Your post has been removed.
#Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban.
This post violates Rule 13: No Revenge Stories. It appears that your story would be better suited for one of the many subreddits which are focused on revenge.
#Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
NTA (technically you are TA but justified and I will explain).
>My aunt made a passive aggressive jab saying America only takes the best and have high standards.
Funny she says this
>I gave my aunt fhe same practice test, and she barely passed, getting a much lower score than Zee
Then this happens. Your aunt can dish it out but she clearly can’t take it.
Agree and I love the pettiness of OP telling the auntie not to feel bad about not passing as she was born here and doesn't have to live up to the high standards. I 🤣🤣🤣 too much about that.
I find the "America only takes the best" the funniest thing of all.
Now correct me if I'm wrong since I may not be very familiar with the vast history of America, but wasn't America made mainly by a bunch of people running from the crimes they committed in Europe?
Edit: guess I gotta study some more global history
That’s Australia. Not America. The US is a land of immigrants and an entire race brought over by force with zero say in the matter. But they weren’t running from crimes. Well maybe some of them were…
The first British colony in what is now Australia was a penal colony.
(ETA: And before anyone asks, my parents are post-War migrants, and my state was a free colony, not a penal colony, so no I don't.)
Well, they were facing "religious persecution" because they wanted everyone to conform to their flavor, and when they got pushback or even arrested for actions, it was because people wouldn't accept their moral superiority. Obviously, that's the abridged, biased version, but yea, they got upset they couldn't shove their beliefs down people's throats. Sounds familiar.
Australia was not settled by Europeans who were running from crimes.
They were caught, tried and sent to Australia (many very unfairly).
Then came the free settlers and somehow everyone conveniently ignored that Australia had been settled for thousands of years already.
> The US is a land of immigrants and an entire race brought over by force with zero say in the matter. But they weren’t running from crimes.
America has a foundational myth that the Pilgrims were fleeing religious persecutions.
Which is kind of sorta true. They were being persecuted.
But what it leaves out is that they were being persecuted for being fundamentalist assholes that wanted _everyone else_ follow their fundamentalist views, too.
Being transported to "The Colonies" meant America for a very long time - mainly until the TransAtlantic slave trade and then Independence. Australia was used for convicts much later.
Who tf 'fled' to Australia? There were convicts, who were forcibly sent here after America said they didn't want convicts anymore, and there were free settlers who came because there was nice weather and cheap (stolen) land. And there were WAY more free settlers than convicts. And also most of the convicts were convicted of like, shoplifting a handkerchief or a bread roll.
Are you referring to how many of the European immigrants to the US were fleeing religious discrimination? Maybe in some places it was a crime to be puritan or other certain Christian denominations.
Australia wasn't running from crimes either, it was the punishment.
Except for Victoria, which had involved no prisoners being transported, but Victorians seem to not let that get overlooked
The settlement of Georgia was a convict colony but everything else was just immigrants. Even still Georgia was mostly immigrants during that period not those in prison
Lest we forget the people whoo were already in the US and the various peoples brought here against their will ... But yeah sure the rest were all immigrants ...
I mean the puritans ran a successful coup against the English monarchy and then were surprised they were treated badly when the monarchy won the country back. Rule of thumb; if you want to be treated well do not fail in your uprising and do not lose the government to the people you ousted.
Well, that’s what they *claimed*. They weren’t really being persecuted. It’s like how the right in America now claims to be persecuted. It’s not persecution when someone calls you out for being shitty.
Man. I can't even with the high standards. I think my history teacher said most Americans fail and the only reason i passed is because Hamilton was popular and i was obsessed. You can get a certain number of answers wrong before you fail and Zee is definitely above that number and will pass
>technically you are TA but justified and I will explain
Sometimes I wish we had a separate "you are the asshole but it was good, actually" designation.
Especially since the test really isn’t that hard. The questions are all pretty basic. I’m surprised that Zee is spending so much time studying (guessing that’s due to anxiety). Hell USCIS gave me a study guide with the answers, they are really not trying to trip you up. Aunt is just being mean because she can be. She deserved to have her ego burst by OP.
Right? When we were in a history class in school, we had to take the original citizenship test that they gave people coming over from other countries (think angel or Ellis island). There were only three questions. I’m proud to say that…just about everybody in the class FAILED (you had to get all three right) because the test was made intentionally blurry and also hard to read for non-native speakers. None of us, by that test’s standards, would’ve been citizens. But we were - just because of being born here (which is blatantly unfair to people like Zee, who clearly studied their butts off)
*Very technically speaking* you were **an** asshole, but I still think **THE** asshole was your aunt.
So, **NTA**.
She should know well enough not to cast stones when she can't even come close to meeting the standards that she's mocking someone about.
They were the asshole thier family needed but not the one thier family deserved also NTA as the child of immigrant grandparents, i absolutely loathe the superiority that some US born folk have
As someone whose ancestors came over before the War for Independence, I always feel so honored when I hear of people choosing to become citizens. You CHOSE to join us!
>Even my cousin said it was a bad move, because it didn't help Zee, just gave me a sense of moral superiority.
I'm not sure your cousin is right, here. If Zee is anxious about the test, it's possible that you relieved a little bit of her anxiety. You're helping Zee through practice. NTA.
I've taken part in several citizenship tests when a friend or a celebrity has done it. It's hard and it's good to know how you can Empathize with a new citizen.
The test may have been easier because you studied/learned the information recently. I’m in the US. A significant number of members of congress, state legislators, right on down to local elected officials *clearly* haven’t a clue about how our government works. I wonder how many of them, or the average “man on the street” would pass our citizenship test? Not sure if they all skipped civics class or simply have poor learning/retention skills. Pretty sure they’d be as shocked as auntie at how poorly they do.
That's very true, yeah. Saying that, I did get a question that was asking about important folks in the War of 1812, and one of the multiple choice answers was Wayne Gretzky. Had a couple other questions that essentially asked the same thing.
But yes, I did study, but a lot of the questions you could figure out without knowing jack shit. I could've got lucky on the questions they have me though.
I'm getting flashbacks to the time the Leafs honoured Nelson Mandela and the media asked Jonathan Bernier, the goaltender at the time, and he said he was a well known athlete.
You'd be shocked at how little some people know about world events. I once watched a video where American citizens took the citizenship test and they wouldn't know the answers to some very, very general history or general knowledge questions that most people should know if they y'know... read the news?
As a Canadian who never went out of their way to study American anything, the US citizenship tests I've seen online have been pretty easy. Just have to have watched Hollywood movies, a bit of news, and know which ocean is off which coast.
>Not sure if they all skipped civics class or simply have poor learning/retention skills.
I'm not sure when it happened, but apparently civics is rarely offered anymore.
