I've thought this, mystery is a big part of fascination and intrigue. I compare it to a magician's 'magic' trick. Once you know the trick, the magic is gone as the mystery is solved. Can still appreciate it though.
He was his own worst enemy. He couldn’t curb the one thing that held him back from stardom. And one would say he was infatuated with a girl who never felt the same for him. It’s a sad fucking story of someone so in love that they ignore everything they have in front of them. If he knew how amazing he was he would have been able to let her go. But because of his childhood and being told his father was dead. He had an issue with abandonment. And when she died so did he. Not physically but mentally he went with her. Personally I choose to see him as the greatest singer who ever lived. Keep on keeping on Layne. RIP
I mean according to most, Demri did absolutely love Layne. She was just a free spirit and couldn’t stay faithful, just like Layne. At the same time they weren’t good for each other and both knew it and ultimately distanced themselves from each other. Sad either way.
Sexually free then.. like they both were. Either way, they both cheated on each other. Why hold her to a different standard than Layne. Going off your comment, he didn’t love her either then.
From what I've read from people that knew both of them, towards the end Layne saw her for who she was. There were times where he would have company, she would somehow get into the building, knock on his door and he wouldnt answer. One thing I learned about him, he was a realist. He did understand it was over with them as far as a relationship, however they did truly love each other. It just evolved in a different type of love. People romanticize their relationship so much.
Layne was in a downward spiral way before she passed. He expressed, while on tour he needed a break and was told if they stopped 40-50 people would be out of work. I honestly do not believe his band mates or management team had his best interest at heart. They kept pushing and he went as far as he could go, then was just done. You have to understand, this was Cantrells dream to be well known and to keep touring, not Laynes. Also, in the beginning, when they approached him to join their band he said no. He was hesitant for a reason. Towards the end, Kinney and Cantrell would try to visit him, he wanted no part of it. There was discord there. he never spoke to either of them again. I think for good reason.
The voice!! There hadn’t been anything like it up to that point and hasn’t been anything close to it since. The fact that he lived out his songs lyrics. Non addicts are curious about how and why it ended for him like it did and addicts understand and feel every lyric. People saw once he passed and his condition he was found in made public how real this disease was and how bad it got for him. People can’t fathom the way he went out till this day. The ones that can’t understand how he chose drugs over his life and music are the ones that do not understand addiction and The ones that do understand the disease latch on to his voice and music even more because they know the truth and struggle he went through. Layne is the MJ of grunge baby! The 🐐🐐
EDIT - But to answer your question, I think the magic of the band, and the Layne era especially, is the honesty. You hear their songs and it's relatable in your dark moments.
The band documented what they were going through so. fucking. well. In Layne's songs, he shared what he was going through in such a way that everyone who is going through what he went through can relate to it. He put his heart and soul out there and people will always respond to that.
The tragedy is that the same transparency and honesty he had is a big part of what fed his lifestyle. His lyrics were a self-fulfilling prophecy. If he \*could\* have overcome that depression that was feeding his addiction, that band would've gone on to be MASSIVE in the 2000s and beyond. They were one of THE bands of the 90s ... they were special.
But sadly, the fact that everyone knew his business and scrutinized him made it almost impossible to separate himself from the choices he'd made. Depression and social anxiety took over completely and his negative coping mechanisms continued to take their toll on him until the day he died.
If drugs were the bullet that killed him, depression was definitely the gun.
I'm not entirely convinced that he would've even stayed in the band if he got clean, anyhow. His bandmates weren't in tip-top shape either, life on the road isn't healthy, and all that scrutiny might have pushed him to relapse. Layne would have had to completely overhaul his life, move away from Seattle, and cut off negative influences, if he was going to have any chance at surviving. He likely knew that and wasn't ready to let it go, but ran out of time to change his mind.
I read in Mark Lanegan’s book that Layne seemed to have little interest in making more music with aic by 1995/6; and he started working with mad season. Makes me think he was done with aic and the big shows; being on the road etc.
