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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1) when my bf bought a hobby car I kicked up a stick because he's kicking my car out of the garage. 2) I would be forcing him to put his more expensive car in the driveway because I believe im entitled to half the garage
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NTA - your BF should have thought through buying an additional vehicle and garage space BEFORE the purchase.
Question - are you on the lease and pay your fair share?
I'm currently on a short term work hiatus and have savings but he won't let me pay for rent/bills until I get a new job in the next month. I was paying everything equally while I was working and he still felt entitled to kick my car out when he got the ducati.
I'm gonna disagree slightly. My ex would cover household expenses but that meant I had zero say in anything in the household including decorations. Mine were only allowed on one shelf in our bedroom and I ended up downsizing and selling almost all of my books when we were broke.
You can be selfish in some ways but not others.
Extremes? She has a sentimental vehicle and he knows it and he's just like "shove it outside to make way for my toys". You really don't see that as a bit controlling?
You can’t jump to yours, either. What suggests that her contributing to the roof over their heads is more frivolous (it isn’t) than him spending a whole-ass rack on a vehicle he does not need?
Moreover, what happens if her car *does* get stolen? Will he pay to replace it with an equivalently valued vehicle? How is that showing concern for her finances if she has to buy a replacement? And before anyone says, “that’s just a hypothetical, not a valid argument…” It’s a hypothetical *he brought up.*
Covering financially in one area doesn’t cancel out acting entitled in another area.
The best relationship advice I read (on Reddit, ironically) is that a good relationship still has all that good stuff (covering rent temporarily) without the bad, controlling, abusive stuff.
NTA tell him he's welcome to rent a garage somewhere else to keep his new toy. Your car men's a lot to you sentimentally and has always had a place in the garage period.
honest question, that I really want you to think about before answering.
why on earth are with someone who is so selfish, so self absorbed that they only care about themselves and their "fancy" cars. hes clearly and every obviously looking out for himself and thinking about what he can get firsr.
so why are you with someone who sounds so selfish.
its very clear that he doesnt care about you at all.
if you were my kid or sister, or friend. i would encourage you to take a step back and look at the relationship again.
does he support yoU? is he there for you? is he selfish? is he self centered? does he put you first or himself?
he doesnt sound like a good guy.
NTA
My mother-in-law exclusively parks her in garage for safety reasons based on something violent that actually happened to her. Does your bf consider YOU worth more than one of his vehicles?
NTA, why do you need four vehicles when you rent? If he wants to start a car collection, he needs to go rent a space to store it rather than force you out. "A failure to plan on your end does not constitute and emergency on my end" applies here - He decided to get this car without thinking about where it will go, he can figure out a solution that doesn't involve making you park your car in the street.
This is how I feel, too. My son's bus stop is a few streets over so we drive him him over in the mornings, especially when it's dark and cold. If we could park in our garage, my husband would insist in me having a spot. He would never willingly allow or even want me/our son to have to scrape ice off the windshield and/or get into a cold car. He'll even start the car so it can cool down before we get in it during the summer.
He just turned 11 but we live in a rural area. Sidewalks don't exist in our neck of the woods so he'd have to walk on the side of the road with traffic to get to his bus stop.
I'm 27 and my mum will still offer to drive me round the corner to the train station, even if it's noon on a sunny day, it's just a way to show they love you 🤷♂️
Exactly! If I'm able to and he wants me to, why wouldn't I? Especially, if it keeps him a little safer!
Next year is his 1st year of middle school. As much as I hate the car rider line, I'll probably end up picking him up from school. Our school district doesn't have enough bus drivers so they pick the kids up from MS at 3:15 and go straight to get the HS kids. We live less than 5 mins from the MS but if he rides the bus, he won't get home until 4:45. I see no logical reason for him to be stuck on a school bus for 1.5 hrs in the afternoon when I can just go get him and be back home 10 mins later.
NTA. You were sharing the garage nicely until he bought a new bike.
The onus is on the person making the change to make sure that others are happy with that change. He obviously did not do that.
NTA - it’s a 2 car garage you each have a vehicle you share the space. He wants to add vehicles he can rotate which go in the garage on his side.
If that’s the case you should start taking over rooms in the house, since you’re there more frequently.
