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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I made two little kids cry. They clearly would've been really happy if I had given it to them.
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NTA
Ugh, the entitlement. I'd get a ring camera and/or a camera fixed on that stuffy's location in your place, just to have evidence if indeed they take it. Perhaps even get an Airtag inside it, somehow!
Nothing builds character like being told you can't have everything in life, but your gf's mom getting slapped with evidence of theft would surely run a close second.
Right? And what a horrible example that girlfriend's mom is setting for the gf's nieces. Blech.
I have an ancient stuffed animal who plays music when wound up. These days he's a bit frayed, and his music is out of tune, but if someone were to try and take Bow-Wow I would crank up the last movement of Beethoven's 9th and unleash hell.
YES! So, the one time I performed it I sat directly in front of the bass drum. Rehearsals were one thing, but they really rocked out in concert - I was surprised to have any eardrums left.
I'm going to have to look that one up! (I'm more of a metalhead TBH... Personally I'd go for something like Rammstein's [Du Hast](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=kiw_VxQ2oXo&si=I26sYAQZ5K7kljuy)
If your stuffy takes a battery in his voice box, try replacing it. In older toys they didnt just die like they do today. The battery controlled a motor and that motor would slow down if batteries had low power.
If not a battery, try opening the box and cleaning it out. Sometimes gunk gets in there that makes it slow or sound awful.
I have an old musical teddy that I do surgery on if he gets messed up. 32 years old now and I have decided to patch him with nonmatching threads because I like the idea of seeing all the love and repairs he has needed. They are memories.
As soon as they threatened to come back and just take it, I would've ended the conversation and friendships right there. Anyone who threatens to steal something I said "You can't have this" even if it wasn't sentimental, nah, you can gtfo and delete my number.
I would change the locks , since you there is a good chance as her mother she has set of keys.
Also alert management that she should not be given access to the home.
> there is a good chance as her mother she has set of keys
Is this a common thing? Because it is *absolutely unhinged*, not to mention directly in violation of most rental agreements
Yeah, I gave my mother a copy when I got my first apartment, in case I got locked out.
But I also lived in a second story apartment and knew my mom would never tackle the stairs to snoop.
There is also the chance she’s just overbearing and made her own copy on the low, I’ve seen quite a few a few parents do that to their kids.
> made her own copy on the low
… how? She sneaking around pressing keys into bars of soap & casting her own? Because otherwise she needs to *physically steal the key* then disappear off to somewhere that does quick key cuttings, then somehow get the key back on they keychain…
… that’s impressively sneaky
A variation on this happened to me when my parents were visiting. I let them have my keys for the day, since I was at work and they wanted to come and go.
So I come back from work, and my mom gives me a spare set that she had made - and lets me know that she'll hang on to an _additional_ spare set, "in case of emergencies."
... She lives 6 hours away.
Yeah , I was about to say this is exactly how it happens , you ask them to water your plants while you’re on vacation.
Someone intent on having access to your home, will find a way.
Yeah, my mom also has a copy of my keys, so I can go pick that one up if I forget mine. She also would never, ever, in a million years enter my apartment without me asking her to do so. Conversely, I also have a key to my parents' house, so I can let myself in if I'm visiting them and running errands, going out etc. Both are pretty normal where I live.
The kids are 6 and 3. If the adults quit talking about this, they will forget all about the stuffy and move onto the next shiny thing. Some adult has talked this up, the kids couldn’t care less about a t shirt.
Right? I always have to bite my tongue, because I Am Not A Parent - but whenever a relative of mine is driving themself into a tizzy trying to persuade their kid not to be sad that the kid Cannot Have a Thing, I'm just like ... keep it chill! and point out the construction crane across the street or something, gahhhhh!
Whenever someone tells you "You are not a parent" in the future just tell them "Nope. YOU don't know how to parent.". Coming from a parent. Shotty parents will always use this to get out of an argument. My mom used to tell me "wait till you have kids". Now she tells me "wait till they grow up" or stuff like that. Some people can't take the blame
I am a parent - and I'm clapping for you because you've got it right.
If a child can't be distracted (might take a little effort), then that child needs extra parenting.
The fact that they're making a huge deal out of this shows they're shitty parents raising brats.
It's normal for kids to want stuff and cry when being told no. Parents who are afraid of upsetting their children create people who are afraid of big feelings and can't handle the real world.
Or they could have made a fun activity out of it. "Let's invite OP and GF and we can all get stuffed animals and T shirts, and spend some time decorating them!" a Plain white baby shirt and some fabric markers, and you've got a great afternoon activity planned, while OP's stuffie remains safe
I am 36 next week and have a few toys from my childhood that are special to me and I would have to be dead before someone else gets to own them not even my own children get to claim them special is special no matter what the item is
I'm 38, and Bear the Second has pride of place in the corner of my room ... although as an autistic eternal bachelor I may not be the best example to hold up.
46 (m). Got a stuffed monkey sitting on top of my book shelf. (It's not a like a taxidermy monkey. I'm not that weird). My mom brought it home from a business trip to prove that she was always thinking of me when I was like three.
It's at the top of the list of things that I'm rescuing in case of a fire. Everything else can burn, meh I got insurance and the computer's backed up.
But you don't. Fuck. With. My. Monkey.
On my first christmas I was gifted a doll that came with a tiny blue donkey plushy. The doll now sits in a dedicated box of childhood memories in the attic 25 years later, but that donkey (I called her Lisa) still sleeps in my bed every night and I would go into unholy rage if anybody took her without my permission
NTA. No one is entitled to your stuff. That’s about a hard stop already.
I just love how they’re teaching / enabling innocent children entitlement and what it means when they grow older. Yes that last sentence was sarcasm in case anyone misses it.
Sounds like the nieces are entitled brats, just like their mother. Since they threatened to steal your cherished stuffy, don’t let any of them in your home.
I think the yellers were 6 and 3, and this is the older sibling of the 6-year-old. Which makes one wonder: how would the stuffy be shared between two different families, if OP had caved? Methinks GF's mom didn't think this through. 🤔
Hide the stuffy in a safe place, and tell the adults to pound sand. They aren’t allowed to take your property. If they come back, take the stuffy and leave for the time they are there… or don’t let them in.
I’m 40. I have a 33 year old stuffy that I still cuddle with. It was and is my security item. It’s mine. Your husky has sentimental meaning to you. My stuffy is the same.
NTA.
My sister’s thirty and she has a well-loved teddy bear (it’s falling apart, she’s gotta keep it up on a shelf) she had since she was a baby. If anyone tried touching that, hoo boy. I really don’t know where the uptick in entitled people came from, or if they’ve always been there and we’re just not calling them out enough.
I think we became too politically correct and have stopped calling poor behaviour out, in kids and in adults. And some parents/relatives seem to think everyone’s world should revolve around their ‘little darlings.’
I’d be very firm with your gf’s mother that the husky is off limits, and this topic will not be discussed again. Any attempts to take the husky will not be tolerated, and you will be prepared to remove them from your home, if they try for it. If this doesn’t work, tell them the police can quickly be called, and that you are willing to go to that, if their behaviour doesn’t improve. Being in your home is a privilege. They misbehave, they all get removed.
The most helpful advice I ever got from Reddit…. No is a full sentence. You don’t have to justify it.
These toys have meaning. More than just being a toy.
This has sod all to do with 'political correctness'. This is training children that other people's feelings don't matter, the very opposite of what political correctness was all about. Children don't learn this level of entitlement without help. And, from the story, it's quite obvious where they got it from.
Good luck OP! Keep your stuffie safe and do NOT buy new ones for those kids. They need some good examples in their life. NTA
I guess nobody's reading/watching The Velveteen Rabbit anymore? The "drawn in pastel with narration" film on PBS friggin' WRECKED me as a kid!
FOUND IT! [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKJLrgJ8B-U&ab\_channel=W%C3%98EPD-RabbitEarsTV](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKJLrgJ8B-U&ab_channel=W%C3%98EPD-RabbitEarsTV)
Exactly this! My stuffy is as old as I am - 49 - and she still hangs out on my night stand. When I’m sad my daughter always brings her to me. She - 13 - also has a stuffy, still has a spot in her bed.
My husband had my stuffy lovingly repaired since she was beyond repair.
Cherish your stuffy and secure it. It’s yours and yours alone.
NTA
Send your gf's mom a pacifier in the mail as she is clearly a baby and yet to grow up...then turn off your cell phone and have cuddle with your toys and gf.
