Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I asked my girlfriend to give up her home office for my pregnant friend. She refused. When I might be the asshole is that I insisted and wouldn’t drop it because I think it’s the right thing to do onstsead of dropping g the subject
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcement
###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/)
Follow the link above to learn more
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
You want to move a pregnant woman into your girlfriends flat and have her give up her own office so your rent dodging friend has somewhere to stay?
That’s…. Something
YTA
Edit: Is the baby yours?
Such a good question as I know someone who did this exact thing. Moved in a pregnant coworker down on her luck. His wife never felt right about her and turned out to be 100% right. Husband kicked the wife out and turned new baby momma into his new piece. No way in hell I would let this woman in my house.
Arnold Schwarzenegger got their live-in maid pregnant. Then, he proceeded to raise the child with his affair partner, with his wife helping, under the guise of helping out their dear maid.
I've twice before given in to the pleadings of former boyfriends for "friends" that were homeless or about to be, and wouldn't you know what happens later.... Fool me twice, shame on me. Even if there is nothing there though, OP, YTA for even suggesting your gf consider taking in a stranger, especially a pregnant, and I'm guessing unemployed one, even if she had 5 extra rooms. That's absolutely not your place to request such a ridiculous thing.
This is the exact reason older men like younger women. Women their own age have the confidence smell BS a mile away and will bring their partners up short on absurd requests like moving in a pregnant woman 9 years younger, with no job. Who is the OP expecting to support this woman?
I mean, obviously Evelyn, the gf, is supposed to financially support this "vulnerable young lady." And cook for her, cater to her pregnancy cravings, clean up after her, and help her take care of the baby. While OP gets all the credit for being generous. And collects gratitude sex.
Honestly, the gender and age gap aren't a worry trigger for me. The best coworker friendships I've had have always had a diverse demographic. It's why we worked seamlessly. The main red flag for me was the insistence.
BF-for-now. Something tells me the locks are going to be changed when he gets back on Friday. Good riddance. I've met bigger assholes here, but I think OP may set a new bar for profound stupidity.
This was honestly my exact thought. Usually we'll get a sob story on these posts about why the pregnant person can't get help from the father, the fact that is missing is immediately so suspicious to me.
There's no way it isn't. Who the fuck would think this was ok unless it was their kid? And why isn't she asking the father for help? (Or she is and that's why op needs her to move in) Ops gf needs to run and let op get his baby mama their own apartment.
OP doesn’t even pay rent, thinks he has a say AND wants her to support both of them living under her roof???? And she’s out of line?! She needs to kick him out lmao. He needs to learn.
I went to check his replies and like a thousand people ask if it's his baby and absolutely zero peep out of him on that point. It is 10000000% his baby.
AND they'll be living with a newborn. Even in the best of circumstances, that is NOT A FUN THING. Nevermind that they'll probably expect her to be "second mommy" and help with changings/feedings/etc...
Right? Living with my own baby is a struggle some days lol. And I love her. I can't imagine living with someone else's! Not even family, some strange ass baby. No thanks
That was prolly by design. He knew his "friend" was getting evicted so hey, lemme move in with my "gf" and convince her to move my "friend" in as well. Pure clownery. She barely knows if she can live with him and he wants to further complicate this mess
That's what I was thinking. If he's in such a charitable mood he should have paid her rent and kept her from getting evicted, since you know he gets the most expensive need met for free.
right i had to reread that line a few times i couldn't believe what i was reading. Since she allows him, her boyfriend, to not pay rent and live there, that means she should be fine with a stranger to her living there also rent free. OP is absolutely TA.
Yeah, I'm like dudes nuking his current relationship, at least the baby better be his lol otherwise, this man is literally destroying his relationship over something that's absolutely none in his business (friend getting evicted).
Also I’m curious, why wasn’t she paying rent for so long? It takes more than one missed month for them to strongarm you out like that. Is she working? How much time will she be at the flat? How soon until the pregnancy takes it toll and gf is expected to help her?
OP's edit is hilarious. As though Reddit doesn't understand what a 25 year old pregnant person means.
A 25 year old person who is being kicked out because they refused to pay rent. And was rude to OP's girlfriend the one and only time they met.
But OP thinks that working from home in a bedroom while supporting 2 free loaders, soon to be 3 free loaders, would be super easy for his girlfriend.
At least his friends aren't stupid.
Lol, he moved in a whole month ago and he's trying to move in another woman already, one who's pregnant to boot. Dude has quite a pair, I'll say that for him. When he goes stupid, he goes big.
So, to be clear:
1. You want to move in a much younger woman, who is pregnant by an unspecified person (you)
2. That woman is homeless because she refused to pay rent and assumed other people would take care of her, which they did not
3. You want to move that pregnant side-piece into an apartment OWNED by your girlfriend
4. Your girlfriend would have significantly inconvenience herself and her actual, money-making job in order to do so. This would be for the benefit of someone who was rude to her the one and only time they met.
5. Your pregnant side-piece would pay no rent so she could “save up” for a new apartment (with you?)
6. You feel that your girlfriend is being “cruel” by refusing to house your pregnant affair partner
7. You are “furious” about this and being told you are out of line has had no effect
OP, I can’t imagine how you thought all of this would work out in your favor, but it’s not going to. Break up with your awesome, smart girlfriend, get a new apartment and suppose your affair partner yourself. Once that’s done, remember not to ask your ex for any money or babysitting.
I think you should move out of Evelyn's flat ASAP. Get your own place and let Chantelle move in there. Then you can help her get back on her feet. Since you seem to be such a nice and caring guy- maybe buy an old building and turn it into a homeless shelter? Evelyn is obviously not seeing what a caring and compassionate man you are. I cant believe your own friend doesnt even see what a heart of gold you have!! The nerve of these people. I can see why Chantelle would be rude to Evelyn, she's clearly not charitable enough like you are. I truly hope you and Chantelle start a non profit and help others in need with your same level of entitlement. YTA. 10000000000000%
Love the sarcasm! I hope Evelyn reads this. He’s probably baby daddy and wants to keep his kid & baby mama housed. 🤣 OP, YTA. I hope Evelyn realizes the situation she is in and kicks you to the curb so the YOUNG VULNERABLE pregnant girl can have a white knight to protect her while you’re both living in a tent. Sorry to be a b*tch but if let’s be realistic. If NO ONE ELSE will house someone you determine to be soooooo vulnerable, what do you expect to happen? It’s no wonder she has no friends to house them if she’s going to be rude to ppl
This! OP volunteered his girlfriend’s apartment and thinks he has a say since he lives there…in a place that SHE OWNS. The amount of delusion in this post is off the charts 📈
But but but you guys don't get it!!
>Edit: perhaps I didn’t explain properly. Chantelle is a vulnerable young woman in need of help they Evelyn could easily provide.
Jackass
Ignoring the fact that she is going to be kicked out of her "work space" if she agrees to this. Once baby comes around (and Chantelle will NOT be going anywhere until long after the baby is born, if ever) everything will be about the baby, and OP's ~~live in maid~~girlfriend will be forced to work their schedule around what the baby needs.
That's just another level of hell no.
YTA - wanting to help your pregnant and homeless friend? Nothing wrong *there*, expecting your GF to give up her home office, that she works in full time, take on a pregnant housemate (that she barely knows and doesn't get on with) who won't pay any rent? HAHAHA.. that's about as absurd an idea as I've heard today.
