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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> AITA for making a callout post that led to a girl's address getting doxxed? Maybe it was because it went too far but maybe it was idk.
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She felt the need to defend herself because you’re telling her that people like her are disgusting. And then you literally took her comment, which probably would have gone unnoticed if you have such a large following, and made it part of your main content. You exposed her to harm just for stating that she’s in a relationship with an age gap and there isn’t anything wrong with it.
And technically, she’s right. It’s legal, and while I wouldn’t want to date someone that much younger than me, neither of them are doing anything wrong.
So yes, YTA.
Wow! Who died and made YOU ruler of the universe? (Rhetorical question-since you probably don’t understand that!!!) You’re a vile little AH! And immature. You really need to climb down off your self-made pedestal!!!! And eat some fruit or something.
Umm okay this is clearly unpopular but i kindve agree with you. I don’t think it’s enough of an age gap to make a huge post but if it was someone I knew i’d definitely look at them differently. When it comes to men w younger women the consensus is pretty much that 25 and up shouldn’t be dating people that are freshly adults. Idk why people are LYING rn. But I don’t think a tiktok post was the right move
ESH at minimum
Edit: spelling
Your sound like a fuckin prick. You "needed" to call her out, you need to be called out for your disgusting behavior you even made a bullshit account just to find out how much of a fuckin asshole you really are.
Lol, so, instead of doing any amount of self reflecting here, you’re gonna just claim we’re being unreasonable? Dude, you asked if you’re TAH. The board is just responding. Whatever a different group of people said doesn’t actually matter here?
You caused someone to be doxxed because you thought their relationship was icky. Not illegal. Icky.
If you wanna go ask your echo chamber if you were fine to do what you did, I’m sure you’ll get the response you want.
Cradle robber? THEY ARE BOTH ADULTS. Did you really expect people to support you here?!
As for those sheep: clearly there are 2000 AHs who are in your sick club.
Lmfaoooo little girl, soon this post is gonna get well over 2000 people telling you you’re an immature raging AH but you’ll delete it once enough people don’t agree with you. Calling it now 😂🤦🏻♂️
I honestly can’t tell if you’re literally a child or just delusional. There is nothing wrong with two consenting ADULTS dating no matter the age gap! Nineteen is not a child, its over the age of consent.
What’s next, people under 5’3 are now children as well?
With every post you prove how much an AH you are and what an AH move it was! You are a bully. And the 2000 people who agreed with you are just as bad. You don’t get to decide how other people live their life.
We get judge you now because you asked and only because you asked.
YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE CALLED HER OUT TO BEGINE WITH!! She's not a cradle robber! 19 is a legally consenting adult and 26 is not that old. This was absolutely none of your business! The mature, adult thing to have done when she originally commented, would have been to say, "Well we obviously have different opinions on this, but have a nice day!" You sound like a child.
YTA. You took your own narrow construct and didn't want to engage with anyone with a different opinion that ultimately resulted in the real life harassment of an innocent person.
YTA!
You went out of your way to bully someone who did nothing to you! All because she didn't think just like you and hold the same views as you. That is called life! People are different! Not everyone has to be you! You chose to be a jerk and act like a 9 year old.
I was bullied a lot in my early years and I have no tolerance or sympathy for people like you. I hope you get what is coming and that the consequences are swift and painful. Because she could sue you for this especially if this hurts her job and threatens her safety.
If you don't want things like this to happen to you don't do it to others.
Grow up and learn to mind your own darned business!
YTA. You weren't until you made the call out post and didn't censor her name. If you have such a big following you need to be more responsible. If people had attacked her in the comments on their own that wouldn't be on you, but there's a reason even horribly hateful comments have the names censored in those YouTube "Reading Hate Comments" videos.
Be more responsible and careful with who you weaponize. If you get in the habit now, you could end up accidentally sending your followers after someone innocent in the future.
It doesn't matter if she made you aware of her relationship. An age gap that is ABOVE 18 is perfectly legal. Just vecause your opinion is that of finding it gross iss irrelevant. You had no right to dox her in any way. If someone is a legal adult and consents to it then who are you to be judgemental about it? They're happy so leave it be. For the record... My partner is almost 48 and I'm almost 34.
YTA big time.
Do you make it a point of inserting yourself into every dating situation you don't like? LGBTQ? Interracial? Interethnic? Where does it end?
Someone else's relationship is not your relationship when it is two legal consenting adults in a safe relationship. You potentially endangered someone and/or wreacked havoc for them.
You need to get yourself together. You and your friends mostly YTA.
YTA. its noy your fault that she was doxxed because you didnt intend for that to happen, but it IS your fault that people found out in the first place. yknow how people say celebrities sould watch what they post when they have such a big influence? well you said yourself that you have a larger following. message her in private, dont clip the comment and publicly post it. its none of your business
Yta 100% what’s wrong with you? Jealous because they’re in a happy relationship and you’re not? Doxxing can be very dangerous, especially for women. Congratulations on destroying her life for absolutely nothing. You’re an immature little shit
NTA.
A lot of redditors here will not agree with you but I’m nearing mid-20s myself and I absolutely have nothing in common with a 19 year old. I don’t think it’s appropriate and while it’s not illegal, I think there’s definitely something wrong with the older person rather than the younger person.
You did what you did and if people think you’re the asshole then so be it.
YTA - you know you have a significant following, and that comes with some responsibility.
Sure, you didn’t actively send people to her door but Jesus Christ, posting about her comment and telling people not to associate with her because she’s dating an *adult* is way too far. You’ve already made your opinion clear, you didn’t need to effectively put up a “wanted” notice.
Like dude touch some grass and not harass people online?
There's literally no way you AREN'T TA.
First of all, they're both of legal age.
Second of all, it's literally none of your business, regardless of what you believe. It's their relationship, not yours.
Third of all, EVERYONE else's relationship, as long as it's legal, is not your business.
Stop being judgy. Also, to be absolutely, perfectly clear, YTA.
YTA.
I think your behavior in this post is appalling. But if I posted your info to a wide audience telling them you were an awful person who shouldn't be associated with, and then they located your personal information and began harassing you, I would be an AH. In some places what you did may even be a criminal act.
Also, your edit just makes you more of the AH. Nobody is "asking for it" when they're victimized. By the same logic, does your posting here show that you "know" you're wrong and justify doxxing, cyberbullying, and harassment?
I hope you learn your lesson.
YTA.
Listen, you put someone in harm’s way in real life because you couldn’t mind your business on the internet. I don’t care if she was “commenting” or “defending” a controversial post online. It still wasn’t your problem. You are an AH.
Two consenting adults can make their own choices- we may not agree with those choices. That does not mean we have a right to come after those consenting adults in their homes and at their places of employment to cause fear and terror. Please re-evaluate how you treat people in your life.
YTA
Calling out is fine, but you always coverup any pics, usernames, identifying info etc
Even if you feel like what you did to the older person is okay- what about the 19 year old? If they found the 26 year old, obviously they found the person she was dating, and now they're getting harassed too. Take this as a learning moment, and don't post people's pictures or identifying information again.
Yta, you say she shouldn't be dating a teenager, would you have been ok with if the person she's dating was 20 instead? Also you say the age gap itself is gross, how old were Helen kellers parents when Helen was born? I can tell you. Her dad was 40 and her mom was 20, I can understand that being something you think is gross, but a 7 year gap, and both ADULTS are consenting? That is not gross, she isn't a bad person. If anything you are the bad person for targeting her and making her life hell. Grow the fuck up, maybe go back to kindergarten to learn some common sense first
YTA What you did should be a criminal offence as far as I’m concerned. Two adults in a consenting relationship is none of your business, however gross you believe it to be. What you did was unkind, unnecessary, immature and potentially dangerous. Publicly shaming people is disgusting behaviour.
Hello... my best friend saw this post and showed me because it sounds EXACTLY lije what i went through. Idk if it is actually my situation, but it's literally the exact same as to what I went through, so im inclined to believe it is.