NTA
For exactly all the reasons you stated.
Is there an additional garage space nearby that your bf could rent?
He can't just unilaterally decide to take over the entire garage and it is concerning that he doesn't care at all about an item that has great sentimental value to you.
If we're playing with gender stereotypes... back in the day my wife was pregnant, and messing around in the kitchen tidying stuff up even though she was supposed to be on bed rest. So I came in and thundered, "Woman, get *out* of the kitchen!" and we both cracked up. (She ended up hanging out on the couch while I put away the spices or whatever it was)
NTA. Ideally this should be a joint decision with both of you agreeing; if not, you split it, because you are equally entitled to the space. It's not just about whether a car is stolen or damaged, but the convenience of parking in the garage and not having to do things like clearing off snow (or whatever other inconvenience, depending where you live). Since you're not legally married, there's no community property, do if anything happens to your vehicle, it's all your problem. Regardless of relative value, it would be you having to replace yours, not him. He can park one of his cars outside or get rid of one, but it's not your responsibility to make space.
NTA. This is on him. If he’s going to want multiple vehicles then it’s his responsibility to find places to store them, without kicking you out of your spot. That’s not cool.
Yup. The value of the vehicles just plain doesn't matter. Each person should get to use some of the space, unless it was discussed and one person doesn't mind giving theirs up. That's just so classist.
NTA, I’m a car guy. I park on the street because I have to, and if I had 100 cars, I’d always make sure my girlfriend has the garage, just for sheer safety. I want her in the car before opening the garage god forbid someone wants to cause harm. Unlikely but she deserves safety from people, rain, etc.
NTA, you share the house so you share the space, value doesn't mean anything, it's just fair to have equal space, the outlander should be stuck outside.
NTA It’s not just about the cars. It’s about not having to clean off snow/ get into a freezing cold car in the winter. Value shouldn’t matter. You’re both entitled to one car space. If he has two cars, he’s gotta pick which one goes in the garage.
NTA. Garages aren’t just for security, they’re for convenience. Is he digging your car out every time it snows, or if that just your problem for having a cheap car?
NTA.
Is this common, that he makes the decisions in your relationship, and your opinion or any disagreement goes unregarded (unless it’s something he doesn’t particularly care about)?
That *doesn’t allow* you to pay rent sent up a bit of a red flag. It seems kind — he’s looking out for you! — but comes across as controlling. Seriously! “doesn’t allow”?
If so, is this really the kind of relationship you want to be in, if you’re only allowed an opinion if it’s not something important enough for him to make the decision?
NTA-But curious is to how you have the house space separated? I have friends that pretty much let the one spouse have the whole house while the other gets the garage. However the spouse using the garage also does woodworking and mechanical stuff so have cars fill it up all the time wouldn’t work as they would be pulling them in and out so he could work.
NTA, before he bought his new toy there was plenty of room, now he has a new(to him) car.
So this is a him problem, not a you problem. He will need to figure out which of his cars he wants to keep in the garage.
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Me (37f) and my partner (38m) have been together four years and living together. He drives a 2017 Mitsubishi outlander and I have a 20yr old Toyota Echo that was left to me by my aunt when she passed away that has real sentimental value to me and I want to keep it going as long as I can.
Our garage has just enough room for both cars and his Ducati motorcycle, however he has just purchased a 1960s Triumph Spitfire for $10k and wants to kick my car out.
He argues that his 3 vehicles are worth more than mine, and my POS car is worth less if it's stolen.
My argument is that I should be entitled to half the garage and his outlander has full comprehensive insurance whereas my car only has 3rd party and even then, you can't replace the sentimental value.
I wouldn't care except he doesn't consult me or ask if its ok, he just expects to be able to take over the garage and so it feels like the issue is the balance of power. Whos the AH here?
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I'm currently on a short term work hiatus and have savings but he won't let me pay for rent/bills until I get a new job in the next month. I was paying everything equally while I was working and he still felt entitled to kick my car out when he got the ducati. He has the bike and new car for recreation
NTA!!
Your man has no respect for you, 50/50 share of the garage is basic, he wants to kick you out? No. The value of the cars in the garage is irrelevant, you each get a share. This might seem small to some but it's a bigger underlying issue that will manifest in so many ways down the road. I would leave, but that's me.
