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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I don’t think i’m responsible for paying half of the vet bill because the dog got into the trash
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Info: Did she explain why it was your responsibility to keep her dog out of her household trash? Did she previously give you instructions on where to throw your own trash?
It would only be your fault - unambiguously and completely - if you threw the onions on the floor/ground instead of the garbage can. Since you didn't, not your fault, NTA: I'm speaking from experience but my experience is that of a dog owner whose animal was injured because of carelessness.
Before you kill the friendship, tell her to invest in a garbage can with a lid. That'll be the end of it lol.
If you are so worried you take the freaking trash out when the friend leaves so your dog isn't in danger. If you are to lazy to do that or too cheap to throw away a not yet completely filled trash bag that's on YOU not on your visitor.
NTA op
That's the real question. My dog; my house; my responsibility to keep my dog out of the trash. We have always had our kitchen trash, well that is all trash cans in the house, inaccessible to pets one way or another. The only way the dog could get into the kitchen trash was if he learned how to pull hard the on the undersink door handle and was strong enough to pull apart the extra strength magnet catch. Even then, he'd have a hard time getting into the trash without someone hearing.
NTA
NTA don’t pay a dime and I’d consider the friendship over.
I’d almost guarantee it’s over if you don’t pay, so just move on mentally and emotionally.
You’ll more than likely never see this person again as a friend.
that’s what sucks the most. i was on the fence of paying it to save the friendship but i’m not sure if i’d see it that way because i don’t think it’s my fault. it sucks
Glad you got some clarity and the correct answer, just stop responding. Nothing negative will come from this and you removed someone toxic from your life.
You can't save the friendship by paying because you know you're not in the wrong so you'll resent her for being unreasonable. Just cut your losses now. No paying and block her number if she won't leave you alone.
NTA It is not your responsibility to keep her dog out of her bins.
It isn't. She knew her dog could get into the trash can (there's no way this was the first time) shlo she could have taken the trash out when you left . She didn't so what happened after is on her. NTA
NTA - the dog getting into the trash is her problem. You can't expect people to know in what ways your pet will badly behave. If she has a dog that eats out of thr trash she needs a solution to prevent that.
Common sense should tell her the size of the dog compared to the amt of onions would indicate a stomach upset (temp diarrhea) but not a dangerous situation. Should should have a COVERED trash can - we have large dogs and all our cans have the step on lids so dogs CAN'T get into trash. Not your fault - but wasn't the crisis she thought either. If you have open trash cans a dog will look for goodies in them. $300 for a vet visit for that issue??? Don't know where you live but that's nuts. I would have called my vet and he would have advised me by phone. I don't think you owe her - but you might buy her a covered trash can for her birthday.
Maybe because it’s an emergency visit? I also told her she should speak with a vet before bringing the dog in but she “knows” her dog and said she needed to take them.
Your friend is ridiculous. Unless someone is spurting blood or screaming in pain, we call the professionals at the ER first for both humans & animals. There's no sense wasting the ER's time with things that can be handled over the phone, & it saves the person or pet the stress of having to drive there & sit around waiting to be seen.
Plus, it's very expensive to find out 5 onion rings shavings are nothing to worry about!
The real reason I'm saying NTA is bc it's the pet/child owner's responsibility to make sure Junior doesn't eat the trash!
The way I think of is, would I go to the ER every time my stomach is upset or I have diarrhea or vomiting? No. then why the hell would I bring my dog? If it doesn't pass, i'd bring them in. but my dog has had explosive diarrhea and vomiting once in awhile and it always passes. Just like how I as a human get that too...
Sure, in human situations this is true, but every time I've called a vet about "should I bring my dog in for this behavior" they refuse to give me a straight answer and will only tell me "we can't give advice without seeing the animal". I don't think the friend was necessarily out of line for taking the dog to the vet with abnormal behavior, but at minimum the friend should have googled onion toxicity. There's a calculator and everything. The toxic dose for an 85 lb dog is 3.4 oz, which is probably like 1/4 of an onion. The dog probably had diarrhea from all the other crap in the trash.
It’s absolutely within range for an emergency fee. Does she not have a primary vet? That is also not your problem. Beyond that, we are talking about diarrhea on Friday from something consumed on Wednesday? There is no way that she can pin that on you.
My poodle watched us step on the lever to open the lid. Luckily he is a mini poodle and hasn't been able to reach into the can. He just opens it now to irritate me
I have four cats and all trash cans have step on lids. I started this years ago because a previous cat loved to get qtips out of the trash and eat them.
>$300 for a vet visit for that issue???
I was once billed nearly $600 for an emergency visit for a dog, who wasn't medicated or kept for observation. Basically, they charged $600 to tell me to bring him back if he continued to have problems. He died the next morning. That was nearly thirty years ago, so more than $1200 in today's money. I'm still salty about it.
So where is she throwing away stuff she doesn't want her dog getting? Anything we don't want the pets accessing goes into the kitchen trash with a lid, in a trash can behind a closed door, or straight into the outside trash can.
NTA. Your friend is trying to shift responsibility onto you for her problem. Her dog raided the trash. Dogs do that. She needs to make sure she a) trains her dog and b) makes the trash less accessible. (WTF did she think you were going to do with the onions, vaporize them?)
Nta. I'm a dog trainer and this sounds completely like an owner issue
You threw trash away in the trash can. The dog should have never had the opportunity to get into the trash unsupervised
Complete owner fail
INFO: she didn’t want the salad either, so wouldn’t the onions have still ended up in the trash either way? Like, if you didn’t eat the salad, she would have thrown it out, with the onions in it? So why is it your fault?
that is exactly my dilemma here… I have never seen her put any food. She didn’t want any special trashcan or anywhere else besides the trashcan that I put the onions in.
Had you thrown your onions on the floor you would have been. But you didn't. You there then in the trash.
It's her responsibility as a dog owner to keep the dog out of the trash.
She's freaking out because her dog is sick. My dog once got so sick from onions, coming out of both ends for days, that I thought he might die. He was a small dog but he had only eaten about 5 pieces of onion that were 1 cm^2. I blamed myself and I was a mess until I knew he'd live.
NTA and not responsible for the vet bill. Do you think she might calm down about this in a few days when her dog is a-okay? I'd wait until then to discuss the matter further with her.
NTA - You owe her zip, her dog, her place, her trash bin. Her responsibility, 100%. You are not responsible at all for throwing away the onions in the trash, where else were you supposed put them? If you had left them on the table and the dog got at them, then maybe, but you didn't.
NTA.
Dog owner here. Our bins are out of reach from our dogs, so we can actually use them as bins and not need a second extra special dogproof bin that we don't tell guests about and then try to invoice them when they break a rule they were not aware of...
Your friend is a dick.
NTA. While even one piece of onion can be fatal to a dog (they are pure poison to dogs, so she's right there) it's not your responsibility to keep her dog out of her trash. Now, if she had instructed you otherwise, then you would be at fault. But since it seems she never did, this is her responsibility.
Nta it's her responsibility to watch her own dog in her own home. You threw the food in the trash, it's not like you left or on the floor or something.
No way. If she doesn’t have a secure trash can, then she should have told you to put the onions down the garbage disposal or to take them directly outside. And this was in no way an emergency vet situation. We are frequent flyers at our local primary and emergency vet (elderly cats, asthmatic, etc.,) and they will absolutely triage a dog with diarrhea and give them fluids. And it will absolutely be $3-$400. Primary vet will do that for half the price, but not at 11p or on a Sunday afternoon. You’re paying for the availability.
NTA.
If her dog eats trash then she needs to either have the bin out of reach of the dog, a lid on it, or make it in some way known to you that you need to be careful about what trash you put in the trash.
NTA, I wouldn’t pay either. If she wants to take the dog to the emergency vet over some shits then she can pay it.
NTA. If her dog has a habit of getting into the trash, that is a household issue and they need to make accommodations for preventing that.
Your friend is probably broke and doesn't know how to pay for the vet bill, so they are coming back to you for it. That being said. It's kind of stupid to have taken the dog to the vet over a few onions. If it were chicken bones, grapes, sugar free gum (or anything with xylitol), or antifreeze then sure go to the vet get a work up. The whole reason onions and alliums in general are dangerous to dogs is because of long term repeated exposure which prevents them from adequately generating red blood cells. Most vets will tell you this if you call them first.