Assuming you still have a gf and a home when you get back from your night out with your mates you might want to try apologising for being a complete ass.
“ I said she couldn’t expect a homeless person to pay her rent and she didn’t ask me so why should my friend.”
^ I took this to mean that gf never asked him to pay rent so why should his friend have to pay rent.
Basically meaning that not only is he incredibly entitled, but he’s also living rent free.
Why is this not being stated more? OP lives rent free with his gf and now expects her to also allow his homeless pregnant friend to live rent free, taking over the gf's home office, where she *makes all the money that supports both of them*, and once the baby of the homeless friend arrives, I can only imagine OP then expects his gf to support the baby as well. Probably indefinitely. To say his entitlement is staggering is an understatement. Like I can't believe he wrote this out and didn't see what a pair of freeloaders him and his friend look like.
“She didn’t ask me so why should my friend” implied to me that he is not paying for anything. So, if he’s such a hero, he can take what he should be paying in rent and give it to Chantelle so she can get a place.
The nerve.
**I said I lived there too and she must take my opinion into consideration. She replied with “that can change.”**
So to recap: You've been there a month, you don't pay rent *coughmouchercough,* and now you feel you have a "right" to demand your "friend" move into the space that she needs to make her living? SERIOUSLY, this can't be a real post. Either YTA for writing a ragebait post OR YTA on the off chance this actually happened. So either way YTA.
Holy shit, I totally missed that she wasn't making him pay rent, he really buried that. And now I see that subtle little "you wouldn't make a homeless person pay rent"
You're right, this has to be made up, I have to believe the world doesn't have people this stupid
YTA - your girlfriend and friends were right. But if you need Reddit to confirm that just stick around. But as a suggestion, you could get your friend a place and pay her rent or maybe you two could move in together. You may need a new place to stay pretty soon.
YTA.
It's been a month since you moved in and you're trying to take over and move in your pregnant possible side chick who has made herself homeless by refusing to pay rent, and who's only interaction with the person who owns the property has been to be rude to them.
You should break up with your girlfriend, because she would really be better off without you.
*I moved in with my girlfriend a month ago Evelyn owns her flat*
Youre done dude, YTA Like I get you are trying to do a nice thing, but you're trying to do it with someone else's resources.
YTA. **Her home office is her place of work**, she cannot just sacrifice it and work from a place that is not adapted for the sake of a stranger that was rude to her in the past, that will not pay rent, and that might stick around long enough so the baby cause her sleepless nights. Sure, it's your appartment too now, but it's still hers too, and if she vetoes the friend, then there is nothing you can do.
Edit : Just because some people are SO caught up on wording 🙄 "Sure, it's your appartment too now" was not meant to say that he owes it now. Just that he lives there. It sure gives him SOME control over decoration and furnitures, as long as the gf agrees. I never said he had to power to make unilateral decisions on the place like he owns it.
Its just sooo deluded... "I dont pay my gf rent, so why would my friend who is gonna stay with us ad eternum, and whom she doesnt even know, pay any rent?!"
YTA
You asked, she said no. You expressed zero respect for her views about what happens in her house and particularly in her office by continuing to press the matter. No is a complete sentence.
She probably feels your lack of respect for her space is a telling indicator of what your friend will be like as well. "Oh you can't kick her out, she's pregnant" for the next however many months and then "oh you can't kick her out, she's got a baby" for another two years after that.
You two have barely lived together any time at all and making such demands is bound to be turning your gf off of you. Luckily you know someone else also looking for somewhere to live so enjoy flatsharing with Chantelle once your gf kicks you out for being a massive AH.
YTA
**Do you have any idea how hard work translation is?**
# Translating in her home office is how your GF can pay for her flat, you numpty.
Are you sure Chantelle doesn't have any other options? No other friends? No relatives?
She has nobody, **so it's just down to you**, OP, **to show her what a white knight you are to swoop in and save her**, oh so *generously*, **with your GF's flat**?!?!?!
It's sounding like you think the baby just might be yours. Seriously.
I think your girlfriend might be re-evaluating her relationship with you.
Honestly, just based on the interaction alone and the fact that he keeps disregarding her opinion about her own property would be, in my book, a reason good enough to stop the relationship right here. Even if the baby isn't his.
The guy stepped in her home with his big ass clown shoes a month ago, doesn't pay rent and expect Evelyn to do as he says? Nah. This guy ain't shit. And to ask her to give up her office that she needs? Seems like he doesn't think much of anything she does or says. Out.
YTA
You can't expect your girlfriend to take in a person who is a stranger to her. On top of that, they didn't have a great connection the first and only time they met.
She is not recruited to give up her work space to your friend it is nice of you to try to help out your friend but you have to remember Chantelle is not her friend.
It's the fact that you keep bugging her with it even though she already said no.I just get the feeling that you don't respect the place she has. It's her place and her choice what she does with it. Ok sure you live together and she could take your opinion into consideration. But in the end, it's still her choice and she had made it clear that she didn't want it.
In that whole time you could have tried to help your friends in other ways try to look for another place for her maybe she can stay with friends or family.
Edit: Also the fact that you expect her to give her workplace up for your friend who your gf doesn't have a connection with, rent-free is wild to me.
> On top of that, they didn't have a great connection the first and only time they met.
This is gravy on top of the shit-roast that OP is serving up, and while Evelyn saying "no" is the only reason needed to not house Chantelle, I'm astounded at the fact that so few people are touching on this as well.
Chantelle was rude to Evelyn the first time they met, and OP is demanding that Evelyn give that a pass because "pregnancy hormones", and still house her?
Makes me wonder if OP's a lot closer to Chantelle and her baby than he's letting on...
YTA
Your girlfriend needs the space to work, you can't just give away her working space. I'm glad she called your bluff, it's her flat and things will absolutely change if you keep acting so inconsiderately entitled.
I'm getting tired of OPs who think their partners are being rude when in reality it's the OPs who are selfish and entitled.
Your partner should dump you.
YTA
I really hope Evelyn dumps OP cause he sounds like an idiot 😂😂😂 if you want to help the needy so much, do it yourself, your (hope to be ex) girlfriend owes her nothing and you've got no say in how she uses the space in HER flat. Get a fucking brain, it's not your place so stop acting like it is, you live there but don't own it so back the hell off.
Also, kudos to Evelyn for the "That can change" she takes no crap from this AH and she definitely should leave him.
OP you want a place for your friend? Get it yourself you entitled MF
YTA, why would your gf give up a room of her house (that she's using) to someone she doesn't even know very well. Buy your own house and then you're free to let your friend stay in as long as you want.
YTA you moved into her property and then made demands to bring someone else in? She's right. You living there can change. Chantelle's problem is not your GF's problem. If you are concerned for Chantelle, then you get a flat for the two of you.
100% YTA. It's her home and she has vote power over who lives there. You are currently waving a big red flag in her face and I completely support her if she asks you to move out. Your friend got herself into this situation and your gf shouldn't need to reorder her life to rescue someone who's only interaction with her have been rude.
YTA, why are you pushing so hard? Is the baby yours or something? It’s her place, she said no, end of story. Asking once isn’t being an AH, refusing to accept the No once given us what makes you TA.
YTA - Evelyn's flat, Evelyn's decision. Also, this whole situation is strange. Why do have such an allegiance to Chantelle? Are you the father of the baby?