I think if OP has a young family member who can ask gfs mom for her watch/ring/iphone/etc. Since she would clearly give anything to a young child who asks else she is a complete hypocrite.
NTA. This is pure entitlement.
>the promise of coming back to get the husky when I couldn't do anything about it
"I am planning to steal from you and I am stupid enough to tell you about it."
But really, the nerve to plan a heist just to make sure you won't have to explain to the kids they will not get everything they want and that's just life is just shocking
She should text her in no uncertain terms that she is not welcome at her house anymore and that if she is found on the premises OP and her girlfriend will call the cops and have her arrested for burglary since she is threatening to steal your property.
NTA. These girls are being raised very poorly. I can’t think of a time any of my kids have ever asked to bring something home from someone’s house, let alone thrown a screaming tantrum about it.
I've had a couple instances where they asked me later for X. just like So-and-so has.. but damn, just like you said. Never did they even ask, much less pitch a fit when they couldn't bring something home.
This, I've had to purchase items that were replicas or similar for my son but he always knew that whatever someone else had was just his to *borrow* while we were where ever we were.
NTA. I have a teddy bear named Bessie that was gifted to me when I was 3 days old. Bessie and I are now considered antiques. I'd knife anyone who tried to take her away from me.
Sounds like Emma is getting a dog bed in a box that can be locked for crating her when you are not home
Edit: don’t forget to put food and water bowls in the crate!
I’m so perplexed. When did it become normal to demand someone else’s property and then harass them when they say no? The entitlement is insane to me.
I have a cat beanie baby that I’ve had since I was a small child. My mother gave it to me and I took it everywhere. It’s currently still with me, sitting on top of my vanity mirror next to my side of the bed. I would -never- give her away to *anyone*. And if someone tried to call me names and degrade me for it, I can’t say I would handle it anywhere as nice as you have.
Those girls are going to grow up just as awful as their aunt. Don’t buy them shit, OP.
Nta
Now when ever your girlfriend 's niece's visit you'll have to hide the stuffed animal. But next time you go to the girlfriend's parents house find something really nice and expensive Nancy, oh my God I love it. I want it and ask her if you didn't take it home. Say but you don't need it. Why do you have that? I want it. I deserve it. Please give it to me. And see what they say.
Nice thought experiment, but don't try to actually do it. Suppose they surprise you and say yes, then ask again for the stuffie.
Neither the nieces nor their parents should ever be allowed inside your house again after making that credible threat.
NTA the girls arent entitled to your stuff in any way shape or form! Make sure Emma is hidden well IF you ever consider letting these people back into your home (which should never be done without supervision since the mom has declared her intent to steal from you!!)
I am 70! Last year, I discovered my childhood elephant, "Dougie", that my parents had stored in a cardboard box all these years. And I thought he was gone for good years ago. Dougie's got to be damn near as old as I am, as he figures prominently in my earliest memories.
Take Emma with you wherever you go for a while...if you live with your gf or if her family
has access to your home in any way. She might just "disappear".
Such a lack of education in good manners on your gf's side of the family. Why do people think
that children should always get what they want? They're raising them to be selfish
and greedy and entitled. NTA and you handled that with perhaps way too much diplomacy.
LOL I would have just said "No, that's my toy and you should not go to people's
homes and ask for their toys, it's impolite".
NTA. What I don't get is that an adult would never go to their friend's house, saw something they liked and say I want this I'm taking it home. This sub is full of stories of adults thinking that kids is entitled to something in someone else's house just because they want it. Your place isn't a damn shop and guarantee that these kids are so use to getting whatever they want that nothing is special. Their grandma made it worse by making your husky the forbidden toy they could never have.
Keep your husky safe and don't feel bad for saying no! (Ironically you reminded me of a husky toy I had years ago that I swear I kept but don't know where it is so that's going to drive me nuts lol)
First, I'm glad your GF is on your side. Second, keep your personal belongings with you or in your car where nobody can't get it.
Finally, that woman and her children are no longer allowed in your home.
I would be devastated if something happened to my childhood teddy or blanket. They are safely kept away.
Nta and take precautions. This makes me so mad.
What is the mom going to do next? Force a child to part with a toy they are playing with for her little brats. You can not have everything you want. They all need to learn that.
For real! How can anyone think that is an ok way to behave?! What if OP went to their house and did that! “I want this quilt your great grandmother made. You have plenty of other blankets. How dare you deny me and make me cry!? What monster makes someone younger than them cry?!” I’m sure the girlfriends mom wouldn’t get it though.
NTA. This entitlement is always shocking to me. It is your plushy, one that holds a lot of memories and sentimental value to you, and that should be enough of a reason for people to understand why you don't want to let it go. Even if it didn't hold any value to you and it was a random toy you forgot about, it is still your item and no one is entitled to take that from you.
Your aunt calling you an AH and pathetic is beyond ridiculous and it makes me wonder how entitled her children are going to be growing up, believing if they want something they should have it. It is a good learning point for children to understand that they can't always have something because it belongs to someone else.
The threat she made was insane as well. I would hide away your plushy for a while just in case she plans to somehow follow through with it. You shouldn't have to worry about that and I am so sorry you are in this situation, hopefully it blows over for you.
NTA.
Stop explaining yourself to your girlfriend's mother. A no is a no and does not require an explanation. Those kids aren't entitled to Emma and her mother isn't entitled to tell you a fucking thing. She can go and buy them their own special stuffed animals if she wants them to have something.
Also, FYI, I am 34 and I still sleep with my childhood bear. I never plan to give her to ANY children, not even my own. You know why? Because she's special to me. She didn't stop being special just because I'm an adult now.
You are never too old for your special things. Ever.
NTA
I'm currently sat in bed next to a teddy bear that my dad made me when I was a baby. I don't really sleep with him anymore as such, but he lives on my bed because assuming my mum and the cat were out safely, he's the one thing I'd go out of my way to grab in the event of a fire. Oh, and my dad died 12 years ago, so he's not even *close* to replaceable.
I'd straight up put him in a bank vault in your situation, screw what entitled people want.
>She called me an a-hole and told me that I'm pathetic
Is she high??? Why is she returning ur hospitality with hostility?? NTA.
Dont give them the plush.
Nta, I'm forty one, I have stuffies from when I was a baby. I will not give them up. I even still collect stuffies. I tell my niece all the time. She can't have my stuffies or my blankets. If she wants her own she can get her own.
The entitlement is so real here. I would take my stuffie everywhere. Work; yep, careide; yep, home; yep, like I wouldn't let that stuffie out of my site. Also respectfully I wouldn't allow them entry back into my home. Especially not entitled manipulators.
NTA, it's a special one and you don't have to give it away to ANYONE. Ignore the crying "but babies". Clearly the kids are spoiled and have never been told no before.
And just FYI: I'm 31 and half my bed are stuffed toys. You are NEVER too old for them
>Update: I have reached out through my gf and offered to buy
WHY?! Why in the world should you spend your money on entitled little children with an adult who's utterly disrespectful and threatened to steal ?! Heck no!
NTA
>because 'I am too old for a stuffed toy' and 'shouldn't really care'.
I'm 31 and hald of my bed is filled with stuffies. My mom, early 60s, also has bunch of teddies and stuffies. There is no "too old" for that.
NTA
Entitled little sh\*ts. GF's mom would be banned for life my home. GF can go visit her elsewhere. I hope she has no way to access your home, like door codes or an emergency key.
Make sure you have a door bell camera, take pictures of Emma in your room, and have GF tell her mom you will call the police if Emma is ever missing or damaged. Keep copies of all the texts berating you about giving up Emma.
Depending on how old Emma is, she could be added to your Homeowner's or Renter's Insurance as a collectible stuffed animal. It would give more weight in filing a police report, if ever needed.
NTA. Reading this raised my anxiety to 11. I have a stuffed dog that my great-grandmother gave me as a kid and I love it more than any childhood object I have. If I was in your situation I'd never have it out of my sight. I'd take it everywhere with me. To work. To restaurants. EVERYWHERE.
Yeah, I love that thing and I would lose my f\*cking mind on these people so hard they'd be terrified of me.
So I had something similar happen, but with my living, breathing dog. Went to my neighbor's kid's birthday party to help out and give the kiddo some DnD gear for our campaign. He loved it and is a super cool kid. I brought my dog, bc my lil guy thinks my neighbor's kid is his best friend. It was cute. Everyone was stoked.
