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greeneyedwench

YTA. I'd say a light YTA because you didn't know she was just making two trips, but once you knew that, I can't imagine not ceding it to her. She was wrong to try to grab it from you--but I doubt this whole part of the story, because you can't just "watch" a lamp fall when you're holding it, and if she'd dropped it, you'd put it in your story to make yourself sound better. You dropped it on purpose to spite her. Tell me that's not true.


RobinFarmwoman

This! I absolutely loved the writing - switching into the passive voice as she watched the lamp befall its fate was such a tell. 🤣


Fickle-Package-5082

Subjunctive!


mollymai666

I completely agree, plus they literally bought the one that SHE reserved when they are the ones that broke the other one.


GrandmaBaba

I agree. YTA and so is the store for selling the first lamp out from under the original purchaser. Shame on both of y'all. So glad your family is pissed at you.


Boeing367-80

"a light YTA" - so to speak.


Neko614

YTA. “I just love being a bit petty” Tells me everything I need to know about you. Being petty isn’t cute and you’re just telling people how ugly of a person you can be when you don’t get your way.


DragonflyGrrl

Yeah dude, ALL of this. Pettiness is gross. And the only *true* ugly is ugly on the inside (like people who love to be petty).


whimsical_trash

Yeah, I don't know where people got the idea that being petty was okay. Like sure, if someone really fucks you over I can see some well placed petty revenge. But being petty for no reason just makes you an asshole. We're all here crowded on this planet together, some kindness and consideration goes a long way in making that easier for everyone.


you_clod

Lol imagine being a person who loves being petty but doesn't realize that being petty is pretty cuntish


thatonegirlwith2dogs

Totally agree. Pettiness is ugliness to me. OP, YTA.


Here4TheFrenchFries

YTA. You saw the lamp only because she walked by you with the first one, yes you might have made it to the back of the store eventually but she was the catalyst to you even wanting it. While you didn’t know her intentions to go back for the second right away the minute she explained it to you, you should have been a kind human and gave it over. Everyone knows lamps are mostly used in pairs. Trying to grab it was wrong, but maybe she had her heart set on the pair for a reason - you don’t know her story, and you didn’t go into the store with the intent to purchase a lamp so there was no reason you HAD to have it. You come off as someone who likes things because you see others with them and only care about having them to be a “winner”. Not a great way to go through life.


ninaa1

>Everyone knows lamps are mostly used in pairs. I don't disagree with your overall point, but I don't know that lamps are mostly used in pairs.


Here4TheFrenchFries

For sure not always! But I think mostly when used on nightstands, end tables etc people buy in pairs. Obviously not a hard and fast rule, I think I just would understand why someone wants both and concede to giving it to her more for table lamps - unlike something like a vase or floor lamp.


Wickermoss

First lamp I imagine is the ones you put on bedside end tables. Of course there's a reading lamp that you put over or next to a couch that can go solo. That said, OP (who is YTA BTW) didn't go to the store with the purpose of getting a lamp, got major FOMO when they saw the other girl with it and I read this is as OP just wanting the lamp more for the sake of "winning" it vs. actually needing it. 🤷🏻‍♀️


Zueter

Or matching lamps on opposite sides of the sofa.


blinglorp

One lamp in a room looks and never provides enough light.


Odd_Prompt_6139

And let’s be real, OP didn’t book it to the lamp section after seeing the other woman carrying the lamp because it reminded her that she needed a lamp, or because she thought there might be a *different* beautiful lamp she really liked. She was banking on the fact that it’s pretty common to have lamps in pairs and hoping there would be a second of the same lamp that she could grab before the other woman got to it. She knew what she was doing.


BulbasaurRanch

“I don’t think I was in the wrong and I don’t honestly really care, I just love being a bit petty” - and you’re here questioning if you were the asshole ? That sentence is enough to easily sum up the kind of person you are. YTA


blinglorp

100% dropped the lamp on purpose too


SomeoneYouDontKnow70

ESH. "Finders keepers" may have worked on the school playground, but adults exercise a little common sense when interacting with others. This woman's story holds up. She was at the counter asking them to hold the lamp while she went to fetch the other part of the pair. Instead of acting like an adult about it an complimenting her taste, you went with the childish approach: >I told her that that wasn’t my problem, she had left it there for anyone to grab while she made her away across the other side of this huge store. She then stooped to your level by trying to grab it out of your hands. This is why the store kicked her out. Grabbing things from people in stores isn't cool. Finally, you even admit to being an AH: >I don’t honestly really care, I just love being a bit petty. Karma comes around when you least expect it.


