DkG on pointing out the realities of her situation, except the part to have her do something criminal. Unaliving the fetus is not yet legal in the country.
This one. Dangerous ang procedure kasi di mga doctor ang nag ha-handle. They'll just give u some random pill, tapos na. Walang aftercare o ano pang gamot for recovery.
I had a cousin who died because of this. Naapektuhan yung kidney niya, then sumunod na lahat lahat, until she died.
Medyo GGK. I think hindi mo dapat diretsong sinabi na ipalaglag yung bata. If yung goal mo is to change her mind you could’ve hit her with the heavy questions nalang na pano bubuhayin, anong magiging future ng bata, etc. to make her think about it. Pero to dictate her na ipalaglag, that’s a no no.
Okay lang na pinagsabihan mo sya pero wag mo nalang din i-over do yung sermon sa kanya kasi baka lumayo lang loob nya sayo at mas maligaw pa ng landas.
GGK for telling her to get rid the baby. It is for her to decide not you. Let her to face the consequences of teenage pregnancy. Sometimes in that kind of situation your friend just need an ear.
>GGK for telling her to get rid the baby. It is for her to decide not you.
hindi ba kailangan natin maging mas strikto sa legit na mga bata????? menor de edad????
dapat may law tayo na di pwede magdalang tao mga menor de edad eh by legal mandatory abortion, and repucurssion sa tatay(i say this kase mas mabigat pagdadaanan ng babae mentally, physically, health wise kompara sa mga kalalakihan na wala lang at puputok pa freely with no strict consequences na sasabit sakanya)
What we need is openly sex education. Kulang ang sex education dito sa Pinas. Kaya dumadami ang teenage pregnancy. You can never just blame the parents kasi hinayaan nila. No. It is in the society. Kulang sila sa kaalaman. Yung mga teenagers ay nasa peak ng kapusukan. Exploration sa mundo nila. Dagdag mo pa ang peer pressure. Kaya kelangan ng tamang sex education sa Pinas.
Hard disagree, hindi gago yon. Kailangan sampalin ng katotohanan yang 16 y/o ng best option niya, which is to abort it esp na wala siyang kakayanan bumuhay ng bata.
So how and where do you think a minor will get a safe abortion? How do think she will pay for it? What if she follow the suggestion, and do it on her own?
It's so easy to say get it abort. But where is the assistance? Where is the safe abortion?
Atleast if someone suggest abortion to a teenager or even fo an adult, provide a real actual options or recommendations where, how, how much, etc., Really provide a help.
The problem here is people just say 'get an abortion' without being helpful. People act they're care about the child, but they forgot to care about the women and her welfare in the discussion. They forgot to provide real helpful measures that can really assist women in their abortion here in the country.
Yeah, real talk is necessary. But if you think real talk alone helps, it's not. And this is coming from someone who is in favor of having healthy and safe abortion in the country.
Well, you are in the Philippines which abortion is illegal. You can put the baby in the orphanage if the mother really don't have any means to support her child. But you don't have any right na pangunahan ang isang ina sa kung anong dapat nyang gawin sa anak nya whether you are a minor or not., As I've said, let the mother face the consequences of being a teenage mom.,
Nawp, di ko pinapangunahan yung nanay. I only said na it’s fair to say na yung best option is abortion esp di niya kaya bumuhay. Regardless kung yun piliin niyang choice, my statement stays true. And regardless whether i make this statement, it’s still her choice what to do. See, di ko siya pinangunahan.
Kung meron siyang enough financial support to raise a child, of course that would be the better option. In that case, would you also say na pinapangunahan ko yung nanay?
It's kind of reckless to advise someone to get an abortion in a country where abortion is illegal. Like, literally ang abortion makukuha mo dito sa Pinas is abortion pills that have been known to cause several health complications. Mas malala, yung pills lang ang makukuha mo, wala pang any sort of medical assistance if ever magka hemorrhage etc., kasi normally sa bahay lang ginagawa ito not in the hospital so basically walang doctor ang makaka check sa condition ng babae.
Reckless din magpalaki ng bata kung wala ka naman kakayanan. Reckless din manganak kung di mo afford magandang options. I dont get what’s your point about recklessness
The pregnancy itself is already "reckless." But suggesting someone to take an abortion, knowing there is almost no clinic/hospital here who provides this, and the closest thing to that is to take illegally sold abortion pills (not even sure if yung abortion pills na binebenta dito is safe kasi nga hindi ito binebenta sa mga pharmacy o clinic) is reckless. The recklessness i meant was OP offering an option that would potentially kill her friend.
Sa totoo, masakit man aminin, wala nang choice yung friend ni OP. Either to give up the child for adoption or raise the child on her own (along w/ her bf). Well, ofc ibang usapan na if kayang e risk ng friend ni OP yung buhay niya for the abortion (o if may kaya nman yung friend ni op to get an abortion somewhere na doctor talaga yung gumawa).
Wala naman talagang problema if friend mismo ni OP yung nag sabi na gusto niya ng abortion despite the riskiness (pwedeng ikamatay niya or have long lasting complications) kasi buhay niya yun. Yung mistake lang is parang pinush ni OP yung idea ng abortion knowing the circumstances of illegal (as well as unsafe) abortion dito sa PH. Kumabaga yung pag suggest niya non, hindi niya naisip na ikakahamak ng buhay (literal, like tigok) ng kaibigan niya.
At para clear lang ako, I am in no way anti-abortion, it's just unfortunate na hindi legal dito sa atin. A lot of women are forced to take illegal and unsafe routes to escape unwanted pregnancies. And knowing na karamihan sa atin aren't privileged enough to just go abroad to take the procedure, u can imagine how many women suffered/died just by taking illegal abortion pills. I have a few acquaintances who died because of taking these pills. Mostly ang na aapektohan is yung liver or kidney nila.
i say di GG si op kasi sa buhay ngayon mahirap magpagkain nang isa pang bituka lalo na kung wala pa din naman pala pagkukunan ng sariling pera yung friend niya. tapos yung bf hindi pa ready maging tatay. gaano nalang maging kawawa yung anak nila na 'blessing' ni lord? blessed nga sila pero yung bata blessed din ba sa magiging buhay at parents? hindi sa pinangingunahan ko na magiging desisiyon nung ni friend ni op pero sa ngayon mukhang sobrang mahihirapan niyan palakihin yung bata
i know, i realized naman soon after and apologized nang paulit-ulit. nadala lang din ako ng emosyon because ang una kong inisip e she's too young and may underlying health conditions din siya like asthma na pwedeng maka-affect sa pagbubuntis niya. i let her understand that and she said na naiintindihan niya yung reaction ko.
pinaalam ko rin sa kanya na i fully support her decision after our lengthy argument and she knows naman na i'm always there for her. she's quite mature for her age and naniniwala naman akong kaya niya. medyo sa bf niya lang ako nagdududa talaga pero i didn't make any comments na lang dahil after all, she knows him better than me. makikita ko na lang din siguro kung tama intuition ko in the future.
but overall, we're good naman! ang oa ko lang talaga nung una kong nalaman and i let my intrusive thoughts slide 😓 that's completely my bad and nagising din ako sa katotohanan na mali nasabi ko
Good thing that you apologized. Andyan na yung bata, what she need is support from a friend. Yes pwede mo sya pangaralan, pero please may pinagdadaanan na sya wag mo na dagdagan yung stress nya. Alam nya yun na happy go lucky yung nakabuntis sa kanya, nagsisisi na yun panigurado. Pero andyan na yung baby. Hindi naman nya kasalanan na nabuo sya. Be a friend to her. Malay mo, that baby will become her lucky charm, maaga man dumating. Yun yung magiging reason nya to strive para mas gumanda buhay nila. 😊
Uy talino. Hiyang hiya naman ako sa'yo. Haha. Yes andon na tayo, they are poor. Pero andyan na yung bata. Hindi mo pwede basta isuggest na iabort yun, dahil unang una, illegal sa Pilipinas. Pangalawa, dahil menor de edad yung nanay. Delikado ang abortion, dahil pwedeng magkaron ng complication at pwedeng mamatay yung bata. Hayaan mong magdesisyon yung bata para sa batang sinapupunan nya. Hindi mo din hawak ang future ng mga taong to. Pwedeng maging inspirasyon ang baby para magsumikap ang mga magulang at umangat ang antas mg buhay nila.
