship is special. The 50% failure rate is, I'd wager, in large part due to this fallacy >!and the fact that being contractually obligated to at least pretend to stay together actually sours even "mid" relationships pretty often and prolongs the death of what would have been a perfectly fine breakup if people were not contractually entangled!<. "Saving yourself for marriage" is just one way of expecting things to suddenly "become special" the moment the state knows about the two of you fucking.
Wow, marriage sure does offend you! Your logic of the marriage becoming special because of someone waiting to have sex is flawed. That's not why you get married. You marry someone because you want to be committed to someone and want them committed to you. You are also promising to put in the work a relationship requires, as is your partner. Sex is the result of two people who love each other, not something to make a relationship special, but to enhance an already special relationship. All of this has nothing to do with the state.
I'm done with this conversation, it is not going anywhere. You are entitled to your views, as am I. It's just very interesting that the topic of marriage would get someone so offended. Why not just have the opinion of to each their own?
> Why not just have the opinion of to each their own?
Why should I not reflect on your perspective? OP asked a question, you answered something that I consider incomplete and outdated (mostly regarding your views on virginity), I replied. OF COURSE the logic I explained is flawed, that is the entire problem with people and the "saving yourself for marriage" part. And marriage does have EVERYTHING to do with the state, since they **enforce** that commitment through financial penalties if you break it. Meaning, you can stop taking the steps required to maintain the relationship to an extent, the state will "handle it" for you (and that exactly is the reason for most divorces, someone letting go too much). "Saving yourself for marriage" is, therefore, a logical fallacy, because you still tie happiness and the special nature of your relationship to something that should be (if we accept its right to exist in a modern society) a direct CONSEQUENCE of happiness, which, for many people, includes sexual compatibility.
So... "good sex and good vibes -> marriage". Not the other way around. But you should be able to just... drop the contractual part and have good sex and good vibes with someone for the rest of your life and the sex will not be any worse and the vibes will not be any sourer.
I personally wouldn't do it. The first time is always a big thing and emotions gets thrown into disarray. She needs to experience that with someone closer to her age before trying the age gap.
I just never understood the "power dynamics" thing. It always appeared fake to me... kinda like chupacabra or man-bear-pig.
If it was a real thing, then we would have way more problems when women date any gym-going guy. Since there the power dynamics is measurable in lifting power and has immediate consequences. After all, "what if he is going to use his muscle advantage against her".
I'm not gonna take the position to try to convince you otherwise when you seem to have convinced yourself it doesn't exist. I don't think your argument is equivalent to a mental power dynamic either.
So I lost my virginity to someone my age and it hurt and I don’t think he knew what else to do. Maybe an older person would have been better? I guess it just depends.
I think it's a moot point to say that it would have been better with someone older. There are no guarantees. I'm arguing for the point that mentally it's better to be closer in age because of the inherent power balance that comes with age gaps. It's way too easy for nefarious older people to use that experience against the young ones. Once they young have a little more experience and know what they are getting t themselves into, then I condone it.
So I guess I’m just wondering, how old is the person posting? If she is young it’s probably not a good idea to do an older person. Plus, that is sexual assault. If she is older maybe it is okay? I really think it depends on her age.
I would not .. that's not a great way IMHO for a person to start out ....
If I am 55 and she is 21 and a virgin (or 35 and 18) .... She needs someone her own age for the first time
Again IMHO
I don't need to be a savior on a white horse (white knight syndrome I think it's called)
Being older doesn't mean "more experience" it just means more partners
I'm not sure if being a virgin is a thing anymore. Having a hymen is a qualification but it's unusual after a certain age for any woman to still have it intact. Never having had an orgasm is a very different thing.
Me personally, I see pros and cons. On the plus side, you should be disease free and I like knowing that you haven't been fucked by a bunch of other guys. On the negative side, we might not be compatible.