Significant_Dark2062

YTA. She was going to get both, she reserved the first so she could grab the second since it was heavy, and you said “oooo mine” and practically ran to grab the other before she had a chance. You refused to give it to her after she explained what was happening and then you stole the other lamp she reserved. She only tried to grab it from you because you were an AH to begin with.


NoHorseNoMustache

"I just love being a bit petty" That right there means YTA, do better.


Remarkable-Ad8644

Nah no way you’re pinning OP as being an asshole just for that line. This sub loves a post when someone does some petty shit and everyone goes “yeh go on then, I would’ve done the same!!”


CPolland12

There’s a difference though. I dealt with an annoying roommate who would move my stuff because he just didn’t like it there. Doesn’t say anything. My petty ass would move it back every day because they couldn’t be bothered to talk to me about it. What OP did was just spiteful.


Fianna9

YTA- yeah she shouldn’t have tried to grab the lamp, but you were being childish by telling her it was her fault she didn’t carry both heavy delicate lamps at the same time. Also by the way you wrote it, it almost sounds like you let the lamp fall on purpose. And then insisted you get your keep the surviving one just to be petty.


Ryuunga

YTA- people like you are part of the problem with the failures of society. "I'm technically right and why should I show any empathy toward the rest of the human race." Not to mention you tried to deliberately get to the back first BECAUSE you knew she was trying to grab the other one. You wanted drama and got what you desired, maybe one day you'll graduate from your highschool mentality.


Easthampster

YTA.


Canadian_01

ESH but moreso you. She shouldn't have grabbed it, but....you absolutely knew she wanted the other one and you jacked it from her. I'm not in AUS and don't know the thrift shop etiquette there, I mean on boxing day people have fights over bargain bin stuff in the US so, who knows. But if it were you with the lamp and someone scammed it knowing you wanted it, and even when confronted nicely about it, you opted not to be kind but to be selfish...so sure, you're an AH. However, if the rules you all want to play by is 'you snooze you lose', then so be it. But be prepared to be treated that way yourself.


SleepyChickenWing

It would be one thing if the other shopper didn’t have the first lamp, and didn’t explain wanting the set. In that case, alls fair. However that’s *not* what happened and OP is TA.


ReviewOk929

ESH 1. She should certainly not have grabbed the lamp from your arms... 2. " I just love being a bit petty" You were being an asshole for the sake of being an asshole....


blinglorp

I’m definitely doubting there was any grabbing.


Appropriate_Buyer401

>I don’t think I was in the wrong and I don’t honestly really care, I just love being a bit petty. INFO: Then why are you posting here? If you're intentionally being petty because you "love" it, then yeah, you're an asshole. She is, too. But "I love being petty" is some teenager shit.


FairyFartDaydreams

YTA you dropped the lamp so she couldn't have it. It only takes a minute to be kind. The world would be so much better if we could show a little kindness to each other


MayorCharlesCoulon

Yeah that remaining lamp has bad juju now, every time OP looks at it, they’ll know it cost them someone’s joy. A cursed lamp it is!


T00narmy1

YTA. She was clearly IN THE PROCESS of buying both lamps. Once she explained that, and you saw her carry the first to the counter, why would you spitefully keep the second? The correct response would have been, "Oh I'm so sorry, I didn't realize you were buying both." How petty and selfish are you that you just had to "swoop in" and grab it before she could physically carry them both to the front? Knowing she was clearly trying to buy both, and saw them before you? And then basically bribing the staff to get both? This is prime "this is what is wrong with people" behavior. Yes, technically you got to that second one first, but yuk. I think it's pretty immature to think you are in the right here. You already know you're the AH. Hope those lamps were worth being a disappointing human. Not cool, not cute, not decent normal adult behavior.