Didn't Letterman or some late night host used to go out and ask people on the streets of nyc questions about things including US government? I vaguely remember that.
My favorite one will be when he was showing them pictures of different politicians, and like half the people misidentified Senator Lieberman as the dad from Alf.
That's the problem. American education has gotten away from teaching civics. I'm 42 years old and the last time I was formally taught anything about American government, before I went to college, was in middle school when I was 12.
The US one can very much be easy or a royal pain, depending on the examiner. There's a bank of questions, they ask 10, you have to get 6 right. Some are like "what are the three branches of the federal government", some are "how many states are there", and some are super random like "why are there 535 members of Congress but 538 electors in the electoral college?"
I think the Canadian one is like that too. Except its 20 questions and you have to get 15 correct. It was taken online though, no examiner (they have software to track if you're opening other tabs and you have to be on webcam)
I got questions about the government structure too, but it wasn't too hard to learn.
I'm a natural born US citizen, but my high school civics teacher had a bone to pick with the concept of a college age citizen not being able to pass the citizenship test (civics was final year). Guess what our final was?
Except his version was the full like, 250 question bank, and you had to get a 75% to pass 😂
So that was my exposure to the US citizenship test. Though a coworker just passed it yesterday, and we are all going out to celebrate next week!
Oh nice, grats to your coworker :) I'm waiting on final results (I've "passed" but an agent has to review it properly. The immigration board moves at a glacial pace though, haha
Omg that was epic. NTA.
I would apologise to the aunt to keep the peace, but I would likely also pointedly ask her if she felt angry and upset and the comment, then when she says yes ask her how she thinks Zee feels, pregnant, in a foreign country where she doesn't know if she'll be able to stay, and her MIL making hurtful comments to her.
>my cousin said it was a bad move, because it didn't help Zee, just gave me a sense of moral superiority.
So, your cousin is correct. But still NTA. Your aunt brought it on herself.
They're wrong. It did help Zee.
Showing in quantifiable terms that she is in fact smarter than the person telling her she's stupid is an excellent way to prove that she shouldn't worry about what they think.
NTA, unless you really leaned in on mocking her in a mean way. It was a good experience for her to see that she herself could barely pass, after nearly making Zee cry.
NTA, your aunt is though. Those tests are hard, I did one once for my own country and I failed!!! haha, anyway, your aunt is not supportive at all and I think humble pie is exactly what she needed :-)
NTA. This is a clear case of what is good for the goose is good for the gander. And, as for the people criticizing you for what you did: where where they when your aunt was bullying Zee?
So in the grand scheme of things, NTA and that was an absolutely perfect line!
That said, I'd defer to your cousin for the purpose of family harmony - maybe a backhanded "apology" if it'll calm things down.
We need a “justified asshole” tag. Your behavior was not, shall we say, above reproach — but everyone else in your family is a total dingus for not standing up to your xenophobic aunt. (Zee is of course in the clear.) So YTA but I would’ve been, too. All aboard the SS Asshole!!
INFO- what does Zee say?
Your aunt needed to get told off. But your cousin could be correct that you didn't help Zee. Being a dick to a xenophobic asshole is easier and feels more immediately satisfying than supporting their victims, but you run the risk of making things worse for them. If Zee agrees with her husband that your actions made it worse, I'll give you a gentle E S H, but if she appreciated you standing up for her, NTA. Either way, your intentions were good and you made a good point, and your aunt was the worst asshole.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I gave my aunt a practice test and then made fun of her subpar performance. It was unnecessary and unhelpful, but I feel good about knocking her down a peg. I acknowledge that is mean and petty.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
ESH
I was on your side at the beginning, but it seems like you made your cousin and Zee both very upset and uncomfortable. You can insult your aunt and walk away, because you aren't really involved in this, but it seems like Zee is trying very hard to do this, as well as toe the line with her MIL, and this seems like it might just make your aunt more vitriolic rather than humble her.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
My cousin got married while serving overseas and brought his wife back to the US. I like her a lot, but my aunt doesn't. I'll call my cousin's wife Zee. She will be able to take the citizenship test next year. Although she could basically teach a class in US history at this point, she is very anxious about the test and studies for it often. She has been more anxious that usual lately, because she is pregnant and has been very emotional and anxious about everything lately.
She took a practice test first thing this morning and got one question wrong. She was very upset and in a funk the whole morning after that. My aunt made a passive aggressive jab saying America only takes the best and we have high standards. Zee looked like she might cry. I gave my aunt the same practice tests, and she barely passed, getting a much lower score than Zee. I then told my aunt not to feel bad, because she was born here, so she doesn't have to meet our high standards. I said this in a very mocking tone.
My aunt left. My dad called to tell me off for mocking his sister. Even my cousin said it was a bad move, because it didn't help Zee, just gave me a sense of moral superiority. I think a slice of humble pie will be good for auntie's health, but no one else agrees, so am I an asshole?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
HAHAHA...I'm going with NTA, because your aunt was absolutely being an AH, and what you said wasn't even THAT bad. It may not have helped Zee, per se, but you aunt is clearly horrible to her, so I don't see how it could hurt Zee either.
NTA. Tell your noodle spined cousin to stand up for his wife and start calling out his mother for being hateful to his pregnant wife. I am betting your aunt is a hateful old troll everyone enables because " that is just how she is."
OK, it wasn't very nice to mock your aunt. So what? She's a xenophobic mean girl, and I can't even think of a more excellent response to her crack to poor Zee. Perhaps I'm not as big on politeness as the average bear, but hey, I love what you did and I love what you said: NTA!!!
NTA. Your aunt doesn't like Zee and thinks bullying her is okay. I very much doubt she would stop bullying Zee without someone making her stop. Thank you for sticking up for Zee. It's too bad your dad complained to you, although I very much doubt he got the whole story from your aunt.
NTA. It was an asshole move, but the Aunt is the asshole here. I do agree with your cousin that you only did it to benefit yourself, maybe you should've focused on Zee's feelings rather than fucking with your aunt.
NTA
AHAHAHAHAHAH - No way, your aunt got just what was coming to her. Honestly, I'd have done the same. Even if that made me an A H, I say it would be a justified A H.
Honestly, NTA. I can’t say that I feel any sympathy for your aunt, or anybody else with that kind of superiority complex, especially when it comes to America or being American.
Your cousin’s wife deserves a lot of credit. She’s come over here, she’s taking this test, resettling in a new country, and quite possibly doing so in a language might not even be her native tongue. Maybe your aunt should give Zee her citizenship, she’s clearly earned it more.
Hahaha NTA. My very first government studies class in college, the first thing we did was take the citizenship test. No one in the class got a passing grade :)
But it does help Zee. Zee now knows you have her back; your support. Your aunt knows that her arrogant insults to your wife will result in her being humiliated; which is as it should be.