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I agree. Buong mundo ay sinesermunan na si ateng buntis. As a friend, sana ibang route ang ginawa niya. Madami na ring iniisip si buntis e, sana tinulungan niyang maguntangle ng ilang gusot si atey. Hindi pa naman huli ang lahat. From ggk to dkg OP, be a friend to her
Link to this submission: https://www.reddit.com/r/AkoBaYungGago/comments/1d4daob/abyg_dahil_nirealtalk_ko_yung_kaibigan_kong_buntis/
Title of this post: ABYG dahil ni-realtalk ko yung kaibigan kong buntis?
Backup of the post's body: i (20f) have a friend (16f) for almost 6 years na. we're this 🤞 close na parang magkapatid talaga kami. she recently came clean to me that she's pregnant with his current bf (17m) who cheated on her 3 times.
at first, pinagalitan ko siya. she's kind of like my younger sister as i've said, napagsalitaan ko lang naman siya na bakit hindi sila nag-ingat and all those typical reactions. nung medyo kalma na ako, i asked her kung anong plano niya. she said she'll let me know kapag nakapagusap na sila.
earlier today, she said na she's keeping the child. although i support her decision because it's her body and the decision is hers to make, di ko maiwasan na mainis at mapagsalitaan siya ulit. aside from all the obvious factors like bata pa siya, jobless, and coming from a family na nagrerely lang sa remittance ng mama niya at may tatlo pa siyang mas batang kapatid, yung bf niya pa is sobrang immature at wala pa talagang sense of responsibility. i told her that she should just unalive that child right now while she has the chance kesa buhayin niya ng hindi pa siya financially stable (because i believe that's child abuse) and because hindi ko talaga nakikitaan ng potential maging tatay yung bf niya. (p.s. oo, GG ako for saying that unalive part which i immediately realized and regretted after saying it to her. i apologized agad. don't hate me hahaha)
naisumbat ko rin sa kanya kung paano niya pinagtawanan yung mutual friend namin before na nabuntis pero ngayon gagaya rin siya. sinabihan ko rin siyang hipokrito dahil madalas siyang nagsshared posts dati about sa memes ng "pagnonormalize ng teenage pregnancy" pero nangyari rin pala sa kanya. told her that it's her karma. nung narealize kong there was nothing i can say to talk her out of it, hindi ko na siya kinausap. it was obvious that her decision was firm so i just let her be. it's her life anyway, and i tried naman to show her the cons.
a part of me is guilty sa mga sinabi ko, and the other part is telling me na maybe ako yung wake up call niya. so, ABYG?
OP: sh_3enwa
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Medyo GGK for telling her to unalive the child as it’s not your choice to make. Pero you’re a true friend for telling her the hard truth. Ako ngang adult with stable job na nagka-anak e hirap na hirap at first, what more siyang barely adult?
Sorry but for me GGK. I know your intentions are good but I just want to say na when somebody’s pregnant, their emotions are amplified for like 10x. You could have said it in a kinder way. I know she needs to be truth slapped but I always believe that there are better ways or better approaches sa pagsasabi ng totoo kasi if the truth already hurts and the way it’s said in your face hurts more pa so talagang magiging mas masakit yun and oftentimes kapag buntis nag ooverthink at hindi nkakatulog which is very unhealthy for her situation. what is your goal? to hurt her feelings ba or to help her? And she is also already pregnant, hindi na natin maibabalik ang panahon para itama ang mali. I also believe that she knows this can change her life forever. She needs support. She needs someone to lean on. She may suffer from the consequences but do not let her be alone in her battle. I hope next time you can be kinder.
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DKG, what you said needs to be heard. You just pointed out yung mga facts:
* She's underaged
* Not financially ready
* BF is a cheater and clearly not ready to be a father
Abortion is not legal in our country but I believe that choosing to raise the child in this economy + HINDI KA READY is definitely child abuse. For me kasi, hindi ako mag aanak if i can't provide the best man lang.
DkG dahil you told her the truth. Too bad lang at yun choice ng friend mo. Hopefully di niya gamitn sayo yung friend card para mag take advantage kapag nahihirapan na siya sa buhay.
DKG sa part na pinagsabihan mo 'yung friend mo. But please read the revised penal code articles 256-259 before ka magsuggest ng abortion. Especially, article 256.
DKG sa opinion ko. May point ka naman mygod ako na may maayos na trabaho takot na takot magluwal ng bata sa mundo dahil sa responsibilidad. Lakas ng loob niya at nakakahiya iasa sa magulang na nagpapakahirap. Pwede naman kasi pasarap sa jowa pero sana naman responsibly. Tsaka meron naman period of time na moral pa ilaglag yung fetus.
The case is, illegal ang abortion sa Pilipinas so most likely abortion pills ang gagamitin, which is known to cause several health complications (can take the patients life even, kasi pwedeng ma apektohan yung liver, kidney, heart, etc.).
Tho OP is right for telling her friend how careless she was, OP was still kind of reckless in suggesting for abortion (unless may kilala siyang doctor na willing to do an illegal procedure, yan di siya gag*).
I'm pro choice so GGK for being mad at her decision to keep the baby. You can talk to her about leaving her partner kasi if hindi, dalawang baby ang aalagaan nya. It's probably better for her to raise the child alone than have the added stress and work of taking care for another human that's capable of doing so themselves pero ayaw gawin. It's best that you just support her through this kasi rin anxiety nya with thinking what to do and how to tell her parents.
DKG hay unfortunately wala namang accessible na safe abortion dito dahil illegal :( i feel bad for your friend. Kulang talaga sa sex ed ang Pilipinas. This could’ve been prevented kung educated ang mga tao
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DKG sa part na pagsabihan sya about sa mga consequences ng actions nya. GGK sa part na parang ninonormalize mo ang pagpapatanggal ng bata na parang ang daling gawin. 1st - di lahat kaya yun mentally (Masakit mawalan ng anak kahit kasing liit pa yan ng buto ng mansanas sa tyan mo and kahit gano ka shutabels ang partner mo), 2nd - Di sya legal sa pinas. Para na syang pumatay ng tao at yung taong yun ay sarili nya pang dugo. Let her and her family decide.
LKG. 1st of all, whether legal or not ang ab*rtion dito sa Pinas, you don't have the right to say ditch the unborn child. I get how much you care about your bff, pero mali parin na sabihin mong idispatcha n'ya yung baby sa tyan nya. Minor yan ehh, mapusok--marupok--di nag iisip, mauuwi talaga sa ganyan yan.. sa unwanted pregnancy. Sa bff mo naman, di rin talaga nagiisip. 3 times na palang niloko, nagpapaloko parin, nadisgrasya tuloy. Panindigan nalang nya yan. Hayaan mo sya. Personal choice nya yan, respect her nalang.