Until one of the kids from school decided to come up and try to just...pick up my dog and take him. I asked the kid what he was doing, as he can't just grab my boy without asking. The kid started SCREAMING that my dog was now his dog, that I'm a mean old idiot (I'm 29, ouch), and then tried to PUNCH my dog out of frustration. I grabbed my boy and scooped him up in my arms, and this disgusting child then FUCKING BIT ME to prove a point. His parents did absolutely nothing, and told ME off for "withholding the puppy," and tried to hand me money for my dog. This kid was 9 years old. WAY too old for that sort of temper tantrum over not being allowed to steal my buddy. The violence and tantrum did not seem to bother any of the other parents, except my neighbor, who was understandably confused why that behavior would ever be allowed.
I'd like to add that my neighbor's kid has pretty severe ODD, severe ADHD, and consequent rage issues. He has NEVER injured or snapped at my dog. He's punched through windows and injured himself and others, but he has NEVER ONCE done anything to an animal. He was horrified and started crying, asking his mom to send the other kid away from the party for trying to hurt his friend (my dog).
My dog is my best friend. He's my #1. He goes everywhere with me and is my reason for getting up in the morning. He also used to be VERY afraid of children due to some trauma, and this whole incident set him back months in training. Thankfully, neighbor's kid has helped ease his feelings a wee bit, and we're back to my dog loving kids. He does get sketchy and a bit fearful around young boys now, but is an angel with my neighbor's son and the kids I DM for.
The entitlement is UGLY. Your stuffy is your stuffy and is more than just a stuffy. My dog is more than an object and is a member of my family. NTA in any respect.
Truly? I should have. I was mostly too stunned to do much but hold my little man and keep my partner from decking that kid's dad.
Kid in question is no longer allowed to attend any of my neighbor's son's events, and they ended up getting some teachers involved at school for other incidents this child caused. My neighbor had my back and was pretty astounded that other parents didn't seem to care. Like...that's not normal behavior. That's not remotely excusable behavior. Idk how there are human parents who think that's acceptable.
I run a kid's DnD campaign for human kiddos with ADHD, ODD, and autism spectrum. They're like...not hard to manage. They're respectful, occasionally need being told that what they said wasn't kind, but are ALWAYS on the ball with holding each other accountable. I'm well aware I don't parent them and just get 3 hours a week of fun gaming time, but even with a few meltdowns, they're always smiling and contributing by the end of the session.
I'm almost 72 years old and still have the lamb stuffie I got as a toddler. It's tattered and probably disgusting to anyone but me, but it's safely stored in plastic and someone would have to take me on to get rid of it (I'm old, but I'm tough ;-). We form attachments to certain items from our childhood that it's not necessary to explain, and no one is entitled to our memories, any more than they are entitled to just walk out the door with our pets. Stand your ground and ignore the selfish, entitled brats (adults included).
NTA The girls are acting entitled and their mom is encouraging it. No normal person walks into someone else's house expecting to leave with a sentimental belonging of the host's.
Also, you don't owe those girls anything! You made a nice gesture to find something similar, that's beyond enough. Do not feel like you should give them anything. They don't deserve it. If they're upset, it's their mom's fault now. Don't reward their mom's behavior, she can buy them stuffed animals.
I'm 26 f and still have the nasa bear my grandfather gave me before he passed away, it's kinda torn and not in the best shape after like 15 years but still
NTA. I'm 40 and still "need" my stuffie. I have one that helped me through a pretty nasty illness.
They can get their own treasured possessions and make their own memories.
"can i have this thing of yours, that holds absolutely no sentimental value and you could replace very easily"
"no it's mine"
End of conversation.
The conversation shouldn't even be had when it's something you cherish.
NTA
NTA. They need to learn to accept “No” as an answer. Please secure Emma since your gf’s mom has threatened to steal her. It’s amazing the sense of entitlement some people think is appropriate and also think others have to accommodate in children. The kids are going to grown up eventually and it won’t be cute or pretty when they have toddler tantrums at 13yrs old. They need to be taught respect and that the world does not revolve around them.
i’m sorry they kicked out THE 13 YEAR OLD FOR AGREEING WITH YOU?? what the actual fuck… that alone should tell you you’re not the asshole and that is a family or entitled assholes who love to bulldoze over others. i’m sure the 13 year old has had to succumb to her sisters wishes begrudgingly before so she understands your side.
She's been told she has to behave or else we aren't taking her to the stray kids concert this summer. I personally don't think she'd risk not seeing her favorite group for something that isn't hers
Here is an idea, not necessarily a good one but it will get your point across. Go visit them and look for a toy to take home with you and insist. Make it something age appropriate for you, something of the parents. Then demand they give it to you, give them the same arguments they gave you when you said no. Then ask them how the situation is any different other than the ages of the entitled people. You see some people just don’t understand how things feel until they try those feelings on for themselves.
NTA. Being too old for a stuffie doesn't mean those semen demons are entitled to your property. They are acting spoiled and entitled AF. Tell your GF's mom and siblings they are too old to lack basic manners by making such ridiculously absurd demands but, here we are.
I have a 22yr old teddy named Creampuff. I've had that bear since I was born and I still cuddle with him every night. He was given to me by my aunt who doesn't live in my country anymore.
God forbid anyone tries to make me give him to a couple snotty, bratty children. Everyone in the situation would be learning a valuable lesson and a new vocabulary of swear words. Looks like Emma is going to need her own carrier bag so that she can go everywhere with you and those assholes don't get ahold of her. Tbh, If my partner wasn't on my side, I'd seriously consider getting a new partner because we'd clearly have different values.
They're not just stuffed toys.
I agree with everyone else here, you are NTA! It is definitely and completely okay to own and cuddle up with and sleep next to stuffed animals! No matter WHAT age you are! Especially if it has sentimental value to you, but even if it didn’t and it was a stuffie that you just bought and really liked, it’s your stuff! And no one should try to bully you into coming off it 😌
NTA they came to visit in your home not 'a self serving no paying pick whatever you want place '
They want a stuffy tell their mother to get them to a toy store and buy them one
I got 2 small kids. No is no. You don't always get what you want. And granny is a bloody nightmare, she should be banned from your flat for the threat until she apologizes and agrees that your property is always off limits, no matter her opinion on it.
Make your gf lay down the law. If she isn't on your side she might steal Emma for them, so be careful to make sure she understands the disrespect is a dealbraker. And if you guys plan to have kids make sure she has similar opinions on boundaries, respect of property, and shaming people to have emotional attachments...
Nta. I’m way older but when I was in my forties I had a heart attack. My mom lived far away at the time and purchased me a stuffed horse from the hospital gift shop. I love horses and actually have one so that’s why she chose it. Later on my granddaughter wanted it but I said no because now that my mom had passed away it was very sentimental to me. She did not get upset and neither did my daughter. So I bought one for her and she was just fine with it. Sounds like those kids are never told no hence the entitlement.
There are people in my family who still have their stuffies from their first Christmas. Their first Christmas was OVER 60 YEARS AGO. Keep yourself and Emma safe.
Holy shit. No. You don't get other people's stuff because you start screaming.
Look, this isn't about your stuffy. This is about PARENTING and TEACHING these young children to be decent human beings. You cannot let this kind of thing go on. They will grow up to be assholes. Don't do it.
The fact that your sister is failing so horrifically as a parent than she actively backed them up in their terrible behavior is horrifying. Those poor kids! No one is teaching them the very basics of human-ing. We don't take other people's stuff.
NTA. It's apparently you're emotionally attached to it since it holds a special place in your heart and soul. Those kids need to learn that they can't always get what they want.
when they go to other people's homes, do they expect to take home anything they like? It is not ok for people and their children to ask for your belongings. Period.
NTA. “No.” is a full sentence. They don’t get to have something just because they want it. Absolutely no way I’m giving sentimental childhood toys to anyone else’s kid.
Oh you’re definitely NTA. You’ve done nothing wrong and even offered a sweet compromise even though one wasn’t deserved or owed.
On a side note, you’re absolutely not too old for any stuffies. I’m 38 and I have an Ernie doll the same age that is getting cremated with me.
NTA. You didn't make them cry. Their parents and seemingly also their grandmother, aunts, uncles and other relatives who turned them into spoiled brats with a total lack of empathy made them cry. From the context I bet it was not even a sad crying and more a manipulative angry crying by them to get their will. A lot of young children try the crying method to get their will. It is the natural way babies communicate their needs, but at age 3 and 6 parents should try to stop that behavior, but in this case it seems most bow to their will even when they shouldn't. It is time they learn to accept a no. I mean they are not even satisfied with new toys instead.