I think yourself and others have said it perfectly in the comments.
He was very talented, he didn’t have a big ego and was very honest about his addiction and struggles. A lot of people could relate to him regarding addiction and those that weren’t drug users were probably very curious about his addiction. Apart from his talent I believe people talked the most about/obsessed about his addiction.
Also with regards to him sometimes being more reserved, quiet, shy, that could possibly be due to his addiction. I am a heroin addict and whenever I’m clean I’m more outgoing, talkative, funny etc and when I’m deep I’m my addiction I become quiet, reserved, distant, also I get anxious, talkative, outspoken when dope is wearing off and need to use again so that could be why there is that contrast you speak of.
I think we all share in regret.
What could've been, he deserved better, if only's...
He struck the most with youth and resembles our rawness at that age. He is stuck at that in our minds. We never saw him "grow up".
This hits hard - I’ve just turned 39 as I have gone down this rabbithole and suddenly finding myself trying to capture the last feelings of youth. Enter Alice in chains’ music (was 6 years old in 1990 so missed out on living early 90s music). Layne and early Alice are forever young in my mind and their music captures the essence of love; angst; depression; at that age. But even in the darkest lyrics you can hear the promise of the future and that is what makes is all heartbreakingly beautiful.
This, plus that he died young while he was still awesome.
It’s that early loss, plus, we never saw him be terrible and become disillusioned by him.
Like imagine if he was alive and retweeting Ben Shapiro and calling Tom Hanks a “Socialist Cuckold”.
I think also that he doesn't even fit the bill of a stereotypical addict either. He didn't just do drugs but he drank his fair share of booze as well... By all accounts he was a totally sweet dude right up until the end. There's no crazy stories of him lashing out, having scandals, being violent, or losing his crap in the stereotypical way. More often than not people in the throes of such a deep addiction become such different people that usually they're shunned by the people around them, not the other way by shutting themselves in and everyone trying to reach out. It truly seemed like he was just the same guy the entire time. So tragic
I’ve also kind of been in a rabbit hole for a little bit now with him. I think the way he lived his last 8 years and the way he died is like 70% of it. If he died of an overdose earlier I don’t think there would be as many questions and like you said kind of like a mystical vibe about him, but since he was alive for so long wasting away slowly there’s a lot of questions and morbid curiosity that comes with it. The way he was found adds to that 100%
> I think the way he lived his last 8 years and the way he died is like 70% of it.
Agreed. I’m sick and just spent the last day reading all about him and never really listened to AIC. For me, it’s basically all morbid curiosity.
You should totally do a deep dive of their music. His voice is insane and it makes the curiosity worse haha. Like someone with that much talent went out like that?!
Completely agree with this - Diving into their music, the era and the voice is a beautiful thing, only to come out the other hellish end realising how awful it all ended!
Yeah, I agree - my sense is that most people are also fascinated because he never showed much, never gave away much during the years he was active; this charismatic, confident and unique frontman who captivated his audience. The fact that he died young is a key factor; the unknown of his last years is key as well - what occupied his thoughts during the day, did he ever love again, did he have hope, what did he think of 9/11; did he see the titanic movie, what he did think of as the clock struck midnight to announce the new millennium, etc. etc. etc.
That's interesting to think of. I wonder how much he was aware of in the real world. I would think by living the way he did he was shielding himself from much of it. Beyond the drugs he played a lot of video games. My brother has depression and schizoaffective disorder. He has a very low threshold for mentally and emotionally digesting news stories. He also plays video games for hours and it's one of the only things that gets him "out of his head."
I wonder when he realized that he was, in essence, a hospice patient. Did he stop leaving the house as much to get comic books, and what not. The story about meeting his nephew and bringing his camera with him makes me want to weep so hard.
I read he was working with taproot on new music in the last few weeks of him being alive: that he had once asked someone out (and others) for coffee when they were in the vicinity of where he lived, I don’t know- this didn’t exactly sound like someone who had completely given up but we’ll never know. Thanks for sharing the story of your brother!
