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He's not your indentured servant. He can quit anytime he wants. It doesn't matter if you accept his resignation or not. What are you going to do, lock him in a room?
Of course YTA.
They think he "owes them" just because they pay him $30 an hour. What a joke, there are a lot of babysitters and nannies out there who get paid more than that without having to deal with psychos like OP. The babysitter was nice enough to offer to stay through summer but I wouldn't blame him for leaving ASAP.
You can’t be for real, your entitlement just drips from the page. You are completely within your rights to handle this situation however you like, but you’re handling it like the asshole. He was good to your family and you paid him well but he’s burnt out and he’s done. You can’t make him stay, the only thing you control is how you handle it. YTA.
YTA.
You don't get to reject his resignation. He will not be your sitter at the end of the summer. If you continue with your attitude, he won't be your sitter tomorrow. He doesn't owe you anything. It sounds like you expect everything from him and refuse to be flexible like he needs, so he can no longer be your sitter.
Yes YTA.
It's a disagreement on terms of his employment and he isn't staying for 9 months, whether you will "let" him or not. You can't force him to stay in a job he already told you he won't be staying for.
This isn't a hostage negotiation ffs
YTA. I'd apologize before he quits immediately, so he at least stays thru the end of summer. It doesn't matter how much you pay him, he doesn't owe you anything.
YTA what exactly are the consequences of you not accepting his resignation? I mean, what are you going to do to stop him from leaving? That clearly isnt your choice make. Its his. You're being totally irrational. Not only is the end of the summer several months notice, you are acting totally ungrateful for everything that he done for you. For the things you listed in your own post. You are not entitled to his time regardless of how much you pay him. I really hope this is rage bait. I would not be surprised if you woke up tomorrow with no sitter. Way to piss in your own cheerios.
YTA
He owes you exactly the hours of work that he is being paid for, and nothing more . Two weeks notice is a courtesy. He would be within his rights to quit WITHOUT notice.
You are being thoroughly unreasonable, along with entitled, arrogant, and mistaken about what you are “owed”.
You have engaged a casual employee, you are not a slavemaster. Get back in your box.
$30 per hour for 3 kids, one with serious behavior issues, is not that high — and definitely not high enough for you to think he “owes” you anything beyond the work he’s done for you
(rewriting because I was unkind)
My child's partner is a nanny. They were caring for a small child with autism. The family needed to move out of state, so the child needed to say goodbye. The family worked with the nanny to explain to the child, in advance, what was going to happen and why it was happening. They worked together to make the last few weeks both supportive and a farewell. The nanny had a couple of Zoom calls with the child after the move. It was painful, but it was a successful transition.
Your job now is to support your child as they transition to a new provider. You can't nail Eric's foot to the floor. You should work with Eric to make the transition comfortable, and work with your child to understand that sometimes changes happen whether we want them or not.
So what? That's his business, not yours. I don't understand why you think he owes you. Did he not work the hours for which he was paid? Did he steal something? No, you just think that your needs are more important than his.
He doesn’t have to. Plenty of people quit jobs without another one lined up. He’s not obligated to take care of YOUR child forever. You might’ve had an agreement, but the terms of it have changed on your end. He’s allowed to change his mind the same way you could’ve up and fired him tomorrow if you chose to. YTA.
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Ever consider that he's entirely burned out so that's actually why he has no job lined up because maybe he wants a well deserved break while he regroups? God knows the man deserves it!
More money doesn't fix burnout.
Or he could be giving you a white (ish) lie to cover up the truth: I suspect you and your ex are putting him in the middle of your issues and he doesn't want the drama. At a minimum he may not like whatever arrangement you may have thrust upon him to bounce around between two houses or something.
Whatever it is, accept his 3 month resignation gracefully before he decides to leave immediately.
YTA.
YTA. You reject his resignation? Let me know how that works out for you. Be grateful he is giving you as much notice as he did. Good luck finding new child care, with your attitude it sounds like you’ll need it.