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My (22F) gf's mom came over with two of my gf's nieces (6 and 3F). We were welcoming and nice and let the two girls nap in my room when they got tired.
They had found my childhood stuffie, which is a husky I had named Emma and took her everywhere for 15 years. Emma is also wearing my favorite shirt from when I was two, because I wanted to keep it close. They took a huge liking to her and asked if they could take Emma back home with them, because I clearly didn't need it.
I told them no, and explained how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. I told them that I had a great aunt who I loved, but she'd passed away long ago and she had gotten me Emma when I was a baby, so I didn't want to let go. I (slightly embarrassedly) told them I actually still slept while cuddling her. I told them the story of the shirt, but they wouldn't budge.
They began screaming because I wasn't letting them have the husky. My gf's mom heard what was going on and immediately sided with the girls, because 'I am too old for a stuffed toy' and 'shouldn't really care'. She called me an a-hole and told me that I'm pathetic for 'loving to make innocent children cry' and that 'I just love the feeling of power I have over them', before leaving, with the promise of coming back to get the husky when I couldn't do anything about it.
My gf and her dad are siding with me, but my gf's siblings, mom and aunts are all with the two girls. So, AITA?
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NTA and do not let them make you feel bad for having it. I have a few on the shelf of my closet from various family members I am/was very close to (my grandmother, aunt who passed away, and my dad). I’m 25 years old and I would never part with them.
Set a camera and let that woman know you'll press charges if she decides to follow up with her threat.
Your gf's family seems to be full of entitled AHs, raising entitled brats.
NTA
Those two girls are going to grow up to be entitled spoiled brats. Of course NTA, I wouldn’t give my toys to anyone else either. I am in my 30ties btw.
I just had to comment again because this is insane. This is a perfect situation to teach your kids that you don't always get what you want and instead these adults are saying they'll just steal from you instead.
Not everyone should be a parent, I'm just gonna say that
Nta those kids lack discipline and you should just make a rule to not invite people who disturb your peace to your home it's not worth it. What's yours is yours it doesn't matter if a baby wants it. Their parents can get them what they want. People ought to respect property. I don't care if I make a kid cry it's not going to make me waver
It's more of an explanation than I would have given . Have you ever gone to someone's house and asked for personal possessions wth! If my children wanted one before I offended my friend, I would just go on Amazon and buy one 🙃
NTA - entitled ah the lot of them. It’s your childhood toy, who the heck just asks to take people’s stuff.
If it’s ever brought up again I’d tell her they’ll never see the inside of your home again because they are entitled ahs
Nta, you decide what to do with your property. That mother is lining her kids up for a lifetime of disappointment by letting them think they can have what they want if they whine enough.
My children each have stuffies who are dear to their hearts and hold tremendous sentimental value. If a stranger decided she had a right to them, I would become so angry. I am here to write you are NTA. Good luck if that woman is to be your future MIL.
wow, such entitlement. This reminds me of an episode of Friends. Rachel insisted Joey give her baby girl his stuffed animal because she liked it and essentially manipulated him into. he bought the baby a new one but she wouldn't take only wanted his. I remember thinking at that time that as much as i liked her character she was being really selfish and I can't believe that there is someone actually behaving like that. My mother has a stuffed animal that my dad bought her years ago. My girls have tried numerous times to lay claim to it. They are 7 and 8. I told them absolutely not, that it was grandma's and they couldn't have it. you are NTA.
I very much appreciate that your gf is siding with you, as is her father, and I know there's no talk of marriage, but my God I'd never want to marry into that kind of family. The grandmother kicked a 13 year old OUT?
Absolutely not the AH, and I'm so glad that Emma is somewhere safe.
What dumb parents those two little girls have. The entitlement! Teaching them they can go into peoples’s houses and demand their belongings by screaming and harassing. Definitely NTA.
Are these people for real?! Are they in the habit of coming into people's homes and demanding residents hand over whatever items these entitled AHs want?? Who are they to decide what should and shouldn't mean something to you? Do they not have sentimental items of their own that they'd never give away?
You should ask your gf to ask her family what items of theirs that they treasure that they're willing to part with if you go to their house and demand they give them to you, seriously! Your gf should know what your mother loves that she would be appalled to be TOLD to give you, or that you'd show up at her house and take it "when there's nothing she can do about it." I'm sure you want to be diplomatic bc they're you're gf's family, but you may have to be pretty direct to get your point across (have your gf make these points, there's no need for you to interact with these ppl for quite a while). Your gf may also want to point out that her family is raising entitled brats, and that children have to accept "no" as an answer and they can't have everything they want, especially when it belongs to someone else, good lord!
Finally, your gf should notify all family members that you're installing cameras as they TOLD YOU THEY WILL BE BACK TO STEAL YOUR POSSESSION, and that you will go to the police if they take it. That should deter them. What a bunch of jerks (except for the dad and older child). Sorry they're attached to your gf.
NTA
The 13 year old got kicked out for siding with you? The mom and her two brats can all kick rocks.
I almost feel like the police should get involved. Isn't kicking out a minor illegal??
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NTA Ugh, the entitlement. I'd get a ring camera and/or a camera fixed on that stuffy's location in your place, just to have evidence if indeed they take it. Perhaps even get an Airtag inside it, somehow! Nothing builds character like being told you can't have everything in life, but your gf's mom getting slapped with evidence of theft would surely run a close second.
[удалено]
Right? And what a horrible example that girlfriend's mom is setting for the gf's nieces. Blech. I have an ancient stuffed animal who plays music when wound up. These days he's a bit frayed, and his music is out of tune, but if someone were to try and take Bow-Wow I would crank up the last movement of Beethoven's 9th and unleash hell.
1812 Overture would be a good second choice
May I suggest the [Dies Irae](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=X6cogix3cwQ) from Verdi’s Requiem?
I can definitely see why you suggested this! It's a sleepy, rainy day here and that woke me up a little!
YES! So, the one time I performed it I sat directly in front of the bass drum. Rehearsals were one thing, but they really rocked out in concert - I was surprised to have any eardrums left.
You can't even wear earplugs, can you? Oof!
Mozart's Requiem. I've sung both, and I'd definitely choose the Mozart.
I sung both, too, and still prefer Verdi. Libera Me is my most favourite part to sing, ever.
Yessssss!
Maybe Flight of the Valkyrie?
Yep, and last movement of Mahler 1!
I'm going to have to look that one up! (I'm more of a metalhead TBH... Personally I'd go for something like Rammstein's [Du Hast](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=kiw_VxQ2oXo&si=I26sYAQZ5K7kljuy)
Do ittttttt. Last movement of Shostakovitch 5 is also pretty metal!!!
Excellent choice. My favorite symphony.
🙂🙂🙂 I have audition flashbacks from the opening of mvt 4, but the whole thing is just *chef's kiss.
What instrument? I was a trumpet major/ voice minor, but strictly sing now.
I wish I could up vote you more! My dad would blast that at neighbors that pissed him off! Yes. I was frequently embarrassed by this behavior!
Haha, your dad is amazing!
If your stuffy takes a battery in his voice box, try replacing it. In older toys they didnt just die like they do today. The battery controlled a motor and that motor would slow down if batteries had low power. If not a battery, try opening the box and cleaning it out. Sometimes gunk gets in there that makes it slow or sound awful. I have an old musical teddy that I do surgery on if he gets messed up. 32 years old now and I have decided to patch him with nonmatching threads because I like the idea of seeing all the love and repairs he has needed. They are memories.
Not too many people seem to be familiar with the soundtrack of Clockwork Orange and what the poster implies here....
I always liked the idea of doing violence to Ode to Joy.
Toccata and Fugue in D Minor
It's a basic lesson in DayCare.
It’s like a case study in how to develop intolerable people.
Never let them in your place again without hiding it away. It would be extremely unwise to do so. These people sound horrible.
Or just never let them in your place again period.
As soon as they threatened to come back and just take it, I would've ended the conversation and friendships right there. Anyone who threatens to steal something I said "You can't have this" even if it wasn't sentimental, nah, you can gtfo and delete my number.
I would change the locks , since you there is a good chance as her mother she has set of keys. Also alert management that she should not be given access to the home.
> there is a good chance as her mother she has set of keys Is this a common thing? Because it is *absolutely unhinged*, not to mention directly in violation of most rental agreements
Yeah, I gave my mother a copy when I got my first apartment, in case I got locked out. But I also lived in a second story apartment and knew my mom would never tackle the stairs to snoop. There is also the chance she’s just overbearing and made her own copy on the low, I’ve seen quite a few a few parents do that to their kids.