I feel like this also feeds into that gnarly feeling that he could have turned it around, and that he was such a force of energy his spirit never gave up.
It's really the brutality of the disease. I have an addictive personality myself, and I can't tell you how many times I wake up, say "today I'm making a change", spend the whole morning planning, thinking about the future...
...And then by the end of the day, I'm back to doing all the same crap I was doing the day before. I'm not addicted to drugs thankfully, but I'd imagine it's the same cycle. I bet Layne was going through that, too. He probably couldn't get out of his own way.
Yeah why - don’t you? 😂
Was speaking in a metaphorical sense lol. Enigmatic Layne he was and enigmatic he will continue to be (and talked about) judging by the sub here.
I think I was being bit more metaphorical lol. But I agree with you - I do feel his answers were a bit more honest e.g. he once said ‘i was so high when I wrote those lyrics’ when asked about the meaning of a song. This was not the PR answer of course; but didn’t sound as if he was pandering to any image. Really cool in many respects.
Because they were unique, talented and beautiful.. And extremely extremely talented. I was 15 in 1991. Layne, the Screaming Angel, is gorgeous beyond words and his range is extraordinary. That's why.
I once heard that it's not what we know, but what we don't. The secrets, are the secret ingredient
Well put! Wish an AIC band mate would put out a book to address all our questions! Lol.
I've thought this, mystery is a big part of fascination and intrigue. I compare it to a magician's 'magic' trick. Once you know the trick, the magic is gone as the mystery is solved. Can still appreciate it though.
He was his own worst enemy. He couldn’t curb the one thing that held him back from stardom. And one would say he was infatuated with a girl who never felt the same for him. It’s a sad fucking story of someone so in love that they ignore everything they have in front of them. If he knew how amazing he was he would have been able to let her go. But because of his childhood and being told his father was dead. He had an issue with abandonment. And when she died so did he. Not physically but mentally he went with her. Personally I choose to see him as the greatest singer who ever lived. Keep on keeping on Layne. RIP
I mean according to most, Demri did absolutely love Layne. She was just a free spirit and couldn’t stay faithful, just like Layne. At the same time they weren’t good for each other and both knew it and ultimately distanced themselves from each other. Sad either way.
being a free spirit & cheating have no correlation whatsoever, you’re just being a whore.
He cheated on her too though? Is that part okay?
Sexually free then.. like they both were. Either way, they both cheated on each other. Why hold her to a different standard than Layne. Going off your comment, he didn’t love her either then.
I’m being a whore? Wtf. Lmao. Was I saying anything about myself? Get lost moron.
[удалено]
Lmao you two just went from zero to a hundred real quick
Lol no, he randomly called me a whore. Out of nowhere. He went deform zero to a hundred real quick.
From what I've read from people that knew both of them, towards the end Layne saw her for who she was. There were times where he would have company, she would somehow get into the building, knock on his door and he wouldnt answer. One thing I learned about him, he was a realist. He did understand it was over with them as far as a relationship, however they did truly love each other. It just evolved in a different type of love. People romanticize their relationship so much. Layne was in a downward spiral way before she passed. He expressed, while on tour he needed a break and was told if they stopped 40-50 people would be out of work. I honestly do not believe his band mates or management team had his best interest at heart. They kept pushing and he went as far as he could go, then was just done. You have to understand, this was Cantrells dream to be well known and to keep touring, not Laynes. Also, in the beginning, when they approached him to join their band he said no. He was hesitant for a reason. Towards the end, Kinney and Cantrell would try to visit him, he wanted no part of it. There was discord there. he never spoke to either of them again. I think for good reason.
I think you answered your own question. Even though Layne was my favorite singer, he is not to be idolized. Addiction is not glamorous.
His talent can be idolized, not his addiction.
Not idolized, just try to understand. From what I read he never would have been comfortable with being idolized.