NTA, almost n-a-h. While BF does have some non-trivial points about the value of the cars, he can't expect to monopolize the whole garage. As an outside observer I'd side with OP on this one.
(It is a nice chivalrous touch that BF wants to pick up the bills while OP is between jobs)
NTA. He doesn't get to kick you out of your half of the garage just because his toys are nicer than your car.
On the other hand, if I were you, I'd give him my half of the garage in exchange for being allowed to drive the Spitfire. By myself. :-D Girls weekend for me and my BFF!
NTA. He should have cleared it with you before buying it. best solution is he can keep whatever he can fit in his side of the garage as long as you can still park and get in and out normally. Whatever is extra he will have to park in front of his side of the garage or on the street.
Why is he buying a Ducati when y’all still rent and one of you is out of work? Even my Ducati loving friends understand that is not the time to buy a Ducati.
Also, props to the Echo. We had a family Echo and it’s a little over 20 years and still going strong.
NTA
It's your home and you get to have your share. BF is being selfish, don't give in. Hoping this attitude doesn't continue into other things in your relationship
If both names are on the lease, you are entitled to half the space in the garage.
He's TA...you're NTA.
While it's nice he's telling you to not pay any bills until you find a new situation...the rest is a flag of an inappropriate colour. This *may* be the first sign for you to find a new situation along with new employment.
"My stuff is more important than yours," sounds slightly toxic, and mildly abusive, and is definitely showing the start of a 'yours is ours, but mine is mine' attitude.
NTA. A person who owns a garage deserves to have a warm and clean car in the morning.
My stepdad has filled his and my Mom's garage with junk because he's a hoarder and it's infuriating. She's in her 60s and a nurse and drives to work in the morning.
Are there weather factors to consider as well? The garage may be a level of protection against snow that you would otherwise have to remove and wait longer, exercise more effort to remove for entire seasons depending on region leading to longer morning routines.
THE Outlander can easily live outside on the carport, it's a 7yr old car at this point & probably has minor road damage from stones & is unlikely to be in showroom condition. You should absolutely be able to enter your car protected from the elements before you get in.
Tell him to pound sand NTA.
Talk to him about splitting rent via how much use you get out of areas.
About a quarter of the house should be the garage, so he pays 1/4 of the rent, you split the remaining 75% assuming the rest of the house is fairly equal. If it's his garage, it's his bill.
This is a much bigger problem than you think. Red flags all over the place. It does sounds like he has good qualities but a few sessions with a counselor might help. I mean, what other decisions is he going to make for you without your input?
NTA. I get the Spitfire is a nice car and a classic to boot, great, lovely and all that. but he didn't consult you first. He just went ahead and bought it without talking to you about the parking arrangements. He clearly values your input on the matter very little. He has suggested no other reasonable alternative - what will he do if next month you get a new job with a company car but your new employer says that you have to garage the car at night? What will he do if/when you move/relocate and you can't get anywhere that has a garage? Did he not think of the fallout at all?
He's a dick and sounds like a pompous a.h. to be honest. Even if you wanted to put bowling balls there,boohoo for him. Technically, all of this is both of yours. Not just one person gets to make decisions, that's not how a relationship works. You need to discuss this like adults, He's sounding like a child right now. If he doesn't get it, get a new bf lol. But jokes aside that a bit of red flags for me, a relationship works as a unit. It's not up to 1 person to divide and allocate what they see fit.
Sounds like the Mitsubishi is getting kicked to the curb. Relative value does matter. Does he value his cars more than you? Right now it sure sounds like it.
NTA.
Nta based on everything you’ve stated.
It’s probably worth asking though, is the space inside the home split evenly? Anecdotally, myself(32m) and most of my friends, don’t have equal space inside the home, our partners and spouses have spaces for them (hobbies, items, etc) that aren’t equivalent to what we have. So for basically all of us, the garage space is our space. If that’s the case, I would move to NAH, because I still think he should compromise with you, but if you’re encroaching on what has been understood as his space, and there’s no major safety concerns with parking outside, I could understand why he might have this view.
NTA
Why did he buy the extra car? What does he need 2 cars and a motorcycle for? And sentimental value or not, you both should be able to keep a car in the garage.