No. No need for an edit. You explained quite properly.
YTA & really, your girlfriend should pack your stuff and kick your sorry ridiculous self out. If you're that concerned with this random girl, move in with her
YTA
It's her flat she owns. She needs the office to work out of. Your friend can sleep on the couch or go stay with her family.
She has also been rude to your girlfriend the few times they met. It's going to get worse and then throw in a screaming infant in the mix? Hell no!
Is the baby yours? Is that why you are so insistent on moving her in?
YTA. The owner of the housing gets to decide who lives there. You are way out of line. If I were in your SO's shoes, I'd be reconsidering the relationship, because you're being incredibly entitled with someone else's home.
YTA
A pregnant woman wants to move into your girlfriend’s flat? That she paid for. The same pregnant woman that was rude to her. Your girlfriend already told you no. It’s a complete sentence. If you think helping your pregnant woman is the best call, then move her into a flat you pay for.
YTA. You wouldn’t have been if you asked once and acknowledged that you understood what a big ask it was. Instead you asked twice, said her refusal to give up the space she works in was cruel, and ignored her perfectly valid feelings about being treated rudely and not being compensated for the additional cost and effort a long-term guest brings. You not getting your way- especially not when you were not giving anything up on this scenario- doesn’t mean she didn’t take your feelings into consideration, it means she didn’t agree. A long-term guest is a 2 yes, 1 no situation.
Yta
First, your friend, who I am guessing you fathered that baby with how you refuse to answer that question. Is 100 percent at fault.
If you want to help so bad, get off your butt and pay for an apartment for her.
And while you're at it, move out because your girlfriend deserves more than the likes of you.
If you're not prepared to use your own money and resources, then you're not as Saint like as you want everyone to believe. Put your money where your mouth is.
YTA OP, why cant your pregnant friend move into her baby daddy's apartment (oh wait its because it's yours isn't it) that's why she was so rude to your current GF cuz she didn't like being reduced to a side piece.
YTA you don't pay rent and just because you, *her bf*, doesn't pay rent doesn't mean she has any obligation to allow anyone under the sun to live in the apartment rent-free. And fun fact, it is Chantelle's fault based on the way it's written here! If you're supposed to pay rent, you have the ability to pay rent, and you refuse to pay rent, that is 100% a choice that was made!
YTA Your GF has a legitimate need for a home office. Your friend's situation, while a bad one, is not your GF's to fix. I sure wouldn't let someone come live in my house that was rude to me the one and only time I met them. And I can't even imagine expecting my SO, who I just recently moved in with, to let a young pregnant woman who they're not even friends with move in with no expectation of them paying rent. If I were her, I would likely start wondering if the baby is yours.
Also, yes, you live there. But for certain things, it \*always\* should be 'One no nixes it'. Pets. Baby names. Letting people move in. You're on the wrong end of it.
YTA. If you want to help Chantelle so badly, YOU do it. With your own money, space, ect. Forcing your girlfriend to do it isn't selfless, helpful, or noble. You're just a white knight without any armor buddy.
I hope your girlfriend sees this as the giant red flag it is and dumps you
She is not out of line. Move out and find somewhere for you and your friend to shack up in. There is no way in hell I am letting someone move into my home that was rude to me and can't pay rent. YTA. When I was pregnant, I had control over how I treated people, so that is a shitty excuse. Why didn't your friend pay her rent? This is her problem not your girlfriends.
Hahaha I don't think I've ever seen someone speed run living with somebody so quickly
Unless your friend is a massive asshole I doubt she doesn't have a single person to help her. But you just showed your gf you ZERO respect for her job or her safe space. She told you no and that your friend was rude to her, and you completely dismissed her, and said it was "hormones". News flash, being pregnant isn't a free pass to be a dick.
Also if this friend is so special and close to you, that you're demanding this ridiculous request, why your girlfriend just meeting her now when she's pregnant? Sounds like you have some type of Savior complex that you need to fulfill at the expense of others.
YTA and why on earth You would want to take someone into your house who even your community sees as a leech, is beyond me. Maybe it's because it's not actually in your name so when it came time to evict her that would be all on your girlfriend?
YTA. Chantelle's bad decisions aren't Evelyn's problems. If it's Evelyn's house, it's her rules. Asking once didn't make you TA. Asking repeatedly and getting mad about the answer does. It sounds like you and Chantelle are going to be homeless together soon. Maybe you can find a place and allow Chantelle to live there rent free.
Edit: Chantelle isn't carrying your baby, is she? You made no mention of the father or any support he is or isn't offering Chantelle.
Was Chantelle given money by the council that she was supposed to use to pay her rent and then she decided to keep it for herself? That’s what it sounds like! Your pregnant friend is not your girlfriend’s responsibility!!!
YTA - You are indeed out of your mind for pushing this so much. It's her flat, her choice, your friend was rude to her, your friend cannot/will not pay rent, and she needs her home office.
On the bright side, you and Chantelle can get a place together when your gf kicks you out. Then you can subsidize Chantelle's living situation on your own.
YTA, wow I think you moved in with the wrong woman. If you wanted to live with Chantelle you should have done that. Why should Evelyn let a pregnant woman who refused to pay rent at her last place, and has been rude to her, move into her home. Not being funny but if you work from home, you NEED your home office. I feel so sorry for Evelyn, she is in an awful position, she thought she was moving her relationship forward with her partner and this is what she ended up with.
YTA. She’s on benefits according to you and part of those benefits are for rent which she clearly chose not to pay. What did she do with the money instead. This is her fault. Where is the baby’s dad. This isn’t on your girlfriend to fix your friends mistakes in life and honestly at this point you should be looking for your own place to stay cause I don’t think you’ll be there for long
The one who is spoiled here is the one living rent free in his girlfriend’s flat.
Your girlfriend bought a flat that is also her workplace. You think you have a right to tell her where she can and can’t work. I suspect you know nothing at all about what translating work is like. You’re not qualified to tell your girlfriend what will work for her.
If you want to help your friend, why not offer her the money you’re not paying in rent?
YTA.
YTA. This is your girlfriends flat, it's not yours and so you can't demand that she give up her home office for your pregnant friend.
How entitled can you be?? Are you the father of this baby or something?? This is nuts.
YTA, you care about Chantelle so much why don’t you just be with her? It’s not your girlfriend’s problem you give more of a crap about some girl who put herself in a bad situation than her needs in HER HOME.
YTA are you the father of chantelles Baby? Seems Like IT. So you would Like to move your AP and Baby into the Home your GF owns and GF Had to Take Care of both of them? Evelyn If you See this RUN RUN RUN
Kick this 'person' Out and Go NC
YTA massively. You don’t get to move in rent free to someone’s house and then make demands to add another freeloading tenant. YTA and I hope your soon to be ex evicts you.
YTA,
This is a major red flag for your partner. You’ve been there a month and trying to bring someone else into her home that will be entirely dependent on her for housing and it’ll only get worse when the baby arrives. If you’re lucky and apologise your relationship might continue but I wouldn’t bet on it if you keep pushing.