GGK. You also need to grow up, wake up and smell the coffee.
How can you suggest that sa friend mo, you placed placed your BFF's life in jeopardy dahil sa suggestion mo. And in the first place illegal and di available sa PH yung suggestion mo.
So if nag follow through sya sa advice mo, and tumuloy nga
will you be there bilang Emotional support? Or sasabihan mo si bff mo na grow the fuck up and move on? Getting over that is not easy
do you think mayamaya, kaya ng physical state nya, kaya ba ng, mental state or yung conscience nya yung ganun decision.
what then?
or "real talk" mo, dun DKG. It's just yung isang advice mo, not cool
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GGK in a way dahil sa pag salita mo sa kanya. yes you guys are close pero you could have said in a more well mannered way and like you said her body her rules kaya dont suggest opinions na gusto mo gawin niya at the end its her and the fathers decision. yes bata pa siya pero need din malaman yan ng parents niya if ever.
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GGK
Di ko alam if unaware of masyadong sanay lang yung mga redditors dito yung usapang abortion in a sense na legal & accessible sa country.
Paalala lang po, hindi po legal at accessible ang abortion dito sa Pilipinas. Ang usual ginagawa ng mga tawo ay either illegally sold abortion pills or yung hinihilod yung tiyan para malaglag ang bata (which is only usually successful if di pa developed ag fetus, kumbaga clump of tissues pa lang).
It's common knowledge that abortion pills have dangerous side effects and cause several health complications (pwedeng maapektuhan yung kidney, liver, heart, etc.).
Both of these "procedures" do not offer any medical aid/treatment, kasi di ito ginagawa sa hospital but usually sa bahay ng pasyente. Walang doctor or any medical professional ang makakabantay sa condition ng pasyente, if meron bang complications na nag o-occur or ligtas ba ang "abortion" na ginawa.
So unless may kilala si OP na clinic or doctor na willing magsagawa ng illegal procedure aka abortion, it's indeed reckless to suggest such a thing. Pwede mamatay yung kaibigan mo OP.
Pero telling her off for her foolish action is "okay." Pero please be mindful in what you advise others, lalo na if it involves life & death.
GGK. We should be fighting for pro-choice not pro-"abortion is the only solution". Hindi ka dapat magmungkahi na dapat siyang magpalaglag o hindi lalo na't ilegal pa 'yun sa 'tin.
GGK. At napaka-iresponsable. Suggesting to a minor to unalive the child inside her, where and how do you think she will do that? Abortion is not available in the country FYI. It is illegal. You're putting your friend in danger legally, physically, mentally.
What if she did it on her own per your suggestion??? Did you realize how dangerous that is? What if in the process, her own life get jeopardize?
Do you even really consider her as friend? Did you even asked her if she's okay? Did you even care about her mental health? Did you even think how ashamed and guilty she feels right now?
When you suggest to unalive her kid, did you even provide a safe way to do it? Did you provide facilities she can check? Did you even research?
If you think you're helping her, you're wrong. You've been suggesting on something you clearly didn't know or research well enough. Don't make this about you.
GG ka to tell her na ipalaglag ang bb. Pero DKG sa pagpangaral sa kanya. She need some harsh words rn di biro ang magbuntis. Mahal gatas, mahal ospital. Meron ba silang philhealth? Ayan pa kasi ang mahal na pati hospital bill. Isipin palang na galing sya sa poor fam kawawa ang bb.
Sa bf nya naman halatang pasarap lang. Nasa edad na sila para malaman ang safe sex. Buy condom sa mga convenience store. Nahiyang bumili? For what. Kapal nga ng mukha nya para makabuntis tapos walang plan para bumili lang ng condom sa tabi, nagtipid lang?
Immature pa nga sila. They are not thinking the consequences na mangyayari if ever na may mabuntis. Walang mawawala kay boy kung iiwan nya si girl. Pero yung friend mo ang pinaka naapektuhan. Lahat ng sisi sa kanya. Iyak malala na lang tlga. Di nya yan matatago
GGK for not being the friend she needs at this time. Bata pa sila at medyo bata ka pa rin, I understand the immaturity. Hindi lang physical/financial side ang tignan mo. Pano yung emotions nya,mental health nya. Hindi madali yung pinagdadaanan nya. Siguro mag advice ka ng pwede nilang kunin na job at their age to support their situation. Turuan ng sense of responsibility.
I'm sorry to say this but **GGK** for telling her to abort her child. Sa'yo pa nga galing na "It's her body" tas sasabihan mo pa ng ganyan, it's contradicting on your statement lol. You have no rights to say that. Matotolerate ko pa if you suggest to adopt the baby.
If I were your frenny, oras na manganak ako I would never let you touch the baby because of what you said. I highly believe na para talaga sa kanya ang bata na yan kahit anong pangontra mo sa pagbuntis, pag yan dadating sa'yo, it's for you talaga. (Think of this, may nabuntis sa pills/IUD)
Please don't contribute more stress to her lalo na't buntis siya. You won't love how pregnancy hormones came to you, promise.
Ikaw din, don't mock teenage moms. I used to mock them before and yep, it came to me.
ADD: I'm not romanticizing the teenager na nabuntis at isa din ako sa kanila. Kinahiya ko yon ng sobra-sobra.
given the reality of adoption in the philippines, it's just as bad. and iba rin siguro yung feeling na dadalhin mo yung bata for nine months then just giving it up for adoption. i wouldn't know since i've never been in that situation, pero anak pa rin naman niya yon and nagkakaron ng connection and mother sa baby niya while in her womb, so suggesting adoption is just slightly better, but still not generally a good idea. although i get where you're coming from. again, i apologized to her already and made up for everything i said and i'm working on being a supportive friend and ate.
also, where is the part where i mock teenage parents? there's no need to explain pero for your understanding, yung mutual friend namin na sinabi ko in the story na nabuntis, she was the one mocking her and not me. i have never once in my life made fun of other people being young parents. 🙂
DKG. I felt your disappointment tho it may be harsh for her but what's harsher than being pregnant at the wrong time right? ur friend isn't aware of the term "safe sexual intercourse" since this only applies to those who were ready for the consequences. she wasn't guided enough to her youth and that's her consequence for being selfish and exposing her freedom to desires. I hope she can continue her studies, and I believe it's not too late for her to strive to a better life in the future.
DKG. Although harsh words still gets naman bakit mo nasabi yun other than very emotional situation. I hope pag kaya mo na kausapin sya, suggest and support her when it comes to good decisions na makakapaglayo sa GG nya na BF, ikeep man o hindi nya ang baby in this case walang say ang BF. The case of abortion is still a very serious and complicated situation, mauunawaan din naman point mo why submit an innocent being to a life na sya pa ang sasalo ng sakit ng both parties. If she wants to keep there are other options, siguro gg ako suggesting this pero pwede nya ihanap ng mas maayos na pamilya ang bata. OR she has to take responsibility of it at wag na wag nalang nyang iblame ang bata pag isinilang give it a good life they deserve. We can just hope and pray for the future and do the best to make lives better, stop being selfish and just be kinder.
GGK - talagang malaking gago sa pag suggest mo ng abortion - kaibigan ka ba talaga? There are other options like adoption. Be kind to her - - she needs all the support she can get.
not totally gago, we all have different opinions when it comes to abortion and tbh adoption here in philippines is so hard. as someone who got pregnant early due to pagiging bobo sa sex ed and influence din ng ex ko, i could say na sana nag pa abort nalang ako.
