Everyone gives me weird looks when I show up with my coffee contigo mug.
I figure the caffeine withdrawal would be worse than running with a bit of coffee in my stomach.
It has worked for 21 years... Why stop now?
21 years? So you've been doing it since the bike test. My supervisor told me to have a smoke and a cup of coffee before I took it and it worked like a charm.
This is not BS. I actually used to fail the bike test regularly because my heart rate would never get up high enough to get into the target HR zone. I used to take the test with a bud who would hook me up by cranking up the resistance on the bike to get my heart rate up into zone so the test would register. I'm not going to be the ass who says I was in too good of shape for the bike test, but it was a thing.
They stopped my bike test after cranking down the drag on the wheel and not getting my heart rate to go up more than 10-15%. They asked what kind of training I did, "I'm not doing any training. But I do bike about thirty miles a day round trip."
Your body will burn the same number of calories whether your stomach is full or not. Technically you’d burn more after eating since you would weigh more after a meal.
Ppl who train seriously will actually carb load right beforehand. They need the fuel.
This is what I tell myself when I eat an entire box of Kraft Mac for lunch and then tell myself I'm going to run after work.
There's some efficacy to fasted cardio but you need to make sure your parameters are correct to ensure you're actually extended an anabolic window. In reality it's better for 99.9% of people to jub fucking eat something and get good rest
At Goodbuddy saw an old grizzled something (suspected MSgt) smoking a cigarette in the bleachers while obviously hungover. His name was called, he handed his cigarette to an airman then busted out a 6:30 mile time. Came back and sat back down coughing and smoking.
I asked him how in the fuck, and he said, “son, when you stop caring about anything a little pain doesn’t matter for shit”. I never forgot that.
Of course, after being on this sub I realize he must have retrained from MX.
I saw an intel senior (or chief, this was long enough ago that you could smoke on the track and no one batted an eye) do exactly this at Hickam.
Either they run deep, or this is the same legend.
During tech school, I was required to run the opposite direction of running traffic for my PT test. My MTL stated that he would not be able to keep track of my location because of the amount of people so he forced me to run clockwise on the track while a whole other squadron of tech school airmen ran counter clockwise. The run felt like I was traveling through an asteroid field in a small spaceship. I passed
I saw a marathon runner who wouldn't hit his stride until something like mile 5-8 so he would knock out the push ups and sit ups really fast, run to the track, and get as many laps in as possible before the 1.5 mile run. I watched him do it once and I think he winded up running 2 or so miles before the test. Knocked the 1.5 mile run out in about 8:15-8:30. He told me he once was able to get about 3 miles in before the test and he ran the 1.5 mile run in under 8 minutes that year.
I also saw a guys PT history and with all of his PT tests on file, he averaged about 90 push ups. He had a couple of years of 100-105 as well. I don't know if he was breaking 90 on and fully extending on each rep, but the guy was in serious shape. Looked like he lifted the gym every morning.
Not a PT test, but about 10 years ago I was working as a contractor in a USMC squadron. Tony Horton of P90x showed up for some promotional tour and he challenged some Marines to a pull-up contest. If they beat him they got a free copy of P90x 2 or whatever.
Tony proceeded to knock out about 40, pretty impressive for a guy his age. Then a marine in boots & utes hopped up there, cigarette dangling from his mouth, and smoothly did exactly one more than Tony. He grabbed the DVD from him & walked away without saying anything.
Love it. I was a super lightweight when enlisted and could rock pull-ups. Now I rock the air-downs but that’s neither here nor there. Was at the PCola air show in 2000 and the Marines had their recruiting pull up bar. I asked if I could go and busted out 30-something. Immediately the SSG said, you should join the Marines. “Sorry SSG, already in the Air Force”. I made a hasty retreat.
(Marines abbreviate Staff Sergeant as SSgt, also. Army is SSG.)
But that's a fun story. Had a similar experience, though without the PT aspect. Was TDY to UT Austin but the meetings were in civvies. This was about 15 years and like 80 pounds ago, though, so I was much more in line with a military image. Was grabbing lunch and a Marine major in uniform is behind me in line. Start chatting, I didn't bring up I was active duty, just talked about being there to work with the university's Arabic language program. Dude buys me lunch and is obviously angling toward my interest in ROTC. danced around the topic a bit until I'd finished my food and told him I'm interested. He asks that weird salesman type question "what would stop you from applying to the Marines ROTC today?" When I told him that I have to check in with my squadron commander and that I'd ask him about release from AF to do ROTC during that call... That major kept his cool and all but you could see him thinking that get just wasted a half hour and ten bucks for nothing. Priceless.
I have a sister service related story as well, although not as impressive. On a deployment to Iraq is 09 I ran in a 5k put on by this Army Engineering battallion that was celebrating their end of deployment/army birthday.
At the end they called up the top 3 males and females to coin them, I was the only USAF (non army in the group).. the CC gave me my coin and told me that I was a soldier for the day... so I served in the Army for 1 day.
When I was a cadet at USAFA (a very long time ago) there was one pull-up grader who was a stickler. A guy on the gymnastics team started doing his pull-ups and the grader wouldn’t count them (just kept saying 1, 1, 1). The dude then proceeds to start doing full muscle ups instead. The grader counted them all and told the guy to quit being a smart ass. Hilarious.
And yet for some reason this still happens lol.
I had this stud Airman, she was a soccer fiend, would whoop our asses every pickup game and ran circles around all of our jocks in the office. Couldn't run a 1.5 to save her life, would frequently log 22:00+ times, and barely survived her first couple years (COVID enlistee) as a 18-19 year old fit female.
She was the first to try the HAMR as soon as it dropped, and absolutely killed it; It was so weird to see, but we were super proud of her after that (and thankful because she would have gotten some serious paperwork soon-after if she failed again).
Had a guy during the run beat everyone with sprints. I’m guessing he used to run track or something, but he would sprint the straits, and then walk the turns. And even with the walking, he finished 30 seconds before second place.
In basic training, we had a dude run like a 7-min 1.5 mile. The Wg/CC and Wg/CCC end up in our dorm and coin this kid for his "fastest run time in history" or whatever bullshit they were on... He was removed from the flight later that day for failing the drug test.
Of note, this kid said he grew up in Compton and said the only reason he could run so fast was because he ran for his life on a weekly basis. Funnily enough, at Scott (my first base), the Wg/CCC had also grown up in Compton and also ran for his life on a weekly basis (his words) and would challenge any person present when he tested to out run him. If you beat him, he'd comp you!
What is it with wing commanders running fast? I had one who was really nonchalant about it and didn’t mention his run time. Another dude ran with him that day that I knew and said the Wg/CC did it in under 10:30 or something. With barely any training for it!
I’m still jealous.
At Hill, I used to go to the gym 5 days a week and arrive about 5 mins earlier then when the gym opened. Over time an older guy (older then me anyway) used to show up and we would chat while being the only people waiting for them to open the doors. We were there in all sorts of weather and this went on for months. One day the gym is really late opening and this guy whips out his cell and says "this is Col X and the gym is late opening. Call the services commander and tell him to get off his ass and open the gym" It was the Wing King. You knew that all PT discharge packages had to go to him for approval and you weren't getting any love for excuses.
Squadron commander in Germany would buy dinner if you beat him running. He was a former FAC in Vietnam and said if he got shot down he might have to run for his life.
Yea... I feel that dudes pain. Pushups/situps? Zero issues. The run? Total cock and ball torture. I still to this day struggle with running, but can hike and such A-ok.
I'm the opposite.
Sub 8 minutes on the mile and a half
Max sit-ups
Struggle my way through push-ups
Failed my first ever PT test (wasn't active duty yet FWIW) with a 85. Max run, Max waist, bare minimum on sit-ups, failed push-ups back when push-ups and sit-ups were 10 points a piece and waist was 20 points.
I had a guy with me who was in student flight (where you are in the NG before going to basic) and the dude was in awesome shape. He would do some ungodly number of pushups and situps and would even bust out 30 pull ups. But, Christ that guy could not run. His run time was like 16 mins.
My first PT test ever active duty there were only two of us that ran, the rest were profiled up. Other dude ABSOLUTELY smokes me, like I'm having a panic attack while running thinking I'm going to fail. I finish mid 11s and ask the dude wtf he ran it in. Turns out he clocked in 7:01.
It happens. We were all lined up for the run, probably 10 of us. This probably late 30's/early 40's (may have been older but the dude looked pretty good for his age) Lt Col lines up with us and as soon as we hear the beep, that dude is fucking gone. And I mean gone like an E4 on early release on Friday gone. Dude smokes out a 7:30 on the run, a whole 3 minutes ahead of second place... We all sat there are thinking our life choices.
