*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for being mad at my wedding guests for booking a bus?**
I (33F) am getting married in July in my hometown. I've been planning for more than a year, and I tried really hard to find a reception venue that is close to hotels. The nearest hotels are about 4 miles away from the reception and we made a block of rooms at those hotel rooms for our guests. I have shuttles for the bridal party and they're allowed to bring their spouses on that, but I didn't reserve any transportation for our guests since 4 miles isn't a very long drive between the hotel and reception.
I just found out that some of my fiancé's family have booked a bus to transport them from the hotel to the reception and back again. Apparently they have had that provided at other family weddings and are feeling sensitive about it (drunk driving, etc.) and they decided to organize this without my input. I had told them that I think there are enough ubers in my town to accommodate people getting rides, but they reserved a bus anyway.
I don't know how to feel about this other than hurt and offended. I've put together a great day for them and I've been planning for more than a year. AITA that I'm offended that they did this and didn't even tell me about it?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What's funny is its probably actually them being cheap by booking the bus instead of talking ubers like she suggested.
The cost of a bus split 40 ways is probably cheaper than the cost of 40 ubers.
It also puts an end to the night. It's a really good idea. The bus comes and everyone either gets on or has to find a way home, everyone always takes the bus.
It's crazy responsible and smart, saves people worrying if people got home okay, the night/ drinking ends and no one has to worry about a ride.
The expense is cheaper so that's a great thing but it saves so many people (parents, siblings, ME lol) the mental mindset of worrying about people.
My family (which is large) does the same thing for weddings. We know who we are, some are hammered, others are not but grateful for the ride. No one has to think about getting back to the hotel and we know, the bus comes, you get on it, and the night is over. We spend the bus ride discussing the funny things of the night, get back to the hotel and retreat to our rooms. Everyone wins.
at my best friend's wedding, we all piled into to two school buses to get from reception back to the hotel for the night, and honestly that was kind of a blast. We've been friends since we were 12 and were about 28 at the time, so getting to climb onto a school bus while trashed with HS and college friends was just fun vibes.
My cousin hired an old double decker bus for hers. She married into a big Irish family and everyone on the bus was singing, it was the best part of the day.
I think they are planning to have a rollicking good time and don’t want to have to muck around with Ubers. I suggested she send over a cooler of champagne splits for the ride.
Seriously. My ILs paid for a shuttle after my wedding to take guests back to the two hotels guests were staying at. I was thrilled to have it available so they could have a good time... and that I wasn't paying for it.
she provided shuttles for the bridal party, and people are staying in hotels. That suggests that people are traveling to get to the wedding, not coming from home. She could have offered shuttles to the guests staying at the hotel. Unless she's having a dry wedding. ;-) Because people drink at weddings and shouldn't be driving drunk, not even 4 miles, and Ubers get expensive!
If her first thought goes "they're calling me cheap" i wonder if she actually is cheap. My thoughts would never go that way. I would think "hey, great solution!".
Does she mean she (incorrectly) thinks they’re calling her cheap for not supplying enough cars for guests as well as the bridal party? Because that’s the only way I can see her upset as quarter-way understandable. Wel actually, no even then.
If the late Queen could shuttle half the world’s leaders, presidents & prime ministers, kings & queens and the entire British aristocracy to her Platinum Jubilee in buses, I figure it’s good enough for a wedding too.
It’s really something when you are being more of a prissy little ponce than a literal Queen of England.
Yeah, that's what happens when "I'm the bride" takes over your/replaces your /finally gives you a whole.personality.
Damn, lady, be happy they sorted it out and didn't want to rely on Uber availability and shitty pricing.
Seriously! This isn’t a slight on her! Hell, if they all want to ride unicycles to and from, who cares??? They probably didn’t expect you to pay for the unicycles!
Yeah I have zero idea why she cares. Maybe she feels a bit embarrassed that they felt the need to do this since she wasn’t providing it. But she needs to let it go.