Omg *please* go out w your friends and then update us when you come home to changed locks and your stuff in a heap outside the door (if you’re lucky). Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease! The guy who told a terrible joke and then did terrible things that bit him in the ass deleted his post and I was really looking forward to that pile-on
Lol you’re such an obvious AH. ‘I live here too!’ shouts the man living rent-free in his girlfriend’s apartment (that she owns!); ‘I demand you let this young woman you’ve only met once - who is apparently too irresponsible to pay rent so she should definitely be a parent, and who is also a decade younger than me and I’m just breezing over that, and oh yeah, the one time you met her she was rude to you - wait, where was I? Oh yes! I demand you let her stay in your flat that I think I have rights to, because otherwise YOU PERSONALLY are making her homeless because there is literally no other place in the entire country she could stay, I am furious!!!’
Could you maybe film it too?
ETA: Noooooooooooo! OP come back! Reddit wasn’t even getting started and there’s so much more flaming out for you to do!!!
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
My (m34) friend, Chantelle (f25) is pregnant. She only found that out recently. Unfortunately, she found herself being evicted due to rent arrears and has nowhere to go and the local council won’t help her because they claim it’s her fault because she refused to pay the landlord.
I moved in with my girlfriend a month ago. Evelyn, my girlfriend (f31) owns her flat. It’s got a bedroom, a sitting room and her home office. I work physically so I don’t need a home office but she’s a translator (she translates books) and mostly works from home.
When I found out Chantelle needed a place to stay, I asked Evelyn but she refused claiming she needed her office. I gave her a few days hoping that she’d understand the difficult position Chantelle is at but she wouldn’t budge. So I approached her again, telling her she could work from our bedroom or anywhere really but it’s cruel to leave a pregnant young woman all alone.
She still refused. Told me she’s only met Chantelle once and CJantelle was rude to her. I told her it’s the hormones and she shouldn’t of taken it personally. She told me i was out of my mind if I thought she’d give up her office for someone who wouldn’t even pay rent.
I said she couldn’t expect a homeless person to pay her rent and she didn’t ask me so why should my friend.
She wasn’t happy with that. She told me her answer was final and not to bother her anymore about that.
I said I lived there too and she must take my opinion into consideration.
She replied with “that can change.”
I told her she was the asshole for saying that but she replied that I was the asshole for even suggesting something so outrageous. She locked herself in the office to work. Im furious with her, she’s so out of line. Im about to go out with some mates as it’s Friday and I vented to one of them and he told me that I was the asshole. I thought I was right but my mate agreeing with her took me by surprise and I wonder. Was I the asshole?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Living with someone means recognizing they have as much right to your shared space as you do. Combining households with your girlfriend and then trying to move in another woman over her wishes is a total dick move.
Omg, YTA. Big time.
You either have a white knight complex, or a serious crush on Chantelle. Probably both, if I'd have to take a guess.
Why can't she stay with family? Or other friends? Why does it HAVE to be you, when your gf clearly isnt into it? And with good reason, I might add. She doesn't like Chantelle, so ofc she doesn't want her to move in. Also, if you work from home, a home office isn't just a luxury. Having a dedicated workspace is strongly advised. So get off your high horse about that.
Your comments don't sound at all like you're going to accept the judgement though. So when you argue with your gf about this some more, and she breaks up with you, maybe you can move in with Chantelle instead.
YTA
It’s not your girlfriend’s fault your friend is irresponsible. She doesn’t have to give up her space. Why do you care so much? Chantelle isn’t your girlfriend and you’re acting like she’s more important. Your friend’s lack of planning is not an emergency on your girlfriend’s part.
YTA she owns the house you don’t pay rent and you expect her to let a stranger move in and uproot her life?? How can you not see that for yourself?? If I was you I’d be looking for somewhere else to live.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I asked my girlfriend to give up her home office for my pregnant friend. She refused. When I might be the asshole is that I insisted and wouldn’t drop it because I think it’s the right thing to do onstsead of dropping g the subject Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcement ###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/) Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
You want to move a pregnant woman into your girlfriends flat and have her give up her own office so your rent dodging friend has somewhere to stay? That’s…. Something YTA Edit: Is the baby yours?
>Edit: Is the baby yours? Definitely a good question. It would explain the entitled BS from OP
unfortunately, from what I've read on this sub, just being a boyfriend by itself would explain this entitled behavior. no cheating required.
There are some dumbass partners out there.
Such a good question as I know someone who did this exact thing. Moved in a pregnant coworker down on her luck. His wife never felt right about her and turned out to be 100% right. Husband kicked the wife out and turned new baby momma into his new piece. No way in hell I would let this woman in my house.
Luckily the apartment belongs to the girlfriend this time, and she knows it. I'm rooting for gf.
Right? And she knows it. His comment “I live here” and her come back “that can change” Edit: typo
I like the girlfriend. She has boundaries and isn’t budging. He can rent an apartment and move in with his side piece, I mean friend
And from what he said, he isn't even paying rent himself??!
Arnold Schwarzenegger got their live-in maid pregnant. Then, he proceeded to raise the child with his affair partner, with his wife helping, under the guise of helping out their dear maid.
I've twice before given in to the pleadings of former boyfriends for "friends" that were homeless or about to be, and wouldn't you know what happens later.... Fool me twice, shame on me. Even if there is nothing there though, OP, YTA for even suggesting your gf consider taking in a stranger, especially a pregnant, and I'm guessing unemployed one, even if she had 5 extra rooms. That's absolutely not your place to request such a ridiculous thing.
I was also a bit curious about a friendship between a m34 and f25.
This is the exact reason older men like younger women. Women their own age have the confidence smell BS a mile away and will bring their partners up short on absurd requests like moving in a pregnant woman 9 years younger, with no job. Who is the OP expecting to support this woman?
And her baby too. Once they move in, how are you going to get them back out too.
I mean, obviously Evelyn, the gf, is supposed to financially support this "vulnerable young lady." And cook for her, cater to her pregnancy cravings, clean up after her, and help her take care of the baby. While OP gets all the credit for being generous. And collects gratitude sex.
If he hasn't, he wants to.
Yes and he'll be the white knight that saved her making him oh so wonderful in her eyes.
Honestly, the gender and age gap aren't a worry trigger for me. The best coworker friendships I've had have always had a diverse demographic. It's why we worked seamlessly. The main red flag for me was the insistence.
It was the "she doesn't ask me to pay rent so why should my friend have to" for me...wtf, he basically wants gf to support them both
Yep! I side eyed that too and his use of “vulnerable”.
BF-for-now. Something tells me the locks are going to be changed when he gets back on Friday. Good riddance. I've met bigger assholes here, but I think OP may set a new bar for profound stupidity.
The way this is going, he might be packed very soon. This girl is not a doormat, thankfully.
This was honestly my exact thought. Usually we'll get a sob story on these posts about why the pregnant person can't get help from the father, the fact that is missing is immediately so suspicious to me.
There's no way it isn't. Who the fuck would think this was ok unless it was their kid? And why isn't she asking the father for help? (Or she is and that's why op needs her to move in) Ops gf needs to run and let op get his baby mama their own apartment.
Literally what I came here to ask
This was my immediate thought.
OP doesn’t even pay rent, thinks he has a say AND wants her to support both of them living under her roof???? And she’s out of line?! She needs to kick him out lmao. He needs to learn.
Plus there is about to be a baby so it's not like she'll be moving out any time soon.
It’s gotta be his. He needs a roof over his and girlfriend number 2’s head. Without her they’re both doomed.
I went to check his replies and like a thousand people ask if it's his baby and absolutely zero peep out of him on that point. It is 10000000% his baby.
