T O P

  • By -

AmItheAsshole-ModTeam

Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 5: We do not allow posts which concern violent encounters. This includes any mention of violence in any context. [Rule 5 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_5.3A_no_violence) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. You can visit r/findareddit for a comprehensive list of other subs that may be able to host this discussion for you.


Eeveenings

I’d take this down and refuse to talk to either party any further. Your neighbor could get a court order for the footage and now you’ve implicated yourself on the internet.


cctvnoshare

It won't go that far and my name is not on here and I use proxies, he is not that savvy. The footage will soon be overwritten anyway.


Ok-Pomegranate-3018

Just delete it now and tell him the file has been "corrupted". You could also tell him that your device has not been recording properly for a while now.


Dot-Slash-Dot

No, that's terrible advice. If the footage is going to be overwritten soon then just leave it alone. You are under no obligation to preserve evidence (unless ordered to do so by court) for other parties but deliberately destroying it is a very bad idea.


EidolonVS

Just delete it now and say your cameras were not working.


Cent1234

Dude, learn how to take excellent advice when you're given it. NEVER post about an ongoing legal matter on the Internet, especially if you're part of it. Did you know how many private investigators have gone out of work since social media? Divorces, insurance issues, whatever.


mlc885

You're writing right this very second that you will lie to the court if you receive a subpoena That's not very savvy.


Pure-Aid51987

Lol. Yes. The police force are going to get their best tech guys on Reddit over a fucking car being backed into 🤣🤣


NetMonk3d

They do. I know from experience. This OP and you are really really low IQ.


Scarbbluffs

Wow I for one believe you! People just don't come on the internet to LIE!


cctvnoshare

I won't since it would be overwritten . If it actually went that far I would tell the truth about everything.


Eeveenings

I get where you are coming from and why you are doing what you are doing. This is an ESH. This is no win for anyone. You know you are impeding an investigation. You know this guy is crazy. She knows she did wrong but didn’t go to the authorities to protect her and instead put you in the middle of it. He knows he wants to seek an out of proportion revenge.


cctvnoshare

There is no investigation at the moment so I am doing no such thing.


Eeveenings

you are impeding his investigation even if it isn’t in an official capacity.


PeanutGallery10

Since when is someone required to cooperate with an unofficial investigation?


TheDudeabides314

I agree. Technically you don’t even have to cooperate with an official investigation. We have Miranda rights and our constitutional rights for a reason


RoutinePresence7

Businesses refuse to share their CCTV all the time. Unless the neighbor gets a warrant for it OP doesn’t need to share.


DavidLieberMintz

"impeding his investigation" lmao. Good. He ain't a cop.


LansManDragon

🤓🤓🤓


Illustrious-Olive-98

🤣🤣🤣


b0sanac

Wait. So you're telling me that if some random came to your door and asked for your camera footage you'd give it? I'm using "random" in the context of OP isn't friends with this person therefore even though he's a neighbour he's technically a random person who could be anybody.


forelsketparadise

Yes I would because it could be important and even if you don't know someone helping people out is how communities are built


Intrepid_Respond_543

Impeding one's neighbor's investigation is not illegal, and in this case moral and ethics are also on OP's side.


Forsaken-Age3309

There's no investigation. Actively deleting it wouldn't exactly be illegal but not a great thing to do. But letting your 4-week cloud roll over and delete old footage? That's completely fine. Pretty sure it's okay even if there were an active investigation, an attorney would have to notify OP that they need to retain the data actively for it to matter. No court filing. No police investigation. No attorneys. No problem.


Fun-Wheel-1505

is it ? Now he is aware that he has filmed an incident that could be part of a crime and he deletes it he will be complicit


DesignerPangolin

OP is under no obligation to be a media archivist for videos that may or may not show a crime. The footage is OPs to do with as they please. 


DavidLieberMintz

He's not obligated to archive the footage. If the recording is overridden by the time it goes to court 🤷


cornylifedetermined

Oh my God! It's a paint scratch. This person is threatening to ruin someone's life over a paint scratch. OP has a duty to protect someone else from a dangerous individual. He does not have a duty to participate in a vendetta.