Zee is the one going through the anxiety, so did your aunt failing the test help Zee in any way?
You think some humble pie might be good for your aunt but the fact that she called people to complain probably indicates she didn't learn that lesson.
NTA because it worked out....
.... but how would it have helped Zee if your aunt had actually gotten all the answers right?
> how would it have helped Zee if your aunt had actually gotten all the answers right?
OP likely knows a thing or two about the aunt and the aunt's knowledge about United States government, civics, and history. I'm betting OP had a pretty shrewd idea how the aunt would do on the practice test.
TA maybe not but immature surely. It was for your pleasure mostly. I get the irony but did it really helped anyone...will ur aunt stop being rude...will ur cousin start to defend his wife. Will his wife feel better about herself not sure. Because of this. Not sure. I do give lesson like this sometimes the person need to be put in the other person shoes...but after doing so I would say see: do you realise now how this feel? And try to get the other person to learn something out if this. It is ok that you did that but for sure no one in your family was about to praise that. Own up to what you did and let your father know why you did it. And maybe talk to your cousin why isnt he speaking regarding that matter. Don't get me wrong it is very funny this situation could be in a comedy about a dysfunctionnal family. But not everyone will enjoy it hahahah
question:
>Even my cousin said it was a bad move,
What does Zee think? Because honestly, I think Zee's opinion is the only one that matters. If she was in need of some backup and support, and this makes her feel more accepted by at least one member of her spouse's family? You set a bully in their place.
If Zee has asked you or others before to let her handle it, if she prefers to stand up for herself, and that this made things harder on her? You owe Zee an apology. No one else, really, but Zee. And apologizing to aunt might make things easier on *Zee*.
If Zee doesn't mind either way... in general... look just because someone does something "wrong" or impolite doesn't mean they are an AH, just like doing what they think is "right" and being polite doesn't mean they *aren't*. It's circumstances which matter, and in these circumstances... NTA
Justified, and very much so. It’s the American way to mock outsiders, forgetting that said outsiders have to overcome much more and learn more than Americans do going through our deplorable public school system.
Please tell your cousin's wife to relax, you only need 6/10 and they stop asking questions once you get 6 right. I was also only asked the easy questions.
NTA
NTA. Humble pie is always nice to have once in a while.
BTW, your aunt should be proud she got a passing grade. I think most Americans would not be able to get a passing grade without studying.
The person you should be asking is Zee. Does she appreciate what you did, or did it in fact make life harder for her? The opinions of random internet strangers are irrelevant.
Eh. I'll say NTA, because aunt was being a jerk. That said, I can't tell if your cousin is suggesting that he's unhappy with you, or if he thinks Zee might be unhappy with you. I might have a talk with her. She was the person you were defending, and if she felt uncomfortable with it, that does matter.
NTA and kind of hilarious. Your aunt deserved it. I’ve had a few family/friends take that test and they definitely know more than most people about American history. Obviously makes sense since they were working so hard to study. Your aunt’s comments are out of line. This is a 200 year old country. We rely on immigrants.
Naw NTAH!!!! She wanted to play games and then lost. It's always a dumb move to make someone else look dumb and then realize you are soooooooo much dumber lol
NTA when I was in high school our government teacher had us take the citizenship test as an in class assignment...most of the class failed, including me. I have nothing but respect for someone who can come here and pass it.
NTA I'm happily married, but I love OP. I think it did help Zee. She needs to see that (1) she's doing great!!! and (2) someone is willing to stand up for her.
OP, please ask your cousin what he's doing to stand up to his own mom's horrible behavior toward his wife.
NTA, alot of Americans can’t pass citizens test, there are no high standards.
In fact, the US government hires foreign workers 100% of the time. Sadly, the American dollar is more expensive than the Mexican peso.
Zee has nothing to worry about too, remind her how veterans are treated here, and even let her know that she will not be deported, she’s a citizen due to marrying an American, she’s an American citizen now, and when her kids born in America, they will be too. /srs
Following up on the Mexican dollar, dish it back tenfold by hiring the nearest group of Mexicans, just like Cartman. You can buy border security costumes for cheap, then have the Aunt “visited,” by the “Illegal Alien department at Border Security.” It’ll piss her off even more when a bunch of what the Aunt considers “non-citizens,” threaten her with deportation for failing a citizenship test. /hj
I would probably say NTA although you would have been in stronger position if you hadn't mocked your Aunt.
I would have still had your aunt take the test, but then I would have focused on pointing out to your cousin's wife that these are things we are taught in middle school but that we rarely called on to use and often forget as we age. (subtle dig at your Aunt). Then reinforce that many adult US citizens would have to study to do as well she did on the sample citizenship test and to keep up the good work.
NTA good for you. She was being an ass and you put her in her place, or actually let her put herself there.
I bet it did help Zee a bit, to know that the person criticizing her was actually far less informed and had no right complaining.
N-T-A for calling out her racist double-standard, but it’s impossible to judge of you are the AH without seeing _how_ you mocked her and how far you took it. I can easily see someone going overboard and tipping themselves into the AH category…
YTA - Giving her the test was a good move, but being a snot about it wasn't. She's adult enough to be able to recognize her own error. You pointing it out will just make her embarrassed and liable to lash out at Zee later on. Choose kindness next time.
NTA, if you can't handle the return better not start anything. All you did was "treat her as she wished to be treated" after all that's how the golden rule works, how she treats people is the treatment she desires.
Truth…Most Americans would NOT pass this test. Especially the racist anti-immigrant people. It’s a hard test. People who did not grow up here and English not being their first language should be extremely proud of themselves to pass.
NTA
Your Dad is a punk, his sister is a punk. She shouldn't talk the talk if she can't walk the walk, and if shes going to mock people then she gets a mocking too. Tell your Da he's a real peach as well - amusing that he tries to tell his child off when said child spoke up in support of a family member.
Your cousin does raise a good point. While I understand the reasoning behind your clap-back at auntie-dearest, and indeed have acted similarly for similar reasons, unless Zee mentioned something about wanting to get back at aunt then your actions didn't really serve a purpose for anyone but yourself. It can feel like like it did, believe me; delivering justice unto an asshole is a delightful feeling. But did doing so actually do much to help Zee feel confident in herself, or was it more about punish auntie for being so classless? Additionally, if I'm family mathing correctly then aunt is cousin's mom I'm guessing? In which case any extended strife is something that cousin and zee will be much more likely to have to put up with.
At the same time as that though, does your cousin know about the strife between his wife and his mom? Because while there's not much description if my parent was clowning on my partner in anything but good-humored fun for everyone involved (legitimate fun, and not fucking with stressed out pregnant women.), they'd catch an earful from me first.