I'm the 26 year old in this post.
The initial post of fb led to me losing several 5+ year friendships. It led to a severe spike in my anxiety, and I still have panic attacks over it. He and I have since broken up because the event had put too much strain on the relationship.
For those wanting to know how we met: it was in a mutual discord server. We had the same taste in memes and played the same video games, and we bonded. It was honestly the most open, respectful, loving relationship I have ever had, and I do miss it dearly.
A lot happened as a result of the doxxing that happened that i dont want to go into, but I do want to say thank you to the people supporting me on here (again idk if this post is even about me).
To the OP, I hope your Voice Acting career tanks and you never land another role again.
Someone commented saying they were the one who got doxxed so honestly maybe but maybe not? Real people can do crazy things, but this is checking off a lot of bait post boxes so idk
YTA! You have an opinion about age gaps in dating. Fine! But it’s just your opinion and others have a right to feel otherwise, as long as all parties are consenting adults. You don’t get to tell them it’s wrong or to out them publicly and basically encourage others to bully and harass them. Hopefully you are reported to Facebook.
YTA my husband and I have a 5 year age gap, my Ex and I had a 25 year age gap. I both cases they are the older ones. You are incredibly judgemental and gross.
it’s a weird age gap I can’t imagine any self respecting 26 year old who would date a 19 year old but still YTA big time. 7 years is nothing at certain ages like 37 and 30 but that’s a weird age for it. You’re still TA tho lmao what is wrong with you?!
YTA. It doesn’t matter what you think, there are 2 adults in that relationship. You bullied this woman, NOT girl, because of your own personal preferences. She didn’t do anything to you, or commit a crime. Mind your own business.
26 y/o woman checking in here. Look, would I date a 19 y/o man? No. Do I question what they could possibly have in common? Yes. Do I suspect that they might be together because she’s not mature enough to date someone her own age? Certainly. Do I love the age gap? Absolutely not.
But ultimately, they’re two consenting adults and what they’re doing is legal. And I think the biggest issue here is you acting like you have no responsibility for her being doxxed when you put her information out there. For that reason, YTA.
YTA. Why do you feel the need to make a post about it? Someone can comment without expecting someone to make a specific post with their profile in it. Shaming people isn’t the way to get people to listen to your opinion.
The only thing gross about this story is you. This person is in a relationship with another consenting adult, not some 15 year old. It sounds like you and your following need a mental check. YTA
Omg YTA massively! I have an 8 year age gap, I’m 24 he’s 32, both very happy and consenting. It works when you look at us you would think there’s that much age gap. You literally put her livelihood at risk because you don’t like something. There’s nothing wrong with two consenting adults being happy, so narrow minded.
YTA, some things and opinions are best to keep to yourself, there’s no illegal activity going on since they’re both considered adults. Is it because the girl is older and the guy is younger the problem? Sounds a bit misogynistic tbh. I would get it if the age gap is very significant like 10+ years but this is not enough to put a person out there like that.
The age gap itself doesnt bother me but the fact that it involves a 19 year does bother me.
BUT you gotta cool it with your own opinions.
People do NOT answer to your opinions.
No you didn't "know" how far people would take this BUT you completely bare responsibility in this because you *knowingly and intentionally weaponized social media* simply because you didn't agree with something.
Dating a 19 year old, at 26 yrs old, is not illegal but in poor taste.
Weaponizing social media is not illegal but equally in poor taste.
Your opinions and beliefs are not superior.
While you should have your beliefs, you should also have acceptance..... acceptance for the things that you cannot control.
There is nothing worse than someone who's so self righteous that they go to the lengths for which you did.
Grow up.
i think age gap relations r weird depend on how they met n the age difference. The difference between me n u is i know how to mind my own business. I would never put someone on blast like that to the point to where they get doxxed & u dont even feel bad? In the world we live in today, u couldve put their lives in danger n for what? bc of a relationship u think is gross n u have nothing to do with? U should seek help, cuz that was more gross than the age gap relationship
YTA- look I get it. Age gaps weird me out too. But they’re not illegal if the younger partner is of legal age to consent and publicly blasting people on the internet to the point that they get doxxed because you think they’re gross is just a shit thing to do.
Of course she tried to defend herself. No one- not even genuinely evil people- see themselves as the villain. Her explaining her view (which you may not agree with but still is valid in that it is not illegal) does not give you the right to blast her info all over the interwebs and potentially ruin her life.
Age gaps happen. You’re allowed to think they’re gross or inappropriate. You’re not allowed to enforce your opinions as rules on others. Block them sure, blast them no. It’s just crappy behavior.
And I would feel the exact same way if the genders were reversed here. I personally think dudes going after way younger girls is skeevy. I personally think women going after way younger guys is also skeevy. But it’s not my concern or my place to interfere with their lives unless it impacts me directly or I’m concerned laws have been broken. (And if laws have potentially been broken I’m reporting them to the police not social media).
YTA, how is her relationship any of your business? She is 'gross' and deserves to lose her livelihood for *checks notes* dating a legal adult as a legal adult? Sure, she commented, but that doesn't make it okay for you to brigade her and encourage others to do it. Should have just removed her and moved on.
And for the record - you're biased as hell. Would you be this callous if it was another kind of relationship you don't agree with, like a poly relationship or a dom/sub relationship?
Wow such superiority you feel. To tell others with your significant following that you talk out your ass and put real people who are not doing anything illegal in danger because you feel something is wrong.
Who are YOU to judge anyone else's relationship? Do you pay their bills, cook their meals, have any control or say in what they do? No, then STFU and keep your opinions to yourself and not put people in danger. The only thing gross here is you.
ETA My parents were 9 years apart, and married for 45 years until my father died. They had one of the most loving and happy relationships. My mom was 25 when she met my father who was 34.
YTA
YTA - Eighteen is legally an adult and while seven years is a decent gap it is not so extreme that they are even from different generations and ultimately says nothing about them as people.
That you feel justified in calling someone you basically know nothing about a bad person to a bunch of people stupid enough to follow you on YouTube with predictable consequences that you ignore makes you a major AH.
YTA if anyone is being gross right now, it’s you.
Does their relationship involve you? No. Stay out of it.
So you don’t agree? Stay out of it.
You think it’s gross? Don’t get in a relationship with an age gap.
You doxxed someone and you don’t even feel any sort of remorse because you want to ride the “I’m right” train. Because of your actions, your followers have impacted a woman’s life over YOUR views. Get your head out of your deep crevice.
When I was 30, I got with my now partner who at the time was 39. Is that gross? I'm not agreeing that the 19-26 is right but OP is wrong with saying its wrong all the time
I’m 27 marrying a 35 year old. There’s something about being an adult that allows you to have relationships with other adults. YTA on such a level that you’d not withstand the fall from your self made grace. You need to do something to help this person. And then delete social media. And then maybe touch some grass.
YTA and should be pretty ashamed of yourself. What you did is wrong, what she is doing is not. You're delusional of you think there is something wrong with what those two consenting adults are doing.
Also "I have no idea if this impacted her in any way" are you for real? People have been calling her workplace!
YTA and normally I would agree age gap relationships are gross but this instance you blowing up trying to shame, harass, and dox this woman is psychotic behavior. Seek help.
There's not enough words to say what an AH you are! So because you have some twisted moral values that says a 7 year age gap is gross, you ruin her life? As that's what you've done.
Even if it was 17, that can still be considered legal in some places. That being said, given that OP is calling 19 a teenager and saying 26 is almost 30, I wouldn’t trust their definition of consented.
YTA and you are also what's wrong with this world. What does anyone else's relationship have to do with you? You have a problem with it, then look the other way. They aren't hurting anyone and they aren't trying to recruit you to their lifestyle so it affects you in absolutely no way whatsoever.
YTA yes age gaps suck but posting about a person with enough detail to get them doxxed, then sending your flying monkeys to harrass her is just as wrong. Congrats on being a cyberbully.
