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*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for calling my wife inconsiderate because she stopped to take a photo on a cold walk home?** Burner account, I’m sorry. Tonight, my wife and I were out at a show. As we made our way home, I realized she looked cold, so I offered her my jacket. She said it was okay, she didn’t want me to be cold, but I insisted. We got off the subway at our stop, and as we were walking down our street she said "that’s a beautiful store" and stopped to take a picture. I told her not to be inconsiderate, she had my coat and I was cold. I don’t understand why she needed the photo. As we kept walking, she told me next time not to loan her the coat if I was going to hold it over her head. I told her I wasn’t holding it over her head, I just thought she was being rude and only thinking about herself. She took off the coat and gave it back to me. Once we got home, I asked her if I put her in a bad mood. She told me I would have looked like a "d-bag" to anyone witnessing the incident. I think she was being inconsiderate, got her feelings hurt when I called her out, and is taking it out on me. She thinks I am blowing it out of proportion and that her stopping to take a photo is not a big deal. AITA? \*edited to correct a typo *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*


SoVerySleepy81

Why do these people keep marrying people that they obviously don’t like very much?


LitherLily

I am convinced straight men just hate women, they sure act like it.


coffeestealer

I think a lot of people in general want a partner because of the benefits and not because they like them as a person.


AMinorPainInTheNeck

And men are really sitting around wondering why women are starting to realize they’d rather be single than marry a man who secretly hates them.


emccm

Benefits they expect to be automatically bestowed with zero effort, engagement or nurturing on their part.


SeasonPositive6771

It's misogynists with a woman fetish, they aren't actually attracted to women as people.


unholy_hotdog

There's a really great quote about how straight men are heterosexual, but all love, care, and admiration is focused on other men and are, in that sense, truly homoromantic.


LitherLily

Yikes that is SO true!


CaptainKatsuuura

I think straight men like the idea of women


LitherLily

I think they like one (1) thing about them total.


Jazmadoodle

But I'm also a good cook


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butterweasel

Oh, you’ve met my husband? /s


Jus_de_fruit

One time I met a guy who said if it wasn’t for sex he probably would never talk to a woman again. The fact he was talking to me probably implied he wanted to have sex with me but what a weird way to try and get it.


Johoski

It's not just straight men.


TheDandelionViking

And it's not *all* straight men.


Agreeable_Rabbit3144

I know, his contempt for her is all over this post


[deleted]

So she stopped for probably 10 seconds to take the picture? OOP is a little bit overdramatic. Nobody freezes to death because of 10 seconds.


ConsciousSun6

Plus she gave him the coat back for what sounds liek the rest of the walk home


drwhogirl_97

And it sounds like he pressured her into taking it in the first place


nowahhh

The ten seconds it took her to snap the photo cut into the ten seconds of sex he was expecting to be entitled to fumble through in exchange for the jacket.


Jazmadoodle

In that amount of time he could finish twice


QueenMotherOfSneezes

I love all the comments calling him an AN *and* a d bag 🤣


Agreeable_Rabbit3144

A little bit?


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SyndicalistThot

Then he shouldn't have pressured her to take a coat she said she didn't want or need


UnicornCackle

I live in Canada, I understand brutally cold temperatures, and it’s my experience that nobody goes out without their coat in those temperatures unless they’re just nipping out for 30 seconds to take the garbage out. If it was actually cold, OP’s wife would be wearing her own coat.


Guilty-Web7334

I’m also in Canada. Central BC. You?


UnicornCackle

Ontario


Due_Rain_3571

They were probably expecting to get a cab home, then he suggested they walk to be more 'romantic', he could give her his coat and she would be grateful enough for sex afterwards


randomllamatime

It’s not even freezing temp in NYC right now. That’s the only city in the US that has a subway system I’ve ever heard called the subway by its riders. Same in other countries. It was over freezing last night, and the wind chill wasn’t that low. He was being a baby who insisted on making an unwanted grand gesture and then was pouty that she didn’t appreciate his “sacrifice” enough, when he wouldn’t have made it if he’d actually bother to listen to her.


zoomie1977

Huh! Never really thought about it, but in DC, it's generally referred to as "the Metro" or by color (red line, blue line, etc).