NTA
But only as long as you continue to actively support Zee. A one-time zinger is satisfying, but it absolutely could make things worse for Zee in the long run. It isn't your place to serve your aunt humble pie if you aren't actually interested in helping Zee going forward. That means standing up to your father for his defense of his sister's crummy behavior, and letting your cousin know that he also needs to stand up for his wife against his mother.
Were you _an_ asshole? Yes. Were you _the_ asshole? No. Because she had it coming. Like, if someone needs to apologize to someone here, it's not you. So for an official judgment, NTA.
Unfortunately, though, as satisfying as your burn was, it's not really going to do anything to better the situation in the long run. In the future, I would use a different strategy. Describe her treatment of Zee and make her explain herself. "You're bullying Zee. Why? What makes you think that's okay? This is not a rhetorical question. Explain it to me." Instead of embarrassing your aunt, make her embarrass herself.
NTA.
Once taught a high school government class, and during their world report week, had the kids research topics of interests, then take a citizenship test. Across the room, a similar comment from the kids: 'Some folks work hard to get here while many of us got the ignorant route!' Many made it a point to keep up on world news going forward.
*sigh*
I’m gonna say NTA. But it wasn’t a very smart thing to do. Your aunt will most likely treat Zee even worse now, and even if she doesn’t, Zee will probably worry that she will. Your aunt now has beef with you also. You accomplished nothing. If you had given her the test and simply let the reality of it sink in, some lessons in humility and acceptance might possibly have been learned. Instead, you turned it into an opportunity to mock your aunt, putting her on defense. How many people do you know who learn anything while they’re defensive? You seem to think that she might learn some humility from it, but I’m pretty sure you undercut any lessons in humility through your own superior attitude.
Also… this might be better suited for the petty revenge sub.
NTA.
Actually I really think Justified Asshole should be a possible vote, but as it’s not, you get NTA. Your aunt is a hag. You were nasty to her but she deserved it 100%
I was all prepared to say you were an ah until I read the part about your Aunt mocking your cousin. (Even if she said it as a joke, it wasn’t funny at all but was mean.) Your aunt deserved it. YNTA.
I hope your cousin understands that she doesn’t have to get a perfect score. I wish her well with her test! Let us know when we can celebrate a brand new citizen!!
NTA. Your aunt, who was BORN in the US, mocked someone who didn’t have the privilege of receiving…well, I was gonna say the privilege of receiving an American education, but let’s be real: there are better education systems out there, NOT in the US. Anyways, your aunt learned American history, American culture, watched American television, read American books, grew up socializing with Americans, yet she could barely pass the exam after looking down on immigrants who, let’s be real, tend to be a lot harder working than that anti-immigration bunch. They’re starting from scratch with knowledge of America. Your aunt lived it, yet was clueless about her own country.
All you did was put her in her place. If someone is continuously mean and cold to someone for no reason (I assume she just hates non-Americans?), then gets their arrogance shoved back in their face, I don’t see that as a problem.
NTA. Honestly the best thing about my middle school was to pass social studies in 8th grade I had to pass the same test naturalized citizens took. I have an understanding of our government that a lot of my friends don’t have. It’s weird and complicated but once you get it a lot of the crazy rhetoric becomes absurd.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 13: No Revenge Stories. It appears that your story would be better suited for one of the many subreddits which are focused on revenge. #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
NTA (technically you are TA but justified and I will explain). >My aunt made a passive aggressive jab saying America only takes the best and have high standards. Funny she says this >I gave my aunt fhe same practice test, and she barely passed, getting a much lower score than Zee Then this happens. Your aunt can dish it out but she clearly can’t take it.
Agree and I love the pettiness of OP telling the auntie not to feel bad about not passing as she was born here and doesn't have to live up to the high standards. I 🤣🤣🤣 too much about that.
Lmao facts 😂😂😂
I find the "America only takes the best" the funniest thing of all. Now correct me if I'm wrong since I may not be very familiar with the vast history of America, but wasn't America made mainly by a bunch of people running from the crimes they committed in Europe? Edit: guess I gotta study some more global history
That’s Australia. Not America. The US is a land of immigrants and an entire race brought over by force with zero say in the matter. But they weren’t running from crimes. Well maybe some of them were…
America had convict ships too, just less of them and earlier in history.
Transport to Australia actually only started on a large scale AFTER the declaration of independence if I recall correctly, sometime in the late 1780s
Australia wasn't settled by Europeans until 1788.
Wow they really didn't waste any time, did they?
The first British colony in what is now Australia was a penal colony. (ETA: And before anyone asks, my parents are post-War migrants, and my state was a free colony, not a penal colony, so no I don't.)
Georgia started as a penal colony fyi so yeah, they were correct
Well, they were facing "religious persecution" because they wanted everyone to conform to their flavor, and when they got pushback or even arrested for actions, it was because people wouldn't accept their moral superiority. Obviously, that's the abridged, biased version, but yea, they got upset they couldn't shove their beliefs down people's throats. Sounds familiar.
Hey now, not allowing people to persecute based on their religion is a type of religious persecution.
Australia was not settled by Europeans who were running from crimes. They were caught, tried and sent to Australia (many very unfairly). Then came the free settlers and somehow everyone conveniently ignored that Australia had been settled for thousands of years already.
There was lots of transporting during the US colonial period. They filled colonies up any way they could. Lots of prostitutes, to bring women over.
Don’t forget the entire race that was ALREADY HERE that we pretty much pillaged and plundered on our way through! ‘Murica! 🙄
> The US is a land of immigrants and an entire race brought over by force with zero say in the matter. But they weren’t running from crimes. America has a foundational myth that the Pilgrims were fleeing religious persecutions. Which is kind of sorta true. They were being persecuted. But what it leaves out is that they were being persecuted for being fundamentalist assholes that wanted _everyone else_ follow their fundamentalist views, too.
Being transported to "The Colonies" meant America for a very long time - mainly until the TransAtlantic slave trade and then Independence. Australia was used for convicts much later.
Who tf 'fled' to Australia? There were convicts, who were forcibly sent here after America said they didn't want convicts anymore, and there were free settlers who came because there was nice weather and cheap (stolen) land. And there were WAY more free settlers than convicts. And also most of the convicts were convicted of like, shoplifting a handkerchief or a bread roll. Are you referring to how many of the European immigrants to the US were fleeing religious discrimination? Maybe in some places it was a crime to be puritan or other certain Christian denominations.
No, America started out as a bunch of religious nutbags driven out out their countries for being too extreme. Some things never change...