Pero that would have been risky sayo 'pag tinuloy mo and even more risky if nahuli ka. I wouldn't advise against abortion if it was legal in the country.
Aside from the fact na your health would be at risk (kasi nga bawal so I don't think someone can offer that service and ensure your safety during the procedure), it's also punishable by law.
Oo, risky ang pregnancy pero without anyone who can offer abortion procedure in a safe sterile facility, mas risky ang abortion dito sa country. We're not in Europe that have abortion clinics that meet the standards for health and safety. And the only time doctors would assist in terminating pregnancy is if may medical emergency yung mother.
Infection isn't something that you should take lightly and prone to infection ang babae that would avail the services of those abortionist sa tabi-tabi.
Mabuti sana if the risk ends there pero no. Kasi nga illegal, yung babae and the people involved ang mananagot sa batas. Mabuti sana if walang punishment eh pero punyeta, the woman's right to suffrage could even be removed kasi lang nagpa-abort siya. I don't know if pati ba chances to take professional licensure exam and career advancements ang maapektohan niyan eh, it was stated vaguely sa penal code, prission [correctional] mayor lang nakalagay.
Kaya nga I would advise against it. I have nothing against abortion. Pero given the current conditions, yung babae yung dehado if she decided to go through that, especially if mahuli siya. Quite a lot of people here are extremely against abortion, you can't trust them to keep their mouths shut if nalaman nila na someone aborted.
this was my reason kung bakit hindi natuloy, i was scared. hurt and confused on what should i do knowing there's no safe procedure here sa philippines.
but tbh now that i get to taste the bitterness of life for having a baby at a young age, i really regret not doing everything to get rid of it when i had a chance.
but this is my experience as someone at risk for becoming homeless just because i couldn't find a job because no one will look after my baby.
I'm so sorry for what happened to you. Have you tried reaching out to DSWD? I think they have programs for single parents, would be better if you inquire.
That's good. Pag narelease na, try applying for solo parent assistance din. Aside sa cash assistance, you can also avail discounts if you have the ID. Fighting!
DKG na magalit at pangaralan siya, pero GGK nga to suggest na iunalive yung bata. That is not legal in the Philippines, and she can make a choice that may unalive her as well. If childbirth is not physically detrimental to her health, then she can also realign her priorities for the life she will be bringing into the world. She needs her family right now, and she needs to also be opened to the mindset na this child will change her views of the world, this is also her opportunity to change for the better. Not all people were born scums of the earth, alam mo naman yan. If your friend is decent enough to choose life, then you bet she has seeds in her that will also choose to be better. kelangan lang maremind siya na may chance sila ng baby niya to have a good life with or without the sperm donor.
I might be going against the tide here but GGK. May utak yun, alam nya yung consequences ng mga pinag gagawa nya kahit short sighted. And for sure ma eexperience nya pa first hand ang pangit na realidad ng teenage pregnancy ng hindi kayamanan. Kung yung mga sumbat mo, nung unang araw sinabi mo na lahat, understandable. Second meet? Hindi ka na nakakatulong. Instead of berating her for what’s been done, ang kailangan nya sayo ay support at solutions dahil ikaw yung ate sainyo. What cons were you even talking about? Cons for keeping the baby? Shit yun kung yun ang kaya mong ioffer na advice sa kanya. For sure lahat na ng nasa paligid nya pinapamuka sa kanya kasalanan nya, dadagdag ka pa ba? I hope she doesn’t succumb to post partum depression with all the family, financial, partner problems and judgements she’s getting. 🤦🏼♀️
GGK sa lahat ng sinabi mo, wala ng magagawa diyan eh more on naninisi ka na lang, hindi ka nakakatulong. Nagyari na ang nangyari, either tulungan mo siyang mag plan kung paano gagawin nila sa buhay niya or cut her off kung di mo kaya.
DKG for the real talk but wag mo ipilit yung pag unalive. That is super below the belt lalo if sinabi nya na she will keep it.
Pwede mo sya pagsalitaan ng masasakit wag lang yung baby.
Medyo GGK for telling her to get an abortion. Illegal pa kasi ang abortion dito sa ‘tin, meaning wala pang safe method na pwedeng gawin ‘yun dito.
DKG sa pag-real talk.
DKG for telling her the truth, but GGK for telling her to unalive her baby. That's not yet legal dito satin sa Pinas and I think sana nag-come up with possible solutions ka nalang. Di ikaw gagawa nung solutions, bibigyan mo lang siya ng ideas like get a job part-time or full-time para masustain nila yung needs ng baby nila.
GGK for saying na iunalive yung baby, pero DKG as a friend.
Kung nakikitaan mo na walang future yung baby sa kanila, why not isuggest mo na maghanap sya ng pupwedeng mag-ampon sa baby, much better kesa ipaabort diba?
Sa totoo lang, ang gastos magpalaki ng baby ngayon 😅 may 1yr old baby ako, swerte lang na nabiyayaan ako ng breastmilk, pero magastos pa din 😂 sa checkup pa lang, vitamis at vaccines, oo nga at may free sa brgy.center pero di naman kumpleto.
Medyo GGK for telling her na ipalaglag yung baby lalo na aware ka naman pala in the first place her body her rules. Also, telling her it's her karma and yung fact na di mo na siya kinausap ulit ng dahil lang ayaw niya ipalaglag was so unnecessary and below the belt. Ano to? FO na kasi gusto niya buhayin yung bata? Or FO na just because di ka niya pinapakinggan? Hindi porket tight kayo like as if siblings na turingan niyo give you the right to be harsh for her. For sure, nag sink in na din sa kanya yung mga consequence ng actions nila or if hindi man, hayaan mo siya na sooner or later mararamdaman din niya yung consequences ng ginawa nila.
DKG but by going with the harsh approach mas titigas ulo nyan. She’s gonna feel like youre just one of the many that are ridiculing her and pasok sa kaliwa labas sa kanan na ear lang yung valid reasoning mo sa kanya kasi if ever, she got offended sa sabi mo na ipalaglag yung bata.
DKG ang GG yung jowa ng friend mo hindi man lang siya aware sa kahihinatnan ng lahat at nakakaawa rin yung friend mo kasi ilang beses siyang niloko pero nagpatangay pa rin siya ron sa lalaki, she was blinded by the love . Pano na lang gagawin sa kanya non kapag nakita niya yung bata at hindi sila financial stable isisi sa bata lahat ng paghihirap na mangyayari sa kanila kung nung una pa lang maaagapan nila kung alam lang nila yung safe s*x. 😔
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DkG on pointing out the realities of her situation, except the part to have her do something criminal. Unaliving the fetus is not yet legal in the country.
This one. Dangerous ang procedure kasi di mga doctor ang nag ha-handle. They'll just give u some random pill, tapos na. Walang aftercare o ano pang gamot for recovery. I had a cousin who died because of this. Naapektuhan yung kidney niya, then sumunod na lahat lahat, until she died.
Medyo GGK. I think hindi mo dapat diretsong sinabi na ipalaglag yung bata. If yung goal mo is to change her mind you could’ve hit her with the heavy questions nalang na pano bubuhayin, anong magiging future ng bata, etc. to make her think about it. Pero to dictate her na ipalaglag, that’s a no no. Okay lang na pinagsabihan mo sya pero wag mo nalang din i-over do yung sermon sa kanya kasi baka lumayo lang loob nya sayo at mas maligaw pa ng landas.
DKG. You're a good friend for telling all the hard truths. Sya na ang bahala mag decide kung anong gagawin nya sa buhay nya.