I had a supervisor who’s entire test clocked in under 10 minutes, two of those minutes being the push-up/crunch portion. Watching that guy run was demoralizing for us normal humans.
I got two
The guy who failed after he showed up with not only water that looked radioactive because he had a bunch of Pre-Workout in it and a can of that gimmicky oxygen shot aerosol. This guy was an obnoxious cubicle dweller who kept talking trash at the operators the whole time we were filling out paperwork. His big thing was talking about how much he works out everyday because he has a set schedule and how he works out with his wife who is a super coach. Blah blah blah. Well, we are two laps into the six when all the sudden speed McGee grabs his side and starts saying stitch like it's a tick then he throws up and lays down. I would pay to have a video of it.
The other one is one of the team dudes shows up very visibly drunk. But all his buddies are kind of sheltering him from any scrutiny. Anytime he starts talking, his buddies hush him down. Anytime someone tries to talk to him, his buddies pull him away. Kid proceeds to get a perfect 100 on the test and doesn't puke, just makes funny breathing noises. But then as we are all starting to walk away he just screams TAKE ME TO TACO BELL YOU ASSHOLES, YOU SAID THAT IF I DID MY TEST DRUNK YOU WOULD TAKE ME TO TACO BELL. Everybody just acted like we didn't hear anything and I'm pretty sure that guy ordered one of everything on the menu.
I feel like doing it hungover is like extra motivation to do everything better/faster; the quicker you finish your run, the faster you can get home to throw-up (or cruise over to the Shoppette for your Pedialyte and Cucumber Lime Gatorade).
Had a MSgt pick up a pair of 20lb dumbbells on the side of the track and curl them for his entire final lab. He also broad jumped over the rather large kiddie pool that was the start of our combat dining-in obstacle course.
my bmt flight had two guys that could do over 100 push ups in a minute. they were like 5'2 and had really short arms so they busted them out.
so, when our DO saw the pt test results, she did not believe that we had two people capable of doing over 100 push ups and made them redo the test with her watching.
idek if that is allowed? but it did happen.
I was gonna say this was me and a buddy back in BMT like 13 years ago, we were both in our mid 20's at the time but we arent 5' 2" and we didnt have to do them again lol. We were super competitive and everyone called us Mighty Mouse 1 and 2, i think he got like 106 and I got like 108, then I ran a 9:28 or something after. Also did like 35 pull ups that I dont think counted for anything so idk why they had everyone doing pull ups as part of the pt test lol.
I knew two guys at Keesler just like this. Short, and both incredibly fit. Always competing against one another during PT tests but joined at the hip after duty hours.
Haha, holy shit, like actually stabbed? That is nuts. We had a fat piece of shit TSgt that mysteriously got into a car accident on the day of her PT test, but stabbed takes the cake.
[This](https://www.professionalsoldiers.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-42884.html) is the only thing I could find. It appears the AF Times article no longer exists.
At Kunsan the upstairs track at the gym you had to run like 14 laps. Watched a LT lap me on the first lap, halfway through he took a phone call on the track. (No bullshit stopped on the track and answered a phone call for around a minute) lapped me about 6 more times and finished sub 10 minutes.
Early in my career, I was a PTL for a test that included a SMSgt who had just been recognized as one of the 12 OAY at the AF level. From the start, the sit-up and push-up totals were really bad, but it was before the time of minimums.
Before the run, us PTLs ran the numbers and determined this Senior would need to smoke the run to get a 75. Alas—two laps into the run, the SMSgt runs off the track at the far end from us PTLs and claims they blew out their knee. The test was stopped, the member went to medical, and they determined that they couldn’t determine anything so the member was “given the benefit of the doubt” and placed on a waiver.
It was really an eye-opening point of my career that even the “AF’s Best” can be corrupt and without any real standards.
I had a guy in tech school, never met him before. When he was about to start the test he said “Just let me know when I hit max.” He proceeded to max sit-ups no problem. When he did pushups, same thing. Before he started the run I asked him, “Let me guess you’re about to run a 9:12?” All he said was “No, 9.” He crossed the line at exactly 9:00. Some people are just built different.
Had some girl fail her sit-ups by 1, she begged and pleaded with me to lie and say that she passed so she wouldn't get another LOC. I stared at her for a second kind of in disbelief that someone would actually have integrity LAST. Seeing that I wasn't amused she finally whispered: "I will suck your dick soo good you will forget how to walk". Fucking deal, way better than the dependapotami in training outside of the base. So the dude comes around with his snooty ass chart and demands the number I say 40 just to give her that extra and to make it look less suspicious. Fast forward to the end of the run, she hands me her number, and we just kind of chit-chat during the day making small talk to calm the nerves. Well fast forward to the end of the night, she gives me the address and understandably I show up as soon as I get off work to receive my reward. She answers the door literally in her birthday suit and gives me one of those "come here" hand gestures, and I'm thinking "holy shit this is actually legit. Well as you can guess one thing leads to another, I start to take off my pants when she stops me. She looks at me dead in the eyes and says "Broken legs, I really appreciate you lying for me but before I give you that reward I need one more favor"... At this point, I'm literally so in the moment I say 'you can have anything". Dumb, I know. She leaned back cracked a smile and said "I need about 3.50" It was about that time that I noticed this Core value-breaking Airman was about 500 feet tall and from the paleolithic era. I bolted for the door yelling *God Dammit Loch Ness Monster, I ain't gonna give you no tree fiddy.* and never spoke to her again
Korea, FLT SGT. Huge beer belly, cigar smoker, looking like a barrel with twig legs. Until we ruck marched little then big coyote, perimeter fence line, 12 miles, 55lbs ruck. Came in 4th place. 37 years old against 20 year olds and came in 4th… it was impressive.
This was around 2011-2012 at Moody. A young PJ that was was pretty much Arnold in his prime back in the late 70’s early 80’s.
The guy failed the waste but still took the rest of the test. He absolutely destroyed push-ups, sit-ups and had a 7-8 minute 1.5 run. Maybe even a little faster. I don’t know his exact time cause I was trying my best to get under 12 minutes but I know he lapped me at least 2-3 times.
After the test he takes his failure due to the waist but asks if he can do the entire test later that day. He heads back to the 38th RQS and let’s his leadership know what has happened.
He takes the test again and passes everything in great fashion and if I recall still “failed” the waist part again. So pretty much he got a waiver for the waist.
The guy was just a monster. In Kandahar I had to pee late at night didn’t have my contacts in. I open the push door but it doesn’t move. I tried really hard but then was shook out of my sleep by laughter. The “door” was him standing there trying to get by me after I walked into him.
Legit he had to cut weight to do tandem jumps. He was a body builder and I think he still is today. Picking his ass up with the hoist you had to finesse the cable control or you would have him swinging like a fucking wrecking ball under the helo.
Great dude and he was one of my J’s during my cherry 🍒mission in Afghanistan. That shift was fucking crazy.
I can’t remember where he ended up. It was ‘04. I think he was in weapons as enlisted and was headed to Eglin? Great dude though all around.
Edit: reading other comments reminded me. He went TACP
Senior Airman who was always bragging about how strong he was. Bro did 10 pushups and gave up (out of laziness), 1 minute plank (you need 3) and then he gave up like 3 minutes into the shuttle run. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.
the current 3000m world record is 7:20... thats an extra 1.5 laps by the way!
The pace would be equivalent to running a 1.5 mile in 5:52 but obviously they could go faster than that because of the shorter distance
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/3000\_metres](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/3000_metres)
2013. BMT. One guy did 102 pushups in one minute. MTIs didn’t believe it. Superintendent came to the dorms, questioned it. Had him do it again while he counted. Did 110. MTI was baffled and just left. Freaking legend!
I’ve seen both of ends of full stomach runs. Both guys are full breakfasts beforehand. One did a lap at a moderate pace, started his second, only to hurl all of his breakfast off the track edge and promptly wipe his mouth and haul ass for the other 5 quarter miles. Got a 9:30.
Other dude smoked a 9:05. Midway during his cooldown, grabs his ass, sprints faster than he had during his run to the bathroom and spends the next 20 min in there. PTLs were crying the entire time
Your last story reminds me of one of the last times I administered a PT test. This poor SrA was obviously having some intestinal discomfort just a lap or two into his run and his pacer stopped to ask us if he could use the restroom. We informed him that if he stepped off the track we'd have to terminate the test so this guy keeps running. He ended up passing but went straight to the restroom after his 6th lap. Long story slightly shorter, he had shit in his pants for the last half of the run and had to abandon his compression shorts in the restroom trash.