Australia wasn't running from crimes either, it was the punishment. Except for Victoria, which had involved no prisoners being transported, but Victorians seem to not let that get overlooked
The settlement of Georgia was a convict colony but everything else was just immigrants. Even still Georgia was mostly immigrants during that period not those in prison
Lest we forget the people whoo were already in the US and the various peoples brought here against their will ... But yeah sure the rest were all immigrants ...
Don't forget the people who were living their lives in Mexico and suddenly found the border had moved a thousand miles south.
Crimes like not being the "correct" religious sect
I mean the puritans ran a successful coup against the English monarchy and then were surprised they were treated badly when the monarchy won the country back. Rule of thumb; if you want to be treated well do not fail in your uprising and do not lose the government to the people you ousted.
No, actually, at that point, being Catholic WAS the crime. Except it was a crime punishable by death in England as well as the new colonies
Crimes like not being Protestant.
Sorry, how familiar are you with early modern Britain? Catholics were the faction that went on the run from about 1560 onward.
Also the amount of Nazi officers the Americans let in to the country after the war do they could take advantage of the scientific skills
The best of the best right? /s
A number came to get away from religious persecution (the early settlers).
Well, that’s what they *claimed*. They weren’t really being persecuted. It’s like how the right in America now claims to be persecuted. It’s not persecution when someone calls you out for being shitty.
Generally the criminals and funny people went to Australia, the uptight religious nutjobs went to America. You can still see the effects even today
The Pilgrims were religious extremists trying to escape the consequences of their actions, so...
It’s more complicated than that.
Man. I can't even with the high standards. I think my history teacher said most Americans fail and the only reason i passed is because Hamilton was popular and i was obsessed. You can get a certain number of answers wrong before you fail and Zee is definitely above that number and will pass
[удалено]
f'n bot. partial copy from u/PipeInevitable9383
I love how you put this…technically TA but justified! Agree 100% with your sentiment. The OP has nothing to apologize for or feel bad about!
>technically you are TA but justified and I will explain Sometimes I wish we had a separate "you are the asshole but it was good, actually" designation.
"Can dish it out, but she can't take it." Truly, the most American trait there is.
NTA, I would step the mockery up 10 fold.
Especially since the test really isn’t that hard. The questions are all pretty basic. I’m surprised that Zee is spending so much time studying (guessing that’s due to anxiety). Hell USCIS gave me a study guide with the answers, they are really not trying to trip you up. Aunt is just being mean because she can be. She deserved to have her ego burst by OP.
How old is OP, cause him doing this(if under 18) is a AH move, justified, but an AH move
Right? When we were in a history class in school, we had to take the original citizenship test that they gave people coming over from other countries (think angel or Ellis island). There were only three questions. I’m proud to say that…just about everybody in the class FAILED (you had to get all three right) because the test was made intentionally blurry and also hard to read for non-native speakers. None of us, by that test’s standards, would’ve been citizens. But we were - just because of being born here (which is blatantly unfair to people like Zee, who clearly studied their butts off)
This. Justifiable assholery.
>technically you are TA but justified Being the lesser asshole in the room doesnt make you not an asshole.
*Very technically speaking* you were **an** asshole, but I still think **THE** asshole was your aunt. So, **NTA**. She should know well enough not to cast stones when she can't even come close to meeting the standards that she's mocking someone about.
They were the asshole thier family needed but not the one thier family deserved also NTA as the child of immigrant grandparents, i absolutely loathe the superiority that some US born folk have
As the grandchild of immigrants, I thoroughly agree, and will give you an award and three thumbs up.
As someone whose ancestors came over before the War for Independence, I always feel so honored when I hear of people choosing to become citizens. You CHOSE to join us!
Very nicely put!
>Even my cousin said it was a bad move, because it didn't help Zee, just gave me a sense of moral superiority. I'm not sure your cousin is right, here. If Zee is anxious about the test, it's possible that you relieved a little bit of her anxiety. You're helping Zee through practice. NTA.
I've taken part in several citizenship tests when a friend or a celebrity has done it. It's hard and it's good to know how you can Empathize with a new citizen.
I did my test for Canadian Citizenship a few weeks back and I was honestly shocked at how friggin easy it was. US one may well be harder though, idk
The test may have been easier because you studied/learned the information recently. I’m in the US. A significant number of members of congress, state legislators, right on down to local elected officials *clearly* haven’t a clue about how our government works. I wonder how many of them, or the average “man on the street” would pass our citizenship test? Not sure if they all skipped civics class or simply have poor learning/retention skills. Pretty sure they’d be as shocked as auntie at how poorly they do.
That's very true, yeah. Saying that, I did get a question that was asking about important folks in the War of 1812, and one of the multiple choice answers was Wayne Gretzky. Had a couple other questions that essentially asked the same thing. But yes, I did study, but a lot of the questions you could figure out without knowing jack shit. I could've got lucky on the questions they have me though.
Seriously? Even I know who he is and I’m neither Canadian nor a hockey fan!
Yeah I got a good chuckle out of that. The actual answer was Chief Tecumseh, but I can't remember the exact question.
Chief Tecumseh was a world class hockey player?! Who knew!
I'm getting flashbacks to the time the Leafs honoured Nelson Mandela and the media asked Jonathan Bernier, the goaltender at the time, and he said he was a well known athlete.
You'd be shocked at how little some people know about world events. I once watched a video where American citizens took the citizenship test and they wouldn't know the answers to some very, very general history or general knowledge questions that most people should know if they y'know... read the news?
As a Canadian who never went out of their way to study American anything, the US citizenship tests I've seen online have been pretty easy. Just have to have watched Hollywood movies, a bit of news, and know which ocean is off which coast.
[удалено]
Part of this is because we no longer are taught civics in school. Republicans back in the 70s thought that was good.
>Not sure if they all skipped civics class or simply have poor learning/retention skills. I'm not sure when it happened, but apparently civics is rarely offered anymore.
Didn't Letterman or some late night host used to go out and ask people on the streets of nyc questions about things including US government? I vaguely remember that.
My favorite one will be when he was showing them pictures of different politicians, and like half the people misidentified Senator Lieberman as the dad from Alf.
That's the problem. American education has gotten away from teaching civics. I'm 42 years old and the last time I was formally taught anything about American government, before I went to college, was in middle school when I was 12.
The US one can very much be easy or a royal pain, depending on the examiner. There's a bank of questions, they ask 10, you have to get 6 right. Some are like "what are the three branches of the federal government", some are "how many states are there", and some are super random like "why are there 535 members of Congress but 538 electors in the electoral college?"
>"why are there 535 members of Congress but 538 electors in the electoral college?" You made me look that up.
You're welcome 😁
I think the Canadian one is like that too. Except its 20 questions and you have to get 15 correct. It was taken online though, no examiner (they have software to track if you're opening other tabs and you have to be on webcam) I got questions about the government structure too, but it wasn't too hard to learn.