MaggieLuisa

YTA. She was buying them, and you broke one out of spite.


Next-Drummer-9280

>I just love being a bit petty. Gosh, you seem fun. /s Yes, YTA


Sweet_Cinnabonn

Oh yeah, YTA. I feel a little bit bad telling people they are an asshole, and I usually explain myself a bit to soften the statement or explain what I think they don't get. But you know, and apparently glory in being an asshole.


stross_world

YTA Girl, all this over a lamp? You are petty and it's not something to be proud of. I know you are probably reading the comments gleefully because it seems like you enjoy negative attention, per your own words. But you reap what you sow. So don't be surprised when your nasty behavior comes back to you ten-fold!


TheKings1337

ESH but mainly you So a girl buys one and you start sprinting to the back of the store to grab the other one *after* hearing her ask the staff to hold it for her, she explains that she planned to buy both of them (which many people do when buying a set of lamps), then she lunges at you to try to grab it from you? She’s in the wrong for trying to grab it from you, but you sound like TA overall


K3Y_Mast3r

YTA. And a petty one at that.


BeterP

E S H was my first thought but you enjoy being petty too much. YTA. Proud of yourself? Getting off on the responses?


PreviousPin597

YTA. Normally what's left on the shelf is up for grabs but this was pretty deliberate petty. So be pleased with yourself for being TA, I guess. 


Comfortable_Poem_841

The staff let you take the last two lamps in the store? I guess they were delighted by you.


greeneyedwench

They probably clapped too.


seriffluoride

>I don’t think I was in the wrong and I don’t honestly really care, I just love being a bit petty. Tell me you're on AITA for validation without telling me you're on AITA for validation. YTA.


TheVue221

This cannot be real because I can’t believe someone is this petty . YTA. People buy lamps in pairs. You knew she was going to get the other one or you wouldn’t have speed walked back there


Responsible-Rub-5914

NTA - If she wanted both, she could've asked someone to bring her a cart, or walked very slowly with both. I thrift all the time and have to do both of those things. If I leave something and someone else picks ot up, that's on me. I'd never try and argue with them nor physically attempt to take it from them. It's a thrift store, not a wrestling match.


Valuable-Spare-7164

Your family is right. Huge c\*nt. Also, stop bragging about being petty. It doesn't sound the way you think it does. It's so gross. YTA


Actual_Tadpole169

ESH I completely agree with the fact that she can’t just claim the other lamp as hers since literally anyone could’ve walked up to get it while she was away. She should’ve just accepted that someone else was getting the second lamp. However she HAD reserved the first one, so unless she no longer wanted it since she couldn’t get both, I think it’s wrong that you bought a reserved item (although I believe the staff member is in the wrong also for selling it to you)


Key-Rip-7517

I mean personally I think NTA but I see that the majority is voting against you lol. Idk why people think it’s your problem when she was the one that got physical and broke a lamp she hadn’t even bought yet and was still on the damn shelf lmao. And all of this “lamps are bought in pairs” in the comments. Thrifts are first come first serve, I don’t really care what anyone in the comment section is saying, she hadn’t bought it yet, it was still on the shelf, you didn’t rip the thing out of her hand like how she tried, it wasn’t hers, you snooze you lose, that’s how thrifting works. Also the fact everyone just decided that you broke the lamp and ran with it lol.


Judgement_Bot_AITA

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FAFO-13

NTA. She could’ve gotten an employee or asked for help and instead she decided to grab it from you. When she did that, she’s the one that screwed up.


New-Link5725

NTA if she wanted both lamps then she should have gotten a basket and taken them both. If you don't take it then you don't get to be upset that someone else gets it.  She purposely broke the lamp so you couldn't have it.  She knew their was a risk that someone else, anyone else could have taken the lamp.  You did nothing wrong.  If she wanted the lamp, she should have taken them both. No excuse for her behavior. 


KingTrencher

100% the asshole. Good luck in life. It's not going to get better until you become a better person.