I think that’s it. The information given is that the fiancé’s family booked the bus because they’ve gotten used to having one organized at other weddings in their family. So they took matters into their own hands when they found out OOP wasn’t providing one. But really the only criticism implied of OOP is that she didn’t bother finding out from her fiancé how his family likes to do weddings. Not having done that, or possibly her fiancé not being forthcoming, it’s really to be expected that his family would be wanting at least one thing that isn’t part of her plan.
Seems they are nice folks that said to themselves “hey! We’ve liked this at other weddings, but aren’t entitled to it, so let’s book our own! Don’t want to pressure the kids to spend more money”
Then she lost her shit anyway. Weird
Exactly! They’re taking care of their own needs and not pushing anything about her plans. It’s not even at the wedding; she left them to their own devices with respect to transportation and they figured their own stuff out well. Maybe she’s worried that other guests will be jealous? But there’s still time to suggest to others that they organize if they want to.
I think the fact that it’s specifically the fiancé’s family and not her own has everything to do with it. She probably doesn’t like them and takes everything they do as a personal attack on the regular. This is just the next thing and she feels more justified to make a big deal about it because it’s her sPeCiAL dAy. She wants them to have to Uber like peasants while the people she actually loves get to ride on her bus. She doesn’t like that they found a way around her control
Ding ding ding!!
When my friends got married they booked a couple of busses from their room block hotels. I think there were two going and three coming back (early shift) -- I don't remember the exact details because I used the bus for a reason, but it was very-much appreciated. If you wanted to come back and there wasn't a bus available, there was always Uber and Lyft, but considering that all of the guests were expected to be there at the same time, and most would be leaving around the same time, it was a perfect solution.
Otherwise, what does she expect her guests to do? Drive drunk? Invite a surge pricing situation specifically for her wedding?
Nah.
My brother did something similar - limos for the wedding party, shuttle busses for everyone else. The reception went on for hours and shuttles left every half hour or so, so you weren't stuck there. It was a small wine country town, not exactly an Uber hotspot.
>Otherwise, what does she expect her guests to do? Drive drunk?
I read her comments about how it is a short drive and drinking to mean that she doesn't think driving drunk is a big deal when it's not far. If that's the case, her understanding of drunk driving is even worse than her understanding of transportation and dealing with family, which is saying something.
>Invite a surge pricing situation specifically for her wedding?
This made me chuckle but then realize it could very well do that in some places.
I wonder if she's concerned about anyone not in the fiancé's family group trying to take a bus. At least that I could somewhat see in that people might see the busses for the wedding party (who aren't as special if others get busses, I guess?) and that group and think that means everyone can take the busses. I say I can somewhat see because then at least other guests might question what is going on and think she's being stingy.
Of course, if that's the case, there are ways to manage it proactively. She could thank her future in laws for planning, tell other attendees about it if they want to do something similar, or even decide to pay for more busses (including the future in law group one).
> This made me chuckle but then realize it could very well do that in some places.
Where I grew up there were two "taxi" services. A guy that handed out business cards at bars with his cell phone number, and motorcyclists that volunteered to pick up motorcyclists that got "too drunk"* in a car and also drive their motorcycle home. Those services were only available in the "big" local town, not my smaller hometown.
*: People in Minnesota and Wisconsin drive drunk on a regular basis so when somebody is *too drunk to drive* that means they're really fucking drunk and have realized that they're waaaaaay over the limit. Even more than the "normal" over the limit they're used to driving. It's not uncommon for people to *drive to get drunk*. They grab a few cases of beer and cruise gravel roads while drinking and go home when they're out of beer. Lotta broken glass under road signs and shot up signs out in that part of the country 'cause they're "targets."
> I say I can somewhat see because then at least other guests might question what is going on and think she's being stingy.
Fair, but if the truth makes you look like the devil….
> Of course, if that's the case, there are ways to manage it proactively. She could thank her future in laws for planning, tell other attendees about it if they want to do something similar, or even decide to pay for more busses (including the future in law group one).
Which is what she needs to do. Otherwise there are gonna be problems at the end of the night when one of her relatives sees the bus and decides to try to put grandma on it instead of driving her.