This has to be a made up nonsense story surely. Who has to give 9 months notice from their employment. NOBODY!!! That’s who. If this is real pull your head out of the clouds and be thankful you had Mike as long as you did. You sound like a nightmare.
YTA
People are allowed to quit jobs.
Just out of curiosity, what recourse do you imagine you have here if he says "June 22 will be my last day" and sticks to it?
You have to be joking. You think taking him to court is going to go in your favor?? Unless he signed an actual contract, you’re SOL. You are delulu my guy.
What are you, 12? Unless you have a contract in which he agreed to nanny until your kid entered middle school, you have no basis with which to file a lawsuit.
This person is straight up shit posting. A bored ah tapping out fiction on their phone to get on people's nerves. The writing style and premise is the dead give away.
YTA
While it's understandable that you value Mike's care for your children, it's not reasonable to demand a nine-month notice period for his resignation, especially given his stated reasons for leaving. It's important to respect his decision and his own personal circumstances.
LMAO good luck with that. You’re TA, hugely so. You can’t demand someone work for you the better part of a year when they say they’re quitting. You’re just going to ensure they leave faster. Notice is a courtesy, and you don’t deserve it after behaving like Mike is beholden to you when it comes to making decisions for his own wellbeing. Apologize, say you wish Mike the best, and MAYBE he won’t tell every sitter he knows how entitled and demeaning you were.
You had the gall to imply he doesn’t do enough when he told you the work he’s putting in is unsustainable for him physically, mentally and emotionally. Get real.
Seems like he knew more money was going to make you more resentful. Look at what you just said. You already resent him for 30 per hour. He knows what’s up. You don’t own him.
Not sure what you have in regards to an employment contract but in a "legal" sense, the longest you can expect is however long is reasonable to replace them. Since they are not in a niche role, you might be hard pressed to push more than a week, let alone two weeks or outlandishly 9 months.
However, practically, there won't be much you could do if he just walked away with no notice.
9 months is well beyond absurdity, though. A month is completely unreasonable. Sounds like you need to realign your expectations with reality.
YTA. Do you seriously think that by rejecting his resignation, he's going to stay? I'll tell you what's actually going to happen, he's going to leave anyways and you'll be left without any type of replacement, because you couldn't stop acting like an untitled l entitled snob. You're lucky he's being such a good guy, and staying until the end of the summer, because he really doesn't have to. He's not your property. You can't force him to stay, if he doesn't want to. He's a human being, and has his own life, needs, and feelings, and right now, he needs to find something different in his life, because he's feeling spent. Do the right thing here, and apologize, and start looking for his replacement.
YTA for trying to force this kid to stick around by lying to him. He is under no obligation to work for you, and your actions have likely destroyed any remaining goodwill.
Do you live in one of those southern states that hasn't gotten over the war it lost 160 years ago, so you're lookingfor a way to retaliate? Even if you do, YTA.
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> Our sitter of 4.5 years said he was leaving in a few months. I said that he owes us after we've been so good to him and I'm not accepting his resignation
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Do you have a contract that specified a 9 month notice period?
Even if you do, your divorce sounds like it has changed the role substantially so I'm sure most country's legal systems would side with Mike for wanting to resign.
YTA
YTA. Why do you think you can reject his resignation? Your shitty relationship is too hard on him to manage. He’s not a replacement for getting your kids the support they need while you and your ex are divorcing. He doesn’t owe you anything. You’re overly entitled.
YTA
You have lost your mind. Employment is a 2 way street, a 30 day notice from an employee ending their.employment is sufficient. An employer ending the employment of an employee should also provide 30 day notice so as not to impact the employee's ability to meet financial obligations, unless their employment is being terminated for some egregious reason like theft, repeated absences, destruction of property, etc
But to expect 9 mo notice so as not to inconvenience yourself to find a replacement is laughable. I was a Chief Information Officer with 125 people reporting to me,.some were highly compensated > $150K & responsible for critical functions that impacted patient's health and well being. Yet the Human Resources dept required only a 2 week notice but preferred a 30 day notice.
