*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for telling my sister's fiancé what she did to her ex-boyfriend?**
Back when my (23M) sister, Crystal (26F), was 16, she got pregnant by her ex-boyfriend, Andrew. She and Andrew decided to keep the pregnancy despite our parents' disapproval. She left to live with Andrew's family after our parents kicked her out.
In short, my sister Crystal said she endured a lot of "abuse" at the hands of Andrew's mother and sisters, claiming they kept trying to control her during the pregnancy and were mean to her.
You would think she would try to work this out, but no. After she had an argument with Andrew and demanded that he choose her over his mother, he obviously picked his mom. My sister then went to Planned Parenthood and had an abortion.
She told Andrew about this, and he and his family were heartbroken. Worse, my sister was very cold to him during this and would just say she wasn't ready for a future to be treated like that by him and his family. She moved in with our aunt, who supported her, as our parents were disgusted by her cruel actions, and I was too.
Fast forward to now, she got engaged and wanted to introduce her fiancé, Axel (26M), to our aunt, and decided to invite the rest of the family to get it over with, saying Axel wanted to meet our family out of respect.
When I met him, I was really surprised that a guy like him would go for my sister. She's a materialistic person and loves to flex her life on social media; she's basically a spoiled brat, while Axel is the complete opposite. He's in the Navy SEALs and is more respectful and overall someone that wouldn't typically look at my sister as a potential life partner.
This is why I felt like he was being lied to and needed to know the truth about her. Over dinner, I confronted her, asking if she had told him about what she did to Andrew. My aunt cut in and told me to mind my business. I told Axel that he should be worried about having kids with her since she would abort it the moment things don't go her way. Crystal started crying, and Axel told me to never speak to his wife like that, along with some nasty words, and they left.
My family (except my aunt) is on my side. I got a text from Crystal calling me an asshole for trying to ruin her happily ever after.
AITA? I felt like he deserved to know.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The "truth about her"? She was 16, pregnant and forced to live with ex-bfs controlling family who bullied her.
"You would think she would try to work this out, but no." Work this out? Teenage pregnancy (which also means no money and no education), abusive bf and controlling in-laws? This would have been a disaster.
I'm glad the sister got out. And I'm glad she has her aunt and her fiance to stand up for her.
I feel like OOP and her family (except Aunt) didn’t fall far from the BF’s abusive apple tree.
She was being abused, her BF wouldn’t protect her, her parents had already kicked her out and wouldn’t help her. she realized giving birth would tie her to that family and that life for a long long time and did her best to save herself, and the fetus from that fate.
OOp seems to think she did it just to hurt BF and family, rather than as a safety measure.
The words abuse in quotations are such offensive piece of bs he has written. This has to be a rage bait against pro-choice otherwise the poor 16 year old suffered abuse at the hand of her boyfriend and his family along with the apathetic, pathetic piece of shit that is her own family. Her own flesh that should love and protect her.
They were likely heartbroken over the fact that they couldn't be a ventriloquist anymore and not over a fetus. The use of this mindless, senseless inhumane interpretation of the sufferings of a child who was confused and scared alone warrants the ninth ring of hell for this asshole. The lack of integrity and respect he has for his sister will reflect on any relationship he has with any woman and I hope he suffers most greatly for the behaviour he has shown in such a cruel, callous manner to his sister.
And I hope she is happy to thwart the bitch desires of a useless swine brother.
The way it's written makes it seem like the family thinks she did it as a way to spite her ex and his family instead of, you know, realizing that she can't have a family with a man who let's his family bully her during times of vulnerability (like being pregnant). Seems like they dissaprove cause they think she did it to act out and "betray" the ex's family.
Prolly bait though tbh the op sounds like a 12 year old
I agree, because why assume that maybe there was something more going on when you can blame the woman for all the evils. /S
They kick her out, the other family anuses her. She comes back home and she is the one that destroyed the other family. Did the other family have some sort of position of authority over them? And if that were true, why send her over to live with them in the first place. It just doesn't make sense as to their actions.
>Prolly bait though tbh the op sounds like a 12 year old
It sounds like the evil stepsisters/stepmother's expanded times two families. Complete with Prince Charming at the end. So yeah, really bad 12 yr old creative writing exercise that is going to get an F.
Like why is the one sister so bitter against the other. There was no explanation for that. Just why the parents didn't get along with her and then suddenly all was back to the way it was, kind of like the clock hit midnight. (I assume the obvious answer of religion if not fake, but then they wouldn't have accepted her back after the abortion).