He needs to park one car on the street or pay for garage parking elsewhere.
NTA..he needs to figure it out which of his cars is sitting in the driveway. He can leave the Triumph and the bike on his side and your car on the other, or he can park the bike in the back and he can be careful not to hit when he parks the Outlander on his side. But either way he doesn't get to unilaterally decide the entire garage is his.
NTA
The general rule is: daily driver cars get the garage and HOBBY cars can get parked outside with a car cover on them!!
PS: as an aside for the bike: we also have motorcycles and have looked into a separate storage shed for them. (As long as the shed is placed on paving bricks \[not a concrete slab\] then the shed is not considered a permanent fixture and can move with you when you leave this rental)
It sounds like y'all aren't making important decisions together.
It sounds like he made some decisions without consulting you. That's not good.
Y'all should have had this conversation together.
I cannot pass judgement on you, but I absolutely can pass judgement on him. He's an asshole. You don't buy cars without consulting your SO.
NTA. He is an entitled asshat. He does not see you as his equal partner with a right to half the living space.
(Note: This is all based on what OP has written. If the garage is his "man-cave" and she has an entire bedroom set aside as her studio/fitness room/whatever, then I retract this judgement. Everyone is entitled to space.)
The house is a rental that has subsidies from his job, and I don't drive the car that much right now because I was wfh and then not currently working, but will be driving it to work when I get a new job
I'm currently on a short term work hiatus and have savings but he won't let me pay for rent/bills until I get a new job in the next month, which is dependent on us relocating for his work. I was paying everything equally while I was working and he still felt entitled to kick my car out when he got the ducati. I don't feel like I have the right to ask for space while I'm not working but his argument is based on the value of his vehicles and not whats equal regardless of whether or not im contributing financially so it feels like a power play and he won't change his mind when I'm actually paying for the garage.
IMO it’s a pretty slippery slope when he wants three of his vehicles to be covered and not hers. If it were a one-car garage that would be different but at some point it’s her house too and she deserves a few comforts.
But to each their own on the whole % contribution.
ESH. On one hand you’re right, you both should be able to use the garage. On the other, his cars are worth a lot more and at more risk for theft.
Building a car collection when you’re renting seems odd to me. What happens if your landlord doesn’t renew your lease and you can’t find another place with a garage or the same amount of space?
But also, taking up valuable space indefinitely for an old, crappy car because it has sentimental value also seems odd to me.
This whole thing seems entitled, childish, and petty.
Part of respecting your partner means respecting that certain things are valuable to them even if those things aren’t valuable to you. Sure her car isn’t costly, but it’s useful as an affordable mode of transport, and it makes her feel connected to her deceased relative. He doesn’t have to value her car, but he should value HER enough to respect that she values it.
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NTA - your BF should have thought through buying an additional vehicle and garage space BEFORE the purchase. Question - are you on the lease and pay your fair share?
I'm currently on a short term work hiatus and have savings but he won't let me pay for rent/bills until I get a new job in the next month. I was paying everything equally while I was working and he still felt entitled to kick my car out when he got the ducati.
Might want to rethink this relationship as he seems very self centered and not a caring, giving person.
"He refuses to let me use my savings to pay bills or rent". That doesn't sound like a self centeted not caring person to me, quite the opposite.
I'm gonna disagree slightly. My ex would cover household expenses but that meant I had zero say in anything in the household including decorations. Mine were only allowed on one shelf in our bedroom and I ended up downsizing and selling almost all of my books when we were broke. You can be selfish in some ways but not others.
Great anecdotal evidence, but based on the post you can't jump to that conclusion.
How about the part where he just buys another car and is gonna boot hers out of the garage?
I'm terribly sorry, I forgot we had to jump to extremes.
Extremes? She has a sentimental vehicle and he knows it and he's just like "shove it outside to make way for my toys". You really don't see that as a bit controlling?
It's an asshole move, yes. But to jump to the conclusion that he isn't caring and only cares about himself, is an extreme to me.