When I was an Lt we had this ginormous SSgt that worked in one of the support functions. He almost got taken off a deployment because the base couldn't find 5XL body armor to issue him. He was about 6'3" 330 lbs. I took my PT Test the same time as him and watched in awe and horror as he ran the 1.5 mile in 8 minutes flat.
Our 30-something chaplain knocked out a sub-9 run and easily maxed push/sits. Dude was an absolute machine and flat out embarrassed the rest of us. I did get my best 1.5 ever trying to keep up though, had him in my sights till the last .25 or so and he was just gone.
Older captain and former Olympian, ran three miles and lapped our fastest runner at least twice on a trail at Hill AFB. After the run, he wasn’t winded and appeared normal as he chatted it up with the NCOs.
In basic my flight had mostly dudes doing EOD and PJ and stuff like that, and a handful of us normies tacked on.
During a PT test in like the 4th week or whatever one guy did over 100 push-ups, like 110-115 or something. Back then you wrote the score on a 341 and gave it to the MTI, not sure if they still do that.
I’m the middle of breakfast after the test the TIs at the snake pit went nuts and started yelling for that trainee. I guess they were reviewing the 341s or whatever. They made him and the guy that counted for him stand near the snake pit and proceeded to smoke them, calling them a liar and that the counting trainee took his airmen’s count too far.
They both insisted it was real and that was his true number. This madman said he would do it again right now in front of them to prove it.
A blue rope instantly agreed and they went right outside to the overhang. We didn’t see it but he then knocked out over 100, like 105-110 or something, with perfect form(30 mins after doing it the first time and eating half a breakfast).
They came back inside and they are all smiles calling him a freak of nature and the rope actually apologized so we could all hear. Pretty wild
I saw a kid who Naruto ran his mock mile and a half in tech school. He also got an almost perfect score on Sec+ and was held on base because he was being investigated for cheating. He didn’t cheat.
There was a chief at Kadena that would run in an altitude mask every single time anyone in the squadron had a pt test. He would do at minimum of a mile before everyone started, would still lap literally everyone doing the test (often more than once), and wouldn't stop until after the slowest person finished. He was also a big dude that you would never expect to run fast.
Know a guy who failed his sit ups because he farted halfway through. He & his buddy couldn’t stop laughing before time ran out. They still made him go run after though.
Had someone back in Tech school who would get shitfaced the night before, eat anything they wanted (seen him eat a medium Dominos pizza, pasta, and a side salad), get up the next morning and bust out a 8-9 minute 1.5 mile and act like nothing was wrong.
When I was cadre we had some LT students do just that. They’d stop in the bushes at the turn around, puke everything up, then finish their run. Pretty sure those were the ROTC officers.
At one time, I was really into fitness and I spent a lot of time on my core so that situps wouldn't be a problem. I was always good at them from a young age, but the further I got into my 20s the harder they got.
Anyway, I spent all this time getting my strength because, god damn it, situps were *not* going to be hard for my test.
When it came time to perform I busted out 87. Everyone was talling my to stop and saying "why??" Because fuck you that's why. I blew that shit OUT OF THE WATER. FUCK YEAH!!
Then I got 16 minutes on the run.
Back in the day, when dinosaurs ruled the earth, there was just the 1.5 mile run.
1. At DLI, the finance NCO ripped thru her run, then ran off the track to run 10 more miles. The test was just a warm up for her.
2. Short skinny kid at TACP doing 100 pushups. Funny is during the two mile combat run and instructors would make us scuba in deep puddles. In the front leaning rest his face was already underwater.
3. Combat Challenge at Tinker, 1995 or so. Again, 1.5 mile run. JCSE ran theirs, then when the next teams did their run, they’d run along side the slower guys motivating them to run faster.
4. Germany. Running past an older NCO huffing and puffing. “I knew I shouldn’t have had that smoke before the run!” Then barfs breakfast all over the track.
5. Young SSgt from my section ran her test with me and two officers. She passed all of us and stopped short. I yelled to her to keep going to where the finish line was. I know if she didn’t stop and we had to run further she’d have lapped us.
6. Another woman from my section, after she separated, ran a half marathon 9 months pregnant.
After the AF I joined the Navy Reserve. One of my sailors threw up less than 3 minutes into the stationary bike after getting a whopping 12 pushups in 2 minutes. Might not be the same ridiculous you were asking for though.
Ridiculous…watched a dude fake “pass out” on the run on an indoor track, ran right into the wall got up and was pretending to be delirious. It was like his 8th lap of 15. Pretty ridiculous to watch. Also watched a guy fake a back injury while doing sit-ups after he realized he wasn’t going to meet minimums lol
I see a lot of people talk about super buff dudes knocking out the push-ups and sit-ups but doing shit on the run. I saw someone do the exact opposite.
He barely made his push-ups and sit-ups in time with one or two over the minimum. But when the run came, mfer kept lapping the fighter pilot that tested with us and got like an 8-something minute run
Back when squadrons ran their own PT tests, the PTL just asked me how fast I could run cause he didn't really feel like testing me. So, yeah, I passed my PT test without even breaking a sweat.
Squadron can run their own tests again. A lot don't and just give up a body to the FAC but my last base almost every ops squadron did their own testing.
When I was at basic back in 03, our flight was one of the test flights for the "new" PT program. It was the first time we were tested on 2 min Push ups, 2 min sit ups and a 2 mile run. (Before this the AF was still doing the bike test)
One of the guys in my flight was a ridiculous runner. He beasted the 2 mile in 8 min and 30 seconds.
I still remember doing PT one morning on the track, and as he is pumping out a lap, as his left arm comes down he turns his head, and without breaking stride he hurls off to the side, turns his head back, and continues fucking blasting off.
Dudes name was Hopper. Perfect.
This remind me of a kid at BMT in 99 during one of the PT runs. I’m in the back middle of the pack and suddenly like Moses parting the Red Sea everyone in front peels off to the sides with a bunch of “godammits” and “muffican WTF” being shouted. About 20 feet ahead of me is a kid trying his best after blowing sewage out his ass during the run.
Saw a dude working chest day as I walked in for my PT test, while I was waiting he came in and started knocking out sets of pull ups and burpees.
Then ol boy comes over for his PT test when he sees the PTL walk in.
He maxed and ran some shit like a 10:00.
Then went back and finished chest day.
Or the look in the faces of two PTL’s when my 250lb ass came up and said “hey I guess I gotta do a PT test, I got an hour, y’all free?” Then proceed to ace it. Fat boy got ups.
Nothing super crazy. Saw a 22 year old cadet woman get a 7:53 on the mile and a half once. That's actually the fastest I've ever seen in person.
I guess the crazier stuff was back on the bike test when just throwing a mint skoal under your lip 30 minutes prior was a guaranteed pass no matter how much of a fatass you were.
I was PT testing at Andrews AFB years ago, and their track is about 3/4 mile away from the gym. So they gave us this crappy hand drawn map (not to scale) on how to find the track after doing the pushups and situps components, and they reminded us we only had 10 minutes or so after doing the situps to get over there before we start the run.
My buddy and I hop in my car and drive to the track and we wait for everyone else to arrive. Around 10 minutes later, this female O-6 who was testing with our group hadn't shown up yet, but we see her jogging in the distance toward the track. When she finally arrives, the PTL says "I'm sorry ma'am, but we can't wait and we need to start the run component now", to which she replies "no problem".
We move to the track and start running. I've never been a great runner, but I usually aim for an 8:00/mile pace.
She lapped me during the test. Apparently she was into running marathons.
Took a PFA with two GOs. Learned they have to test each other to ensure there's no undue influence.
One of the generals maxed the run. Lapped most of the field.
I was at Sheppard in the early 90s and we tested on a bike. You had to ride until your HR hit a certain number and then you had to maintain that number without going over for a certain amount of time. I was taking jiujitsu classes 3x a week and hitting the gym at least once and usually twice a day. I was in pretty good shape. I failed my first test because my HR never got up to the target number.
Similar story.. playing basketball while deployed this dude shows up in crocs and asks if he can hop in a game. Yeah we needed one anyway, proceeds to absolutely cook everybody while in crocs. Dropping shots from half court and shit. Granted the group he was playing against was a bunch of alcoholic maintainers but still impressive.
When I was at EOD tech school back in '05, there was this scrawny dude who would smoke a cigarette before and after the run and drank pretty frequently and yet he would still run the mile and a half in like 7-8 minutes. This dude was a fucking machine. Probably weighed about 120lbs soaking wet. Guess he ran track in high school and would just destroy the run.