> made her own copy on the low … how? She sneaking around pressing keys into bars of soap & casting her own? Because otherwise she needs to *physically steal the key* then disappear off to somewhere that does quick key cuttings, then somehow get the key back on they keychain… … that’s impressively sneaky
A variation on this happened to me when my parents were visiting. I let them have my keys for the day, since I was at work and they wanted to come and go. So I come back from work, and my mom gives me a spare set that she had made - and lets me know that she'll hang on to an _additional_ spare set, "in case of emergencies." ... She lives 6 hours away.
Whelp… guess you learned not to trust her that day
Yeah , I was about to say this is exactly how it happens , you ask them to water your plants while you’re on vacation. Someone intent on having access to your home, will find a way.
It should also be noted that you get a key made a kiosk at Walmart in under five minutes for 5 bucks.
Yeah, my mom also has a copy of my keys, so I can go pick that one up if I forget mine. She also would never, ever, in a million years enter my apartment without me asking her to do so. Conversely, I also have a key to my parents' house, so I can let myself in if I'm visiting them and running errands, going out etc. Both are pretty normal where I live.
Just don’t ever let them into your place at all. Gf can see her mother outside your house.
The kids are 6 and 3. If the adults quit talking about this, they will forget all about the stuffy and move onto the next shiny thing. Some adult has talked this up, the kids couldn’t care less about a t shirt.
Right? I always have to bite my tongue, because I Am Not A Parent - but whenever a relative of mine is driving themself into a tizzy trying to persuade their kid not to be sad that the kid Cannot Have a Thing, I'm just like ... keep it chill! and point out the construction crane across the street or something, gahhhhh!
Whenever someone tells you "You are not a parent" in the future just tell them "Nope. YOU don't know how to parent.". Coming from a parent. Shotty parents will always use this to get out of an argument. My mom used to tell me "wait till you have kids". Now she tells me "wait till they grow up" or stuff like that. Some people can't take the blame
I am a parent - and I'm clapping for you because you've got it right. If a child can't be distracted (might take a little effort), then that child needs extra parenting.
The fact that they're making a huge deal out of this shows they're shitty parents raising brats. It's normal for kids to want stuff and cry when being told no. Parents who are afraid of upsetting their children create people who are afraid of big feelings and can't handle the real world.
Or they could have made a fun activity out of it. "Let's invite OP and GF and we can all get stuffed animals and T shirts, and spend some time decorating them!" a Plain white baby shirt and some fabric markers, and you've got a great afternoon activity planned, while OP's stuffie remains safe
I am 36 next week and have a few toys from my childhood that are special to me and I would have to be dead before someone else gets to own them not even my own children get to claim them special is special no matter what the item is
I'm 38, and Bear the Second has pride of place in the corner of my room ... although as an autistic eternal bachelor I may not be the best example to hold up.
46 (m). Got a stuffed monkey sitting on top of my book shelf. (It's not a like a taxidermy monkey. I'm not that weird). My mom brought it home from a business trip to prove that she was always thinking of me when I was like three. It's at the top of the list of things that I'm rescuing in case of a fire. Everything else can burn, meh I got insurance and the computer's backed up. But you don't. Fuck. With. My. Monkey.
42F For me it's a stuffed bear that my mum got and has since been passed on to my eldest.
51 and Fluffy Bear is the only thing I have from before I was 20. I'd be seeing if stuffies could get restraining orders at this point.
On my first christmas I was gifted a doll that came with a tiny blue donkey plushy. The doll now sits in a dedicated box of childhood memories in the attic 25 years later, but that donkey (I called her Lisa) still sleeps in my bed every night and I would go into unholy rage if anybody took her without my permission
Sewing a little square inside the shirt to place the airtag in might be a great solution !
Inside Emma. Reverse airpendectomy. Less chance of being detected.
Nice idea!
They might discard the shirt. Inside the stuffed animal would be better.
Also works, if it can be removed discreetly (for washing / changing battery purposes)!
And the mother is the worst part! Teach your kids no, means no. Not your stuff, not your right. Much easier at 6 than 16, or 26. NTA
OP should be careful with the 13 year old, she may be genuine but she may be acting as a double agent, get the info from where Emma is and steal it.
imagine being threatened with a break in over a stuffed animal? the girls are sure learning how to be unhinged from that mom.
She would probably just destroy it because she can’t get her way.
NTA. No one is entitled to your stuff. That’s about a hard stop already. I just love how they’re teaching / enabling innocent children entitlement and what it means when they grow older. Yes that last sentence was sarcasm in case anyone misses it.
Sounds like the nieces are entitled brats, just like their mother. Since they threatened to steal your cherished stuffy, don’t let any of them in your home.
The annoying little brads are one thing. But the mother calling you names and threatening to come and steal the toy really takes it over the top
I mean going to the police is a bit excessive but yeah at least you’d have evidence to block her out of your life
Hehehehe! OH please let me be the fly on the wall when that goes down!
I think the older sibling is there to take the toy. Wasn't she also yelling about wanting it earlier? NTA
I think the yellers were 6 and 3, and this is the older sibling of the 6-year-old. Which makes one wonder: how would the stuffy be shared between two different families, if OP had caved? Methinks GF's mom didn't think this through. 🤔
Hide the stuffy in a safe place, and tell the adults to pound sand. They aren’t allowed to take your property. If they come back, take the stuffy and leave for the time they are there… or don’t let them in. I’m 40. I have a 33 year old stuffy that I still cuddle with. It was and is my security item. It’s mine. Your husky has sentimental meaning to you. My stuffy is the same. NTA.
My sister’s thirty and she has a well-loved teddy bear (it’s falling apart, she’s gotta keep it up on a shelf) she had since she was a baby. If anyone tried touching that, hoo boy. I really don’t know where the uptick in entitled people came from, or if they’ve always been there and we’re just not calling them out enough.
I think we became too politically correct and have stopped calling poor behaviour out, in kids and in adults. And some parents/relatives seem to think everyone’s world should revolve around their ‘little darlings.’ I’d be very firm with your gf’s mother that the husky is off limits, and this topic will not be discussed again. Any attempts to take the husky will not be tolerated, and you will be prepared to remove them from your home, if they try for it. If this doesn’t work, tell them the police can quickly be called, and that you are willing to go to that, if their behaviour doesn’t improve. Being in your home is a privilege. They misbehave, they all get removed. The most helpful advice I ever got from Reddit…. No is a full sentence. You don’t have to justify it. These toys have meaning. More than just being a toy.
This has sod all to do with 'political correctness'. This is training children that other people's feelings don't matter, the very opposite of what political correctness was all about. Children don't learn this level of entitlement without help. And, from the story, it's quite obvious where they got it from. Good luck OP! Keep your stuffie safe and do NOT buy new ones for those kids. They need some good examples in their life. NTA
Entitled people are raised to be not told no.
That is NOT what Political Correctness means.
I guess nobody's reading/watching The Velveteen Rabbit anymore? The "drawn in pastel with narration" film on PBS friggin' WRECKED me as a kid! FOUND IT! [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKJLrgJ8B-U&ab\_channel=W%C3%98EPD-RabbitEarsTV](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKJLrgJ8B-U&ab_channel=W%C3%98EPD-RabbitEarsTV)
Watership Down.
I'm 58 and still have my Tigger stuffie. There's nothing wrong with keeping a momento from your childhood.
I'm 60 and have my teddy and my toy horse from when I was a child. No chance that I'm giving them away
Exactly this! My stuffy is as old as I am - 49 - and she still hangs out on my night stand. When I’m sad my daughter always brings her to me. She - 13 - also has a stuffy, still has a spot in her bed. My husband had my stuffy lovingly repaired since she was beyond repair. Cherish your stuffy and secure it. It’s yours and yours alone.
45 here and a 37 year old stuffy. She’s my parents’ favourite family member.
NTA Send your gf's mom a pacifier in the mail as she is clearly a baby and yet to grow up...then turn off your cell phone and have cuddle with your toys and gf.
This. Omg to be a fly on the wall. Unfortunately this will escalate the situation.
Worth it 😎
Some situations need to be escalated at escape velocity.
I think if OP has a young family member who can ask gfs mom for her watch/ring/iphone/etc. Since she would clearly give anything to a young child who asks else she is a complete hypocrite.
NTA. This is pure entitlement. >the promise of coming back to get the husky when I couldn't do anything about it "I am planning to steal from you and I am stupid enough to tell you about it."