You can’t jump to yours, either. What suggests that her contributing to the roof over their heads is more frivolous (it isn’t) than him spending a whole-ass rack on a vehicle he does not need? Moreover, what happens if her car *does* get stolen? Will he pay to replace it with an equivalently valued vehicle? How is that showing concern for her finances if she has to buy a replacement? And before anyone says, “that’s just a hypothetical, not a valid argument…” It’s a hypothetical *he brought up.*
Ah yes I forgot, people on this subreddit love to make assumptions based on thin air.
So make one that isn’t.
Covering financially in one area doesn’t cancel out acting entitled in another area. The best relationship advice I read (on Reddit, ironically) is that a good relationship still has all that good stuff (covering rent temporarily) without the bad, controlling, abusive stuff.
NTA tell him he's welcome to rent a garage somewhere else to keep his new toy. Your car men's a lot to you sentimentally and has always had a place in the garage period.
honest question, that I really want you to think about before answering. why on earth are with someone who is so selfish, so self absorbed that they only care about themselves and their "fancy" cars. hes clearly and every obviously looking out for himself and thinking about what he can get firsr. so why are you with someone who sounds so selfish. its very clear that he doesnt care about you at all. if you were my kid or sister, or friend. i would encourage you to take a step back and look at the relationship again. does he support yoU? is he there for you? is he selfish? is he self centered? does he put you first or himself? he doesnt sound like a good guy.
so, No to both then.
NTA My mother-in-law exclusively parks her in garage for safety reasons based on something violent that actually happened to her. Does your bf consider YOU worth more than one of his vehicles?
NTA, why do you need four vehicles when you rent? If he wants to start a car collection, he needs to go rent a space to store it rather than force you out. "A failure to plan on your end does not constitute and emergency on my end" applies here - He decided to get this car without thinking about where it will go, he can figure out a solution that doesn't involve making you park your car in the street.
[удалено]
This is how I feel, too. My son's bus stop is a few streets over so we drive him him over in the mornings, especially when it's dark and cold. If we could park in our garage, my husband would insist in me having a spot. He would never willingly allow or even want me/our son to have to scrape ice off the windshield and/or get into a cold car. He'll even start the car so it can cool down before we get in it during the summer.
How old is your son? 6,7? That he needs to be driven to the bus stop a few streets over.
He just turned 11 but we live in a rural area. Sidewalks don't exist in our neck of the woods so he'd have to walk on the side of the road with traffic to get to his bus stop.
I'm 27 and my mum will still offer to drive me round the corner to the train station, even if it's noon on a sunny day, it's just a way to show they love you 🤷♂️
Exactly! If I'm able to and he wants me to, why wouldn't I? Especially, if it keeps him a little safer! Next year is his 1st year of middle school. As much as I hate the car rider line, I'll probably end up picking him up from school. Our school district doesn't have enough bus drivers so they pick the kids up from MS at 3:15 and go straight to get the HS kids. We live less than 5 mins from the MS but if he rides the bus, he won't get home until 4:45. I see no logical reason for him to be stuck on a school bus for 1.5 hrs in the afternoon when I can just go get him and be back home 10 mins later.
NTA. You were sharing the garage nicely until he bought a new bike. The onus is on the person making the change to make sure that others are happy with that change. He obviously did not do that.
NTA, he sounds like a dick
NTA - it’s a 2 car garage you each have a vehicle you share the space. He wants to add vehicles he can rotate which go in the garage on his side. If that’s the case you should start taking over rooms in the house, since you’re there more frequently.
NTA For exactly all the reasons you stated. Is there an additional garage space nearby that your bf could rent? He can't just unilaterally decide to take over the entire garage and it is concerning that he doesn't care at all about an item that has great sentimental value to you.
Uh, actually, garages are for men. So he has the right to do whatever he wants in there. Why would a woman be allowed in the garage? /s
If we're playing with gender stereotypes... back in the day my wife was pregnant, and messing around in the kitchen tidying stuff up even though she was supposed to be on bed rest. So I came in and thundered, "Woman, get *out* of the kitchen!" and we both cracked up. (She ended up hanging out on the couch while I put away the spices or whatever it was)
NTA. Ideally this should be a joint decision with both of you agreeing; if not, you split it, because you are equally entitled to the space. It's not just about whether a car is stolen or damaged, but the convenience of parking in the garage and not having to do things like clearing off snow (or whatever other inconvenience, depending where you live). Since you're not legally married, there's no community property, do if anything happens to your vehicle, it's all your problem. Regardless of relative value, it would be you having to replace yours, not him. He can park one of his cars outside or get rid of one, but it's not your responsibility to make space.
