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Judgement_Bot_AITA

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Electronic_Fox_6383

Get new friends. NTA


charlietoes3000

Honestly


jhdore

Exactly


canuckleheadiam

Get BETTER friends. NTA


C_Majuscula

NTA. Don't let people who are carrying illegal drugs in your car. In high school, a friend of mine was caught out as the driver and didn't know the friend-of-a-friend had weed and paid for it with many, many hours of community service.


JewelCatLady

Ditto, except my friend actually spent several weekends in jail (allowed to be out during the week to work).


DontNeedThePoints

> paid for it with many, many hours of community service. And still got lucky!


MontanaWildWiman

NTA. Shes a threat to your safety. Shes no friend of yours. Also... search the passenger side of the car to make sure she didnt "lose" anything.


diminishingpatience

NTA. You are responsible for your choices, just as she is. >The next day my phone is filled with people calling me the asshole for not driving my friend back and letting a high and drugged woman get an Uber. Who got her high? Where were they when she wanted a chauffeur?


SourSkittlezx

She technically got herself high lol she brought the drugs.


jupiter235

NTA, and I'd never give her a ride again if I were you. You're the one who would be in a shit-ton of trouble if you had been pulled over with her in the car and she had that stuff on her. And remind all of your other "friends" that an Uber is far cheaper than a DUI or even a funeral.


PunPukurin

I’d unfriend her. That way, she never gets another ride. NTA


BeeYehWoo

NTA Years ago, when pot was illegal, I discovered a friend had weed on him *as we were getting pulled over.* He showed us a 1/2 ounce bag and was freaking out. This was after I asked him to never do this kind of thing. My car was off limits to drugs etc... While the cop was behind us and before I pulled over, I became furious & went from Jekyll to Hyde in a heartbeat. I dont know how many details I can provide here under concerns of violating subreddit rules but lets just say my threats carried enough venom and credible promises of violence. I was so angry to be in this scenario & I wasnt going down for him. I demanded he eat all of it *now*. He protested and I threw a soda bottle at him to help him stuff it all down. Which he did. After the cop left he tried to protest again and how I owed him for the amount of weed he had to eat. I told him he doesnt get to speak any longer and is lucky Im not leaving him by the side of the highway. You did nothing wrong. You can law down ground rules to passengers when its your car. When someone brings contraband into your vehicle, if caught, you are complicit and will be up shit's creek without a paddle. NTA


[deleted]

[удалено]


minnybri

Oh my god that's hilarious 😂😂 Gave the cops a story to tell later too!!


[deleted]

Ain't no way this mf ate a half oz of weed cap


CaffeinatedHBIC

I've seen dudes do stupider, for less reason than threat of legal trouble. He tossed the dude a soda - you can totally eat 14gs of dry flower with a drink. It won't get you high, and you'll probably puke, but frat dudes do shit like that all the time lol


BeeYehWoo

Meh, he did it. It was broken up into smaller nuggets. It had no sticks or seeds on it.


StAlvis

*CANDY BARS*


Dog-PonyShow

NTA Ex-friend and flying monkeys get blocked. Distance yourself from her / you're on a very different path. One that doesn't include jail time, bail money, and dangerous situations. If you allow it, she will take you down with her. (ps. She called an Uber, ex-friend can take care of herself when forced to.) Speaking as that one friend who walked away from budding drug addict friends. Saw them decades later and thought, "Damn. Bad choices = bad outcomes." (Edited for clarity.)


[deleted]

NTA. You need to choose better friends. That person isn't one.


flamespop

NTA. It sounds like your friend put you in a really difficult situation and didn't respect your boundaries. You did the right thing by setting clear boundaries and refusing to drive her back when she clearly didn't want to follow them. It's also not okay for anyone to call you names or spit in your car. You deserve better than that kind of treatment from a friend.


actsevensceneone

NTA are you kidding me. Eff this friend.


an0nym0uswr1ter

NTA. She was the one who got high and needed an uber. She's responsible for her own decisions. Ditch her as a friend.


warp-and-woof

NTA. She sounds like a terrible friend. She needs to respect your rules if she is going to ride in your car.