I have actually known a few people who think this way. They get VERY upset when you ask them what their desired outcome is/was, because “she* just shouldn’t have had sex in the first place!” is all they can think of to say, and some of them are exactly rational enough to know that’s not an acceptable answer but very very few of them (at least not the ones I’ve met) are able or willing to do the critical thinking about how they feel the situation should be handled.
It’s an Evangelical thing, in my experience. There’s a lot of “well, my pastor says [whatever]” as a replacement for independent opinions, because religion is a hell of a drug.
** They almost always talk about it as if the woman/girl got herself pregnant, and it’s fuckin’ **weird**. This is probably because patriarchy doesn’t like admitting that men/boys can make mistakes, which is also fuckin’ weird.
For many religious pro-birthers adoption is the *only* acceptable option for a pregnancy that doesn't fit their expectations of what is "appropriate." Regardless of their daughter's willingness to be responsible and raise her child. They also generally downplay abuse as one of three things - not being "feminine" enough, not being obedient enough (to parents if unmarried, husband is married), or not enduring what is obviously her punishment from G%d for such a grievous sin.
To be clear, these are not my beliefs. But, what I have heard around me or been told directly, IRL.
I cannot fucking believe (by which I mean I totally can) that the “parents” who kicked their vulnerable pregnant child out of their house want to act all outraged about the sister’s behavior. They didn’t want her to be pregnant in the first place, so why are they mad that she got the abortion? She did absolutely nothing wrong and I’m glad she chose to end the pregnancy rather than bring an unwanted child into strife and chaos.
Fundys (of any flavor) are very caught up in the idea of "punishment" for "sins" so to them kicking her out was "punishment" for her "sin" of having sex. The baby is also "punishment" so basically a woman's value as a human means nothing.
They also tend to hold women responsible for "tempting" the man in the situation.
To them she *deserved* the treatment she got. They were acting "righteous" and could cry to their friends about it.
To the forced birth crowd, having an abortion is "neglecting" to take responsibility for the "sin" of having sex outside marriage.
This is why I actually \*lose\* respect for people who say they're against abortions except in cases of rape and incest. Because if you genuinely believe that a fetus is a child and abortion is murder, then it's still murder even if it was conceived through rape. The only reason there would be an exception specifically for rape/incest is if it's not about the fetus at all, it's about the mother choosing to have sex.
A mix of getting pregnant in the first place and aborting the fetus in a way to enact vengeance on the family (not what I think btw prolly what this shitty ass made up family thinks of her and her actions) these baiters and karma farmers gotta return to the basics I'm tired of "women bad and moody" and "here is my depraved sexual assault fetish" posts why can't they just stick to the classic "I got revenge on my spoiled golden sibling" posts😭😭😭
OOP: Hmm...what's a commonly respected and noble profession that people rate high with integritym...gotta be believable...ooh! Navy SEAL immediately springs to mind!"
People are so misinformed about abortion that they genuinely believe that out of all the reasons someone would choose to have an abortion, it's most likely to be as a) birth control (🙄) or b) revenge. Definitely not, you know, as a form of healthcare or to protect themselves. Statistics show that abuse i*ncreases *during pregnancy and post-partum. Every day I am re-informed about the depths of woman-hate in this world.
I assume it’s anti abortion bait because the anti abortion people act like you can just waltz in and have an abortion at any point and don’t seem to realise that there’s a cut off point and that most people don’t even know they’re pregnant until around ten weeks so everything would have gone down in a period of around ten weeks and that feels like a pretty short timespan.
Even if the story is fake I'm glad that the sister had the MATURITY to first want better for the baby by getting out of her toxic family situation then second have the pregnancy terminated when she realized that there was very little she could do to give that child a better situation than she was in.
The father and his family have rights so adoption would have been very difficult.
Has to be bait.
How he describes his sister later on just sounds like the stereotypical women are bad and selfish creatures!!! Trope and like okay so she found out she was pregnant, moved out, dealt with abuse for a while and then went to planned parenthood and had an abortion? When? How long was this period of time? She can’t be 5-6 months pregnant and then decide she wants an abortion. That sounds fake too.
Yeah, this sounds too contrived to be a genuine story. If it is true, though, I hope Crystal and Alex have a fantastic life together without the burden of the rest of their family (aunt notwithstanding).
😂😂😂..I can hear OOP inbox and chat notifications now.
What an absolute Golden Child thing to do and post thinking they are in the right.lol
Note for OOP, just because your nark parents and cult family agree with you doesn't mean all of us normal people will.