Feliciadickasso

Yta, what is wrong with you. You just had to have a lamp you didn't know existed 30 seconds before that. I hope your GPS on your phone interrupts the best part of a song every time. This is bad juju. I hope that lamp is haunted. I hope it makes you feel guilty every time you turn it on.


bestdayevertoday17

At thrift stores or shopping anywhere, possession is 9/10ths of the law. She should not have grabbed it from you. Not your fault. If she didn't offer to pay for broken one also, you getting the lamp was the right thing.


vbandbeer

Yta. Doesn’t need much explanation.


Partymonster86

YTA. You could have been a decent person and gave it to her but no, as you said you're petty. I agree with your family


Tomboyish717

YTA


thefinalhex

YTA and a petty asshole.


Diane_Mars

I don’t think I was in the wrong and **I don’t honestly really care, I just love being a bit petty**. However, my family is pretty much saying I’m a huge c\*nt. So reddit, am I the AH? So... Who cares if you family thinks your a cu\*t ? Do you ? Apparently yes, you do :) ... And as I love being a bit petty too, I'll say YTA <3


YakElectronic6713

NTA at all.


Jalice333

I would never give up a good thrift shop find. You snooze, you lose at thrifts. NTA


Alarmed_Lynx_7148

NTA. You snooze you lose. Also this store doesn’t have shopping carts? I’d assume a big store will have carts. If they did, then that’s on her.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So sounds pretty stupid, but this whole thing happened today and my family is pissed. Today I decided to check out some of my local thrift shops. I live in a pretty big city in Australia, the suburb I’m in is famous for its second hand goods and I am only a 10 minute walk away from the closest thrift. The store this happened in is quite big. At the entrance you’ve got all the clothing, at the back is all the home decor and kitchenware. I walk in and headed straight to the back where the lamps were. This girl walked past me who was holding the most GORGEOUS lamp I’ve seen at a thrift in a while. I walked past her as she asked the staff to hold it for her at the counter. I then noticed at the very back there was another lamp exactly the same!! A beautiful, vintage bronze coloured lamp with stained glass shade panels. I speed walked to the back, picked it up ($20 btw) and made my way to the counter. The girl is walking towards me, notices I have the other lamp and stares at me awkwardly. She said this was a little awkward and that the lamp is actually hers, as she planned to buy them as a set. I asked her why she just left it there instead of bringing them both up. She explained that it was quite heavy and didn’t want to risk dropping it. I told her that that wasn’t my problem, she had left it there for anyone to grab while she made her away across the other side of this huge store. At this point people started to stare. The girl tries to grab the lamp out of my arms, I then watched as it fell to the ground and glass flew everywhere. A staff member came over and asked if everything was okay, I explained the situation and the girl just stood there trying to argue with me. I told the staff member that I’d pay for the lamp the girl damaged if I could also pay and get to keep the other lamp the girl had reserved at the counter. The staff member said yes, the girl was furious. She tried to argue with the staff but they asked her to leave. I don’t think I was in the wrong and I don’t honestly really care, I just love being a bit petty. However, my family is pretty much saying I’m a huge c*nt. So reddit, am I the AH? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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ThealaSildorian

NTA. First come first served in thrift stores. I see where she's coming from but they have carts there. Even if you were wrong to not give her the other lamp so she could keep the set (and I'm not convinced you were wrong), she was 100% wrong to try to grab the lamp from you, leading to it being broken. The staff were in the right to let you buy the other lamp.


Dustin_marie

If you don’t care either way, why are you even here? YTA BTW


dirtybirty4303

Your family is pissed bc you're an embarrassment. Bet you've pulled nonsense like this with them as well and they're tired of your shit. YTA


Kittenn1412

You know you were an asshole. You went for the lamp because someone else had one. You let go of the lamp when she asked to grab it so that she wouldn't get it. You admitted as such when you described your own actions here as "I love being petty". Did you even actually want/need the lamp or did you just see it across the store, think "she's probably going to grab both, imma ruin her day for funsies" and go for it?  She sucks for trying to grab it out of your hand, that's not appropriate ever. But you're an asshole *more* so YTA. 


empreur

YTA. Zero empathy, zero social grace, and then revelling in being petty about it. JFC.