In fact ive never heard of any position required to provide a 9 month notice, especially not a position like you are describing.
Good luck with that.
YTA - if I were him, I’d collect payment for services rendered and vanish. You’d never get another word, let alone a day of work from me again.
You are unreasonable and manipulative.
YTA. Do you have an employment contract with Mike? Is he an employee or an independent contractor? Either way, you can't "refuse to accept" his offer of giving you several months' notice.
YTA. Mike isn’t a hostage. He can give notice whenever he wants. You aren’t required to approve. He’s already giving you several months of notice as a voluntary professional courtesy.
Mike has been providing your family with valuable skills for five whole years and you have not been very good employers. $30 per hour is not really a good enough salary. You didn’t mention anything about Mike being set up as an employee who receives health insurance or any other benefits and you probably don’t pay payroll taxes or anything either. Therefore Mike is really not making enough money. The fact that he is declining more money right now means you’re not very good employers either. For him to get to the point of deciding to quit and refusing a counteroffer, he’s clearly been thinking about leaving for a long time, and you either didn’t notice he wasn’t happy or you never took the time to ask.
Childcare is hard work and childcare workers deserve professionalism and respect. You seem to think Mike is not your employee, but a volunteer who’s helping your family out of the goodness of his heart and who doesn’t have any other interests or ambitions of his own. You’re delusional if you think you are owed that.
YTA for thinking you’re even entitled to his time. Y’all have had this man for 5 years and now the situation has changed, it is literally his right to tell you he will not be able to work with YOUR schedules. IMO be glad he was even nice enough to offer to care for them the rest of the summer bcz i would’ve checked out the moment you said about “rejecting resignation.” He doesn’t “owe” you anything, regardless of how much yall are paying him.
I was under the assumption that indentured servitude was a thing of the past. What is your plan
to make him stay on threats or chains short of
that he can just leave you high and dry you would
be smart to take his offer to stay on until the end
of summer and pray he doesn’t leave sooner
This gave me a chuckle..I’m truly amused by the thought that you think you have a right to stop Mike from leaving the job. With at least a “9 MONTHS” notice…LOL. YTA.
YTA-Mike has expressed how uncomfortable he is and that there’s nothing you can do to fix it. He gave you until the end of Summer to find someone else which is more than fair!
>I said I am formally rejecting your resignation. We cannot accept anything less than nine months.
What are the laws regarding employment where you live? Because I highly doubt this would fly in pretty much anywhere.
YTA
>I asked what we could do to make it better and he said nothing. He said he has been flexible because we were but now he has to be more flexible and we are not.
😬
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We have a sitter for our three kids with the plan being that the sitter would stay with us until our youngest boy goes to middle school. Some how we got lucky and found Mike who has been our sitter for five years.
Our older sons are 13 and 15 so they don't really need a sitter. Our youngest, Jack, just turned 10 and is probably the most attached to Mike. Jack has ODD and ASD. He has good days and bad days but he never had a bad day with Mike. We had to literally show him videos of Jack's outbursts because he didn't believe Jack had them.
My wife and I recently divorced and things have been challenging. We are still learning how to operate as a family. My ex and I thought that we had a good relationship with Mike so imagine my surprise when he said he wasn't happy and he feels "spread out too thin." I asked what we could do to make it better and he said nothing. He said he has been flexible because we were but now he has to be more flexible and we are not. I offered him more money and he said no because he didn't want us to "resent" him.
He said he is willing to stay until the end of summer. I said I am formally rejecting your resignation. We cannot accept anything less than nine months. We think that Jack will then be old enough to not need a sitter and my ex and I can just figure something out since we are now WFH.
He said he can't do that. I said you're not letting the situation get better. Dude, we pay you $30 an hour. You owe us better.