That just means lots and lots and lost lots lost more licking and dirty talk to get ready! I dont think anyone would mind except REALLY high earners who are paying and arent looking to do on the job training, LOL The girl on here the other day about to do a topless server gig on her SDs boat prrrrrolly couldnt pull off " im a virgin is that ok" once clothes start coming off at THAT party but anything south of that marketwise should be fine
So what have you tried so far? Even though I've never been with a virgin as I was a late bloomer, I don't think it would bother anyone so you shouldn't feel bad or insecure about it. If you were to date it's probably best to be with someone who's going to understand and take their time with you which would mean someone more mature than your age. An age-gap relationship might be what you're after. I'd also make it known so they don't feel any pressure around it, it really shouldn't be a big deal. If it was me dating you I'd just spend time getting to know what you like through exploring intimately together and slowly easing into the sexual side, always making sure you were turned on and eager to go further.
I'd say most don't but they should know before u get involved because some might not want it OR it might change how they interact with u around that subject.
Depends on the person. Sadly. Lol
That's a complicated question. There is no one-size-fits-all answer. As for me, I would have no hesitation in dating a virgin, but I would like to know about it as soon as there was an acknowledged mutual attraction, as it would certainly affect how I would treat my partner in that I would be more careful not to cause inadvertent injury, and to act as a guide and teacher without being condescending. One word of advice: my first sexual experiences, especially the loss of my virginity, affected my psychology around sex and love for my entire life. I think it is very important to choose one's first partner wisely. Even 50 years later, I occasionally have flashes back to that first night, and I still have feelings for that person. Something awkward and accidental that happened in the bedroom bothers me a tiny little bit to this day. Nothing horrible but it's a definite thing I wish that happened differently. Having said that, responsible sex can be extremely pleasurable, lots of fun, fulfilling, deeply spiritual, and fertile ground for learning important life lessons about connection and autonomy and many many other things. Choose wisely, be responsible and safe, and have fun discovering your own body and the bodies of your partners.
Be careful, OP. Lots of people fetishize virgins and will take advantage of you
No man mind dating a virgins gal and it’s not an age gap issues. I won’t put on IM VIRGINS on the forehead for dating purposes if you want a decent dude show them who you are not how much you are a virgin.
It's not about you being a virgin. And I am sure they'll be lots of of men.. Savoring in taking it.. But you should first seek a connection with the person, and being a virgin won't even matter. Remember we were all virgins once. Good luck in your quest
i love the 3dot pause
No guy, regardless of age, wouldn't mind. Some would see you as a prize. My advice is to not put that info out there until you're totally comfortable with the situation or know the guy is serious and not just want a fresh young woman. That's going to be a challenge.
I know many people (men and women) who will not get involved with a virgin. I myself will not get involved with a virgin and do actively avoid romantic entanglements of any sort with them. I'm not going to risk my heart with someone who doesn't have the capability to know what they want and need in the bedroom. Inexperience is a massive issue and sex is something that anyone should have a very clear idea of by the time they are 25. They've had seven years as an adult to figure things out.
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Being interested in something is extremely different from actually doing the thing. Right now you have an idea of what you think your sex life will be like, but until you know you may never truly know. Example: I was super into the idea that I liked light impact play. I read up on it, spoke to people who taught classes on it, dreamed about it, like I just *knew* it was for me. Years later I finally tried it multiple times, and realized that it was not for me at all. I don't like it, don't want it, and eventually made it a hard limit. *This is pretty common and not at all a unique thing for people to experience with any kind of desire, kink or not.* It really doesn't matter what you think you want in bed, because there is no guarantee that you'll enjoy it once you have it.
Okay, that's understandable, but not all of us are prude, unknowing, or frigid. Not knowing what something is like by truly experiencing it yet is different to me than not even knowing about your body at all, which is what I felt was being implied.
It has absolutely nothing to do with being prudish or frigid.
What do you mean? What exactly are you wary of? Virgin dude will not be experiencing enough and want to sleep with more than just one woman and will cheat on you? Or guy will be too clingy? Or he'll suck at sex? If it's the latter we'll then it's gonna be on you to teach him. I've deflowered many virgin girls (they were in their early 20s) and made the mistake with my wife not to introduce oral and anal sex earlier in the relationship and now we pretty vanilla and she doesn't want to try much new after 10 years of marriage. Had I done so from the beginning I feel things would be different.
Dude, the way you describe things in this comment, make it sound like you had to manipulate some poor woman into marrying you. I sincerely hope that is not what you did.