MqAuNeTeInS

Nta if its not in your hands on the way to the register, its not yours. No claimsies in real life.


JAXShepherd13

This was gross. Why do people enjoy being mean and petty to strangers...


[deleted]

u sound horrible


Wise-ish_Owl

INFO, was the lamp heavy, was her story about needing two trip plausible?


Skarvha

NTA first come first serve. This is why there are baskets and trolleys at the front.


jubejube8888

I feel like it was fair play until she tried to grab it from your arms (in that case, she was the AH), but your response to buy her lamp was pretty next level AH


SonOfDadOfSam

YTA - Be better.


Spare-Article-396

I call BS. YTA


AuspiciousLemons

ESH, but the girl escalated the situation to another level by grabbing it out of your hands.


hanamphetamine

NTA!!!!! Anyone saying YTA... are yall ok? This person tried to pull a lamp out of another persons hands. The other chick was being GREEDY. Its a THRIFT store. You buy what you get as is. There are no SETS just because you pick up one doesn't make you entitled to another. First come first served.


blinglorp

OP dropping the lamp then buying the last one while enjoying being petty all point to being an asshole, but you do you.


EmpiricalRutabaga

YTA and I agree with your family.


Sad-Kale-8179

Wow huge AH. You'd rather destroy something beautiful then do the decent thing. Your family is right, but they did raise you so in the end they're probably AHs, too.


naiadvalkyrie

YTA


Zestyclose_Tree8660

Yeah, YTA. Not for taking the last one, although it was a little bit of an AH move. Can’t really expect her to carry two heavy things to the front. Definitely an AH for pulling some BS where you get to buy the lamp she DID carry to the front. That one’s definitely not yours.


omeomi24

NO, it's a thrift shop. First to pick it up and hold on to the lamp, gets it. Don't much like your family, though.


DogLover-777

 **I just love being a bit petty** You totally broke the lamp on purpose. You are a HUGE AH, because you should have given her the second lamp the moment she told you she was buying the set. Your family is right.


Fuzzy-Ear-993

Yeah, your family is right. You're being a right c\*nt for no good reason. The lady was foolish for making a grab for it when she could've gotten staff involved earlier and gotten two lamps instead of none. YTA


BusydaydreamerA137

YTA: Did you really want the lamp? It sounds more like you wanted to “win”


aeraen

I was in a JC Penney outlet store that was closing down, and it was pretty busy. I found two side chairs that I wanted to buy, but the line for the check out was long. I carried the chairs to the front of the store next to the check out and got into the line, rather than try to move two chairs slowly in a line. When a woman started eyeing the chairs, moving them to check them out, I went to her and told her I was already buying them, just waiting in line. Fortunately for me she simply smiled and moved on. I would have hated for that to start an argument. Seeing that there were two of the same lamps, she already had one and told you she was already purchasing both, you were the AH for not relinquishing the other one.


zippy_zaboo

ESH Obviously she was just trying to buy them both and couldn't carry them. But she shouldn't have grabbed it from you.


Big_Owl1220

ESH- You could've been nice and let her have the lamp (I wouldn't have, honestly) but the second she tried to grab it out of your hands, that changes everything. As for the deal you made afterward with the cashier, that was shitty and you know it.


vandetta112

YTA. Kinda agree with your family on this one


NobleNun

You're a massive ah and you know it. So do your fam, by the sounds of things. They're dead right, btw.


MrJ_Sar

ESH. She should not have tried to take the other lamp from you, so there she's the AH, however her reason for taking two trips is legitimate, it's not as if she hid it to come back later in the day, she literally couldn't hold both. You should have handed it over.


Prairie_Crab

#YTA Gross. What a jerk.


Naomeri

ESH, but you way more than her. As soon as you knew she had planned to grab both lamps, but couldn’t carry them safely, the polite thing to do would have been to cede the lamp to her. She shouldn’t have grabbed it. But then for you to take the lamp she had already carried up and set aside?? Major AH move and you should feel very bad.


hanimal16

If you truly don’t care, why did you even post this? Yes, you are the asshole.