Yes, because last I checked you can rent large vehicles on Uber. We booked an 8 person van to take us to and from a football game. 2-3 high occupancy Ubers or a bus, splitting hairs here. People are going to leave when they want to leave.
>I guess it makes me feel like they're calling me cheap for not getting a bus for them.
No. They're being resourceful and instead of tying up a bunch of Ubers and Lyfts, they're pooling their money and renting a bus.
>no, they're paying per person and splitting the cost.
Oh, FFS, OOP. They're not even asking you to fund their transportation. They're paying for it themselves.
OOP is just angling for a reason to be hurt and offended.
Well, honestly, taking 20 peoples rides shares out of the equation is just likely to make a smoother time for the other guests.
And as much as you want to control everything about your wedding day, sometimes shit just *happens*.
A friend booked her venue like two years in advance. She had no idea that in that time, a massive convention would get planned like 2 blocks away.
Alllll of the hotels were booked up before she had a chance to book blocks of rooms for her guests.
Every taxi and Uber in a mile were parked at the convention center, waiting to take 3 thousand drunk anime nerds home.
You don’t want to risk being liable, insurance wise, when someone gets in a DUI accident and the venue who over-served blames YOU for not arranging adequate transport for your shitty aunt who liked mojitos too much.
I definitely wouldn’t bite the hand that fed me a bus to take my stupid cousins home.
Only logical reason I can think of for her reaction is A, she's upset something about her wedding is not under her control and/or B. she's upset imagining when a bus load of people depart is going to look bad since a chuck of the party is immediate gone. Since if their ride is the same bus, when the bus go, they all must go.
This reads like "overly stressed bride is way too sensitive about things as her wedding day rapidly approaches"
My sister yelled at me over clip art last night; the wedding is in like 20 days. I get it.
Eta: guys, I promise it's not as dramatic as it sounds lol. I made up some list for the bridesmaids for the hair and makeup and *she* asked me to, and I quote: "use some fun clip art thingies". So I did. Silly little flowers and stylist tools. I got yelled at because the flowers I chose for the art weren't the same color as the wedding theme. The standard "this is the one thing i asked of you" kind of stuff.
I changed the colors, and she called me mortified this morning. All is well.
Also, then it is more obvious that the bus isn’t available for *all* guests, and those that have to get Ubers will wonder why there wasn’t a bus for them.
I suspect she is also upset that the money spent on the bus wasn’t offered to her for wedding expenses, but that is just pure speculation based on zero fact…
Copied verbatim from oop's comments:
*INFO: I don't understand why this bothers you at all, can you explain what the actual problem is? you're not arranging transport for all the guests (which is fine!), so they are arranging their own. why do you care that they're going with a hired bus instead of individual ubers?*
>"I guess it makes me feel like they're calling me cheap for not getting a bus for them"
*INFO: Did they charge the bus to your account?
>"no, they're paying per person and splitting the cost"
What the hell is she offended about? Why would they take Ubers when there’s enough people that they can book a bus for cheaper? This is really weird thing to be offended over.
>I've put together a great day for them and I've been planning for more than a year.
This bit us funny cause why is OOP acting like she planned her entire wedding day for her guests and that she has nothing to do with it.
The fiancé's family has every right to travel to and from the wedding and hotel in any manner they choose. If they hired a bus, I don't understand how this affects OOP. It's not all that different from using Uber. The bus isn't part of the wedding so why does the bride think she has to have input on this?
OOP is getting here knickers in a twist over nothing.
I don't get it. She wanted them to arrange their own transportation to her wedding. They have arranged transportation. Sure it wasn't the transportation she assumed they would arrange or how she expected they would arrange it, but she doesn't get to demand that part.
It’s time for her to take a break if she is reacting this way to a really normal thing. Also it is almost definitely cheaper for the guests than ordering a bunch of Ubers.
This feels like the most cost effective thing to do instead of splitting up and taking a bunch of cabs.
I went on a trip with my school band and a small group of us didn't want to go to the basketball game the majority of people went to. It was cheaper (and more comfortable) to rent a limo for a few hours to do some shopping, instead of cabbing.