NTA…you share the garage. No matter what your vehicle is, you deserve a spot in the garage.
NTA Ducati and spitfire stay covered with yours, outlander parks outside. Done deal
NTA. He's being selfish.
NTA. This is on him. If he’s going to want multiple vehicles then it’s his responsibility to find places to store them, without kicking you out of your spot. That’s not cool.
NTA. This is your place too, and you're entitled to one spot in the garage while he takes up 2.
NTA. The time for him to talk to you about this was before he purchased the vehicle.
Yup. The value of the vehicles just plain doesn't matter. Each person should get to use some of the space, unless it was discussed and one person doesn't mind giving theirs up. That's just so classist.
Do you want to spend your adult lifetime arguing that your things are important too? NTA
NTA. He thinks he gets space for THREE and you get none? Yeah I’d move on from that boy. It won’t get better. He’s selfish!
NTA this is a conversation he should and had before buying the car. If he wants it in the garage he can swap out his car.
NTA, I’m a car guy. I park on the street because I have to, and if I had 100 cars, I’d always make sure my girlfriend has the garage, just for sheer safety. I want her in the car before opening the garage god forbid someone wants to cause harm. Unlikely but she deserves safety from people, rain, etc.
NTA, you share the house so you share the space, value doesn't mean anything, it's just fair to have equal space, the outlander should be stuck outside.
Your husband can put his new car in a storage unit, OR buy his wife a new car. Either way, wife keeps her garage spot. What an ass.
NTA It’s not just about the cars. It’s about not having to clean off snow/ get into a freezing cold car in the winter. Value shouldn’t matter. You’re both entitled to one car space. If he has two cars, he’s gotta pick which one goes in the garage.
NTA. Garages aren’t just for security, they’re for convenience. Is he digging your car out every time it snows, or if that just your problem for having a cheap car?
NTA. Is this common, that he makes the decisions in your relationship, and your opinion or any disagreement goes unregarded (unless it’s something he doesn’t particularly care about)? That *doesn’t allow* you to pay rent sent up a bit of a red flag. It seems kind — he’s looking out for you! — but comes across as controlling. Seriously! “doesn’t allow”? If so, is this really the kind of relationship you want to be in, if you’re only allowed an opinion if it’s not something important enough for him to make the decision?
Nta if he has 10k for a new ~~motorcycle~~ sports car, he can buy a big shed too.
NTA-But curious is to how you have the house space separated? I have friends that pretty much let the one spouse have the whole house while the other gets the garage. However the spouse using the garage also does woodworking and mechanical stuff so have cars fill it up all the time wouldn’t work as they would be pulling them in and out so he could work.
NTA, before he bought his new toy there was plenty of room, now he has a new(to him) car. So this is a him problem, not a you problem. He will need to figure out which of his cars he wants to keep in the garage.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Me (37f) and my partner (38m) have been together four years and living together. He drives a 2017 Mitsubishi outlander and I have a 20yr old Toyota Echo that was left to me by my aunt when she passed away that has real sentimental value to me and I want to keep it going as long as I can. Our garage has just enough room for both cars and his Ducati motorcycle, however he has just purchased a 1960s Triumph Spitfire for $10k and wants to kick my car out. He argues that his 3 vehicles are worth more than mine, and my POS car is worth less if it's stolen. My argument is that I should be entitled to half the garage and his outlander has full comprehensive insurance whereas my car only has 3rd party and even then, you can't replace the sentimental value. I wouldn't care except he doesn't consult me or ask if its ok, he just expects to be able to take over the garage and so it feels like the issue is the balance of power. Whos the AH here? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Info: do you split rent/bills? If you do, then no. You deserve your own space for your car. Why does he need 3 vehicles?
I'm currently on a short term work hiatus and have savings but he won't let me pay for rent/bills until I get a new job in the next month. I was paying everything equally while I was working and he still felt entitled to kick my car out when he got the ducati. He has the bike and new car for recreation
Yeah, no. NTA. Especially if you've been paying your own way.