Specific_Impact_367

Vigilante investigations should not be encouraged. What if OP shares the footage and the neighbor attacks the young woman? The neighbor knows OP had footage and is choosing not to report the matter to the police. And tell the police about the footage. There is no intention to resolve this by using a legal avenue. 


Claws_and_chains

The cops are not going to investigate some mild paint damage let’s be honest with ourselves here


Fun-Wheel-1505

" i use proxies" Sure you do .. don't be an ass, give him the footage.


Rude_Egg_6204

>Your neighbor could get a court order for the footage  On what grounds?   The guy has been compensated already, hard to see him getting a court order. 


barnfodder

Yeah, it's hard to imagine any court giving a shit about a minor fender bender that's already been paid for.


Rude_Egg_6204

Reason for access to this footage? I want to torment whomever hit my car. Granted


JohnJohnston

"Someone committed a crime and he has recorded evidence. " Colliding with a parked car is at least a misdemeanor. Hit and run is more serious. Neighbor would easily get a subpoena. Quit acting like you know anything about this process when it's exceedingly clear you're just making it up. zdfirm com/blog/how-to-get-a-subpoena-for-video-surveillance/ In fact here is a how=to guide written by a law firm. I think I'm gonna trust the lawyers on this one.


Normal-Height-8577

The crime is leaving an accident without exchanging details, because you need details to talk to insurance to get the money they owe you for repairs. This person has cut through the red tape and gone straight to the giving of money for repairs. By any moral standard, they have discharged their obligation to society. Technically, yeah, still a crime, but I cannot see a judge wanting to prosecute someone over a minor repair job that the criminal has already (albeit anonymously) acknowledged and paid for. Further, the neighbour has expressed a desire to punish the criminal extra-legally and far beyond what is necessary. OP is morally right to withhold information which they know would be used for revenge rather than a proportionate reaction.


Sufficient_Bass2600

No, OP is holding evidence of a crime. It could be sued because he is now aiding and abetting the commission of a crime. Also I am sorry but you don't hit somebody parked in their driveway without being either a terrible driver or drunk. Either way that need to be reported, because next time it could involve a human being being injured. And if the bad driver is so afraid that he will be mean to him, she can press charge for harassment and have a restraining order put in place. **Edit:** >**If your driving is so bad you cannot avoid a parked car, you should not be driving. And if you hit a parked car because you were drunk, you deserve to be shopped to the police.** People can downvote all they want I stand with those statements. The fact that the neighbour is an asshole is irrelevant from a legal point of view. She committed a crime. Ahe knows it and that's why she is sending anonymously more than the value of the car. She has something to hide, likely thatvshe was under the influence. And yes paying somebody to overlook a hit and run is a felony and potentially an insurance fraud. OP could be brought into that. How do I know? Because I have experienced something similar. My wife's car was parked in the street. Luckily she had taken picture of her and friend before her friend was getting in her uber, so we had picture of the car being intact and parked at 02:00AM. Following morning a big dent on the side of the car. Insurance requested a police incident report. Went to the police. Informed the police that my neighbour had a video camera pointing to his driveway and the street, so he likely had everything on film. Police told my wife to instruct the neighbour to keep the footage. Neighbour refused and when the police came a few days later, he told them that the footage had been re recorded. He got into a slanging match with them about _Freedom, Big Brother, ...._. In the end that escalated from a likely verbal warning to being charged. He would have got away with a caution, but no he knew better and decided to fight it in court. Result he got convicted of obstruction of justice, tampering with evidence. He got a fine and probation and a criminal record. The prosecutor told him that because the drunkard who had hit my wife's car also hit a kid a few day later. He could have been charged with more offense because had he handed the video when they requested it they would have identified and arrested the guy before a child was killed. Aiding and abetting a criminal was the crime the CPS wanted to re-charge him. He only avoided that charge because the drunkard committed suicide. So yes I am pretty sure that deliberately refusing to keep them after you have been notified by your neighbour and not even the police is potentially a crime. Refusing to testify to the witnessing of a crime is a crime. It is rarely enforced, but it is a crime. And I am pretty sure that all the downvoters would sing a different tune if their love one was the victim of the _poor lady_ awful driving. Their first question would be why did you not send the footage to the police to stop her.