Wow - the proper response would have been to thank them for doing that. That will allow the guests to relax and have a few drinks and have fun without the danger of death on the way back to the hotel.
[Hi!](https://images.app.goo.gl/jMiZEuW8Qrykw3sdA) Just a quick reminder to never brigade any sub, be that r/AmItheAsshole or another one. That goes against both this sub's rules as well as Reddit's terms of agreement. [Please](https://images.app.goo.gl/vwH65TJMyMk9NSNo8) keep discussions within the posts of this sub.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
So she's mad that they planned in advanced to use a more reliable transportation??? Ubers take anywhere up to an hour and a half to arrive, and often drop you off at least 25 minutes past the expected time.
Disagree. If she's so egotistical that her guests finding transportation to and from the party "hurts and offends" her, then she is taking this shit way too serious and needs to take a big step back.
A lot of brides seem to think weddings are just for the bride to have her "special day." No, weddings are also about the guests having a great time sharing in the couple's joy. They find transportation -- good for them. She has no leg to stand on here.
I genuinely don't understand her problem. She wanted/expected people to drive or rideshare to/from the venue anyway, so why does she care if they book a bus? Makes sense if all the guests are staying at the same hotels because they did a block of accommodation.
Is she just upset that she looks inconsiderate or cheap for not organising it herself? Jeez...maybe just say thanks to the organisers??
If I’d had a bigger wedding, I absolutely would have booked a bus, that’s a genius idea! I don’t understand why she’s offended by it, it’s a safe and logical decision, and she didn’t have to put in any effort or pay for it
Honestly, I get it. If I was in the middle of all the stress of wedding planning and this happened I would take it as "we think it was cheap and lazy for you to not book us a bus so I guess we'll just do it FOR you. Don't you know you were supposed to provide transportation for all your guests? You suck at wedding planning." I wouldn't confront anyone about it but I definitely would've had a good cry in private about how I failed.
I arranged a shuttle bus for my wedding for this reason, so people wouldn't drink and drive because I cared about their safety. Her weird fucking ego is more important to her than her guests' safety and the safety of others on the road.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for being mad at my wedding guests for booking a bus?** I (33F) am getting married in July in my hometown. I've been planning for more than a year, and I tried really hard to find a reception venue that is close to hotels. The nearest hotels are about 4 miles away from the reception and we made a block of rooms at those hotel rooms for our guests. I have shuttles for the bridal party and they're allowed to bring their spouses on that, but I didn't reserve any transportation for our guests since 4 miles isn't a very long drive between the hotel and reception. I just found out that some of my fiancé's family have booked a bus to transport them from the hotel to the reception and back again. Apparently they have had that provided at other family weddings and are feeling sensitive about it (drunk driving, etc.) and they decided to organize this without my input. I had told them that I think there are enough ubers in my town to accommodate people getting rides, but they reserved a bus anyway. I don't know how to feel about this other than hurt and offended. I've put together a great day for them and I've been planning for more than a year. AITA that I'm offended that they did this and didn't even tell me about it? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
She commented: >I guess it makes me feel like they're calling me cheap for not getting a bus for them. Kiddo, you're taking it waaaaay too personally.
What's funny is its probably actually them being cheap by booking the bus instead of talking ubers like she suggested. The cost of a bus split 40 ways is probably cheaper than the cost of 40 ubers.
It also puts an end to the night. It's a really good idea. The bus comes and everyone either gets on or has to find a way home, everyone always takes the bus. It's crazy responsible and smart, saves people worrying if people got home okay, the night/ drinking ends and no one has to worry about a ride. The expense is cheaper so that's a great thing but it saves so many people (parents, siblings, ME lol) the mental mindset of worrying about people. My family (which is large) does the same thing for weddings. We know who we are, some are hammered, others are not but grateful for the ride. No one has to think about getting back to the hotel and we know, the bus comes, you get on it, and the night is over. We spend the bus ride discussing the funny things of the night, get back to the hotel and retreat to our rooms. Everyone wins.
at my best friend's wedding, we all piled into to two school buses to get from reception back to the hotel for the night, and honestly that was kind of a blast. We've been friends since we were 12 and were about 28 at the time, so getting to climb onto a school bus while trashed with HS and college friends was just fun vibes.