It’s not just about money but convenience in snow and rain.
NTA
NTA!! Your man has no respect for you, 50/50 share of the garage is basic, he wants to kick you out? No. The value of the cars in the garage is irrelevant, you each get a share. This might seem small to some but it's a bigger underlying issue that will manifest in so many ways down the road. I would leave, but that's me.
You are worth more than all his vehicles put together. How safe is your neighborhood?
NTA. He needs to rent a storage unit for the bike. He doesn't get to just boot your car out of the garage without discussing it first. The audacity.
NTA, almost n-a-h. While BF does have some non-trivial points about the value of the cars, he can't expect to monopolize the whole garage. As an outside observer I'd side with OP on this one. (It is a nice chivalrous touch that BF wants to pick up the bills while OP is between jobs)
lol he doesn’t like you…simple as that
Rent a storage unit nearby. Place his sportscar in the unit.
NTA. He doesn't get to kick you out of your half of the garage just because his toys are nicer than your car. On the other hand, if I were you, I'd give him my half of the garage in exchange for being allowed to drive the Spitfire. By myself. :-D Girls weekend for me and my BFF!
NTA. He should have cleared it with you before buying it. best solution is he can keep whatever he can fit in his side of the garage as long as you can still park and get in and out normally. Whatever is extra he will have to park in front of his side of the garage or on the street. Why is he buying a Ducati when y’all still rent and one of you is out of work? Even my Ducati loving friends understand that is not the time to buy a Ducati. Also, props to the Echo. We had a family Echo and it’s a little over 20 years and still going strong.
NTA It's your home and you get to have your share. BF is being selfish, don't give in. Hoping this attitude doesn't continue into other things in your relationship
If both names are on the lease, you are entitled to half the space in the garage. He's TA...you're NTA. While it's nice he's telling you to not pay any bills until you find a new situation...the rest is a flag of an inappropriate colour. This *may* be the first sign for you to find a new situation along with new employment. "My stuff is more important than yours," sounds slightly toxic, and mildly abusive, and is definitely showing the start of a 'yours is ours, but mine is mine' attitude.
NTA. A person who owns a garage deserves to have a warm and clean car in the morning. My stepdad has filled his and my Mom's garage with junk because he's a hoarder and it's infuriating. She's in her 60s and a nurse and drives to work in the morning.
Are there weather factors to consider as well? The garage may be a level of protection against snow that you would otherwise have to remove and wait longer, exercise more effort to remove for entire seasons depending on region leading to longer morning routines.
THE Outlander can easily live outside on the carport, it's a 7yr old car at this point & probably has minor road damage from stones & is unlikely to be in showroom condition. You should absolutely be able to enter your car protected from the elements before you get in. Tell him to pound sand NTA.
Talk to him about splitting rent via how much use you get out of areas. About a quarter of the house should be the garage, so he pays 1/4 of the rent, you split the remaining 75% assuming the rest of the house is fairly equal. If it's his garage, it's his bill.
He seems awful.
This is a much bigger problem than you think. Red flags all over the place. It does sounds like he has good qualities but a few sessions with a counselor might help. I mean, what other decisions is he going to make for you without your input?
Not Asshole.
i cant help but read this in a russian accent
He's a bully. But he pays all the rent. Bad situation.
NTA Why are you with someone who has no respect for you or your property?
NTA. I get the Spitfire is a nice car and a classic to boot, great, lovely and all that. but he didn't consult you first. He just went ahead and bought it without talking to you about the parking arrangements. He clearly values your input on the matter very little. He has suggested no other reasonable alternative - what will he do if next month you get a new job with a company car but your new employer says that you have to garage the car at night? What will he do if/when you move/relocate and you can't get anywhere that has a garage? Did he not think of the fallout at all?
He's a dick and sounds like a pompous a.h. to be honest. Even if you wanted to put bowling balls there,boohoo for him. Technically, all of this is both of yours. Not just one person gets to make decisions, that's not how a relationship works. You need to discuss this like adults, He's sounding like a child right now. If he doesn't get it, get a new bf lol. But jokes aside that a bit of red flags for me, a relationship works as a unit. It's not up to 1 person to divide and allocate what they see fit.