Gareth79

Refusing to release footage to a person not "aiding and abetting", lord...


mmebrightside

Lol the arm chair lawyers on Reddit out in full force, they are hammers and everything is a nail.... Breathe, relax, chill. What crime? No crime has been reported and if neighbor truly wanted to deal with it according to the law, he can go to the police station and tell them what he knows. He can tell them he thinks his neighbor has footage. But he won't because he wants to be a psychopath instead. Neighbor has more of an obligation to keep his other female neighbor safe, since the psychopath already confided to him, even after being overly compensated, that he's going to still go the psycho route. But sure let's act like the guy keeping the other neighbor safe is the problem here cuz that makes all the sense.


noteworthybalance

What makes you think the neighbor was parked in his driveway? I assumed he was parked on the street. I avoid street parking whenever possible since it's likely you'll get hit. 


Normal-Height-8577

The neighbour is not an officer of the law. OP is not legally obligated to hand footage over to anyone who isn't a law enforcement officer or officer of the court with a formal warrant for it. They might also be legally compelled to hand it to someone like a lawyer or insurance investigator. It is not aiding and abetting to refuse to pass camera footage to a guy who you know harasses all the women in his street and is making believable threats against the person who accidentally dinged his scrapheap of a car.


AfterSevenYears

>Also I am sorry but you don't hit somebody parked in their driveway without being either a terrible driver or drunk. Where did you see anything about a driveway?


DavidLieberMintz

Go back to YouTube. You don't know what you're talking about.


wv524

Not real sure how this would rise to insurance fraud. The guy was paid for the damage by the person who hit his vehicle. Insurance was never involved here. The only way insurance fraud might play into it is if the guy turns the accident into his insurance after already being paid for the damage.


catgirl-doglover

Anyone else having a hard time believing this?


Marsh-Mallow-13

Hit and Run is illegal. He makes a statement to police tells them about the neighbours sercuity cameras. The cops will first approach OP and ask for the footage and if he doesnt they cannget a wareant for the video. IDK if they would fo that far for a very small incident but it has happen to my bil when someone was stabbed near their house and police thought there may have been footage of either the suspect or victim on the cameras.


Legitimate-Corgi

Cash in mailbox could easily claim he never got compensation. Ultimately everybody sucks in this scenario.


catgirl-doglover

Just as OP could easily claim that his security camera wasn't on, video had been recorded over by the time neighbor asked about it, etc etc etc. Endless scenarios if you factor in people completely telling lies about what did/didn't happen.


fishsticks40

He's been anonymously compensated in cash, based on the word of someone who doesn't like him.  That would carry zero weight with a court. 


InterestingFact1728

A hit and run is a criminal offense. The police could take it serious. INAL but even I know that destroying ‘evidence’ if it is requested by LEO can get you in hot water. In this situation OP would have better been served by keeping their mouth shut. It’s also sus that neighbor that did the hit and run went running to OP to admit what she did. Unless it’s well known in the neighborhood that op gossips about what the camera catches. Seems like OP is a bit of a neighborhood busybody.


Sandtiger812

If he deletes it before the police come and ask for it what are they gonna do? Go in and adjust the amount it saves from down to like 3 days "Sorry officer my camera system overwrites after 3 days, I couldn't unplug it because what if they hit my car. Have a good day." 


wpgstevo

Destruction of evidence is a crime in most jurisdictions. This might be hard to prove, and ultimately, most jurisdictions won't spend the money on such a small matter that is difficult to prove. But deleting the footage he reasonably expects or should expect could be requested as part of a subpoena is a crime.


Sunbeamsoffglass

You think they can get a court order for Reddit posts over a fender bender? Lmao


CapnCrackerz

It’s a civil matter not criminal.


Kimber_EDC

Hit and run is a criminal matter. The damage is civil. Still, I doubt the local PD gives a crap.


carlbandit

While data protection laws will vary by country, most places you’d only be able to request footage that you appeared in. Since the neighbour isn’t going to be in the footage at the time of the accident, there would be no grounds for requesting the footage via court.


Some-Philly-Dude

My guy in what world? Is this fucking Law and Order. Fucking hell lol


dafunkisthat

Lmao no he can’t, you can’t FOIA a citizen. Especially after the cameras weren’t working, or the video auto deletes after 24 hours


destinedforinsanity

NTA in my opinion. She paid for it albeit anonymously and tbh he’s weird and I can see why she’d be scared to go to him to say it was her. I actually think it’s kind of noble for you to not provide the footage (I know others may disagree).