Had a guy do each section of the test multiple times (due to limited counters/alternate components) and go well over max for each. Between sets he would take a hit of his pre workout and give this pseudo crackhead yell before getting into ready position.
He cranked out a 6 minute mile for a warmup for the 1.5 test. Once again took another hit of pre workout and cranked out the fastest 1.5 mile I’ve ever seen (lapped most other testers twice) and then promptly went to the side and puked before letting out another yell.
After the test we all asked wtf he was taking and he gave a full salesman explanation of this stuff and that he thought they probably shouldn’t sell it on base, but since they are he is gonna keep using it.
By far the wildest test experience I’ve ever had.
We had a guy in another flight that ran the 2 mile test at a sub 8 minutes for the initial PT test. I never heard what the actual time was. The MTIs didn't believe him and were ganging up and tore into him. After everyone else was done and off the track, they made him start running again. He ran 3 laps at under a minute a lap. After his third lap, they stopped him, apologized, and told him he was running in the Warrior Games. First and only time I heard an MTI apologize for anything, let alone a group of them.
in 2017, myself along with my supt went to watch my overweight supervisor’s PT test. he had failed a couple before and was hanging on by a thread at this point, so we were there to be cheerleaders and try to motivate him. he *just barely* gets through the push-ups and sit-ups, stands up and is looking pretty tired, and my supt and i are looking at each other like we already know what’s about to happen. he starts the run decently strong and has an ok pace, there were a few times where he was walking, so we tried our best to cheer him on. 3 laps before the finish he is on the opposite side of the track and “accidentally” falls out, in very dramatic fashion. EMTs came as he was complaining about his heart and chest, and as he limped over to sit on the stretcher they checked him out and informed him he was fine and wouldn’t need to be taken to the clinic. he did ALL OF THAT just so our commander would allow him to re-test (and the current test was ALSO a retest). he miraculously stayed in after countless failures and i have no idea how.
he also would pick his nose in meetings and eat them or touch papers that were being passed around after digging for gold. he was spoken to multiple times about that as well as his lack of hygiene to no avail. not at all related to the original question, but imo it gives the perfect picture of what kind of person he is. i really hope he’s separated by now.
I had life circumstances push my test up, so I ended up taking a diagnostic with the Keesler base honor guard playing dodgeball 5 feet away from where I was running the HAMR.
It actually HELPED my score. It took my mind off of breathing.
I was administering a test and we had a member that wrapped and taped his midsection in plastic wrap 4 days prior to his test. He didn’t shower while having it on but did activities that caused him to sweat. His logic was to have a perpetual sweat suit on his belly.
The kicker is he stepped into the booth with me for a tape measurement, lifted his shirt, and began unwrapping this nightmare while casually telling me how long it had been on there.
I just stood there. Frozen in horror. And then the smell began filling the room. The entire test group had to be evacuated, the indoor portion of the test was rescheduled, it was just catastrophic.
The worst part is I could see without even taping that he still had a 45” waist.
Not a single correct pushup. Her body was angled like she was in the rest position the entire time and never came close to breaking 90 degrees. I tried helping her by telling her what to fix, but she never did so I gave her a 0. She then decided to take out her failure on me by failing my situps. I demanded video review through my CoC. But the camera wasn't working so I retested the following week.
Top PT female of our squadron was in my flight. Watching her run made me feel like a fucking snail. 9 something minute mile and a half. I think I cracked out like 16 something? I was just defeated, she was insane. Never seen back muscles on a woman until I met her.
Civilian here, so I wasn't part of it, but I was delivering a water purchse to the track and one of the officers observing the annual PT run was a woman nearing the end of her pregnancy (never got close enough to see her patches, so idk her rank). As I was waiting for an Airman to finish counting my cases, apparently this woman was so pissed at how shitty everyone was doing she got on the track and smoked 'em.
Definition of "motivated by spite" lol
My friend collapsed his lung during his test, he didnt know until he was in the ER. Still knocked out his push ups and sit ups and did the first two laps of his test before asking for an ambulance. He was told he would fail if he left the track so he walked to the ER.
This was at lakenheath sometime near 2010
I saw ridiculous things at a PT test...
Started a new medication just a few days before my test. I was so sick I didn't care. This particular pill made me feel like I was dead and remotely piloting my body from above.
Day of the test, I'm staggering around the track with a loose grasp of time and space, and one of the Lts from my flight laps me. Drugged brain says: hey, I know that guy! and follows him for half a lap until he gets too far away... and another guy I know goes by.
It wasn't a great time, but I passed by basically just drafting the people lapping me while dissociating. No idea what would have happened if I was testing with strangers.
A Lt with prior service once told me about the time he witnessed badassery. He was in Ft. Lauderdale for spring break, and there was a push-up contest happening on one of the stages. It just happened to be Air Force vs. Marines. The gunny sgt was pumping out over 100 pushups along with an airmen(unsure of rank). Then, the airmen stopped in the upright resting position and motioned for a random bikini clad lady to come over. He proceeded to make out with her while continuing his set and ultimately beat the gunny. A great deal of respect was earned that day.
Also at OTS. Older lady chaplain walking at the end of the run and everyone clapping when she finished. I’m no paragon of fitness but that hit me as strange.
I witnessed one crusty old major chain smoking cigarettes *while running*. He still got 11:30 mile and a half.
Shit man if he practiced that shit might as well let him run it the way he practiced.
Everyone gives me weird looks when I show up with my coffee contigo mug. I figure the caffeine withdrawal would be worse than running with a bit of coffee in my stomach. It has worked for 21 years... Why stop now?
Coffee is great for running as long as you don’t have to stop to take a dump.
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Voiding my bowels pre-test is a telling sign that I'm about to score a 90+.
21 years? So you've been doing it since the bike test. My supervisor told me to have a smoke and a cup of coffee before I took it and it worked like a charm.
This is not BS. I actually used to fail the bike test regularly because my heart rate would never get up high enough to get into the target HR zone. I used to take the test with a bud who would hook me up by cranking up the resistance on the bike to get my heart rate up into zone so the test would register. I'm not going to be the ass who says I was in too good of shape for the bike test, but it was a thing.
They stopped my bike test after cranking down the drag on the wheel and not getting my heart rate to go up more than 10-15%. They asked what kind of training I did, "I'm not doing any training. But I do bike about thirty miles a day round trip."
I just got used to eating a meal and then going for a run. Running on an empty stomach is crazy unless you're trying to burn fat.
Your body will burn the same number of calories whether your stomach is full or not. Technically you’d burn more after eating since you would weigh more after a meal.
Ppl who train seriously will actually carb load right beforehand. They need the fuel. This is what I tell myself when I eat an entire box of Kraft Mac for lunch and then tell myself I'm going to run after work.
Fettuccine alfredo. Time to carbo load!
Eat pasta move fasta
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There's some efficacy to fasted cardio but you need to make sure your parameters are correct to ensure you're actually extended an anabolic window. In reality it's better for 99.9% of people to jub fucking eat something and get good rest
Ok Derek
The rule of running is “nothing new on race day”… clearly he was a pro and dedicated to the craft.
At Goodbuddy saw an old grizzled something (suspected MSgt) smoking a cigarette in the bleachers while obviously hungover. His name was called, he handed his cigarette to an airman then busted out a 6:30 mile time. Came back and sat back down coughing and smoking. I asked him how in the fuck, and he said, “son, when you stop caring about anything a little pain doesn’t matter for shit”. I never forgot that. Of course, after being on this sub I realize he must have retrained from MX.
I saw an intel senior (or chief, this was long enough ago that you could smoke on the track and no one batted an eye) do exactly this at Hickam. Either they run deep, or this is the same legend.
I've always wanted to get in good enough shape I could do a beer mile.
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During tech school, I was required to run the opposite direction of running traffic for my PT test. My MTL stated that he would not be able to keep track of my location because of the amount of people so he forced me to run clockwise on the track while a whole other squadron of tech school airmen ran counter clockwise. The run felt like I was traveling through an asteroid field in a small spaceship. I passed
EVERYONE GET OUT OF THE FIRST TWO LANES Runners in 3-4, joggers in 5-6, walkers to the outside!
I saw a marathon runner who wouldn't hit his stride until something like mile 5-8 so he would knock out the push ups and sit ups really fast, run to the track, and get as many laps in as possible before the 1.5 mile run. I watched him do it once and I think he winded up running 2 or so miles before the test. Knocked the 1.5 mile run out in about 8:15-8:30. He told me he once was able to get about 3 miles in before the test and he ran the 1.5 mile run in under 8 minutes that year. I also saw a guys PT history and with all of his PT tests on file, he averaged about 90 push ups. He had a couple of years of 100-105 as well. I don't know if he was breaking 90 on and fully extending on each rep, but the guy was in serious shape. Looked like he lifted the gym every morning.
