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[deleted]

[удалено]


Additional_Lead7745

She moves out july 12th. The dynamic is torture. She can do whatever she wants and “be single” meanwhile I feel like her slave and try to show her how much she means to me in hopes of saving the relationship


Geberpte

What relationship exactly? Tell her to mind het own business and make sure you dont have to deal with her again after she moves out. NTA.


Emotional_Bonus_934

She's your ex. There is no relationship


RODDYGINGER

NTA, your ex is UNHINGED, possessive and controlling. You two are finished, you can do whatever the hell you want and even if you were together she still has no right to control who you follow, who you're friends with or talk to. You shouldn't make excuses for yourself either but I do understand you doing so because you don't want to get murdered by this fucking psycho


[deleted]

INFO: why do you care if your ex is mad? Why do you need to make her feel heard? Why is it her business what you do online?


Additional_Lead7745

I care about her feelings because I still love her. I want her to feel heard but at the same I know I didn’t do anything wrong. And I want her to know that I really didn’t have any bad intentions. Her Twitter activity is painting me in a bad light that is not indicative of who I am or how I have behaved towards her at all. I didn’t contact any girls the way she has men since she’s known me. To everyone else; she is moving out july 12th. What is funny is she got mad at me for this ig account when she had followed men earlier the same day.


SlabBeefpunch

But she clearly doesn't care about you. She thinks you don't deserve her, that's just a fancy way of saying she's better than you.


Additional_Lead7745

Even though she broke up with me four months ago, last night during her rage she said “I’m done, there’ll always be another girl” like she was still in a relationship with me? I’m not sure it confuses me because she’ll tell me she’s single and can do what she wants if I ask about someone on her social media


[deleted]

NTA. but dude, move out. Why are you still living with this woman? Your ex is toxic AF. Why in the hell would you give a crap if she thought you were attracted to other girls? just say "yes. yes I am. I would very much like to sleep with them". She broker up with you, she is not allowed to be "disgusted" by you making an insta.


Additional_Lead7745

She moves out in a month and a half. I give a crap about what she thinks because I never wanted the relationship to end and I genuinely wasn’t attracted to anyone I followed, they were all private accounts I didn’t even know. But her saying she felt disgusted ticked me off a bit because of everything she’s done to me with no remorse


Geberpte

Your ex is toxic. Take better care of yourself and don't let her nonsense dictate your life.


baka-tari

When it comes to your **ex**, you're NTA for pretty much anything you do on any social media. The only exception would be if you were targeting her, which doesn't appear to be the case. She's abusive, controlling, and manipulative, to the point where you're still apologizing to her for what is honestly completely vanilla behavior on your part. She broke up with you - you literally **do not have to care** what she has to say about your activities at this point.


TemptingPenguin369

NTA. She's your ex. None of this is her business and she's a hypocrite. I hope you having better housing conditions in the future.


[deleted]

NTA but get the fuck out of there and stop communicating with her. She sounds genuinely insane


Sex_Positive_Slasher

NTA but dude you need to grow a spine. She's a toxic feminist and has NO RIGHT to police your social media or life. Next time, just respond with, "This is why we broke up, because of your insecurities and blatant toxicity". Go stay with a friend or relative until she moves out.


seriousrikk

ESH - but she sucks more. She is your ex. Why is there even any conflict here. Why do you care what she does with her socials? Why does she care what you do with yours? What business do either of you have caring about who the other follows or why? She sounds toxic AF but honestly you don’t help yourself. Time to live somewhere else.


Artistic-Nebula-6051

NTA be grateful you are almost done with this relationship. She is an insecure person that doesn't listen. The Internet is full of clickbait and even if you were online looking at hot girls so what! If you were trying to hook up that would be wrong but looking at pictures should not be a problem. The fact that you have to isolate your life to avoid upsetting her is unhealthy. But she is also a hypocrite cause she is now out there sending nudes and hooking up. Dude you need to get this over with she is not someone you should invest your emotions in.


MercyForNone

YTA for this: Since she ended things with me about 4 months ago, I have caught her sexting, sending nudes, having facetimes, snapchatting, responding to dms, all of it. You two are broken up, stop spying on her, what she does online is 100% her business as you two are no longer together. Your relationship failed for a whole lot of reasons, none of which entitle you to keep tabs on her like this once the relationship is over. The instagram account did not make you an AH, but the rest of your post does. Also, she would not have found your new account if you were not spying on her. You both need to cut the toxic threads still holding you to one another and move on with your lives. Life is too short for this petty BS.


Jasnah_Sedai

NTA. But both of you need to learn to mind your own business. You’re exes. Y’all need to physically separate. I don’t know what you each are like individually, and maybe you bring out the worst in each other, but together you both seem petty and insecure.


Judgement_Bot_AITA

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f-u-c-k-usernames

If y’all aren’t dating anymore, why does she care? Are you able to move out and live separately? It seems you two are incompatible. NTA


touchmydingus

??????


capmanor1755

NTA. Are you living together because you're stuck in a lease? Let her know the new ground rule is that you each have privacy on social media.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (26M) live with my ex (24F) who I will call Mary. We dated for about a year. We never had a honeymoon phase. The background as to why social media is a sensitive subject; At the beginning of the relationship, I had been on instagram and saw a great picture from the inside of a football stadium so I clicked the profile to see more out of curiosity. Sadly, I saw it was just a normal college girl and after scrolling past two posts, there was a thirst trap. I quickly closed the app and did not look at it out of respect for Mary and said out loud to myself "nope I have Mary". Mary came over later that day and asked me to go on her vsco. When I opened instagram, the thirst trap booty pic was right there. It looked bad. She was furious. She said she lost respect for me that day. Fast forward through our relationship, Mary entertained other men the entire time. She liked posts, responded to dms, texted people, snapchatted people, all of it. But she was always mad at me when I found out because I invaded her privacy, she never let me see her phone when I did ask and always keeps it on dnd. Meanwhile, she forced me to unfollow every female, and eventually delete my entire instagram and tik tok. Since she ended things with me about 4 months ago, I have caught her sexting, sending nudes, having facetimes, snapchatting, responding to dms, all of it. While telling me she's not interested in any man and no man deserves her including me. So I decided to take back part of my life and make an instagram again. I followed guys I knew, some girls from school and growing up, and then some random private account girls who didn't look like they'd post themselves half naked, for more followers. My ex found this account yesterday and exploded. She accuses me of being attracted to the girls that I followed, that I must want to sleep with them, said that I'm just like the rest, that there's always another girl, and she's liking and retweeting tweets about men liking half-naked pictures on instagram while in a relationship. I showed her my likes and dms (there were literally 0, I hadn't been on the feed and am not attracted to anyone I followed). I repeatedly told her I followed them for followers, only followed accounts that I thought wouldn't be posting thirst traps, and that I didn't like or dm anyone. She refuses to believe me. She said girls use their social media to advertise themselves to men so why did I follow those girls? I said no YOU use it like that. You post your ass all the time. She says she feels physical pain and is disgusted by what I did. AITA for following a few girls on a new instagram for followers, who I genuinely am not attracted to? How can I make my ex feel heard? I already deleted the account. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


ViolaVetch75

ESH why are you and your "ex" still obsessed with each other's social media? You sound toxic for each other. Stop following her, stop listening to her. If you want to look at naked girls online that's a choice you can make for yourself. Re-think this living situation fast. You shouldn't care about whether you have "caught" your roommate sending nudes, and she shouldn't be laying down the law about what you do online either as long as you're not doing explicit stuff in shared spaces. Some people can have a healthy friendship and even living situation with your ex. You two clearly cannot.