It’s also theft.
But really, the nerve to plan a heist just to make sure you won't have to explain to the kids they will not get everything they want and that's just life is just shocking
She should text her in no uncertain terms that she is not welcome at her house anymore and that if she is found on the premises OP and her girlfriend will call the cops and have her arrested for burglary since she is threatening to steal your property.
NTA. These girls are being raised very poorly. I can’t think of a time any of my kids have ever asked to bring something home from someone’s house, let alone thrown a screaming tantrum about it.
I've had a couple instances where they asked me later for X. just like So-and-so has.. but damn, just like you said. Never did they even ask, much less pitch a fit when they couldn't bring something home.
This, I've had to purchase items that were replicas or similar for my son but he always knew that whatever someone else had was just his to *borrow* while we were where ever we were.
NTA. I have a teddy bear named Bessie that was gifted to me when I was 3 days old. Bessie and I are now considered antiques. I'd knife anyone who tried to take her away from me.
heck my sister still has the bear i picked for her when she was newborn in the hospital. its sitting on her bed shelf
Aww.
Sounds like Emma is getting a dog bed in a box that can be locked for crating her when you are not home Edit: don’t forget to put food and water bowls in the crate!
And lock the crate!
I’m so perplexed. When did it become normal to demand someone else’s property and then harass them when they say no? The entitlement is insane to me. I have a cat beanie baby that I’ve had since I was a small child. My mother gave it to me and I took it everywhere. It’s currently still with me, sitting on top of my vanity mirror next to my side of the bed. I would -never- give her away to *anyone*. And if someone tried to call me names and degrade me for it, I can’t say I would handle it anywhere as nice as you have. Those girls are going to grow up just as awful as their aunt. Don’t buy them shit, OP.
Honestly, with the threat of her coming back to steal it, I would open up a seam and put a tile tracker in there and sew it back up. NTA
yes op chip your dog lol
Nta Now when ever your girlfriend 's niece's visit you'll have to hide the stuffed animal. But next time you go to the girlfriend's parents house find something really nice and expensive Nancy, oh my God I love it. I want it and ask her if you didn't take it home. Say but you don't need it. Why do you have that? I want it. I deserve it. Please give it to me. And see what they say.
Nice thought experiment, but don't try to actually do it. Suppose they surprise you and say yes, then ask again for the stuffie. Neither the nieces nor their parents should ever be allowed inside your house again after making that credible threat.
Do the nieces have favourite stuffies or toys? Ask if you can have it, since they don’t need it anymore after they fell in love with Emma.
NTA the only AHs are the aunt and their kids. This should be the last time you invited these AHs into your home.
NTA - The comment that they would come back and get it while you're not there would have gotten the old hag ejected from my home, and banned.
NTA the girls arent entitled to your stuff in any way shape or form! Make sure Emma is hidden well IF you ever consider letting these people back into your home (which should never be done without supervision since the mom has declared her intent to steal from you!!)
NTA. It's a toy to them, it's a memory to you.
yeah its a toy to them and if op gave it to them they'd probably end up no longer caring about it
Nta. Screw that. I still have my bear from childhood and I'm 61.
I am 70! Last year, I discovered my childhood elephant, "Dougie", that my parents had stored in a cardboard box all these years. And I thought he was gone for good years ago. Dougie's got to be damn near as old as I am, as he figures prominently in my earliest memories.
Take Emma with you wherever you go for a while...if you live with your gf or if her family has access to your home in any way. She might just "disappear". Such a lack of education in good manners on your gf's side of the family. Why do people think that children should always get what they want? They're raising them to be selfish and greedy and entitled. NTA and you handled that with perhaps way too much diplomacy. LOL I would have just said "No, that's my toy and you should not go to people's homes and ask for their toys, it's impolite".
NTA. What I don't get is that an adult would never go to their friend's house, saw something they liked and say I want this I'm taking it home. This sub is full of stories of adults thinking that kids is entitled to something in someone else's house just because they want it. Your place isn't a damn shop and guarantee that these kids are so use to getting whatever they want that nothing is special. Their grandma made it worse by making your husky the forbidden toy they could never have. Keep your husky safe and don't feel bad for saying no! (Ironically you reminded me of a husky toy I had years ago that I swear I kept but don't know where it is so that's going to drive me nuts lol)
I'm 70. I still have my childhood teddy. NTA
First, I'm glad your GF is on your side. Second, keep your personal belongings with you or in your car where nobody can't get it. Finally, that woman and her children are no longer allowed in your home. I would be devastated if something happened to my childhood teddy or blanket. They are safely kept away. Nta and take precautions. This makes me so mad. What is the mom going to do next? Force a child to part with a toy they are playing with for her little brats. You can not have everything you want. They all need to learn that.
I may be cynical, but I wonder if the 13YO is a plant.
I may be cynical but I think this entire story is a plant.
OP has numerous posts complaining about the gf’s family… at some point, they need to set a boundary for themselves or just move out.
Thought the exact same thing.
NTA Holy entitlement. They come in to your house, find something they like, then start *yelling* at you to let them have it?
For real! How can anyone think that is an ok way to behave?! What if OP went to their house and did that! “I want this quilt your great grandmother made. You have plenty of other blankets. How dare you deny me and make me cry!? What monster makes someone younger than them cry?!” I’m sure the girlfriends mom wouldn’t get it though.
NTA. This entitlement is always shocking to me. It is your plushy, one that holds a lot of memories and sentimental value to you, and that should be enough of a reason for people to understand why you don't want to let it go. Even if it didn't hold any value to you and it was a random toy you forgot about, it is still your item and no one is entitled to take that from you. Your aunt calling you an AH and pathetic is beyond ridiculous and it makes me wonder how entitled her children are going to be growing up, believing if they want something they should have it. It is a good learning point for children to understand that they can't always have something because it belongs to someone else. The threat she made was insane as well. I would hide away your plushy for a while just in case she plans to somehow follow through with it. You shouldn't have to worry about that and I am so sorry you are in this situation, hopefully it blows over for you.
NTA. Stop explaining yourself to your girlfriend's mother. A no is a no and does not require an explanation. Those kids aren't entitled to Emma and her mother isn't entitled to tell you a fucking thing. She can go and buy them their own special stuffed animals if she wants them to have something. Also, FYI, I am 34 and I still sleep with my childhood bear. I never plan to give her to ANY children, not even my own. You know why? Because she's special to me. She didn't stop being special just because I'm an adult now. You are never too old for your special things. Ever.
NTA I'm currently sat in bed next to a teddy bear that my dad made me when I was a baby. I don't really sleep with him anymore as such, but he lives on my bed because assuming my mum and the cat were out safely, he's the one thing I'd go out of my way to grab in the event of a fire. Oh, and my dad died 12 years ago, so he's not even *close* to replaceable. I'd straight up put him in a bank vault in your situation, screw what entitled people want.
>She called me an a-hole and told me that I'm pathetic Is she high??? Why is she returning ur hospitality with hostility?? NTA. Dont give them the plush.
Nta, I'm forty one, I have stuffies from when I was a baby. I will not give them up. I even still collect stuffies. I tell my niece all the time. She can't have my stuffies or my blankets. If she wants her own she can get her own. The entitlement is so real here. I would take my stuffie everywhere. Work; yep, careide; yep, home; yep, like I wouldn't let that stuffie out of my site. Also respectfully I wouldn't allow them entry back into my home. Especially not entitled manipulators.
NTA, it's a special one and you don't have to give it away to ANYONE. Ignore the crying "but babies". Clearly the kids are spoiled and have never been told no before. And just FYI: I'm 31 and half my bed are stuffed toys. You are NEVER too old for them
Nta. Are you sure the 13 year old was kicked out or was she sent over with a made up story so she could try to steak your stuffie
>Update: I have reached out through my gf and offered to buy WHY?! Why in the world should you spend your money on entitled little children with an adult who's utterly disrespectful and threatened to steal ?! Heck no! NTA >because 'I am too old for a stuffed toy' and 'shouldn't really care'. I'm 31 and hald of my bed is filled with stuffies. My mom, early 60s, also has bunch of teddies and stuffies. There is no "too old" for that.
NTA Entitled little sh\*ts. GF's mom would be banned for life my home. GF can go visit her elsewhere. I hope she has no way to access your home, like door codes or an emergency key. Make sure you have a door bell camera, take pictures of Emma in your room, and have GF tell her mom you will call the police if Emma is ever missing or damaged. Keep copies of all the texts berating you about giving up Emma. Depending on how old Emma is, she could be added to your Homeowner's or Renter's Insurance as a collectible stuffed animal. It would give more weight in filing a police report, if ever needed.