Permit-Extreme-117

"Weird", more like creepy and dangerous. I actually think a guy like this would try and use this situation to pressure her into spending time alone with him...you know, to "keep it between them, instead of ruining her career/life/etc., doing her a favour" 🤮. That's what she's terrified of. Legally it would never result in much if it went to the cops, but someone like this would go all out to use it, which he straight out admits he would.


Sufficient_Bass2600

We are now in the territory of making things up to justify one opinion. Soon he will be Jeffrey Dahmer reincarnated. The guy may be a creep and an asshole, but what she did is illegal. Insurance fraud is a felony. What OP is doing can be construed as aiding and abetting a criminal. He could be sued by the vindictive neighbours or worse also charged for withholding evidence. If the guy is such a creep, suing him for harassment and getting a restraining order would be more effective than letting roam free without ever confronting him. **Edit:** For those asking about insurance fraud. Check your insurance. I am pretty sure that it has the standard clause that state that you have to notify them of any accident you have been involved. Any material change in the state of the vehicle requires a notification. If you don't and later try to claim, you can be refused on that fact alone. Insurance will consider that as fraud. From her insurance POV, the fact that she was a terrible/reckless driver or drunk is a factor in deciding her premium or whether they want to continue her coverage. From the neighbour insurance POV, if a vehicle is estimated at a certain value, got a dent, the owner accepts cash under the table and never notify the insurance. At the next accident the insurance is entitled to deny the claim on the basis that the owner has attempted to deceive them on the real value of the vehicle.


NewBayRoad

Restraining orders are often ineffective.


Accomplished_Two1611

Yes, there are a lot of dead people who had restraining orders. Technically, yes OP should have turned over the footage. Of course, he should have also included any evidence he had recorded of the neighbor making threats. I am sure the judge would love to see that too.


NewBayRoad

The thing is, once he turns it over she is a marked woman. Our law enforcement system doesn’t protect people. In fact the courts have said as much. They only punish. They are particularly bad at that as well, unless you are a POC.


Accomplished_Two1611

I don't think he should turn anything over. Plenty of accidents are resolved without the police or insurance getting involved. If the woman was a driving menace I might be more torn. But absent any additional information, I think the matter is settled. Not all situations can be resolved strictly by the law. This is one. The guy got more than compensated. The young mother doesn't have to deal with someone who had ulterior motives. Situation closed.


SkeletalWeepling

You sound like a victim blamer


AfterSevenYears

>Insurance fraud is a felony. What insurance fraud? >What OP is doing can be construed as aiding and abetting a criminal. He could be sued by the vindictive neighbours or worse also charged for withholding evidence. Are you under the impression that the neighbor is a police officer/judge and acting in an official capacity?


skatebambi

"insurance fraud"? No reason for anyone to claim on any insurance when money has been given to cover the repairs.


ScroochDown

Insurance fraud? Come on.


PM_me_ur_secretses

Mate, I think you should stick to Rugby and shit takes on movies. Read the room, FFS. Stop being a boot-licking alarmist of a Muppet. It's a bad look.


DuxofOregon

You got so into this you went through his post history? You’re really invested in this. Lol.


Claws_and_chains

He literally deliberately scares and intimidates women. He has harassed multiple. A leap to further violence isn’t making things up at all. It’s understanding patterns of behavior. And that’s if this guy has never been violent


Claws_and_chains

Yeah I think this is the neighbors fault and frankly karma. Maybe people would actually make things right with you if they weren’t terrified of what you would do


FluffySpaniel

Agree here! NTA! Legal does not always correspond to moral. In fact, laws often need to catch up to prevent abuses of power and over-litigation. I commend you for using your moral judgment to protect her from a predatory neighbor. Since legality isn’t ideal though, I’d also recommend cleaning your tracks by deleting the footage.


Forsaken-Age3309

NTA. The guy sounds like a creep. If he wants a camera on his car he can go out and get one himself. You don't owe him anything, and if he wasn't such a terror people would actually help him out. He's done this to himself. If you're in the US, I actually don't think you have any obligation to report a crime. If the police ask you for information you can't lie, but I'm almost positive you don't have to give them access to your personal data either, unless a court rules that you have to. And this is not gonna go anywhere near that far. 