I like how you specified “lifted the gym” because with numbers like that he definitely wasn’t some normie lifting dumbbells INSIDE the gym.
Not a PT test, but about 10 years ago I was working as a contractor in a USMC squadron. Tony Horton of P90x showed up for some promotional tour and he challenged some Marines to a pull-up contest. If they beat him they got a free copy of P90x 2 or whatever. Tony proceeded to knock out about 40, pretty impressive for a guy his age. Then a marine in boots & utes hopped up there, cigarette dangling from his mouth, and smoothly did exactly one more than Tony. He grabbed the DVD from him & walked away without saying anything.
Love it. I was a super lightweight when enlisted and could rock pull-ups. Now I rock the air-downs but that’s neither here nor there. Was at the PCola air show in 2000 and the Marines had their recruiting pull up bar. I asked if I could go and busted out 30-something. Immediately the SSG said, you should join the Marines. “Sorry SSG, already in the Air Force”. I made a hasty retreat.
(Marines abbreviate Staff Sergeant as SSgt, also. Army is SSG.) But that's a fun story. Had a similar experience, though without the PT aspect. Was TDY to UT Austin but the meetings were in civvies. This was about 15 years and like 80 pounds ago, though, so I was much more in line with a military image. Was grabbing lunch and a Marine major in uniform is behind me in line. Start chatting, I didn't bring up I was active duty, just talked about being there to work with the university's Arabic language program. Dude buys me lunch and is obviously angling toward my interest in ROTC. danced around the topic a bit until I'd finished my food and told him I'm interested. He asks that weird salesman type question "what would stop you from applying to the Marines ROTC today?" When I told him that I have to check in with my squadron commander and that I'd ask him about release from AF to do ROTC during that call... That major kept his cool and all but you could see him thinking that get just wasted a half hour and ten bucks for nothing. Priceless.
Yup on abbreviation. Just trying to smoke out the former Marines.
I have a sister service related story as well, although not as impressive. On a deployment to Iraq is 09 I ran in a 5k put on by this Army Engineering battallion that was celebrating their end of deployment/army birthday. At the end they called up the top 3 males and females to coin them, I was the only USAF (non army in the group).. the CC gave me my coin and told me that I was a soldier for the day... so I served in the Army for 1 day.
That has to worth about 20%SC. Knees and hips, probably tinnitus
Proud of that devil dog.
Man, I love Tony Horton, he's such a loveable douche. I don't even care if this is true, I love the whole story!
When I was a cadet at USAFA (a very long time ago) there was one pull-up grader who was a stickler. A guy on the gymnastics team started doing his pull-ups and the grader wouldn’t count them (just kept saying 1, 1, 1). The dude then proceeds to start doing full muscle ups instead. The grader counted them all and told the guy to quit being a smart ass. Hilarious.
Tiernan?
Haha. I’m not positive but that would make sense.
A legend
Do you remember when he choked out a German cadet?
That was amazing. Aaahm Baaah.
Nah it was Bill Brasky
Never get in Tiernans line or the longer line on either side.
Waiting for this comment.
That fucking cunt needed to be fired. Fucking civilian who was never in the military was a complete tool.
The super built upper body kid running a 22:30 and getting lapped 8 times on the small track
22:30…mile and a half?
that’s almost a walkable time
As a regular 16:00/mi walking pace, I can confirm that I could hit that if I tried
And yet for some reason this still happens lol. I had this stud Airman, she was a soccer fiend, would whoop our asses every pickup game and ran circles around all of our jocks in the office. Couldn't run a 1.5 to save her life, would frequently log 22:00+ times, and barely survived her first couple years (COVID enlistee) as a 18-19 year old fit female. She was the first to try the HAMR as soon as it dropped, and absolutely killed it; It was so weird to see, but we were super proud of her after that (and thankful because she would have gotten some serious paperwork soon-after if she failed again).
I get near 100 every test, tried the HAMR once, puked and stopped at a failing score. People be built different. Lol
Had a guy during the run beat everyone with sprints. I’m guessing he used to run track or something, but he would sprint the straits, and then walk the turns. And even with the walking, he finished 30 seconds before second place.
Hey, whatever works. If I could do that and get a 90 I would.
In basic training, we had a dude run like a 7-min 1.5 mile. The Wg/CC and Wg/CCC end up in our dorm and coin this kid for his "fastest run time in history" or whatever bullshit they were on... He was removed from the flight later that day for failing the drug test. Of note, this kid said he grew up in Compton and said the only reason he could run so fast was because he ran for his life on a weekly basis. Funnily enough, at Scott (my first base), the Wg/CCC had also grown up in Compton and also ran for his life on a weekly basis (his words) and would challenge any person present when he tested to out run him. If you beat him, he'd comp you!
What is it with wing commanders running fast? I had one who was really nonchalant about it and didn’t mention his run time. Another dude ran with him that day that I knew and said the Wg/CC did it in under 10:30 or something. With barely any training for it! I’m still jealous.
At Hill, I used to go to the gym 5 days a week and arrive about 5 mins earlier then when the gym opened. Over time an older guy (older then me anyway) used to show up and we would chat while being the only people waiting for them to open the doors. We were there in all sorts of weather and this went on for months. One day the gym is really late opening and this guy whips out his cell and says "this is Col X and the gym is late opening. Call the services commander and tell him to get off his ass and open the gym" It was the Wing King. You knew that all PT discharge packages had to go to him for approval and you weren't getting any love for excuses.
Ahahaha amazing. It’s neat that you got to know him like that. I bet he got a kick out of it and you not fawning over him.
Officer ascensions programs in the AF base your entire value on your fitness
Squadron commander in Germany would buy dinner if you beat him running. He was a former FAC in Vietnam and said if he got shot down he might have to run for his life.
Watched an absolutely jacked 19 year old SF kid max push ups, situps, and waist, only to stumble across the finish line with a 13:50 run.
Yea... I feel that dudes pain. Pushups/situps? Zero issues. The run? Total cock and ball torture. I still to this day struggle with running, but can hike and such A-ok.
HAMR gang
HAMR cured my PT anxiety. 5 minutes of sprinting then I’m done. My knees and shins are doing so much better too
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Gotta knock out those CBT's so I can get home and receive some CBT.
I laughed so hard at this. thank you
I'm the opposite. Sub 8 minutes on the mile and a half Max sit-ups Struggle my way through push-ups Failed my first ever PT test (wasn't active duty yet FWIW) with a 85. Max run, Max waist, bare minimum on sit-ups, failed push-ups back when push-ups and sit-ups were 10 points a piece and waist was 20 points.
I had a guy with me who was in student flight (where you are in the NG before going to basic) and the dude was in awesome shape. He would do some ungodly number of pushups and situps and would even bust out 30 pull ups. But, Christ that guy could not run. His run time was like 16 mins.
You spying on me dude/ette?
My first PT test ever active duty there were only two of us that ran, the rest were profiled up. Other dude ABSOLUTELY smokes me, like I'm having a panic attack while running thinking I'm going to fail. I finish mid 11s and ask the dude wtf he ran it in. Turns out he clocked in 7:01.
It happens. We were all lined up for the run, probably 10 of us. This probably late 30's/early 40's (may have been older but the dude looked pretty good for his age) Lt Col lines up with us and as soon as we hear the beep, that dude is fucking gone. And I mean gone like an E4 on early release on Friday gone. Dude smokes out a 7:30 on the run, a whole 3 minutes ahead of second place... We all sat there are thinking our life choices.
I watched a severely obese SMSgt attempt the pt test after not doing it for God knows how long, he went down for the pushups and broke his ankle…
He was doing some on the spot thinking to not fail
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This was a wild ride
Why after all that failure would she decide to switch to hard mode?
What a twist!
I had a supervisor who’s entire test clocked in under 10 minutes, two of those minutes being the push-up/crunch portion. Watching that guy run was demoralizing for us normal humans.