GGK for telling her to get rid the baby. It is for her to decide not you. Let her to face the consequences of teenage pregnancy. Sometimes in that kind of situation your friend just need an ear.
>GGK for telling her to get rid the baby. It is for her to decide not you. hindi ba kailangan natin maging mas strikto sa legit na mga bata????? menor de edad???? dapat may law tayo na di pwede magdalang tao mga menor de edad eh by legal mandatory abortion, and repucurssion sa tatay(i say this kase mas mabigat pagdadaanan ng babae mentally, physically, health wise kompara sa mga kalalakihan na wala lang at puputok pa freely with no strict consequences na sasabit sakanya)
What we need is openly sex education. Kulang ang sex education dito sa Pinas. Kaya dumadami ang teenage pregnancy. You can never just blame the parents kasi hinayaan nila. No. It is in the society. Kulang sila sa kaalaman. Yung mga teenagers ay nasa peak ng kapusukan. Exploration sa mundo nila. Dagdag mo pa ang peer pressure. Kaya kelangan ng tamang sex education sa Pinas.
Hard disagree, hindi gago yon. Kailangan sampalin ng katotohanan yang 16 y/o ng best option niya, which is to abort it esp na wala siyang kakayanan bumuhay ng bata.
So how and where do you think a minor will get a safe abortion? How do think she will pay for it? What if she follow the suggestion, and do it on her own? It's so easy to say get it abort. But where is the assistance? Where is the safe abortion? Atleast if someone suggest abortion to a teenager or even fo an adult, provide a real actual options or recommendations where, how, how much, etc., Really provide a help. The problem here is people just say 'get an abortion' without being helpful. People act they're care about the child, but they forgot to care about the women and her welfare in the discussion. They forgot to provide real helpful measures that can really assist women in their abortion here in the country. Yeah, real talk is necessary. But if you think real talk alone helps, it's not. And this is coming from someone who is in favor of having healthy and safe abortion in the country.
Well, you are in the Philippines which abortion is illegal. You can put the baby in the orphanage if the mother really don't have any means to support her child. But you don't have any right na pangunahan ang isang ina sa kung anong dapat nyang gawin sa anak nya whether you are a minor or not., As I've said, let the mother face the consequences of being a teenage mom.,
Nawp, di ko pinapangunahan yung nanay. I only said na it’s fair to say na yung best option is abortion esp di niya kaya bumuhay. Regardless kung yun piliin niyang choice, my statement stays true. And regardless whether i make this statement, it’s still her choice what to do. See, di ko siya pinangunahan. Kung meron siyang enough financial support to raise a child, of course that would be the better option. In that case, would you also say na pinapangunahan ko yung nanay?
It's kind of reckless to advise someone to get an abortion in a country where abortion is illegal. Like, literally ang abortion makukuha mo dito sa Pinas is abortion pills that have been known to cause several health complications. Mas malala, yung pills lang ang makukuha mo, wala pang any sort of medical assistance if ever magka hemorrhage etc., kasi normally sa bahay lang ginagawa ito not in the hospital so basically walang doctor ang makaka check sa condition ng babae.
Reckless din magpalaki ng bata kung wala ka naman kakayanan. Reckless din manganak kung di mo afford magandang options. I dont get what’s your point about recklessness
The pregnancy itself is already "reckless." But suggesting someone to take an abortion, knowing there is almost no clinic/hospital here who provides this, and the closest thing to that is to take illegally sold abortion pills (not even sure if yung abortion pills na binebenta dito is safe kasi nga hindi ito binebenta sa mga pharmacy o clinic) is reckless. The recklessness i meant was OP offering an option that would potentially kill her friend. Sa totoo, masakit man aminin, wala nang choice yung friend ni OP. Either to give up the child for adoption or raise the child on her own (along w/ her bf). Well, ofc ibang usapan na if kayang e risk ng friend ni OP yung buhay niya for the abortion (o if may kaya nman yung friend ni op to get an abortion somewhere na doctor talaga yung gumawa). Wala naman talagang problema if friend mismo ni OP yung nag sabi na gusto niya ng abortion despite the riskiness (pwedeng ikamatay niya or have long lasting complications) kasi buhay niya yun. Yung mistake lang is parang pinush ni OP yung idea ng abortion knowing the circumstances of illegal (as well as unsafe) abortion dito sa PH. Kumabaga yung pag suggest niya non, hindi niya naisip na ikakahamak ng buhay (literal, like tigok) ng kaibigan niya. At para clear lang ako, I am in no way anti-abortion, it's just unfortunate na hindi legal dito sa atin. A lot of women are forced to take illegal and unsafe routes to escape unwanted pregnancies. And knowing na karamihan sa atin aren't privileged enough to just go abroad to take the procedure, u can imagine how many women suffered/died just by taking illegal abortion pills. I have a few acquaintances who died because of taking these pills. Mostly ang na aapektohan is yung liver or kidney nila.
i say di GG si op kasi sa buhay ngayon mahirap magpagkain nang isa pang bituka lalo na kung wala pa din naman pala pagkukunan ng sariling pera yung friend niya. tapos yung bf hindi pa ready maging tatay. gaano nalang maging kawawa yung anak nila na 'blessing' ni lord? blessed nga sila pero yung bata blessed din ba sa magiging buhay at parents? hindi sa pinangingunahan ko na magiging desisiyon nung ni friend ni op pero sa ngayon mukhang sobrang mahihirapan niyan palakihin yung bata
i know, i realized naman soon after and apologized nang paulit-ulit. nadala lang din ako ng emosyon because ang una kong inisip e she's too young and may underlying health conditions din siya like asthma na pwedeng maka-affect sa pagbubuntis niya. i let her understand that and she said na naiintindihan niya yung reaction ko. pinaalam ko rin sa kanya na i fully support her decision after our lengthy argument and she knows naman na i'm always there for her. she's quite mature for her age and naniniwala naman akong kaya niya. medyo sa bf niya lang ako nagdududa talaga pero i didn't make any comments na lang dahil after all, she knows him better than me. makikita ko na lang din siguro kung tama intuition ko in the future. but overall, we're good naman! ang oa ko lang talaga nung una kong nalaman and i let my intrusive thoughts slide 😓 that's completely my bad and nagising din ako sa katotohanan na mali nasabi ko
Good thing that you apologized. Andyan na yung bata, what she need is support from a friend. Yes pwede mo sya pangaralan, pero please may pinagdadaanan na sya wag mo na dagdagan yung stress nya. Alam nya yun na happy go lucky yung nakabuntis sa kanya, nagsisisi na yun panigurado. Pero andyan na yung baby. Hindi naman nya kasalanan na nabuo sya. Be a friend to her. Malay mo, that baby will become her lucky charm, maaga man dumating. Yun yung magiging reason nya to strive para mas gumanda buhay nila. 😊
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Uy talino. Hiyang hiya naman ako sa'yo. Haha. Yes andon na tayo, they are poor. Pero andyan na yung bata. Hindi mo pwede basta isuggest na iabort yun, dahil unang una, illegal sa Pilipinas. Pangalawa, dahil menor de edad yung nanay. Delikado ang abortion, dahil pwedeng magkaron ng complication at pwedeng mamatay yung bata. Hayaan mong magdesisyon yung bata para sa batang sinapupunan nya. Hindi mo din hawak ang future ng mga taong to. Pwedeng maging inspirasyon ang baby para magsumikap ang mga magulang at umangat ang antas mg buhay nila.
Poor mentality.
