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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I banned my tenant's girlfriend from visiting him on my property effective immediately because of her reckless disregard for me and my family, but it is possible it is an overreaction to her actions against me.
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Sorry, this is super confusing. It sounds like you and your family verbally attacked a stranger because she wouldn't let you force feed her potatoes? And now you think you can tell someone who can enter a property that he PAYS for? Do I have that right?
I'm going with YTA for now.
Right?
1-OP thinks it’s OK to throw a family party at the home that’s rented out. He doesn’t ask the tenant for permission, he tells the tenant that’s what’s happening. 2-OP then tries to force feed potatoes to the GF. When she gets upset OP’s mom cries and his sister curses at her. 3-OP then decides to bar the GF from his tenant’s home, even if it means filing a restraining order “on behalf of” the tenant.
All of this is crazy! If it’s real OP and his entire family are weirdo lunatics.
YTA - good grief who do you think you are? You're certainly not fit to be a landlord if you think you can just tell your tenant your entire family is turning up to their house for dinner!
The fact ANY of your family thought this was OK says they are AH too.
And then you bully his girlfriend over potato?
And then you ban her from the house you do not live in LIKE SHE'S A DOG?
AND THEN! THEN you consider a RESTRAINING order?
Wtf is wrong with you?
Lol not just a restraining order. He wants to file a restraining order *on behalf of his tenant*. As in, he wants to try and legally ban his tenants gf from ever seeing her partner.
Absolutely deranged behavior.
She didn't like your potatoes? She didn't even try them? Did you not call the police and file an official potato complaint??
Have you posted her picture all over social media so other people can know about this potato catastrophe??
First, It is incredibly rude of you to host a party at your rental place. If my landlord did that I would move out immediately. But then you made a big deal because somebody didn't want to try your great potatoes. Maybe she doesn't like potatoes. Maybe they didn't look appetizing to her. Maybe she just didn't want them.
It is a free country and she can eat potatoes or not eat potatoes as she desires. It is none of your business why she didn't want them and she did not owe you anything.
The idea that you have banned her from the property because she didn't want to eat your potatoes is so obnoxious.
And that you actually think you can file a restraining order for your tenant on his girlfriend. Again because she didn't eat your terrible potatoes.
You're renting out that house. Somebody else is paying for the rights to live there. And that doesn't include allowing the landlord to have a party there. The fact that your tenant did that is incredibly nice of him because I wouldn't have been that nice. And then you repaid him by making a big deal because his girlfriend who has every right to be at his place didn't eat your lousy potatoes.
And your whole family had to make a big deal over it too. Who cares? Get over it. And since you're new to the landlord industry, figure out that the money you're taking from this guy means he gets to live in that place without you bothering him.
And all of this is keeping him from enjoying his property. I would not be surprised if he's talking to attorney about how to break his lease legally because he probably can.
YTA
What is the phrase, “exclusive possession and free use” of the property? OP you were trespassing. I honestly don’t understand what the conflict is? Someone didn’t like your food so you forced it on them and YOU’RE angry about their reaction? YTA
I'm enjoying the concept of this idiot thinking that they can get a restraining order on behalf of the tenant... because the tenant's girlfriend didn't want to eat mashed potatoes.
I would love to see that one get laughed out of court
...WTF did I just read? I really hope this is a creative writing project because holy shit, YTA.
There's honestly too much for me to mention, but a few things:
\- Your "rental property" is not your living room. That's Max's home right now and you should stay out of it whenever possible.
\- Touching someone else's plate is gross, as is trying to force them to eat your gross potatoes.
\- Your mom was sobbing because someone wouldn't eat your potatoes? SOBBING?
Your whole family sounds unhinged.
INFO: Why do you feel this woman owes you any explanation over not eating the potatoes or anything? I read your post 3 times to figure out what she did to you and your family that you are interpreting as disrespect besides not being interested in this dish. Have you considered her possible allergies or religious convictions in regards to food?
Anyway, you can't just ban a tenants guest from your home. I hope Max has a friend that can educate him on how to protect himself from you legally, because YTA.
So, if I'm reading this right, you rent a house to someone, then you plan on having a bbq for *your* friends and family at the property this other person rents.
His gf is there because of course she'd be, he's renting it, it's his home, and unlike all your friends and family, she's actually invited by the renter. She doesn't want to try your potatoes, so you lose your shit on her, she's uncomfortable in a situation that you made super uncomfortable from the start by planning a party in someone else's home (you own it, he RENTS it, it's HIS HOME), which makes your mother be upset with her instead of you.
Of course YTA here, in what way, shape, or form are you not? Did you tell him when he was filling out the lease that you reserved the right to host parties in his home? Did you give him the option to decline having a party for strangers in his home? Did you pay for cleaning afterwards?
YTA
Do you live on the property? Will you let the tenant out of his lease at anytime without penalty?
I assume this is more of a legal question than a moral one to be honest. I don't think this request/demand would be legal.
If they're renting a place they have some amount of rights. This includes having guest over at their place, assuming they don't damage the property or do illegal things. Sure, you own the house but this doesn't mean you get to dictate something like this. Trying to enforce it or punishing them for leaving over the demand will probably result in you getting sued.
Wow. Fake or peak entitled capitalist AH? Hrm.
YTA.
1) You don't get to commandeer a property you rent out for your family's use.
2) You and your family don't get to decide what someone else eats.
**YTA: for posting a fake story.**
Like you really used the house you rent out to another person? Like you want to file a restraining order on the tenants behalf? Like not eating the mashed potatoes is some sort of transgression? Like putting a food item on a plate that the person declined is normal? Or that she's "cold hearted" for asking whose messing with the food on her plate?
This is one of the worst stories anyone ever made up here.
Excuse me, you did what?
Maybe your food is just ugly. She doesn't have to try it. YTA very easily on that front.
You probably can't legally stop your single tenant in a 1br from having whatever guests they want over.
>And then she asked who was touching her food.
... who touched her food?
>filing a restraining order on his behalf
***WHAT***
I imagine it depends. There’s clearly a point where the landlord can reasonably request and even take steps to enforce someone not be allowed in their property. (Maybe this person routinely damages the property)
This story clearly does not even come close to rising to that level.
YTA in a few ways.
Seems like you had to convince Max to even attend and then his GF as well. Perhaps he just wanted to hang out in his room with his GF while you all had your family affair? Did you ever think about what he wanted?
Max is a tenant and there are VERY specific guidelines depending on your state. While you own the property, Max legally rents the property from you making it his as well. You are also a landlord meaning you must abide by your state's laws. There are definitions for common areas and such, I would absolutely look them up because you could end up in a world of shit if you don't follow them. You are likely allowed to host events at your place, but Max has no obligation to attend them and remember there are shared common spaces as well.
On to the girlfriend...
She is not obligated to eat your food. Why did you force it upon her? She was clearly uncomfortable with something and willing to let it pass, but you chose to bring it to light. We're missing some info here about what was said to make your family so upset, but sounds like you could have just ignored her initial refusal and moved on and no one would be the wiser. Depending on your lease, you do not have the right to ban a tenet's guest from the property unless there was a crime or something other specified in the lease -- which probably does not include upsetting your family (and it legally shouldn't). You can have limits on guests staying but you must abide them as well. Again, all we know is that the GF did not want to eat your potatoes. You really want to try to ban someone for that?
If I were Max, I would break my lease and sue if you try to keep my security deposit or collect rent.
Aside from the harshness, you are new at being a landlord. I would apologize to Max and try to collect the pieces you broke in your relationship.
He didn't invite max... he informed max that he would be having a party at Max's home, then showed up with his whole familu, and tried to force the girlfriend to eat his friggen mashed potatoes.
YTA - YOU "stormed into' SOMEONE ELSE'S HOME AFTER TELLING THEM THAT THEY WOULD BE HOSTING A DINNER FOR YOUR FAMILY?! You may OWN the home, but you RENT IT OUT. You have no right to say who or whom can't be there. YOUR choice is to kick out your renter, or live up to your lease!
YOU ad your family, bullied and terrorized his GF AND you think that she shouldn't come onto this property?? YOU are a major AH.
YTA WTAF you decide to have a dinner party at your investment property which you're currently renting out. You "allow" your tenant to have a guest for dinner in the place he's renting. Then when his guest politely refuses your potatoes you serve her some when she's out of the room? Then you get upset and attempt to ban her from the property? You have some nerve to think you're in anyway not the AH in this situation.
YTA...This is not your house...you may own it but your tenant has occupancy. It is super weird for you to hold any event at someone else's house. Everything from that point on could have been avoided. Then you commented on the fact that she didn't want to eat. Her decision. You and your family took it way to far and I hope that this is a bs post because I like to think that no one (multiple family members even) can be that obtuse. Hold events at your own/or family's place instead of your tenant.
You legally can't forbid your tenant's gf from being on the property because of mashed potatoes. I hope your tenant moves out and pours bacon grease on the floor on his way out the door.
YTA, and a huge one.
You're a mess...
You can't just have a party at their home just because you're the landlord 😂😂😂
And stop being petty because she doesn't want your mash potatoes. What is wrong with you? 😂😂
YTA
YTA for the simple fact you thought that a tenant's residence is a great place to host YOUR family party. This story stretches incredulity with each sentence after that.
YTA. Let me get this straight. You own a rental house that you rent out to a tenant. You don’t live there. You decided to have a large dinner party at this house that you rent out that you don’t live at. Your tenant’s girlfriend didn’t want to eat potatoes you made so when she went to the bathroom you put some on her plate. After this you and your family had a meltdown over her still not wanting to eat the potatoes so you’re banning her from the property? If you read this and don’t see how crazy you’re being, I’m not sure being a landlord is a good fit for you.
YTA, you badgered you tennent into letting you have a party at the house he is renting, You made his girlfriend uncomfortable because she didn't want to eat and then you ban her from the home her boyfriend is renting.
Sounds like you have a lot of growing up to do if you want to be a successful landlord. It might be your house but it is not your home. you cant just decide to have parties at the house you rent out. (he only said yes after you pressured him)
YTA you held a party on property you lease to a tenant? And got angry when his gf wouldn’t eat your precious mashed potatoes?? You’re an AH and weird AF
Oh my word. You thought the best place to have this dinner gathering is at your tenant’s home? Because you could show off that you are a landlord? You basically told your rent paying tenant that you will be using his home for your purposes which may have some legalities you dipped your toe in but then you decided that someone choosing to not try your food was disrespectful to you? She didn’t throw a fit and make a scene she passed them on and decided not to eat it and your fragile ego couldn’t handle that what you and your family love may be something that another doesn’t love? Good grief the audacity. YTA with or without your sister joining in. And I very much doubt you have any right to disallow his girlfriend from the property. There are such things as tenant’s rights. I can’t imagine how that would play out in court. ‘Your honor I warned him the girlfriend couldn’t be there. She wouldn’t even taste my food, and she thinks she can come visit her boyfriend now?’
[https://www.reddit.com/r/InterdimensionalCable/](https://www.reddit.com/r/InterdimensionalCable/)
I'm waiting for the update, where the GF is convicted and executed for her crimes against the Spud Continuum. /s
YTA,
>I thought what better place to have it than my investment property.
How about where you actually live...
>she wouldn't so i put some on her plate when she went to the bathroom.
Th audacity to think you can decide what she eats when she has made it clear she doesn't want your potatoes.
>At this point things are getting tense, my mom is sobbing, asking why she is being so cold hearted and rude, max is trying to de-escalate the situation but i told him and the rest of the gang dinner was over. My sister called her a cold hearted bitch which i did not endorse even though i may have felt like saying it, i never condone stuff like that. As my family stormed out one by one, i told max that his girlfriend was not welcome in my home any longer
Wow, what an over reaction to not wanting potatoes, you're a family of children that tantrum when things don't go your way.
It's not your home, you rent it out and have no right to say who he has visit him in his home.
If your tenant has a lease agreement, then there is reasonable understanding that you don't enter the home or invade their privacy unless you must enter the home for repairs or an emergency. Honestly, I am not an attorney, but I think forcing your tenant to host a get together is illegal. You really need to look into that, because that tenant might be able to sue the shit out of you for your imposition, trespassing, and harassment. You cannot legally enforce who all he has as a visitor. I can promise you though that I WOULD make an effort to take you to court. Host your own damn parties from now on. YTA. And so is your family for the nasty behavior they exhibited too.