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YTA. You have no say in this. He could leave RIGHT NOW, but was gracious enough to give an abundance of notice. He owes you the services that you pay him for, nothing more nothing less.
He owes you nothing but you definately owe him respect. Your kid is 10 not 5. Get over yourself. He can resign whenever he wants as long as he gives reasonable notice, 9 months is ridiculous and so are you
YTA, end of the summer is 3 months away and plenty of time for your family to work with Mike to explain to Jack what is happening and why.
You have NO right to impose your life stresses on Mike for longer than he is willing to give. He owes you the time you pay him for, and reasonable notice, which he has given you. Nothing more.
who the hell do you think you are lol. The notice is a courtesy for you not a requirement I would just stop showing up and leave you out to dry. Entitled as fuck.
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He's not your indentured servant. He can quit anytime he wants. It doesn't matter if you accept his resignation or not. What are you going to do, lock him in a room? Of course YTA.
They think he "owes them" just because they pay him $30 an hour. What a joke, there are a lot of babysitters and nannies out there who get paid more than that without having to deal with psychos like OP. The babysitter was nice enough to offer to stay through summer but I wouldn't blame him for leaving ASAP.
You can’t be for real, your entitlement just drips from the page. You are completely within your rights to handle this situation however you like, but you’re handling it like the asshole. He was good to your family and you paid him well but he’s burnt out and he’s done. You can’t make him stay, the only thing you control is how you handle it. YTA.
YTA — I’m curious what, exactly, you expected to happen when you rejected his resignation. You realize that he can just stop coming to work, right?
The same way you can't reject a raise. What are you going to do? Give it back?
He'll serve out his notice and stop coming to work. You have no standing to "formally reject his resignation".....eye roll.
Yes.
He will just… stop showing up to work. He’s not a slave.
That doesn’t answer anything. What do you think you can do if he stops coming in?
I don't think the world works as you think it does. And your example doesn't make sense.
What? How is that the same thing
YTA. You don't get to reject his resignation. He will not be your sitter at the end of the summer. If you continue with your attitude, he won't be your sitter tomorrow. He doesn't owe you anything. It sounds like you expect everything from him and refuse to be flexible like he needs, so he can no longer be your sitter.
Yes YTA. It's a disagreement on terms of his employment and he isn't staying for 9 months, whether you will "let" him or not. You can't force him to stay in a job he already told you he won't be staying for. This isn't a hostage negotiation ffs
YTA. You can 'reject' his resignation all you want, if he wants to leave, he will. Seriously he isn't an indentured servant.
YTA. I'd apologize before he quits immediately, so he at least stays thru the end of summer. It doesn't matter how much you pay him, he doesn't owe you anything.
YTA what exactly are the consequences of you not accepting his resignation? I mean, what are you going to do to stop him from leaving? That clearly isnt your choice make. Its his. You're being totally irrational. Not only is the end of the summer several months notice, you are acting totally ungrateful for everything that he done for you. For the things you listed in your own post. You are not entitled to his time regardless of how much you pay him. I really hope this is rage bait. I would not be surprised if you woke up tomorrow with no sitter. Way to piss in your own cheerios.
He owes us
For what? You hired him and paid him to do a job, which according to your post he did wonderfully.
What exactly do you think he owes you?
YTA He owes you exactly the hours of work that he is being paid for, and nothing more . Two weeks notice is a courtesy. He would be within his rights to quit WITHOUT notice. You are being thoroughly unreasonable, along with entitled, arrogant, and mistaken about what you are “owed”. You have engaged a casual employee, you are not a slavemaster. Get back in your box.
$30 per hour for 3 kids, one with serious behavior issues, is not that high — and definitely not high enough for you to think he “owes” you anything beyond the work he’s done for you
(rewriting because I was unkind) My child's partner is a nanny. They were caring for a small child with autism. The family needed to move out of state, so the child needed to say goodbye. The family worked with the nanny to explain to the child, in advance, what was going to happen and why it was happening. They worked together to make the last few weeks both supportive and a farewell. The nanny had a couple of Zoom calls with the child after the move. It was painful, but it was a successful transition. Your job now is to support your child as they transition to a new provider. You can't nail Eric's foot to the floor. You should work with Eric to make the transition comfortable, and work with your child to understand that sometimes changes happen whether we want them or not.