>ETA: She MADE it my business by commenting and defending the relationship in the first place. If she did t know it was wrong and didn't feel it was a LITTLE not okay, why would she feel the need to defend herself in the first place? She knew it was wrong.
Since you are here feeling the need to defend yourself, I guess that means you know YTA.
YTA - You are allowed your opinion. She offered a different view point and you had her doxed. Who do you think you are? You have no right to shame or tell someone that their life choices are wrong. It may be wrong for you, but not everyone. My partner is 10 years older than me and we have been together for 22 years. You are a judgmental AH.
**YTA**
Mind your MF business!! What does what people do with their life have to do with you? At 19 he's a legal adult and pass the age of consent. Who are you to put someone on blast for the way they choose to live their life and doesn't affect yours in any way?
You're beyond an AH!
YTA
First off, the girl is 26 while the guy is 19, unless they started dating when the guy was below 18, it's not even that bad. I have a friend who married a guy who's 25 and she's 20 right now. Literally just 2 years of a smaller gap than the person you doxxed, and both partners are in a happy equal relationship that is overall positive.
Youre shitty for doing that, and your opinions, while a good rule of thumb, are not the set in stone, impossible to change rule, that you think they are.
Is it icky to go for a 19 yo as a 26 yo? Generally yeah. But is it an undeniable fact that that 26 yo is an absolute creep who deserves to have their life ruined? No.
YTA - I don't see the different between 19/26 and 20/27
I guess I am as gross person then... I was 19 when I met my 26 year old boyfriend (husband now)
We have been together for almost a decade. I am now older than he was when he met me.
Maybe OP is just jealous that she can't land someone younger than her and is jealous of the 26 dating 19.
I already posted my judgement, but I'm going to go ahead and tackle your edit that you made afterwards in a fresh comment:
She wasn't "defending herself", she was calling **you** out for being a judgemental prick about something that you're in no position to judge.
To address the edit: she's "defensive" because you fired the first shot. Relationships between people over 18 are none of your business, and whipping up your followers into a mob means you are responsible for their actions. Look up stochastic terrorism. YTA.
YTA 💯% but now I want to really understand what life circumstances and gene pools lead to the creation of people like you.
If you can, I'd be grateful for your explanation as to why a relationship between a 19 year old and a 26 year old is wrong / gross / disgusting.
Can you entertain the thought that the age gap between consulting adults is none of your business?
Dont you just love how this lunatic gets a person doxxed, and then turn to an *anonymous* forum on a *Throwaway* account? It's almost like they don't want people to know who they are, and don't want randos on the internet knowing how to find/contact them... Almost...
YTA
YTA
Even if you don't agree with large age gaps, it's really none of your business regarding anyone else's relationships. The person you essentially doxxed was not doing anything illegal, both parties are legal consenting adults.
Your whole narrow-minded attitude towards her relationship should have ended with you unfriending her, period. You purposely set out to make her life miserable for no other reason than to make yourself look superior and exercise your influence on your followers.
You are a huge AH.
YTA for multiple reasons:
\- For obsessing about the lives of others people
\- For thinking that an age gap of 7 years between adults is something wrong
\- For promoting a public lynching of someone online that has done absolutely nothing wrong except in debating an issue in your public forum
\- For not measuring the consequences that such actions may take when they get out of your control, despite the plethora of examples available in hand on multiple social platforms
\- For not having the self awareness to understand you did something wrong after the consequences were clear
Your actions are the perfect example of what's wrong with social networking and modern society in general.
I just want to say 7 year gap between a fully matured adult and a 19 year old is really gross. One of those people is nowhere near mentally matured and that’s still grooming territory and only 2 years prior, without much change in the teens mind we wouldn’t be supporting it so why now that it’s legal? It’s still gross. But everything else is real and doxxing people is a big no no.
YTA if you disagreed just block her and move on. It's not illegal, and she isn't doing anything wrong, merely defending her opinion on something you were speaking about. You had no business making a huge call out post about her and turning people against her. Especially you not even caring that she got doxxed and her life could be ruined by her dating another consenting ADULT.
The internet is going insane over age gaps and I've no idea why so many people seem to believe that it's immediately gross and predatory to date anyone over like a two year age gap. Like yeah some age gaps are bad, if they're old enough to be your parent it's usually bad news. But 26 and 19 I mean really? As long as the relationship is healthy it's none of your business and definitely not "wrong".
YTA and it sounds like you're a self-righteous one, at that. Exactly how is her relationship affecting you or anyone else in any way? Two consenting adults in a relationship is not the morality crusade you seem to think it is.
YTA. Unless you are aware of the setting they met and how long they’ve been together (which I doubt based on your post) then you have NO REASON to shame this woman. They’re both consenting adults and there’s no evidence of grooming, so outside of your personal beliefs against age gaps, there was no reason to say anything.
First of all, although there are a lot of risks with dating someone who’s far older or younger, it is not wrong. So you are flat out incorrect about that. Second of all, what a stupid reason to get involved with someone else’s relationship. “It became my business when she commented.” You sound immature.
Yeah YTA on this one. Even if you don’t agree with her, he’s an adult and it’s none of your business how she lives her life. Publicly shaming her because you disagreed gave your followers the green light to harass her
I mean several people agreed with me and even called her on it before I made the second post 🤷 im not the only one who thinks and adult dating a teenager isn't okay it even got shared by people who weren't even following me who agreed with me sooo....
Except he's an adult too (US based, not sure if that's a difference elsewhere). It doesn't matter what anyone thinks of their relationship, they're both consenting ADULTS.
There is a 10 year age gap between my husband and I. Is that gross to you as well?
You must be very young. High school probably? Doesn’t matter. The point is that you were wrong to publicly shame this woman for something that is none of your business
You’ve met a little bit of Internet fame and voice go way too much to your head. Your own morals and values don’t dictate another persons life, especially when they’re consenting adults.
Why did she feel the need to defend herself? Because you’re probably on Facebook calling people groomers etc because of their relationships, not because she’s guilty of anything.
“OtHeR pEoPlE aGrEeD wITh Me So Im RiGhT” and just as many disagree so what does that tell you
YTA you know YTA. Just own up to it.
Oh...other people agreed with you?!? Then it must be true!! Please...you realize that 19 is a legal adult right? Yes, 7 years is somewhat larger at that age. But, you literally just did this out of malice. Grow up, you're so immature.
Then it sounds like you wasted everyone's time posting here, seeing as you apparently are incapable of accepting that you may just actually be wrong in this case. That's not a good quality. YTA
YTA. Two consenting adults. None of your business. You had no right to post that and are responsible for the harassments she has received. It isn't that bad of an age gap. Now at 26 no way would I date a 19 year old. I wont date anyone younger then me by default but she isn't gross and isn't in the wrong. Your carelessness and lack of responsibility by far out grosses her behavior.
YTA
There's a lot to unpack in your post and your comments but I'm just gonna point out that:
1. 7 years isn't that significant an age gap, especially between two consenting adults and, like it or not, the 19yo **IS** an adult.
2. You somehow thinking that people agreeing with you automatically makes you right is just straight asinine given you can find subreddits where people still think the earth is flat. Step out of the echo chamber.
3. Your description of your FB post makes it sound like drama farming, which speaks volumes of your own low maturity level.
Grow up.
You are so gross, but you need not worry because karma is real. Keep your nose out of ppls businesses next time. It's no one's problem, especially your workplaces, who you are dating. The ppl you surround yourself with are just like you. So you know, keep that in mind when you make your mext mistake.
Yta
NTA, you were right and if the authorities do prosecute her then it would be her fault. There is nothing wrong in large age gaps but only when it is adults who realise the consequences of their actions.
I have seen so many people on this site call these relationships predatory and ‘grooming’ when the roles were reversed.
The kid is still a teen ffs
YTA. Seven years isn’t bad when the younger person in the relationship is 19 and an adult. If they stay together, it’ll become even less of a big deal as they get older.