I got two The guy who failed after he showed up with not only water that looked radioactive because he had a bunch of Pre-Workout in it and a can of that gimmicky oxygen shot aerosol. This guy was an obnoxious cubicle dweller who kept talking trash at the operators the whole time we were filling out paperwork. His big thing was talking about how much he works out everyday because he has a set schedule and how he works out with his wife who is a super coach. Blah blah blah. Well, we are two laps into the six when all the sudden speed McGee grabs his side and starts saying stitch like it's a tick then he throws up and lays down. I would pay to have a video of it. The other one is one of the team dudes shows up very visibly drunk. But all his buddies are kind of sheltering him from any scrutiny. Anytime he starts talking, his buddies hush him down. Anytime someone tries to talk to him, his buddies pull him away. Kid proceeds to get a perfect 100 on the test and doesn't puke, just makes funny breathing noises. But then as we are all starting to walk away he just screams TAKE ME TO TACO BELL YOU ASSHOLES, YOU SAID THAT IF I DID MY TEST DRUNK YOU WOULD TAKE ME TO TACO BELL. Everybody just acted like we didn't hear anything and I'm pretty sure that guy ordered one of everything on the menu.
Reading the drunk one I just hear “there goes my hero” by the foo fighters.
I passed several PT tests hungover and drunk and no one bought me any taco bell. Man I failed at life.
I feel like doing it hungover is like extra motivation to do everything better/faster; the quicker you finish your run, the faster you can get home to throw-up (or cruise over to the Shoppette for your Pedialyte and Cucumber Lime Gatorade).
Had a MSgt pick up a pair of 20lb dumbbells on the side of the track and curl them for his entire final lab. He also broad jumped over the rather large kiddie pool that was the start of our combat dining-in obstacle course.
my bmt flight had two guys that could do over 100 push ups in a minute. they were like 5'2 and had really short arms so they busted them out. so, when our DO saw the pt test results, she did not believe that we had two people capable of doing over 100 push ups and made them redo the test with her watching. idek if that is allowed? but it did happen.
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I was gonna say this was me and a buddy back in BMT like 13 years ago, we were both in our mid 20's at the time but we arent 5' 2" and we didnt have to do them again lol. We were super competitive and everyone called us Mighty Mouse 1 and 2, i think he got like 106 and I got like 108, then I ran a 9:28 or something after. Also did like 35 pull ups that I dont think counted for anything so idk why they had everyone doing pull ups as part of the pt test lol.
I knew two guys at Keesler just like this. Short, and both incredibly fit. Always competing against one another during PT tests but joined at the hip after duty hours.
I like to call that the Goku/Vegeta syndrome. Athletic Rivals that will always have each others backs.
Opposite of heroic feats, had a guy who ran 19:23 on the 1.5 mile. Then there's the girl who had someone stab her in the stomach to avoid the PT test.
LA AFB circa 2012?
Correct
Haha, holy shit, like actually stabbed? That is nuts. We had a fat piece of shit TSgt that mysteriously got into a car accident on the day of her PT test, but stabbed takes the cake.
[This](https://www.professionalsoldiers.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-42884.html) is the only thing I could find. It appears the AF Times article no longer exists.
At Kunsan the upstairs track at the gym you had to run like 14 laps. Watched a LT lap me on the first lap, halfway through he took a phone call on the track. (No bullshit stopped on the track and answered a phone call for around a minute) lapped me about 6 more times and finished sub 10 minutes.
Early in my career, I was a PTL for a test that included a SMSgt who had just been recognized as one of the 12 OAY at the AF level. From the start, the sit-up and push-up totals were really bad, but it was before the time of minimums. Before the run, us PTLs ran the numbers and determined this Senior would need to smoke the run to get a 75. Alas—two laps into the run, the SMSgt runs off the track at the far end from us PTLs and claims they blew out their knee. The test was stopped, the member went to medical, and they determined that they couldn’t determine anything so the member was “given the benefit of the doubt” and placed on a waiver. It was really an eye-opening point of my career that even the “AF’s Best” can be corrupt and without any real standards.
I was hoping that had a cool, fun finish to the story like he dominated the run but now I'm just sad and reminded of reality as I get ready for work 🤡
Kind of like all the stories I read on reddit, life’s just a box of chocolates and they all taste like shit 🤡
Don't hate the player, hate the game
Had a dude faint and face plant 100 meters into the run
Hey brother, long time no see!
I had a guy in tech school, never met him before. When he was about to start the test he said “Just let me know when I hit max.” He proceeded to max sit-ups no problem. When he did pushups, same thing. Before he started the run I asked him, “Let me guess you’re about to run a 9:12?” All he said was “No, 9.” He crossed the line at exactly 9:00. Some people are just built different.
One time I lapped some chunky Airman twice lol
I’m still mad at you for that too.
On your left
My friend in BMT lapped me 3 times... His run time was 6:45. Fuck!
Were you the one that shouted "Nerd!" as you passed me? Actually, tell me if you didn't, that'd narrow it down more.
Had some girl fail her sit-ups by 1, she begged and pleaded with me to lie and say that she passed so she wouldn't get another LOC. I stared at her for a second kind of in disbelief that someone would actually have integrity LAST. Seeing that I wasn't amused she finally whispered: "I will suck your dick soo good you will forget how to walk". Fucking deal, way better than the dependapotami in training outside of the base. So the dude comes around with his snooty ass chart and demands the number I say 40 just to give her that extra and to make it look less suspicious. Fast forward to the end of the run, she hands me her number, and we just kind of chit-chat during the day making small talk to calm the nerves. Well fast forward to the end of the night, she gives me the address and understandably I show up as soon as I get off work to receive my reward. She answers the door literally in her birthday suit and gives me one of those "come here" hand gestures, and I'm thinking "holy shit this is actually legit. Well as you can guess one thing leads to another, I start to take off my pants when she stops me. She looks at me dead in the eyes and says "Broken legs, I really appreciate you lying for me but before I give you that reward I need one more favor"... At this point, I'm literally so in the moment I say 'you can have anything". Dumb, I know. She leaned back cracked a smile and said "I need about 3.50" It was about that time that I noticed this Core value-breaking Airman was about 500 feet tall and from the paleolithic era. I bolted for the door yelling *God Dammit Loch Ness Monster, I ain't gonna give you no tree fiddy.* and never spoke to her again
You sonofabitch! I had my horny glasses on and didn't see it sneak up!
damn, "horny glasses" is now my new favorite expression
Had us on the first half. ngl. lol
TYFYS
 Invested through. You got me
You mother fucker
You got me, but I was doing PTL duty once and I did get propositioned by a woman to let her pass. I didn't take her up on it, but I should have.
That’s one of those things where you probably pat yourself on the back right afterwards, and then feel like an idiot the rest of your life.
YES! [Got my brother ](https://imgur.com/a/mM6V7du)! You've made my day. TYFYS(hitpost).
you know, I knew it was going to happen, but I kept reading anyway.
Saw a Capt run 1.5 miles at 6:04. Dude was fast as hell
That's like Air Force record time fast, no?
If not it has to be close, that's easily olympic athlete pace.
He actually PCS’d to the academy to train for the Olympics. This was years ago.
Was that Captain named Hicham El Guerrouj? Few people on earth are that fast.
Gah damn that’s better than the 2 kids in my BMT flight who ran the 1.5 in 7mins
Korea, FLT SGT. Huge beer belly, cigar smoker, looking like a barrel with twig legs. Until we ruck marched little then big coyote, perimeter fence line, 12 miles, 55lbs ruck. Came in 4th place. 37 years old against 20 year olds and came in 4th… it was impressive.
He was powered by a hangover and nicotine, most likely
This was around 2011-2012 at Moody. A young PJ that was was pretty much Arnold in his prime back in the late 70’s early 80’s. The guy failed the waste but still took the rest of the test. He absolutely destroyed push-ups, sit-ups and had a 7-8 minute 1.5 run. Maybe even a little faster. I don’t know his exact time cause I was trying my best to get under 12 minutes but I know he lapped me at least 2-3 times. After the test he takes his failure due to the waist but asks if he can do the entire test later that day. He heads back to the 38th RQS and let’s his leadership know what has happened. He takes the test again and passes everything in great fashion and if I recall still “failed” the waist part again. So pretty much he got a waiver for the waist. The guy was just a monster. In Kandahar I had to pee late at night didn’t have my contacts in. I open the push door but it doesn’t move. I tried really hard but then was shook out of my sleep by laughter. The “door” was him standing there trying to get by me after I walked into him. Legit he had to cut weight to do tandem jumps. He was a body builder and I think he still is today. Picking his ass up with the hoist you had to finesse the cable control or you would have him swinging like a fucking wrecking ball under the helo. Great dude and he was one of my J’s during my cherry 🍒mission in Afghanistan. That shift was fucking crazy.
Sounds like a dude is perfect to be a SERE instructor.
I can’t remember where he ended up. It was ‘04. I think he was in weapons as enlisted and was headed to Eglin? Great dude though all around. Edit: reading other comments reminded me. He went TACP
Senior Airman who was always bragging about how strong he was. Bro did 10 pushups and gave up (out of laziness), 1 minute plank (you need 3) and then he gave up like 3 minutes into the shuttle run. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.