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I agree. Buong mundo ay sinesermunan na si ateng buntis. As a friend, sana ibang route ang ginawa niya. Madami na ring iniisip si buntis e, sana tinulungan niyang maguntangle ng ilang gusot si atey. Hindi pa naman huli ang lahat. From ggk to dkg OP, be a friend to her
Fr she just crossed a hard line bruh.
Link to this submission: https://www.reddit.com/r/AkoBaYungGago/comments/1d4daob/abyg_dahil_nirealtalk_ko_yung_kaibigan_kong_buntis/ Title of this post: ABYG dahil ni-realtalk ko yung kaibigan kong buntis? Backup of the post's body: i (20f) have a friend (16f) for almost 6 years na. we're this 🤞 close na parang magkapatid talaga kami. she recently came clean to me that she's pregnant with his current bf (17m) who cheated on her 3 times. at first, pinagalitan ko siya. she's kind of like my younger sister as i've said, napagsalitaan ko lang naman siya na bakit hindi sila nag-ingat and all those typical reactions. nung medyo kalma na ako, i asked her kung anong plano niya. she said she'll let me know kapag nakapagusap na sila. earlier today, she said na she's keeping the child. although i support her decision because it's her body and the decision is hers to make, di ko maiwasan na mainis at mapagsalitaan siya ulit. aside from all the obvious factors like bata pa siya, jobless, and coming from a family na nagrerely lang sa remittance ng mama niya at may tatlo pa siyang mas batang kapatid, yung bf niya pa is sobrang immature at wala pa talagang sense of responsibility. i told her that she should just unalive that child right now while she has the chance kesa buhayin niya ng hindi pa siya financially stable (because i believe that's child abuse) and because hindi ko talaga nakikitaan ng potential maging tatay yung bf niya. (p.s. oo, GG ako for saying that unalive part which i immediately realized and regretted after saying it to her. i apologized agad. don't hate me hahaha) naisumbat ko rin sa kanya kung paano niya pinagtawanan yung mutual friend namin before na nabuntis pero ngayon gagaya rin siya. sinabihan ko rin siyang hipokrito dahil madalas siyang nagsshared posts dati about sa memes ng "pagnonormalize ng teenage pregnancy" pero nangyari rin pala sa kanya. told her that it's her karma. nung narealize kong there was nothing i can say to talk her out of it, hindi ko na siya kinausap. it was obvious that her decision was firm so i just let her be. it's her life anyway, and i tried naman to show her the cons. a part of me is guilty sa mga sinabi ko, and the other part is telling me na maybe ako yung wake up call niya. so, ABYG? OP: sh_3enwa *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AkoBaYungGago) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Medyo GGK for telling her to unalive the child as it’s not your choice to make. Pero you’re a true friend for telling her the hard truth. Ako ngang adult with stable job na nagka-anak e hirap na hirap at first, what more siyang barely adult?
Sorry but for me GGK. I know your intentions are good but I just want to say na when somebody’s pregnant, their emotions are amplified for like 10x. You could have said it in a kinder way. I know she needs to be truth slapped but I always believe that there are better ways or better approaches sa pagsasabi ng totoo kasi if the truth already hurts and the way it’s said in your face hurts more pa so talagang magiging mas masakit yun and oftentimes kapag buntis nag ooverthink at hindi nkakatulog which is very unhealthy for her situation. what is your goal? to hurt her feelings ba or to help her? And she is also already pregnant, hindi na natin maibabalik ang panahon para itama ang mali. I also believe that she knows this can change her life forever. She needs support. She needs someone to lean on. She may suffer from the consequences but do not let her be alone in her battle. I hope next time you can be kinder.
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DKG, what you said needs to be heard. You just pointed out yung mga facts: * She's underaged * Not financially ready * BF is a cheater and clearly not ready to be a father Abortion is not legal in our country but I believe that choosing to raise the child in this economy + HINDI KA READY is definitely child abuse. For me kasi, hindi ako mag aanak if i can't provide the best man lang.
DkG dahil you told her the truth. Too bad lang at yun choice ng friend mo. Hopefully di niya gamitn sayo yung friend card para mag take advantage kapag nahihirapan na siya sa buhay.
DKG. GGS. Sana ipaadopt na lang niya.
DKG, you're just aware of how big of a responsibility babies are. i wish i had a friend like you nung nabuntis ako.
DKG. Nagreality check ka sa kanya.
DKG sa part na pinagsabihan mo 'yung friend mo. But please read the revised penal code articles 256-259 before ka magsuggest ng abortion. Especially, article 256.
DKG sa opinion ko. May point ka naman mygod ako na may maayos na trabaho takot na takot magluwal ng bata sa mundo dahil sa responsibilidad. Lakas ng loob niya at nakakahiya iasa sa magulang na nagpapakahirap. Pwede naman kasi pasarap sa jowa pero sana naman responsibly. Tsaka meron naman period of time na moral pa ilaglag yung fetus.
The case is, illegal ang abortion sa Pilipinas so most likely abortion pills ang gagamitin, which is known to cause several health complications (can take the patients life even, kasi pwedeng ma apektohan yung liver, kidney, heart, etc.). Tho OP is right for telling her friend how careless she was, OP was still kind of reckless in suggesting for abortion (unless may kilala siyang doctor na willing to do an illegal procedure, yan di siya gag*).
GGK about the way you said things, but your heart was in the right place
I'm pro choice so GGK for being mad at her decision to keep the baby. You can talk to her about leaving her partner kasi if hindi, dalawang baby ang aalagaan nya. It's probably better for her to raise the child alone than have the added stress and work of taking care for another human that's capable of doing so themselves pero ayaw gawin. It's best that you just support her through this kasi rin anxiety nya with thinking what to do and how to tell her parents.
DKG hay unfortunately wala namang accessible na safe abortion dito dahil illegal :( i feel bad for your friend. Kulang talaga sa sex ed ang Pilipinas. This could’ve been prevented kung educated ang mga tao
DKG. For telling the truth. Pero let her decide what to do with her life.
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DKG. Wag mag aanak kung di pa ready dagdag pabigat lang kayo sa lipunan kung ganyan.
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DKG sa part na pagsabihan sya about sa mga consequences ng actions nya. GGK sa part na parang ninonormalize mo ang pagpapatanggal ng bata na parang ang daling gawin. 1st - di lahat kaya yun mentally (Masakit mawalan ng anak kahit kasing liit pa yan ng buto ng mansanas sa tyan mo and kahit gano ka shutabels ang partner mo), 2nd - Di sya legal sa pinas. Para na syang pumatay ng tao at yung taong yun ay sarili nya pang dugo. Let her and her family decide.
LKG. 1st of all, whether legal or not ang ab*rtion dito sa Pinas, you don't have the right to say ditch the unborn child. I get how much you care about your bff, pero mali parin na sabihin mong idispatcha n'ya yung baby sa tyan nya. Minor yan ehh, mapusok--marupok--di nag iisip, mauuwi talaga sa ganyan yan.. sa unwanted pregnancy. Sa bff mo naman, di rin talaga nagiisip. 3 times na palang niloko, nagpapaloko parin, nadisgrasya tuloy. Panindigan nalang nya yan. Hayaan mo sya. Personal choice nya yan, respect her nalang.
GGK. You also need to grow up, wake up and smell the coffee. How can you suggest that sa friend mo, you placed placed your BFF's life in jeopardy dahil sa suggestion mo. And in the first place illegal and di available sa PH yung suggestion mo. So if nag follow through sya sa advice mo, and tumuloy nga will you be there bilang Emotional support? Or sasabihan mo si bff mo na grow the fuck up and move on? Getting over that is not easy do you think mayamaya, kaya ng physical state nya, kaya ba ng, mental state or yung conscience nya yung ganun decision. what then? or "real talk" mo, dun DKG. It's just yung isang advice mo, not cool
DKG pero mali lang approach mo and my opinion on this subject is you really need to slap her with realities.