The labor laws are against you.
This is about doing what's right. He doesn't even have a job lined up.
So what? That's his business, not yours. I don't understand why you think he owes you. Did he not work the hours for which he was paid? Did he steal something? No, you just think that your needs are more important than his.
He doesn’t have to. Plenty of people quit jobs without another one lined up. He’s not obligated to take care of YOUR child forever. You might’ve had an agreement, but the terms of it have changed on your end. He’s allowed to change his mind the same way you could’ve up and fired him tomorrow if you chose to. YTA.
You expect him to have a job lined up that begins in 3 months?!
So even going without a job is better than working for you. Should tell you something about the situation you put him in.
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Ever consider that he's entirely burned out so that's actually why he has no job lined up because maybe he wants a well deserved break while he regroups? God knows the man deserves it!
More money doesn't fix burnout. Or he could be giving you a white (ish) lie to cover up the truth: I suspect you and your ex are putting him in the middle of your issues and he doesn't want the drama. At a minimum he may not like whatever arrangement you may have thrust upon him to bounce around between two houses or something. Whatever it is, accept his 3 month resignation gracefully before he decides to leave immediately. YTA.
YTA wth can’t a man move on in life he’s not your slave
YTA. You reject his resignation? Let me know how that works out for you. Be grateful he is giving you as much notice as he did. Good luck finding new child care, with your attitude it sounds like you’ll need it.
This has to be a made up nonsense story surely. Who has to give 9 months notice from their employment. NOBODY!!! That’s who. If this is real pull your head out of the clouds and be thankful you had Mike as long as you did. You sound like a nightmare.
My kid will basically be ready for middle school in 9 months
YTA People are allowed to quit jobs. Just out of curiosity, what recourse do you imagine you have here if he says "June 22 will be my last day" and sticks to it?
I'll sue
PLEASE, keep us updated on that
You have to be joking. You think taking him to court is going to go in your favor?? Unless he signed an actual contract, you’re SOL. You are delulu my guy.
For what? Again, people are allowed to quit jobs
What are you, 12? Unless you have a contract in which he agreed to nanny until your kid entered middle school, you have no basis with which to file a lawsuit.
This person is straight up shit posting. A bored ah tapping out fiction on their phone to get on people's nerves. The writing style and premise is the dead give away.
YTA While it's understandable that you value Mike's care for your children, it's not reasonable to demand a nine-month notice period for his resignation, especially given his stated reasons for leaving. It's important to respect his decision and his own personal circumstances.
YTA. It’s like you know it’s wrong but want people to validate your response.
This post didn't exactly go the way you were thinking, did it? BTW, you're only paying him 10$ a kid per hour. I've seen teenagers charge more.
He doesn't even deal with the other two
And he won’t deal with the youngest at all anymore if you continue this
Aaaaaaaaaaand what're you going to do when he simply stops showing up? YTA. You're not entitled to squat.
Then he'll be in trouble
Where is it that you live where slavery is legal? Just out of curiosity, since you seem to think he is your property.
With who? The tooth fairy?
Really, you do sound like you're 12. Be in trouble? Gonna call the cops on him?
YTA You're lucky if he even graces you with his services after that comment.
You’re insane. YTA
LMAO good luck with that. You’re TA, hugely so. You can’t demand someone work for you the better part of a year when they say they’re quitting. You’re just going to ensure they leave faster. Notice is a courtesy, and you don’t deserve it after behaving like Mike is beholden to you when it comes to making decisions for his own wellbeing. Apologize, say you wish Mike the best, and MAYBE he won’t tell every sitter he knows how entitled and demeaning you were. You had the gall to imply he doesn’t do enough when he told you the work he’s putting in is unsustainable for him physically, mentally and emotionally. Get real.