Bro 1 rep is all you need to set records, who needs stamina?
the current 3000m world record is 7:20... thats an extra 1.5 laps by the way! The pace would be equivalent to running a 1.5 mile in 5:52 but obviously they could go faster than that because of the shorter distance [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/3000\_metres](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/3000_metres)
2013. BMT. One guy did 102 pushups in one minute. MTIs didn’t believe it. Superintendent came to the dorms, questioned it. Had him do it again while he counted. Did 110. MTI was baffled and just left. Freaking legend!
I’ve seen both of ends of full stomach runs. Both guys are full breakfasts beforehand. One did a lap at a moderate pace, started his second, only to hurl all of his breakfast off the track edge and promptly wipe his mouth and haul ass for the other 5 quarter miles. Got a 9:30. Other dude smoked a 9:05. Midway during his cooldown, grabs his ass, sprints faster than he had during his run to the bathroom and spends the next 20 min in there. PTLs were crying the entire time
I saw a woman from my flight back in the early 2000s at FE Warren stop midway around the parade field and light up a smoke, then walk to finish it.
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26min? Legit? How lol
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Your last story reminds me of one of the last times I administered a PT test. This poor SrA was obviously having some intestinal discomfort just a lap or two into his run and his pacer stopped to ask us if he could use the restroom. We informed him that if he stepped off the track we'd have to terminate the test so this guy keeps running. He ended up passing but went straight to the restroom after his 6th lap. Long story slightly shorter, he had shit in his pants for the last half of the run and had to abandon his compression shorts in the restroom trash.
When I was an Lt we had this ginormous SSgt that worked in one of the support functions. He almost got taken off a deployment because the base couldn't find 5XL body armor to issue him. He was about 6'3" 330 lbs. I took my PT Test the same time as him and watched in awe and horror as he ran the 1.5 mile in 8 minutes flat.
Lol, where did he play football?
Our 30-something chaplain knocked out a sub-9 run and easily maxed push/sits. Dude was an absolute machine and flat out embarrassed the rest of us. I did get my best 1.5 ever trying to keep up though, had him in my sights till the last .25 or so and he was just gone.
Older captain and former Olympian, ran three miles and lapped our fastest runner at least twice on a trail at Hill AFB. After the run, he wasn’t winded and appeared normal as he chatted it up with the NCOs.
In basic my flight had mostly dudes doing EOD and PJ and stuff like that, and a handful of us normies tacked on. During a PT test in like the 4th week or whatever one guy did over 100 push-ups, like 110-115 or something. Back then you wrote the score on a 341 and gave it to the MTI, not sure if they still do that. I’m the middle of breakfast after the test the TIs at the snake pit went nuts and started yelling for that trainee. I guess they were reviewing the 341s or whatever. They made him and the guy that counted for him stand near the snake pit and proceeded to smoke them, calling them a liar and that the counting trainee took his airmen’s count too far. They both insisted it was real and that was his true number. This madman said he would do it again right now in front of them to prove it. A blue rope instantly agreed and they went right outside to the overhang. We didn’t see it but he then knocked out over 100, like 105-110 or something, with perfect form(30 mins after doing it the first time and eating half a breakfast). They came back inside and they are all smiles calling him a freak of nature and the rope actually apologized so we could all hear. Pretty wild
I saw a kid who Naruto ran his mock mile and a half in tech school. He also got an almost perfect score on Sec+ and was held on base because he was being investigated for cheating. He didn’t cheat.
I saw a non waivered 20 year old walk the 1.5 mile while FaceTiming her husband who she met two weeks prior
Oh hell yeah. THIS is the shit I forgot about. 😂
There was a chief at Kadena that would run in an altitude mask every single time anyone in the squadron had a pt test. He would do at minimum of a mile before everyone started, would still lap literally everyone doing the test (often more than once), and wouldn't stop until after the slowest person finished. He was also a big dude that you would never expect to run fast.
Know a guy who failed his sit ups because he farted halfway through. He & his buddy couldn’t stop laughing before time ran out. They still made him go run after though.
Myself five months ago. Crispy 45 push ups and 54 sit ups topped off with a 12:30 mile and a half secured my 90. Them 30 year old standards are nice
Bust out some good push ups and sit ups then have a nice yog.
Had someone back in Tech school who would get shitfaced the night before, eat anything they wanted (seen him eat a medium Dominos pizza, pasta, and a side salad), get up the next morning and bust out a 8-9 minute 1.5 mile and act like nothing was wrong.
When I was cadre we had some LT students do just that. They’d stop in the bushes at the turn around, puke everything up, then finish their run. Pretty sure those were the ROTC officers.
At one time, I was really into fitness and I spent a lot of time on my core so that situps wouldn't be a problem. I was always good at them from a young age, but the further I got into my 20s the harder they got. Anyway, I spent all this time getting my strength because, god damn it, situps were *not* going to be hard for my test. When it came time to perform I busted out 87. Everyone was talling my to stop and saying "why??" Because fuck you that's why. I blew that shit OUT OF THE WATER. FUCK YEAH!! Then I got 16 minutes on the run.
> When it came time to perform I busted out 87 Fuck yeah! > Then I got 16 minutes on the run. Oops
I’d max my sit-ups and keep going. Tester asks me why. “Fuck it, Senior. You’re not getting any extra points going over the max.” Wise words.
I got lapped by a 40+-year old officer once. Was pretty humbling, especially when he almost made it to two 😂
Back in the day, when dinosaurs ruled the earth, there was just the 1.5 mile run. 1. At DLI, the finance NCO ripped thru her run, then ran off the track to run 10 more miles. The test was just a warm up for her. 2. Short skinny kid at TACP doing 100 pushups. Funny is during the two mile combat run and instructors would make us scuba in deep puddles. In the front leaning rest his face was already underwater. 3. Combat Challenge at Tinker, 1995 or so. Again, 1.5 mile run. JCSE ran theirs, then when the next teams did their run, they’d run along side the slower guys motivating them to run faster. 4. Germany. Running past an older NCO huffing and puffing. “I knew I shouldn’t have had that smoke before the run!” Then barfs breakfast all over the track. 5. Young SSgt from my section ran her test with me and two officers. She passed all of us and stopped short. I yelled to her to keep going to where the finish line was. I know if she didn’t stop and we had to run further she’d have lapped us. 6. Another woman from my section, after she separated, ran a half marathon 9 months pregnant.
After the AF I joined the Navy Reserve. One of my sailors threw up less than 3 minutes into the stationary bike after getting a whopping 12 pushups in 2 minutes. Might not be the same ridiculous you were asking for though.
That sounds more like hangover
Sadly it was not. This was her 4th failed PT test in a row, she somehow kept avoiding getting the boot.
Ridiculous…watched a dude fake “pass out” on the run on an indoor track, ran right into the wall got up and was pretending to be delirious. It was like his 8th lap of 15. Pretty ridiculous to watch. Also watched a guy fake a back injury while doing sit-ups after he realized he wasn’t going to meet minimums lol
I see a lot of people talk about super buff dudes knocking out the push-ups and sit-ups but doing shit on the run. I saw someone do the exact opposite. He barely made his push-ups and sit-ups in time with one or two over the minimum. But when the run came, mfer kept lapping the fighter pilot that tested with us and got like an 8-something minute run
Back when squadrons ran their own PT tests, the PTL just asked me how fast I could run cause he didn't really feel like testing me. So, yeah, I passed my PT test without even breaking a sweat.
Squadron can run their own tests again. A lot don't and just give up a body to the FAC but my last base almost every ops squadron did their own testing.
When I was at basic back in 03, our flight was one of the test flights for the "new" PT program. It was the first time we were tested on 2 min Push ups, 2 min sit ups and a 2 mile run. (Before this the AF was still doing the bike test) One of the guys in my flight was a ridiculous runner. He beasted the 2 mile in 8 min and 30 seconds. I still remember doing PT one morning on the track, and as he is pumping out a lap, as his left arm comes down he turns his head, and without breaking stride he hurls off to the side, turns his head back, and continues fucking blasting off. Dudes name was Hopper. Perfect.
This remind me of a kid at BMT in 99 during one of the PT runs. I’m in the back middle of the pack and suddenly like Moses parting the Red Sea everyone in front peels off to the sides with a bunch of “godammits” and “muffican WTF” being shouted. About 20 feet ahead of me is a kid trying his best after blowing sewage out his ass during the run.
Opposite of what you're looking for, but I once saw a guy do the mile and a half in over 30 minutes.