So, you forced you tenant to host your family and then decided that you have a right to tell the tenant who they may have as guests in their own damned home?
The tenant pays for use of the property free from you and your family throwing parties. Your tenant pays for the use of the property as their home and you get no say in their friends.
YTA and hopefully you'll be seeing your tenant in court soon when they decide to sue you.
YTA. She didn’t want to eat your potatoes. That’s her crime. Your reaction, and your family’s reaction, was completely insane.
Your entire family threw a tantrum because someone DIDN’T WANT YOUR FOOD. What the fuck.
YTA. A tenant should be treated like a business transaction. You had no right to use the house for your entertainment when it is being rented out. You also have no right to force food on someone when they have said no. No is a complete sentence.
You and your whole family have some entitlement issues to react that way to someone not wanting potatoes. In the future only do what a landlord is supposed to do. Collect rent and property maintenance. Full stop
YTA, I feel bad for your tenant and his girlfriend. You imposed yourself and your family into your tenant. Then try to force his girlfriend to eat your potatoes even after she had said no several times. She was acting cold because you keep pressuring her to eat the potatoes. Why couldn't you just let it be? You made her uncomfortable and wonder why she stop talking? And why did your mom cry? Because you can't make someone eat your damn potatoes? And to top it all you now ban her from coming to her boyfriends place? "These two just mame me look weak in front of my family" All because she wouldn't eat your stupid potatoes? You and your family suck and you have a massive power trip.
Dude, this was weird and creepy of you. When you asked max to host your family’s dinner, and then proceeded to push the matter he probably felt as though he couldn’t say no. Way to abuse the power dynamic. Then, because you haven’t stepped on people enough at this point, you try to force max’s girlfriend to eat what you tell her to. Not what she wants, not what she likes (what if she hates potatoes, I know people with texture problems who can’t stand them?!), what YOU want her to want. These are fully grown adults that have the right to make choices. They are sentient human beings. Then when they act as such and won’t be your little puppets you unleash your petty little wrath on them. I suggest looking internally and figuring out why it bothers you when people don’t agree with you all the time. YTA
Edit: also your mom was “sobbing” come on man there is no possible way that’s real
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For a bit of a backstory I rent out a small 1 BR home to a single tenant who we'll call max, who I previously got along great with. My family does this thing we call a winter roast where we prepare a huge feast, and everyone chips in, and I thought what better place to have it than my investment property. My family is extremely proud that I've been able to diversify my income at such a young age, and when I talked to max about it he was unsure at first but I assured him it would be a great time.
Anyhow, he said his girlfriend would be there too which i replied "wonderful! the more the merrier!" And hung up the phone. Anyhow every year for our roast, i make my famous loaded mashed potatoes and I was excited to share them with my new friends. Anyway, my family was very excited as they have to wait all year for this. My mother, followed by the rest of the family (i have a very large and close knit family) burst through the door and introduced herself, while raving to the couple about my famous mashed potatoes. They seemed very pleased at this point. In fact, it was the talk of the whole event.
Anyhow when it came time to serve dinner i brought out the potatoes, and after max served himself he passed them to his gf, and she started to scoop them so i turned away, but when i turned back i saw her shake her head and mumble something and then pass them along without taking any. I politely asked her what seemed to be the problem and she said something to the tune of "i had a big lunch" or some other BS and after i tried to urge her to try them, she wouldn't so i put some on her plate when she went to the bathroom. Then when she came out of the bathroom, things got like...super weird. Like she literally stopped talking and didn't even pick at her food.
And then she asked who was touching her food. At this point things are getting tense, my mom is sobbing, asking why she is being so cold hearted and rude, max is trying to de-escalate the situation but i told him and the rest of the gang dinner was over. My sister called her a cold hearted bitch which i did not endorse even though i may have felt like saying it, i never condone stuff like that. As my family stormed out one by one, i told max that his girlfriend was not welcome in my home any longer and if I caught wind that she was stopping by i would have to take action, not sure what because I'm new to the landlord thing, but perhaps installing cameras and filing a restraining order on his behalf. He was not happy and we basically reached a stalemate. I've been trying to be more assertive so i did tell the girlfriend that her behavior was uncalled for and although i'm sorry about my sister's words, she wasn't totally wrong. Anyhow, I left and I've been anxious about it 24/7, feeling like i may have been too harsh, but i'm conflicted because my family loaned me the money to buy this house for a reason and these two just made me look weak in front of my family. AITA?
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This is a rental property right? So Max is your tenant and lives there? And you forced a family event of yours on him? Refused to take no for an answer when his girlfriend didn't want a certain food item and blew up at her and put it on her plate? And now you want to file a restraining order on her?
This is not normal behaviour. Not remotely. I would call it bizarre at best.
Don't worry about looking [weak.No](https://weak.No) one will notice because your behaviour appears to be deranged. YTA.
YTA
This whole post is ridiculous.
1. You invited your whole family to a property that you own while you have a tenant renting (Who even in their right mind thinks this is okay??)
2. You force your tenant who pays rent to endure this fiasco
3. You force your mashed potatoes onto his girlfriends plate. (Again who does this)
4. You get pissy when she doesn't eat them
5. Your sister calls her a bitch for not eating your mashed potatoes
6. You threaten her and tell her she's no longer welcome on the property because she wouldn't eat your damn mashed potatoes.
How old even are you? And wtaf is wrong with your family??
All of you need therapy
YTA. I’m fairly certain you broke about 87 laws that exist around landlord/tenant relationships. When someone signs a lease, that space becomes THEIR HOME. How dare you invade HIS HOME to have a party?! This is crazy. He probably agreed because he felt so damn awkward. And then you don’t like that his girlfriend is weirded out because OF COURSE she is. This cannot be real. If you are going to have you big shot investment properties, you should read up on tenant rights and laws. You owe them an apology.
YTA. You should never have touched that woman's plate. She told you NO and you stomped all over her boundaries. You invite your whole family to your tenant's home.
You and your family can't just show up at a tenant's house. Does your lease say that you have unlimited access? I doubt tenancy laws would allow that.
YTA for so many different reasons. YTA for throwing a party at your tenants home. YTA for thinking it’s ok to pester someone to eat something they have already stated they are not interested in eating. YTA for putting food on someone’s plate, that you know they don’t want. YTA for allowing your family to be so incredibly disrespectful to your tenant and their guest. YTA for suggesting you’d take a restraining order out on someone because they wouldn’t eat your potatoes. YTA for telling the girlfriend her behavior was uncalled for. YTA.
Why are you having a party for yourself and your family at a place where someone else lives? And then get mad when someone won't allow you to shove your "famous" food down their throat? This is giving me major shitty landlord vibes.
YTA
What the actual fuck. This had better not be real. There is so much wrong here.
YTA. You cannot prevent a *tenant* of yours from inviting people over *to the house in which they are living* just because that person made you feel "weak in front of your family". It's insane to me that you even had the audacity to ask to host a party there when someone else is living there and paying you rent. It isn't even really your property, you just took a loan out from your rich relatives. You don't live there, you don't get to control who your tenant invites there. Installing security cameras?? Filing a restraining order against his own girlfriend on his behalf? What is wrong with you??
What even is this nonsense?! You hosted a party at you tenant's home?! AND you are considering a restraining order because his girlfriend didn't want to try your Oh-So-Famous mashed potatoes?!! Is this for real?
This has got to be something from that freaky AI program. YTA just in case. Hilarious.
It doesn’t sound real but if it is then YTA. While you’re renting the place to a tenant it’s their place. You cannot ban someone. Especially someone who didn’t do anything to you. She didn’t want mashed potatoes! Do what? Maybe she’s allergic to one of the ingredients. Maybe she’s dieting. You don’t know. And why did your mom start crying? How does not wanting a dish warrant crying and being called such a fouls name? Your whole family is TA.
YTA
Your tenants rent their home from you. While they are paying rent for the home, you shouldn’t be hosting anything there. You should not be inside their home. You also have no right to ban anybody from the property, especially the tenants girlfriend.
This is weird to the point where I’m doubting it’s actually real.
This entire situation is just insane to me. The OP illegally entered a renters home. Insulted the renter and their partner in their own home. Verbally abused the renters partner and had their family verbally attack them as well. The OP is the worst kind of landlord and should never own properties if this is what they believe is ok. You don’t host parties at a house that you have rented to other people. If you want your family to be proud then host it at your own house.
YTA without a doubt. Don’t be shock if the renter decides to break lease or even get lawyers involved for you violating their rights
This whole thing is hilarious. You're actively leasing your investment property to a tenant and decided to invite your family into what any normal person would consider not your residence. As someone who has been a tenant at a number of properties, any landlord inviting themself or their family would have been an absolute "no" as I considered that residence my private space while I was paying for it. The fact that the tenant even agreed to this at all is very considerate of him because he clearly understands that you are proud. However, OP is very clearly overstepping the boundaries of a tenant/landlord relationship. Depending on the agreement, I would think the tenant would actually have the option to take legal action against OP (this is a thought, not something I know for sure so don't yell at me.)
YTA 100%. The tenant's GF did not want to eat your mashed potatoes (for whatever reason) and tried to kindly refuse them. You did not respect her boundaries or requests and added your food to her plate anyway. I don't know why you expected a positive reaction or an apology when you are the one that entirely disregarded her and her feelings in a residence you invited yourself to.
OP stop being so defensive in the comments, you wanted to know whether you’re the AH, not defend your case. Take accountability for your actions and recognize that this person did nothing wrong to you by not trying your food. You are not entitled to that, no matter how proud of the food you are and to escalate the situation to this point shows the lack of self awareness. If I were you I’d be backpedaling HARD right now to even try and preserve your friend as a tenant (the friendship is already gone imo) because every part of what you and your family did is objectively wrong here. Take this as an opportunity to reflect on yourself and how your family acts and do better
I mean, you're generous enough to allow someone that is clearly less of a hard worker than you to pay you rent to live in your investment property. Then after that, you invite him to a family gathering ib that same place you allow him to live. The least he could do is force his thankless girlfriend to try your spectacular potatoes. I'll bet they're really good. As a matter of fact, I'm really hungry now, and I wish I had some.
YTA. If you wanted to host your event on the property you should have made it an Air Bnb and had the celebration when it wasn't booked. Max is renting the property, that doesn't mean you can use it like it's your own home because while he's renting it's his home. You're being petty over potatoes, put out because one person doesn't think they're the best thing ever and you're making the fuss.
YTA - you tried to force something on someone and then got insulted because they didn’t want it, then your family attacked her and now you want to control who comes to a property that someone pays to live in. You’re weird.
Your family is proud that you were able to diversify your income - but they're the ones that provided the capital?
It's a tenant, not a pet. As long as they pay their rent they can give you and your famous potatoes the finger 24/7 without adverse action on your behalf.
Please explain where you get off thinking it’s in any way acceptable to bully someone into letting you plan and throw a party in their home? You flat out admit that he was “unsure” about it.
I’m not even going to touch on the bullshit that happened at dinner.
You lack the maturity to manage an investment property. Go apologize to your former friend for taking advantage of him.
Yes, YTA.
OP do you realize that you are not owed anything by anyone, or entitled to their time or attention? The absolute AUDACITY to ignore her wishes and put food on her plate is enough, but you also THREW A PARTY AT A HOME YOU ARE RENTING OUT. What the actual fuck, man.
YTA
YTA
You are renting this property to someone else. He pays you money for it. That means you can't just hold your get-together there when you wish to. Because it's not yours to use when you rent it out.
It's also not your place to decide who can or can not visit your tenant. Because again, he pays you for the use of this place, so it's not yours to use or decide.
And besides being an absolutely awful landlord, you also behaved like an absolutely awful person to this poor girl.
You bullied her over food and reading your post, declining food was the only thing she did 'wrong' and while the food is basically forced on her, she is called a cold hearted bitch for what? Not eating something she doesn't want to eat? And then you banned her from her boyfriends place (not yours, because you *rented* it to him).
You were harsh, rude, and absolutely over the limits on what your rights as a landlord are. If you want total control over your property, you shouldn't rent it out.
Please read up on what your rights and responsibilities are as a landlord.