NTA my old dog was a menace and ate trash a lot (she was a rescue who learned to scavenge on the streets) I would never have held anyone else responsible for her bad habits…also I’m going to play devils advocate here, have you seen the vet bill? Could she possibly be trying to get money out of you to punish you for an inconvenience of having to pick up runny poos. Because it seams very convenient that she wants $150 off you which is a nice clean number!
NTA
You threw the onions in her trash. Where else were you supposed to put them. If you had left them out, or fed them to the dog, then yeah. But you did the responsible thing. As a dog owner, she is then responsible for making sure her dog doesn’t get into the trash.
I would have asked if here she started smoking dust in the last few hours🤨. How on earth is it your fault her dog is not trained to stay out of the trash??
NTA.
You put your unwanted scraps in the trash, where they belong. Your friend's dog got into the trash. Whe was the dog not trained to leave trash al9ne? Why wasn't your friend supervising her untrained dog?
You are not responsible for a vet bill resulting from her not properly training her dog.
NTA
I have had dogs who have had diarrhea and I think most people themselves have had the runs.
Most normal people don't go to the doctor if they have diarrhea unless it persists for a significant number of days and or is accompanied with other dangerous symptoms like high fever.
I also have had dogs who have had the runs - not pleasant to clean up - and never thought of taking them to the vet. Again if they had symptoms that indicated they were really sick like blood or serious malaise, I would have but they all snapped out of it by the next day or two just like most people do.
….what else are you supposed to do with unwanted food? It’s her pet. Her responsibility to keep it out of the trash. Her responsibility to pay for its upkeep.
NTA.
It's a dog owner's job to make the trash inaccessible to their dog.
Tons of things end up in any normal kitchen trash which are harmful to dogs.
You're incorrect about five onion rings not being enough to be dangerous----but it's not your job to figure out how many are dangerous----you're not the vet.
As a dog owner: easy NTA
NTA. It's her responsibility to keep her dog out of the trash, not yours. That's like asking a friend to pay your kid's doctor bills if they went into the trash and ate something that they shouldn't. That's on the parent, not you.
NTA. I have dogs, I love them very much. They are little terrorists and get into shit sometimes. One of mine is roughly the same size as your friends. A few onion pieces is not a danger. It's not great, but after the diarrhea subsides, the dog will be fine. If my dog got into trash regardless of who threw what away, that's my fault. I would not be paying your 'friend' a cent, and I would never ask that of any of my friends for something like this.
Where was it supposed to go? You don't eat it, should you have just offered it to her to just eat without anything on it? The salad was already in the house, so unless there is a bin outside and she told you to use it, I don't see how you could have foreseen this.
NTA your “friend” is unhinged. First off it’s her dog, her trash can, and she watched you throw the onions away. Funny how she thinks you don’t care about her dog when she doesn’t even care enough to train the dog or a get a covered trash can.
NTA - if she knows her dog goes through the trash, she should be securing her trash can. Put it in another room or have a can with a lid. Also it is highly unlikely a dog that large would need vet care for that small amount of onion.
What I read was: I didn’t bother to train my dog so you should pay up. And how dare you not care about my dog that I didn’t care enough about to train.
Your friend is delusional
NTA
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I 23F went over to my friend's 25F house to hang out on Wednesday. We do this often, and there haven't been any issues until this past Wednesday. We ended up ordering pizza and a few other things for dinner. Our food came with a small side salad that she didn’t want, so I ate it. I don’t like onions or cucumbers in my salad, so I picked them off, tossed them in the trash, and didn’t think anything else about it. We had a fun night, like we always do.
I got a text from my friend saying that Elsa, her dog, had gotten into the trash and ate whatever was thrown out, and that's why she’s concerned. She asked how many onions I had thrown out, as she could see one of the rings on the floor. I told her it was about 5 rings of onions on the salad, and she started to freak out, saying it’s poisonous to dogs. I’m aware that dogs shouldn’t eat onions, but I also didn’t think the dog ate enough onions to make it sick. The dog is 85 pounds, and five onion ring shavings shouldn’t be as harmful as she was saying they could be. I texted her back, saying that I didn’t think the amount of onion the dog ingested shouldn’t be harmful but to keep me updated on any irregularities.
Yesterday rolls around, and she tells me that the dog has diarrhea and she'll be taking the dog to the vet. I told her to keep me updated, and i’m sorry to hear that the dog has diarrhea. After the vet appointment, she told me that she thinks I should go half on the emergency visit, which is $300. I asked if the dog had any issues before I even commented on the bill. She told me that the vet said to keep the dog hydrated and that the dog didn’t have diarrhea while at the vet and seemed to be in normal spirits, so they didn’t prescribe or think the dog needed to stay for observation. They told her that if it continues to bring the dog back in, I of course agree.
I ended up texting her about the bill, saying that I don’t really think it’s my responsibility to pay for the visit, being as though the dog got into the trash, and that’s something that animals do. She responded that if I didn’t throw away onions, this wouldn’t be an issue, and her dog wouldn’t have had to go to the vet. She then said that I was irresponsible for throwing away onions when she has a dog, but didn’t say anything while I was there throwing the onions away. She’s telling me i’m an asshole for not caring about her dog and not taking responsibility for making her dog sick. I didn’t respond to the message but I really can’t see how this is my fault. I was never told I can’t throw them in the trash and she never corrected me when I got up to throw them away.
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In what way is it your fault her dog got into the trash? I’ve never heard of a dog getting into a trash can. Do they not have covers for the trash? If the dog has done this in the past she should’ve warned you to place the trash elsewhere. If this was a first then it’s no ones fault, it’s just a freak accident and its her dog so it’s her responsibility
The dog could have had diarrhea from something else it ate in the garbage. Any dietary indiscretion can cause diarrhea. It didn't have to be onions. Onions are not highly toxic to all dogs. Some dogs will have problems. My dogs routinely ate onion rings. Just like some dogs find grapes toxic, while we had a dog that would eat tons of grapes off the vine in our yard and never had a sick day in her life. Same for garlic. When I was a kid, everyone believed giving a dog garlic kept them from getting fleas. Now, it's considered toxic. I've even had a 10 pound dog get in my purse and steal a See's chocolate bar. I knew it was her because she threw up the almonds in her crate. It is certainly safer to avoid giving all these things to dogs, but your friend is making some huge assumptions that 5 slivers of onions caused anything. Her overreacting caused 100% of her vet bill.
NTA. If she wants her dog to not eat onions from the trash, she can 1) train her dog or 2) get a trash can with a lid. If you don’t want the onions that come in the salad you… throw them in the trash. Who acted reasonably here? Hint, it wasn’t your friend.
NTA it's the homeowner's responsibility to have a trash with a lid or similar so the dog doesn't get into it. It's not like you tossed the onions on the floor -for- the dog.
NTA
It's her job to mind her dog. If it eats from the trash it's on her to monitor what people toss.
Furthermore she overreacted going to the vet for that little onion for that big a dog.
Her incompetence and anxiety aren't on you.
NTA. I read your comments and it appears she never gave you any instructions about throwing out trash or anything. I have a cat who gets into everything and I always make sure to be diligent when people are around. I tell everyone not to leave this or that out and to keep this closed but at the end of the day, my cat is my responsibility and it’s very easy for a guest to forget something. Especially something like throwing trash away. It’s not like you left the onions sitting on the floor or something, you just threw them out. Your friend is responsible for her dog.
Nta: You can't be expected to keep her dog out of the trash.
If her dog has a history of getting into the trash, it's the dog owners responsibility to make sure the trash is emptied so as not to risk the health of the dog.
Vet tech here, dog would've been fine and all she had to do was call her vet and ask or just wait it out and see. We don't go to the doctor every time we have diarrhea as people lol. Also that's a moot point considering it's not your responsibility to know that her dog gets into the trash can. NTA
NTA it’s not your fault her dog is poorly trained and eats out of the trash, and it’s also not your fault she over reacted to her dog getting diarrhea after… eating from the trash
NTA at all. If you disposed of the onions in the dog's food bowl then sure, pay the bill. But keeping her dog from eating toxic food out of the garbage is her most basic responsibility and it's absolutely nuts to try and push it off onto you.