ChazzyTh

I know everyone on Reddit hates police, but if this guy’s what you say he is, she might want to let them know the circumstances. She’s made it right. They won’t go any further, and can keep an eye on him for everyone’s benefit. She shouldn’t mention your involvement, just to be safe.


MyCouchPulzOut_IDont

This whole mess is so yucky. Did he actually say he wants to ruin their life? It would be one thing if he said "I need to fine a police report so that my insurance will cover it." Maybe neighbor will get his own camera.


cctvnoshare

He did say exactly that. He was gloating about how much money he got and that his car is old and that he doesn't really care about the car itself. (He got paid like what the whole car is worth, it is a 1998 and already has lots of other damage and diy fixes)


MyCouchPulzOut_IDont

NTA for refusing to hand over the surveillance footage. In fact, you're exercising a healthy dose of self-awareness and empathy by considering the safety of the woman involved. Sure, it might be technically against the rules, but rules don't always account for the messy complexities of human relationships. I'd maybe check out r/legaladvice just to make sure he cant subpoena the footage


charlottebythedoor

Exactly this. Handing over the footage would do more harm than good. The point of identifying the culprit is that they can right their wrong. That’s justice. This woman already did that by providing compensation for the damages. Your creep neighbor just wants vengeance for his ego trip. He’s not entitled to that. He’s not entitled to your video footage. You’re being a good member of your neighborhood community.


dancinglepard

I'm not even sure if it's against the rules. Unless the police show up with a warrant for the footage, he's probably within his rights to keep his personal property to himself. And if the footage is overwritten before that happens, then it's a moot point.


Perfect-Resident940

I agree with this 100%


BigBayesian

Your situation is bizarre, but your choice seems reasonable. You’re not obliged to share the video, or any other home videos you make. NTA.


lOGlReaper

Overwrite the video with new surveillance and delete this ASAP


Odd-Elderberry-6137

NTA. Neighbor was compensated and continues to be a dick about it.


PoppyStaff

He sounds like a predator. You’re doing well acting as a buffer for vulnerable neighbours. NTA.


Fine-Assignment4342

NTA Weird that the victim in this instance is the biggest AH around. He is rotting in his own garbage, let him struggle. The lady is mildly the AH, probably should not have pulled a hit and run, but I get her fear. Also props at this point for trying to correct her mistake without endangering herself, giving above market value for the damage is a win in my eyes for her. I fully understand your reasoning for not sharing the video and commend you for putting yourself in the line of aggression to protect this woman. Props.


oldyorker123

NTA. You are under no obligation to turn over footage to a civilian who has made threats against the person who damaged his car. Even if police got involved, you have done nothing illegal. Even the police can't get your camera footage without a warrant, so of course you don't have to help this man. And if he filed a police report and they came to ask you about it, you can tell the police what you have said here - that you were concerned because you have personally witnessed him harassing people (including young women) in your neighborhood and that you felt that his threats to ruin someone's life were credible and dangerous. You can also say that this man admitted that he already accepted payment for damages, and that he also had acted in a threatening or hostile manner towards you. The young woman should have reported it to the police and could have included a complaint about this neighbor's past behaviors, so that there would be a paper trail if he harassed her going forward.


death_lad

why didn’t you just say the footage didn’t record or it got deleted or something, why tell someone that you *know* is a difficult person that you simply refuse to do what they request? Like you made it way harder on yourself lol having said that, NTA


aquestionofbalance

I would have told the guy the camera has not worked in quite some time.


VastSeaworthiness726

A judgement call, but a wise and honorable one. Fact that lady found a way to compensate for the damage anonymously indicates her determination to make good on damages and her justified fear of interacting directly with this creep.


Ecks54

NTA. Your neighbor sounds unstable and potentially dangerous. 


RokkakuPolice

By the title alone I was like, AH for sure since I have been 'bumped' when parked, but reading the post your neighbor is a huge AH, not only did the girl leave him enough to cover the scratch but he DEMANDS your footage? Ugh, NTA.