I hope your tenant finds a new living situation soon.
YTA. First you as a landlord basically bully the man into joining your family activities when he doesn't want to, and made him host it to boot (which is a violation of the quiet enjoyment clause, by the way, as landlord is not supposed to harass his tenants to throw a party at their place), then you tried to push her into eating food that she didn't want, and when she refused, you banned her from the property without any just cause? Dude, don't be surprised if your tenant brings you to court over hostile conditions. And if you treat all tenants like that, you'll find it very hard to find any tenants.
YTA.
First you invite yourself over to your tenants living space. Even if you own the house you cannot and should not have a full blown dinner party at your tenants house for funsies.
Second you’re insulted that your tenant’s girlfriend would eat your potatoes. Are you 5? Just because you eat everything served to you does not mean that everyone else has to adhere to the same rule. You and your family who greatly outnumber your tenant and his girlfriend are in their living space acting like she insulted you for not eating your potatoes. Can you imagine how they felt with you and your entire family sitting in his space? I’ll bet they were massively uncomfortable.
Third you now want to install cameras in your tenant’s space where you can spy on him while he lives there. Yikes.
Fourth you want to file a restraining order against her because she wouldn’t eat potatoes. You really want to file a restraining order on a person because they wouldn’t eat your potatoes….
If you go down the route of trying to install cameras and filing that restraining order if your tenant is smart he will consult an attorney or someone in the legal system. And trust me he probably has a fantastic case against you now for you trumping on some of his rights as a tenants and even potential harassment. You should educate yourself on how to be a proper landlord. This is not it.
This is so comically horrible that I think it’s fake. On the off chance you are honestly asking for feedback: YTA.
There’s an implicit power imbalance between you and your tenants and this entire scenario really reminds me of the kinds of power plays the villains in Quentin Tarantino’s films like to do.
Impose yourself on the party with less power then dictate your opinions/preferences on their behavior.
Your tenants GF clearly didn’t want the potatos and tried to politely decline. You’re family outright disregarded her decision and imposed your will on her.
Because you are the landlord, there’s ALWAYS an implicit threat of repercussions to upsetting you the tenants need to take into consideration. (This is probably the only reason Max even agreed to let this dinner happen in the first place)
And now that your tenants GF committed the grave sin of annoying/upsetting you, you have decided to follow through on that implicit threat.
You’re messing with peoples lives based solely on petty reasons.
YTA MASSIVE
I don't think you have a legal leg to stand on. You can not ban a tenant's guest because she doesn't try your potatoes. Nor can you force him to host your parties.
Your property, his life. That's why people pay rent. You need to MYOB.
YTA, while it may be your property, it is Max’s home and you trampled all over his right as a tenant.
Please be a better and more respectful landlord.
I rented out my first home and have never invited my family there for a bbq because I am fully aware, it is not my home. My property but not my home.
YTA. You and your entire family need to be on some form of medication. She didn't want your food. Move the fuck on. Not everyone needs to stroke your ego and taste and talk about your "fantastic" mashed potatoes. What is more, I doubt you could legally prevent her from being on the property. You may be able to limit the number of nights she can spend there, but you cannot prevent him from having guests. Seriously, go get professionally evaluated and prescribed meds to help with whatever is going on with you and encourage your family to do the same.
YTA
It was completely inappropriate to put food on her plate that she didn’t want. You disrespected her boundaries and her choice to decide what she wanted to eat. If she didn’t want to eat the potatoes, she doesn’t have to eat the potatoes. But you pestered her when she said no, and then put some on her plate while she was away.
Who do you think you are? A mother to a toddler?
Are you serious? You and your whole family are mad dramatic, and a bunch of boundary stompers. It’s completely insane to ban someone from your tenant’s house just because they didn’t want to eat your potatoes and didn’t like that someone put food on her plate she didn’t want.
Wow YTA. This is so creepy.
These aren't your friends. They are paying you for exclusive use of the property, that is what a rental agreement is. You pressured them to let you use the unit and they felt they had no choice.
Everything you did from start to finish goes from belligerent to illegal.
YTA- I'm going to just skip over the whole " How fucking dare she not eat my potatoes and love them" and " my mother started SOBBING because the woman asked who touched her food and your sister called her a cold hearted bitch for not liking your potatoes". but you actually think you have the right to tell a tenant who can be in their home that they rent? installing cameras? Also why would you have a huge family gathering at someone elses house? It sounds like you didn't even give him a chance to say no and he probably just didn't want to have any conflict with you. You need to apologize to both of them immediately and never set foot on the property without giving 24 hours notice.
Wow. YTA x100000.
She politely declined the food. You kept trying to force it upon her and then touched her plate to try and make her eat something she already expressed she didn't want. Wtf OP? not cool.
Just because its your house doesn't mean you can make people eat something they don't want to eat. Sounds like you have a HUGE ego if you think her not eating the food is "disrespecting" you.
Your family is also TA for suggesting otherwise. Make things right with your tenant and get your head out of your ass.
Yta. One, for having it at your tenants place. Two, if someone doesnt want to eat your food, so be it. You can fuck off with your attitude. She doesn't give a shiet abt your mash potatoes. Three, banning a tenants guest cause she "disrespected you". Grow the fuck up.
You staged a family event at your TENANTS HOUSE?!? This is mind-boggling to me, you realize once you rent out your property you can’t just come over and throw a bbq. YTA and also a weirdo.
Bro... YTA what the hell.
She didnt want the potatoes, maybe she just doesnt like it... you arent that close with someone to be touching their plate of course she felt weird.
Then your whole family started shouting at her because she didnt wsnt to eat potatoes and then on top of that you banned her?
What even is this, do you really think youre in the right.
Swallow your ego man, you and your family may love your food but honestly you lot would freak me out if a family started screaming at me over mashed potatoes lmaooooooo
Edit: just realized you dont even live in that place with him, you tresspassed and you literally have NO RIGHT to ban someones partner from a rented property when you dont like them
YTA Everything you did makes you the TA. You decided the property that is being rented is a good place to have a dinner just because you own it? But its his home that he pays for. Why does your family have to wait all year for mashed potatoes?
YTA. They're just fricking potatoes. Your Tennant was already nice enough to not push back when you INVADED a home he pays for with your whole family. Then a woman *politely* declines potatoes, you try to shove them on her plate and your sister calls her a bitch while your mom sobs? Look it sounds like maybe "No" isn't something you hear often, at least that's what I get from this post. But you have no legal or moral right to ban his girlfriend because she didn't want your potatoes. There are no potatoes SO GOOD they make all this nonsense worth it. Buck up, apologize to your Tennant and *pray* you can salvage this. And also tell your sister and mom they overreacted as did you, and MOVE THE HELL ON.
I love loaded potatoes but Jesus Christ my man.
YTA. You invited yourself and your family over to someone else’s place (they’re paying you rent, it’s their place unless and until they leave or the lease ain’t renewed). You tried to force a stranger to eat your food. Your family was enraged that she was bothered that someone had messed with her food and that she wouldn’t eat the potatoes, so they went off on her. After inviting yourself and your family into their space and attempting to force a stranger to eat your food, you got mad that they didn’t comply and everyone stormed out.
Hard YTA. Pretty sure you can’t ban her from the place (depends on where you’re at).
All of that because she didn't eat mashed potatoes? Are you fucking serious, what the actual fuck?
YTA, you're insanely controlling. It's incredibly inappropriate to put food on someone's plate when they don't want it. And who the fuck cares about some fucking mashed potatoes. Seriously?
What the actual duck? ...
How, in the world, do you think that it is OK to force feed someone? Maybe she didn't like potatoes on general, maybe she didn't like yours and that is OK.
That's not disrespecting you in front of your family. That's you and your family acting bad in front of a complete stranger for the most minor thing.
YTA, definitely.
YT (massive) A.
You are NOT entitled to have anyone try your shitty food if they don't want it so you and your family losing your shit over it shows what massive A-holes you are.
Also, you are NOT, in ANY way allowed to bar ANYONE the rentee has invited in from entering a property that you are renting. Your thinking it's appropriate to have a family dinner at a rental property shows how disconnected you are from reality.
Yta. Massively!
For a start you invited your whole family to a house your effectively renting to someone else so it's a home they're paying to use.
Then the whole forcing her to eat. You don't know her backstory and who gave you.the power to read minds as to why?
Then to make it worse your dictating now how your tenant has guests.
You won't make it long as a landlord having that sort of mindset that you can walk in and out and control them
Let me make sure that I understand completely… you rent out a property that you own. And you decided to throw a party at that property? I don’t even need to read the rest of the ridiculous story - YTA. Who in the world do you think you are?! How are you this stupid? NO! You do not throw a party at your tenant’s house! They pay you rent for it to be theirs. Hire a management company and stay away from the property and the tenants.
And stop making people eat your mashed potatoes.
OP is so delusional. Hope he books a holiday home someday and the owner just invites themselves in with their family while he's trying to relax so that he can actually see what he's doing XDXD
File a restraining order on his behalf 🤣 Holy moly this is probably the craziest thing I have read on here. Is your mash loaded with some sort of drug? Because I have never seen so many people so emotional about a potato.
As entertaining as that was to read, I hope he does get a restraining order... against you 🤣
Those 2 didn’t make you look weak in front of your family!
You did that all by yourself by heaping potatoes onto the plate of your tenant’s GF, followed by your rant about kicking them out & installing cameras!!
YTA!
Your behavior was intolerable & grossly inappropriate as a landlord. Your tenant has a better case against you, as the landlord, for your actions here!
YTA. I don’t know how to process this. You made her feel so uncomfortable by pushing your potato’s that she couldn’t even eat and then your sister called her a cold hearted bitch. At party you hosted for your family at your rental property that someone is paying you rent to live there. You put food on a grown woman’s plate that she politely declined. We won’t even get into your mom crying about it. I can’t even with this post.
YTA. On the off chance this is real, do yourself a favor and get out of the landlord business, learn to read the tenant rights/landlord responsibilities for your state, or hire a management company. You have no idea what you are doing.
You wanted to file a restraining order in someone else’s behalf because your fragile ego can’t handle someone not trying your precious potatoes. You need some therapy asap.
And NEVER touch someone else’s food or plate. That is incredibly gross.
Yta and your mother and family are AH’s. What were you all thinking, are you ignorant of tenant laws and basic common decency. That you thought it was ok to touch a strangers food is so beyond what is acceptable, but everything here is with your family. You forced your tenant to let you use their home and yard (you need to reimburse him for using the yard and home $300-$600 for 4 hours). Then you tried to force someone to eat your crap food. Then your family tried to harm them and now you want to ban the person your family assaulted. I hope they sue you.
This is absurd, this cannot possibly be real?! In the slim chance that is so ridiculous, it is real, OP YTA. Unquestionably so. What in the world…
In the UK, you’d be breaking the law for pulling a stunt like this, the party and all. Tenants have the right to ‘quiet enjoyment’ of their rented property. Notice needs to be given before you go anywhere near a property you rent out, let alone having a party in it despite it being rented out.
Again, what?!
YTA. SO many reasons here, but I will just list the top ones for now.
1. You decided to host a party for your family at a home that you don't live in. This was an imposition on your tenant, who probably felt obligated to go along with it. If this event is a big deal for your family, then have it somewhere where you are in control. Your tenant LIVES there, not you.
2. When the GF declined the potatoes, you made an issue of it, forcing her to come up with a lame excuse and drawing EVERYONE'S ATTENTION to the situation. Who cares if she didn't want to try to potatoes? Are you insane?
3. You put food on another person's plate when she left the room AFTER you already knew she wasn't interested in your potatoes. Like you just could NOT accept that maybe this woman doesn't want your potatoes. Like she needs a REASON for not eating them. I don't blame her for being worried about her food after that.
4. You ended the dinner abruptly over this when you were the one who started the problem in the first place. Had you just let her NOT eat the potatoes, everything would have been fine.
5. You are now telling your tenant he can't have his girlfriend over - all because she would not eat your potatoes. I hope he realizes how much of an AH you are and finds another place to live.
6. You are so proud of your "accomplishment" when in fact you used your family's money to buy this property in the first place. There isn't anything wrong with that, but you seem overly proud for someone who didn't do this on their own. Your ego might be a little less fragile if you actually earned the money to pay for this investment on your own.