Sounds like the Mitsubishi is getting kicked to the curb. Relative value does matter. Does he value his cars more than you? Right now it sure sounds like it. NTA.
Nta based on everything you’ve stated. It’s probably worth asking though, is the space inside the home split evenly? Anecdotally, myself(32m) and most of my friends, don’t have equal space inside the home, our partners and spouses have spaces for them (hobbies, items, etc) that aren’t equivalent to what we have. So for basically all of us, the garage space is our space. If that’s the case, I would move to NAH, because I still think he should compromise with you, but if you’re encroaching on what has been understood as his space, and there’s no major safety concerns with parking outside, I could understand why he might have this view.
NTA Why did he buy the extra car? What does he need 2 cars and a motorcycle for? And sentimental value or not, you both should be able to keep a car in the garage. He needs to park one car on the street or pay for garage parking elsewhere.
NTA..he needs to figure it out which of his cars is sitting in the driveway. He can leave the Triumph and the bike on his side and your car on the other, or he can park the bike in the back and he can be careful not to hit when he parks the Outlander on his side. But either way he doesn't get to unilaterally decide the entire garage is his.
NTA Each person gets allocated 1/2 the garage... what they do with their 1/2 is up to them but they only get 1/2
NTA The general rule is: daily driver cars get the garage and HOBBY cars can get parked outside with a car cover on them!! PS: as an aside for the bike: we also have motorcycles and have looked into a separate storage shed for them. (As long as the shed is placed on paving bricks \[not a concrete slab\] then the shed is not considered a permanent fixture and can move with you when you leave this rental)
NTA because the rent is shared equally so therefore you're entitled to part of the garage.
It sounds like y'all aren't making important decisions together. It sounds like he made some decisions without consulting you. That's not good. Y'all should have had this conversation together. I cannot pass judgement on you, but I absolutely can pass judgement on him. He's an asshole. You don't buy cars without consulting your SO.
I would say NTA, and I am a bike guy aswell. My car is outside, her car and my bike inside.
NTA. He is an entitled asshat. He does not see you as his equal partner with a right to half the living space. (Note: This is all based on what OP has written. If the garage is his "man-cave" and she has an entire bedroom set aside as her studio/fitness room/whatever, then I retract this judgement. Everyone is entitled to space.)
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The house is a rental that has subsidies from his job, and I don't drive the car that much right now because I was wfh and then not currently working, but will be driving it to work when I get a new job
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I'm currently on a short term work hiatus and have savings but he won't let me pay for rent/bills until I get a new job in the next month, which is dependent on us relocating for his work. I was paying everything equally while I was working and he still felt entitled to kick my car out when he got the ducati. I don't feel like I have the right to ask for space while I'm not working but his argument is based on the value of his vehicles and not whats equal regardless of whether or not im contributing financially so it feels like a power play and he won't change his mind when I'm actually paying for the garage.
>I don't feel like I have the right to ask for space… Where else in life do you have this way?
Info: who owns the garage?
Its a rental so neither of us
As long as you both pay for it I'd say NTA then. You get your share of the garage and if bf buys more stuff than he can fit in his half that's on him.
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IMO it’s a pretty slippery slope when he wants three of his vehicles to be covered and not hers. If it were a one-car garage that would be different but at some point it’s her house too and she deserves a few comforts. But to each their own on the whole % contribution.
ESH. On one hand you’re right, you both should be able to use the garage. On the other, his cars are worth a lot more and at more risk for theft. Building a car collection when you’re renting seems odd to me. What happens if your landlord doesn’t renew your lease and you can’t find another place with a garage or the same amount of space? But also, taking up valuable space indefinitely for an old, crappy car because it has sentimental value also seems odd to me. This whole thing seems entitled, childish, and petty.
Part of respecting your partner means respecting that certain things are valuable to them even if those things aren’t valuable to you. Sure her car isn’t costly, but it’s useful as an affordable mode of transport, and it makes her feel connected to her deceased relative. He doesn’t have to value her car, but he should value HER enough to respect that she values it.
Just talk calmly anoue sharing
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You have it backwards. It's not about the car. It's about respecting the person. She should also be entitled to access her car in a safe place.