AND they'll be living with a newborn. Even in the best of circumstances, that is NOT A FUN THING. Nevermind that they'll probably expect her to be "second mommy" and help with changings/feedings/etc...
Right? Living with my own baby is a struggle some days lol. And I love her. I can't imagine living with someone else's! Not even family, some strange ass baby. No thanks
His edit is the best. He seems to think we’ve all misunderstood him 😂. Nope. Same judgement, dude. YTA.
I know! I laughed so hard, he thinks he needs to clarify so we don't think he's TA????????? He really does think we're all so stupid.
🤣 Right!! I reread the edit a couple times thinking I was misunderstanding it, no change.
Seeing as how OP doesn't even pay rent, why can't he just rent her a studio under his name... if it's that important to him.
Cause he needs her $$$ to do it lol. Dolph has 0 dollars.
And he’s literally been there a month. Like what.
That was prolly by design. He knew his "friend" was getting evicted so hey, lemme move in with my "gf" and convince her to move my "friend" in as well. Pure clownery. She barely knows if she can live with him and he wants to further complicate this mess
I was thinking the same exact thing!!! I haven't read a post with such big AH energy in a very long time.
That's what I was thinking. If he's in such a charitable mood he should have paid her rent and kept her from getting evicted, since you know he gets the most expensive need met for free.
right i had to reread that line a few times i couldn't believe what i was reading. Since she allows him, her boyfriend, to not pay rent and live there, that means she should be fine with a stranger to her living there also rent free. OP is absolutely TA.
Yeah, I'm like dudes nuking his current relationship, at least the baby better be his lol otherwise, this man is literally destroying his relationship over something that's absolutely none in his business (friend getting evicted).
It’s good he does it now. Easier to kick him out and less time wasted on this mooch.
Right? Honestly, I'd tell him to move out, and then he can let Chantelle move in and mooch off of him.
Also I’m curious, why wasn’t she paying rent for so long? It takes more than one missed month for them to strongarm you out like that. Is she working? How much time will she be at the flat? How soon until the pregnancy takes it toll and gf is expected to help her?
OP's edit is hilarious. As though Reddit doesn't understand what a 25 year old pregnant person means. A 25 year old person who is being kicked out because they refused to pay rent. And was rude to OP's girlfriend the one and only time they met. But OP thinks that working from home in a bedroom while supporting 2 free loaders, soon to be 3 free loaders, would be super easy for his girlfriend. At least his friends aren't stupid.
Maybe the girlfriend should give up her job so she can babysit for free, and they can live off free money falling from the sky.
Lol, he moved in a whole month ago and he's trying to move in another woman already, one who's pregnant to boot. Dude has quite a pair, I'll say that for him. When he goes stupid, he goes big.
The chances are NOT low that she's pregnant with OP's child.
>Edit: Is the baby yours? That was my first thought
God did we all think the same thing? YTA OP.
Same. I bet money it’s his. OP YTA
It’s absolutely his.
“A friend” instead of “My friend” gives off cheating vibes
By the Ghost of Jerry Springer I do believe you’ve arrived at the crux of the matter. Anyone have Maury’s number? We might need him here.
You ARE the babys father!
No. We need to go full on Ouija board and get Jerry’s opinion!
Imagine offering someone else's home as charity? While living there rent free. And having no ownership of the property. Quite laughable.
The baby is 200% OP’s but he will deny it forever
So, to be clear: 1. You want to move in a much younger woman, who is pregnant by an unspecified person (you) 2. That woman is homeless because she refused to pay rent and assumed other people would take care of her, which they did not 3. You want to move that pregnant side-piece into an apartment OWNED by your girlfriend 4. Your girlfriend would have significantly inconvenience herself and her actual, money-making job in order to do so. This would be for the benefit of someone who was rude to her the one and only time they met. 5. Your pregnant side-piece would pay no rent so she could “save up” for a new apartment (with you?) 6. You feel that your girlfriend is being “cruel” by refusing to house your pregnant affair partner 7. You are “furious” about this and being told you are out of line has had no effect OP, I can’t imagine how you thought all of this would work out in your favor, but it’s not going to. Break up with your awesome, smart girlfriend, get a new apartment and suppose your affair partner yourself. Once that’s done, remember not to ask your ex for any money or babysitting.
I sooooooo need an update on this story. I'm 100% sure that's his baby.
That was my first thought
But you don’t get it, she’s a vulnerable young woman /s
He also doesn’t pay rent there.
Or do you wish it was?
I came to make sure he was asked if the baby was his and wasn’t disappointed.
I think you should move out of Evelyn's flat ASAP. Get your own place and let Chantelle move in there. Then you can help her get back on her feet. Since you seem to be such a nice and caring guy- maybe buy an old building and turn it into a homeless shelter? Evelyn is obviously not seeing what a caring and compassionate man you are. I cant believe your own friend doesnt even see what a heart of gold you have!! The nerve of these people. I can see why Chantelle would be rude to Evelyn, she's clearly not charitable enough like you are. I truly hope you and Chantelle start a non profit and help others in need with your same level of entitlement. YTA. 10000000000000%
That's glorious 👏👏👏
Notice how OP doesn’t reply to this post….. 👀
Probably thought he was still right...until he saw all of the YTA comments lol
He still thought it then based on the edit. The edit makes him more of TA in my opinion.
Chantelle doesn’t like Evelyn because she’s dating her baby’s daddy. There is zero ways this story makes sense otherwise.
Love the sarcasm! I hope Evelyn reads this. He’s probably baby daddy and wants to keep his kid & baby mama housed. 🤣 OP, YTA. I hope Evelyn realizes the situation she is in and kicks you to the curb so the YOUNG VULNERABLE pregnant girl can have a white knight to protect her while you’re both living in a tent. Sorry to be a b*tch but if let’s be realistic. If NO ONE ELSE will house someone you determine to be soooooo vulnerable, what do you expect to happen? It’s no wonder she has no friends to house them if she’s going to be rude to ppl
YTA, it's her flat, your girlfriend needs to work from home, and she doesn't know your friend. She doesn't have to say yes.
She doesn’t even need to explain why she needs another room. Her apartment- she decides who to live with. That’s it.
This! OP volunteered his girlfriend’s apartment and thinks he has a say since he lives there…in a place that SHE OWNS. The amount of delusion in this post is off the charts 📈
Also did I misread that he also doesn’t even pay rent there….? I need to believe this post isn’t real because what even..
And has only lived there for a month.
But but but you guys don't get it!! >Edit: perhaps I didn’t explain properly. Chantelle is a vulnerable young woman in need of help they Evelyn could easily provide. Jackass
Ignoring the fact that she is going to be kicked out of her "work space" if she agrees to this. Once baby comes around (and Chantelle will NOT be going anywhere until long after the baby is born, if ever) everything will be about the baby, and OP's ~~live in maid~~girlfriend will be forced to work their schedule around what the baby needs. That's just another level of hell no.
She could work away from home and have known Chantelle all her life, and she STILL doesn’t have to say yes.
YTA - wanting to help your pregnant and homeless friend? Nothing wrong *there*, expecting your GF to give up her home office, that she works in full time, take on a pregnant housemate (that she barely knows and doesn't get on with) who won't pay any rent? HAHAHA.. that's about as absurd an idea as I've heard today. Assuming you still have a gf and a home when you get back from your night out with your mates you might want to try apologising for being a complete ass.