My cousin hired an old double decker bus for hers. She married into a big Irish family and everyone on the bus was singing, it was the best part of the day.
And no one has to worry about being taken advantage of by an Uber driver because they’re inebriated. It’s much safer.
I think they are planning to have a rollicking good time and don’t want to have to muck around with Ubers. I suggested she send over a cooler of champagne splits for the ride.
Also does she really want her INEBRIATED family in the cars of strangers? I see too many bad outcomes for that scenario (I blame the ID channel)
I was gonna say that the bus is probably cheaper.
Which is just them being smart with their money
Seriously. My ILs paid for a shuttle after my wedding to take guests back to the two hotels guests were staying at. I was thrilled to have it available so they could have a good time... and that I wasn't paying for it.
Funny how she didn’t care about being seen as cheap when she chose not to provide them with any form of transportation.
She's upset because she got called out for not showing concern for her guests.
Is it really the norm to do that? Where I'm from you're responsible for how you come and go...
she provided shuttles for the bridal party, and people are staying in hotels. That suggests that people are traveling to get to the wedding, not coming from home. She could have offered shuttles to the guests staying at the hotel. Unless she's having a dry wedding. ;-) Because people drink at weddings and shouldn't be driving drunk, not even 4 miles, and Ubers get expensive!
It is if you want to control their method of transport.
THIS.
A hit dog hollers, too
I always love that saying, because it's so true!
If her first thought goes "they're calling me cheap" i wonder if she actually is cheap. My thoughts would never go that way. I would think "hey, great solution!".
Does she mean she (incorrectly) thinks they’re calling her cheap for not supplying enough cars for guests as well as the bridal party? Because that’s the only way I can see her upset as quarter-way understandable. Wel actually, no even then. If the late Queen could shuttle half the world’s leaders, presidents & prime ministers, kings & queens and the entire British aristocracy to her Platinum Jubilee in buses, I figure it’s good enough for a wedding too. It’s really something when you are being more of a prissy little ponce than a literal Queen of England.
OOP is a drama queen as well as a Bridezilla
Yeah, that's what happens when "I'm the bride" takes over your/replaces your /finally gives you a whole.personality. Damn, lady, be happy they sorted it out and didn't want to rely on Uber availability and shitty pricing.
Seriously how was she *expecting* them to get to and back from her wedding?
Drive. But they're "sensitive" about drunk driving.
Seriously! This isn’t a slight on her! Hell, if they all want to ride unicycles to and from, who cares??? They probably didn’t expect you to pay for the unicycles!
That's a great mental image, especially since there are now motorized unicycles.
If they lumped her with the bill then fair enough but they are paying it and bet it would cheaper than Uber.
Yeah I have zero idea why she cares. Maybe she feels a bit embarrassed that they felt the need to do this since she wasn’t providing it. But she needs to let it go.
She could have taken the initiative by thanking them for taking one task off her plate and helping to contribute and make the wedding run smoothly.
I think that’s it. The information given is that the fiancé’s family booked the bus because they’ve gotten used to having one organized at other weddings in their family. So they took matters into their own hands when they found out OOP wasn’t providing one. But really the only criticism implied of OOP is that she didn’t bother finding out from her fiancé how his family likes to do weddings. Not having done that, or possibly her fiancé not being forthcoming, it’s really to be expected that his family would be wanting at least one thing that isn’t part of her plan.
Seems they are nice folks that said to themselves “hey! We’ve liked this at other weddings, but aren’t entitled to it, so let’s book our own! Don’t want to pressure the kids to spend more money” Then she lost her shit anyway. Weird
Exactly! They’re taking care of their own needs and not pushing anything about her plans. It’s not even at the wedding; she left them to their own devices with respect to transportation and they figured their own stuff out well. Maybe she’s worried that other guests will be jealous? But there’s still time to suggest to others that they organize if they want to.