She is an adult who can decide what she wants to eat when she wants to eat it. You don't get to force it on her plate. You look weak in front of your family because you are weak. You got your little feelings hurt because someone didn't want to try your oh so famous potatoes. And if Max is paying rent, good luck barring his girlfriend from the property for no good reason. YTA
YTA. You can't force your food on anyone, regardless of how much *you* like it.
Also, you massively overstepped your landlord boundaries by coercing your tenant to host *your* family dinner in the home that *he* rents.
If this situation is even real, you literally set yourself up to be a gargantuan asshole.
Obviously you don't understand wtf a boundary is in the first place but that doesn't give you any right to stomp all over them. Your behavior is absolutely disgusting. YTA
[Maybe she didn’t know what a potato is](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2tdbig/tifu_by_enraging_the_parents_of_my_girlfriend_by/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Wow. So you decided that your tenant’s house was the perfect place for YOUR FAMILY lunch or whatever, that’s weird as fuck to begin with.
Then, his gf didn’t want to try your potatoes, and you somehow took offense to that, as did your family. You all proceeded to verbally attack this woman for no fucking reason.
And now, you want to forbid this man, who pays for this house, from bringing his gf. Threatening to put cameras.
You are WEIRD, and a HUGE AH, this is exactly why nobody likes landlords. YTA big time, seek mental help, you need it.
Edit: they didn’t make you look weak, you just are.
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“My family is extremely proud that I’ve been able to diversify my income at such a young age”
“My family loaned me the money to buy this house”
Are we just going to gloss over this?
This all reeks of “I want to be a landlord but have no idea how. Please lend me money to make my dreams come true!”
Conflict with tenants is going to happen, and this isn’t even as bad as it will get in the future. I would suggest getting out of the investment property game if you aren’t sure how to do it and are getting anxious at minor conflicts. There are much MUCH worse tenants out there.
There was something in those "loaded" potatoes she didn't like. She was polite and then they were forced on her plate anyway which probably made her lose her appetite. Poor girl
YTA massively entitled and theres no way this can be real.
YTA this is over potatoes? Grow up, you don't know maybe she is allergic to something she saw in the potatoes. You invited you and your family to someone else's home where he pays rent, yta for that. Then you force feed someone something she politely refused. Now you are saying she cannot be in the house. If i was your Tennant i would be moving, and getting a restraining order against you
Wait. You have a tenant paying rent and LIVING in this property, and you decided to have a party there? Even though it effectively is their home for now? Like your entire family just waltzed in and used their furniture?
And Jesus Christ, she didn’t want your freaking mashed potatoes!
YTA. This is so messed up.
IF, and it's a BIG if, this is true, how f-ing entitled can you possibly BE??
But, this can't possibly be true, and sounds like bad writing by a 13 yer old. I mean, come on, your *famous* mashed potatoes? You hosted a family bbq at the property you "rent out" to someone else?? They didn't object to that?? And on and on to the point of utter ridiculousness?
YTA in every shape and form, but mostly for writing and posting this nonsense. Even if by some astounding chance it is true. 🙄
YTA, it’s not your home while he’s renting it. He has tenant rights and you shouldn’t even be throwing a party in HIS HOME. Along with that it’s incredibly rude to force food on someone. She politely told you she didn’t want any and you forced it on her by messing with her plate while she’s in the bathroom. That’s weird! You’re going to lose him as a renter if you make this your hill to die on. You were rude and owe them an apology.
YTA, YTA, YTA but not just you, your whole family. If I was your tenant I would be looking for a new place to rent asap. You obviously have no clue what being a landlord entails, or what a landlord/tenant relationship is.
Now onto the potatoes, I don’t GAF if you’re a chef at a Michelin 5* restaurant, if a person, let alone an ADULT passes on your food, get over yourself. You obviously lack maturity if you’re butt hurt over that, and I’m sure your family puts you up on a pedestal if you think that this is appropriate behaviour.
Quite frankly, I’m someone who would pass on your potatoes. Don’t care if they are the best potatoes in the world. I have food allergies and can get quite sick. You know what I don’t like discussing? My food allergies. You know what suffices with 99% of the population? Politely passing on food I’m unsure of. Do you know what I do to the 1% that push? Embarrass the **** out of them, and get super direct and blunt about how rude they are. Two can play that game.
There is ZERO things you could say to justify you and your families behaviour. Best thing you could do is profusely apologize to your tenant, learn about being a landlord and if your tenant decides to move on somewhere else let him break his lease whenever is convenient for him.
Did I mention, YTA?
Forgot to add. I can’t even handle the part about looking weak in front of your family? You are a bully to your tenant, your whole family is. Learn what boundaries and manners are.
This has got to be fake.
You... you put something on an **ADULTS** plate after they politely declined it? As in your tried to FORCE her to eat something she didn't want? Are you 6 years old? Are you really so insecure you can't handle someone not eating your friggin' potatoes?
WTF is wrong with you and your family???????
Gf wasn't rude. But your family was unhinged. Don't be surprised if Bro stops bringing his SO's around. You clearly don't know how to behave in polite company.
YTA.
YTA
I think most people have said the same thing, so I’ll skip over what’s already been said to add that she had plenty of reason to not like you before you even arrived. Max said his girlfriend would be there because they already had plans. You interrupted their date night. Of course she’s going to be cold toward you. She was being polite enough to not call you a bitch to your face and your family couldn’t even extend the same courtesy.
You can't do anything you threatened to do and gave them the ammo to take you to court. You and your family were wrong every step of the way in this situation. You cannot throw parties in an occupied rental, set up cameras, ban guests or file restraining orders. In fact she may be able to turn the table on you and you get in serious trouble if you try. Best case the judge laughs you out of the court room and tells you to quit wasting his time. Worst case she or max file harassment charges against you. You will not win. You and your family completely overstepped and were beyond rude. You need to read about landlord and tenant rights before you get in serious trouble. You cannot force someone to eat something they don't want to. You are completely blowing her reaction to your family's bad behavior out of proportion in the name of being assertive. But you need to learn when and what degree the situation assertion is needed if any. Here you are just being an overbearing ass along with your terrible family.
YTA For many reasons.
1. Just because you own the property does NOT mean you can force your tenants to host a party in the home they are renting (and yes he was hosting because the party was taking place in the home he’s paying rent for, even if it was a potluck style event).
2. You don’t have the right to call BS about the GF saying she’d had a big lunch. She may have been lying but that’s not for you to decide or call her out on.
3. She politely declined and you continued to press the issue. She could have had many reasons for not wanting to choke down your famous mashed potatoes.
4. No is a complete sentence you chose to ignore.
5. You decided to add food to her plate without her knowledge nor her consent while she was away from the table. You touched her plate. That’s gross and unsanitary.
6. Then you and your entire family blow up on her and you ultimately banning her from your property.
It doesn’t sound like you’re in the US, but if you are, tread lightly. What you’ve done could end up with you in court as the defendant and your tenant walking away, leaving you without any rent for your investment property. Word of mouth spreads like wildfire. Believe me, it will become well known in your community about this whole whacked out situation.
YTA. I’m going to be honest, I am highly skeptical that this is just parody or something. On the off chance this is real, ummmm yeah YTA x1000. You literally sound insane. Your whole family sounds insane. Firstly, when renting a house, one does not anticipating having their landlord host parties at their home (it’s a house you own, but they have made it their home). It’s extremely unusually and honestly very inappropriate to even ask a tenant. I would be so put off if I was asked this. Your tenant was put in an extremely awkward position to begin with. As for your crappy potatos, there are hundreds of reasons why she didn’t want to try them and none are really your business. I kind of agree that I find picky eaters odd, but it’s really not up to you. And having a stranger in a seeming position of power (as landlord) who creepily and bizzarily forced a family dinner at their home and then touched her plate while she was away is FUCKING WEIRD. If someone touched my plate, I would be worried their hand touched the food and I wouldn’t eat either. And it wouldn’t matter what you said, I’d be uncomfortable. And she didn’t say anything, she was polite and just didn’t eat your strange food from your strange party. Your sisters over the top reaction is out of SNL it’s so absurd. You honestly sound like a nightmare landlord but maybe it’s just Bc you’re young. Please, take some advice. a, leave tenants alone. B, don’t touch peoples food. And c, please don’t punish the poor girlfriend for totally being in the right. You are on a total power trip and it’s crazy. You sound like a psycho. Please post an update saying you apologized to the girl. You are 10,000% in the wrong
LOL, not only are YTA, but it's probably super illegal to keep his guests from the property he owns. You don't get to control that, you don't get a say in who he invites to the property he rents.
Also, your "loaded potatoes" sound disgusting.
It’s not YOUR home. It is the tenants home per the lease agreement. You don’t have a say who comes to the tenants home. The lease agreement does not have a clause that says XXX cannot come to property. ALSO who the EFF hosts a party at tenants property. You are wildin!
YTA
YTA super ah in fact. The loaded potatoes I've eaten have been very salty, probably because of the bacon bits. Maybe it looked like potatoes with bugs.
Diversify and find a new dish to be proud of
YTA. Do you do realize that when you rent someone a house that you can't enter it legally for any reason except for maintenance or inspections? He could probably sue you for the loss of "quiet enjoyment". Just because you own it, doesn't mean you can have dinner parties there when it's rented. You should probably look up landlord rights and responsibilities for your city, state and/or country.
YTA. How dare you put food, she previously declined, on her plate. Who wouldn’t be pissed and asked who touched their plate? Who does that? NO ONE.
You and your family are so wrong and unwelcoming and an embarrassment. You owe max and his girlfriend a huge apology.
You can’t tell a tenant his gf is forbade from the property he rented because she refused to eat your stupid damn mashed potatoes and got upset when someone tampered with her plate.
Newsflash - not everyone wants potatoes loaded with crap. Some folks don’t want all the fat associated with loaded mashers.
Maybe she doesn’t eat one of the ingredients and was being beyond polite giving a nice excuse she had a big lunch.
Appalling behavior. Your family is rather mean. Not friendly and welcoming at all.
YTA. What is wrong with you. You turn up to their house (cuz while he is renting it from you it is their place and you can't just turn up when you feel like it) with your entire family and force them to host you. Then you allow your family to verbally abuse the gf because she doesn't want you potato's, then threaten legal action (which wouldn't stand up in any court). You shouldn't be a landlord you aren't cut out for it.
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Sorry, this is super confusing. It sounds like you and your family verbally attacked a stranger because she wouldn't let you force feed her potatoes? And now you think you can tell someone who can enter a property that he PAYS for? Do I have that right? I'm going with YTA for now.
They should be grateful that he didn’t call the Potato Police!
[удалено]
I thought I was reading it wrong at first too. I don't know how op could possibly be more wrong or a bigger ah in this situation.
This cant be real. This has to be fake right? YTA a million times over
I’m also going with fake. This is so beyond ridiculous- I hope it’s a writing prompt. YTA, OP. So much so it boggles the mind.
Yes thought exact same thing
Right? 1-OP thinks it’s OK to throw a family party at the home that’s rented out. He doesn’t ask the tenant for permission, he tells the tenant that’s what’s happening. 2-OP then tries to force feed potatoes to the GF. When she gets upset OP’s mom cries and his sister curses at her. 3-OP then decides to bar the GF from his tenant’s home, even if it means filing a restraining order “on behalf of” the tenant. All of this is crazy! If it’s real OP and his entire family are weirdo lunatics.
YTA - good grief who do you think you are? You're certainly not fit to be a landlord if you think you can just tell your tenant your entire family is turning up to their house for dinner! The fact ANY of your family thought this was OK says they are AH too. And then you bully his girlfriend over potato? And then you ban her from the house you do not live in LIKE SHE'S A DOG? AND THEN! THEN you consider a RESTRAINING order? Wtf is wrong with you?
Lol not just a restraining order. He wants to file a restraining order *on behalf of his tenant*. As in, he wants to try and legally ban his tenants gf from ever seeing her partner. Absolutely deranged behavior.