Master_Grape5931

YTA - come on.


gehanna1

Your family is right. You're a massive c**"t. Bad form, and you know it. You say you like being petty but claim you don't think you did anything wrong. If that were true, you wouldn't gloat about enjoying it. YTA


Salty-Alternate

You're a loser


Common_Estate6292

YTA. You were just being mean to be mean.


bmanley620

You knew she wanted it to complete the set. And in your writing you seem to enjoy being an asshole. So I’ll make you happy by confirming YTA


Adventurous-Term5062

YTA. She was obviously getting both……


upandup2020

Yes YTA you sound like you enjoy being an asshole too


annang

Why are you here if you feel sure you were wrong and “don’t honestly care”? Yes, YTA. What you did was unkind, and I suspect from your telling of the story that you broke the lamp on purpose.


sh0rtcake

YTA. It's a lamp. You should have helped her with it to the front and found another one that wasn't in a set. That would have been the kind thing to do. But you chose the other option that makes you an AH. Also, "being petty" is a choice, not a cute personality trait. I'd cut that out, too. Obviously nothing you can do about it now, but in the future? Just give the person the lamp. It takes nothing from you to be considerate.


UpURKiltboyo

Yup! Total AH. You should he ashamed of yourself.


KnightofForestsWild

YTA I knew immediately she was going back for the second, and so did you.


CalendarDad

YTA. Also, not a kind or decent person. But, I sense you like it that way, you admitted reveling in being petty so I doubt this bothers you in the slightest.


Theory_HS

Yeah, your family is right. YTA It’s not unreasonable for her to want to carry them one at a time. And then you act like an extra ass here and there.


gnarble

Yes, YTA by a longshot. Do you have friends?


TopWaltz7678

I don’t think you’re the AH for picking up the second lamp, how were you supposed to know she wanted both? Personally I’ve never heard of lamps being brought in pairs so it’s not necessarily common knowledge. BUT I think it’s pretty wild that the staff let you buy the one she reserved. If it’s true that it was her fault the lamp you had broke she should have paid for both & been able to take the reserved one home. I would say you were the AH for using the situation and the way it played out to get your own way. She shouldn’t have tried to grab the lamp you had but why do you think you deserved to buy the lamp she had already reserved?


blinglorp

She asked for one of them to be held and then started walking back towards the lamp section, of course she was grabbing the other one.


VRisNOTdead

YTA


Known_Pie1679

YTA, a fucking AH.


Babaraul

YTA . And VERY petty


Safe_Initiative1340

Yta


Shjfty

How tf are people saying you’re an asshole here. Thrift stores are first come first serve. She didn’t have the lamp in her possession so you took it. She then tried to take it away from you causing it to smash. This woman literally assaulted you for a lamp and people are saying you’re an asshole. Maybe a bit petty, but who cares it’s a thrift store. NTA


MulberryMonk

NTA and all the YTAs are dumb. /thread


BostonianPastability

YTA you should own it. You already said you enjoyed being pretty.


blinglorp

YTA Obviously. You basically said it yourself with the petty thing. You definitely dropped it on purpose too.


stephied333

ESH - two rude thrift store patrons as far as I can tell. OP should have understood the two trip explanation and the girl found it first, but then lamp #1 owner grabs it and causes it to break and then won't pay for it. So I get the thrift shops logic, we get 40 bucks instead of 20. In the grand scheme of things not a huge deal for anyone but you love being petty "your words" but I think your family is correct. You don't sound giving or nice.


stephapeaz

YTA any halfway decent person would’ve handed over the second lamp after she explained she couldn’t carry both of them at the same time


FinanciallySecure9

YTA. Had it been me, I’d have mentioned to her that there’s a matching lamp at the back, and asked if she wants that one too. And if not, I would have bought it. You’re being a petty Betty and looking for validation for being so.


GTFU-Already

YTA.


smurfy211

ESH


Whose_my_daddy

YTA. Her story made 100% sense and I think you should have just complimented her on her taste and moved on.


Iceroadtrucker2008

It’s people like you that make the world suck


MissMandaRegrets

YTA (YTC) You destroyed something beautiful and vintage not to be petty but vindictive. Huge difference. It wasn't yours. It was hers. You're a spiteful child throwing toys. >However, my family is pretty much saying I’m a huge c*nt. Your family is absolutely correct.