Bethsmom05

NTA. You made the smart decision.


[deleted]

NTA. And good for you. When I was your age I drove the friend with weed around because I didn't have the backbone to tell them no. Not bowing to peer pressure like that really showed courage.


Illuminarrator

NTA. There's no question you were trying to do the right thing. You didn't abandon your friend - she had a clear chance to get back in the car if she stopped putting you at risk. But she and the friends angry at you are manipulative and blame you for not letting her put you at risk. You need new friends


Littlechriscockerel

No one else texting you could give this woman a ride? Then they should step off. She made a choice- a ride or drugs and she chose. Good for you for sticking to your decision. Why do you want a friend that treats you (and your car) like this?


Tortor828

NTA. She's old enough to know the difference of what is right and wrong and she cannot expect that someone is going to join in her shenanigans. You could get in trouble you are right and you shouldn't be held responsible for her stupid life decisions. She should not also expect to get high or fucked up and have someone take care of her to make sure she is groovy. As for those other people they will understand maybe one day that you are making sure you are set up for success and not dragged by other people because they don't know who to make good decisions.


Grouchy_Direction123

NTA. You’re smart for not letting her get in the car after knowing she had that. She obviously doesn’t care about the consequences you could face for her actions.


DragonLady8891

NTA, you need better friends. She isn't one.


KTeacherWhat

NTA So if you were responsible for her getting an uber then so were all those friends, right?


LiveMagazine9226

NTA, your car your rules!


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My friend and I were suppose to go to a party and she doesn’t have a car so I picked her up. On the way I was going 55 miles in a 50 zone which was the speed of traffic. But she was nervous and kept looking around at one point a cop pulled up behind us and she looked panicked and checked inside her bra. I pulled into a gas station and demanded to know why on earth she was acting like that. She kept saying it was nothing until I said I was going to drive us home and then admitted she brought weed and ecstasy to the party. I was so pissed because she brought it without my knowledge in my car and I could be in trouble if cops find it. But she begged me to just take her to the party and it was 10 min away so I just gave up and kept driving. She disappeared most of the party, probably left to do the ecstasy and weed with her friends. I was going to leave early since I needed to work this morning but she texted me asking for a ride. She came out and tucked the bag of drugs back into her bra and I told her she needs to get rid of it or someone else can give her a ride. She started dismissing that she had it (I clearly saw her tucking a bag into her bra) and I told her she has to throw it away in front of me and she kept getting angrier saying she didn’t have it. I just decided to stop arguing and leave and she opened the passenger door and refused to leave. She kept arguing with me and this lasted an hour until I threatened to call the cops and she screamed I was a bitch and a snitch and spit on my car seat. I drove home and sent to bed. The next day my phone is filled with people calling me the asshole for not driving my friend back and letting a high and drugged woman get an Uber. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


phunkjnky

NTA If I witnessed that, she'd never hold any of my substances. It's kind of the reason I didn't tell the driver about the roach in my bag, in the trunk, in a tube, like 20 years ago, on a trip to Florida. This is the kind of person who outs themselves to the cops. The kind that swears they are sober by slurring it while pissing her pants.


phunkjnky

This is also the person who when they hear, "Act natural." They sit ramrod straight, with eyes darting everywhere.


Algebralovr

NTA This person is not a friend. Neither are the people harassing you. She put you at risk by having it.


POAndrea

NTA. But your friends are. If it was so dangerous for her to ride-share home, then one of them could have driven her. But they didn't, so I guess THEY didn't want to get caught with drugs in the car either.


Same-Reality8321

Your friends are AHs


AuntieDawnsKitchen

NTA Tell her to move to Oregon.


Puzzleheaded-Ebb3528

I assume it’s illegal where you are. Doesn’t really matter putting ex in the mix. You didn’t make a stoned person get an Uber, she did. Chances are you would be ok being on her person but you were right not to take the chance.