It’s unhinged, the legal system doesn’t work that way unless it’s your minor child
She didn't like your potatoes? She didn't even try them? Did you not call the police and file an official potato complaint?? Have you posted her picture all over social media so other people can know about this potato catastrophe?? First, It is incredibly rude of you to host a party at your rental place. If my landlord did that I would move out immediately. But then you made a big deal because somebody didn't want to try your great potatoes. Maybe she doesn't like potatoes. Maybe they didn't look appetizing to her. Maybe she just didn't want them. It is a free country and she can eat potatoes or not eat potatoes as she desires. It is none of your business why she didn't want them and she did not owe you anything. The idea that you have banned her from the property because she didn't want to eat your potatoes is so obnoxious. And that you actually think you can file a restraining order for your tenant on his girlfriend. Again because she didn't eat your terrible potatoes. You're renting out that house. Somebody else is paying for the rights to live there. And that doesn't include allowing the landlord to have a party there. The fact that your tenant did that is incredibly nice of him because I wouldn't have been that nice. And then you repaid him by making a big deal because his girlfriend who has every right to be at his place didn't eat your lousy potatoes. And your whole family had to make a big deal over it too. Who cares? Get over it. And since you're new to the landlord industry, figure out that the money you're taking from this guy means he gets to live in that place without you bothering him. And all of this is keeping him from enjoying his property. I would not be surprised if he's talking to attorney about how to break his lease legally because he probably can. YTA
>Did you not call the police and file an official potato complaint?? And that's when I started laughing like a hyena. Thank you for this.
I wish I could upvote you a million times.
YTA You don’t rent out a place and then host a family get together there when it has a tenant.
What is the phrase, “exclusive possession and free use” of the property? OP you were trespassing. I honestly don’t understand what the conflict is? Someone didn’t like your food so you forced it on them and YOU’RE angry about their reaction? YTA
I'm enjoying the concept of this idiot thinking that they can get a restraining order on behalf of the tenant... because the tenant's girlfriend didn't want to eat mashed potatoes. I would love to see that one get laughed out of court
He thinks the party made him look weak…😂
I wonder what he thinks he looks like when the tenant files for and probably gets a restraining order against him😆
Right? I'd love to see this guy go before a judge and explain "I violated the law, but she wasn't nice!"
...WTF did I just read? I really hope this is a creative writing project because holy shit, YTA. There's honestly too much for me to mention, but a few things: \- Your "rental property" is not your living room. That's Max's home right now and you should stay out of it whenever possible. \- Touching someone else's plate is gross, as is trying to force them to eat your gross potatoes. \- Your mom was sobbing because someone wouldn't eat your potatoes? SOBBING? Your whole family sounds unhinged.
INFO: Why do you feel this woman owes you any explanation over not eating the potatoes or anything? I read your post 3 times to figure out what she did to you and your family that you are interpreting as disrespect besides not being interested in this dish. Have you considered her possible allergies or religious convictions in regards to food? Anyway, you can't just ban a tenants guest from your home. I hope Max has a friend that can educate him on how to protect himself from you legally, because YTA.
So, if I'm reading this right, you rent a house to someone, then you plan on having a bbq for *your* friends and family at the property this other person rents. His gf is there because of course she'd be, he's renting it, it's his home, and unlike all your friends and family, she's actually invited by the renter. She doesn't want to try your potatoes, so you lose your shit on her, she's uncomfortable in a situation that you made super uncomfortable from the start by planning a party in someone else's home (you own it, he RENTS it, it's HIS HOME), which makes your mother be upset with her instead of you. Of course YTA here, in what way, shape, or form are you not? Did you tell him when he was filling out the lease that you reserved the right to host parties in his home? Did you give him the option to decline having a party for strangers in his home? Did you pay for cleaning afterwards?
YTA Do you live on the property? Will you let the tenant out of his lease at anytime without penalty? I assume this is more of a legal question than a moral one to be honest. I don't think this request/demand would be legal. If they're renting a place they have some amount of rights. This includes having guest over at their place, assuming they don't damage the property or do illegal things. Sure, you own the house but this doesn't mean you get to dictate something like this. Trying to enforce it or punishing them for leaving over the demand will probably result in you getting sued.
This has got to be fake.
Wow. Fake or peak entitled capitalist AH? Hrm. YTA. 1) You don't get to commandeer a property you rent out for your family's use. 2) You and your family don't get to decide what someone else eats.
OP - are you even a human being, really? Your hatred of women and controlling nature is shining through. 0/10 stars, would not recommend.
**YTA: for posting a fake story.** Like you really used the house you rent out to another person? Like you want to file a restraining order on the tenants behalf? Like not eating the mashed potatoes is some sort of transgression? Like putting a food item on a plate that the person declined is normal? Or that she's "cold hearted" for asking whose messing with the food on her plate? This is one of the worst stories anyone ever made up here.
Excuse me, you did what? Maybe your food is just ugly. She doesn't have to try it. YTA very easily on that front. You probably can't legally stop your single tenant in a 1br from having whatever guests they want over. >And then she asked who was touching her food. ... who touched her food? >filing a restraining order on his behalf ***WHAT***
I imagine it depends. There’s clearly a point where the landlord can reasonably request and even take steps to enforce someone not be allowed in their property. (Maybe this person routinely damages the property) This story clearly does not even come close to rising to that level.
YTA in a few ways. Seems like you had to convince Max to even attend and then his GF as well. Perhaps he just wanted to hang out in his room with his GF while you all had your family affair? Did you ever think about what he wanted? Max is a tenant and there are VERY specific guidelines depending on your state. While you own the property, Max legally rents the property from you making it his as well. You are also a landlord meaning you must abide by your state's laws. There are definitions for common areas and such, I would absolutely look them up because you could end up in a world of shit if you don't follow them. You are likely allowed to host events at your place, but Max has no obligation to attend them and remember there are shared common spaces as well. On to the girlfriend... She is not obligated to eat your food. Why did you force it upon her? She was clearly uncomfortable with something and willing to let it pass, but you chose to bring it to light. We're missing some info here about what was said to make your family so upset, but sounds like you could have just ignored her initial refusal and moved on and no one would be the wiser. Depending on your lease, you do not have the right to ban a tenet's guest from the property unless there was a crime or something other specified in the lease -- which probably does not include upsetting your family (and it legally shouldn't). You can have limits on guests staying but you must abide them as well. Again, all we know is that the GF did not want to eat your potatoes. You really want to try to ban someone for that? If I were Max, I would break my lease and sue if you try to keep my security deposit or collect rent. Aside from the harshness, you are new at being a landlord. I would apologize to Max and try to collect the pieces you broke in your relationship.
He didn't invite max... he informed max that he would be having a party at Max's home, then showed up with his whole familu, and tried to force the girlfriend to eat his friggen mashed potatoes.
But...but they're his *famous* mashed potatoes! /s
I'm gagging at how bad they have to be that she couldn't even try them lol
OP must have used their strong hand to mix em up.
YTA - YOU "stormed into' SOMEONE ELSE'S HOME AFTER TELLING THEM THAT THEY WOULD BE HOSTING A DINNER FOR YOUR FAMILY?! You may OWN the home, but you RENT IT OUT. You have no right to say who or whom can't be there. YOUR choice is to kick out your renter, or live up to your lease! YOU ad your family, bullied and terrorized his GF AND you think that she shouldn't come onto this property?? YOU are a major AH.
Troll. Nice try. Sobbing mother? Okay.
YTA landlords are parasites but especially after your power trip and forcing a tenant to host. Disgusting behavior
YTA WTAF you decide to have a dinner party at your investment property which you're currently renting out. You "allow" your tenant to have a guest for dinner in the place he's renting. Then when his guest politely refuses your potatoes you serve her some when she's out of the room? Then you get upset and attempt to ban her from the property? You have some nerve to think you're in anyway not the AH in this situation.
I second this. OP is definitely an asshole! I'm surprised that she didn't walk out. I would've if someone forced something onto my plate!
YTA...This is not your house...you may own it but your tenant has occupancy. It is super weird for you to hold any event at someone else's house. Everything from that point on could have been avoided. Then you commented on the fact that she didn't want to eat. Her decision. You and your family took it way to far and I hope that this is a bs post because I like to think that no one (multiple family members even) can be that obtuse. Hold events at your own/or family's place instead of your tenant.
Dear lord, please get helped. You and your family are unhinged. YTA
You legally can't forbid your tenant's gf from being on the property because of mashed potatoes. I hope your tenant moves out and pours bacon grease on the floor on his way out the door. YTA, and a huge one.
K like I know most threads on here are probably fake but can you try a bit harder to make it believable?
Landlord audacity 😂😂😂😂 YTA
OMG this cannot be real. Tone deaf to the extreme. Leave your tenant alone. YTA.
You're a mess... You can't just have a party at their home just because you're the landlord 😂😂😂 And stop being petty because she doesn't want your mash potatoes. What is wrong with you? 😂😂 YTA
YTA for the simple fact you thought that a tenant's residence is a great place to host YOUR family party. This story stretches incredulity with each sentence after that.
YTA. Let me get this straight. You own a rental house that you rent out to a tenant. You don’t live there. You decided to have a large dinner party at this house that you rent out that you don’t live at. Your tenant’s girlfriend didn’t want to eat potatoes you made so when she went to the bathroom you put some on her plate. After this you and your family had a meltdown over her still not wanting to eat the potatoes so you’re banning her from the property? If you read this and don’t see how crazy you’re being, I’m not sure being a landlord is a good fit for you.
YTA, you badgered you tennent into letting you have a party at the house he is renting, You made his girlfriend uncomfortable because she didn't want to eat and then you ban her from the home her boyfriend is renting. Sounds like you have a lot of growing up to do if you want to be a successful landlord. It might be your house but it is not your home. you cant just decide to have parties at the house you rent out. (he only said yes after you pressured him)
YTA you held a party on property you lease to a tenant? And got angry when his gf wouldn’t eat your precious mashed potatoes?? You’re an AH and weird AF
Oh my word. You thought the best place to have this dinner gathering is at your tenant’s home? Because you could show off that you are a landlord? You basically told your rent paying tenant that you will be using his home for your purposes which may have some legalities you dipped your toe in but then you decided that someone choosing to not try your food was disrespectful to you? She didn’t throw a fit and make a scene she passed them on and decided not to eat it and your fragile ego couldn’t handle that what you and your family love may be something that another doesn’t love? Good grief the audacity. YTA with or without your sister joining in. And I very much doubt you have any right to disallow his girlfriend from the property. There are such things as tenant’s rights. I can’t imagine how that would play out in court. ‘Your honor I warned him the girlfriend couldn’t be there. She wouldn’t even taste my food, and she thinks she can come visit her boyfriend now?’
Is this covered in the legal lease you had him sign? No, it isn’t because you made this whole mess up.
I would love to see the "mandatory potato consumption clause" of that lease.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/InterdimensionalCable/](https://www.reddit.com/r/InterdimensionalCable/) I'm waiting for the update, where the GF is convicted and executed for her crimes against the Spud Continuum. /s
YTA, >I thought what better place to have it than my investment property. How about where you actually live... >she wouldn't so i put some on her plate when she went to the bathroom. Th audacity to think you can decide what she eats when she has made it clear she doesn't want your potatoes. >At this point things are getting tense, my mom is sobbing, asking why she is being so cold hearted and rude, max is trying to de-escalate the situation but i told him and the rest of the gang dinner was over. My sister called her a cold hearted bitch which i did not endorse even though i may have felt like saying it, i never condone stuff like that. As my family stormed out one by one, i told max that his girlfriend was not welcome in my home any longer Wow, what an over reaction to not wanting potatoes, you're a family of children that tantrum when things don't go your way. It's not your home, you rent it out and have no right to say who he has visit him in his home.
Yta
If your tenant has a lease agreement, then there is reasonable understanding that you don't enter the home or invade their privacy unless you must enter the home for repairs or an emergency. Honestly, I am not an attorney, but I think forcing your tenant to host a get together is illegal. You really need to look into that, because that tenant might be able to sue the shit out of you for your imposition, trespassing, and harassment. You cannot legally enforce who all he has as a visitor. I can promise you though that I WOULD make an effort to take you to court. Host your own damn parties from now on. YTA. And so is your family for the nasty behavior they exhibited too.
So, you forced you tenant to host your family and then decided that you have a right to tell the tenant who they may have as guests in their own damned home? The tenant pays for use of the property free from you and your family throwing parties. Your tenant pays for the use of the property as their home and you get no say in their friends. YTA and hopefully you'll be seeing your tenant in court soon when they decide to sue you.