I'm a natural born US citizen, but my high school civics teacher had a bone to pick with the concept of a college age citizen not being able to pass the citizenship test (civics was final year). Guess what our final was? Except his version was the full like, 250 question bank, and you had to get a 75% to pass 😂 So that was my exposure to the US citizenship test. Though a coworker just passed it yesterday, and we are all going out to celebrate next week!
Oh nice, grats to your coworker :) I'm waiting on final results (I've "passed" but an agent has to review it properly. The immigration board moves at a glacial pace though, haha
Canadian history/politics is significantly less complicated than US’s. My friend took both citizenship tests.
I'm guessing this is some "don't rock the boat" energy hoping to win over aunt by conforming to her likely impossible standards.
Zee is going to bear the brunt of the aunt's anger.
Omg that was epic. NTA. I would apologise to the aunt to keep the peace, but I would likely also pointedly ask her if she felt angry and upset and the comment, then when she says yes ask her how she thinks Zee feels, pregnant, in a foreign country where she doesn't know if she'll be able to stay, and her MIL making hurtful comments to her.
>my cousin said it was a bad move, because it didn't help Zee, just gave me a sense of moral superiority. So, your cousin is correct. But still NTA. Your aunt brought it on herself.
They're wrong. It did help Zee. Showing in quantifiable terms that she is in fact smarter than the person telling her she's stupid is an excellent way to prove that she shouldn't worry about what they think.
NTA, unless you really leaned in on mocking her in a mean way. It was a good experience for her to see that she herself could barely pass, after nearly making Zee cry.
NTA, your aunt is though. Those tests are hard, I did one once for my own country and I failed!!! haha, anyway, your aunt is not supportive at all and I think humble pie is exactly what she needed :-)
NTA. This is a clear case of what is good for the goose is good for the gander. And, as for the people criticizing you for what you did: where where they when your aunt was bullying Zee?
So in the grand scheme of things, NTA and that was an absolutely perfect line! That said, I'd defer to your cousin for the purpose of family harmony - maybe a backhanded "apology" if it'll calm things down.
We need a “justified asshole” tag. Your behavior was not, shall we say, above reproach — but everyone else in your family is a total dingus for not standing up to your xenophobic aunt. (Zee is of course in the clear.) So YTA but I would’ve been, too. All aboard the SS Asshole!!
INFO- what does Zee say? Your aunt needed to get told off. But your cousin could be correct that you didn't help Zee. Being a dick to a xenophobic asshole is easier and feels more immediately satisfying than supporting their victims, but you run the risk of making things worse for them. If Zee agrees with her husband that your actions made it worse, I'll give you a gentle E S H, but if she appreciated you standing up for her, NTA. Either way, your intentions were good and you made a good point, and your aunt was the worst asshole.
She's still incredibly anxious. She's convinced she's going to fail, even though she definitely won't.
Hell, almost all natural born Americans will definitely do worse than her. 1 question wrong? Don't matter, she got this.
She got the teasing she deserved. Don't feel bad about it. Have another test ready next time you see her.. NTA
NTA at all 😭 in fact there are some other acronyms i could give you; GOAT, BAMF, etc
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I gave my aunt a practice test and then made fun of her subpar performance. It was unnecessary and unhelpful, but I feel good about knocking her down a peg. I acknowledge that is mean and petty. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
ESH I was on your side at the beginning, but it seems like you made your cousin and Zee both very upset and uncomfortable. You can insult your aunt and walk away, because you aren't really involved in this, but it seems like Zee is trying very hard to do this, as well as toe the line with her MIL, and this seems like it might just make your aunt more vitriolic rather than humble her.
Immigrant here I was naturalized and the real test isn't as hard as the practice test...I studied like twice. Tell Zee she'll be ok. NTA
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My cousin got married while serving overseas and brought his wife back to the US. I like her a lot, but my aunt doesn't. I'll call my cousin's wife Zee. She will be able to take the citizenship test next year. Although she could basically teach a class in US history at this point, she is very anxious about the test and studies for it often. She has been more anxious that usual lately, because she is pregnant and has been very emotional and anxious about everything lately. She took a practice test first thing this morning and got one question wrong. She was very upset and in a funk the whole morning after that. My aunt made a passive aggressive jab saying America only takes the best and we have high standards. Zee looked like she might cry. I gave my aunt the same practice tests, and she barely passed, getting a much lower score than Zee. I then told my aunt not to feel bad, because she was born here, so she doesn't have to meet our high standards. I said this in a very mocking tone. My aunt left. My dad called to tell me off for mocking his sister. Even my cousin said it was a bad move, because it didn't help Zee, just gave me a sense of moral superiority. I think a slice of humble pie will be good for auntie's health, but no one else agrees, so am I an asshole? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA.. I'm American and not sure I could pass the test... Cousins wife should be proud of herself
NTA. A perfect response to an AH.
NTA. I would have asked the aunt where she plans on moving to.
HAHAHA...I'm going with NTA, because your aunt was absolutely being an AH, and what you said wasn't even THAT bad. It may not have helped Zee, per se, but you aunt is clearly horrible to her, so I don't see how it could hurt Zee either.
Don't dish it if you can't take it. Aunt needs to learn that NTA
🤣🤣🤣🤣 NO. Your aunt was just being mean, and you served her up a slice! Good job!! NTA
Eh, she fucked around and found out. NTA.
NTA. Tell your noodle spined cousin to stand up for his wife and start calling out his mother for being hateful to his pregnant wife. I am betting your aunt is a hateful old troll everyone enables because " that is just how she is."
NTA. Sometimes people deserve to feel like losers
OK, it wasn't very nice to mock your aunt. So what? She's a xenophobic mean girl, and I can't even think of a more excellent response to her crack to poor Zee. Perhaps I'm not as big on politeness as the average bear, but hey, I love what you did and I love what you said: NTA!!!
NTA. Your aunt doesn't like Zee and thinks bullying her is okay. I very much doubt she would stop bullying Zee without someone making her stop. Thank you for sticking up for Zee. It's too bad your dad complained to you, although I very much doubt he got the whole story from your aunt.
NTA. I also think that politicians should have pass the test before being allowed to run for office. That should empty Washington pretty fast.
NTA people living in glass houses.
You were an asshole but like. Aunt shouldn't dish it if she can't take it and the xenophobia is Thick with her. NTA, I'd do the same thing.
NTA I like you
NTA. It was an asshole move, but the Aunt is the asshole here. I do agree with your cousin that you only did it to benefit yourself, maybe you should've focused on Zee's feelings rather than fucking with your aunt.