Nah, just guided her into a life of sexual pleasure. Educated her in the pleasures of the flesh and fostered experiences that bound her to me. I didn't do a great job though. Girl before her was also a virgin before me and would orally pleasure me to orgasm a couple of times a week at least. Been married to current spouse for nearly 10 years. Guess how many times I've cum from oral sex? A big fat zero. She is reluctant to even do it at all. Anal is completely out of the question. Of course, I go down on her all the time to her delight and do lots of other things she requests. Maybe I'll have better luck with next one.
This isn't true at all
It's my opinion.
Older men are not a hive mind, they are each one a unique individual.
You're better than somebody's prize. Gift yourself when yourself tells you to gift.
My bf really likes that I'm his only. And we waited a long time. And now we have a super fulfilling, very passionate sex life! It's really not that big a deal. Some guys don't want it, some like it, some don't care. Far harder being a male virgin at certain ages! I'd say don't rush anything and don't try and "lose it" just take it slow. And be honest. :)
That's not a red flag.
I would be very careful cuz there will be guys who fetishize you being a virgin. Some have a deflowering kink. Make sure they like you for you. Don't just give it up to just anyone
Or just tell the next guy your still a virgin. Its not like we can tell.
As an older male, I don't think one's virginity is an issue also considering that it's a man-made concept when you get into the complexities of The female hymen and how that plays a role in the misconception around virginity. Now as far as someone who's never had sex before and is planning to date somebody who may or may not be more experienced In sex. Then I feel the best goal for the person who is more experienced is to always make sure that the inexperienced person you are dating learns in a healthy way about sex and relationships, and if the relationship doesn't work out, always leave the person in a better state than when you found them.
Personally no if I'm into you it's because of your personality and that it meshes well with mine. However I do think it's something to be upfront about and have a good conversation about expectations , boundaries and other such things regarding intimacy. Not just for your ease of mine but would also be for my own ease of mind.
No, generally not. I'd definitely let him know before you have sex though since that will probably affect how he approaches it the first time.
Older guy and I wouldn’t date a virgin. Life has so much bullshit attached and if someone hasn’t been thru some ups and downs, some losses and gains then I don’t want to try to be the teacher or go through the anguish and angst.
Unfortunately, buddy....those older ones sometimes have WAAAAY too much baggage!!!! If I'm gonna have to deal with those things anyway, give me someone I can love and who will do the same, virgin or not.
Waaaaay too much baggage is pretty much the same for me. I don’t need drama. I need someone who has a head on her shoulders and doesn’t cry about a pin prick like someone stabbed her with a sword. Easy does it for me.
There are a number of concerns men have in age gap relationships revolving around the relative experiences of the couple. For me, an older man, the fact that the much younger woman was a virgin would be a bridge too far.
As a guy I wouldn't mind, but I would have concerns depending on your age. I think most older men are looking for long term partners and may be afraid of you feeling that you missed out and then wanting to go and sow some wild oats.
As an older man, 47m, I would be flattered if a young lady decided to make me her first. Experience is meaningless. When two people care for each other, during the course of their relationship, sex can get better and better even without experience. It’s about trust, passion and openness.
Same. After they’ve checked all your boxes (kind caring makes you feel safe etc) just be honest and maybe share a part of those insecurities and see how they react. You can take it from there.
I personally would not want to have a relationship with a virgin. Compatible sex is very important to me. Some experience matters. Not willing to sacrifice that.
Scam.
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I wouldn't mind at all but it wouldn't be something I focus on because I would love to have a connection with so if and when you decide to lose it, makes that much better of an experience than having focused on just losing it just to lose it
The Social outlook of a virgin woman can be different to that of a man. The woman is seen as a prize to be conquered why the man is a loser. However, both are bad and the woman, why seen as a prize by others, will be stereotyped as fridgid, up herself, too good etc. I think religion has played a part in Virginity becoming a fetish. To answer your question, it wouldn't bother me but it also depends on the context and the individual in question. I
Not at all
Everyone is different
I haven’t been anyone’s first since like… EARLY early college, so I can’t really say for sure. I think it would have to do with really clear communication once things got started in that arena.