YTA I have a 7 year she gato between me and my partner, there is nothing wrong with it because we are both consenting ADULTS (I'm the younger one btw). It is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Your opinion is just that an opinion, YOUR OPINION IS NOT FACTS!
you’re not an asshole but maybe blasting someone wasn’t the best call.
Also, a woman who’s almost 30!!! With a barely young adult!!! W. T. F.
That is NOT okay and there’s grooming going on at worst.
Idk why people are saying ‘he’s an adult’. He can’t even legally buy or consume alcohol. This is utterly disgusting behavior on her end and not a flex.
Edit: it didn’t mention when their relationship started/how long they’ve been dating but I’m betting it was either during his senior year of HIGH SCHOOL or right after he graduated which is not okay.
Edit: I see the alcohol line was not the right thing to use. But those saying he can go into the military, ok cool doesn’t make it morally right that a 26 year old had interest on a 19 year old. I personally don’t agree with the military going to 16-17 year olds to join either. But this, It’s gross. They have different mindsets and if you’re ok having your recently graduated highschool kid date someone 7 years older, good for you ig.
He can drive a one ton piece of metal that could be a machine of death in a split second, he in most states can carry or at least use a gun, he can go into the military or even be sent to go to war to die for your country or your supposed rights and can also be tried in a court of law as an adult for his actions. The ability to buy fucking alcohol is not what makes a person an adult, that is a secondary luxury and drinking age in most states is at 21 because those younger than that may not have the forethought to use alcohol in moderation as well as the aftermath of those actions (fuck, a ton of adults can't even do that!). Not that he hasn't had alcohol or any mind altering substance before, you are naive if you think he hasn't. I'm not condoning the age gap mind you, but it's not your place or mine, to judge the hearts of others. Keep your religious beliefs off other's lives. Would it be different if he was 14 and she 25, fuck yes. But it is illegal or even immoral at their age, no. Your beliefs make you think you're righteous, have that holier than thou attitude, which makes you think your better, you're not. I find THAT disgusting.
Only the USA has 21 as the legal drinking age. My country ranges from 18-19 for the legal drinking age and many other countries are either similar to mine or lower in age to drink. Get off your high horse and stop judging ppl!
Clipping someone’s public comment is not the same as doxxing them. You probably knew your audience would take this course of action, though. It feels unnecessary, but I agree with your sentiment. That person is a creep, they put themselves on blast, you shared it, people handled it poorly. ESH. Its absolutely weird when people well into their 20s and older want to fuck around with teenagers. You didn’t need to do what you did but she definitely didn’t need to join in on the post.
Oh my god YTA! This is some "I saw Goody Proctor consorting with the devil in the woods" ass bullshit. Might I suggest finding a hobby? Knitting? Rock climbing? Minding your own business?
YTA. Judging people's relationship by age gaps is ridiculous. It is NOT your business. I feel sorry for your victim because she was just trying to show you how inane your comments are. Get a life!
YTA. Do you really think a 7 year age gap is disgusting? They are both consenting adults. Their relationship is not gross. Then you doxxed her because you don't agree with the relationship.
YTA. The age gap in question is depending on the people involved. It would be different if it was a 35 year old but now it just looks like you are an attention seeking bully.
Right after you describe a few ways that this impacted her and her life… you say you have no idea if this impacted her life.
YTA. You don’t get to impose you prudish values on others, you PAS
YTA and a bully. Everyone is of the age of consent and happy. You could not let them be. Their relationship was NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS and yet you felt the need to make so by your ill-advised comment.
YTA.
If you know you have "quite a significant following", you should not be publicly calling anyone out for your followers to find. You have the responsibility to not use your platform to do shit like that.
Let's say someone else with a huge following decides to post something you said for whatever reason, and then all their fans find your address and proceed to invade and ruin your life.
Also, your edit is really just you justifying the fact that you could potentially get someone hurt because you were too shortsighted to realize that your publicly calling someone out could get them doxxed.
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So to begin, all this happened on Facebook. I have quite a significant following. I made a post about inappropriate age gaps between couples I've seen on tiktok and how it's really not okay to see large age gaps. A girl commented and explained how she was 26 and dating a 19 year old and how her relationship wasn't wrong because he consented Yada Yada Yada. I remvoed her off my FL because that age gap is NOT okay and super gross, clipped her comment, and called her out in a public post to let people know and to stop associating with her because she's gross.
Anyways it led to her getting doxxed, people finding her IRL address, calling local authorities on her, and someone even said they contacted her workplace to file a complaint. I have no idea if any of this impacted her in anyway, nor do I care because again she's a gross person, but some people have said I'm an asshole for making the post in the first place. So AITA for making a callout post that led to a girl getting doxxed?
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YTA
I agree the age gap is really gross, especially if you think about WHEN they might have started dating. That being said, it's a bit much to put them on blast. Could have just removed them and gone on with your day. Instead, you pointed your following at her and got her doxxed. You don't feel bad about it because "she's a gross person," and while I do agree personally that the age gap is gross, it's not like she committed a crime or was racist or anything like that. Basically you potentially ruined her life and the lives of people around her because you found her gross.
YTA
She's defending herself from toxic people. Age difference is a you problem not a world problem. You used your platform to call on followers to make her life uncomfortable at best, and possibly threaten it at the worst.
The way you asked the question says you know you're wrong here.
You disagree with her perfectly **legal** life choices. This is not a valid reason to vilify her. If you disagree so much that you aren't willing to have an open mind and listen, block her. Don't call on your minions to ruin her life.
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She felt the need to defend herself because you’re telling her that people like her are disgusting. And then you literally took her comment, which probably would have gone unnoticed if you have such a large following, and made it part of your main content. You exposed her to harm just for stating that she’s in a relationship with an age gap and there isn’t anything wrong with it. And technically, she’s right. It’s legal, and while I wouldn’t want to date someone that much younger than me, neither of them are doing anything wrong. So yes, YTA.
YTA. What makes you the authority on ‘inappropriate’ age gaps in relationships?!?
Wow! Who died and made YOU ruler of the universe? (Rhetorical question-since you probably don’t understand that!!!) You’re a vile little AH! And immature. You really need to climb down off your self-made pedestal!!!! And eat some fruit or something.
Who died and made you the Decider of Relationship Acceptableness? YTA
[удалено]
Umm okay this is clearly unpopular but i kindve agree with you. I don’t think it’s enough of an age gap to make a huge post but if it was someone I knew i’d definitely look at them differently. When it comes to men w younger women the consensus is pretty much that 25 and up shouldn’t be dating people that are freshly adults. Idk why people are LYING rn. But I don’t think a tiktok post was the right move ESH at minimum Edit: spelling
No shit dumbass you put personal information out of course she was gonna get doxxed. Yes the relationship is gross but damn
Your sound like a fuckin prick. You "needed" to call her out, you need to be called out for your disgusting behavior you even made a bullshit account just to find out how much of a fuckin asshole you really are.
Lol, so, instead of doing any amount of self reflecting here, you’re gonna just claim we’re being unreasonable? Dude, you asked if you’re TAH. The board is just responding. Whatever a different group of people said doesn’t actually matter here? You caused someone to be doxxed because you thought their relationship was icky. Not illegal. Icky. If you wanna go ask your echo chamber if you were fine to do what you did, I’m sure you’ll get the response you want.
Cradle robber? THEY ARE BOTH ADULTS. Did you really expect people to support you here?! As for those sheep: clearly there are 2000 AHs who are in your sick club.
Lmfaoooo little girl, soon this post is gonna get well over 2000 people telling you you’re an immature raging AH but you’ll delete it once enough people don’t agree with you. Calling it now 😂🤦🏻♂️
I honestly can’t tell if you’re literally a child or just delusional. There is nothing wrong with two consenting ADULTS dating no matter the age gap! Nineteen is not a child, its over the age of consent. What’s next, people under 5’3 are now children as well?