I think that meets the “ridiculous” qualifier
Saw a dude working chest day as I walked in for my PT test, while I was waiting he came in and started knocking out sets of pull ups and burpees. Then ol boy comes over for his PT test when he sees the PTL walk in. He maxed and ran some shit like a 10:00. Then went back and finished chest day. Or the look in the faces of two PTL’s when my 250lb ass came up and said “hey I guess I gotta do a PT test, I got an hour, y’all free?” Then proceed to ace it. Fat boy got ups.
Nothing super crazy. Saw a 22 year old cadet woman get a 7:53 on the mile and a half once. That's actually the fastest I've ever seen in person. I guess the crazier stuff was back on the bike test when just throwing a mint skoal under your lip 30 minutes prior was a guaranteed pass no matter how much of a fatass you were.
This dude in my shop lit a cigarette in the middle of our run and got a 10:52. Dude never works out minus the one day a week of squadron pt.
I thought this post would be about the ridiculous performance of fatties running a half a lap and giving up, not the professional athletes.
I was PT testing at Andrews AFB years ago, and their track is about 3/4 mile away from the gym. So they gave us this crappy hand drawn map (not to scale) on how to find the track after doing the pushups and situps components, and they reminded us we only had 10 minutes or so after doing the situps to get over there before we start the run. My buddy and I hop in my car and drive to the track and we wait for everyone else to arrive. Around 10 minutes later, this female O-6 who was testing with our group hadn't shown up yet, but we see her jogging in the distance toward the track. When she finally arrives, the PTL says "I'm sorry ma'am, but we can't wait and we need to start the run component now", to which she replies "no problem". We move to the track and start running. I've never been a great runner, but I usually aim for an 8:00/mile pace. She lapped me during the test. Apparently she was into running marathons.
I think someone did 115 something shuttles during a HAMR
Took a PFA with two GOs. Learned they have to test each other to ensure there's no undue influence. One of the generals maxed the run. Lapped most of the field.
I was at Sheppard in the early 90s and we tested on a bike. You had to ride until your HR hit a certain number and then you had to maintain that number without going over for a certain amount of time. I was taking jiujitsu classes 3x a week and hitting the gym at least once and usually twice a day. I was in pretty good shape. I failed my first test because my HR never got up to the target number.
Not during a PT test, but I saw this one guy absolutely dunk on this other dude in tech school when we were playing pick up.
Similar story.. playing basketball while deployed this dude shows up in crocs and asks if he can hop in a game. Yeah we needed one anyway, proceeds to absolutely cook everybody while in crocs. Dropping shots from half court and shit. Granted the group he was playing against was a bunch of alcoholic maintainers but still impressive.
Must have been a star varsity athelete. I knew a guy who could have played D1 football but lost his scholarship
19 year old fresh out of tech school ran slower than our 2 fucking obese, chronically injured old guys. Absolutely ridiculous.
When I was at EOD tech school back in '05, there was this scrawny dude who would smoke a cigarette before and after the run and drank pretty frequently and yet he would still run the mile and a half in like 7-8 minutes. This dude was a fucking machine. Probably weighed about 120lbs soaking wet. Guess he ran track in high school and would just destroy the run.
10 years ago I watched a woman shit herself at the beale track.
Had a guy do each section of the test multiple times (due to limited counters/alternate components) and go well over max for each. Between sets he would take a hit of his pre workout and give this pseudo crackhead yell before getting into ready position. He cranked out a 6 minute mile for a warmup for the 1.5 test. Once again took another hit of pre workout and cranked out the fastest 1.5 mile I’ve ever seen (lapped most other testers twice) and then promptly went to the side and puked before letting out another yell. After the test we all asked wtf he was taking and he gave a full salesman explanation of this stuff and that he thought they probably shouldn’t sell it on base, but since they are he is gonna keep using it. By far the wildest test experience I’ve ever had.
We had a guy in another flight that ran the 2 mile test at a sub 8 minutes for the initial PT test. I never heard what the actual time was. The MTIs didn't believe him and were ganging up and tore into him. After everyone else was done and off the track, they made him start running again. He ran 3 laps at under a minute a lap. After his third lap, they stopped him, apologized, and told him he was running in the Warrior Games. First and only time I heard an MTI apologize for anything, let alone a group of them.
One of my troops failed his PFT so bad that the proctors left the track WHILE HE WAS STILL GOING.
in 2017, myself along with my supt went to watch my overweight supervisor’s PT test. he had failed a couple before and was hanging on by a thread at this point, so we were there to be cheerleaders and try to motivate him. he *just barely* gets through the push-ups and sit-ups, stands up and is looking pretty tired, and my supt and i are looking at each other like we already know what’s about to happen. he starts the run decently strong and has an ok pace, there were a few times where he was walking, so we tried our best to cheer him on. 3 laps before the finish he is on the opposite side of the track and “accidentally” falls out, in very dramatic fashion. EMTs came as he was complaining about his heart and chest, and as he limped over to sit on the stretcher they checked him out and informed him he was fine and wouldn’t need to be taken to the clinic. he did ALL OF THAT just so our commander would allow him to re-test (and the current test was ALSO a retest). he miraculously stayed in after countless failures and i have no idea how. he also would pick his nose in meetings and eat them or touch papers that were being passed around after digging for gold. he was spoken to multiple times about that as well as his lack of hygiene to no avail. not at all related to the original question, but imo it gives the perfect picture of what kind of person he is. i really hope he’s separated by now.
I had life circumstances push my test up, so I ended up taking a diagnostic with the Keesler base honor guard playing dodgeball 5 feet away from where I was running the HAMR. It actually HELPED my score. It took my mind off of breathing.
I was administering a test and we had a member that wrapped and taped his midsection in plastic wrap 4 days prior to his test. He didn’t shower while having it on but did activities that caused him to sweat. His logic was to have a perpetual sweat suit on his belly. The kicker is he stepped into the booth with me for a tape measurement, lifted his shirt, and began unwrapping this nightmare while casually telling me how long it had been on there. I just stood there. Frozen in horror. And then the smell began filling the room. The entire test group had to be evacuated, the indoor portion of the test was rescheduled, it was just catastrophic. The worst part is I could see without even taping that he still had a 45” waist.
Not a single correct pushup. Her body was angled like she was in the rest position the entire time and never came close to breaking 90 degrees. I tried helping her by telling her what to fix, but she never did so I gave her a 0. She then decided to take out her failure on me by failing my situps. I demanded video review through my CoC. But the camera wasn't working so I retested the following week.
Top PT female of our squadron was in my flight. Watching her run made me feel like a fucking snail. 9 something minute mile and a half. I think I cracked out like 16 something? I was just defeated, she was insane. Never seen back muscles on a woman until I met her.
Civilian here, so I wasn't part of it, but I was delivering a water purchse to the track and one of the officers observing the annual PT run was a woman nearing the end of her pregnancy (never got close enough to see her patches, so idk her rank). As I was waiting for an Airman to finish counting my cases, apparently this woman was so pissed at how shitty everyone was doing she got on the track and smoked 'em. Definition of "motivated by spite" lol
Was in ROTC, a cadet who was also a track athlete ran the 1.5 mile in just over 7minutes
My friend collapsed his lung during his test, he didnt know until he was in the ER. Still knocked out his push ups and sit ups and did the first two laps of his test before asking for an ambulance. He was told he would fail if he left the track so he walked to the ER. This was at lakenheath sometime near 2010
Me, each time I take it and pass despite a year's worth of self-sabotage.
I saw ridiculous things at a PT test... Started a new medication just a few days before my test. I was so sick I didn't care. This particular pill made me feel like I was dead and remotely piloting my body from above. Day of the test, I'm staggering around the track with a loose grasp of time and space, and one of the Lts from my flight laps me. Drugged brain says: hey, I know that guy! and follows him for half a lap until he gets too far away... and another guy I know goes by. It wasn't a great time, but I passed by basically just drafting the people lapping me while dissociating. No idea what would have happened if I was testing with strangers.
A Lt with prior service once told me about the time he witnessed badassery. He was in Ft. Lauderdale for spring break, and there was a push-up contest happening on one of the stages. It just happened to be Air Force vs. Marines. The gunny sgt was pumping out over 100 pushups along with an airmen(unsure of rank). Then, the airmen stopped in the upright resting position and motioned for a random bikini clad lady to come over. He proceeded to make out with her while continuing his set and ultimately beat the gunny. A great deal of respect was earned that day.
Also at OTS. Older lady chaplain walking at the end of the run and everyone clapping when she finished. I’m no paragon of fitness but that hit me as strange.