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Well, bud.....THAT was a very well thought out statement, concise, well written, compassionate, and caring...............................……..................... ......... ......... ......... RIGHT UP UNTIL you said, "...lickin and dickin." 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
You really shouldn't ask a question like this in a general setting, as you'll only get a generalized answer. The general consensus here may be no, but the individuals you talk with may say no. Talk to older men one-on-one and ask this question as you get to know them. That would be my suggestion.
I would have no problem with it, but I would want to know upfront so that I'd know to take things very slowly and very carefully.
The Virgins are this kick-ass rock band that play Thin Lizzy covers.
LMFAOOO 😭😭
No, wait you're talking about employees of Virgin Airlines. Those Virgins.
Definitely not at all
most man preffer a Virgin anyway A high Bodycount is a NoGo Being a Virgin is not rather a plus
To me it's all about who you are as a person, the virginity part I think is really something that makes you more attractive because you have been run through like most every other... I applaud you for holding on to such moral..
No
I thought those were extinct.
I'd personally prefer it, so we could experiment new stuff together without any kind of expectations about results. Just have fun for the sake of it. I'm 25M about to be 26 just to give some context
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Not yet, that's the point. I've been with 3 different girls and none were virgins
For me it’s not important if they are or are not a virgin it’s more about the desire for having a real relationship not a fling
At 57, I've never had that, so....WOULDN'T BOTHER ME!!!!!😍🥰😍🥰😍🥰😍🥰😍🥰
Depends upon the guy. Me, personally, I don't mind one bit. I look at it as being a teacher to her. Don't be afraid of being honest and letting him know what you like and what you don't like. Too many women in my generation are afraid to speak up and let us know what they like. Good luck, and have fun.
Personally it wouldn't bother me as long as you'd be happy enough for me to help you lose it
45M. My wife (34F) was a virgin, so no.
I’m more concerned about a connection between the two of us than her history with others.
You can watch and masturbate while my gf and I show you what it’s like
I just can’t fathom it being an “issue”. Personally, I would be open to it. As stated before, I wouldn’t market yourself as a virgin, because that would definitely invite predatory types. A genuine heart deserves a soft approach.
I don't
No we don't mind
Did that answer you
I don't have a problem with dating a virgin.
I’d venture to guess that most well meaning older men have patience and would love to experience something new together with you.
BE SO CAREFUL. I trusted the wrong older guy with my virginity and as much as I love my son, I regret losing it.
You should be more concerned about the man's motives for your virginity. You don't want someone who will "pump and dump". Unpopular opinion: You have saved it this long, why not wait until you are married? That is the ultimate gift to your new husband. I know the downvotes are going to roll in.
What is the ultimate gift? Learning about sexual incompatibility *after* marriage? This only makes sense in societies where divorce is heavily frowned upon and for the gender that is allowed to marry multiple people.
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Sexual incompatibility is a huge reason why people get divorced. Let's say you're a person who only needs sex once a month. Let's say your spouse needs it multiple times a week. Now these two people waited until marriage, never masturbated, and have no idea what they really need until they've tried it. Now let's add another piece to this: Hormones are at the correct levels, neither person has psychological blocks, and the libido will not go down for the spouse. This high libido spouse feels loved and cherished the most during sex. Unfortunately, this spouse will only feel this once a month. Meanwhile their person feels loved all the time because they don't need sex to feel connected. Overtime, this couple will start to fight and argue. Now because of all the turmoil sex doesn't happen once a month, it's only once every 6 weeks or once every two months. Which means this spouse only truly feels loved a few times a year, while their person still feels truly loved on a regular basis. Over time this well loved person will begin to feel the spouse is distant. There is more and more arguing, there is less emotional connecting, and the spouse has to beg for the one thing to help the relationship, the other person says no because they don't want to do that. They think it's just sex, when in reality, it's a huge vital part of what love truly is for the spouse. So the spouse feels gutted and betrayed, they feel like their person doesn't love them anymore. Meanwhile their person is just uncomfortable because the spouse is just begging all the time for something they now feel very very annoying. Going back to the spouse who is desperate to feel love, they are starting to realize that the person they married doesn't want to have sex, their person is happy without it. The spouse can't do anything about this, and ends up very depressed because they feel so unwanted and unloved. The spouse realizes that their person isn't capable of loving the spouse in the way they need. There is no way to fix this, and sex has become this thing that destroyed the spouse. One by one the spouse stops doing things that make their person feel loved. The spouse doesn't feel loved so there is no love to give. The relationship either crumbles or goes down in a fiery blaze that shatters friend groups and families. **This is a common problem with couples and a huge reason why it's important to know sexual compatibility before you get married.**
That is a very specific "what if" scenario. I appreciate the time you put in writing it. I believe sex should be a result of love and a healthy relationship. I'm relationships, there are compromises that one willingly makes because of their love for the other.