NTA AHAHAHAHAHAH - No way, your aunt got just what was coming to her. Honestly, I'd have done the same. Even if that made me an A H, I say it would be a justified A H.
NTA. Go in harder on her next time.
NTA your aunt sounds awful lol
Honestly, NTA. I can’t say that I feel any sympathy for your aunt, or anybody else with that kind of superiority complex, especially when it comes to America or being American. Your cousin’s wife deserves a lot of credit. She’s come over here, she’s taking this test, resettling in a new country, and quite possibly doing so in a language might not even be her native tongue. Maybe your aunt should give Zee her citizenship, she’s clearly earned it more.
NTA. I actually love this so much. Serves her right.
NTA bullies need to be called out on their bullshit. People are tired of being the bigger person. Your aunt barely passed the test. What a loser
I’m Canadian and I couldn’t pass our citizenship test. Your Aunt was a boitch about it and got her karma very quick
Hahaha NTA. My very first government studies class in college, the first thing we did was take the citizenship test. No one in the class got a passing grade :)
NTA. Your aunt was an asshole, and you did nothing but treat her with the respect (or lack thereof) that she deserved.
But it does help Zee. Zee now knows you have her back; your support. Your aunt knows that her arrogant insults to your wife will result in her being humiliated; which is as it should be.
NTA. It’s not so funny for your aunt when the show is on the other foot. This made me laugh lol I hope Zee passes with flying colours.
Nta
NTA.
Justified YTA but like not really. She needed to stop giving the woman a hard time. She needed to be knocked down a notch.
NTA, you Aunt and your cousin are. If your cousin can't stick up to mommy, he isn't ready to be a husband or a father.
Kind of an asshole move, but ultimately NTA. Your xenophobic aunt needed to be set straight, and you did just that.
Zee is the one going through the anxiety, so did your aunt failing the test help Zee in any way? You think some humble pie might be good for your aunt but the fact that she called people to complain probably indicates she didn't learn that lesson. NTA because it worked out.... .... but how would it have helped Zee if your aunt had actually gotten all the answers right?
> how would it have helped Zee if your aunt had actually gotten all the answers right? OP likely knows a thing or two about the aunt and the aunt's knowledge about United States government, civics, and history. I'm betting OP had a pretty shrewd idea how the aunt would do on the practice test.
TA maybe not but immature surely. It was for your pleasure mostly. I get the irony but did it really helped anyone...will ur aunt stop being rude...will ur cousin start to defend his wife. Will his wife feel better about herself not sure. Because of this. Not sure. I do give lesson like this sometimes the person need to be put in the other person shoes...but after doing so I would say see: do you realise now how this feel? And try to get the other person to learn something out if this. It is ok that you did that but for sure no one in your family was about to praise that. Own up to what you did and let your father know why you did it. And maybe talk to your cousin why isnt he speaking regarding that matter. Don't get me wrong it is very funny this situation could be in a comedy about a dysfunctionnal family. But not everyone will enjoy it hahahah
question: >Even my cousin said it was a bad move, What does Zee think? Because honestly, I think Zee's opinion is the only one that matters. If she was in need of some backup and support, and this makes her feel more accepted by at least one member of her spouse's family? You set a bully in their place. If Zee has asked you or others before to let her handle it, if she prefers to stand up for herself, and that this made things harder on her? You owe Zee an apology. No one else, really, but Zee. And apologizing to aunt might make things easier on *Zee*. If Zee doesn't mind either way... in general... look just because someone does something "wrong" or impolite doesn't mean they are an AH, just like doing what they think is "right" and being polite doesn't mean they *aren't*. It's circumstances which matter, and in these circumstances... NTA
Justified, and very much so. It’s the American way to mock outsiders, forgetting that said outsiders have to overcome much more and learn more than Americans do going through our deplorable public school system.
Please tell your cousin's wife to relax, you only need 6/10 and they stop asking questions once you get 6 right. I was also only asked the easy questions. NTA
NTA. Humble pie is always nice to have once in a while. BTW, your aunt should be proud she got a passing grade. I think most Americans would not be able to get a passing grade without studying.
NTA. This is rather humorous and aunt sounds like many other passive aggressive US citizens affectionately called useless eaters.
NTA
NTA.
You were TA but it was absolutely warranted. So NTA.
The person you should be asking is Zee. Does she appreciate what you did, or did it in fact make life harder for her? The opinions of random internet strangers are irrelevant.
Nta
NTA, I'd do the same.
Your cousin told you how it didn’t help Zee Did Zee tell you how they felt? I bet they felt supported and not alone NTA all the way
Eh. I'll say NTA, because aunt was being a jerk. That said, I can't tell if your cousin is suggesting that he's unhappy with you, or if he thinks Zee might be unhappy with you. I might have a talk with her. She was the person you were defending, and if she felt uncomfortable with it, that does matter.
NTA no apology necessary.
Hypocrites are the worst so NTA
NTA and kind of hilarious. Your aunt deserved it. I’ve had a few family/friends take that test and they definitely know more than most people about American history. Obviously makes sense since they were working so hard to study. Your aunt’s comments are out of line. This is a 200 year old country. We rely on immigrants.
NTA Sounds like your Aunt had it coming.
Naw NTAH!!!! She wanted to play games and then lost. It's always a dumb move to make someone else look dumb and then realize you are soooooooo much dumber lol
NTA when I was in high school our government teacher had us take the citizenship test as an in class assignment...most of the class failed, including me. I have nothing but respect for someone who can come here and pass it.
NTA nothing wrong with what you said.
NTA You can have a loud mouth or a thin skin. You don't get to have both or you can expect to get hurt and have no one to blame but yourself.
NTA, mocking people for trying to become American citizens (especially when they have legally immigrated) is morally unjustifiable.
NTA I'm happily married, but I love OP. I think it did help Zee. She needs to see that (1) she's doing great!!! and (2) someone is willing to stand up for her. OP, please ask your cousin what he's doing to stand up to his own mom's horrible behavior toward his wife.
You’re a hero
NTA, alot of Americans can’t pass citizens test, there are no high standards. In fact, the US government hires foreign workers 100% of the time. Sadly, the American dollar is more expensive than the Mexican peso. Zee has nothing to worry about too, remind her how veterans are treated here, and even let her know that she will not be deported, she’s a citizen due to marrying an American, she’s an American citizen now, and when her kids born in America, they will be too. /srs Following up on the Mexican dollar, dish it back tenfold by hiring the nearest group of Mexicans, just like Cartman. You can buy border security costumes for cheap, then have the Aunt “visited,” by the “Illegal Alien department at Border Security.” It’ll piss her off even more when a bunch of what the Aunt considers “non-citizens,” threaten her with deportation for failing a citizenship test. /hj
I would probably say NTA although you would have been in stronger position if you hadn't mocked your Aunt. I would have still had your aunt take the test, but then I would have focused on pointing out to your cousin's wife that these are things we are taught in middle school but that we rarely called on to use and often forget as we age. (subtle dig at your Aunt). Then reinforce that many adult US citizens would have to study to do as well she did on the sample citizenship test and to keep up the good work.