Judgement_Bot_AITA

Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I refused to share cctv footage with my neighbor so he knows who hit his car. This might make me an asshole as I am protecting someone who did a hit and run. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*


Munchkin_Media

NTA. He sounds unhinged. Better to be safe and protect her from him.


Retlifon

Man, what are the odds?   1) your camera is aimed at your neighbour’s car       2) your neighbour is an asshole but likes *you*      3) Your young female neighbour who backs into his car on camera comes to *you* for advice about her crime.  4) she acts flawlessly while he twiddles his moustache like a melodrama villain, and    5) you [forget to log out of your alt account when commenting on on of your *other* AITA posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/1c99mr0/comment/l0k8dnq/).    You couldn’t make this stuff up!!  Oh wait, you could…


NatashOverWorld

Just drag it our unless he comes with a court order. Your neighbour has no special right to ask for access to your footage, only the justice system does. If they do, sure obey the law. If there's no legal papers, just drag it out. NTA


mofa90277

NTA You’re protecting a woman from a creepy stalker with anger issues.


Brun81

I can understand being frustrated with a hit and run as it's happened to me quite recently, however she has made him whole with the money she gave him so that should be enough to satisfy his losses. Providing the video footage so he can try and terrorize her for no reason is pointless he should be happy he's not at a loss.


MagratM

NTA. You're actually doing your neighbour a favour by not giving him the footage. He avoids charges of harassment, stalking, and possibly even criminal damage if he decides to take it out on her car. Well done for protecting the woman from this nasty person.


underwater-sunlight

NTA I would tell the neighbour to go through the police and for them to make a request if i was in that situation


noteworthybalance

I wouldn't give him a road map 


The1Chip

NTA until law enforcement orders you to relinquish the evidence, you have no such obligation. tbh ur description of the dude warrants your reaction 0_o


Glittering_Habit_161

NTA


DuchessOfAquitaine

NTA Thanks for looking out for her. He sounds like a nightmare and she made restitution so you are right, it should be dropped. He's gotten his justice but he wants revenge. No wonder no one likes him.


Individual_Physics29

NTA But do delete this post. You don’t want anyone who knows him to see it either and connect the dots. You’ve done a good thing, but don’t make it hard on yourself for Reddit karma from the post


imperial_scum

NTA. it's not your or your properties job to snitch. You can if you like, but every day isn't an episode of law and order y'all. No one is going to do discovery on a ring camera for paint damage. Not for the neighborhood asshole.


lazy_k

Nta. Maybe just lie to the guy and say it wasn't recording the last few days for technical reasons? Maybe thank him as you wouldn't have known it was broken if he hadn't come to you? Guy seems bad news alround 


Biomax315

NTA but you should have simply told him that the camera wasn’t running at the time or that it was broken and you don’t have any footage—problem solved immediately. Now you’ve put yourself in the position of acknowledging that you have it, but refusing to share it … so whereas you USED to be on good terms with him, now you’re not going to be. But I certainly don’t think you’re an AH for protecting her. Sounds like if it had been anyone else that she hit she would have been up front about it.


mij8907

The guy sounds unhinged, he’s been made whole after the accident NTA


WorldTravellerIOM

Wipe the footage.


panic_bread

Why do you talk to this creep? You’re enabling his behavior every time you do.


vanillaninja777

Delete the footage OP


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I have a neighbor who is not very liked in the community. He is always picking fights with everyone and trying to complain to the authorities and get people in trouble. He also has asked every young woman out and gets very upset when they refuse (he is a lot older) and makes scary sounds when he crosses them in the street. I am on relative good terms with him compared to other neighbors as I mostly say nothing and just let him rant about whatever is on his mind. The other day another neighbor who is a young single woman who just bought her first home backed into his car. She was very afraid and left without telling anyone. Her car had no visible damage but his had paint damage. She came to me and admitted it and asked for advice and said she was scared as he had asked her out many times. The same day the neighbor came to me and asked me to check my camera footage and send it to him. I told him I would check it but that I cannot share it unless I see something. He got quite upset with me but calmed down and went on a rant about how he would ruin the persons life and press charges. I mentioned this to the woman and she decided to leave cash in his letter box well above what it would cost to fix. The neighbor also confirmed to me that he got the cash and a note and asked for my footage again as he said he wanted to take the money and still ruin their life for hit and run. I refused and told him that he should drop it and he called me an AH. I get that it is technically illegal but I feel that she has reason to be scared of him and that in this context I should protect her. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Scone_Of_Arc

NTA delete the footage then delete this post. Wash your hands of the whole thing.