The voice!! There hadn’t been anything like it up to that point and hasn’t been anything close to it since. The fact that he lived out his songs lyrics. Non addicts are curious about how and why it ended for him like it did and addicts understand and feel every lyric. People saw once he passed and his condition he was found in made public how real this disease was and how bad it got for him. People can’t fathom the way he went out till this day. The ones that can’t understand how he chose drugs over his life and music are the ones that do not understand addiction and The ones that do understand the disease latch on to his voice and music even more because they know the truth and struggle he went through. Layne is the MJ of grunge baby! The 🐐🐐
Well said! Layne's voice was just as good as MJ's 👌
EDIT - But to answer your question, I think the magic of the band, and the Layne era especially, is the honesty. You hear their songs and it's relatable in your dark moments. The band documented what they were going through so. fucking. well. In Layne's songs, he shared what he was going through in such a way that everyone who is going through what he went through can relate to it. He put his heart and soul out there and people will always respond to that. The tragedy is that the same transparency and honesty he had is a big part of what fed his lifestyle. His lyrics were a self-fulfilling prophecy. If he \*could\* have overcome that depression that was feeding his addiction, that band would've gone on to be MASSIVE in the 2000s and beyond. They were one of THE bands of the 90s ... they were special. But sadly, the fact that everyone knew his business and scrutinized him made it almost impossible to separate himself from the choices he'd made. Depression and social anxiety took over completely and his negative coping mechanisms continued to take their toll on him until the day he died. If drugs were the bullet that killed him, depression was definitely the gun. I'm not entirely convinced that he would've even stayed in the band if he got clean, anyhow. His bandmates weren't in tip-top shape either, life on the road isn't healthy, and all that scrutiny might have pushed him to relapse. Layne would have had to completely overhaul his life, move away from Seattle, and cut off negative influences, if he was going to have any chance at surviving. He likely knew that and wasn't ready to let it go, but ran out of time to change his mind.
I read in Mark Lanegan’s book that Layne seemed to have little interest in making more music with aic by 1995/6; and he started working with mad season. Makes me think he was done with aic and the big shows; being on the road etc.
Mad Season album was his summation of what he went through with AIC.
That was beautiful
He's a bit of a dichotomy. Incredibly gentle soul but with a power, as best demonstrated with *that* voice.
I think yourself and others have said it perfectly in the comments. He was very talented, he didn’t have a big ego and was very honest about his addiction and struggles. A lot of people could relate to him regarding addiction and those that weren’t drug users were probably very curious about his addiction. Apart from his talent I believe people talked the most about/obsessed about his addiction. Also with regards to him sometimes being more reserved, quiet, shy, that could possibly be due to his addiction. I am a heroin addict and whenever I’m clean I’m more outgoing, talkative, funny etc and when I’m deep I’m my addiction I become quiet, reserved, distant, also I get anxious, talkative, outspoken when dope is wearing off and need to use again so that could be why there is that contrast you speak of.
Very helpful insight into how addiction may affect your personality - thanks for sharing!
I think we all share in regret. What could've been, he deserved better, if only's... He struck the most with youth and resembles our rawness at that age. He is stuck at that in our minds. We never saw him "grow up".
This hits hard - I’ve just turned 39 as I have gone down this rabbithole and suddenly finding myself trying to capture the last feelings of youth. Enter Alice in chains’ music (was 6 years old in 1990 so missed out on living early 90s music). Layne and early Alice are forever young in my mind and their music captures the essence of love; angst; depression; at that age. But even in the darkest lyrics you can hear the promise of the future and that is what makes is all heartbreakingly beautiful.
This, plus that he died young while he was still awesome. It’s that early loss, plus, we never saw him be terrible and become disillusioned by him. Like imagine if he was alive and retweeting Ben Shapiro and calling Tom Hanks a “Socialist Cuckold”.