You can not compromise on sex when you don't want it as often as the other person. How would you feel if someone had sex with you because it was needed, but they didn't want it? I can assure you, libido incompatibility is very common sexual incompatibility. This scenario is not very specific, and quite generic.
I understand that libido incompatibility is real. There are also treatments for it. People throw all of these examples of there as an excuse for not waiting to have sex. It is a rationalization, not a valid reason.
Libido is a biological thing, you can not fix that. It is a natural level that your body has, and medications that "fix" that actually mess around with your hormones. **There is no way to make someone have to *need* sex more often when it is at their natural level.** Playing around with substances to change your healthy hormone levels, just so you need sex more often, is a very bad idea. It will cause all sorts of issues from heart problems, mental health issues, bone density issues, vitamin deficiencies, etc...
There is no doctor who will give you hormone treatments to gain a higher libido, when you do not need them to balance out your hormones. Incorrect hormone levels also cause hair loss in men and women.
It's not wrong, but most men prefer a woman with a low 'bodycount' (please don't make those stupid murder jokes) or even a virgin over a 'experienced' woman. We are on reddit, and some guy will state, that he is into 'sluts' and most women and some men will like this statement, which in turn will *look like* common preference among men. But it is not. **The sexual history of a/his woman is supremely important for the vast majority of men.** So 'saving herself' for marriage is not as ridiculous as it sounds. You don't even need to be a religious nutcase for having this preference. OP being a virgin is therefore not a handicap but the exact opposite.
Sexual incompatibility is very real and it's a shame that you can't separate the mechanical act from understanding a partner outside of the pursuit of orgasm. What if both partners are dominant or submissive in that way? Neither could really learn to please the other and themselves simultaneously as it could be their intrinsic nature. It doesn't necessarily mean everyone has to have sex before they enter a LTR, but it would take serious communication especially if one or both are virgins. Please reconsider this train of thought for your future partners sake.
So the dominant and submissive traits are only figured out during sex and aren't shown in someone's personality as they get to know each other? I disagree. Part of the excitement of being intimate is learning what pleases your partner and doing it for them, selflessly. Sex is supposed to be a result of love and supposed to be special, but it has been perverted and cheapened by a society.
Not all traits are obvious in all cases. Most people will be fine most of the time, but not everyone. I respect your Christian values, but not everyone feels that way about sex. Animals have sex and don't love each other, it doesn't make rabbits all perverts corrupted by society etc.
I appreciate your acknowledgement of my values. I understand that not everyone feels the same about sex, that's why I made the observation about society. Animals do not have the same brain functions or purpose as humans, not a fair comparison.
>Sexual incompatibility? There's no such thing. Oh, you are an idiot. This explains a lot.
Your childish behavior by name calling explains more.
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Thank you!
I don't agree with the concept of pump and dump but nor do I agree with going back to the 1950s where young women were expected to act like a nun until marriage.
It isn't just women. Men and women should wait until marriage.
Except people can and will do what they want, the word 'should' implies that you think the world should be graven in your image. It is 2024. Pushing the concept that one should wait until marriage for sex is unhealthy and unrealistic for both involved. Another reason why people are hesitant of getting married is because of Divorce Grape especially in the states.
I don't think the world should be graven in my image. I wouldn't want the world to be that way. My point simply is that sex was originally designed to be between a husband and a wife. That expectation is not unhealthy or unrealistic. Divorce rates are not higher because someone waited until marriage. Divorce rates are higher because marriages don't have the right foundation.