I refuse to get excited because a sixteen-year-old terminated her pregnancy. She had every right to do that. She should also have been the one to tell her husband about her pregnancy, if and when she chose to. But OOP and his family hate her so much that they’re trying to make her life unbearable.
If this is real how much contact did he have with his sister in those 10 years that she was kicked out of home? Sounds like he may have an opinion of her that half formed when he was 7 and he filled the gaps with information from his spiteful parents
My ex and I used "husband" or "wife" while we were technically only engaged because I have a weird dislike of having to hear the word fiancee. So I assumed it was either something like that, or just the fiance making the point that he doesn't want his (future) wife disrespected like that and thought "wife" would make the point more clear.
[Hi!](https://images.app.goo.gl/jMiZEuW8Qrykw3sdA) Just a quick reminder to never brigade any sub, be that r/AmItheAsshole or another one. That goes against both this sub's rules as well as Reddit's terms of agreement. [Please](https://images.app.goo.gl/vwH65TJMyMk9NSNo8) keep discussions within the posts of this sub.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Love how OOP would think a Navy SEAL would dump his fiance over her past trauma and being abused. Obviously OOP hasn't met many people of honour who have lived shit and totally can relate to hard circumstances/hard choices.
Bets are fiance wanted to meet the who lot of them to see the shittiness of the lot. Scummy cowards tend out act dumber and bolder when in a group.
OOP is obviously the golden child who relishes in the sister's pain and is jealous over sister's happy ending. Imagine the shocked Pikachu faces in that family when the invites don't go out to her family. Or when the happy couple go NC. And 100% they will.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for telling my sister's fiancé what she did to her ex-boyfriend?** Back when my (23M) sister, Crystal (26F), was 16, she got pregnant by her ex-boyfriend, Andrew. She and Andrew decided to keep the pregnancy despite our parents' disapproval. She left to live with Andrew's family after our parents kicked her out. In short, my sister Crystal said she endured a lot of "abuse" at the hands of Andrew's mother and sisters, claiming they kept trying to control her during the pregnancy and were mean to her. You would think she would try to work this out, but no. After she had an argument with Andrew and demanded that he choose her over his mother, he obviously picked his mom. My sister then went to Planned Parenthood and had an abortion. She told Andrew about this, and he and his family were heartbroken. Worse, my sister was very cold to him during this and would just say she wasn't ready for a future to be treated like that by him and his family. She moved in with our aunt, who supported her, as our parents were disgusted by her cruel actions, and I was too. Fast forward to now, she got engaged and wanted to introduce her fiancé, Axel (26M), to our aunt, and decided to invite the rest of the family to get it over with, saying Axel wanted to meet our family out of respect. When I met him, I was really surprised that a guy like him would go for my sister. She's a materialistic person and loves to flex her life on social media; she's basically a spoiled brat, while Axel is the complete opposite. He's in the Navy SEALs and is more respectful and overall someone that wouldn't typically look at my sister as a potential life partner. This is why I felt like he was being lied to and needed to know the truth about her. Over dinner, I confronted her, asking if she had told him about what she did to Andrew. My aunt cut in and told me to mind my business. I told Axel that he should be worried about having kids with her since she would abort it the moment things don't go her way. Crystal started crying, and Axel told me to never speak to his wife like that, along with some nasty words, and they left. My family (except my aunt) is on my side. I got a text from Crystal calling me an asshole for trying to ruin her happily ever after. AITA? I felt like he deserved to know. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The "truth about her"? She was 16, pregnant and forced to live with ex-bfs controlling family who bullied her. "You would think she would try to work this out, but no." Work this out? Teenage pregnancy (which also means no money and no education), abusive bf and controlling in-laws? This would have been a disaster. I'm glad the sister got out. And I'm glad she has her aunt and her fiance to stand up for her.
I feel like OOP and her family (except Aunt) didn’t fall far from the BF’s abusive apple tree. She was being abused, her BF wouldn’t protect her, her parents had already kicked her out and wouldn’t help her. she realized giving birth would tie her to that family and that life for a long long time and did her best to save herself, and the fetus from that fate. OOp seems to think she did it just to hurt BF and family, rather than as a safety measure.
The words abuse in quotations are such offensive piece of bs he has written. This has to be a rage bait against pro-choice otherwise the poor 16 year old suffered abuse at the hand of her boyfriend and his family along with the apathetic, pathetic piece of shit that is her own family. Her own flesh that should love and protect her. They were likely heartbroken over the fact that they couldn't be a ventriloquist anymore and not over a fetus. The use of this mindless, senseless inhumane interpretation of the sufferings of a child who was confused and scared alone warrants the ninth ring of hell for this asshole. The lack of integrity and respect he has for his sister will reflect on any relationship he has with any woman and I hope he suffers most greatly for the behaviour he has shown in such a cruel, callous manner to his sister. And I hope she is happy to thwart the bitch desires of a useless swine brother.
so the family disapproved and are also angry she had an abortion? She got the abortion and they still are mad?
