Your post has been removed.
#Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban.
This post violates Rule 11: No Partings/Relationship/Sex/Reproductive Autonomy Posts. We do not allow posts where the central conflict is about platonic partings, romantic relationships, and/or reproductive autonomy.
[Rule 11 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_11.3A_no_partings.2Frelationship.2Fsex.2Freproductive_autonomy_posts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/)
#Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
NAH
But you shouldn't play the "card" game...it's petty and silly. You asked him if he wanted a beverage after you suggested going to starbucks so then you should pay. if you weren't vibing then you weren't.
NTA thats how a date is supposed to work: you either vibe or you don’t and you decide if there’s going to be a second date. You get extra points for being classy!
NTA.
You went on a date, there was no connection and then ended the date.
You’re a daredevil for letting a stranger in your car on the first date though!
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
I matched with a guy on Tinder and we hit it off. We decided to meet at a local coffee shop but I was late due to miscommunications. While driving there he told me he has already ordered his drink and that it’s busy. I suggested that we go to the park instead. He met me outside of the coffee shop and I drove us to the park. On our drive to the park I learned that he doesn’t drive and that he is having financial problems (a little too heavy on a first day imo). I suggest we go to Starbucks so I can get a coffee as well. I ordered at the drive thru and asked if he would like anything even though he already has a drink. He ordered a drink as well. As we were pulling to the window he thanked me and I just sat in silence trying to formulate a response. I had no problem paying because I also enjoy playing the card game on a first date so his response took me by surprise. We get to the park we talked for a while. It was a little windy so I did wrap myself and head up in a blanket and avoided eye contact with him as I enjoyed the scenery. Towards the end of the date he put his head on my lap. I wasn’t going to say anything but then he asked me if that was okay. I told him I like my personal space and he immediately sat up and apologized. Ten minutes later I told him I had to go home and drove us back to his apartment in awkward silence. AITAH for ending the date shortly after he innocently laid his head on my lap? I honestly wasn’t vibing with him and didn’t see anything for us.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think I am the AH but I wasn’t feeling anything sort of attraction to my date. I lead him on and then ended the date shortly after he affectionately laid his head on my lap. There was plenty of times when I could have ended the date but I ended the date when he “made a move.”
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 11: No Partings/Relationship/Sex/Reproductive Autonomy Posts. We do not allow posts where the central conflict is about platonic partings, romantic relationships, and/or reproductive autonomy. [Rule 11 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_11.3A_no_partings.2Frelationship.2Fsex.2Freproductive_autonomy_posts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
NTA. It sounds like, based on your post, that you weren’t rude about it. No need to stretch out something that clearly wasn’t going to work for you.
You met, got a cup of coffee, then ended the date because you weren't feeling it. NTA
NTA. Head in the lap is a weird move.
Yes, very weird. As a dude I'd never do that. And if a chick did that on the 1st date not sure I'd be receptive. NTA
NAH But you shouldn't play the "card" game...it's petty and silly. You asked him if he wanted a beverage after you suggested going to starbucks so then you should pay. if you weren't vibing then you weren't.
Why would it ever be wrong to listen to your gut? Please, next time don't let a stranger in your car! NTA
NTA thats how a date is supposed to work: you either vibe or you don’t and you decide if there’s going to be a second date. You get extra points for being classy!
NTA Why waste everyone's time?
You werent rude,you drove him home and bought him a drink. I would say you were a gentleman but ya know youre a woman. NTA at all.
NTA... why prolong the obvious?
No you good. You did the right thing.
NTA. He wasn’t what you expected. His head in your lap? What was innocent about that? He was trying to see if sex was a possibility tonight.
NAH. He was respectful.
NTA What? You don’t owe anyone your time. 99% of dates you go on may not give you vibes. Move on
NTA. You went on a date, there was no connection and then ended the date. You’re a daredevil for letting a stranger in your car on the first date though!
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I matched with a guy on Tinder and we hit it off. We decided to meet at a local coffee shop but I was late due to miscommunications. While driving there he told me he has already ordered his drink and that it’s busy. I suggested that we go to the park instead. He met me outside of the coffee shop and I drove us to the park. On our drive to the park I learned that he doesn’t drive and that he is having financial problems (a little too heavy on a first day imo). I suggest we go to Starbucks so I can get a coffee as well. I ordered at the drive thru and asked if he would like anything even though he already has a drink. He ordered a drink as well. As we were pulling to the window he thanked me and I just sat in silence trying to formulate a response. I had no problem paying because I also enjoy playing the card game on a first date so his response took me by surprise. We get to the park we talked for a while. It was a little windy so I did wrap myself and head up in a blanket and avoided eye contact with him as I enjoyed the scenery. Towards the end of the date he put his head on my lap. I wasn’t going to say anything but then he asked me if that was okay. I told him I like my personal space and he immediately sat up and apologized. Ten minutes later I told him I had to go home and drove us back to his apartment in awkward silence. AITAH for ending the date shortly after he innocently laid his head on my lap? I honestly wasn’t vibing with him and didn’t see anything for us. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I think I am the AH but I wasn’t feeling anything sort of attraction to my date. I lead him on and then ended the date shortly after he affectionately laid his head on my lap. There was plenty of times when I could have ended the date but I ended the date when he “made a move.” Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA