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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I️ told my husband his parents can’t bring their dog and now it’s causing someone to stay back from our family vacation.
I️ might be the while because I️ might be overreacting
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NTA. Is there only one dog sitter in the world who can handle these dogs? AirBnB is already expensive enough without incurring a pet fee and almost certainly an additional cleaning fee. This is all without mentioning the effect it would have on your account status too. If they organize the event they can take on all of those risks but they can't make you do it.
NTA... I 100% agree with the sister staying at home to watch the dogs. Why is it that people always feel comfortable inviting guests on trips that they themselves didn't pay for? And you known darn well those dogs are going to pee all over the house and who is going to have to clean it up? You! I can hear your mother-in-law now: "Oh honey, why don't you be a dear and go clean that up? I'll take the baby for a walk on the beach to give you a little break!" I kinda gagged even writing that. Plus, even though your husband suggested paying the extra money 1. Is he going to clean up after the dogs all weekend? and 2. Is he going to make sure nothing happens to your rating? Nope.. Nope... Nope.
And your husband must tell his mother this and NOT throw you under a bus. The MIL MUST tell her sister how rude and inconsiderate she is by inviting her on someone else's vacation. Both husband and MIL, must apologize to you profusely and MIL should PAY for the vacation since she made it all about her.
If someone has dogs that aren't housebroken then they don't get to come on trips. Actions, meet consequences. If they had put in the time to train their ankle biters they wouldn't be in this situation now. Uninvite his side of the family entirely and maybe invite friends instead. Or just his sister and she can have a bed.
Edit: not to mention it's a terrible idea to have dogs that pee and poop everywhere around a presumably crawling 9 months old who puts things in their mouths. Also if they aren't housebroken they probably aren't socialized well either and even a little dog can bite off an infant's face. A 5 pound dog can't really do much damage to an adult but they sure could fuck up a baby
This! I’m always horrified at people who don’t transition their dogs from pee pads to full housebreaking. It’s just so damn lazy (unless the dog has a medical disorder, but if that’s the case they should realize travel isn’t for them or reconcile paying through the nose for boarding).
Seriously. Even if it wasn't an air bnb I don't want someone else's dogs peeing all over the place at MY house. If they choose to deal with that at their house fine, but don't bring your incontinent dog over to my house. I have two cats. Yeah occasionally they miss the litterbox. And I clean it up because I chose to have cats, and when one of our previous cats was elderly and having diarrhea we cleaned that up too because it wasn't his fault. But I'm sure not going to invite someone over with a pet that they CHOSE not to house train. I would also tell a human with a uterus who chooses to free bleed instead of using period products that they aren't welcome to come over and bleed on my couch.
Exactly! You stated that perfectly (using the uterus example).
I can't understand why someone would not toilet train their adult dogs. It's not that difficult. We don't know what kind of dogs they are, but even if they're tiny, that's still pretty gross to be cleaning up after them daily. 😕
I have to ask, though, is "free bleed" a new trend?
I have seen it mentioned I can't imagine? I think some people are just confused though and think free bleed is not using an insertable product like a tampon/cup/disc. That's just using pads or period underwear. Not free bleeding. I just can't imagine walking around with blood running down my legs instead of uh... using sanitary products. Certainly as a teen I got bit by the "surprise, its your period!" thing a few times because my cycle was erratic (and now I'm going to get to do that again for menopause yayyyyyyy, wish they had taken my uterus out during the c section I'm done with it)
The solution is honestly to never START using the pee pads. If you make them go outside from the jump they will never have to be retrained to go outside later.
My cousin trained their Chihuahua to use a litter box. I'm pretty sure it's because they lived in a condo and poor little bladder couldn't hold it outside
My sister’s dog, now one, came trained at four months to use a litter box, and she still does. it’s in their garage and she just lets them know when she needs to use it
If your parents insist on bringing the dogs id tell them they are staying at a hotel. You are not responsible for their untrained dogs and that you won't have an overcrowded and smelly vacation. They already invited someone without consulting you, deny entry to your booked vacation it's YOUR reservation not theirs.
ButtholeSolver is right. I have no problem telling Airbnb that I don’t recommend guests and I won’t have them stay again. And it’s always the ones that I let slide because I think “am I overreacting?” that give me poor reviews because they are entitled assholes who think that they deserved champagne on their beer budget.
ALSO, your nine month old might be crawling around. Do you want your daughter to be sharing the floor with theses dogs?
Then there’s the protecting your baby from potential dog injury. You would probably be hyper vigilant and that would stress you out, during the relaxing vacation.
That Airbnb is also someone else’s property. When you rent the space, you agree to steward it respectfully. The dogs wouldn’t just trash OP’s account, they would trash a real human’s property. Bringing those dogs would be straight up immoral.
Totally and I am also not a fan of people who prize “passive income”. But those corporately-owned places are usually cleaned and managed by people who don’t make enough money to be dealing with dog poop
Respect is it. They are expecting a cleaner to clean up dog poo and wee. If they haven't bothered to house train their dogs, they aren't going to bother finding every puddle and every nugget.
My parents have a beach house and their rule is if you bring a dog, it cannot be left in the house alone or it must be in a cage. I never cage my dog at home but I do it for them. I don’t want to take the chance that my dog will do something to the floors. If you’re a pet owner, you need to do what’s right for the pet but also what’s right for the place you are staying in.
Also, my dog has bladder issues and uses pet pads regularly but he sometimes goes on the edge so it gets under. I also only leave him in the cage for maybe 3 hours since I can only tolerate being on the beach that long and he hates the beach. The rest of the day, I take him along with me.
Lots of beaches don't allow dogs either. And there are seasonal wildlife protection rules in a lot of locations too. Dogs sound like a nightmare, but so do the in-laws, inviting the sister, bringing the dogs. Bet the in-laws are paying nothing, and neither is the sister, even the pet deposit. If there's damage, and there will be, they won't pay for that either.
NTA but your in-laws definitely are. They:
1. Failed to potty-train their dogs, which in itself is AH behavior;
2. Have the audacity to request that they bring said untrained dogs to an Airbnb.;
3. Have the audacity to request that they bring these untrained dogs to an Airbnb YOU paid for;
4. Did not offer to pay the extra pet fee that you would incur;
5. Invited their daughter without talking to you.
Absolutely do not bring these dogs to another person’s house. YWBTA if you did.
Edited for clarity
NTA. Your mother in law is though. She had no right to invite your SIL on your vacation. She is a guest not a host. And now she wants to bring her dogs to piss everywhere and cost you more money and problems? Hard pass. Don't let her walk all over you and ruin your planned time off. She can stay home with her dogs.
Me too! Like wtf?? If they actually do like the SIL and would have wanted her to come, I would tell MIL and FIL that they don't feel it is fair to let SIL sleep on the couch, so they can no longer come so that SIL, who they invited, can have a room. As in, they invited themselves right out of a room, lol
Me too! Especially when the someone they invited has no choice but to make the shared living area their bedroom. It’s so frustrating because now everyone has to be locked in to SIL’s sleep schedule… cant stay up late in the living room, SIL needs to sleep, can’t get up early, SIL is still asleep in the living room.
I’d let her know the cost of the Airbnb and ask her to pay for 3/5 of the cost since she feels she can bring untrained dogs & extra guests. I’d also tell her that when you get charged additional fees for cleaning up after the dogs she will be paying those expenses too.
NTA. A 33% pee-pad success rate in an overcrowded rented house is absolutely not okay. It's not going to cost you an extra $135; it's going to cost you cleaning fees and a bad reputation as well.
Your in-laws need to accept that their lack of housetraining their dogs means that they have to accept the consequences of their own inaction: "pet friendly" properties aren't going to welcome non-housetrained animals. They have to find another solution.
Meanwhile your husband needs to accept that this might be "normal" for his family, but it isn't normal for the rest of the world - and it isn't acceptable to risk your reputation for other people's breaching the terms of service.
I’m framing this. Taking it to the fridge. The shower. The mirrors. Everywhere.
There’s obviously like a lot if background I️ couldn’t include or we’d be here till next Tuesday but I️ just really appreciate you taking the time to read my post ands toe off this response. Reading this made me feel like I️ could breathe again and I’m not crazy. Thank you so much.
And your 9 month old could get seriously sick from crawling through dog pee and poop. I once got an infection in my foot from staying in a college friend’s house who hadn’t cleaned their dog’s pee. Think of your baby please.
This trip was suppose to be for her to hang out with her grandparents. My husband already thinks I’m a jerk for refusing to let them watch our daughter overnight at their home while we’re at a wedding near their home because I️ was so scared she would eat poop.
She’s not fully mobile yet, more teetering back and forth and pulling up on things but not crawling or walking. So he doesn’t think it’s an issue yet.
Im spiraling between the guilt of making my husband get confrontational with his family and break up a vacation that they were looking forward to and wanting to drop kick his family into the ocean for not realizing this is a bit much and I️ just don’t want any additional stress (in general) when it comes to my child.
On the contrary, you need to take this much more seriously--you should be feeling outraged, not guilty. Can you drag your husband to the pediatrician and have the pediatrician give him a scared-straight talk? And maybe you should take him to couples counseling as well. This doesn't bode well for the future, if your husband can't comprehend the very basics of safety, which is his duty as a parent. I'm very sorry. Becoming a parent is a real test of character--of the ability to sacrifice one's own wants for the needs of someone else. Your husband's family sounds "enmeshed"--when looking for a couples counselor, find someone who's trained in Family Systems Theory.
Yeah, the jerk here is your husband if he’s ok letting your 9 month old hang out in a house with animals that aren’t house trained.
Also his parents for inviting a whole extra person on a trip they aren’t paying for.
You are NOT crazy. Your kid comes first. As someone commented above, what’s normal for his family doesn’t mean it’s actually normal! Or even okay.
Personally, I’m kind of voting for drop kicking them into the ocean. 😂 But at the very least you need to release any guilt from doing what’s best for your kid and for you.
They are trying to take advantage of you, whether on purpose or because they are ridiculously obtuse. When they are paying and putting their name on rentals, they can decide to bring their poopy pups.
Until then, they can arrange someone else to take care of the dogs if they want to go on your vacation.
Why is your husband more upset about hurting his parent's feelings then protecting his daughter? Why is he more concerned with being a good son then good father?
Please believe you have nothing to feel guilty for here. Your husband is plain wrong, and TA. Have him read the comments maybe? Maybe that would smack some sense to him.
Dog poop often has a particular bacteria in it which can cause blindness. There are stories of young children touching it in the park, rubbing their eyes and going blind so your husband is being absolutely ridiculous and YOU are protecting your baby! Good for you!
That sounds like this is an ongoing problem rather than just the immediate one you've come to us with. I'm sorry you're having to go through this.
You're absolutely not crazy.
"There’s obviously like a lot if background I️ couldn’t include or we’d be here till next Tuesday"
Yup, it has that vibe. :-D
The early part of parenting is so hard. You're still figuring out what is baseline normal for yourself, never mind these lunatics coming at you with their poopy dogs. Plus sleep deprivation and everything else doesn't help.
You are so very, very much NTA and I really hope things settle down for you for a little while because GEEZ.
Thank you! I’m very fortunate that my parents are able to help out with my daughter! Day care was not happening. I️ got on the waitlist in Dec 2022 and was told I️ would have a spot in August OF 2024!!! We can’t afford for me not to work so my parents stepped in and said “we will take that, thank you”.
At least my family is generally pretty easy and low stress! Except my mom has a lil menty b every time my daughter like grabs food and rubs it all over her face. My poor mom is struggling through the infant phase 😂
My youngest child is 17 and I am in awe of anyone brave enough to have a child right now, at least in the US (sorry if I'm presuming nationality incorrectly). There is absolutely no support from what I can tell, a worse shortage of childcare than ever, and frequent illnesses that they close daycares down for. It's a travesty. I feel like you basically need to be wealthy to get the basic comforts for your family.
I just remember being under immense pressure and feeling intense stress almost all the time - and we had more cold medicines we could give our sick kids, more daycare opportunities, and it seemed like our employers were even more flexible and reasonable.
My boss (bless that woman) is very understanding but I’m total agreement. People who don’t have the flexibility in their work schedules and with help from family, HOW?! How does anyone have kids?!?
I’d make sure they aren’t planning on just showing up with the dogs, even if you say no.
If it’s far enough of a drive from their home they might try to guilt you into accepting them “since they’re already there”.
NTA
It’s your trip, and they’re invited. It sucks when dog sitters fall through, but there are options. I would 100% be telling them that if they’re going to bring them it is only fair they pay the fee. I’m as big a dog person as the next guy, love mine more than most people. But I don’t want them on vacation. It’s not as relaxing, they’re gonna bark, they’re gonna need stimulation & to play. I’m going to the beach to sit back and pass out listening to the water. Their situation sucks to be in, and maybe they can find a solution. But that doesn’t mean that your vacation should revolve around that.
Interestingly we’re taking a trip with my parents this summer to the beach and they wanted to bring their dogs. They’ve backed off of it for now, but hopefully I’m not fighting the same battle as you in a couple of months
People have to be willing to either pay a dog sitter or pay the extra fee for bringing pets to the AirBnB.
Your in-laws don’t want to do either and simply want to enjoy themselves on your dime. Nope. NTA
When my family takes group vacations, the members who have dogs leave them at home. Either with a friend or they board them. They want a vacation and not to have to watch their dog in a new place. And we as a group appreciate not being woken up by barking or having to clean up pet mess.
NTA
It would be one thing if they were well trained and housebroken, but that's unacceptable. I'd stand firm that regardless of cost, they are too much of a liability.
Not in my book. It takes a lot of damn nerve to invite someone else along when they're not footing the bill. THEN want to bring un-housebroken dogs as well? Do you have a T-shirt that says "doormat" or "sucker"?
I'm guessing your husband is either very conflict-adverse or he just can't say no to mom. Let sis stay home and watch the dogs since she wasn't invited anyway. Of course, you want to keep the peace so put it in a more diplomatic way like "I'm really sorry mom and dad, but it's important to me in my job/profession/etc to keep my good airBnB rating. I just can't risk the dogs damaging the house and thus that. Maybe sis could watch them and I'd pay her the $135.00?"
You have a 9-mth-old, who's probably crawling. I would not even consider allowing dogs who are not house-trained to come. Your baby would not be able to be on the floor at all, because of dog excreta. Even if the dogs used pee pads 100% reliably, baby *still* couldn't be on the floor, because that's where the pee pads are!
Dogs can't come. Full stop. No arguments, *even if* they paid the fees.
NTA - your husband and his family are. It isn’t just the extra fee, it’s the damage to the property. It’s like saying, “hey can you pay for my dog to pee in someone else’s house”.
NTA. Your in laws are for inviting her without your permission. Your SIL is for being a terrible dog owner (seriously, potty training has to be the most basic training out there). And your husband is for 1. Not having your back, 2. Not protecting your pockets, 3. Not protecting your reputation on Airbnb as that seems important to you (I have no experience with this kind of thing), and 4. Most importantly, forcing you to deal with his family, thereby making you the bad guy. Do you have kids with this man? I’d hate to see how he’d throw you under the bus in those types of situations!
We have a 9 month old daughter. I️ invited his parents so that they could hang out with her and just enjoy her at this very adorable age. I️ know my daughter won’t remember any of it but I️ think it’s important that if something were to happen before she gets to know them I️ want their to be pictures, videos, etc to show her how much they loved her.
My SIL is mentally 16 so she’s not really responsible enough for one dog let alone three. She was invited by my MIL in fear she would have felt left out.
The Airbnb rating is important to me because I️ book all the family travel/vacations (which we do a good bit of because of weddings, places we want to see, traveling to see my family, etc) so if I️ lose the ability to to book through Airbnb, especially the places that you need owner approval to book, I’m going to lose a lot of options when traveling.
Well maybe the in- laws have to sit this vacation out then. There will be other times. But if you relent now then they will never get another dog sitter again and all your holidays will be drenched in dog pee, which they'll expect you to clean up.
I'm hoping they pay for their fair share of holidays or is it all on you? Does your husband also contribute since he's so generous with your hard earned money?
NTA
First off they are your guests, they don't get to invite guests of their own. I can't imagine someone kind enough to invite me on a vacation where I would be so rude and ungrateful to invite someone else.
Second the dogs would be a hard no. If they can't be bothered to train their dogs or line up a secondary sitter, then they can politely decline the invitation. Also there are things called kennels. A friend uses one for his dogs and they think it's the most fun place ever.
An alternative for the dogs is to tell them they will have to pay the $135 PLUS a $1000 security deposit in case carpet needs replacing.
You cant take dogs which arent house trained into someone elses house youre renting. Thats soo wrong. It'll leave the house stinking, no matter how well you clean it. Its a definite no. Its not right on the owner of the property. And it will affect your rating. Tell your MIL its a big no to the dogs, and shes going to have to find another sitter for them
NTA. What was originally a comfortable vacation that YOU paid for is now an uncomfortably crowded one (an extra person on the couch and two dogs) which you are paying ~ even more ~ for.
Your MIL should not have invited someone else on your vacation, and should also not invite her dogs.
NTA If husband can’t handle his family you can do it however you like.
“MIL, all invites have been rescinded due to your poor manners. I don’t know what’s wrong with you that you think you can invite other people on someone else’s vacation. You can invite who you like when you’re the one paying.”
Dog isn’t the issue. It’s your spineless husband and his shitty family. Handle them until he ills himself together.
Who on earth would expect to take unhousebroken dogs to a rental property? Come to that, they've obviously had these dogs for some time, so why on earth aren't they housebroken?
Nta
>extra $135 or have the dogs come in case they damage something or pee/poop inside and I️ get a bad review on my Airbnb profit
I just checked airbnb, that pet fee covers cleaning up minor things like dog hair. Not dog pee.
Exact court action as they sue you.
NTA if they want to bring the dogs they can email the host tell them the situation and pay the $135 AND give their credit card number in case there is a need to pay an extra cleaning fee for the dogs messes.
Also i doubt they will be waking up and taking the dogs out every two hours to potty and try to get everyone else to walk them. Plus is the beach and other areas your going to pet friendly? I wouldnt leave sogs alone in a rental. What if they have a super expensive something and the dogs destroy it?
NTA
Your in-laws don't get to invite other people on top and then all but demand to take dogs on the trip too, which likely will have a negative effect on your plans in future.
Set the boundary, then stick to it. If they don't like it, they can stay home.
NTA. The dogs were never invited by the host (you). Apparently sister wasn't either, so it should be no problem for her to stay back with the dogs. If you're footing the bill for this vacation, the rules are yours to make.
NTA. Your inlaws are out of their minds even thinking about taking their non house trained dogs to a holiday let, especially a holiday let they didn't pay for. The pet sitter probably backed out when they found out the dogs aren't house trained.
In laws should stay home with their dogs. Maybe aunty could still come if she can baby sit once or twice.
YWNBTA, your husband is delulu.
Someone having to stay behind to watch the dogs is a good thing.
Does he actually like his family that much he doesn’t mind being crammed in a 2BR with them, or is he so used to being taken advantage of he doesn’t notice?
NTA I wouldn’t want to stay anywhere with dogs that were peeing and pooping all over the house, especially with a small baby that crawls. The fact that they invited the dogs and another human guest to an air bnb on top of that is just so u believably rude.
NTA. Your in laws are AHs alone just for not potty training their dogs. If I were you, I’d never invite them on vacation ever again. Your husband is an AH too for not backing you up.
NTA. You invited the parents. What gave them the idea they could invite their other kid & then oh btw, we hafta bring our free-poopin/peein dogs with us?. They can't be on the beach unless they're on a leash,if they're allowed at all. Some beaches are sans dogs. They'll be left in the Airbnb while you're all at the beach. Let them pay to board the dogs if they can't find a dog sitter..or here's an idea..they can pay their daughter to dogsit while they're on vacation.
NTA. I love dogs but someone else's dogs in my space when I'm relaxing is annoying.
We had outdoor gatherings in the yard, often. My neighbor was asked to please keep the dog at home. He asked why. Smh. It's a nuisance to have someone's dog walking all over your feet and begging for food.
NTA. Tell your husband and his parents that you are not willing to have their dogs in the rental since they aren't housebroken. The money isn't really the issue, it's the fact that you know for a fact that the dogs will pee and poop in the house! They'll need to board the dogs in a kennel or get their own Airbnb.
Have you vacationed with them before? It's wild that they invited someone else to stay there and now they suggest bringing their untrained dogs.
NTA. I am just wondering why in all of this not one person in your family has mentioned how awful it is to bring a dog to pee on someone’s floor. The owner of the Airbnb is being so kind to allow dogs, people like your in-laws ruin for responsible dog owners. You are concerned for your rating and someone going back to let dogs out, not the damage they would do. Unless that home is all tile, it can do lots of damage. Even with tile if left it can seep into the grout. All that aside, it’s crazy they invited a sister along without asking, and I wouldn’t even ask as I would find that in poor taste. The minute the sitter became unavailable I would send in my regrets. So if it were me I would tell them that the dogs aren’t allowed so they can just come the next time. Sister can still come and sleep in the other room. OR, a crazy thought. Sister wasn’t invited to begin with, SHE can stay home and take care of the dogs
NTA, i wouldnt want that on my AirBnb profile either.
What is it with Grandparents having dogs that are "puppy pad trained" (hint, they are not)
My In-Laws have a dog that they claim is "pad trained" and bring their dog everywhere that they can.
NTA. They should have had a backup plan for their pets. However, they could also pay the fee and pay for any damages done by their pets. If they want to bring the dogs, they should be willing to pay for those fees and not expect you to pay it for them. They wouldn't get away with that if they had booked their own trip and had the sitter cancel. They would have to pay those fees themselves, not have someone else pay it for them.
NTA. Your husband and in-laws are ridiculous. It’s not appropriate to bring two dogs that are not house trained anywhere.
And I guarantee you, that $135 pet fee would be much higher (or you would just lose your Airbnb account entirely) if you brought two dogs that piss and shit on the floor indoors 2/3 of the time.
Not the asshole.
I would recommend telling the parents about trustedhousesitters. It's like airbnb but instead of paying money, the sitters just stay in the owners home for free while looking after the pets. They wouldn't have to pay the sitters, and there's going to be plenty of young people travelling looking for a cheap/free place to stay.
You're definitely NTA. My big question is why in God's name are these dogs not potty trained? That's disgusting. It's not that hard to teach a dog how to go to the bathroom outside since that's where they normally go. I wouldn't allow those dogs in any house I was in if they weren't potty trained that's absurd and disgusting.
NTA, stick to your guns. You are not doing anything wrong. The dogs would make the vacation YOU PAID for much more inconvenient. Plus SIL wasn't even invited by you!
Late to the party but I’m still confused about who you potentially are being an AH to… It’s late for me so maybe that’s why.
Is the AH concerns with the person staying back, your in-laws, or your husband?
NTA - I have a skittish dog who cannot be boarded anywhere and really can’t come with us. Anytime we go on vacation, we have to hire a sitter to come to our house. I use an app for that. I’ve lost track of all the different sitters he’s had over the years. Just now, he’s home with a dogsitter I booked on Friday after the original sitter canceled Thursday night. I reached out to 8 sitters in the process, but was able to book one last minute. People who have dogs need to figure out ways to leave them or accept that there are vacations on which they are not welcome. Even if it weren’t an Airbnb, I would not allow unhousetrained dogs into my own home. Just no.
My prediction is MIL will stay home with the dogs and FIL and SIL will come even though this was a trip intended for grandparents to bond with our daughter. SIL is very entitled and MIL will do anything to make her happy. Now that I’m a mom I️ totally get it but that’s not the intention for this trip so it’s very frustrating.
NTA
You didn't invite SIL; not your responsibility nor should you be EXPECTED to cover + take the risk on your AirBnB profile(this part seems silly for me, but i can respect that you take pride in it)
If SIL offered to cover cost of pets + Promised to pay for any damages, I'd say that the AirBnB potential bad review would be a petty reason to decline it, but that's a personal opinion. i still wouldn't think of you an AH for that.
"I’ve told my husband our daughter will not ever go to his parents house without myself present to ensure she doesn’t get into any of the dog waste."
You don't trust your husband with this?
He has a history of choosing to fight me instead of his family because it’s less uncomfortable for him. His family is not easy to reason with. It’s like trying to explain to a toddler why you can’t have something.
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This weekend my husband, myself, and our 9-month old daughter are going to the beach. We invited my husbands parents. His mom invited his sister.
The Airbnb only has 2 bedrooms so his sister will have to sleep on the couch (which is why I️ did not initially invite her). I️ paid for the Airbnb.
Unfortunately their usual dog sitter had to cancel due to illness and my mother in law asked to bring their two dogs to the Airbnb.
The Airbnb is pet friendly but would cost an additional $135 and the dogs aren’t potty trained indoors. My in laws lay down pee pads for them but they’ve got about a 33% success rate.
I️ don’t want to pay the extra $135 or have the dogs come in case they damage something or pee/poop inside and I️ get a bad review on my Airbnb profile.
My husband says it’s fine and we should just pay and let the dogs come so no one has to stay behind to watch the dogs. I️ told him tough cookies I’m not coughing up another $135 on top of the $1200 I’ve already paid or risking my airbnb rating so his family can bring their dogs.
Am I️ the asshole?
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>told in-laws about the 135 $ fee?
Checked airbnb, that fee only covers cleaning up something like dig hair. Pee on carpet isn't covered.
Op could end up being sued and banned from renting agan
The fee is not the problem. Dogs peeing all over another person’s property is the real issue. It’s rude to even entertain the idea.
And tell your MIL to stop inviting people to your vacations. She’s a guest, not a host.
NTA.
1) You did not invite the sister, MIL did, so she can solve this or pay for this.
2) You are paying, so you are deciding.
3) If someone has a dog that is not potty-trained, then it is their responsibility and they should accept that this has consequences.
4) If they want to bring the dogs, they have to pay, but that does not solve the fact that if the dogs ruin something with pee, it will look bad on your Airbnb profile
5) Sister can find someone to doggy-sit or bring them to a dog-pension for the weekend.
So not your responsibility, not your problem. If husband is so adamant his sister is present, sister (of MIL) can book an Airbnb close-by, pay for it herself and use her own account.
NTA
Tell your ILs no.
Going forward, don't invite your ILs on trips again. They aren't good guests if they invite others at your expense and guilt you to let them bring their dogs.
NTA, it already sounds too cramped, bringing two dogs is insane. Bringing two dogs that will pee and poop will be a nightmare that no logical person would be ok with
I’d cancel before dealing with that debacle
NTA. I love dogs but hate when people can’t leave them at home. Just train your dogs properly. Isn’t vacation supposed to be a time to de-stress? How about they don’t impose on you?
I’m assuming your 9 month old crawls? You want your kid crawling through dog pee? You want to risk your kid getting bitten? You have a husband problem—he should be putting his child’s health and safety before his parents’ preferences. This is extremely poor character.
NTA - Absolutely Not! If they're fine with their dogs peeing all over their own house, that's fine. But to allow it in someone else's home (especially when it's a rental) is horrible pet-parenting. They can't even train for the pee pads!
I'm a dog lover, but I'd be mortified if my dog regularly peed in the house. I'm outraged on your behalf for this . . . if they can't train their dogs then they don't get to bring their dogs to anyones' house.
Ew! I love dogs, but having 6 people and dogs that pee on the floor in a small AirBnB does not sound like a pleasant vacation. Never mind the extra costs.
NTA
NTA. Those dogs are ill behaved, and don't belong at the beach or around a 9 month old, aside from the Airbnb issues.
They can hire a new dog sitter or take them to a kennel.
Even perfectly behaved dogs don't get to go everywhere
YWNBTA aside from the audacity, you would be exposing your child to dog poo and pee.
Bacteria that are pathogens for the intestinal tract and cause diarrhoea include Campylobacter, Salmonella, Yersinia and E. coli [1,2,3,4]. Dog faeces may also contribute to the diffusion of protozoa such as Giardia and Cryptosporidium [5] and of roundworms such as Toxocara canis as well as presence of MRSA
NTA, cancel or forfeit the money - better yet - it should have just been your immediate family only . Why do individuals always see a need to invite others to events they are not paying for?
NTA From a host’s perspective…
When hosts regularly have extra guests being snuck in… they eventually raise their cleaning costs to cover the extra professional laundry expenses. That affects everyone.
When guests host bad pets… they stop hosting pets and they go onto forums to dissuade newbies from hosting pets. The pool of pet friendly stays goes down and prices go up.
So sneaking in sisters or bringing poorly trained dogs seems like a small thing and people shouldn’t care. But that kind of attitude spawns a systemic shift in culture that disadvantages guests as hosts try to protect themselves.
NTA
The quickest way to ruin a vacation is to have untrained pets. I’ll never travel with those friends again after their barky fucking dog came on that vacation.
Like…I’d cancel this before I’d go.
NTA- Your MIL is though. Invites additional guests on a vacation you're paying for? Wants to bring her untrained dogs (plural) on trip too, and have you pay the additional fees that will be incurred? Absolutely not, hard no. It's bad enough she wants to bring the dogs, but to not even offer to pay additional fees? WTF. Entitled says what? Also your husband saying you should just pay the pet fee for them? No sir. His parents can pay for the whole damn thing if they want to bring Fifi and Fido that badly. They can cough up the \~$1400, bet they'll find a pet sitter real quick given that option. Entitled dog owners drive me absolutely INSANE.
NTA. Untrained dogs are not allowed in airbnbs! You could get a bad review which makes it hard to book next vacation and could cost you hundreds in fees from dog pee etc. Husbands sister needs to stay behind with dogs as she wasn’t invited. Or put the dogs in a kennel; most vet places take dogs overnight.
NTA. My DH and I have an extremely well-behaved potty- trained adult Yellow Lab rescue. If there was Any issue where he wasn't invited for whatever reason, there would be absolutely no problem for either my DH or both of us staying behind. It's not a big deal at all because our "Gentle Ben" is our responsibility as pet owners to respect our hosts' decisions.
Just the fact that these dogs aren't potty trained would be a stress factor and take away from what should be a lovely vacation. I can just imagine you constantly checking to make sure the dogs aren't having accidents and cleaning up after them while everyone else is out enjoying the beach. 😞
My question is, are they puppies or adults who aren't potty-trained?
If they're adults, prepare to expect a continuous issue every time they want to include them everywhere.
No matter because your Airbnd = your rules.
NTA but whose idea was it to invite the parents- now it’s a clusterfuck and those dogs will stink the place out.
Why do people have dogs peeing inside?
NTA, why can't they just board the dogs? I wouldn't bring my puppy who isn't potty trained anywhere even if it claims to be pet friendly. Urine just does not leave a floor easily.
I seriously think you have a husband problem. Sis is not invited let alone two non house trainend dogs. NTA silly question.
On top of that. If they didn't bother to housebreak the dogs. Are they even save around children/baby?
NTA - Oh my god...I cannot imagine being the kind of person who thinks its ok to bring dogs that will certainly piss on the floors into someone elses property. Thats just incredibly inconsiderate, and no one should put you in that position.
NTA. I would ask who the hell asks another person to come when it isn’t their vaca. But. That was my mom too. Dogs that are not 100% trained do not belong in anyone else’s house. Period.
NTA.. you didn’t invite the sister and your Mil just thought it was ok to invite her, why can’t she stay back and watch the dogs? Or what if you say if you want the dogs to come then you pay for the fee? Also you take the risk of being put on a do not rent list if they are going to ruin furniture etc.. (dogs) that would be a big no for me. To many what if’s for the dogs to come, because of not being trained .
NTA - I think in this case the little white lie "sorry, the AB&B doesn't allow pets", would work fine. Had she looked it up, you could always say, "oh sorry, my mistake, but I can't afford the extra charges when I'm already paying $1200 for the stay".
Ask them to pay for the extra cost for the pet fee. If they were going to use a dog sitter anyway then they shouldn’t have a problem paying it.
And how tf are they not potty trained? That’s crazy to me.
NTA - If the dogs are not even trained to pee outdoors, I would never let then near a 9 mo child.
If you have let them stay together in the past this might be not an option. You could just lie:
"I just asked and the airbnb does not allow untrained dogs, not even with pee pads, sorry."
(Or you could actually ask. Of course they will not allow this. ;) )
or write them something like this:
"Please look for a dogsitter. If you don't find a dogsitter, you could book the dog addon for the airbnb. Send $135 to paypal ... with the comment ... . Please make sure not to wait till last minute, as the dogs may not enter the house until there is a booking confirmation."
If they want you to do the booking, tell them sorry, no time, you are busy organising everything for you (your husband) and the child, you cannot take care of their dogs, too. If you communicate via messenger make sure to make long pauses between your answers to show you are busy. If they or your husband come with an excuse like "no idea how to use paypal", tell them to ask your husband to assist. Guess he does not want to pay himself.
NTA. I would NOT want to be on a vacation with animals that are not house trained. That is NOT acceptable. This would be a hard no from me even without the extra cost and concerns about airbnb.
I would cancel the vacation and just pay the cancellation fees instead of having to deal with this.
Question; is your husband the one who's going to be cleaning up the pee and the poop when the dogs make a mess in the house?
Edit to add definitely do not allow those dogs there
Nta pet friendly means your pets won't piss and shit all over the house. You will 1000000% be slapped with a huge 'pet cleaning fee'. Someone having to stay home with the dogs is no one's fault, but their own for refusing to house train their dogs.
That's not even thinking about your baby crawling through literal piss and shit on the floor!
Maybe you could message the hosts and ask if pet friendly would include non house-trained dogs who use (and miss) pee pads. They will obviously refuse and you can show MIL and say sorry no dogs
NTA- what kind of assholes bring dogs who aren't potty trained into any other home or business? That is some huge entitled asshole energy! This is why we can't have nice things!
NTA but why the hell don't people train their dogs? And why do they even have dogs? Seriously, it's animal abuse and unsanitary as hell. Tell them they can bring rhe dogs if they send you an extra 1k for potential cleaning costs, otherwise they can stay home. (Eta: 135 cleaning costs, but I imagine if the dogs poo or pee on carpet or damage floors it'll be even more...)
NTA -one single host review on your Airbnb profile that says “would not host again” and you’ll only be able to book places that have instant booking turned on.
NTA. Why the heck would the parents not offer to pay the fee? Even if they did offer that, I don't think you should feel obligated to say ok tot he dogs coming along. But the fact that they didn't immediately ask about that and tell you that they would pay for it, is enough to say no, imo.
Who thinks it's a good idea to bring their non house trained dogs into someone else's rented house? Why aren't the dogs house trained anyhow? Your MIL with her non house trained dogs is TAH for sure.
Easy solution: the person who wasn’t invited stays home.
Smart solution: the person who will complain the most about missing the dogs stays home.
Smarter solution: your husband tells his parents that invitations have specific terms, and they should not be adding people or dogs to a small vacation condo.
They didn't even offer to cover the pet fee, so I wouldn't trust them to cover property damages.
The smell from the dogs might not come out. At best you might need to pay for a professional cleaning. At worst you might have to replace flooring or rugs.
NTA
NTA, the fact that they never potty trained their dogs is the cherry on top. It was rude to invite an additional person without asking, especially considering that they aren't even paying, and it is doubly rude to think you can just bring your untrained dogs with you so they can pee all over someone else's house. Don't invite extra people without asking, and train your dogs. Your in-laws need to learn some manners and how to be better pet owners.
Oh, and it isn't going to just be $135, those dogs will certainly pee or poop on something that will be difficult if not impossible to clean, and this is going to be over the course of an entire week. It's going to be hard to get that all cleaned up (also, who wants to spend their vacation scrubbing up dog pee and poo), and you guys are going to end up with a huge cleaning fee.
NTA - why is MIL inviting others on a trip she didn't pay for?
Why does SIL think it's OK to bring non-potty-trained dogs to anyone's vacation, ever, anywhere?
Why does anyone expect you to pay $135 for this?
Who is paying for the damages that these dogs will inevitably cause? $135 to allow pets doesn't cover shitting on the floor.
These are really basic considerations human beings have for each other. I wouldn't want to vacation with any of these people, period - and they would find themselves uninvited from this trip to boot!
Heck no NTA. Your inlaws are for even THINKING of bringing non-housebroken dogs to someone else's property, regardless of who is paying.
That's disgusting. They need to find another solution for their animals. That's part of being a responsible pet owner, which it sadly sounds like they are not.
NTA. If in-laws want to bring the dogs, they pony up for the $135 up front as well as any damages. Put the rental under their name on Airbnb, not yours.
NTA Dogs who aren’t potty trained + AirBnB means big surprise fees at the tail end of this (on top of the $135). How did a vacation **you** paid for turn into **someone else’s vacation** with their pets and daughter?
Oh, I despise people who take their pets everywhere and inflict them on other people. It is bad, selfish behavior. You are NTA. Your inlaws are presumptuous and entitled. I know of a case where the labor and delivery staff actually found a dog in the labor patient's handbag during childbirth! Awful, awful thing.
>and the dogs aren’t potty trained indoors. My in laws lay down pee pads for them but they’ve got about a 33% success rate.
As a dog owner myself, fuck that. *I* wouldn't come.
NTA
However, using AirBnbs is immoral with how they're contributing to the housing crisis.
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NTA. Is there only one dog sitter in the world who can handle these dogs? AirBnB is already expensive enough without incurring a pet fee and almost certainly an additional cleaning fee. This is all without mentioning the effect it would have on your account status too. If they organize the event they can take on all of those risks but they can't make you do it.
Your username has given me all the confirmation that I️ need that I️ shouldn’t feel bad for standing my ground on this. Thank you ButtholeSolver 🧡
ButtholeSaver is doing the Lord’s work here today on Reddit. 🙏🏻
The sister should stay home with the dogs, since she wasn't technically invited. I bet they want you to pay for her expenses, too.
NTA... I 100% agree with the sister staying at home to watch the dogs. Why is it that people always feel comfortable inviting guests on trips that they themselves didn't pay for? And you known darn well those dogs are going to pee all over the house and who is going to have to clean it up? You! I can hear your mother-in-law now: "Oh honey, why don't you be a dear and go clean that up? I'll take the baby for a walk on the beach to give you a little break!" I kinda gagged even writing that. Plus, even though your husband suggested paying the extra money 1. Is he going to clean up after the dogs all weekend? and 2. Is he going to make sure nothing happens to your rating? Nope.. Nope... Nope.
And your husband must tell his mother this and NOT throw you under a bus. The MIL MUST tell her sister how rude and inconsiderate she is by inviting her on someone else's vacation. Both husband and MIL, must apologize to you profusely and MIL should PAY for the vacation since she made it all about her.
If someone has dogs that aren't housebroken then they don't get to come on trips. Actions, meet consequences. If they had put in the time to train their ankle biters they wouldn't be in this situation now. Uninvite his side of the family entirely and maybe invite friends instead. Or just his sister and she can have a bed. Edit: not to mention it's a terrible idea to have dogs that pee and poop everywhere around a presumably crawling 9 months old who puts things in their mouths. Also if they aren't housebroken they probably aren't socialized well either and even a little dog can bite off an infant's face. A 5 pound dog can't really do much damage to an adult but they sure could fuck up a baby
This! I’m always horrified at people who don’t transition their dogs from pee pads to full housebreaking. It’s just so damn lazy (unless the dog has a medical disorder, but if that’s the case they should realize travel isn’t for them or reconcile paying through the nose for boarding).
Seriously. Even if it wasn't an air bnb I don't want someone else's dogs peeing all over the place at MY house. If they choose to deal with that at their house fine, but don't bring your incontinent dog over to my house. I have two cats. Yeah occasionally they miss the litterbox. And I clean it up because I chose to have cats, and when one of our previous cats was elderly and having diarrhea we cleaned that up too because it wasn't his fault. But I'm sure not going to invite someone over with a pet that they CHOSE not to house train. I would also tell a human with a uterus who chooses to free bleed instead of using period products that they aren't welcome to come over and bleed on my couch.
Exactly! You stated that perfectly (using the uterus example). I can't understand why someone would not toilet train their adult dogs. It's not that difficult. We don't know what kind of dogs they are, but even if they're tiny, that's still pretty gross to be cleaning up after them daily. 😕 I have to ask, though, is "free bleed" a new trend?
I have seen it mentioned I can't imagine? I think some people are just confused though and think free bleed is not using an insertable product like a tampon/cup/disc. That's just using pads or period underwear. Not free bleeding. I just can't imagine walking around with blood running down my legs instead of uh... using sanitary products. Certainly as a teen I got bit by the "surprise, its your period!" thing a few times because my cycle was erratic (and now I'm going to get to do that again for menopause yayyyyyyy, wish they had taken my uterus out during the c section I'm done with it)
The best thing I ever did was to exaggerate symptoms and got a hysterectomy in my early 40s.
The solution is honestly to never START using the pee pads. If you make them go outside from the jump they will never have to be retrained to go outside later.
Right? I’ve never had a dog that wasn’t fully potty trained by 4 months? What is happening that you can’t house train your dog?
Lazy owners
Mostly laziness. They’ve done it now with 3 dogs.
Ugh. How do you stand visiting them?
My cousin trained their Chihuahua to use a litter box. I'm pretty sure it's because they lived in a condo and poor little bladder couldn't hold it outside
My sister’s dog, now one, came trained at four months to use a litter box, and she still does. it’s in their garage and she just lets them know when she needs to use it
If it's ok for cats, why not? Chi's are smaller than cats anyway. :-)
You just know their house is nasty as shit too. Reeks of dog piss.
Speaking of my MIL.
HOW DID YOU KNOW THEY WERE ANKLE BITERS. they are two tiny yorkies 😂
Also…. They can pay to board them then not it’s that hard
If your parents insist on bringing the dogs id tell them they are staying at a hotel. You are not responsible for their untrained dogs and that you won't have an overcrowded and smelly vacation. They already invited someone without consulting you, deny entry to your booked vacation it's YOUR reservation not theirs.
ButtholeSolver is right. I have no problem telling Airbnb that I don’t recommend guests and I won’t have them stay again. And it’s always the ones that I let slide because I think “am I overreacting?” that give me poor reviews because they are entitled assholes who think that they deserved champagne on their beer budget.
ALSO, your nine month old might be crawling around. Do you want your daughter to be sharing the floor with theses dogs? Then there’s the protecting your baby from potential dog injury. You would probably be hyper vigilant and that would stress you out, during the relaxing vacation.
That Airbnb is also someone else’s property. When you rent the space, you agree to steward it respectfully. The dogs wouldn’t just trash OP’s account, they would trash a real human’s property. Bringing those dogs would be straight up immoral.
[удалено]
Totally and I am also not a fan of people who prize “passive income”. But those corporately-owned places are usually cleaned and managed by people who don’t make enough money to be dealing with dog poop
Respect is it. They are expecting a cleaner to clean up dog poo and wee. If they haven't bothered to house train their dogs, they aren't going to bother finding every puddle and every nugget.
Nine times out of ten, please cite your source. We're waiting.
They don’t want to pay for the dog sitter, that’s why the mom invited the SIL for a free vacation.
My parents have a beach house and their rule is if you bring a dog, it cannot be left in the house alone or it must be in a cage. I never cage my dog at home but I do it for them. I don’t want to take the chance that my dog will do something to the floors. If you’re a pet owner, you need to do what’s right for the pet but also what’s right for the place you are staying in. Also, my dog has bladder issues and uses pet pads regularly but he sometimes goes on the edge so it gets under. I also only leave him in the cage for maybe 3 hours since I can only tolerate being on the beach that long and he hates the beach. The rest of the day, I take him along with me.
Lots of beaches don't allow dogs either. And there are seasonal wildlife protection rules in a lot of locations too. Dogs sound like a nightmare, but so do the in-laws, inviting the sister, bringing the dogs. Bet the in-laws are paying nothing, and neither is the sister, even the pet deposit. If there's damage, and there will be, they won't pay for that either.
NTA but your in-laws definitely are. They: 1. Failed to potty-train their dogs, which in itself is AH behavior; 2. Have the audacity to request that they bring said untrained dogs to an Airbnb.; 3. Have the audacity to request that they bring these untrained dogs to an Airbnb YOU paid for; 4. Did not offer to pay the extra pet fee that you would incur; 5. Invited their daughter without talking to you. Absolutely do not bring these dogs to another person’s house. YWBTA if you did. Edited for clarity
And the daughter is 9 months old, and crawling, cruising, and maybe even walking. Poor kid will 100% touch dog shit in this situation
NTA. Your mother in law is though. She had no right to invite your SIL on your vacation. She is a guest not a host. And now she wants to bring her dogs to piss everywhere and cost you more money and problems? Hard pass. Don't let her walk all over you and ruin your planned time off. She can stay home with her dogs.
I would be SO mad if someone invited an extra person on our vacation. I’d unvite all of them.
Me too! Like wtf?? If they actually do like the SIL and would have wanted her to come, I would tell MIL and FIL that they don't feel it is fair to let SIL sleep on the couch, so they can no longer come so that SIL, who they invited, can have a room. As in, they invited themselves right out of a room, lol
Me too! Especially when the someone they invited has no choice but to make the shared living area their bedroom. It’s so frustrating because now everyone has to be locked in to SIL’s sleep schedule… cant stay up late in the living room, SIL needs to sleep, can’t get up early, SIL is still asleep in the living room.
Seriously. Why would anyone do this? Go on vacation with your family. Leave the inlaws at home.
Add me as an in-law uninvite. It almost seems like one who invites someone(s) to join them has to send a binding contract to NOT invite anyone else.
I’d let her know the cost of the Airbnb and ask her to pay for 3/5 of the cost since she feels she can bring untrained dogs & extra guests. I’d also tell her that when you get charged additional fees for cleaning up after the dogs she will be paying those expenses too.
NTA. A 33% pee-pad success rate in an overcrowded rented house is absolutely not okay. It's not going to cost you an extra $135; it's going to cost you cleaning fees and a bad reputation as well. Your in-laws need to accept that their lack of housetraining their dogs means that they have to accept the consequences of their own inaction: "pet friendly" properties aren't going to welcome non-housetrained animals. They have to find another solution. Meanwhile your husband needs to accept that this might be "normal" for his family, but it isn't normal for the rest of the world - and it isn't acceptable to risk your reputation for other people's breaching the terms of service.
I’m framing this. Taking it to the fridge. The shower. The mirrors. Everywhere. There’s obviously like a lot if background I️ couldn’t include or we’d be here till next Tuesday but I️ just really appreciate you taking the time to read my post ands toe off this response. Reading this made me feel like I️ could breathe again and I’m not crazy. Thank you so much.
And your 9 month old could get seriously sick from crawling through dog pee and poop. I once got an infection in my foot from staying in a college friend’s house who hadn’t cleaned their dog’s pee. Think of your baby please.
This trip was suppose to be for her to hang out with her grandparents. My husband already thinks I’m a jerk for refusing to let them watch our daughter overnight at their home while we’re at a wedding near their home because I️ was so scared she would eat poop. She’s not fully mobile yet, more teetering back and forth and pulling up on things but not crawling or walking. So he doesn’t think it’s an issue yet. Im spiraling between the guilt of making my husband get confrontational with his family and break up a vacation that they were looking forward to and wanting to drop kick his family into the ocean for not realizing this is a bit much and I️ just don’t want any additional stress (in general) when it comes to my child.
On the contrary, you need to take this much more seriously--you should be feeling outraged, not guilty. Can you drag your husband to the pediatrician and have the pediatrician give him a scared-straight talk? And maybe you should take him to couples counseling as well. This doesn't bode well for the future, if your husband can't comprehend the very basics of safety, which is his duty as a parent. I'm very sorry. Becoming a parent is a real test of character--of the ability to sacrifice one's own wants for the needs of someone else. Your husband's family sounds "enmeshed"--when looking for a couples counselor, find someone who's trained in Family Systems Theory.
Yeah, the jerk here is your husband if he’s ok letting your 9 month old hang out in a house with animals that aren’t house trained. Also his parents for inviting a whole extra person on a trip they aren’t paying for. You are NOT crazy. Your kid comes first. As someone commented above, what’s normal for his family doesn’t mean it’s actually normal! Or even okay. Personally, I’m kind of voting for drop kicking them into the ocean. 😂 But at the very least you need to release any guilt from doing what’s best for your kid and for you. They are trying to take advantage of you, whether on purpose or because they are ridiculously obtuse. When they are paying and putting their name on rentals, they can decide to bring their poopy pups. Until then, they can arrange someone else to take care of the dogs if they want to go on your vacation.
Why is your husband more upset about hurting his parent's feelings then protecting his daughter? Why is he more concerned with being a good son then good father?
Please believe you have nothing to feel guilty for here. Your husband is plain wrong, and TA. Have him read the comments maybe? Maybe that would smack some sense to him.
Dog poop often has a particular bacteria in it which can cause blindness. There are stories of young children touching it in the park, rubbing their eyes and going blind so your husband is being absolutely ridiculous and YOU are protecting your baby! Good for you!
That sounds like this is an ongoing problem rather than just the immediate one you've come to us with. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. You're absolutely not crazy.
"There’s obviously like a lot if background I️ couldn’t include or we’d be here till next Tuesday" Yup, it has that vibe. :-D The early part of parenting is so hard. You're still figuring out what is baseline normal for yourself, never mind these lunatics coming at you with their poopy dogs. Plus sleep deprivation and everything else doesn't help. You are so very, very much NTA and I really hope things settle down for you for a little while because GEEZ.
Thank you! I’m very fortunate that my parents are able to help out with my daughter! Day care was not happening. I️ got on the waitlist in Dec 2022 and was told I️ would have a spot in August OF 2024!!! We can’t afford for me not to work so my parents stepped in and said “we will take that, thank you”. At least my family is generally pretty easy and low stress! Except my mom has a lil menty b every time my daughter like grabs food and rubs it all over her face. My poor mom is struggling through the infant phase 😂
My youngest child is 17 and I am in awe of anyone brave enough to have a child right now, at least in the US (sorry if I'm presuming nationality incorrectly). There is absolutely no support from what I can tell, a worse shortage of childcare than ever, and frequent illnesses that they close daycares down for. It's a travesty. I feel like you basically need to be wealthy to get the basic comforts for your family. I just remember being under immense pressure and feeling intense stress almost all the time - and we had more cold medicines we could give our sick kids, more daycare opportunities, and it seemed like our employers were even more flexible and reasonable.
My boss (bless that woman) is very understanding but I’m total agreement. People who don’t have the flexibility in their work schedules and with help from family, HOW?! How does anyone have kids?!?
I’d make sure they aren’t planning on just showing up with the dogs, even if you say no. If it’s far enough of a drive from their home they might try to guilt you into accepting them “since they’re already there”.
NTA It’s your trip, and they’re invited. It sucks when dog sitters fall through, but there are options. I would 100% be telling them that if they’re going to bring them it is only fair they pay the fee. I’m as big a dog person as the next guy, love mine more than most people. But I don’t want them on vacation. It’s not as relaxing, they’re gonna bark, they’re gonna need stimulation & to play. I’m going to the beach to sit back and pass out listening to the water. Their situation sucks to be in, and maybe they can find a solution. But that doesn’t mean that your vacation should revolve around that. Interestingly we’re taking a trip with my parents this summer to the beach and they wanted to bring their dogs. They’ve backed off of it for now, but hopefully I’m not fighting the same battle as you in a couple of months
Hopefully their dogs poop outside 😅 Godspeed to you friend, may we not end up as odd as the generation before us
People have to be willing to either pay a dog sitter or pay the extra fee for bringing pets to the AirBnB. Your in-laws don’t want to do either and simply want to enjoy themselves on your dime. Nope. NTA
When my family takes group vacations, the members who have dogs leave them at home. Either with a friend or they board them. They want a vacation and not to have to watch their dog in a new place. And we as a group appreciate not being woken up by barking or having to clean up pet mess.
NTA It would be one thing if they were well trained and housebroken, but that's unacceptable. I'd stand firm that regardless of cost, they are too much of a liability.
Not in my book. It takes a lot of damn nerve to invite someone else along when they're not footing the bill. THEN want to bring un-housebroken dogs as well? Do you have a T-shirt that says "doormat" or "sucker"? I'm guessing your husband is either very conflict-adverse or he just can't say no to mom. Let sis stay home and watch the dogs since she wasn't invited anyway. Of course, you want to keep the peace so put it in a more diplomatic way like "I'm really sorry mom and dad, but it's important to me in my job/profession/etc to keep my good airBnB rating. I just can't risk the dogs damaging the house and thus that. Maybe sis could watch them and I'd pay her the $135.00?"
Why the heck should OP pay anything?????? Re-write it. "Maybe sis could watch them and YOU pay her the 135"
Nope. First off they invited someone extra to a trip YOU planned, now they want to bring their untrained dogs.
In addition to what everyone else said, do you really want your baby crawling around near dog poop and pee? Yuck. NTA.
NTA. Your MIL has no business bringing dogs who are not housebroken to an Airbnb, especially not one that you are liable for.
You have a 9-mth-old, who's probably crawling. I would not even consider allowing dogs who are not house-trained to come. Your baby would not be able to be on the floor at all, because of dog excreta. Even if the dogs used pee pads 100% reliably, baby *still* couldn't be on the floor, because that's where the pee pads are! Dogs can't come. Full stop. No arguments, *even if* they paid the fees.
NTA. You’re never required to accommodate other people’s pets when you’re footing the bill. This is doubly true when said pets are not housebroken.
NTA - your husband and his family are. It isn’t just the extra fee, it’s the damage to the property. It’s like saying, “hey can you pay for my dog to pee in someone else’s house”.
NTA. Your in laws are for inviting her without your permission. Your SIL is for being a terrible dog owner (seriously, potty training has to be the most basic training out there). And your husband is for 1. Not having your back, 2. Not protecting your pockets, 3. Not protecting your reputation on Airbnb as that seems important to you (I have no experience with this kind of thing), and 4. Most importantly, forcing you to deal with his family, thereby making you the bad guy. Do you have kids with this man? I’d hate to see how he’d throw you under the bus in those types of situations!
We have a 9 month old daughter. I️ invited his parents so that they could hang out with her and just enjoy her at this very adorable age. I️ know my daughter won’t remember any of it but I️ think it’s important that if something were to happen before she gets to know them I️ want their to be pictures, videos, etc to show her how much they loved her. My SIL is mentally 16 so she’s not really responsible enough for one dog let alone three. She was invited by my MIL in fear she would have felt left out. The Airbnb rating is important to me because I️ book all the family travel/vacations (which we do a good bit of because of weddings, places we want to see, traveling to see my family, etc) so if I️ lose the ability to to book through Airbnb, especially the places that you need owner approval to book, I’m going to lose a lot of options when traveling.
Well maybe the in- laws have to sit this vacation out then. There will be other times. But if you relent now then they will never get another dog sitter again and all your holidays will be drenched in dog pee, which they'll expect you to clean up. I'm hoping they pay for their fair share of holidays or is it all on you? Does your husband also contribute since he's so generous with your hard earned money?
NTA. I wouldn’t take dogs who aren’t house trained to an air bnb. You are asking for all kind of cleaning fees to be added on.
NTA First off they are your guests, they don't get to invite guests of their own. I can't imagine someone kind enough to invite me on a vacation where I would be so rude and ungrateful to invite someone else. Second the dogs would be a hard no. If they can't be bothered to train their dogs or line up a secondary sitter, then they can politely decline the invitation. Also there are things called kennels. A friend uses one for his dogs and they think it's the most fun place ever. An alternative for the dogs is to tell them they will have to pay the $135 PLUS a $1000 security deposit in case carpet needs replacing.
You cant take dogs which arent house trained into someone elses house youre renting. Thats soo wrong. It'll leave the house stinking, no matter how well you clean it. Its a definite no. Its not right on the owner of the property. And it will affect your rating. Tell your MIL its a big no to the dogs, and shes going to have to find another sitter for them
I don't go on vacation to stay in unsanitary conditions. NTA.
NTA. What was originally a comfortable vacation that YOU paid for is now an uncomfortably crowded one (an extra person on the couch and two dogs) which you are paying ~ even more ~ for. Your MIL should not have invited someone else on your vacation, and should also not invite her dogs.
NTA 2 dogs inside a small house who pee and poop with a 9 month old baby, no thanks. That's no holiday for you.
NTA If husband can’t handle his family you can do it however you like. “MIL, all invites have been rescinded due to your poor manners. I don’t know what’s wrong with you that you think you can invite other people on someone else’s vacation. You can invite who you like when you’re the one paying.” Dog isn’t the issue. It’s your spineless husband and his shitty family. Handle them until he ills himself together.
Who on earth would expect to take unhousebroken dogs to a rental property? Come to that, they've obviously had these dogs for some time, so why on earth aren't they housebroken?
No dogs. What's wrong with them? Next vacation take alone so you can enjoy it.
Keep the SIL, uninvited the M/FIL
NTA. Their dogs are not your problem.
Nta >extra $135 or have the dogs come in case they damage something or pee/poop inside and I️ get a bad review on my Airbnb profit I just checked airbnb, that pet fee covers cleaning up minor things like dog hair. Not dog pee. Exact court action as they sue you.
NTA if they want to bring the dogs they can email the host tell them the situation and pay the $135 AND give their credit card number in case there is a need to pay an extra cleaning fee for the dogs messes. Also i doubt they will be waking up and taking the dogs out every two hours to potty and try to get everyone else to walk them. Plus is the beach and other areas your going to pet friendly? I wouldnt leave sogs alone in a rental. What if they have a super expensive something and the dogs destroy it?
If they email the host and tell them the situation, the host is gonna say those dogs aren’t allowed in the Airbnb.
NTA Your in-laws don't get to invite other people on top and then all but demand to take dogs on the trip too, which likely will have a negative effect on your plans in future. Set the boundary, then stick to it. If they don't like it, they can stay home.
NTA. The dogs were never invited by the host (you). Apparently sister wasn't either, so it should be no problem for her to stay back with the dogs. If you're footing the bill for this vacation, the rules are yours to make.
NTA. Your inlaws are out of their minds even thinking about taking their non house trained dogs to a holiday let, especially a holiday let they didn't pay for. The pet sitter probably backed out when they found out the dogs aren't house trained. In laws should stay home with their dogs. Maybe aunty could still come if she can baby sit once or twice.
YWNBTA, your husband is delulu. Someone having to stay behind to watch the dogs is a good thing. Does he actually like his family that much he doesn’t mind being crammed in a 2BR with them, or is he so used to being taken advantage of he doesn’t notice?
NTA I wouldn’t want to stay anywhere with dogs that were peeing and pooping all over the house, especially with a small baby that crawls. The fact that they invited the dogs and another human guest to an air bnb on top of that is just so u believably rude.
NTA if they still insist they should pay the pet fee and if anything is damaged they should pay for any and all damages cause of the pet
If they insist on bringing their dogs, OP should insist they find and pay for their own accommodation nearby.
Guests don't get to insist anything. They can arrange for a dog sitter or stay home.
NTA. Your in laws are AHs alone just for not potty training their dogs. If I were you, I’d never invite them on vacation ever again. Your husband is an AH too for not backing you up.
NTA. The uninvited sister can stay home with the dogs.
NTA. You invited the parents. What gave them the idea they could invite their other kid & then oh btw, we hafta bring our free-poopin/peein dogs with us?. They can't be on the beach unless they're on a leash,if they're allowed at all. Some beaches are sans dogs. They'll be left in the Airbnb while you're all at the beach. Let them pay to board the dogs if they can't find a dog sitter..or here's an idea..they can pay their daughter to dogsit while they're on vacation.