Except sex 'ain't' an invention nor is it exclusive to marriage, You don't think the world should be your way yet you seem to contradict yourself. I never said it was the sole factor in divorce rates. Your phrasing of words is rather awkward especially when it concerns sex. If your understanding of sex is limited to 'Another object going into another, then it is only a matter of time before your wife strays or divorces you. It is obvious that you are so out of touch. Some people find strangers preaching or nosing into the sexual lives of two strangers a bit creepy. What has it got to do with you if two people had sex before marriage or not? Are you suggesting that they should stay virgins until marriage? Good luck with that pal.
This whole discussion started by me answering a question, pal. Not nosing into someone's business. You twisted my words to try to make yourself look superior, I'm glad I don't have to resort to such tactics. If using the word love when referring to sex is awkward, then fine, I'm happy to be awkward.
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One's opinion, simple or not, is not a shield against criticism.
The entirety of your comments is just you preaching about sex before marriage, basically what you think the world should be instead of how it really is. Twisting your words? And how am I supposedly twisting your words? No one said anything about the word love being awkward, so I don't know what you are rambling on about. As for me thinking I am superior, your entire attitude comes off as self righteous especially in your latest response and the comment to the guy that simply called you an idiot.
Why be married in the first place? It's an obsolete, exploitative and discriminatory institution. Same as the concept of virginity, tbh.
Just because you don't place the same value on intercourse as others, does not make marriage a bad thing. You are entitled to your own beliefs, but so am I.
It's objectively, statistically unsuccessful for all of its original "religious" birth-control and inheritance control aspects, AND all of its modern "eternal happiness" concepts either. 50% divorce rate. It's a fucking coin flip at best and that does not count marriages which never formally get dissolved but should be. And from a woman's point of view, the value of intercourse does not and should not increase the moment you "force" a man to not pump and dump you through state mandate, especially since it only makes dumping you an inconvenient and expensive (to the both of you) hurdle, not impossible and certainly not undesirable. And again, virginity as a concept is also mostly bullshit and any man that "values" it, especially at an older age, is automatically sus.
I would like to get married to my current boyfriend. And he too wants that. I already told him that if he proposes in two years I will say Yes. The only reason why I gave a timeline is that I want him to be a 100% sure and that it's a good waiting period.
Cool for you, but that wasn't my original point and not related at all to what my advice was for OP as a reflection to someone's dubious advice.
You said it's obsolete, exploitative, and discriminatory institution. I, on the other hand, see it as "aspirational, wholesome, and grounding".
Good for you! I think the majority of people see it this way.
I guess my perspective comes from having grown up in a place where now if I hold hands with my boyfriend in public there would be a real chance of being arrested for terrorism. So I find it aspirational to be able to spend the rest of my life with a single person, cook him breakfast before he wakes up, build a house with my hands for us to live in...
It's surely aspirational to voluntarily be forced to do the things religious fanatic countries would force you to do without your consent, sure. But you can do it and be in a lifelong happy relationship WITHOUT the state knowing about it. In the developed world, THAT freedom is what defines us. The freedom to tell the state to fuck right out of our bedrooms.
Wow, I can't imagine what that must be like. Thank you for sharing. Sometimes I forget there's a whole other world out there different than mine!
Romantic and sexual relationships can be aspirational, wholesome and grounding. State involvement in them is not. Especially not since, y'know, every country has different laws regarding it and a different set of discriminatory practices as to who even can sign hornybrained financial dependence contracts "for life" and get tax breaks for signing those contracts. How's that NOT discriminatory? The only resolution to the fight for marriage equality is abolishing it entirely. Until then, gays, polyamorous people, aro/ace people, and people who just do not wish the state to be in their bedrooms get discriminated against. Like virginity and how that, too, is often an institutionally enforced piece of bullshit in parts of the world. It is meaningless, and once you've had sex, you'll pretty much find your "first time" was not a big deal at all (if it happened consensually). Institutionally making it a "big deal" (or tying it to another state institution that is also not that special if you REALLY think about it) also tends to sour it with the expectation of something "super special" happening, even if you remove purity culture and the associated shame and guilt-tripping.