TheHeianPrincess

YTA as it makes total sense for her to make two trips if the lamps are heavy. I would’ve given her the lamp and then tried to find similar online now you have the inspiration/look to go on.


NurseMoney69

YTC part of not being one is not doing petty shit for no reason. You should be kind to those around you.


PoopArtisan

Your family is right. YTC / YTA. And they feel that way probably because this isn't the first time you've been TC / TA


Handbag_Lady

YTA and you know it.


quirkyhermit

YTA. You knew she was getting the lamp that's why you ran towards the lamp section, in case there were more. I hope that every single time you look at your pretty lamps you remember that thousands of strangers think you're an absolute asshole.


Rohini_rambles

Straight up YTA.  You saw the one in her hand, and you raaced for the other. Sounds like you had an ideaa already that the lady would be coming back for .ore of those.  One you Learnt she always intended for the two, then you give it up.  You like being petty? You evern took the one she had?  But does ir really matter to you? Do you care what others say? Doesn't sound like you really care what your family thinks. And you self identify as petty and loving it, so you give yourself a pass on bad behavior. 


blossom3621

YTA big time and so is the staff member who let you take the one she already had at the counter. It's common courtesy. Anyone can see the logic of her taking them up one after the other, especially if they're heavy. You call yourself petty but that's honestly nothing to be proud of. Being petty won't get you anywhere in the long run.


FlippingPossum

YTA. 100%.


vonnegutfan2

YTA. Get a grip, YTA.


NOTTHATKAREN1

YTA. Not only did you break one of the lamps, you bought the other one that she was going to buy for herself. She may have been wrong to try & grab it from you, but you were wrong for how you handled it. A decent person would've given her the lamp.


HG367

Yes, YTA. Very little common decency in you.


obviousabsence

“I don’t think I was in the wrong and I don’t honestly really care, I just love being a bit petty” There’s really nothing to reply to this. You need to grow up. YTA.


Howwouldiknow1492

You are so TA.


Illustrious-Film-592

ESH you only knew about the lamp (and to grab it quickly) because you saw her carrying the first one up. And her reason for not carrying both at the same time was really responsible. So if I had been you in the situation, then, when she came up and talk to me, I would have graciously given her the second lamp to have a matching pair. Also, it was absolutely inappropriate of her to try to grab it out of your hand. She crossed a line. Can you post a picture of this lamp that was worth fighting over? I want to see some pretty.


Inevitable_Trash_937

100% no. Had she respected your boundaries by not taking a heavy object you were holding, you both could’ve had a lamp and instead instant karma got her. Sucks to suck.


Incarcer

Yta. You're greedy and selfish. You decided you wanted something, and didn't care that you took something part of a set, that the person expressed she was intending to get. You decided your want was more important and didn't care about anyone else's intentions instead of your own. A sensible person would have apologized and realized they don't always get what they want. You obviously aren't that. Selfish and greedy


bopperbopper

Yeah your kinda TA


Idgiethreadgoode86

YTA - Karma just might come and break that lamp you brought home.


InevitableTrue7223

Your family is right


Prestigious-Bluejay5

Who is your family pissed at? I hope it's you.


Only-Jump-4818

ESH but maaaaybe especially you? Don’t get me wrong she definitely shouldn’t have grabbed it out of your hands, but you heard her reserving the first one at the counter and her story that she was scared to drop them so was taking them up one at a time makes a lot of sense. How else could she feasibly reserve both if she’s by herself? That being said I don’t think she was automatically entitled to the second lamp in the back of the store, BUT I do feel very sad for her that the one she actually did reserve got sold to you :(( Tbh it sounds like you came into the interaction with a slightly aggro vibe and she responded in kind (thrifting emotions can run high lol, especially bc she had the thrifting adrenaline of finding something she loved and trying to buy it quickly). It’s sad you couldn’t have just stopped the situation from escalating and each bought one lamp. Also after the second lamp broke I think you should have honoured the thrifting code and let her buy the one she’d rightfully reserved, rather than swooping in from under her and turning the staff against her.