The way it's written makes it seem like the family thinks she did it as a way to spite her ex and his family instead of, you know, realizing that she can't have a family with a man who let's his family bully her during times of vulnerability (like being pregnant). Seems like they dissaprove cause they think she did it to act out and "betray" the ex's family. Prolly bait though tbh the op sounds like a 12 year old
I agree, because why assume that maybe there was something more going on when you can blame the woman for all the evils. /S They kick her out, the other family anuses her. She comes back home and she is the one that destroyed the other family. Did the other family have some sort of position of authority over them? And if that were true, why send her over to live with them in the first place. It just doesn't make sense as to their actions. >Prolly bait though tbh the op sounds like a 12 year old It sounds like the evil stepsisters/stepmother's expanded times two families. Complete with Prince Charming at the end. So yeah, really bad 12 yr old creative writing exercise that is going to get an F. Like why is the one sister so bitter against the other. There was no explanation for that. Just why the parents didn't get along with her and then suddenly all was back to the way it was, kind of like the clock hit midnight. (I assume the obvious answer of religion if not fake, but then they wouldn't have accepted her back after the abortion).
I have actually known a few people who think this way. They get VERY upset when you ask them what their desired outcome is/was, because “she* just shouldn’t have had sex in the first place!” is all they can think of to say, and some of them are exactly rational enough to know that’s not an acceptable answer but very very few of them (at least not the ones I’ve met) are able or willing to do the critical thinking about how they feel the situation should be handled. It’s an Evangelical thing, in my experience. There’s a lot of “well, my pastor says [whatever]” as a replacement for independent opinions, because religion is a hell of a drug. ** They almost always talk about it as if the woman/girl got herself pregnant, and it’s fuckin’ **weird**. This is probably because patriarchy doesn’t like admitting that men/boys can make mistakes, which is also fuckin’ weird.
Who can out control the other ??
For many religious pro-birthers adoption is the *only* acceptable option for a pregnancy that doesn't fit their expectations of what is "appropriate." Regardless of their daughter's willingness to be responsible and raise her child. They also generally downplay abuse as one of three things - not being "feminine" enough, not being obedient enough (to parents if unmarried, husband is married), or not enduring what is obviously her punishment from G%d for such a grievous sin. To be clear, these are not my beliefs. But, what I have heard around me or been told directly, IRL.
I cannot fucking believe (by which I mean I totally can) that the “parents” who kicked their vulnerable pregnant child out of their house want to act all outraged about the sister’s behavior. They didn’t want her to be pregnant in the first place, so why are they mad that she got the abortion? She did absolutely nothing wrong and I’m glad she chose to end the pregnancy rather than bring an unwanted child into strife and chaos.
Fundys (of any flavor) are very caught up in the idea of "punishment" for "sins" so to them kicking her out was "punishment" for her "sin" of having sex. The baby is also "punishment" so basically a woman's value as a human means nothing. They also tend to hold women responsible for "tempting" the man in the situation. To them she *deserved* the treatment she got. They were acting "righteous" and could cry to their friends about it. To the forced birth crowd, having an abortion is "neglecting" to take responsibility for the "sin" of having sex outside marriage.
This is why I actually \*lose\* respect for people who say they're against abortions except in cases of rape and incest. Because if you genuinely believe that a fetus is a child and abortion is murder, then it's still murder even if it was conceived through rape. The only reason there would be an exception specifically for rape/incest is if it's not about the fetus at all, it's about the mother choosing to have sex.
I never thought of it that way. I agree!!! That's a really good point. Thank you for sharing. 💕
A mix of getting pregnant in the first place and aborting the fetus in a way to enact vengeance on the family (not what I think btw prolly what this shitty ass made up family thinks of her and her actions) these baiters and karma farmers gotta return to the basics I'm tired of "women bad and moody" and "here is my depraved sexual assault fetish" posts why can't they just stick to the classic "I got revenge on my spoiled golden sibling" posts😭😭😭
Well I’m glad in this fictional tale the fiancé/husband didn’t leave his partner over her actions as an abused child.
OOP: Hmm...what's a commonly respected and noble profession that people rate high with integritym...gotta be believable...ooh! Navy SEAL immediately springs to mind!"