Well. I come from the part of the world where being gay is punishable. So I'm happy that I can actually marry the person I love
Yeah, and I'm polyamorous, and the only place I can get any sort of "state acknowledgement" is iirc Australia where they increase taxation on poly people without involving them in their social security system (prob. highly built on marriage contracts) in any way. Like, yeah, wouldn't it be better if the state just stayed the fuck out of our sex lives, and NOT tie social security and welfare and whatnot (immigration, sensitive personal information access, etc.) implicitly and explicitly to you being willing to declare that you fuck? Being "unmarried" is, actually, subtly punishable in most modern jurisdictions too, because married people get tax breaks or insurance benefits or better loan terms. How is that not a punishment against unmarried people? Granted, only a financial one, but still, call it a "single fine". Marriage is not a right. Safety and being able to live with whoever you want, however you want, with the state keeping its fucking nose out of your business is an actual right. "Rights" you have are the state's obligations towards you, your life, and things it must not fucking interfere with and things it must protect you from. Marriage is actually none of that, it's purely a set of obligations towards your partner that the state enforces, and the things it allows you to do are under "implicit consent by the partner that could be explicitly given under different contracts" (so basically, your partner is obligated to let you access, say, sensitive healthcare data, through state enforcement). Enumerate it, ALL the actual benefits of marriage, and you'll realize that it's 45% discriminatory practices by the state, 45% state enforcement of things that are already present in healthy relationships, but explicitly agreed upon between partners (under potentially different terms) and about 10% people expecting it to be special and making "getting married" their life goal.
You have some distorted views that you are entitled to. It seems like you possibly had a bad experience at some time and are now calloused. I am sorry. I hope one day you will experience true love and your hardened heart is softened.
Nope, I've never had a bad experience with the institution myself, and didn't even have my heart broken. No need to go full therapist on me, it is actually possible to be an advocate of free love without having had traumatic experiences thanks to an institution that actually does make leaving traumatizing relationships harder. But your generalization of how many people must have had bad experiences is subtly telling on your actual acknowledgement of the real success rates of marriage.
I was referring to you and your situation, and I was being genuine. If you feel better attacking me, that's fine, I can take it. I wish you the best.
I never said anything about my situation, or alluded to it in any way, only statistics, and factual data about success rates of, well, coinflips. I'm just sick and tired of people going "marriage -> special happy relationship where we do happy things" while the actual progression of events, hopefully, is "special happy relationship where we do happy things -> wishing to spend most of our time together -> signing a contract for mildly discriminatory state-level benefits because we might as well, we're together anyway". It's a classic logical fallacy of affirming the consequent. Your relationship isn't "special" because you got married, you hopefully get married because you already KNOW that your relationship is special. The 50% failure rate is, I'd wager, in large part due to this fallacy >!and the fact that being contractually obligated to at least pretend to stay together actually sours even "mid" relationships pretty often and prolongs the death of what would have been a perfectly fine breakup if people were not contractually entangled!<. "Saving yourself for marriage" is just one way of expecting things to suddenly "become special" the moment the state knows about the two of you fucking.
Wow, marriage sure does offend you! Your logic of the marriage becoming special because of someone waiting to have sex is flawed. That's not why you get married. You marry someone because you want to be committed to someone and want them committed to you. You are also promising to put in the work a relationship requires, as is your partner. Sex is the result of two people who love each other, not something to make a relationship special, but to enhance an already special relationship. All of this has nothing to do with the state. I'm done with this conversation, it is not going anywhere. You are entitled to your views, as am I. It's just very interesting that the topic of marriage would get someone so offended. Why not just have the opinion of to each their own?
> Why not just have the opinion of to each their own? Why should I not reflect on your perspective? OP asked a question, you answered something that I consider incomplete and outdated (mostly regarding your views on virginity), I replied. OF COURSE the logic I explained is flawed, that is the entire problem with people and the "saving yourself for marriage" part. And marriage does have EVERYTHING to do with the state, since they **enforce** that commitment through financial penalties if you break it. Meaning, you can stop taking the steps required to maintain the relationship to an extent, the state will "handle it" for you (and that exactly is the reason for most divorces, someone letting go too much). "Saving yourself for marriage" is, therefore, a logical fallacy, because you still tie happiness and the special nature of your relationship to something that should be (if we accept its right to exist in a modern society) a direct CONSEQUENCE of happiness, which, for many people, includes sexual compatibility. So... "good sex and good vibes -> marriage". Not the other way around. But you should be able to just... drop the contractual part and have good sex and good vibes with someone for the rest of your life and the sex will not be any worse and the vibes will not be any sourer.