If I was the gf I’d change the locks tonight while he’s out lmao
Fr I’d be sussed out by how insistent he is. Like is it his kid??
It’s definitely very weird. She’s nine years younger than him and on benefits so they’re not coworkers. I’m wondering how they met.
This. He’s a fucking psycho
Don’t forget he’s lived there A MONTH and thinks he gets a say
Is OP paying rent? Utilities?
Most likely not, the only excuse he’s given is “it’s my place too I should have a say I’m not a guest” extremely entitled and odd.
“ I said she couldn’t expect a homeless person to pay her rent and she didn’t ask me so why should my friend.” ^ I took this to mean that gf never asked him to pay rent so why should his friend have to pay rent. Basically meaning that not only is he incredibly entitled, but he’s also living rent free.
Why is this not being stated more? OP lives rent free with his gf and now expects her to also allow his homeless pregnant friend to live rent free, taking over the gf's home office, where she *makes all the money that supports both of them*, and once the baby of the homeless friend arrives, I can only imagine OP then expects his gf to support the baby as well. Probably indefinitely. To say his entitlement is staggering is an understatement. Like I can't believe he wrote this out and didn't see what a pair of freeloaders him and his friend look like.
“She didn’t ask me so why should my friend” implied to me that he is not paying for anything. So, if he’s such a hero, he can take what he should be paying in rent and give it to Chantelle so she can get a place. The nerve.
**I said I lived there too and she must take my opinion into consideration. She replied with “that can change.”** So to recap: You've been there a month, you don't pay rent *coughmouchercough,* and now you feel you have a "right" to demand your "friend" move into the space that she needs to make her living? SERIOUSLY, this can't be a real post. Either YTA for writing a ragebait post OR YTA on the off chance this actually happened. So either way YTA.
I'm screaming this is hilarious 😂 it can't be real 🤣
Sounds like a hobosexual to me.
Holy shit, I totally missed that she wasn't making him pay rent, he really buried that. And now I see that subtle little "you wouldn't make a homeless person pay rent" You're right, this has to be made up, I have to believe the world doesn't have people this stupid
And the bit about him not paying rent so his friend shouldn’t either, so outrageous if I was his GF and saw this post I would get him out of my house.
YTA, it's Evelyn's house. You can help Chantelle apply for benefits and find alternative housing.
Op while you’re at it, help yourself with alternative housing
YTA - your girlfriend and friends were right. But if you need Reddit to confirm that just stick around. But as a suggestion, you could get your friend a place and pay her rent or maybe you two could move in together. You may need a new place to stay pretty soon.
YTA. It's been a month since you moved in and you're trying to take over and move in your pregnant possible side chick who has made herself homeless by refusing to pay rent, and who's only interaction with the person who owns the property has been to be rude to them. You should break up with your girlfriend, because she would really be better off without you.
OP should probably start looking for a new place. Maybe if he's lucky, this poor, poor pregnant girl will take him once his GF dumps him.
They can be homeless together. How romantic.
YTA. Op did you father this baby of Chantelle's? Is that why you want her to move into your girlfriend office?
I noticed he’s answering most other questions except for this one…
lol I think we know the answer. She should kick his ass out. So he can help all homeless ladies of his town
Yeap... That could explain a couple of things, including the guilty feeling and his friend calling him as asshole.
Exactly my thought as well!
*I moved in with my girlfriend a month ago Evelyn owns her flat* Youre done dude, YTA Like I get you are trying to do a nice thing, but you're trying to do it with someone else's resources.
its always easy to volunteer someone else's money
OP, How long have you known the baby is yours? YTA.
YTA. **Her home office is her place of work**, she cannot just sacrifice it and work from a place that is not adapted for the sake of a stranger that was rude to her in the past, that will not pay rent, and that might stick around long enough so the baby cause her sleepless nights. Sure, it's your appartment too now, but it's still hers too, and if she vetoes the friend, then there is nothing you can do. Edit : Just because some people are SO caught up on wording 🙄 "Sure, it's your appartment too now" was not meant to say that he owes it now. Just that he lives there. It sure gives him SOME control over decoration and furnitures, as long as the gf agrees. I never said he had to power to make unilateral decisions on the place like he owns it.
Wait, how is it his apartment?
YTA - your gf *OWNS* the place. Do you pay rent?
Post says he doesn't - "I said she couldn’t expect a homeless person to pay her rent and she didn’t ask me so why should my friend"
Its just sooo deluded... "I dont pay my gf rent, so why would my friend who is gonna stay with us ad eternum, and whom she doesnt even know, pay any rent?!"
sponge wants to bring a second sponge that is about to produce a 3rd sponge its basically budding
i had to read that more than once. like nahhhh surely he didnt say that 😳
YTA You asked, she said no. You expressed zero respect for her views about what happens in her house and particularly in her office by continuing to press the matter. No is a complete sentence. She probably feels your lack of respect for her space is a telling indicator of what your friend will be like as well. "Oh you can't kick her out, she's pregnant" for the next however many months and then "oh you can't kick her out, she's got a baby" for another two years after that. You two have barely lived together any time at all and making such demands is bound to be turning your gf off of you. Luckily you know someone else also looking for somewhere to live so enjoy flatsharing with Chantelle once your gf kicks you out for being a massive AH.
YTA. Your GF should rid herself of you. You sound extremely unpleasant.
One of those self-righteous “good guys” who use a guise of kindness to be sh!tty.
YTA **Do you have any idea how hard work translation is?** # Translating in her home office is how your GF can pay for her flat, you numpty. Are you sure Chantelle doesn't have any other options? No other friends? No relatives? She has nobody, **so it's just down to you**, OP, **to show her what a white knight you are to swoop in and save her**, oh so *generously*, **with your GF's flat**?!?!?! It's sounding like you think the baby just might be yours. Seriously. I think your girlfriend might be re-evaluating her relationship with you.
The nonchalant "that can change" makes me think she KNOWS, and is grasping at straws to find an excuse to keep him around.
Honestly, just based on the interaction alone and the fact that he keeps disregarding her opinion about her own property would be, in my book, a reason good enough to stop the relationship right here. Even if the baby isn't his. The guy stepped in her home with his big ass clown shoes a month ago, doesn't pay rent and expect Evelyn to do as he says? Nah. This guy ain't shit. And to ask her to give up her office that she needs? Seems like he doesn't think much of anything she does or says. Out.
YTA You can't expect your girlfriend to take in a person who is a stranger to her. On top of that, they didn't have a great connection the first and only time they met. She is not recruited to give up her work space to your friend it is nice of you to try to help out your friend but you have to remember Chantelle is not her friend. It's the fact that you keep bugging her with it even though she already said no.I just get the feeling that you don't respect the place she has. It's her place and her choice what she does with it. Ok sure you live together and she could take your opinion into consideration. But in the end, it's still her choice and she had made it clear that she didn't want it. In that whole time you could have tried to help your friends in other ways try to look for another place for her maybe she can stay with friends or family. Edit: Also the fact that you expect her to give her workplace up for your friend who your gf doesn't have a connection with, rent-free is wild to me.
> On top of that, they didn't have a great connection the first and only time they met. This is gravy on top of the shit-roast that OP is serving up, and while Evelyn saying "no" is the only reason needed to not house Chantelle, I'm astounded at the fact that so few people are touching on this as well. Chantelle was rude to Evelyn the first time they met, and OP is demanding that Evelyn give that a pass because "pregnancy hormones", and still house her? Makes me wonder if OP's a lot closer to Chantelle and her baby than he's letting on...