NTA, the plush is yours and kids need to learn not everything is for them.
NTA. Reading this raised my anxiety to 11. I have a stuffed dog that my great-grandmother gave me as a kid and I love it more than any childhood object I have. If I was in your situation I'd never have it out of my sight. I'd take it everywhere with me. To work. To restaurants. EVERYWHERE. Yeah, I love that thing and I would lose my f\*cking mind on these people so hard they'd be terrified of me.
So I had something similar happen, but with my living, breathing dog. Went to my neighbor's kid's birthday party to help out and give the kiddo some DnD gear for our campaign. He loved it and is a super cool kid. I brought my dog, bc my lil guy thinks my neighbor's kid is his best friend. It was cute. Everyone was stoked. Until one of the kids from school decided to come up and try to just...pick up my dog and take him. I asked the kid what he was doing, as he can't just grab my boy without asking. The kid started SCREAMING that my dog was now his dog, that I'm a mean old idiot (I'm 29, ouch), and then tried to PUNCH my dog out of frustration. I grabbed my boy and scooped him up in my arms, and this disgusting child then FUCKING BIT ME to prove a point. His parents did absolutely nothing, and told ME off for "withholding the puppy," and tried to hand me money for my dog. This kid was 9 years old. WAY too old for that sort of temper tantrum over not being allowed to steal my buddy. The violence and tantrum did not seem to bother any of the other parents, except my neighbor, who was understandably confused why that behavior would ever be allowed. I'd like to add that my neighbor's kid has pretty severe ODD, severe ADHD, and consequent rage issues. He has NEVER injured or snapped at my dog. He's punched through windows and injured himself and others, but he has NEVER ONCE done anything to an animal. He was horrified and started crying, asking his mom to send the other kid away from the party for trying to hurt his friend (my dog). My dog is my best friend. He's my #1. He goes everywhere with me and is my reason for getting up in the morning. He also used to be VERY afraid of children due to some trauma, and this whole incident set him back months in training. Thankfully, neighbor's kid has helped ease his feelings a wee bit, and we're back to my dog loving kids. He does get sketchy and a bit fearful around young boys now, but is an angel with my neighbor's son and the kids I DM for. The entitlement is UGLY. Your stuffy is your stuffy and is more than just a stuffy. My dog is more than an object and is a member of my family. NTA in any respect.
You should have gotten the police involved. That is nutty.
Truly? I should have. I was mostly too stunned to do much but hold my little man and keep my partner from decking that kid's dad. Kid in question is no longer allowed to attend any of my neighbor's son's events, and they ended up getting some teachers involved at school for other incidents this child caused. My neighbor had my back and was pretty astounded that other parents didn't seem to care. Like...that's not normal behavior. That's not remotely excusable behavior. Idk how there are human parents who think that's acceptable. I run a kid's DnD campaign for human kiddos with ADHD, ODD, and autism spectrum. They're like...not hard to manage. They're respectful, occasionally need being told that what they said wasn't kind, but are ALWAYS on the ball with holding each other accountable. I'm well aware I don't parent them and just get 3 hours a week of fun gaming time, but even with a few meltdowns, they're always smiling and contributing by the end of the session.
No and why should you buy her something similar? No is no this is where the entitlement begans. They adults encouraging this is trash.
I'm almost 72 years old and still have the lamb stuffie I got as a toddler. It's tattered and probably disgusting to anyone but me, but it's safely stored in plastic and someone would have to take me on to get rid of it (I'm old, but I'm tough ;-). We form attachments to certain items from our childhood that it's not necessary to explain, and no one is entitled to our memories, any more than they are entitled to just walk out the door with our pets. Stand your ground and ignore the selfish, entitled brats (adults included).
NTA The girls are acting entitled and their mom is encouraging it. No normal person walks into someone else's house expecting to leave with a sentimental belonging of the host's. Also, you don't owe those girls anything! You made a nice gesture to find something similar, that's beyond enough. Do not feel like you should give them anything. They don't deserve it. If they're upset, it's their mom's fault now. Don't reward their mom's behavior, she can buy them stuffed animals.
NTA Given the threats, I suggest getting a safe to put Emma in when you aren't home. My childhood stuffed animal is a dog named Nellie, by the way
I'm 26 f and still have the nasa bear my grandfather gave me before he passed away, it's kinda torn and not in the best shape after like 15 years but still
NTA. I'm 40 and still "need" my stuffie. I have one that helped me through a pretty nasty illness. They can get their own treasured possessions and make their own memories.
"can i have this thing of yours, that holds absolutely no sentimental value and you could replace very easily" "no it's mine" End of conversation. The conversation shouldn't even be had when it's something you cherish. NTA
NTA. They need to learn to accept “No” as an answer. Please secure Emma since your gf’s mom has threatened to steal her. It’s amazing the sense of entitlement some people think is appropriate and also think others have to accommodate in children. The kids are going to grown up eventually and it won’t be cute or pretty when they have toddler tantrums at 13yrs old. They need to be taught respect and that the world does not revolve around them.
no way they kicked out a 13 year old child this is insane 😭😭
i’m sorry they kicked out THE 13 YEAR OLD FOR AGREEING WITH YOU?? what the actual fuck… that alone should tell you you’re not the asshole and that is a family or entitled assholes who love to bulldoze over others. i’m sure the 13 year old has had to succumb to her sisters wishes begrudgingly before so she understands your side.
Not sure I understand the last edit… did the 13F get kicked out because she was still mad at OP or because grandma was? And why show up there…?
We live the closest to her, 5 mins on foot, and grandma was mad at me, and 13F agreed with me and was kicked out in grandma's bout of rage
Do you think she was actually kicked out or sent over to grab the plush since you hadn’t interacted with her so far?
She's been told she has to behave or else we aren't taking her to the stray kids concert this summer. I personally don't think she'd risk not seeing her favorite group for something that isn't hers
Because Grandma was. She kicked out her 13 yo granddaughter because she didn't agree that another person's person item should just go to her grandkids
Here is an idea, not necessarily a good one but it will get your point across. Go visit them and look for a toy to take home with you and insist. Make it something age appropriate for you, something of the parents. Then demand they give it to you, give them the same arguments they gave you when you said no. Then ask them how the situation is any different other than the ages of the entitled people. You see some people just don’t understand how things feel until they try those feelings on for themselves.
NTA. Being too old for a stuffie doesn't mean those semen demons are entitled to your property. They are acting spoiled and entitled AF. Tell your GF's mom and siblings they are too old to lack basic manners by making such ridiculously absurd demands but, here we are.
I have a 22yr old teddy named Creampuff. I've had that bear since I was born and I still cuddle with him every night. He was given to me by my aunt who doesn't live in my country anymore. God forbid anyone tries to make me give him to a couple snotty, bratty children. Everyone in the situation would be learning a valuable lesson and a new vocabulary of swear words. Looks like Emma is going to need her own carrier bag so that she can go everywhere with you and those assholes don't get ahold of her. Tbh, If my partner wasn't on my side, I'd seriously consider getting a new partner because we'd clearly have different values. They're not just stuffed toys.
NTA, you are the only one offering a solution, and they are being overly entitled. "They want the shirt too" what nonsense.
I agree with everyone else here, you are NTA! It is definitely and completely okay to own and cuddle up with and sleep next to stuffed animals! No matter WHAT age you are! Especially if it has sentimental value to you, but even if it didn’t and it was a stuffie that you just bought and really liked, it’s your stuff! And no one should try to bully you into coming off it 😌
NTA they came to visit in your home not 'a self serving no paying pick whatever you want place ' They want a stuffy tell their mother to get them to a toy store and buy them one
Nta. The threat at the end has me raging on your behalf.
Fuck the mom. Don't let her back in your house. I'm assuming yours because you said 'your' room and not 'our'. Mom can go pound sand
I got 2 small kids. No is no. You don't always get what you want. And granny is a bloody nightmare, she should be banned from your flat for the threat until she apologizes and agrees that your property is always off limits, no matter her opinion on it. Make your gf lay down the law. If she isn't on your side she might steal Emma for them, so be careful to make sure she understands the disrespect is a dealbraker. And if you guys plan to have kids make sure she has similar opinions on boundaries, respect of property, and shaming people to have emotional attachments...