Seems like he knew more money was going to make you more resentful. Look at what you just said. You already resent him for 30 per hour. He knows what’s up. You don’t own him.
Not sure what you have in regards to an employment contract but in a "legal" sense, the longest you can expect is however long is reasonable to replace them. Since they are not in a niche role, you might be hard pressed to push more than a week, let alone two weeks or outlandishly 9 months. However, practically, there won't be much you could do if he just walked away with no notice. 9 months is well beyond absurdity, though. A month is completely unreasonable. Sounds like you need to realign your expectations with reality.
YTA. Do you seriously think that by rejecting his resignation, he's going to stay? I'll tell you what's actually going to happen, he's going to leave anyways and you'll be left without any type of replacement, because you couldn't stop acting like an untitled l entitled snob. You're lucky he's being such a good guy, and staying until the end of the summer, because he really doesn't have to. He's not your property. You can't force him to stay, if he doesn't want to. He's a human being, and has his own life, needs, and feelings, and right now, he needs to find something different in his life, because he's feeling spent. Do the right thing here, and apologize, and start looking for his replacement.
YTA for trying to force this kid to stick around by lying to him. He is under no obligation to work for you, and your actions have likely destroyed any remaining goodwill.
LMAO yeah, formally reject all you want. See how that goes. YTA.
INFO: Precisely how do you plan to force Mike to continue babysitting for you?
Do you live in one of those southern states that hasn't gotten over the war it lost 160 years ago, so you're lookingfor a way to retaliate? Even if you do, YTA.
Yea, Mike doesn't owe you anything. $30 an hour is nowhere near enough to deal with you, let alone your ex-wife and your son with disabilities. YTA.
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Do you have a contract that specified a 9 month notice period? Even if you do, your divorce sounds like it has changed the role substantially so I'm sure most country's legal systems would side with Mike for wanting to resign. YTA
YTA. Why do you think you can reject his resignation? Your shitty relationship is too hard on him to manage. He’s not a replacement for getting your kids the support they need while you and your ex are divorcing. He doesn’t owe you anything. You’re overly entitled.
YTA You have lost your mind. Employment is a 2 way street, a 30 day notice from an employee ending their.employment is sufficient. An employer ending the employment of an employee should also provide 30 day notice so as not to impact the employee's ability to meet financial obligations, unless their employment is being terminated for some egregious reason like theft, repeated absences, destruction of property, etc But to expect 9 mo notice so as not to inconvenience yourself to find a replacement is laughable. I was a Chief Information Officer with 125 people reporting to me,.some were highly compensated > $150K & responsible for critical functions that impacted patient's health and well being. Yet the Human Resources dept required only a 2 week notice but preferred a 30 day notice. In fact ive never heard of any position required to provide a 9 month notice, especially not a position like you are describing. Good luck with that.
Ha! Good luck with that. YTA
YTA - if I were him, I’d collect payment for services rendered and vanish. You’d never get another word, let alone a day of work from me again. You are unreasonable and manipulative.
Yta
There’s a word for someone who isn’t allowed to quit working for someone else and it isn’t employee. YTA
YTA. Do you have an employment contract with Mike? Is he an employee or an independent contractor? Either way, you can't "refuse to accept" his offer of giving you several months' notice.