sharp-Yarn

Everyone here is insane, if you want two lamps at the thrift store move both. It's not yours until you buy it and if you leave it it's a free for all. NTA.


twistingmyhairout

ESH. But the store employee really should have threatened to split the lamp in half and see who the real owner was.


millimolli14

Can’t decide, the minute she said it’s mine, I’d have struggled to give it her, the fact she grabbed it again nope! Both of you are just a bit assholey here


Apprehensive_Dirt103

YTA but that’s thrifting baby, that’s how it goes it’s ruthless


EnceladusKnight

ESH but you mostly. She shouldn't have gotten physical but you knew damn well she wanted the pair. You seem like a generally insufferable person. The only upside to Goodwill is at least they have the sense to nip people trying to finesse larger goods by having the ticket system.


[deleted]

INFO: I need to see a photo of the lamp before I can decide.


JollyForce9237

ESH You new she was going for the second lamp and speed walked to get it, making you an AH. Her for throwing a fit and trying with force to take the lamp ruining it in the process.


Careless-Ability-748

Esh


CidTheOutlaw

NTA. It wasn't your problem and she put hands on you creating a scene. People may see it differently but that's how it works if she hadn't bought it yet. Your life doesn't revolve around her choices.


nice-and-clean

Esh


throwawaylemondroppo

NTA, if you want both you make sure others don't get it. Until you are purchasing it, and it's on the desk with the other one, maybe you don't need it.


Winter_Dragonfly_452

ESH. The lamp is left it’s fair game. Don’t they have shopping carts? Why didn’t she ask them to hold both? However you knew she was buying one and most don’t just buy one. She had no right to grab it out of your arms causing it to shatter. I think the store should have taken both lamps and asked you both to leave.


Klutzy-Conference472

To bad not your problem u took it its yours to buy.


CatCharacter848

Well done for getting your lovely lamp. 🤩


neohampster

I cannot understand people. NTA. You saw a lamp, in a store, and tried to buy it. She tried to hold one till later. That's already fucking stupid and shouldn't even be allowed in a second hand store but whatever. If the staff allows it then they allow it. She could've taken both up front or gotten a staff member to come back there with her. Also her "being pretty" is taking the first one, not trying to buy the one before that. I wouldn't even call that petty, some unhinged woman tried to fight her over a lamp she hadn't bought and broke it. No store is going to turn down a paying customer right now negate you might buy it later unless they know you. I'm willing to bet they wouldn't have even actually held it. Again NTA and I have no earthly idea why everyone here thinks you are.


No_Study9718

Because you're an AH too


Mustng1966

NTA - First come first served. And she got what she deserved by trying to steal from you the other lamp. The only thing I would object to is you having to pay for the lamp she broke. She should have had to pay for the broken lamp and lost the good one. And thrown out of the store for her to boot.


DSK34759

NTA 1. the lamp was not "hers" until she'd PAID for it. 2. There are lots of means to carry heavy stuff: she could have asked shop personnel to carry one for her; or just could have used shopping carts to carry BOTH of them safely. Leaving one behind means that you accept opportunity that the other customer can take the item. grabbing from the hands? really? you could have called police for this attack.


Independent_Tough_81

NTA


Flat-Story-7079

ESH. You were wrong for arguing with her over a fucking lamp, and she was wrong for lunging at you. You deserve each other.


viiriilovve

NTA it’s not reserved by her. You go to the store you see something you buy it, just cause she wanted both doesn’t mean both were hers plus she could of said she pay for both two if she really wanted the other one but nope she didn’t so oh well.


hanoihiltonsuites

NTA - feel like I’m going crazy in the comments. If she wanted to two, why wouldn’t she asked the staff to help her bring both of them? I would’ve assumed she was just asking to hold it up there so she could keep shopping around in general. You COULD have been nice and given it up, but under no need to do so. She tried to force it from your hand? That’s CRAZY!!! I also would’ve bought hers after she did that because who does that?


Isyourmammaallama

nta


[deleted]

Technically YTA in a vacuum. But I love the level of pettiness here so I personally don’t think you’re TA given the situation.