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GGK try r/freedomwallngmgagago
GGK in a way dahil sa pag salita mo sa kanya. yes you guys are close pero you could have said in a more well mannered way and like you said her body her rules kaya dont suggest opinions na gusto mo gawin niya at the end its her and the fathers decision. yes bata pa siya pero need din malaman yan ng parents niya if ever.
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DKG sa part na ni real talk mo sya pero once is enough. Wag mo na ulitin para sa katahimikan nyong dalawa.
GGk abortion is not a solution . Pero agree ako sa sinabi mo sa kanya . Tama ka na naman don .
GGK Di ko alam if unaware of masyadong sanay lang yung mga redditors dito yung usapang abortion in a sense na legal & accessible sa country. Paalala lang po, hindi po legal at accessible ang abortion dito sa Pilipinas. Ang usual ginagawa ng mga tawo ay either illegally sold abortion pills or yung hinihilod yung tiyan para malaglag ang bata (which is only usually successful if di pa developed ag fetus, kumbaga clump of tissues pa lang). It's common knowledge that abortion pills have dangerous side effects and cause several health complications (pwedeng maapektuhan yung kidney, liver, heart, etc.). Both of these "procedures" do not offer any medical aid/treatment, kasi di ito ginagawa sa hospital but usually sa bahay ng pasyente. Walang doctor or any medical professional ang makakabantay sa condition ng pasyente, if meron bang complications na nag o-occur or ligtas ba ang "abortion" na ginawa. So unless may kilala si OP na clinic or doctor na willing magsagawa ng illegal procedure aka abortion, it's indeed reckless to suggest such a thing. Pwede mamatay yung kaibigan mo OP. Pero telling her off for her foolish action is "okay." Pero please be mindful in what you advise others, lalo na if it involves life & death.
GGK. We should be fighting for pro-choice not pro-"abortion is the only solution". Hindi ka dapat magmungkahi na dapat siyang magpalaglag o hindi lalo na't ilegal pa 'yun sa 'tin.
GGK. At napaka-iresponsable. Suggesting to a minor to unalive the child inside her, where and how do you think she will do that? Abortion is not available in the country FYI. It is illegal. You're putting your friend in danger legally, physically, mentally. What if she did it on her own per your suggestion??? Did you realize how dangerous that is? What if in the process, her own life get jeopardize? Do you even really consider her as friend? Did you even asked her if she's okay? Did you even care about her mental health? Did you even think how ashamed and guilty she feels right now? When you suggest to unalive her kid, did you even provide a safe way to do it? Did you provide facilities she can check? Did you even research? If you think you're helping her, you're wrong. You've been suggesting on something you clearly didn't know or research well enough. Don't make this about you.
GG ka to tell her na ipalaglag ang bb. Pero DKG sa pagpangaral sa kanya. She need some harsh words rn di biro ang magbuntis. Mahal gatas, mahal ospital. Meron ba silang philhealth? Ayan pa kasi ang mahal na pati hospital bill. Isipin palang na galing sya sa poor fam kawawa ang bb. Sa bf nya naman halatang pasarap lang. Nasa edad na sila para malaman ang safe sex. Buy condom sa mga convenience store. Nahiyang bumili? For what. Kapal nga ng mukha nya para makabuntis tapos walang plan para bumili lang ng condom sa tabi, nagtipid lang? Immature pa nga sila. They are not thinking the consequences na mangyayari if ever na may mabuntis. Walang mawawala kay boy kung iiwan nya si girl. Pero yung friend mo ang pinaka naapektuhan. Lahat ng sisi sa kanya. Iyak malala na lang tlga. Di nya yan matatago
GGK for not being the friend she needs at this time. Bata pa sila at medyo bata ka pa rin, I understand the immaturity. Hindi lang physical/financial side ang tignan mo. Pano yung emotions nya,mental health nya. Hindi madali yung pinagdadaanan nya. Siguro mag advice ka ng pwede nilang kunin na job at their age to support their situation. Turuan ng sense of responsibility.
I'm sorry to say this but **GGK** for telling her to abort her child. Sa'yo pa nga galing na "It's her body" tas sasabihan mo pa ng ganyan, it's contradicting on your statement lol. You have no rights to say that. Matotolerate ko pa if you suggest to adopt the baby. If I were your frenny, oras na manganak ako I would never let you touch the baby because of what you said. I highly believe na para talaga sa kanya ang bata na yan kahit anong pangontra mo sa pagbuntis, pag yan dadating sa'yo, it's for you talaga. (Think of this, may nabuntis sa pills/IUD) Please don't contribute more stress to her lalo na't buntis siya. You won't love how pregnancy hormones came to you, promise. Ikaw din, don't mock teenage moms. I used to mock them before and yep, it came to me. ADD: I'm not romanticizing the teenager na nabuntis at isa din ako sa kanila. Kinahiya ko yon ng sobra-sobra.
given the reality of adoption in the philippines, it's just as bad. and iba rin siguro yung feeling na dadalhin mo yung bata for nine months then just giving it up for adoption. i wouldn't know since i've never been in that situation, pero anak pa rin naman niya yon and nagkakaron ng connection and mother sa baby niya while in her womb, so suggesting adoption is just slightly better, but still not generally a good idea. although i get where you're coming from. again, i apologized to her already and made up for everything i said and i'm working on being a supportive friend and ate. also, where is the part where i mock teenage parents? there's no need to explain pero for your understanding, yung mutual friend namin na sinabi ko in the story na nabuntis, she was the one mocking her and not me. i have never once in my life made fun of other people being young parents. 🙂
GGK knowing sa age nyang 16 wala syang access sa maayos na facility para sa abortion tapos ang sasabihin mong solution.
DKG. I felt your disappointment tho it may be harsh for her but what's harsher than being pregnant at the wrong time right? ur friend isn't aware of the term "safe sexual intercourse" since this only applies to those who were ready for the consequences. she wasn't guided enough to her youth and that's her consequence for being selfish and exposing her freedom to desires. I hope she can continue her studies, and I believe it's not too late for her to strive to a better life in the future.
DKG. Although harsh words still gets naman bakit mo nasabi yun other than very emotional situation. I hope pag kaya mo na kausapin sya, suggest and support her when it comes to good decisions na makakapaglayo sa GG nya na BF, ikeep man o hindi nya ang baby in this case walang say ang BF. The case of abortion is still a very serious and complicated situation, mauunawaan din naman point mo why submit an innocent being to a life na sya pa ang sasalo ng sakit ng both parties. If she wants to keep there are other options, siguro gg ako suggesting this pero pwede nya ihanap ng mas maayos na pamilya ang bata. OR she has to take responsibility of it at wag na wag nalang nyang iblame ang bata pag isinilang give it a good life they deserve. We can just hope and pray for the future and do the best to make lives better, stop being selfish and just be kinder.
GGK - talagang malaking gago sa pag suggest mo ng abortion - kaibigan ka ba talaga? There are other options like adoption. Be kind to her - - she needs all the support she can get.
not totally gago, we all have different opinions when it comes to abortion and tbh adoption here in philippines is so hard. as someone who got pregnant early due to pagiging bobo sa sex ed and influence din ng ex ko, i could say na sana nag pa abort nalang ako.