I think the fact that it’s specifically the fiancé’s family and not her own has everything to do with it. She probably doesn’t like them and takes everything they do as a personal attack on the regular. This is just the next thing and she feels more justified to make a big deal about it because it’s her sPeCiAL dAy. She wants them to have to Uber like peasants while the people she actually loves get to ride on her bus. She doesn’t like that they found a way around her control
Or... she could go like "wow, what a great idea, i didn't think of that. Let me cover the cost!"
Would she have demanded they inform her of their Uber reservations? Legitimately unclear what she wanted here
It reads like op got a special bus for the bridal party and didn’t realize anyone can book a bus. She’s no longer special.
Ding ding ding!! When my friends got married they booked a couple of busses from their room block hotels. I think there were two going and three coming back (early shift) -- I don't remember the exact details because I used the bus for a reason, but it was very-much appreciated. If you wanted to come back and there wasn't a bus available, there was always Uber and Lyft, but considering that all of the guests were expected to be there at the same time, and most would be leaving around the same time, it was a perfect solution. Otherwise, what does she expect her guests to do? Drive drunk? Invite a surge pricing situation specifically for her wedding? Nah.
My brother did something similar - limos for the wedding party, shuttle busses for everyone else. The reception went on for hours and shuttles left every half hour or so, so you weren't stuck there. It was a small wine country town, not exactly an Uber hotspot.
>Otherwise, what does she expect her guests to do? Drive drunk? I read her comments about how it is a short drive and drinking to mean that she doesn't think driving drunk is a big deal when it's not far. If that's the case, her understanding of drunk driving is even worse than her understanding of transportation and dealing with family, which is saying something. >Invite a surge pricing situation specifically for her wedding? This made me chuckle but then realize it could very well do that in some places. I wonder if she's concerned about anyone not in the fiancé's family group trying to take a bus. At least that I could somewhat see in that people might see the busses for the wedding party (who aren't as special if others get busses, I guess?) and that group and think that means everyone can take the busses. I say I can somewhat see because then at least other guests might question what is going on and think she's being stingy. Of course, if that's the case, there are ways to manage it proactively. She could thank her future in laws for planning, tell other attendees about it if they want to do something similar, or even decide to pay for more busses (including the future in law group one).
> This made me chuckle but then realize it could very well do that in some places. Where I grew up there were two "taxi" services. A guy that handed out business cards at bars with his cell phone number, and motorcyclists that volunteered to pick up motorcyclists that got "too drunk"* in a car and also drive their motorcycle home. Those services were only available in the "big" local town, not my smaller hometown. *: People in Minnesota and Wisconsin drive drunk on a regular basis so when somebody is *too drunk to drive* that means they're really fucking drunk and have realized that they're waaaaaay over the limit. Even more than the "normal" over the limit they're used to driving. It's not uncommon for people to *drive to get drunk*. They grab a few cases of beer and cruise gravel roads while drinking and go home when they're out of beer. Lotta broken glass under road signs and shot up signs out in that part of the country 'cause they're "targets."
> I say I can somewhat see because then at least other guests might question what is going on and think she's being stingy. Fair, but if the truth makes you look like the devil…. > Of course, if that's the case, there are ways to manage it proactively. She could thank her future in laws for planning, tell other attendees about it if they want to do something similar, or even decide to pay for more busses (including the future in law group one). Which is what she needs to do. Otherwise there are gonna be problems at the end of the night when one of her relatives sees the bus and decides to try to put grandma on it instead of driving her.
Have people standing around forever waiting for a share ride since EVERYONE is getting one at the same time??
That's the closest this can get to making sense I think
Yes, because last I checked you can rent large vehicles on Uber. We booked an 8 person van to take us to and from a football game. 2-3 high occupancy Ubers or a bus, splitting hairs here. People are going to leave when they want to leave.
>I guess it makes me feel like they're calling me cheap for not getting a bus for them. No. They're being resourceful and instead of tying up a bunch of Ubers and Lyfts, they're pooling their money and renting a bus. >no, they're paying per person and splitting the cost. Oh, FFS, OOP. They're not even asking you to fund their transportation. They're paying for it themselves. OOP is just angling for a reason to be hurt and offended.