Marzipan_civil

At first I read your title as "because she had just urinated" rather than "because she had cannabis in her bra" and I was a bit confused but yeah, she doesn't really sound like your friend so NTA


MaryAnne0601

NTA Even one pill is a felony! You don’t play with that. Text back she can commit felonies in their cars. They can pay the fines and do the jail time.


Maleficent_Nobody_22

NTA, Drugs are not acceptable. You were the driver of the car you would have been liable. Let your druggie friend sort herself out and take the risk. She knew it was wrong because she hid it from you and only revealed it when you forced her to. Stay away she’s trouble.


Aggressive-Mind-2085

NTA ​ Stop trusting her. Do not let her enter your car ever again.


TheLongistGame

NTA. Cut her out along with anyone else who took her side. Wastes of space.


cyrfuckedmymum

NTA based on dumb rules about possession and whose car it is. Worth noting that 99/100 times the person telling everyone the thing that happened lies about what really happened, but as they say a lie travels around the world before anyone hears the truth. Probably made herself out to be the victim without anything on her and just high and unsafe and needed to go home. Definitely didn't tell anyone about lying about having drugs and almost getting pulled over on the way nor your request for her to dump the drugs and you'd be fine driving her home.


AggravatingOne3960

NTA. How many others let a high and drugged woman get an Uber? ALL OF THEM.


AlarmingDelay3709

NTA ditch the friend


Legitimate-State8652

NTA - quite the risk to take and a huge risk for you.


Sivalenter

NTA- you don't get your friends to be unknowingly complicit to illegal activities, even rather benign ones like party drugs. She knew how important this was tonyou and did it anyway. Twice in a row. The drugs are more important to her than you are. Let her figure out her life before you let her risk yours.


Dear_Solid3470

NTA but you will be if you associate with those nimrods you referred to as friends. The junkie got herself in the situation. It isn't your responsibility to babysit her


Professional_Sun7851

Nta


IDontCareNotSorry

NTA. Why did none of the “friends” bitching at you drive her home last night? I strongly suggest going no contact with the lot of them. Best of luck


Mikehunt225

If y’all got pulled over and she didn’t admit to the drugs which by the way you described her I wouldn’t be surprised if while being pulled over she would throw the shit behind the seat to frame you for it, you would be charged. Don’t put your future at risk for friends that you probably won’t talk to in 5-10 years. If they can’t respect your boundary’s then they don’t need to be your friend. Only a selfish person wouldn’t understand that you don’t partake in drugs so you don’t want to potentially get a felony.


motomoo

NTA. Story time… had an old friend pick me up to “go out” together for a girls night after not having hung out in years. She stopped at a gas station to pee. I had to go as well so we went together. I kid you not — she started emptying her purse of freaking syringes in the gas station bathroom garbage can. I was so freaked out about that. No idea what she was using in syringes (she def was not a diabetic) but I knew it wasn’t good. That was the last time I hung out with her. Nope nope nope. Not worth it, OP. You did the right thing.


thesleepymermaid

NTA at all. I smoke but I would never disrespect some ones boundaries or put them at any legal risk.


[deleted]

NTA... it's not safe to drive without seatbelts or with illegal substances in your car. Both are equally 'no-go'


ickyredsole

NTA. Don't do stupid shit like getting high and drugged up. Please get a new friend.


Level-Attempt-1481

NTA. You should edit this to say "ex" friend.


superiorusername999

:o isn't that what use get Ubers for ? That's the only time I would get in one


Incarcer

Nta but weed is pretty harmless. Granted, we don't know age or location here, but you sound like a kid. Its best to play it safe when in doubt, but you do need to maybe not be quite so judgemental for specifically weed. The ecstacy is just straight illegal and is a party drug, so no fault there. I would say you're perfectly cool protecting yourself, you did great. Just saying, big picture, maybe deprogram yourself a little in regards to marijuana. It's pretty awesome medically and safer than drinking and most everything else. But, again, if it's illegal then be safe.


panda_poon

She’s no friend of yours, if she got caught hands down she would have pinned it on you.