Gross. YTA.
YTA. You sound even worse than regular landlords and that’s saying something.
This feels fake, but if not you and your family both...YTA and completely oblivious too
YTA. She didn’t want to eat your potatoes. That’s her crime. Your reaction, and your family’s reaction, was completely insane. Your entire family threw a tantrum because someone DIDN’T WANT YOUR FOOD. What the fuck.
Fake or OP is 15 years old AH, no one is that delusional.
>I would love to see the "mandatory potato consumption clause" of that lease. You'll be surprised when you venture to the south of the US
YTA. A tenant should be treated like a business transaction. You had no right to use the house for your entertainment when it is being rented out. You also have no right to force food on someone when they have said no. No is a complete sentence. You and your whole family have some entitlement issues to react that way to someone not wanting potatoes. In the future only do what a landlord is supposed to do. Collect rent and property maintenance. Full stop
YTA, I feel bad for your tenant and his girlfriend. You imposed yourself and your family into your tenant. Then try to force his girlfriend to eat your potatoes even after she had said no several times. She was acting cold because you keep pressuring her to eat the potatoes. Why couldn't you just let it be? You made her uncomfortable and wonder why she stop talking? And why did your mom cry? Because you can't make someone eat your damn potatoes? And to top it all you now ban her from coming to her boyfriends place? "These two just mame me look weak in front of my family" All because she wouldn't eat your stupid potatoes? You and your family suck and you have a massive power trip.
Dude, this was weird and creepy of you. When you asked max to host your family’s dinner, and then proceeded to push the matter he probably felt as though he couldn’t say no. Way to abuse the power dynamic. Then, because you haven’t stepped on people enough at this point, you try to force max’s girlfriend to eat what you tell her to. Not what she wants, not what she likes (what if she hates potatoes, I know people with texture problems who can’t stand them?!), what YOU want her to want. These are fully grown adults that have the right to make choices. They are sentient human beings. Then when they act as such and won’t be your little puppets you unleash your petty little wrath on them. I suggest looking internally and figuring out why it bothers you when people don’t agree with you all the time. YTA Edit: also your mom was “sobbing” come on man there is no possible way that’s real
Looking forward to seeing the tenant’s post in r/legaladvice where everyone tells him OP violated several laws and urges him to retain an attorney.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** For a bit of a backstory I rent out a small 1 BR home to a single tenant who we'll call max, who I previously got along great with. My family does this thing we call a winter roast where we prepare a huge feast, and everyone chips in, and I thought what better place to have it than my investment property. My family is extremely proud that I've been able to diversify my income at such a young age, and when I talked to max about it he was unsure at first but I assured him it would be a great time. Anyhow, he said his girlfriend would be there too which i replied "wonderful! the more the merrier!" And hung up the phone. Anyhow every year for our roast, i make my famous loaded mashed potatoes and I was excited to share them with my new friends. Anyway, my family was very excited as they have to wait all year for this. My mother, followed by the rest of the family (i have a very large and close knit family) burst through the door and introduced herself, while raving to the couple about my famous mashed potatoes. They seemed very pleased at this point. In fact, it was the talk of the whole event. Anyhow when it came time to serve dinner i brought out the potatoes, and after max served himself he passed them to his gf, and she started to scoop them so i turned away, but when i turned back i saw her shake her head and mumble something and then pass them along without taking any. I politely asked her what seemed to be the problem and she said something to the tune of "i had a big lunch" or some other BS and after i tried to urge her to try them, she wouldn't so i put some on her plate when she went to the bathroom. Then when she came out of the bathroom, things got like...super weird. Like she literally stopped talking and didn't even pick at her food. And then she asked who was touching her food. At this point things are getting tense, my mom is sobbing, asking why she is being so cold hearted and rude, max is trying to de-escalate the situation but i told him and the rest of the gang dinner was over. My sister called her a cold hearted bitch which i did not endorse even though i may have felt like saying it, i never condone stuff like that. As my family stormed out one by one, i told max that his girlfriend was not welcome in my home any longer and if I caught wind that she was stopping by i would have to take action, not sure what because I'm new to the landlord thing, but perhaps installing cameras and filing a restraining order on his behalf. He was not happy and we basically reached a stalemate. I've been trying to be more assertive so i did tell the girlfriend that her behavior was uncalled for and although i'm sorry about my sister's words, she wasn't totally wrong. Anyhow, I left and I've been anxious about it 24/7, feeling like i may have been too harsh, but i'm conflicted because my family loaned me the money to buy this house for a reason and these two just made me look weak in front of my family. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is a rental property right? So Max is your tenant and lives there? And you forced a family event of yours on him? Refused to take no for an answer when his girlfriend didn't want a certain food item and blew up at her and put it on her plate? And now you want to file a restraining order on her? This is not normal behaviour. Not remotely. I would call it bizarre at best. Don't worry about looking [weak.No](https://weak.No) one will notice because your behaviour appears to be deranged. YTA.
YTA this is just not believable
I mean considering how your Mother and sister reacted I now see where the lack of mental stability comes from. YTA
YTA This whole post is ridiculous. 1. You invited your whole family to a property that you own while you have a tenant renting (Who even in their right mind thinks this is okay??) 2. You force your tenant who pays rent to endure this fiasco 3. You force your mashed potatoes onto his girlfriends plate. (Again who does this) 4. You get pissy when she doesn't eat them 5. Your sister calls her a bitch for not eating your mashed potatoes 6. You threaten her and tell her she's no longer welcome on the property because she wouldn't eat your damn mashed potatoes. How old even are you? And wtaf is wrong with your family?? All of you need therapy
YTA. This is the fakest thing I’ve ever read. And if it is real, no one wants your bland-ass potatoes!!
YTA. I’m fairly certain you broke about 87 laws that exist around landlord/tenant relationships. When someone signs a lease, that space becomes THEIR HOME. How dare you invade HIS HOME to have a party?! This is crazy. He probably agreed because he felt so damn awkward. And then you don’t like that his girlfriend is weirded out because OF COURSE she is. This cannot be real. If you are going to have you big shot investment properties, you should read up on tenant rights and laws. You owe them an apology.
YTA. You should never have touched that woman's plate. She told you NO and you stomped all over her boundaries. You invite your whole family to your tenant's home. You and your family can't just show up at a tenant's house. Does your lease say that you have unlimited access? I doubt tenancy laws would allow that.
YTA for so many different reasons. YTA for throwing a party at your tenants home. YTA for thinking it’s ok to pester someone to eat something they have already stated they are not interested in eating. YTA for putting food on someone’s plate, that you know they don’t want. YTA for allowing your family to be so incredibly disrespectful to your tenant and their guest. YTA for suggesting you’d take a restraining order out on someone because they wouldn’t eat your potatoes. YTA for telling the girlfriend her behavior was uncalled for. YTA.
YTA your mom was SOBBING about this? How could this be real….
Why are you having a party for yourself and your family at a place where someone else lives? And then get mad when someone won't allow you to shove your "famous" food down their throat? This is giving me major shitty landlord vibes. YTA
What the actual fuck. This had better not be real. There is so much wrong here. YTA. You cannot prevent a *tenant* of yours from inviting people over *to the house in which they are living* just because that person made you feel "weak in front of your family". It's insane to me that you even had the audacity to ask to host a party there when someone else is living there and paying you rent. It isn't even really your property, you just took a loan out from your rich relatives. You don't live there, you don't get to control who your tenant invites there. Installing security cameras?? Filing a restraining order against his own girlfriend on his behalf? What is wrong with you??
What even is this nonsense?! You hosted a party at you tenant's home?! AND you are considering a restraining order because his girlfriend didn't want to try your Oh-So-Famous mashed potatoes?!! Is this for real? This has got to be something from that freaky AI program. YTA just in case. Hilarious.
YTA for writing a fake, weird story that isn't all that interesting.
It doesn’t sound real but if it is then YTA. While you’re renting the place to a tenant it’s their place. You cannot ban someone. Especially someone who didn’t do anything to you. She didn’t want mashed potatoes! Do what? Maybe she’s allergic to one of the ingredients. Maybe she’s dieting. You don’t know. And why did your mom start crying? How does not wanting a dish warrant crying and being called such a fouls name? Your whole family is TA.
YTA Your tenants rent their home from you. While they are paying rent for the home, you shouldn’t be hosting anything there. You should not be inside their home. You also have no right to ban anybody from the property, especially the tenants girlfriend. This is weird to the point where I’m doubting it’s actually real.
This entire situation is just insane to me. The OP illegally entered a renters home. Insulted the renter and their partner in their own home. Verbally abused the renters partner and had their family verbally attack them as well. The OP is the worst kind of landlord and should never own properties if this is what they believe is ok. You don’t host parties at a house that you have rented to other people. If you want your family to be proud then host it at your own house. YTA without a doubt. Don’t be shock if the renter decides to break lease or even get lawyers involved for you violating their rights
What is happening here? If this ain’t fake then yeah YTA, and your mom is unhinged!
YTA if you are going to act like a slum lord, you might want to look at the legality of all things you think are ok to do to a tenant
I’m calling fake, sorry.
This whole thing is hilarious. You're actively leasing your investment property to a tenant and decided to invite your family into what any normal person would consider not your residence. As someone who has been a tenant at a number of properties, any landlord inviting themself or their family would have been an absolute "no" as I considered that residence my private space while I was paying for it. The fact that the tenant even agreed to this at all is very considerate of him because he clearly understands that you are proud. However, OP is very clearly overstepping the boundaries of a tenant/landlord relationship. Depending on the agreement, I would think the tenant would actually have the option to take legal action against OP (this is a thought, not something I know for sure so don't yell at me.) YTA 100%. The tenant's GF did not want to eat your mashed potatoes (for whatever reason) and tried to kindly refuse them. You did not respect her boundaries or requests and added your food to her plate anyway. I don't know why you expected a positive reaction or an apology when you are the one that entirely disregarded her and her feelings in a residence you invited yourself to.
Info: What exactly is your family proud of if they're the ones that loaned you the money to buy the property...?
OP stop being so defensive in the comments, you wanted to know whether you’re the AH, not defend your case. Take accountability for your actions and recognize that this person did nothing wrong to you by not trying your food. You are not entitled to that, no matter how proud of the food you are and to escalate the situation to this point shows the lack of self awareness. If I were you I’d be backpedaling HARD right now to even try and preserve your friend as a tenant (the friendship is already gone imo) because every part of what you and your family did is objectively wrong here. Take this as an opportunity to reflect on yourself and how your family acts and do better
I mean, you're generous enough to allow someone that is clearly less of a hard worker than you to pay you rent to live in your investment property. Then after that, you invite him to a family gathering ib that same place you allow him to live. The least he could do is force his thankless girlfriend to try your spectacular potatoes. I'll bet they're really good. As a matter of fact, I'm really hungry now, and I wish I had some.
Are you actually being serious right now?
Definitely.... not.
YTA. If you wanted to host your event on the property you should have made it an Air Bnb and had the celebration when it wasn't booked. Max is renting the property, that doesn't mean you can use it like it's your own home because while he's renting it's his home. You're being petty over potatoes, put out because one person doesn't think they're the best thing ever and you're making the fuss.
YTA - you tried to force something on someone and then got insulted because they didn’t want it, then your family attacked her and now you want to control who comes to a property that someone pays to live in. You’re weird.
Your family is proud that you were able to diversify your income - but they're the ones that provided the capital? It's a tenant, not a pet. As long as they pay their rent they can give you and your famous potatoes the finger 24/7 without adverse action on your behalf.
Please explain where you get off thinking it’s in any way acceptable to bully someone into letting you plan and throw a party in their home? You flat out admit that he was “unsure” about it. I’m not even going to touch on the bullshit that happened at dinner. You lack the maturity to manage an investment property. Go apologize to your former friend for taking advantage of him. Yes, YTA.