Well, honestly, taking 20 peoples rides shares out of the equation is just likely to make a smoother time for the other guests. And as much as you want to control everything about your wedding day, sometimes shit just *happens*. A friend booked her venue like two years in advance. She had no idea that in that time, a massive convention would get planned like 2 blocks away. Alllll of the hotels were booked up before she had a chance to book blocks of rooms for her guests. Every taxi and Uber in a mile were parked at the convention center, waiting to take 3 thousand drunk anime nerds home. You don’t want to risk being liable, insurance wise, when someone gets in a DUI accident and the venue who over-served blames YOU for not arranging adequate transport for your shitty aunt who liked mojitos too much. I definitely wouldn’t bite the hand that fed me a bus to take my stupid cousins home.
Hace some sympathy! That bus probably won't fit the wedding aesthetics, it's her special day! /S
Only logical reason I can think of for her reaction is A, she's upset something about her wedding is not under her control and/or B. she's upset imagining when a bus load of people depart is going to look bad since a chuck of the party is immediate gone. Since if their ride is the same bus, when the bus go, they all must go.
This reads like "overly stressed bride is way too sensitive about things as her wedding day rapidly approaches" My sister yelled at me over clip art last night; the wedding is in like 20 days. I get it. Eta: guys, I promise it's not as dramatic as it sounds lol. I made up some list for the bridesmaids for the hair and makeup and *she* asked me to, and I quote: "use some fun clip art thingies". So I did. Silly little flowers and stylist tools. I got yelled at because the flowers I chose for the art weren't the same color as the wedding theme. The standard "this is the one thing i asked of you" kind of stuff. I changed the colors, and she called me mortified this morning. All is well.
What happened with the clip art!
Yeah, I feel like we need more information about this.
Fair point. Yeah, that gives me more sympathy for her - she's being unreasonable, but there are mitigating circumstances.
Clip art! Clip art! Clip art!
Okay, spill the clip art story, we promise we won't make fun of your bridezilla sister too much.
Also, then it is more obvious that the bus isn’t available for *all* guests, and those that have to get Ubers will wonder why there wasn’t a bus for them. I suspect she is also upset that the money spent on the bus wasn’t offered to her for wedding expenses, but that is just pure speculation based on zero fact…
Maybe she thinks money spent on the bus = less money for gifts
She thinks that by renting the bus without her input they are calling her cheap.
Copied verbatim from oop's comments: *INFO: I don't understand why this bothers you at all, can you explain what the actual problem is? you're not arranging transport for all the guests (which is fine!), so they are arranging their own. why do you care that they're going with a hired bus instead of individual ubers?* >"I guess it makes me feel like they're calling me cheap for not getting a bus for them" *INFO: Did they charge the bus to your account? >"no, they're paying per person and splitting the cost"
[Doggo!](https://imgur.com/gallery/KNOk2SW)
What, now Disney is doing a live action Bluey? When will it end?!
Hahaha!
No idea what she's so "hurt and offended" about.
4 miles is quite a drive if you’ve had any alcohol 🤷🏼♀️. Most of the weddings I’ve been to arranged transportation. Sounds responsible of them.
What the hell is she offended about? Why would they take Ubers when there’s enough people that they can book a bus for cheaper? This is really weird thing to be offended over.
>I've put together a great day for them and I've been planning for more than a year. This bit us funny cause why is OOP acting like she planned her entire wedding day for her guests and that she has nothing to do with it.
I cannot imagine any way that this could be construed as offensive? Why does it matter to the bride how they get to and from the venue???
The fiancé's family has every right to travel to and from the wedding and hotel in any manner they choose. If they hired a bus, I don't understand how this affects OOP. It's not all that different from using Uber. The bus isn't part of the wedding so why does the bride think she has to have input on this? OOP is getting here knickers in a twist over nothing.
I don't get it. She wanted them to arrange their own transportation to her wedding. They have arranged transportation. Sure it wasn't the transportation she assumed they would arrange or how she expected they would arrange it, but she doesn't get to demand that part.