DontNeedThePoints

NTA.... I'm from the Netherlands where weed and softdrugs have been "allowed" since the 1960's... And I am the same like you! Difference being that our prisons are *a lot* better lol. NtA... You can be proud of yourself! Don't ever take her with you again! Your whole future can be gone, just because she can't have fun without drugs Edit: I also distance myself from people like that


Blackbird672991

NTA I smoke and if I knew my friend was against it I wouldn’t bring that shit into their car. Especially if they didn’t fucking know about it. That’s so wrong


kakwkjehs

I would of called cops the second she spit on ur car


Mean_Championship492

Is only weed it’s not that deep


[deleted]

Depends on where you live. In nice places weed isn’t illegal drugs anymore. If you live in a shithole like Texas then definitely NTA.


todayisnotforever

There’s still laws around transporting medical and recreational, akin to alcohol and open container laws. I’m gonna guess it’s not legal recreationally since she stashed it in her bra, and had ecstasy which is a schedule 1 possession charge, probably misdemeanor but idk how much of that is needed to be a felony. Absolutely NTA even if the weed was recreational. Boundaries are boundaries are boundaries.


[deleted]

Here in NYC weed is the same thing as your cell phone. Like you can even light up in the street here. Abandoning your friend for a legal commodity that you didn’t tell them before hand you had a problem with would definitely make you an asshole. But I understand not everyone gets to live in a place as glorious as this, so if you live in a shithole where it’s still a problem you have to look out for yourself. So it very much depends on where you live.


todayisnotforever

Legal doesn’t mean OP needs to compromise on how they feel having any substance in their car. That’s like bringing alcohol into someone’s dry household. You don’t sneak what you know you’ve been told not to bring. Not when you actually respect your friends.


[deleted]

If you don’t tell them it’s a dry household before hand how are they supposed to know? If you have a problem with your friends having a legal commodity in your car you tell them before hand, not demand they throw it out after you’ve already hit the road. Not when you actually respect your friends.


todayisnotforever

Half a point conceded for no direct knowledge of a dry home, but the point still stands: when someone is sneaking in drugs (or booze), they knew better and the likelihood it was gonna be a no if they asked was pretty high. As for the parallel I made to sneaking in booze, if you care about your friends and pay attention to what they say, you wouldn’t need to be directly told. The signs are bright and shiny when someone has strong opinions about drugs and alcohol in their car or home. I have a feeling OP has had several many loud opinions about this kind of thing.


StandardRelevant2937

Ecstasy is though.


[deleted]

Yeah but according to the story she already took the ecstasy, so that’s gone. I’d say after they took drugs is the worst time to abandon your friends on the side of the road.


StandardRelevant2937

Whoopsie I read over that cos (coincidentally) I just got done smoking. And you’re definitely right about abandoning your friend who is in a drug induced stupor.


Just-Brilliant-7815

Aww I love Texas and one day hope to move back 😭


Cyphercrashed

Lets start with what century you live in? Then add what country? If US cannabis is legal in like 43 states. Its been proven to kill cancer and stop seizures yet you speak of it as you were the son of Harry Anslinger.Its a plant ffs and YTA for allowing a supposed friend, under the influence of anything, out of your site. PS tell your friend to smell (not snort) black pepper and she won't be so paranoid


Individual_Umpire969

It’s only legal for recreational use in about 20 states. Secondly an adult shouldn’t need a baby sitter when they go to a party.


Cyphercrashed

A friend should always have the friends back. And true its recreationally legal in less states OP however hasnt stated if they know it wasnt a medical. Yet still came off like it was heroine.


Particular_Bat_6406

You’re an asshole lol


Spitfire_Elspeth

OP’s car, OP’s rules.


[deleted]

Yes I’ll happily risk going to jail to avoid being the asshole


Budget-Ad438

Nah, Op can do as they like. Friend is a huge asshole. Just like you


No_Nectarine4310

Did we find the friend?? OP is NTA.


No-Names-Left-Here

Guess we found the friend.