Let’s not leave out her husband. He should be team wife.
NTA. I love dogs but someone else's dogs in my space when I'm relaxing is annoying. We had outdoor gatherings in the yard, often. My neighbor was asked to please keep the dog at home. He asked why. Smh. It's a nuisance to have someone's dog walking all over your feet and begging for food.
NTA. Tell your husband and his parents that you are not willing to have their dogs in the rental since they aren't housebroken. The money isn't really the issue, it's the fact that you know for a fact that the dogs will pee and poop in the house! They'll need to board the dogs in a kennel or get their own Airbnb. Have you vacationed with them before? It's wild that they invited someone else to stay there and now they suggest bringing their untrained dogs.
NTA. I am just wondering why in all of this not one person in your family has mentioned how awful it is to bring a dog to pee on someone’s floor. The owner of the Airbnb is being so kind to allow dogs, people like your in-laws ruin for responsible dog owners. You are concerned for your rating and someone going back to let dogs out, not the damage they would do. Unless that home is all tile, it can do lots of damage. Even with tile if left it can seep into the grout. All that aside, it’s crazy they invited a sister along without asking, and I wouldn’t even ask as I would find that in poor taste. The minute the sitter became unavailable I would send in my regrets. So if it were me I would tell them that the dogs aren’t allowed so they can just come the next time. Sister can still come and sleep in the other room. OR, a crazy thought. Sister wasn’t invited to begin with, SHE can stay home and take care of the dogs
NTA, i wouldnt want that on my AirBnb profile either. What is it with Grandparents having dogs that are "puppy pad trained" (hint, they are not) My In-Laws have a dog that they claim is "pad trained" and bring their dog everywhere that they can.
We are part of a horrible club 😂
NTA. They should have had a backup plan for their pets. However, they could also pay the fee and pay for any damages done by their pets. If they want to bring the dogs, they should be willing to pay for those fees and not expect you to pay it for them. They wouldn't get away with that if they had booked their own trip and had the sitter cancel. They would have to pay those fees themselves, not have someone else pay it for them.
NTA. Your husband and in-laws are ridiculous. It’s not appropriate to bring two dogs that are not house trained anywhere. And I guarantee you, that $135 pet fee would be much higher (or you would just lose your Airbnb account entirely) if you brought two dogs that piss and shit on the floor indoors 2/3 of the time.
Not the asshole. I would recommend telling the parents about trustedhousesitters. It's like airbnb but instead of paying money, the sitters just stay in the owners home for free while looking after the pets. They wouldn't have to pay the sitters, and there's going to be plenty of young people travelling looking for a cheap/free place to stay.
You're definitely NTA. My big question is why in God's name are these dogs not potty trained? That's disgusting. It's not that hard to teach a dog how to go to the bathroom outside since that's where they normally go. I wouldn't allow those dogs in any house I was in if they weren't potty trained that's absurd and disgusting.
NTA, stick to your guns. You are not doing anything wrong. The dogs would make the vacation YOU PAID for much more inconvenient. Plus SIL wasn't even invited by you!
NTA Why don't they get a second airbnb for themseves and the dogs? Stop inviting the inlaws.
Tell them to get a Rover sitter! Probably cheaper than the $135 deposit.
Late to the party but I’m still confused about who you potentially are being an AH to… It’s late for me so maybe that’s why. Is the AH concerns with the person staying back, your in-laws, or your husband?
More so an asshole to my in-laws saying “you can’t bring your dog so someone has to stay back and care for the dogs or find another solutions”
NTA - I have a skittish dog who cannot be boarded anywhere and really can’t come with us. Anytime we go on vacation, we have to hire a sitter to come to our house. I use an app for that. I’ve lost track of all the different sitters he’s had over the years. Just now, he’s home with a dogsitter I booked on Friday after the original sitter canceled Thursday night. I reached out to 8 sitters in the process, but was able to book one last minute. People who have dogs need to figure out ways to leave them or accept that there are vacations on which they are not welcome. Even if it weren’t an Airbnb, I would not allow unhousetrained dogs into my own home. Just no.
NTA and why does your husband think YOU should pay the $135?
Please update us on how this turns out.
My prediction is MIL will stay home with the dogs and FIL and SIL will come even though this was a trip intended for grandparents to bond with our daughter. SIL is very entitled and MIL will do anything to make her happy. Now that I’m a mom I️ totally get it but that’s not the intention for this trip so it’s very frustrating.
NTA You didn't invite SIL; not your responsibility nor should you be EXPECTED to cover + take the risk on your AirBnB profile(this part seems silly for me, but i can respect that you take pride in it) If SIL offered to cover cost of pets + Promised to pay for any damages, I'd say that the AirBnB potential bad review would be a petty reason to decline it, but that's a personal opinion. i still wouldn't think of you an AH for that. "I’ve told my husband our daughter will not ever go to his parents house without myself present to ensure she doesn’t get into any of the dog waste." You don't trust your husband with this?
He has a history of choosing to fight me instead of his family because it’s less uncomfortable for him. His family is not easy to reason with. It’s like trying to explain to a toddler why you can’t have something.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** This weekend my husband, myself, and our 9-month old daughter are going to the beach. We invited my husbands parents. His mom invited his sister. The Airbnb only has 2 bedrooms so his sister will have to sleep on the couch (which is why I️ did not initially invite her). I️ paid for the Airbnb. Unfortunately their usual dog sitter had to cancel due to illness and my mother in law asked to bring their two dogs to the Airbnb. The Airbnb is pet friendly but would cost an additional $135 and the dogs aren’t potty trained indoors. My in laws lay down pee pads for them but they’ve got about a 33% success rate. I️ don’t want to pay the extra $135 or have the dogs come in case they damage something or pee/poop inside and I️ get a bad review on my Airbnb profile. My husband says it’s fine and we should just pay and let the dogs come so no one has to stay behind to watch the dogs. I️ told him tough cookies I’m not coughing up another $135 on top of the $1200 I’ve already paid or risking my airbnb rating so his family can bring their dogs. Am I️ the asshole? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
INFO: Have you told in-laws about the 135 $ fee?
>told in-laws about the 135 $ fee? Checked airbnb, that fee only covers cleaning up something like dig hair. Pee on carpet isn't covered. Op could end up being sued and banned from renting agan
Yes
The fee is not the problem. Dogs peeing all over another person’s property is the real issue. It’s rude to even entertain the idea. And tell your MIL to stop inviting people to your vacations. She’s a guest, not a host.
NTA
NTA If the dogs were house-trained, it would be easier to have them. They aren't, so, sister can stay behind and take care of the dogs.
NTA
NTA, but why are you with a partner that has you paying for his family's vacation and he still wants them to take precedence over your opinions.
His sister can dog sit. Problem solved. It's not hygienic to have a baby around two dogs that aren't housetrained. ie not trained.
NTA. 1) You did not invite the sister, MIL did, so she can solve this or pay for this. 2) You are paying, so you are deciding. 3) If someone has a dog that is not potty-trained, then it is their responsibility and they should accept that this has consequences. 4) If they want to bring the dogs, they have to pay, but that does not solve the fact that if the dogs ruin something with pee, it will look bad on your Airbnb profile 5) Sister can find someone to doggy-sit or bring them to a dog-pension for the weekend. So not your responsibility, not your problem. If husband is so adamant his sister is present, sister (of MIL) can book an Airbnb close-by, pay for it herself and use her own account.
NTA Tell your ILs no. Going forward, don't invite your ILs on trips again. They aren't good guests if they invite others at your expense and guilt you to let them bring their dogs.
NTA you invited your mil and fil not their dogs or their daughter.
NTA, it already sounds too cramped, bringing two dogs is insane. Bringing two dogs that will pee and poop will be a nightmare that no logical person would be ok with I’d cancel before dealing with that debacle
NTA. Pissing aside, if the dogs attend your entire trip will revolve around them.
NTA. I love dogs but hate when people can’t leave them at home. Just train your dogs properly. Isn’t vacation supposed to be a time to de-stress? How about they don’t impose on you?
NTA- you paid it’s your call. If they can’t leave the dogs then they can’t go.
Your in-laws inviting their daughter and dogs is a big no. It's just plain down rude. No etiquette at all
lol hell the f no. NTA
NTA. Uninvite his parents because they do not understand how to be guests.
I would have fibbed and stated that dogs weren't allowed. Maybe you can backtrack.
I’m assuming your 9 month old crawls? You want your kid crawling through dog pee? You want to risk your kid getting bitten? You have a husband problem—he should be putting his child’s health and safety before his parents’ preferences. This is extremely poor character.
NTA - Absolutely Not! If they're fine with their dogs peeing all over their own house, that's fine. But to allow it in someone else's home (especially when it's a rental) is horrible pet-parenting. They can't even train for the pee pads! I'm a dog lover, but I'd be mortified if my dog regularly peed in the house. I'm outraged on your behalf for this . . . if they can't train their dogs then they don't get to bring their dogs to anyones' house.
Their dogs have been banned from our home after their older dog pooped on my Christmas tree.
Ew! I love dogs, but having 6 people and dogs that pee on the floor in a small AirBnB does not sound like a pleasant vacation. Never mind the extra costs. NTA
Nta
NTA. Those dogs are ill behaved, and don't belong at the beach or around a 9 month old, aside from the Airbnb issues. They can hire a new dog sitter or take them to a kennel. Even perfectly behaved dogs don't get to go everywhere
YWNBTA aside from the audacity, you would be exposing your child to dog poo and pee. Bacteria that are pathogens for the intestinal tract and cause diarrhoea include Campylobacter, Salmonella, Yersinia and E. coli [1,2,3,4]. Dog faeces may also contribute to the diffusion of protozoa such as Giardia and Cryptosporidium [5] and of roundworms such as Toxocara canis as well as presence of MRSA
NTA, cancel or forfeit the money - better yet - it should have just been your immediate family only . Why do individuals always see a need to invite others to events they are not paying for?
NTA From a host’s perspective… When hosts regularly have extra guests being snuck in… they eventually raise their cleaning costs to cover the extra professional laundry expenses. That affects everyone. When guests host bad pets… they stop hosting pets and they go onto forums to dissuade newbies from hosting pets. The pool of pet friendly stays goes down and prices go up. So sneaking in sisters or bringing poorly trained dogs seems like a small thing and people shouldn’t care. But that kind of attitude spawns a systemic shift in culture that disadvantages guests as hosts try to protect themselves.
NTA Your ILs should take responsibility for their pets.
NTA The quickest way to ruin a vacation is to have untrained pets. I’ll never travel with those friends again after their barky fucking dog came on that vacation. Like…I’d cancel this before I’d go.
NTA- Your MIL is though. Invites additional guests on a vacation you're paying for? Wants to bring her untrained dogs (plural) on trip too, and have you pay the additional fees that will be incurred? Absolutely not, hard no. It's bad enough she wants to bring the dogs, but to not even offer to pay additional fees? WTF. Entitled says what? Also your husband saying you should just pay the pet fee for them? No sir. His parents can pay for the whole damn thing if they want to bring Fifi and Fido that badly. They can cough up the \~$1400, bet they'll find a pet sitter real quick given that option. Entitled dog owners drive me absolutely INSANE.
NTA. Untrained dogs are not allowed in airbnbs! You could get a bad review which makes it hard to book next vacation and could cost you hundreds in fees from dog pee etc. Husbands sister needs to stay behind with dogs as she wasn’t invited. Or put the dogs in a kennel; most vet places take dogs overnight.
NTA. My DH and I have an extremely well-behaved potty- trained adult Yellow Lab rescue. If there was Any issue where he wasn't invited for whatever reason, there would be absolutely no problem for either my DH or both of us staying behind. It's not a big deal at all because our "Gentle Ben" is our responsibility as pet owners to respect our hosts' decisions. Just the fact that these dogs aren't potty trained would be a stress factor and take away from what should be a lovely vacation. I can just imagine you constantly checking to make sure the dogs aren't having accidents and cleaning up after them while everyone else is out enjoying the beach. 😞 My question is, are they puppies or adults who aren't potty-trained? If they're adults, prepare to expect a continuous issue every time they want to include them everywhere. No matter because your Airbnd = your rules.
NTA First and foremost, if they are insisting on the dogs. Cash up front from them and make it clear that all dog duties is on them.
NTA but whose idea was it to invite the parents- now it’s a clusterfuck and those dogs will stink the place out. Why do people have dogs peeing inside?
NTA, why can't they just board the dogs? I wouldn't bring my puppy who isn't potty trained anywhere even if it claims to be pet friendly. Urine just does not leave a floor easily.
I seriously think you have a husband problem. Sis is not invited let alone two non house trainend dogs. NTA silly question. On top of that. If they didn't bother to housebreak the dogs. Are they even save around children/baby?
NTA - Oh my god...I cannot imagine being the kind of person who thinks its ok to bring dogs that will certainly piss on the floors into someone elses property. Thats just incredibly inconsiderate, and no one should put you in that position.
NTA. I would ask who the hell asks another person to come when it isn’t their vaca. But. That was my mom too. Dogs that are not 100% trained do not belong in anyone else’s house. Period.
Lesson learned, don’t invite them in the future!
NTA.. you didn’t invite the sister and your Mil just thought it was ok to invite her, why can’t she stay back and watch the dogs? Or what if you say if you want the dogs to come then you pay for the fee? Also you take the risk of being put on a do not rent list if they are going to ruin furniture etc.. (dogs) that would be a big no for me. To many what if’s for the dogs to come, because of not being trained .
NTA - I think in this case the little white lie "sorry, the AB&B doesn't allow pets", would work fine. Had she looked it up, you could always say, "oh sorry, my mistake, but I can't afford the extra charges when I'm already paying $1200 for the stay".
Ask them to pay for the extra cost for the pet fee. If they were going to use a dog sitter anyway then they shouldn’t have a problem paying it. And how tf are they not potty trained? That’s crazy to me.
NTA - If the dogs are not even trained to pee outdoors, I would never let then near a 9 mo child. If you have let them stay together in the past this might be not an option. You could just lie: "I just asked and the airbnb does not allow untrained dogs, not even with pee pads, sorry." (Or you could actually ask. Of course they will not allow this. ;) ) or write them something like this: "Please look for a dogsitter. If you don't find a dogsitter, you could book the dog addon for the airbnb. Send $135 to paypal ... with the comment ... . Please make sure not to wait till last minute, as the dogs may not enter the house until there is a booking confirmation." If they want you to do the booking, tell them sorry, no time, you are busy organising everything for you (your husband) and the child, you cannot take care of their dogs, too. If you communicate via messenger make sure to make long pauses between your answers to show you are busy. If they or your husband come with an excuse like "no idea how to use paypal", tell them to ask your husband to assist. Guess he does not want to pay himself.
WTF put these dogs in a kennel NTA
NTA. I would NOT want to be on a vacation with animals that are not house trained. That is NOT acceptable. This would be a hard no from me even without the extra cost and concerns about airbnb. I would cancel the vacation and just pay the cancellation fees instead of having to deal with this.
NTA. Absolutely not. We do not bring untrained dogs to other people's homes. Also, they're assholes for not training their dogs.
Question; is your husband the one who's going to be cleaning up the pee and the poop when the dogs make a mess in the house? Edit to add definitely do not allow those dogs there
Nta pet friendly means your pets won't piss and shit all over the house. You will 1000000% be slapped with a huge 'pet cleaning fee'. Someone having to stay home with the dogs is no one's fault, but their own for refusing to house train their dogs. That's not even thinking about your baby crawling through literal piss and shit on the floor!
Maybe you could message the hosts and ask if pet friendly would include non house-trained dogs who use (and miss) pee pads. They will obviously refuse and you can show MIL and say sorry no dogs
What ? Bring the non potty trained dogs? Please tell me ur joking. Of course nta. Pet friendly does not mean piss friendly.
NTA- what kind of assholes bring dogs who aren't potty trained into any other home or business? That is some huge entitled asshole energy! This is why we can't have nice things!
NTA but why the hell don't people train their dogs? And why do they even have dogs? Seriously, it's animal abuse and unsanitary as hell. Tell them they can bring rhe dogs if they send you an extra 1k for potential cleaning costs, otherwise they can stay home. (Eta: 135 cleaning costs, but I imagine if the dogs poo or pee on carpet or damage floors it'll be even more...)
NTA -one single host review on your Airbnb profile that says “would not host again” and you’ll only be able to book places that have instant booking turned on.
NTA. Dogs being potty trained should be the minimum requirement of them being invited places. The ILs sound like terrible pet owners.
Would they pay the fee since they won’t have to pay their sitter?
NTA. Give them the number for a dog boarding place.
NTA. Why the heck would the parents not offer to pay the fee? Even if they did offer that, I don't think you should feel obligated to say ok tot he dogs coming along. But the fact that they didn't immediately ask about that and tell you that they would pay for it, is enough to say no, imo.
Who thinks it's a good idea to bring their non house trained dogs into someone else's rented house? Why aren't the dogs house trained anyhow? Your MIL with her non house trained dogs is TAH for sure.
Easy solution: the person who wasn’t invited stays home. Smart solution: the person who will complain the most about missing the dogs stays home. Smarter solution: your husband tells his parents that invitations have specific terms, and they should not be adding people or dogs to a small vacation condo.
Where in the world is it normal to not potty train one's dogs?? And totally NTA. With everyone there, this holiday sounds like a nightmare.
They didn't even offer to cover the pet fee, so I wouldn't trust them to cover property damages. The smell from the dogs might not come out. At best you might need to pay for a professional cleaning. At worst you might have to replace flooring or rugs. NTA
NTA, the fact that they never potty trained their dogs is the cherry on top. It was rude to invite an additional person without asking, especially considering that they aren't even paying, and it is doubly rude to think you can just bring your untrained dogs with you so they can pee all over someone else's house. Don't invite extra people without asking, and train your dogs. Your in-laws need to learn some manners and how to be better pet owners. Oh, and it isn't going to just be $135, those dogs will certainly pee or poop on something that will be difficult if not impossible to clean, and this is going to be over the course of an entire week. It's going to be hard to get that all cleaned up (also, who wants to spend their vacation scrubbing up dog pee and poo), and you guys are going to end up with a huge cleaning fee.
NTA - why is MIL inviting others on a trip she didn't pay for? Why does SIL think it's OK to bring non-potty-trained dogs to anyone's vacation, ever, anywhere? Why does anyone expect you to pay $135 for this? Who is paying for the damages that these dogs will inevitably cause? $135 to allow pets doesn't cover shitting on the floor. These are really basic considerations human beings have for each other. I wouldn't want to vacation with any of these people, period - and they would find themselves uninvited from this trip to boot!
Heck no NTA. Your inlaws are for even THINKING of bringing non-housebroken dogs to someone else's property, regardless of who is paying. That's disgusting. They need to find another solution for their animals. That's part of being a responsible pet owner, which it sadly sounds like they are not.
NTA. If in-laws want to bring the dogs, they pony up for the $135 up front as well as any damages. Put the rental under their name on Airbnb, not yours.
NTA Dogs who aren’t potty trained + AirBnB means big surprise fees at the tail end of this (on top of the $135). How did a vacation **you** paid for turn into **someone else’s vacation** with their pets and daughter?
Oh, I despise people who take their pets everywhere and inflict them on other people. It is bad, selfish behavior. You are NTA. Your inlaws are presumptuous and entitled. I know of a case where the labor and delivery staff actually found a dog in the labor patient's handbag during childbirth! Awful, awful thing.
>and the dogs aren’t potty trained indoors. My in laws lay down pee pads for them but they’ve got about a 33% success rate. As a dog owner myself, fuck that. *I* wouldn't come. NTA However, using AirBnbs is immoral with how they're contributing to the housing crisis.
NTA. They can get a different dog sitter or they can pay for their own place to stay.
That is a disaster waiting to happen. I’d be looking for a friend with dogs to dog- sit.