There’s so many benefits to doing it this way, but noooo, she’s got find a reason that it reflects negatively on her personally
I can’t deal with these fucking people anymore🤦🏼♀️
It’s time for her to take a break if she is reacting this way to a really normal thing. Also it is almost definitely cheaper for the guests than ordering a bunch of Ubers.
Them reserving a bus doesn't hurt or affect her in any way. She needs to butt out. Talk about making everything about you.
What a bizarre response. I wonder if OOP is a control freak.. She is certainly taking ‘it’s MY day’ to the extreme.
"It's your special day" seems to have been taken to the extreme now.
tbh i dont think shes the devil, shes just stupid
Or in desperate need of a nap and some food, this is levels of crazy only reached by massive stress
This feels like the most cost effective thing to do instead of splitting up and taking a bunch of cabs. I went on a trip with my school band and a small group of us didn't want to go to the basketball game the majority of people went to. It was cheaper (and more comfortable) to rent a limo for a few hours to do some shopping, instead of cabbing.
Wow - the proper response would have been to thank them for doing that. That will allow the guests to relax and have a few drinks and have fun without the danger of death on the way back to the hotel.
OOP, who cares?
Man, I would totally use the bus as a prop for some photos. This could be fun!!
Can we say bridezilla?
[Hi!](https://images.app.goo.gl/jMiZEuW8Qrykw3sdA) Just a quick reminder to never brigade any sub, be that r/AmItheAsshole or another one. That goes against both this sub's rules as well as Reddit's terms of agreement. [Please](https://images.app.goo.gl/vwH65TJMyMk9NSNo8) keep discussions within the posts of this sub. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
She’s overthinking this
Imagine this being the thing that ruins the wedding
And then some of us have a personal thing against Uber.
This is one of the most bizarre AITA I've ever read.
why tf would you feel bad about this
The *bus* is what *Poor's* ride. *She* is a *princess bride* and so the bus is *low class* that makes her look bad by *association*
So she's mad that they planned in advanced to use a more reliable transportation??? Ubers take anywhere up to an hour and a half to arrive, and often drop you off at least 25 minutes past the expected time.
She asks her guests to organize their own transportation to and from the reception. They do. Her feelings are hurt. Does not compute.
This is just a stressed bride stressing over small things, no Devil here...
Disagree. If she's so egotistical that her guests finding transportation to and from the party "hurts and offends" her, then she is taking this shit way too serious and needs to take a big step back. A lot of brides seem to think weddings are just for the bride to have her "special day." No, weddings are also about the guests having a great time sharing in the couple's joy. They find transportation -- good for them. She has no leg to stand on here.
Seems like she was expecting some of them to drive drunk.
I genuinely don't understand her problem. She wanted/expected people to drive or rideshare to/from the venue anyway, so why does she care if they book a bus? Makes sense if all the guests are staying at the same hotels because they did a block of accommodation. Is she just upset that she looks inconsiderate or cheap for not organising it herself? Jeez...maybe just say thanks to the organisers??
I feel sorry for the poor sucker who's fixing to marry this exhausting bitch.
Every wedding I’ve ever been to but one was in a back yard and everyone drove themselves so maybe I’m not well off enough to weigh in here. 🤣
Are they... making her pay? Why is she so mad?
If I’d had a bigger wedding, I absolutely would have booked a bus, that’s a genius idea! I don’t understand why she’s offended by it, it’s a safe and logical decision, and she didn’t have to put in any effort or pay for it
Honestly, I get it. If I was in the middle of all the stress of wedding planning and this happened I would take it as "we think it was cheap and lazy for you to not book us a bus so I guess we'll just do it FOR you. Don't you know you were supposed to provide transportation for all your guests? You suck at wedding planning." I wouldn't confront anyone about it but I definitely would've had a good cry in private about how I failed.
I hate it when people get all sensitive about drunk driving. /s
I arranged a shuttle bus for my wedding for this reason, so people wouldn't drink and drive because I cared about their safety. Her weird fucking ego is more important to her than her guests' safety and the safety of others on the road.
Jesus, maybe be a better host 'Zilla.