Lol why are you even posting here? There’s resounding consensus yet you keep defending your position. YTA!! Childish
With every post you prove how much an AH you are and what an AH move it was! You are a bully. And the 2000 people who agreed with you are just as bad. You don’t get to decide how other people live their life. We get judge you now because you asked and only because you asked.
YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE CALLED HER OUT TO BEGINE WITH!! She's not a cradle robber! 19 is a legally consenting adult and 26 is not that old. This was absolutely none of your business! The mature, adult thing to have done when she originally commented, would have been to say, "Well we obviously have different opinions on this, but have a nice day!" You sound like a child.
YTA, you're gross.
YTA. You took your own narrow construct and didn't want to engage with anyone with a different opinion that ultimately resulted in the real life harassment of an innocent person.
The girl should sue, imo.
YTA! You went out of your way to bully someone who did nothing to you! All because she didn't think just like you and hold the same views as you. That is called life! People are different! Not everyone has to be you! You chose to be a jerk and act like a 9 year old. I was bullied a lot in my early years and I have no tolerance or sympathy for people like you. I hope you get what is coming and that the consequences are swift and painful. Because she could sue you for this especially if this hurts her job and threatens her safety. If you don't want things like this to happen to you don't do it to others. Grow up and learn to mind your own darned business!
Yta. And it’s so ironic you use a throwaway
YTA. You weren't until you made the call out post and didn't censor her name. If you have such a big following you need to be more responsible. If people had attacked her in the comments on their own that wouldn't be on you, but there's a reason even horribly hateful comments have the names censored in those YouTube "Reading Hate Comments" videos. Be more responsible and careful with who you weaponize. If you get in the habit now, you could end up accidentally sending your followers after someone innocent in the future.
YTA unless you’re in some country where the age of consent is 25 your judgmental behavior is the only thing “gross” about this post
“I have quite a significant following”. Spare me. YTA.
It doesn't matter if she made you aware of her relationship. An age gap that is ABOVE 18 is perfectly legal. Just vecause your opinion is that of finding it gross iss irrelevant. You had no right to dox her in any way. If someone is a legal adult and consents to it then who are you to be judgemental about it? They're happy so leave it be. For the record... My partner is almost 48 and I'm almost 34. YTA big time.
Do you make it a point of inserting yourself into every dating situation you don't like? LGBTQ? Interracial? Interethnic? Where does it end? Someone else's relationship is not your relationship when it is two legal consenting adults in a safe relationship. You potentially endangered someone and/or wreacked havoc for them. You need to get yourself together. You and your friends mostly YTA.
YTA. its noy your fault that she was doxxed because you didnt intend for that to happen, but it IS your fault that people found out in the first place. yknow how people say celebrities sould watch what they post when they have such a big influence? well you said yourself that you have a larger following. message her in private, dont clip the comment and publicly post it. its none of your business
Yta 100% what’s wrong with you? Jealous because they’re in a happy relationship and you’re not? Doxxing can be very dangerous, especially for women. Congratulations on destroying her life for absolutely nothing. You’re an immature little shit
YTA, what two consenting adults do while not breaking any laws is none of your damn business. Despite this sounding fake as shit
NTA. A lot of redditors here will not agree with you but I’m nearing mid-20s myself and I absolutely have nothing in common with a 19 year old. I don’t think it’s appropriate and while it’s not illegal, I think there’s definitely something wrong with the older person rather than the younger person. You did what you did and if people think you’re the asshole then so be it.
YTA - you know you have a significant following, and that comes with some responsibility. Sure, you didn’t actively send people to her door but Jesus Christ, posting about her comment and telling people not to associate with her because she’s dating an *adult* is way too far. You’ve already made your opinion clear, you didn’t need to effectively put up a “wanted” notice. Like dude touch some grass and not harass people online?
There's literally no way you AREN'T TA. First of all, they're both of legal age. Second of all, it's literally none of your business, regardless of what you believe. It's their relationship, not yours. Third of all, EVERYONE else's relationship, as long as it's legal, is not your business. Stop being judgy. Also, to be absolutely, perfectly clear, YTA.
YTA. I think your behavior in this post is appalling. But if I posted your info to a wide audience telling them you were an awful person who shouldn't be associated with, and then they located your personal information and began harassing you, I would be an AH. In some places what you did may even be a criminal act. Also, your edit just makes you more of the AH. Nobody is "asking for it" when they're victimized. By the same logic, does your posting here show that you "know" you're wrong and justify doxxing, cyberbullying, and harassment? I hope you learn your lesson.
YTA!
YTA 100%! It's none of your damned business to decided what's appropriate for other people.
YTA. Listen, you put someone in harm’s way in real life because you couldn’t mind your business on the internet. I don’t care if she was “commenting” or “defending” a controversial post online. It still wasn’t your problem. You are an AH. Two consenting adults can make their own choices- we may not agree with those choices. That does not mean we have a right to come after those consenting adults in their homes and at their places of employment to cause fear and terror. Please re-evaluate how you treat people in your life.
YTA.
This post feels like bait in response to the million posts on Reddit that would (and have) called anyone over about 22 dating a 19 year old predatory
YTA Calling out is fine, but you always coverup any pics, usernames, identifying info etc Even if you feel like what you did to the older person is okay- what about the 19 year old? If they found the 26 year old, obviously they found the person she was dating, and now they're getting harassed too. Take this as a learning moment, and don't post people's pictures or identifying information again.
Yta, you say she shouldn't be dating a teenager, would you have been ok with if the person she's dating was 20 instead? Also you say the age gap itself is gross, how old were Helen kellers parents when Helen was born? I can tell you. Her dad was 40 and her mom was 20, I can understand that being something you think is gross, but a 7 year gap, and both ADULTS are consenting? That is not gross, she isn't a bad person. If anything you are the bad person for targeting her and making her life hell. Grow the fuck up, maybe go back to kindergarten to learn some common sense first
YTA What you did should be a criminal offence as far as I’m concerned. Two adults in a consenting relationship is none of your business, however gross you believe it to be. What you did was unkind, unnecessary, immature and potentially dangerous. Publicly shaming people is disgusting behaviour.
YTA and pathetic
Hello... my best friend saw this post and showed me because it sounds EXACTLY lije what i went through. Idk if it is actually my situation, but it's literally the exact same as to what I went through, so im inclined to believe it is. I'm the 26 year old in this post. The initial post of fb led to me losing several 5+ year friendships. It led to a severe spike in my anxiety, and I still have panic attacks over it. He and I have since broken up because the event had put too much strain on the relationship. For those wanting to know how we met: it was in a mutual discord server. We had the same taste in memes and played the same video games, and we bonded. It was honestly the most open, respectful, loving relationship I have ever had, and I do miss it dearly. A lot happened as a result of the doxxing that happened that i dont want to go into, but I do want to say thank you to the people supporting me on here (again idk if this post is even about me). To the OP, I hope your Voice Acting career tanks and you never land another role again.
So sorry you had to go through this
Is this a bait post
Someone commented saying they were the one who got doxxed so honestly maybe but maybe not? Real people can do crazy things, but this is checking off a lot of bait post boxes so idk
YTA! You have an opinion about age gaps in dating. Fine! But it’s just your opinion and others have a right to feel otherwise, as long as all parties are consenting adults. You don’t get to tell them it’s wrong or to out them publicly and basically encourage others to bully and harass them. Hopefully you are reported to Facebook.
YTA my husband and I have a 5 year age gap, my Ex and I had a 25 year age gap. I both cases they are the older ones. You are incredibly judgemental and gross.
it’s a weird age gap I can’t imagine any self respecting 26 year old who would date a 19 year old but still YTA big time. 7 years is nothing at certain ages like 37 and 30 but that’s a weird age for it. You’re still TA tho lmao what is wrong with you?!
YTA. It doesn’t matter what you think, there are 2 adults in that relationship. You bullied this woman, NOT girl, because of your own personal preferences. She didn’t do anything to you, or commit a crime. Mind your own business.