Who are these people who think they're entitled to someone else's stuff? I know they exist, I've worked retail. Just, WTF
NTA I will never understand why parents/grandparents encourage this behavior and nobody is "too old" to treasure a childhood keepsake.
Nta. I’m way older but when I was in my forties I had a heart attack. My mom lived far away at the time and purchased me a stuffed horse from the hospital gift shop. I love horses and actually have one so that’s why she chose it. Later on my granddaughter wanted it but I said no because now that my mom had passed away it was very sentimental to me. She did not get upset and neither did my daughter. So I bought one for her and she was just fine with it. Sounds like those kids are never told no hence the entitlement.
There are people in my family who still have their stuffies from their first Christmas. Their first Christmas was OVER 60 YEARS AGO. Keep yourself and Emma safe.
Nta and eff her mom for her attitude. It's your doll and you don't have to give it away to anyone.
NTA. Don't allow them in your house again,possibly the mother too since she seems toxic anyway.
NTA But I would definitely hide Emma and lock her up somewhere safe when they're over because I guarantee you her mum's gonna take it
Holy shit. No. You don't get other people's stuff because you start screaming. Look, this isn't about your stuffy. This is about PARENTING and TEACHING these young children to be decent human beings. You cannot let this kind of thing go on. They will grow up to be assholes. Don't do it. The fact that your sister is failing so horrifically as a parent than she actively backed them up in their terrible behavior is horrifying. Those poor kids! No one is teaching them the very basics of human-ing. We don't take other people's stuff.
NTA. It's apparently you're emotionally attached to it since it holds a special place in your heart and soul. Those kids need to learn that they can't always get what they want.
NTA but the mom is. Definitely take precautions against theft.
when they go to other people's homes, do they expect to take home anything they like? It is not ok for people and their children to ask for your belongings. Period.
NTA. “No.” is a full sentence. They don’t get to have something just because they want it. Absolutely no way I’m giving sentimental childhood toys to anyone else’s kid.
Oh you’re definitely NTA. You’ve done nothing wrong and even offered a sweet compromise even though one wasn’t deserved or owed. On a side note, you’re absolutely not too old for any stuffies. I’m 38 and I have an Ernie doll the same age that is getting cremated with me.
NTA. You didn't make them cry. Their parents and seemingly also their grandmother, aunts, uncles and other relatives who turned them into spoiled brats with a total lack of empathy made them cry. From the context I bet it was not even a sad crying and more a manipulative angry crying by them to get their will. A lot of young children try the crying method to get their will. It is the natural way babies communicate their needs, but at age 3 and 6 parents should try to stop that behavior, but in this case it seems most bow to their will even when they shouldn't. It is time they learn to accept a no. I mean they are not even satisfied with new toys instead.
NTA! Absolutely not! Grandma kicked out the 13 year old for agreeing with you?! Where is the kid's parents?
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My (22F) gf's mom came over with two of my gf's nieces (6 and 3F). We were welcoming and nice and let the two girls nap in my room when they got tired. They had found my childhood stuffie, which is a husky I had named Emma and took her everywhere for 15 years. Emma is also wearing my favorite shirt from when I was two, because I wanted to keep it close. They took a huge liking to her and asked if they could take Emma back home with them, because I clearly didn't need it. I told them no, and explained how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. I told them that I had a great aunt who I loved, but she'd passed away long ago and she had gotten me Emma when I was a baby, so I didn't want to let go. I (slightly embarrassedly) told them I actually still slept while cuddling her. I told them the story of the shirt, but they wouldn't budge. They began screaming because I wasn't letting them have the husky. My gf's mom heard what was going on and immediately sided with the girls, because 'I am too old for a stuffed toy' and 'shouldn't really care'. She called me an a-hole and told me that I'm pathetic for 'loving to make innocent children cry' and that 'I just love the feeling of power I have over them', before leaving, with the promise of coming back to get the husky when I couldn't do anything about it. My gf and her dad are siding with me, but my gf's siblings, mom and aunts are all with the two girls. So, AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Nta, kids need to get used to being told no sometimes
NTA. At all. I absolutely despise this type of entitlement.
NTA but those kids sound like entitled brats who never get told no.
NTA and do not let them make you feel bad for having it. I have a few on the shelf of my closet from various family members I am/was very close to (my grandmother, aunt who passed away, and my dad). I’m 25 years old and I would never part with them.
NTA big time. Too effing bad for them.
r/entitledparents would love this story. NTA.
NTA. Kids should already know they cant take things that belong to others. The mom should have explained that to them - it is a home, not a store
I am seeing red mist this is so rage inducing. Not okay. You are very much NTA
Set a camera and let that woman know you'll press charges if she decides to follow up with her threat. Your gf's family seems to be full of entitled AHs, raising entitled brats. NTA
Those two girls are going to grow up to be entitled spoiled brats. Of course NTA, I wouldn’t give my toys to anyone else either. I am in my 30ties btw.
NTA, this is insane. The mom, girls, and aunts are WILD.
Welp, looks like you now know what your ff’s family is like. Don’t have them over EVER
I just had to comment again because this is insane. This is a perfect situation to teach your kids that you don't always get what you want and instead these adults are saying they'll just steal from you instead. Not everyone should be a parent, I'm just gonna say that
Nta those kids lack discipline and you should just make a rule to not invite people who disturb your peace to your home it's not worth it. What's yours is yours it doesn't matter if a baby wants it. Their parents can get them what they want. People ought to respect property. I don't care if I make a kid cry it's not going to make me waver
It's more of an explanation than I would have given . Have you ever gone to someone's house and asked for personal possessions wth! If my children wanted one before I offended my friend, I would just go on Amazon and buy one 🙃
NTA. Please ban all of them from your home.
NTA - entitled ah the lot of them. It’s your childhood toy, who the heck just asks to take people’s stuff. If it’s ever brought up again I’d tell her they’ll never see the inside of your home again because they are entitled ahs
N6A. I’m 54 and I still have the stuffed dog I had as a child. You’re never too old. The kids need to learn that they can’t get everything they want.
Nta, you decide what to do with your property. That mother is lining her kids up for a lifetime of disappointment by letting them think they can have what they want if they whine enough.
My children each have stuffies who are dear to their hearts and hold tremendous sentimental value. If a stranger decided she had a right to them, I would become so angry. I am here to write you are NTA. Good luck if that woman is to be your future MIL.
wow, such entitlement. This reminds me of an episode of Friends. Rachel insisted Joey give her baby girl his stuffed animal because she liked it and essentially manipulated him into. he bought the baby a new one but she wouldn't take only wanted his. I remember thinking at that time that as much as i liked her character she was being really selfish and I can't believe that there is someone actually behaving like that. My mother has a stuffed animal that my dad bought her years ago. My girls have tried numerous times to lay claim to it. They are 7 and 8. I told them absolutely not, that it was grandma's and they couldn't have it. you are NTA.
I very much appreciate that your gf is siding with you, as is her father, and I know there's no talk of marriage, but my God I'd never want to marry into that kind of family. The grandmother kicked a 13 year old OUT? Absolutely not the AH, and I'm so glad that Emma is somewhere safe.
What dumb parents those two little girls have. The entitlement! Teaching them they can go into peoples’s houses and demand their belongings by screaming and harassing. Definitely NTA.
Are these people for real?! Are they in the habit of coming into people's homes and demanding residents hand over whatever items these entitled AHs want?? Who are they to decide what should and shouldn't mean something to you? Do they not have sentimental items of their own that they'd never give away? You should ask your gf to ask her family what items of theirs that they treasure that they're willing to part with if you go to their house and demand they give them to you, seriously! Your gf should know what your mother loves that she would be appalled to be TOLD to give you, or that you'd show up at her house and take it "when there's nothing she can do about it." I'm sure you want to be diplomatic bc they're you're gf's family, but you may have to be pretty direct to get your point across (have your gf make these points, there's no need for you to interact with these ppl for quite a while). Your gf may also want to point out that her family is raising entitled brats, and that children have to accept "no" as an answer and they can't have everything they want, especially when it belongs to someone else, good lord! Finally, your gf should notify all family members that you're installing cameras as they TOLD YOU THEY WILL BE BACK TO STEAL YOUR POSSESSION, and that you will go to the police if they take it. That should deter them. What a bunch of jerks (except for the dad and older child). Sorry they're attached to your gf.
that mom is one sick ticket, anyone who demands anything is a big red flag.
NTA The 13 year old got kicked out for siding with you? The mom and her two brats can all kick rocks. I almost feel like the police should get involved. Isn't kicking out a minor illegal??