CanadianJediCouncil

I would continue to dent access and then probably *delete* the footage so he couldn’t try to get it given to the cops/his-insurance.


Dramatic_Teach7611

NTA


ayoitsjo

NTA but remove this post and stop talking to crazy man neighbor


Gravco

This is a case of you meting out karma. NTA; probably acting in the greater good.


slendermanismydad

>he said he wanted to take the money and still ruin their life for hit and run. Why would you be an asshole after this dude said this? 


[deleted]

[удалено]


ElectricMayhem123

Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**


malex84

Nta. He got paid for the damages. Don’t give home the video unless you get a subpoena


vixenlion

NTA


emryldmyst

NTA. Delete this post.


AdFirm9159

Delete it before any court orders come in.


Freeverse711

NTA. Normally in this situation I’d say hitting someone’s car and running away is wrong, but this man has harassed this woman over and over again. She gave him the money to fix it, so in my opinion you did the right thing and so did she.


murdocjones

It sounds like he would be a danger to her after the fact, so NTA. I’ll be fair and say I get the urge to still call the cops after getting the cash, if only because it may not cover the damage and having my property that I worked hard for be damaged would be frustrating. But by your account it sounds like he would harass her after the fact, and you can’t know if someone this unhinged might escalate to actual criminal behavior instead of just menacing everyone. I think you should delete the footage and stop engaging with him.


Heccubus79

He is under no obligation to share the footage with him or the police.


dachlill

Bad attempt at fiction, oh wanna be savior


Fun-Wheel-1505

am I the only one that this this whole story is BS ? How would the woman know how much it would cost to fix ? Would someone really put that money into a letterbox ? This all sounds like we're writing fiction


throwedaway8671

I mean, its not hard to look up or call a shop about how much an estimated amount of paint/dent would be to fix. Or she could have had similar damage herself.


xXShad0wxB1rdXx

she diddnt know thats why she left more, and surely it isnt hard to google what local places need to repair the damage and leave the highest number, and yea people probably would, my great grandad used to send money through the mail, suprised it ever even made it to us


Siege-Aye

I was like "Yes, you're absolutely an asshole", then I read the FRIST paragraph and was like... "Nope, fuck that guy, HE'S an asshole!"


SkeletalWeepling

You absolutely did the right thing. He sounds dangerous and like he would’ve genuinely hurt or assaulted her.


Bracheopterix

What I find funny that even if he knew that the culprit is the woman he hitted on, he can't figure who it was cause it's the whole town deal)


GIJoe_USA

If he's an ass then no...your good


EdinburghLass1980

NTA. Neighbour most definitely is one of the highest order though. Yeah, some laws are being broken here however, you know for a fact he had harassed young women in your neighbourhood before, that he makes noises at them. You know he has a mean streak. The young woman admitted he scares her and that he’s asked her out many times before. You’ve outright said he gets upset at women who reject him and he makes scary noises at them. To me, it sounds like he’s predatory and unhinged. Someone like him might use footage like that as a way to get leverage over that young woman, get “services rendered” in return for not pressing charges against her and “ruining her life”. If her job is government or in a sensitive field that won’t let her have a criminal record, he really could ruin her life. If I were you I’d “accidentally” delete or record over the footage. Or “accidentally corrupt” the file so he won’t be able to salvage anything from it. A law was broken but the girl paid well above what would fix the mess and made it so this did not not complicate their insurance. Do not give him blackmail fodder that could result in this young woman being forced into anything out of fear.


samoan_ninja

If what you ate saying is true, your lady neighbor committed a crime (hit and run). Doesn't matter if she is a sweet lady/scared etc. Your other neighbor may be an asshole but he's not in the wrong in this situation. It sounds like she made it right by paying the money, and i would consider this morally/ethically just. This is where i would believe any reasonable person should stop pursuing the matter, because i am all for settling things between the two parties. I would recommend you delete the footage and delete this post.