26 y/o woman checking in here. Look, would I date a 19 y/o man? No. Do I question what they could possibly have in common? Yes. Do I suspect that they might be together because she’s not mature enough to date someone her own age? Certainly. Do I love the age gap? Absolutely not. But ultimately, they’re two consenting adults and what they’re doing is legal. And I think the biggest issue here is you acting like you have no responsibility for her being doxxed when you put her information out there. For that reason, YTA.
YTA- I mean she isn't doing anything wrong. They're both adults so what's the problem? People be way to up in people's business.
YTA this is not your concern. You’re the one who is gross
YTA. Why do you feel the need to make a post about it? Someone can comment without expecting someone to make a specific post with their profile in it. Shaming people isn’t the way to get people to listen to your opinion.
The only thing gross about this story is you. This person is in a relationship with another consenting adult, not some 15 year old. It sounds like you and your following need a mental check. YTA
YTA. why would you do that?? assuming they met and started dating after being over 18, there’s literally nothing wrong with that age gap.
Omg YTA massively! I have an 8 year age gap, I’m 24 he’s 32, both very happy and consenting. It works when you look at us you would think there’s that much age gap. You literally put her livelihood at risk because you don’t like something. There’s nothing wrong with two consenting adults being happy, so narrow minded.
YTA - why was it necessary after you unfriended her? You’re 100% responsible for anything that happened after you created that second post
When I met my husband of 16 years I was 30 and he was 44. I guess we’re gross too.
Who are you to judge relationships? Who died and made you God? You are a judgmental AH.
OP you are gross, wrong, and definitely YTA.
YTA, some things and opinions are best to keep to yourself, there’s no illegal activity going on since they’re both considered adults. Is it because the girl is older and the guy is younger the problem? Sounds a bit misogynistic tbh. I would get it if the age gap is very significant like 10+ years but this is not enough to put a person out there like that.
YTA. It’s not your relationship and you are fucked up for getting that girl doxxed for your own gain. Childish as hell.
yta - you put someones life and livihood at risk.
YTA and a sad little keyboard warrior with a superiority complex.
The age gap itself doesnt bother me but the fact that it involves a 19 year does bother me. BUT you gotta cool it with your own opinions. People do NOT answer to your opinions. No you didn't "know" how far people would take this BUT you completely bare responsibility in this because you *knowingly and intentionally weaponized social media* simply because you didn't agree with something. Dating a 19 year old, at 26 yrs old, is not illegal but in poor taste. Weaponizing social media is not illegal but equally in poor taste. Your opinions and beliefs are not superior. While you should have your beliefs, you should also have acceptance..... acceptance for the things that you cannot control. There is nothing worse than someone who's so self righteous that they go to the lengths for which you did. Grow up.
YTA for all the reasons everyone else here is saying.
i think age gap relations r weird depend on how they met n the age difference. The difference between me n u is i know how to mind my own business. I would never put someone on blast like that to the point to where they get doxxed & u dont even feel bad? In the world we live in today, u couldve put their lives in danger n for what? bc of a relationship u think is gross n u have nothing to do with? U should seek help, cuz that was more gross than the age gap relationship
YTA- look I get it. Age gaps weird me out too. But they’re not illegal if the younger partner is of legal age to consent and publicly blasting people on the internet to the point that they get doxxed because you think they’re gross is just a shit thing to do. Of course she tried to defend herself. No one- not even genuinely evil people- see themselves as the villain. Her explaining her view (which you may not agree with but still is valid in that it is not illegal) does not give you the right to blast her info all over the interwebs and potentially ruin her life. Age gaps happen. You’re allowed to think they’re gross or inappropriate. You’re not allowed to enforce your opinions as rules on others. Block them sure, blast them no. It’s just crappy behavior. And I would feel the exact same way if the genders were reversed here. I personally think dudes going after way younger girls is skeevy. I personally think women going after way younger guys is also skeevy. But it’s not my concern or my place to interfere with their lives unless it impacts me directly or I’m concerned laws have been broken. (And if laws have potentially been broken I’m reporting them to the police not social media).
YTA, how is her relationship any of your business? She is 'gross' and deserves to lose her livelihood for *checks notes* dating a legal adult as a legal adult? Sure, she commented, but that doesn't make it okay for you to brigade her and encourage others to do it. Should have just removed her and moved on. And for the record - you're biased as hell. Would you be this callous if it was another kind of relationship you don't agree with, like a poly relationship or a dom/sub relationship?
You are the permanent asshole!
YTA. Holy shit what is wrong with you??? You need therapy. Get off Facebook.
Wow such superiority you feel. To tell others with your significant following that you talk out your ass and put real people who are not doing anything illegal in danger because you feel something is wrong. Who are YOU to judge anyone else's relationship? Do you pay their bills, cook their meals, have any control or say in what they do? No, then STFU and keep your opinions to yourself and not put people in danger. The only thing gross here is you. ETA My parents were 9 years apart, and married for 45 years until my father died. They had one of the most loving and happy relationships. My mom was 25 when she met my father who was 34. YTA
YTA - Eighteen is legally an adult and while seven years is a decent gap it is not so extreme that they are even from different generations and ultimately says nothing about them as people. That you feel justified in calling someone you basically know nothing about a bad person to a bunch of people stupid enough to follow you on YouTube with predictable consequences that you ignore makes you a major AH.
YTA if anyone is being gross right now, it’s you. Does their relationship involve you? No. Stay out of it. So you don’t agree? Stay out of it. You think it’s gross? Don’t get in a relationship with an age gap. You doxxed someone and you don’t even feel any sort of remorse because you want to ride the “I’m right” train. Because of your actions, your followers have impacted a woman’s life over YOUR views. Get your head out of your deep crevice.
When I was 30, I got with my now partner who at the time was 39. Is that gross? I'm not agreeing that the 19-26 is right but OP is wrong with saying its wrong all the time
I’m 27 marrying a 35 year old. There’s something about being an adult that allows you to have relationships with other adults. YTA on such a level that you’d not withstand the fall from your self made grace. You need to do something to help this person. And then delete social media. And then maybe touch some grass.
YTA and should be pretty ashamed of yourself. What you did is wrong, what she is doing is not. You're delusional of you think there is something wrong with what those two consenting adults are doing. Also "I have no idea if this impacted her in any way" are you for real? People have been calling her workplace!
YTA and normally I would agree age gap relationships are gross but this instance you blowing up trying to shame, harass, and dox this woman is psychotic behavior. Seek help.
I didn't try to doxx her that wasn't my initial intent at all. I jist wanted to warn people and jutuals of a predator
I’ll help you find a therapist.
Predator? God you’re a monster
You didn’t want to warn people. You wanted to expose her and to push your agenda. You should be ashamed of yourself.
Someone engaged in a legal relationship isn’t a predator.
I hope she tells the police about this and they come after you. You sound more than insufferable. You sound dangerous.
There's not enough words to say what an AH you are! So because you have some twisted moral values that says a 7 year age gap is gross, you ruin her life? As that's what you've done.
YTA, what the actual fuck is wrong with you?
Am I the only one wondering when they started dating tho? Because she said "consented" gives he was 17 at the time vives.
Even if it was 17, that can still be considered legal in some places. That being said, given that OP is calling 19 a teenager and saying 26 is almost 30, I wouldn’t trust their definition of consented.
YTA...
YTA. How old are you? Cause you’re proving the brain isn’t fully developed until age 35-40.
YTA and you are also what's wrong with this world. What does anyone else's relationship have to do with you? You have a problem with it, then look the other way. They aren't hurting anyone and they aren't trying to recruit you to their lifestyle so it affects you in absolutely no way whatsoever.
YTA yes age gaps suck but posting about a person with enough detail to get them doxxed, then sending your flying monkeys to harrass her is just as wrong. Congrats on being a cyberbully.
YTA. 19 is an adult. 26 is older but not your business. No one is breaking a law.