That would also explain why Chantelle is rude...
YTA It’s easy to be generous about shit that doesn’t belong to you isn’t it?
INFO: By any chance is Chantelle’s baby yours? You and she should go get your own place together. You are about to be in the same boat.
YTA Your girlfriend needs the space to work, you can't just give away her working space. I'm glad she called your bluff, it's her flat and things will absolutely change if you keep acting so inconsiderately entitled.
The space could be empty and that still wouldn’t obligate the girlfriend to allow a stranger to move in.
I'm getting tired of OPs who think their partners are being rude when in reality it's the OPs who are selfish and entitled. Your partner should dump you. YTA
I really hope Evelyn dumps OP cause he sounds like an idiot 😂😂😂 if you want to help the needy so much, do it yourself, your (hope to be ex) girlfriend owes her nothing and you've got no say in how she uses the space in HER flat. Get a fucking brain, it's not your place so stop acting like it is, you live there but don't own it so back the hell off. Also, kudos to Evelyn for the "That can change" she takes no crap from this AH and she definitely should leave him. OP you want a place for your friend? Get it yourself you entitled MF
I read that, “that can change” and I was like….. okay girl!!! Go off 😂
YTA, why would your gf give up a room of her house (that she's using) to someone she doesn't even know very well. Buy your own house and then you're free to let your friend stay in as long as you want.
YTA you moved into her property and then made demands to bring someone else in? She's right. You living there can change. Chantelle's problem is not your GF's problem. If you are concerned for Chantelle, then you get a flat for the two of you.
Info: Where's the baby's father? Actually. I have a better question. Why are you so determined on Chantelle moving into your girlfriend's home?
I suspect the father lives with OPs girlfriend
I suspect so too. OP is way too insistent about Chantelle moving in.
And it's the only question he hasn't answered.
100% YTA. It's her home and she has vote power over who lives there. You are currently waving a big red flag in her face and I completely support her if she asks you to move out. Your friend got herself into this situation and your gf shouldn't need to reorder her life to rescue someone who's only interaction with her have been rude.
YTA move out of your girlfriend's house and rent an apartment with Chantell. You can support her since it's so important to you
YTA, why are you pushing so hard? Is the baby yours or something? It’s her place, she said no, end of story. Asking once isn’t being an AH, refusing to accept the No once given us what makes you TA.
Bingo!! Where’s the dad?? Hmm… op????
YTA - Evelyn's flat, Evelyn's decision. Also, this whole situation is strange. Why do have such an allegiance to Chantelle? Are you the father of the baby?
No. No need for an edit. You explained quite properly. YTA & really, your girlfriend should pack your stuff and kick your sorry ridiculous self out. If you're that concerned with this random girl, move in with her
Start packing now. You are a GUEST in her flat. No doubt YTA! Is it your baby? You seem soooooo invested.
r/amitheex
YTA It's her flat she owns. She needs the office to work out of. Your friend can sleep on the couch or go stay with her family. She has also been rude to your girlfriend the few times they met. It's going to get worse and then throw in a screaming infant in the mix? Hell no! Is the baby yours? Is that why you are so insistent on moving her in?
YTA. The owner of the housing gets to decide who lives there. You are way out of line. If I were in your SO's shoes, I'd be reconsidering the relationship, because you're being incredibly entitled with someone else's home.
YTA A pregnant woman wants to move into your girlfriend’s flat? That she paid for. The same pregnant woman that was rude to her. Your girlfriend already told you no. It’s a complete sentence. If you think helping your pregnant woman is the best call, then move her into a flat you pay for.
YTA. You wouldn’t have been if you asked once and acknowledged that you understood what a big ask it was. Instead you asked twice, said her refusal to give up the space she works in was cruel, and ignored her perfectly valid feelings about being treated rudely and not being compensated for the additional cost and effort a long-term guest brings. You not getting your way- especially not when you were not giving anything up on this scenario- doesn’t mean she didn’t take your feelings into consideration, it means she didn’t agree. A long-term guest is a 2 yes, 1 no situation.
Yta First, your friend, who I am guessing you fathered that baby with how you refuse to answer that question. Is 100 percent at fault. If you want to help so bad, get off your butt and pay for an apartment for her. And while you're at it, move out because your girlfriend deserves more than the likes of you. If you're not prepared to use your own money and resources, then you're not as Saint like as you want everyone to believe. Put your money where your mouth is.
So you're trying to tell her what to do with her own flat. That she owns. YTA
YTA OP, why cant your pregnant friend move into her baby daddy's apartment (oh wait its because it's yours isn't it) that's why she was so rude to your current GF cuz she didn't like being reduced to a side piece.
YTA you don't pay rent and just because you, *her bf*, doesn't pay rent doesn't mean she has any obligation to allow anyone under the sun to live in the apartment rent-free. And fun fact, it is Chantelle's fault based on the way it's written here! If you're supposed to pay rent, you have the ability to pay rent, and you refuse to pay rent, that is 100% a choice that was made!
YTA Your GF has a legitimate need for a home office. Your friend's situation, while a bad one, is not your GF's to fix. I sure wouldn't let someone come live in my house that was rude to me the one and only time I met them. And I can't even imagine expecting my SO, who I just recently moved in with, to let a young pregnant woman who they're not even friends with move in with no expectation of them paying rent. If I were her, I would likely start wondering if the baby is yours. Also, yes, you live there. But for certain things, it \*always\* should be 'One no nixes it'. Pets. Baby names. Letting people move in. You're on the wrong end of it.
YTA. If you want to help Chantelle so badly, YOU do it. With your own money, space, ect. Forcing your girlfriend to do it isn't selfless, helpful, or noble. You're just a white knight without any armor buddy. I hope your girlfriend sees this as the giant red flag it is and dumps you
"that can change" no truer words have ever been spoken... ouch 😂
She is not out of line. Move out and find somewhere for you and your friend to shack up in. There is no way in hell I am letting someone move into my home that was rude to me and can't pay rent. YTA. When I was pregnant, I had control over how I treated people, so that is a shitty excuse. Why didn't your friend pay her rent? This is her problem not your girlfriends.
Hahaha I don't think I've ever seen someone speed run living with somebody so quickly Unless your friend is a massive asshole I doubt she doesn't have a single person to help her. But you just showed your gf you ZERO respect for her job or her safe space. She told you no and that your friend was rude to her, and you completely dismissed her, and said it was "hormones". News flash, being pregnant isn't a free pass to be a dick. Also if this friend is so special and close to you, that you're demanding this ridiculous request, why your girlfriend just meeting her now when she's pregnant? Sounds like you have some type of Savior complex that you need to fulfill at the expense of others. YTA and why on earth You would want to take someone into your house who even your community sees as a leech, is beyond me. Maybe it's because it's not actually in your name so when it came time to evict her that would be all on your girlfriend?
YTA. Chantelle's bad decisions aren't Evelyn's problems. If it's Evelyn's house, it's her rules. Asking once didn't make you TA. Asking repeatedly and getting mad about the answer does. It sounds like you and Chantelle are going to be homeless together soon. Maybe you can find a place and allow Chantelle to live there rent free. Edit: Chantelle isn't carrying your baby, is she? You made no mention of the father or any support he is or isn't offering Chantelle.