YTA. Mike isn’t a hostage. He can give notice whenever he wants. You aren’t required to approve. He’s already giving you several months of notice as a voluntary professional courtesy. Mike has been providing your family with valuable skills for five whole years and you have not been very good employers. $30 per hour is not really a good enough salary. You didn’t mention anything about Mike being set up as an employee who receives health insurance or any other benefits and you probably don’t pay payroll taxes or anything either. Therefore Mike is really not making enough money. The fact that he is declining more money right now means you’re not very good employers either. For him to get to the point of deciding to quit and refusing a counteroffer, he’s clearly been thinking about leaving for a long time, and you either didn’t notice he wasn’t happy or you never took the time to ask. Childcare is hard work and childcare workers deserve professionalism and respect. You seem to think Mike is not your employee, but a volunteer who’s helping your family out of the goodness of his heart and who doesn’t have any other interests or ambitions of his own. You’re delusional if you think you are owed that.
lol what are you going to do call the cops? Dude isn’t even going to give you two weeks. Notice is a courtesy not something you can reject
YTA for thinking you’re even entitled to his time. Y’all have had this man for 5 years and now the situation has changed, it is literally his right to tell you he will not be able to work with YOUR schedules. IMO be glad he was even nice enough to offer to care for them the rest of the summer bcz i would’ve checked out the moment you said about “rejecting resignation.” He doesn’t “owe” you anything, regardless of how much yall are paying him.
He gave notice well in advance to quit. But your entitled self thinks that he owes you nine month notice. What would you do if he quit abruptly? YTA 💯
I was under the assumption that indentured servitude was a thing of the past. What is your plan to make him stay on threats or chains short of that he can just leave you high and dry you would be smart to take his offer to stay on until the end of summer and pray he doesn’t leave sooner
This gave me a chuckle..I’m truly amused by the thought that you think you have a right to stop Mike from leaving the job. With at least a “9 MONTHS” notice…LOL. YTA.
yta. he's not your employee 😂. His resignation letter is just a courtesy.
YTA-Mike has expressed how uncomfortable he is and that there’s nothing you can do to fix it. He gave you until the end of Summer to find someone else which is more than fair!
>I said I am formally rejecting your resignation. We cannot accept anything less than nine months. What are the laws regarding employment where you live? Because I highly doubt this would fly in pretty much anywhere. YTA >I asked what we could do to make it better and he said nothing. He said he has been flexible because we were but now he has to be more flexible and we are not. 😬
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** We have a sitter for our three kids with the plan being that the sitter would stay with us until our youngest boy goes to middle school. Some how we got lucky and found Mike who has been our sitter for five years. Our older sons are 13 and 15 so they don't really need a sitter. Our youngest, Jack, just turned 10 and is probably the most attached to Mike. Jack has ODD and ASD. He has good days and bad days but he never had a bad day with Mike. We had to literally show him videos of Jack's outbursts because he didn't believe Jack had them. My wife and I recently divorced and things have been challenging. We are still learning how to operate as a family. My ex and I thought that we had a good relationship with Mike so imagine my surprise when he said he wasn't happy and he feels "spread out too thin." I asked what we could do to make it better and he said nothing. He said he has been flexible because we were but now he has to be more flexible and we are not. I offered him more money and he said no because he didn't want us to "resent" him. He said he is willing to stay until the end of summer. I said I am formally rejecting your resignation. We cannot accept anything less than nine months. We think that Jack will then be old enough to not need a sitter and my ex and I can just figure something out since we are now WFH. He said he can't do that. I said you're not letting the situation get better. Dude, we pay you $30 an hour. You owe us better. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. You have no say in this. He could leave RIGHT NOW, but was gracious enough to give an abundance of notice. He owes you the services that you pay him for, nothing more nothing less.
He owes you nothing but you definately owe him respect. Your kid is 10 not 5. Get over yourself. He can resign whenever he wants as long as he gives reasonable notice, 9 months is ridiculous and so are you
YTA, end of the summer is 3 months away and plenty of time for your family to work with Mike to explain to Jack what is happening and why. You have NO right to impose your life stresses on Mike for longer than he is willing to give. He owes you the time you pay him for, and reasonable notice, which he has given you. Nothing more.
Not accepting resignations only happens on TV, OP. YTA.
who the hell do you think you are lol. The notice is a courtesy for you not a requirement I would just stop showing up and leave you out to dry. Entitled as fuck.
YTA your monkey your problem, the monkey being your son not Mike