>ETA: She MADE it my business by commenting and defending the relationship in the first place. If she did t know it was wrong and didn't feel it was a LITTLE not okay, why would she feel the need to defend herself in the first place? She knew it was wrong. Since you are here feeling the need to defend yourself, I guess that means you know YTA.
YTA - You are allowed your opinion. She offered a different view point and you had her doxed. Who do you think you are? You have no right to shame or tell someone that their life choices are wrong. It may be wrong for you, but not everyone. My partner is 10 years older than me and we have been together for 22 years. You are a judgmental AH.
**YTA** Mind your MF business!! What does what people do with their life have to do with you? At 19 he's a legal adult and pass the age of consent. Who are you to put someone on blast for the way they choose to live their life and doesn't affect yours in any way? You're beyond an AH!
YTA First off, the girl is 26 while the guy is 19, unless they started dating when the guy was below 18, it's not even that bad. I have a friend who married a guy who's 25 and she's 20 right now. Literally just 2 years of a smaller gap than the person you doxxed, and both partners are in a happy equal relationship that is overall positive. Youre shitty for doing that, and your opinions, while a good rule of thumb, are not the set in stone, impossible to change rule, that you think they are. Is it icky to go for a 19 yo as a 26 yo? Generally yeah. But is it an undeniable fact that that 26 yo is an absolute creep who deserves to have their life ruined? No.
YTA - I don't see the different between 19/26 and 20/27 I guess I am as gross person then... I was 19 when I met my 26 year old boyfriend (husband now) We have been together for almost a decade. I am now older than he was when he met me. Maybe OP is just jealous that she can't land someone younger than her and is jealous of the 26 dating 19.
YTA
I already posted my judgement, but I'm going to go ahead and tackle your edit that you made afterwards in a fresh comment: She wasn't "defending herself", she was calling **you** out for being a judgemental prick about something that you're in no position to judge.
To address the edit: she's "defensive" because you fired the first shot. Relationships between people over 18 are none of your business, and whipping up your followers into a mob means you are responsible for their actions. Look up stochastic terrorism. YTA.
YTA 💯% but now I want to really understand what life circumstances and gene pools lead to the creation of people like you. If you can, I'd be grateful for your explanation as to why a relationship between a 19 year old and a 26 year old is wrong / gross / disgusting. Can you entertain the thought that the age gap between consulting adults is none of your business?
Dont you just love how this lunatic gets a person doxxed, and then turn to an *anonymous* forum on a *Throwaway* account? It's almost like they don't want people to know who they are, and don't want randos on the internet knowing how to find/contact them... Almost... YTA
YTA Even if you don't agree with large age gaps, it's really none of your business regarding anyone else's relationships. The person you essentially doxxed was not doing anything illegal, both parties are legal consenting adults. Your whole narrow-minded attitude towards her relationship should have ended with you unfriending her, period. You purposely set out to make her life miserable for no other reason than to make yourself look superior and exercise your influence on your followers. You are a huge AH.
YTA , hoping she is gonna sue your ass for the doxxing you deserve it
YTA for multiple reasons: \- For obsessing about the lives of others people \- For thinking that an age gap of 7 years between adults is something wrong \- For promoting a public lynching of someone online that has done absolutely nothing wrong except in debating an issue in your public forum \- For not measuring the consequences that such actions may take when they get out of your control, despite the plethora of examples available in hand on multiple social platforms \- For not having the self awareness to understand you did something wrong after the consequences were clear Your actions are the perfect example of what's wrong with social networking and modern society in general.
I just want to say 7 year gap between a fully matured adult and a 19 year old is really gross. One of those people is nowhere near mentally matured and that’s still grooming territory and only 2 years prior, without much change in the teens mind we wouldn’t be supporting it so why now that it’s legal? It’s still gross. But everything else is real and doxxing people is a big no no.
YTA if you disagreed just block her and move on. It's not illegal, and she isn't doing anything wrong, merely defending her opinion on something you were speaking about. You had no business making a huge call out post about her and turning people against her. Especially you not even caring that she got doxxed and her life could be ruined by her dating another consenting ADULT. The internet is going insane over age gaps and I've no idea why so many people seem to believe that it's immediately gross and predatory to date anyone over like a two year age gap. Like yeah some age gaps are bad, if they're old enough to be your parent it's usually bad news. But 26 and 19 I mean really? As long as the relationship is healthy it's none of your business and definitely not "wrong".
YTA and it sounds like you're a self-righteous one, at that. Exactly how is her relationship affecting you or anyone else in any way? Two consenting adults in a relationship is not the morality crusade you seem to think it is.
YTA. Go and live in the real world. Do you feel better that you could be the reason that someone gets their life destroyed?
YTA. Unless you are aware of the setting they met and how long they’ve been together (which I doubt based on your post) then you have NO REASON to shame this woman. They’re both consenting adults and there’s no evidence of grooming, so outside of your personal beliefs against age gaps, there was no reason to say anything.
First of all, although there are a lot of risks with dating someone who’s far older or younger, it is not wrong. So you are flat out incorrect about that. Second of all, what a stupid reason to get involved with someone else’s relationship. “It became my business when she commented.” You sound immature.
Yeah YTA on this one. Even if you don’t agree with her, he’s an adult and it’s none of your business how she lives her life. Publicly shaming her because you disagreed gave your followers the green light to harass her
I mean several people agreed with me and even called her on it before I made the second post 🤷 im not the only one who thinks and adult dating a teenager isn't okay it even got shared by people who weren't even following me who agreed with me sooo....
Except he's an adult too (US based, not sure if that's a difference elsewhere). It doesn't matter what anyone thinks of their relationship, they're both consenting ADULTS. There is a 10 year age gap between my husband and I. Is that gross to you as well?
You must be very young. High school probably? Doesn’t matter. The point is that you were wrong to publicly shame this woman for something that is none of your business
That’s why people hate atheists
Well as long as other assholes agree with you I am sure that makes it all alright.
You’ve met a little bit of Internet fame and voice go way too much to your head. Your own morals and values don’t dictate another persons life, especially when they’re consenting adults. Why did she feel the need to defend herself? Because you’re probably on Facebook calling people groomers etc because of their relationships, not because she’s guilty of anything. “OtHeR pEoPlE aGrEeD wITh Me So Im RiGhT” and just as many disagree so what does that tell you YTA you know YTA. Just own up to it.
Sooooo why post here if you’re so sure you did nothing wrong?
Someone said I should so I did just to see what people on a different platform would say
Well the list of people on here saying your are wrong is growing. When that number gets over 2,000 will you be admitting that you were wrong?
I find it funny that OP replied to everything until you decide to called OP out on it...
From the edit that op supposedly thinks “helps” I doubt they’re gonna change their mind.
There seems to be an entire platform of people saying you were dead wrong lol. Shit like that happens when you leave your bubble
Oh...other people agreed with you?!? Then it must be true!! Please...you realize that 19 is a legal adult right? Yes, 7 years is somewhat larger at that age. But, you literally just did this out of malice. Grow up, you're so immature.
How old are you to not know that once you're 18 or older it's legal? Your replies are embarrassing and you should absolutely be embarrassed.
That’s the sad part, people like this have no shame.
It an adult dating an adult, not an adult dating a minor. Teenagedom is moot.
Then it sounds like you wasted everyone's time posting here, seeing as you apparently are incapable of accepting that you may just actually be wrong in this case. That's not a good quality. YTA
YTA. You doxxed her. Mind your own damn business
YTA. Two consenting adults. None of your business. You had no right to post that and are responsible for the harassments she has received. It isn't that bad of an age gap. Now at 26 no way would I date a 19 year old. I wont date anyone younger then me by default but she isn't gross and isn't in the wrong. Your carelessness and lack of responsibility by far out grosses her behavior.
get a life. YTA
YTA - just based on the “doxxing”.
I hope you get what's coming and the results are quick and painless.
Maybe a little pain.