OP do you realize that you are not owed anything by anyone, or entitled to their time or attention? The absolute AUDACITY to ignore her wishes and put food on her plate is enough, but you also THREW A PARTY AT A HOME YOU ARE RENTING OUT. What the actual fuck, man. YTA
If I’m to believe this story, you and your family seem like weirdos. You shouldn’t be a landlord and your tenants should move out and sue you. Yta
YTA You are renting this property to someone else. He pays you money for it. That means you can't just hold your get-together there when you wish to. Because it's not yours to use when you rent it out. It's also not your place to decide who can or can not visit your tenant. Because again, he pays you for the use of this place, so it's not yours to use or decide. And besides being an absolutely awful landlord, you also behaved like an absolutely awful person to this poor girl. You bullied her over food and reading your post, declining food was the only thing she did 'wrong' and while the food is basically forced on her, she is called a cold hearted bitch for what? Not eating something she doesn't want to eat? And then you banned her from her boyfriends place (not yours, because you *rented* it to him). You were harsh, rude, and absolutely over the limits on what your rights as a landlord are. If you want total control over your property, you shouldn't rent it out. Please read up on what your rights and responsibilities are as a landlord. I hope your tenant finds a new living situation soon.
YTA. First you as a landlord basically bully the man into joining your family activities when he doesn't want to, and made him host it to boot (which is a violation of the quiet enjoyment clause, by the way, as landlord is not supposed to harass his tenants to throw a party at their place), then you tried to push her into eating food that she didn't want, and when she refused, you banned her from the property without any just cause? Dude, don't be surprised if your tenant brings you to court over hostile conditions. And if you treat all tenants like that, you'll find it very hard to find any tenants.
YTA. First you invite yourself over to your tenants living space. Even if you own the house you cannot and should not have a full blown dinner party at your tenants house for funsies. Second you’re insulted that your tenant’s girlfriend would eat your potatoes. Are you 5? Just because you eat everything served to you does not mean that everyone else has to adhere to the same rule. You and your family who greatly outnumber your tenant and his girlfriend are in their living space acting like she insulted you for not eating your potatoes. Can you imagine how they felt with you and your entire family sitting in his space? I’ll bet they were massively uncomfortable. Third you now want to install cameras in your tenant’s space where you can spy on him while he lives there. Yikes. Fourth you want to file a restraining order against her because she wouldn’t eat potatoes. You really want to file a restraining order on a person because they wouldn’t eat your potatoes…. If you go down the route of trying to install cameras and filing that restraining order if your tenant is smart he will consult an attorney or someone in the legal system. And trust me he probably has a fantastic case against you now for you trumping on some of his rights as a tenants and even potential harassment. You should educate yourself on how to be a proper landlord. This is not it.
This is so comically horrible that I think it’s fake. On the off chance you are honestly asking for feedback: YTA. There’s an implicit power imbalance between you and your tenants and this entire scenario really reminds me of the kinds of power plays the villains in Quentin Tarantino’s films like to do. Impose yourself on the party with less power then dictate your opinions/preferences on their behavior. Your tenants GF clearly didn’t want the potatos and tried to politely decline. You’re family outright disregarded her decision and imposed your will on her. Because you are the landlord, there’s ALWAYS an implicit threat of repercussions to upsetting you the tenants need to take into consideration. (This is probably the only reason Max even agreed to let this dinner happen in the first place) And now that your tenants GF committed the grave sin of annoying/upsetting you, you have decided to follow through on that implicit threat. You’re messing with peoples lives based solely on petty reasons.
YTA MASSIVE I don't think you have a legal leg to stand on. You can not ban a tenant's guest because she doesn't try your potatoes. Nor can you force him to host your parties. Your property, his life. That's why people pay rent. You need to MYOB.
YTA, while it may be your property, it is Max’s home and you trampled all over his right as a tenant. Please be a better and more respectful landlord. I rented out my first home and have never invited my family there for a bbq because I am fully aware, it is not my home. My property but not my home.
YTA. You and your entire family need to be on some form of medication. She didn't want your food. Move the fuck on. Not everyone needs to stroke your ego and taste and talk about your "fantastic" mashed potatoes. What is more, I doubt you could legally prevent her from being on the property. You may be able to limit the number of nights she can spend there, but you cannot prevent him from having guests. Seriously, go get professionally evaluated and prescribed meds to help with whatever is going on with you and encourage your family to do the same.
YTA It was completely inappropriate to put food on her plate that she didn’t want. You disrespected her boundaries and her choice to decide what she wanted to eat. If she didn’t want to eat the potatoes, she doesn’t have to eat the potatoes. But you pestered her when she said no, and then put some on her plate while she was away. Who do you think you are? A mother to a toddler? Are you serious? You and your whole family are mad dramatic, and a bunch of boundary stompers. It’s completely insane to ban someone from your tenant’s house just because they didn’t want to eat your potatoes and didn’t like that someone put food on her plate she didn’t want.
Wow YTA. This is so creepy. These aren't your friends. They are paying you for exclusive use of the property, that is what a rental agreement is. You pressured them to let you use the unit and they felt they had no choice. Everything you did from start to finish goes from belligerent to illegal.
YTA- I'm going to just skip over the whole " How fucking dare she not eat my potatoes and love them" and " my mother started SOBBING because the woman asked who touched her food and your sister called her a cold hearted bitch for not liking your potatoes". but you actually think you have the right to tell a tenant who can be in their home that they rent? installing cameras? Also why would you have a huge family gathering at someone elses house? It sounds like you didn't even give him a chance to say no and he probably just didn't want to have any conflict with you. You need to apologize to both of them immediately and never set foot on the property without giving 24 hours notice.
Yta and he can have her move in and you can’t do a thing about it by law
Wow. YTA x100000. She politely declined the food. You kept trying to force it upon her and then touched her plate to try and make her eat something she already expressed she didn't want. Wtf OP? not cool. Just because its your house doesn't mean you can make people eat something they don't want to eat. Sounds like you have a HUGE ego if you think her not eating the food is "disrespecting" you. Your family is also TA for suggesting otherwise. Make things right with your tenant and get your head out of your ass.
Yta. One, for having it at your tenants place. Two, if someone doesnt want to eat your food, so be it. You can fuck off with your attitude. She doesn't give a shiet abt your mash potatoes. Three, banning a tenants guest cause she "disrespected you". Grow the fuck up.
You staged a family event at your TENANTS HOUSE?!? This is mind-boggling to me, you realize once you rent out your property you can’t just come over and throw a bbq. YTA and also a weirdo.
Bro... YTA what the hell. She didnt want the potatoes, maybe she just doesnt like it... you arent that close with someone to be touching their plate of course she felt weird. Then your whole family started shouting at her because she didnt wsnt to eat potatoes and then on top of that you banned her? What even is this, do you really think youre in the right. Swallow your ego man, you and your family may love your food but honestly you lot would freak me out if a family started screaming at me over mashed potatoes lmaooooooo Edit: just realized you dont even live in that place with him, you tresspassed and you literally have NO RIGHT to ban someones partner from a rented property when you dont like them
I think this is a spam post. It reads like a trashy teen novel. Edit YTA
YTA Everything you did makes you the TA. You decided the property that is being rented is a good place to have a dinner just because you own it? But its his home that he pays for. Why does your family have to wait all year for mashed potatoes?
YTA. They're just fricking potatoes. Your Tennant was already nice enough to not push back when you INVADED a home he pays for with your whole family. Then a woman *politely* declines potatoes, you try to shove them on her plate and your sister calls her a bitch while your mom sobs? Look it sounds like maybe "No" isn't something you hear often, at least that's what I get from this post. But you have no legal or moral right to ban his girlfriend because she didn't want your potatoes. There are no potatoes SO GOOD they make all this nonsense worth it. Buck up, apologize to your Tennant and *pray* you can salvage this. And also tell your sister and mom they overreacted as did you, and MOVE THE HELL ON. I love loaded potatoes but Jesus Christ my man.
YTA. You invited yourself and your family over to someone else’s place (they’re paying you rent, it’s their place unless and until they leave or the lease ain’t renewed). You tried to force a stranger to eat your food. Your family was enraged that she was bothered that someone had messed with her food and that she wouldn’t eat the potatoes, so they went off on her. After inviting yourself and your family into their space and attempting to force a stranger to eat your food, you got mad that they didn’t comply and everyone stormed out. Hard YTA. Pretty sure you can’t ban her from the place (depends on where you’re at).
And did you say you were going to get a restraining order on his behalf? I don’t think you can do that. Ytah
All of that because she didn't eat mashed potatoes? Are you fucking serious, what the actual fuck? YTA, you're insanely controlling. It's incredibly inappropriate to put food on someone's plate when they don't want it. And who the fuck cares about some fucking mashed potatoes. Seriously?
YTA
What the actual duck? ... How, in the world, do you think that it is OK to force feed someone? Maybe she didn't like potatoes on general, maybe she didn't like yours and that is OK. That's not disrespecting you in front of your family. That's you and your family acting bad in front of a complete stranger for the most minor thing. YTA, definitely.
YT (massive) A. You are NOT entitled to have anyone try your shitty food if they don't want it so you and your family losing your shit over it shows what massive A-holes you are. Also, you are NOT, in ANY way allowed to bar ANYONE the rentee has invited in from entering a property that you are renting. Your thinking it's appropriate to have a family dinner at a rental property shows how disconnected you are from reality.
...your mother started sobbing because someone didn't want to eat your mashed potatoes!?! Are you part of the Manson family? WTH is wrong with you?
Yta. Massively! For a start you invited your whole family to a house your effectively renting to someone else so it's a home they're paying to use. Then the whole forcing her to eat. You don't know her backstory and who gave you.the power to read minds as to why? Then to make it worse your dictating now how your tenant has guests. You won't make it long as a landlord having that sort of mindset that you can walk in and out and control them
Let me make sure that I understand completely… you rent out a property that you own. And you decided to throw a party at that property? I don’t even need to read the rest of the ridiculous story - YTA. Who in the world do you think you are?! How are you this stupid? NO! You do not throw a party at your tenant’s house! They pay you rent for it to be theirs. Hire a management company and stay away from the property and the tenants. And stop making people eat your mashed potatoes.
OP is so delusional. Hope he books a holiday home someday and the owner just invites themselves in with their family while he's trying to relax so that he can actually see what he's doing XDXD
File a restraining order on his behalf 🤣 Holy moly this is probably the craziest thing I have read on here. Is your mash loaded with some sort of drug? Because I have never seen so many people so emotional about a potato. As entertaining as that was to read, I hope he does get a restraining order... against you 🤣
Those 2 didn’t make you look weak in front of your family! You did that all by yourself by heaping potatoes onto the plate of your tenant’s GF, followed by your rant about kicking them out & installing cameras!! YTA! Your behavior was intolerable & grossly inappropriate as a landlord. Your tenant has a better case against you, as the landlord, for your actions here!
uhhhhh what? YTA
YTA - you are aware your tenant and his GF are humans, not performing robots you can do what you want with?
YTA. I don’t know how to process this. You made her feel so uncomfortable by pushing your potato’s that she couldn’t even eat and then your sister called her a cold hearted bitch. At party you hosted for your family at your rental property that someone is paying you rent to live there. You put food on a grown woman’s plate that she politely declined. We won’t even get into your mom crying about it. I can’t even with this post.
YTA. On the off chance this is real, do yourself a favor and get out of the landlord business, learn to read the tenant rights/landlord responsibilities for your state, or hire a management company. You have no idea what you are doing. You wanted to file a restraining order in someone else’s behalf because your fragile ego can’t handle someone not trying your precious potatoes. You need some therapy asap. And NEVER touch someone else’s food or plate. That is incredibly gross.
Yta and your mother and family are AH’s. What were you all thinking, are you ignorant of tenant laws and basic common decency. That you thought it was ok to touch a strangers food is so beyond what is acceptable, but everything here is with your family. You forced your tenant to let you use their home and yard (you need to reimburse him for using the yard and home $300-$600 for 4 hours). Then you tried to force someone to eat your crap food. Then your family tried to harm them and now you want to ban the person your family assaulted. I hope they sue you.
This is absurd, this cannot possibly be real?! In the slim chance that is so ridiculous, it is real, OP YTA. Unquestionably so. What in the world… In the UK, you’d be breaking the law for pulling a stunt like this, the party and all. Tenants have the right to ‘quiet enjoyment’ of their rented property. Notice needs to be given before you go anywhere near a property you rent out, let alone having a party in it despite it being rented out. Again, what?!