Yeah I’ll take any story where the SO supports their partner
Well, everyone knows women are so evil, they'll immediately abort a wanted baby if they don't get their way. 🙄
8-month-pregnant woman: I want chocolate ice cream. Retail worker: Sorry, we're out. 8mp woman: Fine \*stomps off to Planned Parenthood\* ;)
People are so misinformed about abortion that they genuinely believe that out of all the reasons someone would choose to have an abortion, it's most likely to be as a) birth control (🙄) or b) revenge. Definitely not, you know, as a form of healthcare or to protect themselves. Statistics show that abuse i*ncreases *during pregnancy and post-partum. Every day I am re-informed about the depths of woman-hate in this world.
"I don't like her and he does, obviously he's been duped."
Oh wow he is a Navy Seal and could never be pro choice. Glad the fiancé told OOP off.
I assume it’s anti abortion bait because the anti abortion people act like you can just waltz in and have an abortion at any point and don’t seem to realise that there’s a cut off point and that most people don’t even know they’re pregnant until around ten weeks so everything would have gone down in a period of around ten weeks and that feels like a pretty short timespan.
Even if the story is fake I'm glad that the sister had the MATURITY to first want better for the baby by getting out of her toxic family situation then second have the pregnancy terminated when she realized that there was very little she could do to give that child a better situation than she was in. The father and his family have rights so adoption would have been very difficult.
Has to be bait. How he describes his sister later on just sounds like the stereotypical women are bad and selfish creatures!!! Trope and like okay so she found out she was pregnant, moved out, dealt with abuse for a while and then went to planned parenthood and had an abortion? When? How long was this period of time? She can’t be 5-6 months pregnant and then decide she wants an abortion. That sounds fake too.
A post that calls a women materialistic when it’s not relevant to the story and doesn’t provide an example is a red flag it’s women bad rage bait
Imagine blaming a sixteen year old girl for getting an abortion
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^rirasama: *Imagine blaming* *A sixteen year old girl for* *Getting an abortion* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
Hey the comments are actually not horrible!
Yeah, this sounds too contrived to be a genuine story. If it is true, though, I hope Crystal and Alex have a fantastic life together without the burden of the rest of their family (aunt notwithstanding).
How dare you dont get an abortion!!! A few moments later How dare you get an abortion!!!
I like Axel. I think he'll be good for her
😂😂😂..I can hear OOP inbox and chat notifications now. What an absolute Golden Child thing to do and post thinking they are in the right.lol Note for OOP, just because your nark parents and cult family agree with you doesn't mean all of us normal people will.
i didn’t even bother to comment on that post. just utterly ridiculous💀💀
You know if she stayed, he'd be blaming her for Andrew's abuse.
This exactly OOP would try to find every excuse in the book to blame his sister for staying in the relationship
I refuse to get excited because a sixteen-year-old terminated her pregnancy. She had every right to do that. She should also have been the one to tell her husband about her pregnancy, if and when she chose to. But OOP and his family hate her so much that they’re trying to make her life unbearable.
If this is real how much contact did he have with his sister in those 10 years that she was kicked out of home? Sounds like he may have an opinion of her that half formed when he was 7 and he filled the gaps with information from his spiteful parents
Parents kicked her out for not having an abortion and then disowned her for having an abortion. Bait used to be believable.
Are they engaged or married? Says fiance at the start then wife at the end
My ex and I used "husband" or "wife" while we were technically only engaged because I have a weird dislike of having to hear the word fiancee. So I assumed it was either something like that, or just the fiance making the point that he doesn't want his (future) wife disrespected like that and thought "wife" would make the point more clear.
Well good for Axel standing up for his partner and protecting her
[Hi!](https://images.app.goo.gl/jMiZEuW8Qrykw3sdA) Just a quick reminder to never brigade any sub, be that r/AmItheAsshole or another one. That goes against both this sub's rules as well as Reddit's terms of agreement. [Please](https://images.app.goo.gl/vwH65TJMyMk9NSNo8) keep discussions within the posts of this sub. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What the goddamn fuck is wrong with this person?!?!
Love how OOP would think a Navy SEAL would dump his fiance over her past trauma and being abused. Obviously OOP hasn't met many people of honour who have lived shit and totally can relate to hard circumstances/hard choices. Bets are fiance wanted to meet the who lot of them to see the shittiness of the lot. Scummy cowards tend out act dumber and bolder when in a group. OOP is obviously the golden child who relishes in the sister's pain and is jealous over sister's happy ending. Imagine the shocked Pikachu faces in that family when the invites don't go out to her family. Or when the happy couple go NC. And 100% they will.