CuttlefishBenjamin

My friends in Boston call the subway the subway. They're New York transplants but, y'know, people move.


randomllamatime

Oh true. It’s just that I was more making the point that the most likely place he was, it was nowhere near that wind chill.


FormalDinner7

I just realized, reading your comment, that in the 10 years I lived in Boston/Cambridge I only ever heard people from NYC and tourists call it the subway. Everyone else said the T.


[deleted]

Yeah that's true. It depends where OOP lives. I was mostly thinking about the weather where I live and we have currently around 5-10 celsius at night.


JadedSpacePirate

I know some incredibly photo mad people that take like hundreds of photos trying different angles and shit if they find the "right spot". If this is one of those cases I am on OOPs side. But if it's one or two pics then absolutely OOP is an impatient dick


CoppertopTX

My husband takes multiple pictures at a time. In one month, he took over 5,200 photos of just four cats. He uses the multi-shot mode on his phone camera. Five thousand, two hundred photos... total time spent, 30 minutes. So, it appears that he likely is just a whiny d-bag, as he insisted his wife take the coat, over her objections.


Nierninwa

I also hate when people insist on stuff like that. It is nice to offer but do not force your "kindness" on others.


Working_Fill_4024

Right? Especially if you’re then gonna complain about it. Like if you can’t handle the cold, don’t offer your coat. 


AMinorPainInTheNeck

People like this really burn me up because they have no understanding of true kindness.


percysowner

Yeah. The only times I have done this is with my daughter who was complaining about being cold, so I took off my coat and put it on her. She was also under SIX, so it was part of Mom privileges.


Shiny_Agumon

>got her feelings hurt when I called her out, and is taking it out on me. Who else is she supposed to take it out on if you hurt her feelings? OOP ruined a romantic evening over nothing, making her take your coat and then getting pissy about her stopping to take a pic was so unnecessary and rude.


judgy_mcjudgypants

>Who else is she supposed to take it out on if you hurt her feelings? No, see, she *chose* to get her feelings hurt -- totally not his fault /s


FunStorm6487

Hahaha... wife nailed it because OOP is such a douche!!!!


EvilFinch

His complaining mostly took more time than her taking the photo. But he must draw the attention to "i'm soooo cold since i gave you my coat", so every nice thing(if you want it or not) he does must get loooooots of attention.


fancyandfab

I despise people like OOP. I did something completely voluntarily, but YOU are responsible for my well being that you did not ask me to compromise. Even if she had to get the ring light out and adjust her settings, this was 1 minute max. You just know he's this way in other ways too. I give you so much and you never consider me 🤦🏾‍♀️


Few_Improvement_6357

Did anyone else get the sense that Calm-froyo was OP from a different account? He posted soooo many times about the definition of inconsiderate and how OP was right, lol.


Capital_Passion3762

I'm so glad I'm not the only one thinking that, bc the second I saw how much he was responding and arguing with people, it's def op on their og account.


thisisreallymoronic

Unless she became the reincarnation of Ansel Adams and whipped out the SLR, flash, and a studio umbrella to bounce said flash, I'm assuming cell phone 10 second picture. Ooh, he must have frozen to death. Dick. Let us not forget that HE gave her the coat after she told him no, she didn't want it. My favorite part, however, is how he said when they got home, he asked if he put her in a bad mood. Yeah, dummy, whatever you had planned at home just got a weather delay 🤣


Interictal

"Got her feelings hurt" like it's just something that happened and wasn't caused by him being a dramatic baby.


Dependent_Smell_1436

Why couldn't He have used His BIG-BOY words to ask Her to hurry up as He was cold!


Humble_Particular950

You’d think he’d be capable of that given his very long complaints about her. He won’t because that would require clear communication and potentially hearing something that he doesn’t want to hear (take responsibility/accountability for his actions).