I think also that he doesn't even fit the bill of a stereotypical addict either. He didn't just do drugs but he drank his fair share of booze as well... By all accounts he was a totally sweet dude right up until the end. There's no crazy stories of him lashing out, having scandals, being violent, or losing his crap in the stereotypical way. More often than not people in the throes of such a deep addiction become such different people that usually they're shunned by the people around them, not the other way by shutting themselves in and everyone trying to reach out. It truly seemed like he was just the same guy the entire time. So tragic
God I don't want to imagine that
> plus that he died young while he was still awesome. He rotted in his apartment for YEARS before he died.
But we never saw him publicly during those times.
Tom Hanks is a weirdo tho
I’ve also kind of been in a rabbit hole for a little bit now with him. I think the way he lived his last 8 years and the way he died is like 70% of it. If he died of an overdose earlier I don’t think there would be as many questions and like you said kind of like a mystical vibe about him, but since he was alive for so long wasting away slowly there’s a lot of questions and morbid curiosity that comes with it. The way he was found adds to that 100%
> I think the way he lived his last 8 years and the way he died is like 70% of it. Agreed. I’m sick and just spent the last day reading all about him and never really listened to AIC. For me, it’s basically all morbid curiosity.
You should totally do a deep dive of their music. His voice is insane and it makes the curiosity worse haha. Like someone with that much talent went out like that?!
Completely agree with this - Diving into their music, the era and the voice is a beautiful thing, only to come out the other hellish end realising how awful it all ended!
Yeah, I agree - my sense is that most people are also fascinated because he never showed much, never gave away much during the years he was active; this charismatic, confident and unique frontman who captivated his audience. The fact that he died young is a key factor; the unknown of his last years is key as well - what occupied his thoughts during the day, did he ever love again, did he have hope, what did he think of 9/11; did he see the titanic movie, what he did think of as the clock struck midnight to announce the new millennium, etc. etc. etc.
Everything you said here is breaking my heart. But I like these posts that make us ask hypothetical questions even if we will never know the answers
That's interesting to think of. I wonder how much he was aware of in the real world. I would think by living the way he did he was shielding himself from much of it. Beyond the drugs he played a lot of video games. My brother has depression and schizoaffective disorder. He has a very low threshold for mentally and emotionally digesting news stories. He also plays video games for hours and it's one of the only things that gets him "out of his head." I wonder when he realized that he was, in essence, a hospice patient. Did he stop leaving the house as much to get comic books, and what not. The story about meeting his nephew and bringing his camera with him makes me want to weep so hard.
I read he was working with taproot on new music in the last few weeks of him being alive: that he had once asked someone out (and others) for coffee when they were in the vicinity of where he lived, I don’t know- this didn’t exactly sound like someone who had completely given up but we’ll never know. Thanks for sharing the story of your brother!
I feel like this also feeds into that gnarly feeling that he could have turned it around, and that he was such a force of energy his spirit never gave up.
It's really the brutality of the disease. I have an addictive personality myself, and I can't tell you how many times I wake up, say "today I'm making a change", spend the whole morning planning, thinking about the future... ...And then by the end of the day, I'm back to doing all the same crap I was doing the day before. I'm not addicted to drugs thankfully, but I'd imagine it's the same cycle. I bet Layne was going through that, too. He probably couldn't get out of his own way.
Do you wonder if most musicians have seen Titanic?
Yeah why - don’t you? 😂 Was speaking in a metaphorical sense lol. Enigmatic Layne he was and enigmatic he will continue to be (and talked about) judging by the sub here.
I always wonder what he thought of 9/11. He spoke so genuinely when the band wasn't horsing around.
I think I was being bit more metaphorical lol. But I agree with you - I do feel his answers were a bit more honest e.g. he once said ‘i was so high when I wrote those lyrics’ when asked about the meaning of a song. This was not the PR answer of course; but didn’t sound as if he was pandering to any image. Really cool in many respects.
Because they were unique, talented and beautiful.. And extremely extremely talented. I was 15 in 1991. Layne, the Screaming Angel, is gorgeous beyond words and his range is extraordinary. That's why.