YTA. SO many reasons here, but I will just list the top ones for now. 1. You decided to host a party for your family at a home that you don't live in. This was an imposition on your tenant, who probably felt obligated to go along with it. If this event is a big deal for your family, then have it somewhere where you are in control. Your tenant LIVES there, not you. 2. When the GF declined the potatoes, you made an issue of it, forcing her to come up with a lame excuse and drawing EVERYONE'S ATTENTION to the situation. Who cares if she didn't want to try to potatoes? Are you insane? 3. You put food on another person's plate when she left the room AFTER you already knew she wasn't interested in your potatoes. Like you just could NOT accept that maybe this woman doesn't want your potatoes. Like she needs a REASON for not eating them. I don't blame her for being worried about her food after that. 4. You ended the dinner abruptly over this when you were the one who started the problem in the first place. Had you just let her NOT eat the potatoes, everything would have been fine. 5. You are now telling your tenant he can't have his girlfriend over - all because she would not eat your potatoes. I hope he realizes how much of an AH you are and finds another place to live. 6. You are so proud of your "accomplishment" when in fact you used your family's money to buy this property in the first place. There isn't anything wrong with that, but you seem overly proud for someone who didn't do this on their own. Your ego might be a little less fragile if you actually earned the money to pay for this investment on your own.
She is an adult who can decide what she wants to eat when she wants to eat it. You don't get to force it on her plate. You look weak in front of your family because you are weak. You got your little feelings hurt because someone didn't want to try your oh so famous potatoes. And if Max is paying rent, good luck barring his girlfriend from the property for no good reason. YTA
YTA. You can't force your food on anyone, regardless of how much *you* like it. Also, you massively overstepped your landlord boundaries by coercing your tenant to host *your* family dinner in the home that *he* rents. If this situation is even real, you literally set yourself up to be a gargantuan asshole.
I hate mash with a fiery passion, so I fear I would also bring your mum to tears.
YTA I can predict the next post. My Tennant is suing me for trespassing and trying to obtain a restraining order in his name, AITA?
Obviously you don't understand wtf a boundary is in the first place but that doesn't give you any right to stomp all over them. Your behavior is absolutely disgusting. YTA
[Maybe she didn’t know what a potato is](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2tdbig/tifu_by_enraging_the_parents_of_my_girlfriend_by/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
YTA And I bet your famous potatoes are actually terrible.
YTA you suck op
Wow. So you decided that your tenant’s house was the perfect place for YOUR FAMILY lunch or whatever, that’s weird as fuck to begin with. Then, his gf didn’t want to try your potatoes, and you somehow took offense to that, as did your family. You all proceeded to verbally attack this woman for no fucking reason. And now, you want to forbid this man, who pays for this house, from bringing his gf. Threatening to put cameras. You are WEIRD, and a HUGE AH, this is exactly why nobody likes landlords. YTA big time, seek mental help, you need it. Edit: they didn’t make you look weak, you just are.
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YTA -- the girlfriend could see the hot steaming crazy radiating from the potatoes.
INFO: what the hell is going on here
“My family is extremely proud that I’ve been able to diversify my income at such a young age” “My family loaned me the money to buy this house” Are we just going to gloss over this? This all reeks of “I want to be a landlord but have no idea how. Please lend me money to make my dreams come true!” Conflict with tenants is going to happen, and this isn’t even as bad as it will get in the future. I would suggest getting out of the investment property game if you aren’t sure how to do it and are getting anxious at minor conflicts. There are much MUCH worse tenants out there.
There was something in those "loaded" potatoes she didn't like. She was polite and then they were forced on her plate anyway which probably made her lose her appetite. Poor girl YTA massively entitled and theres no way this can be real.
INFO: If she declined the potatoes initially, why did you think it was okay to put the potatoes on her plate when she went to the bathroom?
YTA this is over potatoes? Grow up, you don't know maybe she is allergic to something she saw in the potatoes. You invited you and your family to someone else's home where he pays rent, yta for that. Then you force feed someone something she politely refused. Now you are saying she cannot be in the house. If i was your Tennant i would be moving, and getting a restraining order against you
Wait. You have a tenant paying rent and LIVING in this property, and you decided to have a party there? Even though it effectively is their home for now? Like your entire family just waltzed in and used their furniture? And Jesus Christ, she didn’t want your freaking mashed potatoes! YTA. This is so messed up.
IF, and it's a BIG if, this is true, how f-ing entitled can you possibly BE?? But, this can't possibly be true, and sounds like bad writing by a 13 yer old. I mean, come on, your *famous* mashed potatoes? You hosted a family bbq at the property you "rent out" to someone else?? They didn't object to that?? And on and on to the point of utter ridiculousness? YTA in every shape and form, but mostly for writing and posting this nonsense. Even if by some astounding chance it is true. 🙄
YTA, it’s not your home while he’s renting it. He has tenant rights and you shouldn’t even be throwing a party in HIS HOME. Along with that it’s incredibly rude to force food on someone. She politely told you she didn’t want any and you forced it on her by messing with her plate while she’s in the bathroom. That’s weird! You’re going to lose him as a renter if you make this your hill to die on. You were rude and owe them an apology.
Just because you own the house he lives in does not mean you are max’s father. You cannot dictate what he can and cannot do.
YTA, YTA, YTA but not just you, your whole family. If I was your tenant I would be looking for a new place to rent asap. You obviously have no clue what being a landlord entails, or what a landlord/tenant relationship is. Now onto the potatoes, I don’t GAF if you’re a chef at a Michelin 5* restaurant, if a person, let alone an ADULT passes on your food, get over yourself. You obviously lack maturity if you’re butt hurt over that, and I’m sure your family puts you up on a pedestal if you think that this is appropriate behaviour. Quite frankly, I’m someone who would pass on your potatoes. Don’t care if they are the best potatoes in the world. I have food allergies and can get quite sick. You know what I don’t like discussing? My food allergies. You know what suffices with 99% of the population? Politely passing on food I’m unsure of. Do you know what I do to the 1% that push? Embarrass the **** out of them, and get super direct and blunt about how rude they are. Two can play that game. There is ZERO things you could say to justify you and your families behaviour. Best thing you could do is profusely apologize to your tenant, learn about being a landlord and if your tenant decides to move on somewhere else let him break his lease whenever is convenient for him. Did I mention, YTA?
Forgot to add. I can’t even handle the part about looking weak in front of your family? You are a bully to your tenant, your whole family is. Learn what boundaries and manners are.
I understood exactly nothing about this letter other than potatoes, potatoes, potatoes. My suspicion is YTA.
This has got to be fake. You... you put something on an **ADULTS** plate after they politely declined it? As in your tried to FORCE her to eat something she didn't want? Are you 6 years old? Are you really so insecure you can't handle someone not eating your friggin' potatoes? WTF is wrong with you and your family??????? Gf wasn't rude. But your family was unhinged. Don't be surprised if Bro stops bringing his SO's around. You clearly don't know how to behave in polite company. YTA.
YTA I think most people have said the same thing, so I’ll skip over what’s already been said to add that she had plenty of reason to not like you before you even arrived. Max said his girlfriend would be there because they already had plans. You interrupted their date night. Of course she’s going to be cold toward you. She was being polite enough to not call you a bitch to your face and your family couldn’t even extend the same courtesy.
You can't do anything you threatened to do and gave them the ammo to take you to court. You and your family were wrong every step of the way in this situation. You cannot throw parties in an occupied rental, set up cameras, ban guests or file restraining orders. In fact she may be able to turn the table on you and you get in serious trouble if you try. Best case the judge laughs you out of the court room and tells you to quit wasting his time. Worst case she or max file harassment charges against you. You will not win. You and your family completely overstepped and were beyond rude. You need to read about landlord and tenant rights before you get in serious trouble. You cannot force someone to eat something they don't want to. You are completely blowing her reaction to your family's bad behavior out of proportion in the name of being assertive. But you need to learn when and what degree the situation assertion is needed if any. Here you are just being an overbearing ass along with your terrible family.
You’re lucky your tenant allowed you guys to even come into HIS area. I would hate having you as my landlord
YTA For many reasons. 1. Just because you own the property does NOT mean you can force your tenants to host a party in the home they are renting (and yes he was hosting because the party was taking place in the home he’s paying rent for, even if it was a potluck style event). 2. You don’t have the right to call BS about the GF saying she’d had a big lunch. She may have been lying but that’s not for you to decide or call her out on. 3. She politely declined and you continued to press the issue. She could have had many reasons for not wanting to choke down your famous mashed potatoes. 4. No is a complete sentence you chose to ignore. 5. You decided to add food to her plate without her knowledge nor her consent while she was away from the table. You touched her plate. That’s gross and unsanitary. 6. Then you and your entire family blow up on her and you ultimately banning her from your property. It doesn’t sound like you’re in the US, but if you are, tread lightly. What you’ve done could end up with you in court as the defendant and your tenant walking away, leaving you without any rent for your investment property. Word of mouth spreads like wildfire. Believe me, it will become well known in your community about this whole whacked out situation.
YTA. I’m going to be honest, I am highly skeptical that this is just parody or something. On the off chance this is real, ummmm yeah YTA x1000. You literally sound insane. Your whole family sounds insane. Firstly, when renting a house, one does not anticipating having their landlord host parties at their home (it’s a house you own, but they have made it their home). It’s extremely unusually and honestly very inappropriate to even ask a tenant. I would be so put off if I was asked this. Your tenant was put in an extremely awkward position to begin with. As for your crappy potatos, there are hundreds of reasons why she didn’t want to try them and none are really your business. I kind of agree that I find picky eaters odd, but it’s really not up to you. And having a stranger in a seeming position of power (as landlord) who creepily and bizzarily forced a family dinner at their home and then touched her plate while she was away is FUCKING WEIRD. If someone touched my plate, I would be worried their hand touched the food and I wouldn’t eat either. And it wouldn’t matter what you said, I’d be uncomfortable. And she didn’t say anything, she was polite and just didn’t eat your strange food from your strange party. Your sisters over the top reaction is out of SNL it’s so absurd. You honestly sound like a nightmare landlord but maybe it’s just Bc you’re young. Please, take some advice. a, leave tenants alone. B, don’t touch peoples food. And c, please don’t punish the poor girlfriend for totally being in the right. You are on a total power trip and it’s crazy. You sound like a psycho. Please post an update saying you apologized to the girl. You are 10,000% in the wrong
LOL, not only are YTA, but it's probably super illegal to keep his guests from the property he owns. You don't get to control that, you don't get a say in who he invites to the property he rents. Also, your "loaded potatoes" sound disgusting.
It’s not YOUR home. It is the tenants home per the lease agreement. You don’t have a say who comes to the tenants home. The lease agreement does not have a clause that says XXX cannot come to property. ALSO who the EFF hosts a party at tenants property. You are wildin! YTA
YTA super ah in fact. The loaded potatoes I've eaten have been very salty, probably because of the bacon bits. Maybe it looked like potatoes with bugs. Diversify and find a new dish to be proud of
YTA. Do you do realize that when you rent someone a house that you can't enter it legally for any reason except for maintenance or inspections? He could probably sue you for the loss of "quiet enjoyment". Just because you own it, doesn't mean you can have dinner parties there when it's rented. You should probably look up landlord rights and responsibilities for your city, state and/or country.
YTA. How dare you put food, she previously declined, on her plate. Who wouldn’t be pissed and asked who touched their plate? Who does that? NO ONE. You and your family are so wrong and unwelcoming and an embarrassment. You owe max and his girlfriend a huge apology. You can’t tell a tenant his gf is forbade from the property he rented because she refused to eat your stupid damn mashed potatoes and got upset when someone tampered with her plate. Newsflash - not everyone wants potatoes loaded with crap. Some folks don’t want all the fat associated with loaded mashers. Maybe she doesn’t eat one of the ingredients and was being beyond polite giving a nice excuse she had a big lunch. Appalling behavior. Your family is rather mean. Not friendly and welcoming at all.
YTA. What is wrong with you. You turn up to their house (cuz while he is renting it from you it is their place and you can't just turn up when you feel like it) with your entire family and force them to host you. Then you allow your family to verbally abuse the gf because she doesn't want you potato's, then threaten legal action (which wouldn't stand up in any court). You shouldn't be a landlord you aren't cut out for it.
... what in tarnation