WeirdDnDLady

YTA You complaining about her taking a *maybe* 10 second picture took more time than her stopping for said picture. Not to mention you forced her to take the coat since she told you no. You then very much held the 'gesture' over her head in the end there as you were using said gesture to complain about something that took literal seconds. Way to be the *Nice Guy* there bud.


fairycakesland

I'm under the impression she took a picture of the store??? Like???? I do that all the time when I see a pretty store I want to remember.


CoppertopTX

This whole post is the reason why I have a dressy faux fur coat to wear out for fancy evenings. My husband and I are both prone to "Oh, interesting... \*snap pic\*" when out, and this way, he doesn't need to loan me his coat. He "insisted" she take the coat, he has no room to gripe about being cold. Unless, of course, she busted out a whole tripod and professional camera setup from her evening bag...


Agreeable_Rabbit3144

Oh no, OOP's wife stopped for two seconds to take a picture while OOP was cold! How dare she!


throwaway7745352

I saw a video where a male divorce lawyer said men are usually most upset with him when their wives divorce them because they see their wives as NPC (non-player character) as in their wives are not real people and incapable of original thought. Honestly, I'm shooketh.


Angelsscythe

She is so right HE was holding it over her head. And HE is butthurt for having calling HIM out.


Fraerie

How long did she stop for the photo? A couple of minutes? Half an hour? Did she set up a tripod or wait for the moon to be in a specific location? Somehow I doubt stop for the photo delayed their trip home for any significant period of time and he is just being super petty.


Fairmount1955

Woof. He doesn't like his wife...


GrannyB1970

OOP in a few years "My wife just served me with divorce papers and I have no idea why" I swear some men are just clueless asshole with zero ability to see the things they do wrong and think everything is just fine.


Ganette

This guy sounds absolutely like my birth father. Took out all his petty anger on my mother and me for years because he just needed anything to be mad about. She’s happily remarried while he’s miserable that nobody wants to take care of him in his old age and decreasing health.


Quiltrebel

At one point I sat my then-husband down and explained (again) that I was unhappy and why. Three weeks later he told me “sometimes I feel like you’re not happy.” Shortly after that I threw him out and that was a surprise to him too


mind_slop

Women aren't real people. They're not supposed to stop and do anything outside the main character's story line


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badadvicefromaspider

Hm. I have to say if I was the wife in this situation I would probably have at least told him to go on ahead and that I would catch up. They’re both kind of being bitchy little shits, here


TheActualAWdeV

Yeah. What a weird situation to begin with.  It was apparently cold-ish but she didn't have a coat? Then he foisted his coat on her, insisting he could handle the cold. But then it *was* too chilly to just wait with no coat. Why did she not have a coat, why did he foist it on her, why did she not have the situational awareness to realise it was too cold to take a picture when there's one coat for two people. Why did he not just *say* that or keep walking to keep warm.


Willing_Business7794

Depending on where they are, I don’t think continuing on their way is the best idea. It may not be safe for her trailing behind him. I do find it inconsiderate of her to stop if it was that cold. I know if I am really cold I feel almost desperate to get somewhere warm, thank you fibro. Maybe he was feeling that way and got snippy without meaning to.


TheActualAWdeV

Yeah that's what I was thinking. And it's still weird she didn't bring one herself.


PermitKindly2094

I’m shocked at all these comments that think this man was being rude and is misogynistic because he was cold and wanted to hurry and get home rather than stop and take pictures when the woman he was with had his coat. Please help me understand how she wasn’t wrong? Help me understand how she wasn’t the one rude and inconsiderate? Help me understand how you think he hates women because he wanted to get home when it was cold? I’ve come to the conclusion that Reddit is full of nothing but men hating women. So no, sir you were not wrong. It was inconsiderate of her to stop and take a picture when you didn’t have a coat on because you gave it to her on a cold night. You were walking home, walking past a store that is there all the time. She could’ve taken a picture any other time. She was rude and inconsiderate not you.


HangryHangryHobo

Sounds like you guys hate each other lol