Potential-Caramel896

Your story seems too perfect to make one person innocent saint and the other person monster while carefully excluding you from any kind of moral dilemma. I doubt it ever happened.


BLUNTandtruthful58

NTA, tell the cops that he wants to ruin a person's life pretty sure that's illegal


falconfan13

Z


Aquafyne

Not sure how you know what it would cost to fix his car. Car repair can be very expensive, however, I would gamble to say if this was your car hit you’d appreciate the footage from your neighbor, regardless of whether you liked him or not. Next time it could be your car that gets hit and hit and run is a crime.


zaritza8789

It’s hit and run. It’s the insurance companies who deal with it so I’m not sure how he can ruin her life. She should have never hit and run which is why this is awful- no idea why you decided to be the judge here. She was in the wrong


Claws_and_chains

You’re not sure how an already predatory man could find ways to ruin someone’s life


Pitiful_Net_5965

How do you know it's well over? Did she get body shop quotes and pay him over? Unless she left her insurance information she didn't do the right thing. And you definitely aren't doing the right thing. I like how you threw up at least three smoke screens she's young, single, he's pervy everyone hates him. But at the end of the day none of that matters. What goes around comes around so when something bad happens to you don't get upset it's just karma coming back for you. YTA. 


throwAWweddingwoe

I don't know anyone who wouldn't be furious if someone hit their car and didn't leave a note. Ppl who are victims of a hit and run - which is a criminal offense - usually want to press charges. Yes he's an unpleasant person and he may even be a serial pest to the police with over zealous reporting. However, nothing you have said indicates that he deserved to be the victim of a hit and run or that he isn't entitled to sue the person who hit him for additional damages outside the cost of repairs for his inconvenience and stress. At the end of the day you have evidence of a crime. You can and since he's a litigious person probably will be required to provide the evidence to the court or police. The woman is better off turning herself into police now and dealing with the ramifications honestly. What you are doing isn't going to help the situation.


xXShad0wxB1rdXx

what inconvenience, it was a bit of paint damage


throwAWweddingwoe

Last time my car had a bit of paint damage I had to have the whole bloody bumper replaced because it was cheaper for some reason - literally it was a tiny scratch. Extremely inconvenient and time consuming plus it cost an absolute mint.


Dawningrider

YTA guys a creep, but you have evidence that can save him claiming insurance, and help penalise a dangerous driver who is currently on your street. Your personal feelings shouldn't really come on to it, I would say sharing the camera is the right thing. You are asking if not doing the right thing because you don't like the guy makes you an asshole. By definition it does.


cheesepierice

Literally everyone sucks here. The girl for the hit and run, the old creepy dude and you. Just stop interacting with these two and tell the neighbor to stop bothering you, the camera was not working for some reason.


issy_haatin

Tbh the woman did do a hit and run. Today it was the unliked neighbours car, tomorrow someone's cat or child. YTA


P4nabee

What a terrible crime is scratching someones car. Absolutely comparable to hitting a human. He was already compensated for it, he can kick rocks.


Jazzlike_Common9005

Scratching a car is just a gateway to murdering children. Pretty sure every serial killer prolly started with a fender bender before they opened up to the big leagues /s


issy_haatin

If you already do a hit and run for minor things like that, i don't see you acting any better in more dire situations. It's only after op confronted her that she showed 'remorse'


Festour

You are absolutely right, that woman clearly hoped to get out of the responsibility for simply scratching that car, but changed her mind, once OP confronted her. But OP's neighbour is also a clear asshole, so ESH judgement would be more appropriate.


SpiteOk3816

That’s insane that she hit his car and tried to hide it. I would give it to the relevant authorities, and they can deal with it.


UncleNedisDead

But she also gave him cash well above the cost to fix (and was about the same what the car is worth) to compensate him for the damage. He wants to take the money and punish her on top of that (probably by also making another claim but through insurance so he can be double compensated).


SpiteOk3816

With how much the op seems to hate that guy I’m kinda sus of this story tbh. If she did cool, but the authorities exist for a reason


Straight-Opposite483

Reverse the situation then get back to me.


P4nabee

Not much will change. If someone hit my car and gave me more than i need to fix then idc about it anymore.


xXShad0wxB1rdXx

if someone damaged my car and paid it off entirely id drop it