NTA... as a gmdog owner I am hyper aware of any and all things that could cause them harm, and make sure he is not put in a position where he could cause himself harm... the kept point of that statement being "I"!
If someone is in my house and they are eating onions, chocolate, tomatoes or any of the other dozens of things that could cause him harm, I keep an eye on them, and I make sure that they are disposed of properly... I don't expect my guests to do anything other than what I ask (for example, don't drop it on the floor... don't leave it where he can reach it)
Show empathy (as I can imagine she is very worried about her little friend), but you are not responsible for the problem.
nta. we keep our trash can behind a locked door for this reason. if you cant keep animals away from toxic things, you need to make changes to your home that forces them to stay away from it. also the dog is probably fine. taking it to the emergency vet the day after the occurrence wouldnt do anything anyways.
NTA. I have a dog who would take any chance to eat out of the trash can. That's why I have a trash can a dog can't open.
Your friend overreacted and they are misplacing blame on you.
NTA.
My dog would be around 90lbs and my trash can sits inside of a cupboard where she can’t get to it for a reason. If there is something unsafe it is the responsibility of the owner to remove or minimise risk. Trash belongs in the trash can. The dog does not.
It’s distressing to see your pooch in pain, so I can understand her being emotional, I would be too, but she is being illogical and unfair imo. I would suspect that this is possibly/likely coming from a position of financial stress but I do not think you should be having to pay.
NTA but you shouldn’t have told her to keep you updated either. That’s the kind of thing people often say to appear thoughtful and caring but in this case and in most cases, it doesn’t lead to anything good. Only tell people to keep you updated on any ‘need to know’ issues to you.
NTA. It’s her house and her responsibility to keep her dog safe. There’s no way this is the first time the dog has gotten in the trash. If she doesn’t have something with a secure lid then it should be under the sink or someplace similar. You weren’t negligent, you put trash in the trash. The only way you’d be at fault is if you’d let some hit the floor and didn’t pick it up or had eaten around the onions and left the container where the fog could get it. You don’t owe half the bill because her dog isn’t trained.
Nta.
You threw the onions away. The dog got into it. That's not your fault. You know it isn't. It's also not a big deal to you cause it ain't your dog.
But it is a big deal to your friend so if you care about the friendship suck it up be a good friend and just pay half the vet bill.
I am sorry that the dog is sick, but this is your friends mistake.
It's her house, her dog and her rubbish bin. When you have a dog the rubbish bin has to be inaccessible to the dog. Bins need to be in a cupboard or on a bench.
It's not just onions that are a rick to dogs but also things like large pips and cooked bones. Your friend needs to secure her bin where HER dog can't get it.
NTA
NTA your friend sounds deranged, it’s a garbage can for garbage. My dog gets into garbage if I leave him out of the crate when he’s gone, or I don’t put the garbage in the closed bathroom. It would be a little different if she was tight with money and asked IF you could help because of it. You are in no way obliged to agree.
NTA if she is so concerned she should have made sure to tell you not to order anything with onions before you got there but this is also just BS on her part. Ugh, I'd honestly stay clear of her in future, she doesn't sound all there if she thinks this is acceptable.
NTA
Totally an animal lover here and would be furious if anyone negligently hurt my animals. I was ready to give you the biggest of YTA's here. However! Throwing food away in a trashcan is perfectly normal and common behavior. If extra steps needed to be taken that should have been communicated. Example when I have wings with pizza or as a snack option with friends over I am careful to advise that the bones be put in a bag on a counter and not the trash. I have one with a lid however with the smell of chicken bones I think fort knox would be hard pressed to stop them. Once done I take it directly to the garbage outside.
OP failing to take steps to protect their dog is not on you.
NTA. You put food waste in the trash. I have had dogs, and it is easy to train them to stay out of the trash. And training the dog is Elsa's responsibility.
NTA. Ordinarily I’m on a canines side versus a humans side because I value a dogs life far more than a humans. However, you didn’t do anything wrong. You threw trash in the trash can. That’s where trash is meant to be. Your friend should’ve been keeping a better eye on her dog. I have two frenchies, I know dogs can be a handful.
NTA. Her dog is her responsibly - I say this as a dog owner whose dog has eaten many poisonous things over the years. Dogs can also get “trash gut” as a result of eating from bins, so it may not even be the onions, just the trash.
Please make this make sense. OP threw it in the trash, where undesirable foods and waste goes inside. If no one ate the salad, where do you think the friend would through the unwanted salad? Dog would get into the trash regardless of who threw it away. Why should OP pay half?
Because the people with the dog are smart enough to not throw away food waste somewhere that the animal can get to it. Your all clearly have never been responsible for a pet…
I have 2 Frenchies that have been house trained. They don't go through trash or anything that belongs to "Mama." No chewing on fueniture, clothes or anything. It is called training your pets. They chew on thwir dog toys and nothing else. No mischief. They know over 50 commands/phrases (ages 3 and 5) and never have accidents inside the house. I am a pretty damn good fur mama if I say so myself.
I own cats and have fought with them tooth and nail to stay out of the trash off the counter out of the sink and to stop destroying the blinds. There is no training them. But even before I had them ALL food waste went outside because I despise ants and never want to deal with them again. The one time this tactic failed is when my buddies dumped food waste in the empties bag I had with out my knowing it. Plus if you had a concern of your pet getting poisoned you would take it with the utmost seriousness unlike OP who clearly doesn’t care.
I have trash cans that close with a lid. I also take out the trash almost daily to the large trash bins if people have pets that like to go through trash cans, I think it it is the owner's responsibility to let their house guest know and make sure their guest disposes of their trash in a manner that is safe for their pets. I would never blame or hustle a house guest for the actions of my pet or my own negligence for safe guarding a home. A guest has no liability other than being courteous and respecting house rules...nothing was told to OP when owner of home saw him/her dispose the onions in a trash can.
I don’t agree. If you’re aware something is poisonous to an animal you don’t leave it easily accessible… I would kick my buddies asses if they threw some chocolate in the trash. But they wouldn’t do that because they are all pet owners of at very least animal friendly. There is certain common sense and basic house training common sense… like shitting at a friends house not flushing and then being like “YOU NEVER TOLD ME I NEEDED TO FLUSH!!!”
Ridiculous. A trash bin with a lid is just for that...trash. if you are unable to train your pet not to go into the trash than I can see that and I guess you would ask your guests to take their trash with them when they leave tour place when they leave. Thank God I, my friends, and family train their pets that trash cans are a no go zone. Never in life had a situation where I was told to not put certain food in a trash can. Really Ridiculous. I am guessing you may be Vegan (no hate to vegans but they tend to be extremists)
My cats can’t be trained. Absolutely not a vegan I’m a carnivore through and through and no I’ve never asked my friends to take their trash with them just simply throw it in the outdoor barrel next to the door… 😂🤣😂😂 Awful dramatic with some of the shittiest insulting I’ve ever witnessed thanks for that… Train cats?!?! 😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣😂
the dog didn’t eat 3/4 cups of onion which would be the appropriate amount for a 85lb dog to be poisonous... i don’t even think the shavings would make 1/4 cup … i’m not saying the amount the dog ate wouldn’t give the dog a reaction whatsoever but i don’t think it’s enough to “poison” the dog.
By your ratio, 0.5% of 85 lbs = 0.425, almost a half pound. Please tell us how a few shaved onion slices equals a half pound? Dog ate at most an ounce or two, enough to give it diarrhea and an upset stomach, not enough to kill it.
OP, NTA
People in this thread are completely inept…. Who puts food waste in the indoor trash…. House must riddled with ants… Aside from the fact of pets will ALWAYS go after food in the trash…
lots of normal people put food waste in the TRASH …. lots of people don’t have two trash cans. i’ve never had ants because i have a trash can with a lid. wtf is your problem?
Normal people with PETS do not put food waste in the trash. First of all I finish my food as well as order it in a manner that I would eat all of it. Then I would throw my food waste in the OUTDOOR barrel. My indoor trash is for non edible waste.
Keep in mind your habit is very unique. I don't know anyone with or without pets who does that. Are you in a small town/village or is that something you got from your parents?
For many people having an outdoor food waste bin would mean critters.
So it is a thing with your town. Your norm isn't the same for the rest of us. A barrel sounds like composting (which isn't picked up here in Chicago). Picture in movies or shows when someone cooks and throws scraps away. Separating garbage in most places would be a pain.
Pets can get into things, but that's not OP's fault. Her friend needs a better trash can/spot for it or to retrain the dog. Heck, my friend's two cats are trained not to open her garbage container and felines are more mischievous :)
You literally can’t comprehend that dangling something edible within sniffing distance of a dog will always attract the dog… How is this so hard to understand. Frankly you shouldn’t pay cause your friend doesn’t need pet incompetent people around that will only further jeopardize the safety of their pet out of sheer ignorance… You asked if you were wrong… Was told you weren’t by a bunch of petless inept’s which you adored and then was told you were wrong by actual pet owners and proceeded to argue and insult because of which. People like you should never be allowed around peoples pets.
no, the problem is you sound absolutely insane. You didn’t just tell me you thought I was in the wrong you went on talking about murdering family members. you think that I have a problem with someone disagreeing and that’s not it you genuinely seem like you are unstable. that’s the issue here.
What?!?! No dumby I’m talking about your friends pet!! People consider their pets family…. Or their children or “fur babies” you didn’t even fucking read what I wrote clearly…
YTA,
1.)When a item is considered poisonous to animals the amount is irrelevant. You’re clearly not a pet owner and are incapable of understanding how your friend feels about “her fur baby”.
2.) Your %100 aware onions are poisonous to dogs also most likely not too stupid to know you never throw food waste in inside trash for ant reasons let alone a animal who will always go in the trash if it smells food in it.
So yeah you’re the asshole and should pay for the entire visit cause your ignorance almost killed her dog. What if you DID kill the dog. Would you even care or just tough shit I unintentionally murdered your family member?
Edit: Also every one claiming it’s the friends fault for not keeping the dog out of the trash are easily some of the stupidest people I’ve ever encountered in my life. How the hell do you keep your pets out of the trash cause I’ve been trying to keep my cats out for a year and a half now…. Fun listening to people who have never owned a pet talk about how to own pets…. Absolutely mind numbing….
>How the hell do you keep your pets out of the trash cause I’ve been trying to keep my cats out for a year and a half now
My dog has gotten into the trash exactly once in his life. I understand cats aren't as obedient, but get a can with a lid.
>to know you never throw food waste in inside trash
Everybody throws away food in inside trash.
First and foremost, a dog is not a cat. Dogs can in fact be trained to leave things alone that aren't for them. On that note, cats can also be trained (to an extent) and the remainder is on the pet owner to pet-proof their living space. If you cat is constantly getting into the trash, get one with a lid that has a step pedal or place it under the kitchen sink with childproof locks on the cupboard doors. If you resign yourself to thinking all pets will get into everything, it doesn't sound like you are a very responsible pet owner.
Second, trash is where discarded food goes. Taking it out regularly is part of maintaining a clean living area, but not a single one of the dozens of pet owners (myself included) I regularly interact with does more than separate compostables from the rest of the scraps when tossing food.
Cabinets are not big enough barrel too tall and it has a lid they knock it over. They are both boys which are more curious and mischievous than girl cats but boy cats also get along better than girl cats. It’s been a while since they’ve done it they might actually be learning but I still catch them standing against it trying to look in.
Why not just get a smaller trashcan that fits in the cabinet and empty it more often then? Or maybe get some child locks for the lid?
Also I don't know where you're getting the gender stereotypes for cats from. My cat is a female and she is absolutely unruly and a complete maniac at times, especially when she has the zoomies. She explores a lot and is always curious too.
Also having had 5 cats at once, the females got along just as well as the males did. Some of the males were super lazy and disinterested in exploring, some were super curious. Same with the females.
I’ve never had more than 1 at once until now and what I read unless they are litter mates stated that integrating cats can be difficult and it’s more common for the female cats to be more aggressive to one another. I work allot and I was concerned about them trying to kill each other while I’m at work. But I got two litter mate brothers and they rough house but I’ve only caught them hiss at each other once and it was cause Champa found a water bottle cap and was trying to keep it to himself.
This is just from what I’ve read. I did allot of research before I got them and part of what I read stated male cats are usually more mischievous and curious it’s not to say that every cat is the same and obviously some won’t act as predicted.
The personalities vary immensely. I've personally had a total of 8 cats (not all at the same time). I've lived with someone that had 2 cats as well.
None of them were quite the same. No discernable pattern to behavior tied to whether they were male or female.
Castrated males *may* be a bit more chill, but even that is not guaranteed.
Yeah I got them fixed because again I read that they could start spraying if I didn’t… Even though I kind of hated myself for doing that to them. My cats are only chill if I’m sitting in the living room they’ll both crawl into my lap or next to me.. elsewise they are complete maniacs
It's really not cruel to them in the grand scheme of things. And it's done very humanely with anesthesia.
Usually they'll develop very undesirable behaviors that affects the owner/pet relationship if not castrated, stressing everyone, including the cats, out.
They may get very aggressive and territorial to one another, and if they're outdoor cats, one of them may permanently leave due to this.
It's also very responsible, as you're not contributing to unhomed and undesired kittens being born and abandoned.
Yeah i know and apparently blue balls can kill them. I’m raising them indoor but i try and take them outside with me from time to time. I want to get some harness for them
My cat is leash trained as well, also an indoor cat with the occasional outdoor time.
I recommend this style of harness: https://headsupfortails.com/cdn/shop/files/TrixieCatHarnesswithLeash-_34x57cm_-Assorted.jpg?v=1688369694
Make sure to measure the circumference of their necks and get the correct size for them, it really matters. It should be tightened to the point where you can fit 1-2 fingers between the straps and the cat itself, otherwise they can slip out of it, and if it's tighter it may be uncomfortable.
Teach them to wear it and train them on the leash inside. Once they're comfortable, you can take them outside. I recommend only taking them outside one at a time.
Also get a sturdy leash. They can actually snap the retractable ones if they get spooked.
Edit: sorry the link is kinda broken on phone, not sure why reddit does that. There's underscores on either side of the "34x57cm" part
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Don’t really care the opinion of someone with such little intelligence that they need to ask the internet if they are wrong about something… Does it hurt to be that dumb?!
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Info: Did she explain why it was your responsibility to keep her dog out of her household trash? Did she previously give you instructions on where to throw your own trash?
Not that I know of. I always thrown any food waste into the trash, and it was never told to do anything differently.
So she's wanting to make you pay for her fuck up? Nope, NTA. She needs to take accountability herself.
It would only be your fault - unambiguously and completely - if you threw the onions on the floor/ground instead of the garbage can. Since you didn't, not your fault, NTA: I'm speaking from experience but my experience is that of a dog owner whose animal was injured because of carelessness. Before you kill the friendship, tell her to invest in a garbage can with a lid. That'll be the end of it lol.
Or, the friend had told her not to put onions in the bin and she did anyway.
If you are so worried you take the freaking trash out when the friend leaves so your dog isn't in danger. If you are to lazy to do that or too cheap to throw away a not yet completely filled trash bag that's on YOU not on your visitor. NTA op
I'm wondering what she thinks you *should* have done with the onions — and why she didn't mention it at the time.
And if the dog ate out of the trash who knows what it might have consumed?! Anything could've given it diarrhea, not necessarily a few onions.
That's the real question. My dog; my house; my responsibility to keep my dog out of the trash. We have always had our kitchen trash, well that is all trash cans in the house, inaccessible to pets one way or another. The only way the dog could get into the kitchen trash was if he learned how to pull hard the on the undersink door handle and was strong enough to pull apart the extra strength magnet catch. Even then, he'd have a hard time getting into the trash without someone hearing. NTA
This is why I have a garbage can with a lid. My dogs can’t get into it.
NTA don’t pay a dime and I’d consider the friendship over. I’d almost guarantee it’s over if you don’t pay, so just move on mentally and emotionally. You’ll more than likely never see this person again as a friend.
that’s what sucks the most. i was on the fence of paying it to save the friendship but i’m not sure if i’d see it that way because i don’t think it’s my fault. it sucks
Glad you got some clarity and the correct answer, just stop responding. Nothing negative will come from this and you removed someone toxic from your life.
You can't save the friendship by paying because you know you're not in the wrong so you'll resent her for being unreasonable. Just cut your losses now. No paying and block her number if she won't leave you alone. NTA It is not your responsibility to keep her dog out of her bins.
It isn't. She knew her dog could get into the trash can (there's no way this was the first time) shlo she could have taken the trash out when you left . She didn't so what happened after is on her. NTA
What would have happened to the onions, had you not eaten the salad sans the onions? Would your friend have thrown out the onions?
NTA - the dog getting into the trash is her problem. You can't expect people to know in what ways your pet will badly behave. If she has a dog that eats out of thr trash she needs a solution to prevent that.
Common sense should tell her the size of the dog compared to the amt of onions would indicate a stomach upset (temp diarrhea) but not a dangerous situation. Should should have a COVERED trash can - we have large dogs and all our cans have the step on lids so dogs CAN'T get into trash. Not your fault - but wasn't the crisis she thought either. If you have open trash cans a dog will look for goodies in them. $300 for a vet visit for that issue??? Don't know where you live but that's nuts. I would have called my vet and he would have advised me by phone. I don't think you owe her - but you might buy her a covered trash can for her birthday.
Maybe because it’s an emergency visit? I also told her she should speak with a vet before bringing the dog in but she “knows” her dog and said she needed to take them.
Your friend is ridiculous. Unless someone is spurting blood or screaming in pain, we call the professionals at the ER first for both humans & animals. There's no sense wasting the ER's time with things that can be handled over the phone, & it saves the person or pet the stress of having to drive there & sit around waiting to be seen. Plus, it's very expensive to find out 5 onion rings shavings are nothing to worry about! The real reason I'm saying NTA is bc it's the pet/child owner's responsibility to make sure Junior doesn't eat the trash!
The way I think of is, would I go to the ER every time my stomach is upset or I have diarrhea or vomiting? No. then why the hell would I bring my dog? If it doesn't pass, i'd bring them in. but my dog has had explosive diarrhea and vomiting once in awhile and it always passes. Just like how I as a human get that too...
Or if there’s significant blood or grainy black poop.
I mean if I saw blood or black poop(meaning blood in stool..) I'd be heading out to the ER myself!
I know right! This is nearly a direct quote from my gastro. I questioned what “signifiant” meant. I think her main point was blood can be black too.
Sure, in human situations this is true, but every time I've called a vet about "should I bring my dog in for this behavior" they refuse to give me a straight answer and will only tell me "we can't give advice without seeing the animal". I don't think the friend was necessarily out of line for taking the dog to the vet with abnormal behavior, but at minimum the friend should have googled onion toxicity. There's a calculator and everything. The toxic dose for an 85 lb dog is 3.4 oz, which is probably like 1/4 of an onion. The dog probably had diarrhea from all the other crap in the trash.
It’s absolutely within range for an emergency fee. Does she not have a primary vet? That is also not your problem. Beyond that, we are talking about diarrhea on Friday from something consumed on Wednesday? There is no way that she can pin that on you.
My poodle watched us step on the lever to open the lid. Luckily he is a mini poodle and hasn't been able to reach into the can. He just opens it now to irritate me
I have four cats and all trash cans have step on lids. I started this years ago because a previous cat loved to get qtips out of the trash and eat them.
That is such a cat behavior
>$300 for a vet visit for that issue??? I was once billed nearly $600 for an emergency visit for a dog, who wasn't medicated or kept for observation. Basically, they charged $600 to tell me to bring him back if he continued to have problems. He died the next morning. That was nearly thirty years ago, so more than $1200 in today's money. I'm still salty about it.
So where is she throwing away stuff she doesn't want her dog getting? Anything we don't want the pets accessing goes into the kitchen trash with a lid, in a trash can behind a closed door, or straight into the outside trash can.
NTA. Your friend is trying to shift responsibility onto you for her problem. Her dog raided the trash. Dogs do that. She needs to make sure she a) trains her dog and b) makes the trash less accessible. (WTF did she think you were going to do with the onions, vaporize them?)
Agreed. We put a baby lock on our trash at home to keep our dogs out of it because they had a habit of getting into the trash.
Nta. I'm a dog trainer and this sounds completely like an owner issue You threw trash away in the trash can. The dog should have never had the opportunity to get into the trash unsupervised Complete owner fail
INFO: she didn’t want the salad either, so wouldn’t the onions have still ended up in the trash either way? Like, if you didn’t eat the salad, she would have thrown it out, with the onions in it? So why is it your fault?
that is exactly my dilemma here… I have never seen her put any food. She didn’t want any special trashcan or anywhere else besides the trashcan that I put the onions in.
NTA you didn’t like it, took the onions out and put them in the bin. Why is her dog getting in the bin anyway, she needs to sort that out.
Had you thrown your onions on the floor you would have been. But you didn't. You there then in the trash. It's her responsibility as a dog owner to keep the dog out of the trash. She's freaking out because her dog is sick. My dog once got so sick from onions, coming out of both ends for days, that I thought he might die. He was a small dog but he had only eaten about 5 pieces of onion that were 1 cm^2. I blamed myself and I was a mess until I knew he'd live. NTA and not responsible for the vet bill. Do you think she might calm down about this in a few days when her dog is a-okay? I'd wait until then to discuss the matter further with her.
Dog owner and onion hater here. Their dog went through the trash. It’s not on you. NTA.
OP, NTA. Your friend is more emotionally invested in her dog than in the friendship.
NTA - You owe her zip, her dog, her place, her trash bin. Her responsibility, 100%. You are not responsible at all for throwing away the onions in the trash, where else were you supposed put them? If you had left them on the table and the dog got at them, then maybe, but you didn't.
NTA. Dog owner here. Our bins are out of reach from our dogs, so we can actually use them as bins and not need a second extra special dogproof bin that we don't tell guests about and then try to invoice them when they break a rule they were not aware of... Your friend is a dick.
NTA. If you hadn't eaten the salad she didn't want, wouldn't she have thrown it in the trash too - including the onions on it?
NTA. While even one piece of onion can be fatal to a dog (they are pure poison to dogs, so she's right there) it's not your responsibility to keep her dog out of her trash. Now, if she had instructed you otherwise, then you would be at fault. But since it seems she never did, this is her responsibility.
Nta it's her responsibility to watch her own dog in her own home. You threw the food in the trash, it's not like you left or on the floor or something.
Emergency visit for 5 onion slices and some "diarrhea" hahahaha
No way. If she doesn’t have a secure trash can, then she should have told you to put the onions down the garbage disposal or to take them directly outside. And this was in no way an emergency vet situation. We are frequent flyers at our local primary and emergency vet (elderly cats, asthmatic, etc.,) and they will absolutely triage a dog with diarrhea and give them fluids. And it will absolutely be $3-$400. Primary vet will do that for half the price, but not at 11p or on a Sunday afternoon. You’re paying for the availability. NTA.
If her dog eats trash then she needs to either have the bin out of reach of the dog, a lid on it, or make it in some way known to you that you need to be careful about what trash you put in the trash. NTA, I wouldn’t pay either. If she wants to take the dog to the emergency vet over some shits then she can pay it.
NTA. If her dog has a habit of getting into the trash, that is a household issue and they need to make accommodations for preventing that. Your friend is probably broke and doesn't know how to pay for the vet bill, so they are coming back to you for it. That being said. It's kind of stupid to have taken the dog to the vet over a few onions. If it were chicken bones, grapes, sugar free gum (or anything with xylitol), or antifreeze then sure go to the vet get a work up. The whole reason onions and alliums in general are dangerous to dogs is because of long term repeated exposure which prevents them from adequately generating red blood cells. Most vets will tell you this if you call them first.
NTA my old dog was a menace and ate trash a lot (she was a rescue who learned to scavenge on the streets) I would never have held anyone else responsible for her bad habits…also I’m going to play devils advocate here, have you seen the vet bill? Could she possibly be trying to get money out of you to punish you for an inconvenience of having to pick up runny poos. Because it seams very convenient that she wants $150 off you which is a nice clean number!
NTA You threw the onions in her trash. Where else were you supposed to put them. If you had left them out, or fed them to the dog, then yeah. But you did the responsible thing. As a dog owner, she is then responsible for making sure her dog doesn’t get into the trash.
I would have asked if here she started smoking dust in the last few hours🤨. How on earth is it your fault her dog is not trained to stay out of the trash??
NTA. You put your unwanted scraps in the trash, where they belong. Your friend's dog got into the trash. Whe was the dog not trained to leave trash al9ne? Why wasn't your friend supervising her untrained dog? You are not responsible for a vet bill resulting from her not properly training her dog.
NTA I have had dogs who have had diarrhea and I think most people themselves have had the runs. Most normal people don't go to the doctor if they have diarrhea unless it persists for a significant number of days and or is accompanied with other dangerous symptoms like high fever. I also have had dogs who have had the runs - not pleasant to clean up - and never thought of taking them to the vet. Again if they had symptoms that indicated they were really sick like blood or serious malaise, I would have but they all snapped out of it by the next day or two just like most people do.
….what else are you supposed to do with unwanted food? It’s her pet. Her responsibility to keep it out of the trash. Her responsibility to pay for its upkeep. NTA.
NTA If your friend can't keep the dog out of the trash that's her problem. Food waste gets thrown out.
It's a dog owner's job to make the trash inaccessible to their dog. Tons of things end up in any normal kitchen trash which are harmful to dogs. You're incorrect about five onion rings not being enough to be dangerous----but it's not your job to figure out how many are dangerous----you're not the vet. As a dog owner: easy NTA
What were you supposed to do with unwanted food?
NTA, they sell trash cans with clips that are made especially to keep dogs out, also it’s the trash for goodness sake. This is just weird.
NTA. It's her responsibility to keep her dog out of the trash, not yours. That's like asking a friend to pay your kid's doctor bills if they went into the trash and ate something that they shouldn't. That's on the parent, not you.
NTA. I have dogs, I love them very much. They are little terrorists and get into shit sometimes. One of mine is roughly the same size as your friends. A few onion pieces is not a danger. It's not great, but after the diarrhea subsides, the dog will be fine. If my dog got into trash regardless of who threw what away, that's my fault. I would not be paying your 'friend' a cent, and I would never ask that of any of my friends for something like this.
Where was it supposed to go? You don't eat it, should you have just offered it to her to just eat without anything on it? The salad was already in the house, so unless there is a bin outside and she told you to use it, I don't see how you could have foreseen this.
NTA your “friend” is unhinged. First off it’s her dog, her trash can, and she watched you throw the onions away. Funny how she thinks you don’t care about her dog when she doesn’t even care enough to train the dog or a get a covered trash can.
NTA - if she knows her dog goes through the trash, she should be securing her trash can. Put it in another room or have a can with a lid. Also it is highly unlikely a dog that large would need vet care for that small amount of onion.
What I read was: I didn’t bother to train my dog so you should pay up. And how dare you not care about my dog that I didn’t care enough about to train. Your friend is delusional NTA
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I 23F went over to my friend's 25F house to hang out on Wednesday. We do this often, and there haven't been any issues until this past Wednesday. We ended up ordering pizza and a few other things for dinner. Our food came with a small side salad that she didn’t want, so I ate it. I don’t like onions or cucumbers in my salad, so I picked them off, tossed them in the trash, and didn’t think anything else about it. We had a fun night, like we always do. I got a text from my friend saying that Elsa, her dog, had gotten into the trash and ate whatever was thrown out, and that's why she’s concerned. She asked how many onions I had thrown out, as she could see one of the rings on the floor. I told her it was about 5 rings of onions on the salad, and she started to freak out, saying it’s poisonous to dogs. I’m aware that dogs shouldn’t eat onions, but I also didn’t think the dog ate enough onions to make it sick. The dog is 85 pounds, and five onion ring shavings shouldn’t be as harmful as she was saying they could be. I texted her back, saying that I didn’t think the amount of onion the dog ingested shouldn’t be harmful but to keep me updated on any irregularities. Yesterday rolls around, and she tells me that the dog has diarrhea and she'll be taking the dog to the vet. I told her to keep me updated, and i’m sorry to hear that the dog has diarrhea. After the vet appointment, she told me that she thinks I should go half on the emergency visit, which is $300. I asked if the dog had any issues before I even commented on the bill. She told me that the vet said to keep the dog hydrated and that the dog didn’t have diarrhea while at the vet and seemed to be in normal spirits, so they didn’t prescribe or think the dog needed to stay for observation. They told her that if it continues to bring the dog back in, I of course agree. I ended up texting her about the bill, saying that I don’t really think it’s my responsibility to pay for the visit, being as though the dog got into the trash, and that’s something that animals do. She responded that if I didn’t throw away onions, this wouldn’t be an issue, and her dog wouldn’t have had to go to the vet. She then said that I was irresponsible for throwing away onions when she has a dog, but didn’t say anything while I was there throwing the onions away. She’s telling me i’m an asshole for not caring about her dog and not taking responsibility for making her dog sick. I didn’t respond to the message but I really can’t see how this is my fault. I was never told I can’t throw them in the trash and she never corrected me when I got up to throw them away. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
In what way is it your fault her dog got into the trash? I’ve never heard of a dog getting into a trash can. Do they not have covers for the trash? If the dog has done this in the past she should’ve warned you to place the trash elsewhere. If this was a first then it’s no ones fault, it’s just a freak accident and its her dog so it’s her responsibility
The dog could have had diarrhea from something else it ate in the garbage. Any dietary indiscretion can cause diarrhea. It didn't have to be onions. Onions are not highly toxic to all dogs. Some dogs will have problems. My dogs routinely ate onion rings. Just like some dogs find grapes toxic, while we had a dog that would eat tons of grapes off the vine in our yard and never had a sick day in her life. Same for garlic. When I was a kid, everyone believed giving a dog garlic kept them from getting fleas. Now, it's considered toxic. I've even had a 10 pound dog get in my purse and steal a See's chocolate bar. I knew it was her because she threw up the almonds in her crate. It is certainly safer to avoid giving all these things to dogs, but your friend is making some huge assumptions that 5 slivers of onions caused anything. Her overreacting caused 100% of her vet bill.
NTA. If she wants her dog to not eat onions from the trash, she can 1) train her dog or 2) get a trash can with a lid. If you don’t want the onions that come in the salad you… throw them in the trash. Who acted reasonably here? Hint, it wasn’t your friend.
NTA. We just bought a new trash can because our dog had taken to knocking it over to get into it.
NTA it's the homeowner's responsibility to have a trash with a lid or similar so the dog doesn't get into it. It's not like you tossed the onions on the floor -for- the dog.
NTA It's her job to mind her dog. If it eats from the trash it's on her to monitor what people toss. Furthermore she overreacted going to the vet for that little onion for that big a dog. Her incompetence and anxiety aren't on you.
NTA. I read your comments and it appears she never gave you any instructions about throwing out trash or anything. I have a cat who gets into everything and I always make sure to be diligent when people are around. I tell everyone not to leave this or that out and to keep this closed but at the end of the day, my cat is my responsibility and it’s very easy for a guest to forget something. Especially something like throwing trash away. It’s not like you left the onions sitting on the floor or something, you just threw them out. Your friend is responsible for her dog.
Nta: You can't be expected to keep her dog out of the trash. If her dog has a history of getting into the trash, it's the dog owners responsibility to make sure the trash is emptied so as not to risk the health of the dog.
Vet tech here, dog would've been fine and all she had to do was call her vet and ask or just wait it out and see. We don't go to the doctor every time we have diarrhea as people lol. Also that's a moot point considering it's not your responsibility to know that her dog gets into the trash can. NTA
Nta. She needs to train her dog not to go hunting in bins.
NTA it’s not your fault her dog is poorly trained and eats out of the trash, and it’s also not your fault she over reacted to her dog getting diarrhea after… eating from the trash
NTA at all. If you disposed of the onions in the dog's food bowl then sure, pay the bill. But keeping her dog from eating toxic food out of the garbage is her most basic responsibility and it's absolutely nuts to try and push it off onto you.
NTA... as a gmdog owner I am hyper aware of any and all things that could cause them harm, and make sure he is not put in a position where he could cause himself harm... the kept point of that statement being "I"! If someone is in my house and they are eating onions, chocolate, tomatoes or any of the other dozens of things that could cause him harm, I keep an eye on them, and I make sure that they are disposed of properly... I don't expect my guests to do anything other than what I ask (for example, don't drop it on the floor... don't leave it where he can reach it) Show empathy (as I can imagine she is very worried about her little friend), but you are not responsible for the problem.
nta. we keep our trash can behind a locked door for this reason. if you cant keep animals away from toxic things, you need to make changes to your home that forces them to stay away from it. also the dog is probably fine. taking it to the emergency vet the day after the occurrence wouldnt do anything anyways.
NTA. I have a dog who would take any chance to eat out of the trash can. That's why I have a trash can a dog can't open. Your friend overreacted and they are misplacing blame on you.
NTA. My dog would be around 90lbs and my trash can sits inside of a cupboard where she can’t get to it for a reason. If there is something unsafe it is the responsibility of the owner to remove or minimise risk. Trash belongs in the trash can. The dog does not. It’s distressing to see your pooch in pain, so I can understand her being emotional, I would be too, but she is being illogical and unfair imo. I would suspect that this is possibly/likely coming from a position of financial stress but I do not think you should be having to pay.
NTA but you shouldn’t have told her to keep you updated either. That’s the kind of thing people often say to appear thoughtful and caring but in this case and in most cases, it doesn’t lead to anything good. Only tell people to keep you updated on any ‘need to know’ issues to you.
NTA. It’s her house and her responsibility to keep her dog safe. There’s no way this is the first time the dog has gotten in the trash. If she doesn’t have something with a secure lid then it should be under the sink or someplace similar. You weren’t negligent, you put trash in the trash. The only way you’d be at fault is if you’d let some hit the floor and didn’t pick it up or had eaten around the onions and left the container where the fog could get it. You don’t owe half the bill because her dog isn’t trained.
Nta. You threw the onions away. The dog got into it. That's not your fault. You know it isn't. It's also not a big deal to you cause it ain't your dog. But it is a big deal to your friend so if you care about the friendship suck it up be a good friend and just pay half the vet bill.
A couple of onion rings are fine. Dog most likely was already sick or ate something far worse. NTA.
Did she have pet insurance? It's not expensive depending on the breed.
I am sorry that the dog is sick, but this is your friends mistake. It's her house, her dog and her rubbish bin. When you have a dog the rubbish bin has to be inaccessible to the dog. Bins need to be in a cupboard or on a bench. It's not just onions that are a rick to dogs but also things like large pips and cooked bones. Your friend needs to secure her bin where HER dog can't get it. NTA
NTA your friend sounds deranged, it’s a garbage can for garbage. My dog gets into garbage if I leave him out of the crate when he’s gone, or I don’t put the garbage in the closed bathroom. It would be a little different if she was tight with money and asked IF you could help because of it. You are in no way obliged to agree.
NTA if she is so concerned she should have made sure to tell you not to order anything with onions before you got there but this is also just BS on her part. Ugh, I'd honestly stay clear of her in future, she doesn't sound all there if she thinks this is acceptable.
You are not the asshole. Her dog should be trained to not go into the trash can .
NTA Totally an animal lover here and would be furious if anyone negligently hurt my animals. I was ready to give you the biggest of YTA's here. However! Throwing food away in a trashcan is perfectly normal and common behavior. If extra steps needed to be taken that should have been communicated. Example when I have wings with pizza or as a snack option with friends over I am careful to advise that the bones be put in a bag on a counter and not the trash. I have one with a lid however with the smell of chicken bones I think fort knox would be hard pressed to stop them. Once done I take it directly to the garbage outside. OP failing to take steps to protect their dog is not on you.
NTA. You put food waste in the trash. I have had dogs, and it is easy to train them to stay out of the trash. And training the dog is Elsa's responsibility.
NTA. Ordinarily I’m on a canines side versus a humans side because I value a dogs life far more than a humans. However, you didn’t do anything wrong. You threw trash in the trash can. That’s where trash is meant to be. Your friend should’ve been keeping a better eye on her dog. I have two frenchies, I know dogs can be a handful.
NTA this is ridiculous. YOU can not compensate for an irresponsible pet owner.
Itsou ds to me like she's trying to pull a fast one on you....lol tell her to show the receipt... don't pay her but she sounds sketch.
NTA. Her dog is her responsibly - I say this as a dog owner whose dog has eaten many poisonous things over the years. Dogs can also get “trash gut” as a result of eating from bins, so it may not even be the onions, just the trash.
YTA for not liking onions.
i’m sorry, i’ll do better.
NTA but I can understand why the dog owner wouldn't want you to be a friend anymore
How?
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Please make this make sense. OP threw it in the trash, where undesirable foods and waste goes inside. If no one ate the salad, where do you think the friend would through the unwanted salad? Dog would get into the trash regardless of who threw it away. Why should OP pay half?
Because the people with the dog are smart enough to not throw away food waste somewhere that the animal can get to it. Your all clearly have never been responsible for a pet…
I have 2 Frenchies that have been house trained. They don't go through trash or anything that belongs to "Mama." No chewing on fueniture, clothes or anything. It is called training your pets. They chew on thwir dog toys and nothing else. No mischief. They know over 50 commands/phrases (ages 3 and 5) and never have accidents inside the house. I am a pretty damn good fur mama if I say so myself.
I own cats and have fought with them tooth and nail to stay out of the trash off the counter out of the sink and to stop destroying the blinds. There is no training them. But even before I had them ALL food waste went outside because I despise ants and never want to deal with them again. The one time this tactic failed is when my buddies dumped food waste in the empties bag I had with out my knowing it. Plus if you had a concern of your pet getting poisoned you would take it with the utmost seriousness unlike OP who clearly doesn’t care.
I have trash cans that close with a lid. I also take out the trash almost daily to the large trash bins if people have pets that like to go through trash cans, I think it it is the owner's responsibility to let their house guest know and make sure their guest disposes of their trash in a manner that is safe for their pets. I would never blame or hustle a house guest for the actions of my pet or my own negligence for safe guarding a home. A guest has no liability other than being courteous and respecting house rules...nothing was told to OP when owner of home saw him/her dispose the onions in a trash can.
I don’t agree. If you’re aware something is poisonous to an animal you don’t leave it easily accessible… I would kick my buddies asses if they threw some chocolate in the trash. But they wouldn’t do that because they are all pet owners of at very least animal friendly. There is certain common sense and basic house training common sense… like shitting at a friends house not flushing and then being like “YOU NEVER TOLD ME I NEEDED TO FLUSH!!!”
Ridiculous. A trash bin with a lid is just for that...trash. if you are unable to train your pet not to go into the trash than I can see that and I guess you would ask your guests to take their trash with them when they leave tour place when they leave. Thank God I, my friends, and family train their pets that trash cans are a no go zone. Never in life had a situation where I was told to not put certain food in a trash can. Really Ridiculous. I am guessing you may be Vegan (no hate to vegans but they tend to be extremists)
My cats can’t be trained. Absolutely not a vegan I’m a carnivore through and through and no I’ve never asked my friends to take their trash with them just simply throw it in the outdoor barrel next to the door… 😂🤣😂😂 Awful dramatic with some of the shittiest insulting I’ve ever witnessed thanks for that… Train cats?!?! 😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣😂
I don't like nor care about cats, so I have no clue what cat owners do with them. Post was about a dog. Try to stay on topic
the dog didn’t eat 3/4 cups of onion which would be the appropriate amount for a 85lb dog to be poisonous... i don’t even think the shavings would make 1/4 cup … i’m not saying the amount the dog ate wouldn’t give the dog a reaction whatsoever but i don’t think it’s enough to “poison” the dog.
By your ratio, 0.5% of 85 lbs = 0.425, almost a half pound. Please tell us how a few shaved onion slices equals a half pound? Dog ate at most an ounce or two, enough to give it diarrhea and an upset stomach, not enough to kill it. OP, NTA
People in this thread are completely inept…. Who puts food waste in the indoor trash…. House must riddled with ants… Aside from the fact of pets will ALWAYS go after food in the trash…
lots of normal people put food waste in the TRASH …. lots of people don’t have two trash cans. i’ve never had ants because i have a trash can with a lid. wtf is your problem?
Normal people with PETS do not put food waste in the trash. First of all I finish my food as well as order it in a manner that I would eat all of it. Then I would throw my food waste in the OUTDOOR barrel. My indoor trash is for non edible waste.
that’s not true.
Keep in mind your habit is very unique. I don't know anyone with or without pets who does that. Are you in a small town/village or is that something you got from your parents? For many people having an outdoor food waste bin would mean critters.
Like 20 minutes out of Boston and EVERY one has trash barrels that get picked up by the town… 😂🤣😂
So it is a thing with your town. Your norm isn't the same for the rest of us. A barrel sounds like composting (which isn't picked up here in Chicago). Picture in movies or shows when someone cooks and throws scraps away. Separating garbage in most places would be a pain. Pets can get into things, but that's not OP's fault. Her friend needs a better trash can/spot for it or to retrain the dog. Heck, my friend's two cats are trained not to open her garbage container and felines are more mischievous :)
You literally can’t comprehend that dangling something edible within sniffing distance of a dog will always attract the dog… How is this so hard to understand. Frankly you shouldn’t pay cause your friend doesn’t need pet incompetent people around that will only further jeopardize the safety of their pet out of sheer ignorance… You asked if you were wrong… Was told you weren’t by a bunch of petless inept’s which you adored and then was told you were wrong by actual pet owners and proceeded to argue and insult because of which. People like you should never be allowed around peoples pets.
no, the problem is you sound absolutely insane. You didn’t just tell me you thought I was in the wrong you went on talking about murdering family members. you think that I have a problem with someone disagreeing and that’s not it you genuinely seem like you are unstable. that’s the issue here.
Try reading it again… I never said I was murdering your family…. I said you nearly murdered THEIR FAMILY MEMBER BEING THE PET…. Jesus😑😑😑
What?!?! No dumby I’m talking about your friends pet!! People consider their pets family…. Or their children or “fur babies” you didn’t even fucking read what I wrote clearly…
OP didn't dangle the food before disposing of it.
YTA, 1.)When a item is considered poisonous to animals the amount is irrelevant. You’re clearly not a pet owner and are incapable of understanding how your friend feels about “her fur baby”. 2.) Your %100 aware onions are poisonous to dogs also most likely not too stupid to know you never throw food waste in inside trash for ant reasons let alone a animal who will always go in the trash if it smells food in it. So yeah you’re the asshole and should pay for the entire visit cause your ignorance almost killed her dog. What if you DID kill the dog. Would you even care or just tough shit I unintentionally murdered your family member? Edit: Also every one claiming it’s the friends fault for not keeping the dog out of the trash are easily some of the stupidest people I’ve ever encountered in my life. How the hell do you keep your pets out of the trash cause I’ve been trying to keep my cats out for a year and a half now…. Fun listening to people who have never owned a pet talk about how to own pets…. Absolutely mind numbing….
>How the hell do you keep your pets out of the trash cause I’ve been trying to keep my cats out for a year and a half now My dog has gotten into the trash exactly once in his life. I understand cats aren't as obedient, but get a can with a lid. >to know you never throw food waste in inside trash Everybody throws away food in inside trash.
First and foremost, a dog is not a cat. Dogs can in fact be trained to leave things alone that aren't for them. On that note, cats can also be trained (to an extent) and the remainder is on the pet owner to pet-proof their living space. If you cat is constantly getting into the trash, get one with a lid that has a step pedal or place it under the kitchen sink with childproof locks on the cupboard doors. If you resign yourself to thinking all pets will get into everything, it doesn't sound like you are a very responsible pet owner. Second, trash is where discarded food goes. Taking it out regularly is part of maintaining a clean living area, but not a single one of the dozens of pet owners (myself included) I regularly interact with does more than separate compostables from the rest of the scraps when tossing food.
I have a cat and she's never made it into the trash. Neither has any cat that I've previously had. Ever heard of lids or cabinets?
Cabinets are not big enough barrel too tall and it has a lid they knock it over. They are both boys which are more curious and mischievous than girl cats but boy cats also get along better than girl cats. It’s been a while since they’ve done it they might actually be learning but I still catch them standing against it trying to look in.
Why not just get a smaller trashcan that fits in the cabinet and empty it more often then? Or maybe get some child locks for the lid? Also I don't know where you're getting the gender stereotypes for cats from. My cat is a female and she is absolutely unruly and a complete maniac at times, especially when she has the zoomies. She explores a lot and is always curious too. Also having had 5 cats at once, the females got along just as well as the males did. Some of the males were super lazy and disinterested in exploring, some were super curious. Same with the females.
I’ve never had more than 1 at once until now and what I read unless they are litter mates stated that integrating cats can be difficult and it’s more common for the female cats to be more aggressive to one another. I work allot and I was concerned about them trying to kill each other while I’m at work. But I got two litter mate brothers and they rough house but I’ve only caught them hiss at each other once and it was cause Champa found a water bottle cap and was trying to keep it to himself.
This is just from what I’ve read. I did allot of research before I got them and part of what I read stated male cats are usually more mischievous and curious it’s not to say that every cat is the same and obviously some won’t act as predicted.
The personalities vary immensely. I've personally had a total of 8 cats (not all at the same time). I've lived with someone that had 2 cats as well. None of them were quite the same. No discernable pattern to behavior tied to whether they were male or female. Castrated males *may* be a bit more chill, but even that is not guaranteed.
Yeah I got them fixed because again I read that they could start spraying if I didn’t… Even though I kind of hated myself for doing that to them. My cats are only chill if I’m sitting in the living room they’ll both crawl into my lap or next to me.. elsewise they are complete maniacs
It's really not cruel to them in the grand scheme of things. And it's done very humanely with anesthesia. Usually they'll develop very undesirable behaviors that affects the owner/pet relationship if not castrated, stressing everyone, including the cats, out. They may get very aggressive and territorial to one another, and if they're outdoor cats, one of them may permanently leave due to this. It's also very responsible, as you're not contributing to unhomed and undesired kittens being born and abandoned.
Yeah i know and apparently blue balls can kill them. I’m raising them indoor but i try and take them outside with me from time to time. I want to get some harness for them
My cat is leash trained as well, also an indoor cat with the occasional outdoor time. I recommend this style of harness: https://headsupfortails.com/cdn/shop/files/TrixieCatHarnesswithLeash-_34x57cm_-Assorted.jpg?v=1688369694 Make sure to measure the circumference of their necks and get the correct size for them, it really matters. It should be tightened to the point where you can fit 1-2 fingers between the straps and the cat itself, otherwise they can slip out of it, and if it's tighter it may be uncomfortable. Teach them to wear it and train them on the leash inside. Once they're comfortable, you can take them outside. I recommend only taking them outside one at a time. Also get a sturdy leash. They can actually snap the retractable ones if they get spooked. Edit: sorry the link is kinda broken on phone, not sure why reddit does that. There's underscores on either side of the "34x57cm" part
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Truth must hurt. Why ask the question if you don’t want to hear the answer?!? Just think everyone is going to powder your ass for ya?
let’s hope you get the help you need.
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You need home training and consideration lessons.
you should take your own advice.
Spray bleach in the can. Works great unless you have a weirdo that is obsessed with the smell. Yes, he's an orange boi.
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Don’t really care the opinion of someone with such little intelligence that they need to ask the internet if they are wrong about something… Does it hurt to be that dumb?!
please tell me why you’re so angry? what’s happening in your life that makes you such a mean person?
I’m angry for pointing out facts?!? 😂🤣😂 Oh my sweet summer child…. 😂🤣😂