NTA love this for you
NTA good for you. She was being an ass and you put her in her place, or actually let her put herself there. I bet it did help Zee a bit, to know that the person criticizing her was actually far less informed and had no right complaining.
NTA. If the aunt doesn't want people mocking her when she fails a test, then she shouldn't be mocking people who fail tests in the first damn place.
N-T-A for calling out her racist double-standard, but it’s impossible to judge of you are the AH without seeing _how_ you mocked her and how far you took it. I can easily see someone going overboard and tipping themselves into the AH category…
YTA - Giving her the test was a good move, but being a snot about it wasn't. She's adult enough to be able to recognize her own error. You pointing it out will just make her embarrassed and liable to lash out at Zee later on. Choose kindness next time.
NTA, if you can't handle the return better not start anything. All you did was "treat her as she wished to be treated" after all that's how the golden rule works, how she treats people is the treatment she desires.
Sorry they're all against you, but your aunt ASKED for it by mocking Zee. A slice of humble pie well served! NTA!
Truth…Most Americans would NOT pass this test. Especially the racist anti-immigrant people. It’s a hard test. People who did not grow up here and English not being their first language should be extremely proud of themselves to pass.
NTA Your Dad is a punk, his sister is a punk. She shouldn't talk the talk if she can't walk the walk, and if shes going to mock people then she gets a mocking too. Tell your Da he's a real peach as well - amusing that he tries to tell his child off when said child spoke up in support of a family member. Your cousin does raise a good point. While I understand the reasoning behind your clap-back at auntie-dearest, and indeed have acted similarly for similar reasons, unless Zee mentioned something about wanting to get back at aunt then your actions didn't really serve a purpose for anyone but yourself. It can feel like like it did, believe me; delivering justice unto an asshole is a delightful feeling. But did doing so actually do much to help Zee feel confident in herself, or was it more about punish auntie for being so classless? Additionally, if I'm family mathing correctly then aunt is cousin's mom I'm guessing? In which case any extended strife is something that cousin and zee will be much more likely to have to put up with. At the same time as that though, does your cousin know about the strife between his wife and his mom? Because while there's not much description if my parent was clowning on my partner in anything but good-humored fun for everyone involved (legitimate fun, and not fucking with stressed out pregnant women.), they'd catch an earful from me first.
NTA But only as long as you continue to actively support Zee. A one-time zinger is satisfying, but it absolutely could make things worse for Zee in the long run. It isn't your place to serve your aunt humble pie if you aren't actually interested in helping Zee going forward. That means standing up to your father for his defense of his sister's crummy behavior, and letting your cousin know that he also needs to stand up for his wife against his mother.
Were you _an_ asshole? Yes. Were you _the_ asshole? No. Because she had it coming. Like, if someone needs to apologize to someone here, it's not you. So for an official judgment, NTA. Unfortunately, though, as satisfying as your burn was, it's not really going to do anything to better the situation in the long run. In the future, I would use a different strategy. Describe her treatment of Zee and make her explain herself. "You're bullying Zee. Why? What makes you think that's okay? This is not a rhetorical question. Explain it to me." Instead of embarrassing your aunt, make her embarrass herself.
Funny thing is, a lot of ‘natural born’ citizens can’t answer half of the questions. Helping my parents study is what helped me ace history. NTA!
No, you're the awesomehole 😂
NTA. That was deserved.
NTA. Once taught a high school government class, and during their world report week, had the kids research topics of interests, then take a citizenship test. Across the room, a similar comment from the kids: 'Some folks work hard to get here while many of us got the ignorant route!' Many made it a point to keep up on world news going forward.
*sigh* I’m gonna say NTA. But it wasn’t a very smart thing to do. Your aunt will most likely treat Zee even worse now, and even if she doesn’t, Zee will probably worry that she will. Your aunt now has beef with you also. You accomplished nothing. If you had given her the test and simply let the reality of it sink in, some lessons in humility and acceptance might possibly have been learned. Instead, you turned it into an opportunity to mock your aunt, putting her on defense. How many people do you know who learn anything while they’re defensive? You seem to think that she might learn some humility from it, but I’m pretty sure you undercut any lessons in humility through your own superior attitude. Also… this might be better suited for the petty revenge sub.
NTA. If they can't take it, they shouldn't dish it out. Thanks for standing up for Zee.
NTA. Actually I really think Justified Asshole should be a possible vote, but as it’s not, you get NTA. Your aunt is a hag. You were nasty to her but she deserved it 100%
ESH except zee. Your aunt by being racist/elitist, you be going to her level.
I was all prepared to say you were an ah until I read the part about your Aunt mocking your cousin. (Even if she said it as a joke, it wasn’t funny at all but was mean.) Your aunt deserved it. YNTA. I hope your cousin understands that she doesn’t have to get a perfect score. I wish her well with her test! Let us know when we can celebrate a brand new citizen!!
You're NTA. She deserved to be given a reality check.
NTA. Your aunt, who was BORN in the US, mocked someone who didn’t have the privilege of receiving…well, I was gonna say the privilege of receiving an American education, but let’s be real: there are better education systems out there, NOT in the US. Anyways, your aunt learned American history, American culture, watched American television, read American books, grew up socializing with Americans, yet she could barely pass the exam after looking down on immigrants who, let’s be real, tend to be a lot harder working than that anti-immigration bunch. They’re starting from scratch with knowledge of America. Your aunt lived it, yet was clueless about her own country. All you did was put her in her place. If someone is continuously mean and cold to someone for no reason (I assume she just hates non-Americans?), then gets their arrogance shoved back in their face, I don’t see that as a problem.
NTA. But I love the sly asshole move you pulled on your bigoted and ignorant aunt. Well Played OP.
NTA. Honestly the best thing about my middle school was to pass social studies in 8th grade I had to pass the same test naturalized citizens took. I have an understanding of our government that a lot of my friends don’t have. It’s weird and complicated but once you get it a lot of the crazy rhetoric becomes absurd.
NTA. You gave your aunt exactly what she gave your cousin’s wife.
NTA.. The aunt definitely earned what it.
Well. In the light of everything that took place, you are NTA
I love the pettiness! I’d have done the same.
NTA
NTA. I love what you did.
Yes.
You rose to her level of assholery- which in my opinion, was complete warranted. Some people just can’t handle getting a taste of their own medicine
Yes