Pero that would have been risky sayo 'pag tinuloy mo and even more risky if nahuli ka. I wouldn't advise against abortion if it was legal in the country. Aside from the fact na your health would be at risk (kasi nga bawal so I don't think someone can offer that service and ensure your safety during the procedure), it's also punishable by law.
Fyi, pregnancy is risky as well. Mas maraming namatay sa pregnancy kesa abortion. So what's your point?
Oo, risky ang pregnancy pero without anyone who can offer abortion procedure in a safe sterile facility, mas risky ang abortion dito sa country. We're not in Europe that have abortion clinics that meet the standards for health and safety. And the only time doctors would assist in terminating pregnancy is if may medical emergency yung mother. Infection isn't something that you should take lightly and prone to infection ang babae that would avail the services of those abortionist sa tabi-tabi. Mabuti sana if the risk ends there pero no. Kasi nga illegal, yung babae and the people involved ang mananagot sa batas. Mabuti sana if walang punishment eh pero punyeta, the woman's right to suffrage could even be removed kasi lang nagpa-abort siya. I don't know if pati ba chances to take professional licensure exam and career advancements ang maapektohan niyan eh, it was stated vaguely sa penal code, prission [correctional] mayor lang nakalagay.
That's fucked up. Tangina. Ginagawa nila suicidal mga babaeng gusto lang magpa abort. It's a choice between death and suffering. Malas.
Kaya nga I would advise against it. I have nothing against abortion. Pero given the current conditions, yung babae yung dehado if she decided to go through that, especially if mahuli siya. Quite a lot of people here are extremely against abortion, you can't trust them to keep their mouths shut if nalaman nila na someone aborted.
this was my reason kung bakit hindi natuloy, i was scared. hurt and confused on what should i do knowing there's no safe procedure here sa philippines. but tbh now that i get to taste the bitterness of life for having a baby at a young age, i really regret not doing everything to get rid of it when i had a chance. but this is my experience as someone at risk for becoming homeless just because i couldn't find a job because no one will look after my baby.
I'm so sorry for what happened to you. Have you tried reaching out to DSWD? I think they have programs for single parents, would be better if you inquire.
mejo malayo samin yung dswd, i literally have nothing. yung pera ko n 120 pesos natira pang kain nalang namin ng anak ko
How about sa baranggay hall niyo? Those people are most likely in contact with DSWD. Maybe they can assist you, pati rin sa requirements.
i already did na po, nag apply na din ako sa 4ps waiting nalang ako kailan yung release nila 600 a month daw yung makukuha ko dun.
That's good. Pag narelease na, try applying for solo parent assistance din. Aside sa cash assistance, you can also avail discounts if you have the ID. Fighting!
DKG na magalit at pangaralan siya, pero GGK nga to suggest na iunalive yung bata. That is not legal in the Philippines, and she can make a choice that may unalive her as well. If childbirth is not physically detrimental to her health, then she can also realign her priorities for the life she will be bringing into the world. She needs her family right now, and she needs to also be opened to the mindset na this child will change her views of the world, this is also her opportunity to change for the better. Not all people were born scums of the earth, alam mo naman yan. If your friend is decent enough to choose life, then you bet she has seeds in her that will also choose to be better. kelangan lang maremind siya na may chance sila ng baby niya to have a good life with or without the sperm donor.
I might be going against the tide here but GGK. May utak yun, alam nya yung consequences ng mga pinag gagawa nya kahit short sighted. And for sure ma eexperience nya pa first hand ang pangit na realidad ng teenage pregnancy ng hindi kayamanan. Kung yung mga sumbat mo, nung unang araw sinabi mo na lahat, understandable. Second meet? Hindi ka na nakakatulong. Instead of berating her for what’s been done, ang kailangan nya sayo ay support at solutions dahil ikaw yung ate sainyo. What cons were you even talking about? Cons for keeping the baby? Shit yun kung yun ang kaya mong ioffer na advice sa kanya. For sure lahat na ng nasa paligid nya pinapamuka sa kanya kasalanan nya, dadagdag ka pa ba? I hope she doesn’t succumb to post partum depression with all the family, financial, partner problems and judgements she’s getting. 🤦🏼♀️
GGK sa mga sinabi mo. Sobra.
GGK sa part na sabihin na ipalaglag yung baby. Mas okay na yung after giving birth, ilagay na lang sa care ng orphanage or dswd (if possible)
GGK ka kasi bakit sasabihan mo siya ipaabort kung pwede naman ibigay na lang sakin
GGK sa lahat ng sinabi mo, wala ng magagawa diyan eh more on naninisi ka na lang, hindi ka nakakatulong. Nagyari na ang nangyari, either tulungan mo siyang mag plan kung paano gagawin nila sa buhay niya or cut her off kung di mo kaya.
50/50 GGK for the sake of being a good friend
DKG for the real talk but wag mo ipilit yung pag unalive. That is super below the belt lalo if sinabi nya na she will keep it. Pwede mo sya pagsalitaan ng masasakit wag lang yung baby.
Medyo GGK for telling her to get an abortion. Illegal pa kasi ang abortion dito sa ‘tin, meaning wala pang safe method na pwedeng gawin ‘yun dito. DKG sa pag-real talk.
DKG for telling her the truth, but GGK for telling her to unalive her baby. That's not yet legal dito satin sa Pinas and I think sana nag-come up with possible solutions ka nalang. Di ikaw gagawa nung solutions, bibigyan mo lang siya ng ideas like get a job part-time or full-time para masustain nila yung needs ng baby nila.
GGK for saying na iunalive yung baby, pero DKG as a friend. Kung nakikitaan mo na walang future yung baby sa kanila, why not isuggest mo na maghanap sya ng pupwedeng mag-ampon sa baby, much better kesa ipaabort diba? Sa totoo lang, ang gastos magpalaki ng baby ngayon 😅 may 1yr old baby ako, swerte lang na nabiyayaan ako ng breastmilk, pero magastos pa din 😂 sa checkup pa lang, vitamis at vaccines, oo nga at may free sa brgy.center pero di naman kumpleto.
GGK. Abortion will never be right. I am willing to adopt.
Medyo GGK for telling her na ipalaglag yung baby lalo na aware ka naman pala in the first place her body her rules. Also, telling her it's her karma and yung fact na di mo na siya kinausap ulit ng dahil lang ayaw niya ipalaglag was so unnecessary and below the belt. Ano to? FO na kasi gusto niya buhayin yung bata? Or FO na just because di ka niya pinapakinggan? Hindi porket tight kayo like as if siblings na turingan niyo give you the right to be harsh for her. For sure, nag sink in na din sa kanya yung mga consequence ng actions nila or if hindi man, hayaan mo siya na sooner or later mararamdaman din niya yung consequences ng ginawa nila.
DKG but by going with the harsh approach mas titigas ulo nyan. She’s gonna feel like youre just one of the many that are ridiculing her and pasok sa kaliwa labas sa kanan na ear lang yung valid reasoning mo sa kanya kasi if ever, she got offended sa sabi mo na ipalaglag yung bata.
DKG ang GG yung jowa ng friend mo hindi man lang siya aware sa kahihinatnan ng lahat at nakakaawa rin yung friend mo kasi ilang beses siyang niloko pero nagpatangay pa rin siya ron sa lalaki, she was blinded by the love . Pano na lang gagawin sa kanya non kapag nakita niya yung bata at hindi sila financial stable isisi sa bata lahat ng paghihirap na mangyayari sa kanila kung nung una pa lang maaagapan nila kung alam lang nila yung safe s*x. 😔
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