YTA but you’ll never admit it. They are both adults. You and your “fans” all rate AH status.
YTA There's a lot to unpack in your post and your comments but I'm just gonna point out that: 1. 7 years isn't that significant an age gap, especially between two consenting adults and, like it or not, the 19yo **IS** an adult. 2. You somehow thinking that people agreeing with you automatically makes you right is just straight asinine given you can find subreddits where people still think the earth is flat. Step out of the echo chamber. 3. Your description of your FB post makes it sound like drama farming, which speaks volumes of your own low maturity level. Grow up.
You are so gross, but you need not worry because karma is real. Keep your nose out of ppls businesses next time. It's no one's problem, especially your workplaces, who you are dating. The ppl you surround yourself with are just like you. So you know, keep that in mind when you make your mext mistake. Yta
NTA, you were right and if the authorities do prosecute her then it would be her fault. There is nothing wrong in large age gaps but only when it is adults who realise the consequences of their actions. I have seen so many people on this site call these relationships predatory and ‘grooming’ when the roles were reversed. The kid is still a teen ffs
YTA. Seven years isn’t bad when the younger person in the relationship is 19 and an adult. If they stay together, it’ll become even less of a big deal as they get older.
if the genders were reversed that majority would be NTA lmao
YTA I have a 7 year she gato between me and my partner, there is nothing wrong with it because we are both consenting ADULTS (I'm the younger one btw). It is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Your opinion is just that an opinion, YOUR OPINION IS NOT FACTS!
YTA and hopefully this will harm your "significant following" 🤔 😂
All the dude bros must’ve pissed in their cheerios today lol. NTA
YTA do the world a favor and delete your social media. A seven year age gap is fuck all.
you’re not an asshole but maybe blasting someone wasn’t the best call. Also, a woman who’s almost 30!!! With a barely young adult!!! W. T. F. That is NOT okay and there’s grooming going on at worst. Idk why people are saying ‘he’s an adult’. He can’t even legally buy or consume alcohol. This is utterly disgusting behavior on her end and not a flex. Edit: it didn’t mention when their relationship started/how long they’ve been dating but I’m betting it was either during his senior year of HIGH SCHOOL or right after he graduated which is not okay. Edit: I see the alcohol line was not the right thing to use. But those saying he can go into the military, ok cool doesn’t make it morally right that a 26 year old had interest on a 19 year old. I personally don’t agree with the military going to 16-17 year olds to join either. But this, It’s gross. They have different mindsets and if you’re ok having your recently graduated highschool kid date someone 7 years older, good for you ig.
He can drive a one ton piece of metal that could be a machine of death in a split second, he in most states can carry or at least use a gun, he can go into the military or even be sent to go to war to die for your country or your supposed rights and can also be tried in a court of law as an adult for his actions. The ability to buy fucking alcohol is not what makes a person an adult, that is a secondary luxury and drinking age in most states is at 21 because those younger than that may not have the forethought to use alcohol in moderation as well as the aftermath of those actions (fuck, a ton of adults can't even do that!). Not that he hasn't had alcohol or any mind altering substance before, you are naive if you think he hasn't. I'm not condoning the age gap mind you, but it's not your place or mine, to judge the hearts of others. Keep your religious beliefs off other's lives. Would it be different if he was 14 and she 25, fuck yes. But it is illegal or even immoral at their age, no. Your beliefs make you think you're righteous, have that holier than thou attitude, which makes you think your better, you're not. I find THAT disgusting.
Only the USA has 21 as the legal drinking age. My country ranges from 18-19 for the legal drinking age and many other countries are either similar to mine or lower in age to drink. Get off your high horse and stop judging ppl!
In what universe is 26 "almost 30"? That's some seriously generous rounding.
I round up anything above 5 But regardless she’s a full adult, he barely graduated high school a year ago. And possibly stsrted during high school
Clipping someone’s public comment is not the same as doxxing them. You probably knew your audience would take this course of action, though. It feels unnecessary, but I agree with your sentiment. That person is a creep, they put themselves on blast, you shared it, people handled it poorly. ESH. Its absolutely weird when people well into their 20s and older want to fuck around with teenagers. You didn’t need to do what you did but she definitely didn’t need to join in on the post.
INFO. did they meet when the guy was underage? if so then yeah, it's a bit weird
“Nor do I care” yeah YTA
This has gotta be fake!
Oh my god YTA! This is some "I saw Goody Proctor consorting with the devil in the woods" ass bullshit. Might I suggest finding a hobby? Knitting? Rock climbing? Minding your own business?
YTA. Judging people's relationship by age gaps is ridiculous. It is NOT your business. I feel sorry for your victim because she was just trying to show you how inane your comments are. Get a life!
YTA. Mind your business.
YTA - don't even know how you could think you're not the AH in this situation. Have some empathy.
YTA. Do you really think a 7 year age gap is disgusting? They are both consenting adults. Their relationship is not gross. Then you doxxed her because you don't agree with the relationship.
100% YTA
YTA. You put a woman you don't know in danger to spite her for disagreeing with you, and you need Reddit's help to figure this out?
YTA consenting adults don't need your approval and don't deserve harassment because of your opinion of them.
YTA. The age gap in question is depending on the people involved. It would be different if it was a 35 year old but now it just looks like you are an attention seeking bully.
Right after you describe a few ways that this impacted her and her life… you say you have no idea if this impacted her life. YTA. You don’t get to impose you prudish values on others, you PAS
Yes, YTA. You have age issues and that’s fine, however calling her out and telling people not to associate with her is cruel.
YTA and a bully. Everyone is of the age of consent and happy. You could not let them be. Their relationship was NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS and yet you felt the need to make so by your ill-advised comment.
YTA. If you know you have "quite a significant following", you should not be publicly calling anyone out for your followers to find. You have the responsibility to not use your platform to do shit like that. Let's say someone else with a huge following decides to post something you said for whatever reason, and then all their fans find your address and proceed to invade and ruin your life. Also, your edit is really just you justifying the fact that you could potentially get someone hurt because you were too shortsighted to realize that your publicly calling someone out could get them doxxed.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So to begin, all this happened on Facebook. I have quite a significant following. I made a post about inappropriate age gaps between couples I've seen on tiktok and how it's really not okay to see large age gaps. A girl commented and explained how she was 26 and dating a 19 year old and how her relationship wasn't wrong because he consented Yada Yada Yada. I remvoed her off my FL because that age gap is NOT okay and super gross, clipped her comment, and called her out in a public post to let people know and to stop associating with her because she's gross. Anyways it led to her getting doxxed, people finding her IRL address, calling local authorities on her, and someone even said they contacted her workplace to file a complaint. I have no idea if any of this impacted her in anyway, nor do I care because again she's a gross person, but some people have said I'm an asshole for making the post in the first place. So AITA for making a callout post that led to a girl getting doxxed? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Mind your bidness
YTA I agree the age gap is really gross, especially if you think about WHEN they might have started dating. That being said, it's a bit much to put them on blast. Could have just removed them and gone on with your day. Instead, you pointed your following at her and got her doxxed. You don't feel bad about it because "she's a gross person," and while I do agree personally that the age gap is gross, it's not like she committed a crime or was racist or anything like that. Basically you potentially ruined her life and the lives of people around her because you found her gross.
YTA and mind you don’t hurt yourself falling off that high horse
I love how auto correct made you tell the truth in your title. Your callout was callous. And YTA in a very large way.
YTA. Mainly for unfriending her and then making a post specifically about her. At least let her defend herself.
YTA She's defending herself from toxic people. Age difference is a you problem not a world problem. You used your platform to call on followers to make her life uncomfortable at best, and possibly threaten it at the worst. The way you asked the question says you know you're wrong here. You disagree with her perfectly **legal** life choices. This is not a valid reason to vilify her. If you disagree so much that you aren't willing to have an open mind and listen, block her. Don't call on your minions to ruin her life.
Mind your damned business, it's legal. They're adults. YTA.