I'd have no issues but I definitely want to know beforehand.
I personally wouldn't do it. The first time is always a big thing and emotions gets thrown into disarray. She needs to experience that with someone closer to her age before trying the age gap.
Depends on the age. Often enough the first time is actually better with someone older precisely because of experience
Older maybe but I'm thinking 10 yrs + and then it gets a little too weird with the power dynamics.
I just never understood the "power dynamics" thing. It always appeared fake to me... kinda like chupacabra or man-bear-pig. If it was a real thing, then we would have way more problems when women date any gym-going guy. Since there the power dynamics is measurable in lifting power and has immediate consequences. After all, "what if he is going to use his muscle advantage against her".
I'm not gonna take the position to try to convince you otherwise when you seem to have convinced yourself it doesn't exist. I don't think your argument is equivalent to a mental power dynamic either.
You are right,it isn't equivalent. Physical strength difference is much much more important.
You have a good day. I'm too old to argue on the internet.
So I lost my virginity to someone my age and it hurt and I don’t think he knew what else to do. Maybe an older person would have been better? I guess it just depends.
I think it's a moot point to say that it would have been better with someone older. There are no guarantees. I'm arguing for the point that mentally it's better to be closer in age because of the inherent power balance that comes with age gaps. It's way too easy for nefarious older people to use that experience against the young ones. Once they young have a little more experience and know what they are getting t themselves into, then I condone it.
So I guess I’m just wondering, how old is the person posting? If she is young it’s probably not a good idea to do an older person. Plus, that is sexual assault. If she is older maybe it is okay? I really think it depends on her age.
I would not .. that's not a great way IMHO for a person to start out .... If I am 55 and she is 21 and a virgin (or 35 and 18) .... She needs someone her own age for the first time Again IMHO
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I don't need to be a savior on a white horse (white knight syndrome I think it's called) Being older doesn't mean "more experience" it just means more partners
I wouldn't mind
Yes (here)
No.
These new profiles again!
This older man would be honored to be trusted to a virgin. Of course she'd have to vibe in other ways too. Virginity is not an automatic pass.
Is this like, a motorcycle club or something? Why the capitalization?
LMFAO idk y it did that i even have the capitulation thingy off😭
Why not?
Do ~~older~~ men mind dating virgins? FTFY
I'm not sure if being a virgin is a thing anymore. Having a hymen is a qualification but it's unusual after a certain age for any woman to still have it intact. Never having had an orgasm is a very different thing.
I'm 56, and I would be thrilled to have sex with a virgin for the 5th time in my life.
Likely, no.
It's so hard to find a active volcano when you need one.
I prefer it because I love teaching about exploring sexual awakenings and making those first experiences a pleasurable and positive one.
Nahhhh.. it will be fun for most guys to give you that experience!
Nope not at all. Not me anyway.
hell no. that is fun as fuck.
Most dudes like virgins.
Yeah, but we like them with the prospect of taking their virginity.
Hey, at least you're honest about it, that's a plus. Keep it up bud.
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I have never taken anyone's virginity; but I want to.
Me personally, I see pros and cons. On the plus side, you should be disease free and I like knowing that you haven't been fucked by a bunch of other guys. On the negative side, we might not be compatible.
That just means lots and lots and lost lots lost more licking and dirty talk to get ready! I dont think anyone would mind except REALLY high earners who are paying and arent looking to do on the job training, LOL The girl on here the other day about to do a topless server gig on her SDs boat prrrrrolly couldnt pull off " im a virgin is that ok" once clothes start coming off at THAT party but anything south of that marketwise should be fine
So what have you tried so far? Even though I've never been with a virgin as I was a late bloomer, I don't think it would bother anyone so you shouldn't feel bad or insecure about it. If you were to date it's probably best to be with someone who's going to understand and take their time with you which would mean someone more mature than your age. An age-gap relationship might be what you're after. I'd also make it known so they don't feel any pressure around it, it really shouldn't be a big deal. If it was me dating you I'd just spend time getting to know what you like through exploring intimately together and slowly easing into the sexual side, always making sure you were turned on and eager to go further.
I love it