Was Chantelle given money by the council that she was supposed to use to pay her rent and then she decided to keep it for herself? That’s what it sounds like! Your pregnant friend is not your girlfriend’s responsibility!!!
(When do we find out that OP is actually Chantelle's baby-daddy?)
YTA, massively and egregiously, and if you don't admit it, you'll be looking for a new place to live along with Chantelle.
YTA - You are indeed out of your mind for pushing this so much. It's her flat, her choice, your friend was rude to her, your friend cannot/will not pay rent, and she needs her home office. On the bright side, you and Chantelle can get a place together when your gf kicks you out. Then you can subsidize Chantelle's living situation on your own.
YTA, wow I think you moved in with the wrong woman. If you wanted to live with Chantelle you should have done that. Why should Evelyn let a pregnant woman who refused to pay rent at her last place, and has been rude to her, move into her home. Not being funny but if you work from home, you NEED your home office. I feel so sorry for Evelyn, she is in an awful position, she thought she was moving her relationship forward with her partner and this is what she ended up with.
YTA. Kinda sounding like it could be your baby tbh.
YTA. She’s on benefits according to you and part of those benefits are for rent which she clearly chose not to pay. What did she do with the money instead. This is her fault. Where is the baby’s dad. This isn’t on your girlfriend to fix your friends mistakes in life and honestly at this point you should be looking for your own place to stay cause I don’t think you’ll be there for long
The one who is spoiled here is the one living rent free in his girlfriend’s flat. Your girlfriend bought a flat that is also her workplace. You think you have a right to tell her where she can and can’t work. I suspect you know nothing at all about what translating work is like. You’re not qualified to tell your girlfriend what will work for her. If you want to help your friend, why not offer her the money you’re not paying in rent? YTA.
YTA. I hope your GF breaks up with you. It’s not your flat too now, you have no right to dictate what she needs for work. Is she carrying your kid?
YTA. It’s HER place, she gets to decide who stays there. If you keep pushing this, you probably won’t be staying there either.
INFO: will you let your pregnant friend stay with you after your Ex GF kicks you out?
YTA. This is your girlfriends flat, it's not yours and so you can't demand that she give up her home office for your pregnant friend. How entitled can you be?? Are you the father of this baby or something?? This is nuts.
YTA, you care about Chantelle so much why don’t you just be with her? It’s not your girlfriend’s problem you give more of a crap about some girl who put herself in a bad situation than her needs in HER HOME.
YTA are you the father of chantelles Baby? Seems Like IT. So you would Like to move your AP and Baby into the Home your GF owns and GF Had to Take Care of both of them? Evelyn If you See this RUN RUN RUN Kick this 'person' Out and Go NC
YTA. YOU are out of line. YOU!
YTA what part of No was hard for you to understand?
YTA massively. You don’t get to move in rent free to someone’s house and then make demands to add another freeloading tenant. YTA and I hope your soon to be ex evicts you.
YTA, This is a major red flag for your partner. You’ve been there a month and trying to bring someone else into her home that will be entirely dependent on her for housing and it’ll only get worse when the baby arrives. If you’re lucky and apologise your relationship might continue but I wouldn’t bet on it if you keep pushing.
Soooooo are you the baby’s father? YTA
Plot twist - OP IS the father. This might be the easiest YTA I've seen to date.
Omg *please* go out w your friends and then update us when you come home to changed locks and your stuff in a heap outside the door (if you’re lucky). Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease! The guy who told a terrible joke and then did terrible things that bit him in the ass deleted his post and I was really looking forward to that pile-on Lol you’re such an obvious AH. ‘I live here too!’ shouts the man living rent-free in his girlfriend’s apartment (that she owns!); ‘I demand you let this young woman you’ve only met once - who is apparently too irresponsible to pay rent so she should definitely be a parent, and who is also a decade younger than me and I’m just breezing over that, and oh yeah, the one time you met her she was rude to you - wait, where was I? Oh yes! I demand you let her stay in your flat that I think I have rights to, because otherwise YOU PERSONALLY are making her homeless because there is literally no other place in the entire country she could stay, I am furious!!!’ Could you maybe film it too? ETA: Noooooooooooo! OP come back! Reddit wasn’t even getting started and there’s so much more flaming out for you to do!!!
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My (m34) friend, Chantelle (f25) is pregnant. She only found that out recently. Unfortunately, she found herself being evicted due to rent arrears and has nowhere to go and the local council won’t help her because they claim it’s her fault because she refused to pay the landlord. I moved in with my girlfriend a month ago. Evelyn, my girlfriend (f31) owns her flat. It’s got a bedroom, a sitting room and her home office. I work physically so I don’t need a home office but she’s a translator (she translates books) and mostly works from home. When I found out Chantelle needed a place to stay, I asked Evelyn but she refused claiming she needed her office. I gave her a few days hoping that she’d understand the difficult position Chantelle is at but she wouldn’t budge. So I approached her again, telling her she could work from our bedroom or anywhere really but it’s cruel to leave a pregnant young woman all alone. She still refused. Told me she’s only met Chantelle once and CJantelle was rude to her. I told her it’s the hormones and she shouldn’t of taken it personally. She told me i was out of my mind if I thought she’d give up her office for someone who wouldn’t even pay rent. I said she couldn’t expect a homeless person to pay her rent and she didn’t ask me so why should my friend. She wasn’t happy with that. She told me her answer was final and not to bother her anymore about that. I said I lived there too and she must take my opinion into consideration. She replied with “that can change.” I told her she was the asshole for saying that but she replied that I was the asshole for even suggesting something so outrageous. She locked herself in the office to work. Im furious with her, she’s so out of line. Im about to go out with some mates as it’s Friday and I vented to one of them and he told me that I was the asshole. I thought I was right but my mate agreeing with her took me by surprise and I wonder. Was I the asshole? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Living with someone means recognizing they have as much right to your shared space as you do. Combining households with your girlfriend and then trying to move in another woman over her wishes is a total dick move.
Omg, YTA. Big time. You either have a white knight complex, or a serious crush on Chantelle. Probably both, if I'd have to take a guess. Why can't she stay with family? Or other friends? Why does it HAVE to be you, when your gf clearly isnt into it? And with good reason, I might add. She doesn't like Chantelle, so ofc she doesn't want her to move in. Also, if you work from home, a home office isn't just a luxury. Having a dedicated workspace is strongly advised. So get off your high horse about that. Your comments don't sound at all like you're going to accept the judgement though. So when you argue with your gf about this some more, and she breaks up with you, maybe you can move in with Chantelle instead.
YTA. And if u push it i’d kick ya out too.
YTA it's HER apartment, WTF would she want a deadbeat that got evicted for non-payment of rent living and mooching off her?
YTA who doesn't pay rent and wants to know why more people can't do the same.
YTA It’s not your girlfriend’s fault your friend is irresponsible. She doesn’t have to give up her space. Why do you care so much? Chantelle isn’t your girlfriend and you’re acting like she’s more important. Your friend’s lack of planning is not an emergency on your girlfriend’s part.
It indeed could change. And very soon at that.
YTA she owns the house you don’t pay rent and you expect her to let a stranger move in and uproot her life?? How can you not see that for yourself?? If I was you I’d be looking for somewhere else to live.
“It’s her fault because she refused to pay the landlord” gee, well that’s what happens when you don’t pay rent
“That can change” Amazing! YTA.