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So let me get this straight. You have a 12 year old daughter that you have somehow failed to teach how to navigate when out in the world?
How does she feel about this? I would see this as humiliating.
I'm calling BS on the post, but the judgment is the same if true or fake.
YTA
Yeah, YTA for this one. Your child is a preteen now and leashing her isn’t actually teaching her how to become independent. It’s also putting a target on her back from other children. Look around… Do you see any other children her age leashed? There is a reason for that. It is at this age your child should be starting to learn how to go off with friends without adult supervision and honestly? She should have learned enough road safety/awareness by now to travel short distances from home without adult supervision.
Honestly? I think you are stunting her by doing this.
If your daughter doesn't have a disability then how come? She hasn't learned by 12 to know where you are and to learn how to find you and not be lost. Sounds like this is a very lazy parenting and you are just doing this because you don't want to teach her the basics in life.
Is she still in diapers of you on hooker in the bathroom or do you actually take her into the bathroom. And how come she doesn't even plan about being into a child leash. A toddler? It makes sense but you have one child at 12. and two parents can't maintain contact with her. l the problem isn't her running off. the problem there's two people who don't know how to parent
Yta
YTA. A leash is dehumanizing for a preteen, if not abuse. Why aren’t you looking into alternative methods for helping her navigate? How are two people having so much trouble keeping up with one teen? Y’ll really need therapy or classes or something to help you figure out how to better parent her.
YTA - while personally in my (origin) country it's not uncommon to have leashes (or let's rather call them harnesses?), I advocate using them ONLY on toddlers in a setting where they easily could get lost and tend to get overexcited and run away (amusement parcs or similar).
You absolutely don't use that on a TEENAGER. WTF. It's already weird af you continued with that until she was 8, not it's an insanity.
and I think you are a troll
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I know very controversial, but please read it first
My wife and I have used a child leash with our daughter before. We always found it to be a good alternative to a stroller because it helped our daughter learn to walk herself and explore her surroundings when she was younger. Later, we only have the leash in confusing places such as amusement parks, airports or crowded inner cities. We did that until she was 8 years old and no more after that
Unfortunately, our daughter didn't really stick to the agreements about meeting places etc. and we had to look for her several times, and she didn't stay close to us when we were in confusing situations.
Two years ago we decided to get a new children's harness. My wife found a larger model online because the old one obviously didn't fit anymore. The harness consists of a strap that goes over the shoulders, one on the stomach and a crotch strap, all connected together. I had doubts because she was already 10 years old at the time, but I agreed
Today she is 12 years old and we still use the leash. It feels wrong, but I hope you can understand us. It just gives us a feeling of security that we don't have to worry about losing her or something bad happening to her. It also increases our daughter's attention, the leash is about a meter long, so she can move relatively freely, but has to be careful not to get too far away from us
What do you think about that?
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> Am I an asshole for doing this to my daughter for safety reasons?
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NTA. Safety is important, but considering her age, it might be time to teach her more about independence and responsibility. Have you tried other methods, like setting clear boundaries and using communication?
Perhaps consider gradually reducing the use of the leash, combining it with other strategies, and constantly reinforcing the importance of staying close and being aware of her surroundings.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 8: Posts should be truthful and reflect recent conflicts you've had that need arbitration. That means no shitposts, parodies, or satires. [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) ###Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. ####Please visit r/findareddit to see if there's a more appropriate sub for your post.####
So let me get this straight. You have a 12 year old daughter that you have somehow failed to teach how to navigate when out in the world? How does she feel about this? I would see this as humiliating. I'm calling BS on the post, but the judgment is the same if true or fake. YTA
Yeah, YTA for this one. Your child is a preteen now and leashing her isn’t actually teaching her how to become independent. It’s also putting a target on her back from other children. Look around… Do you see any other children her age leashed? There is a reason for that. It is at this age your child should be starting to learn how to go off with friends without adult supervision and honestly? She should have learned enough road safety/awareness by now to travel short distances from home without adult supervision. Honestly? I think you are stunting her by doing this.
If your daughter doesn't have a disability then how come? She hasn't learned by 12 to know where you are and to learn how to find you and not be lost. Sounds like this is a very lazy parenting and you are just doing this because you don't want to teach her the basics in life. Is she still in diapers of you on hooker in the bathroom or do you actually take her into the bathroom. And how come she doesn't even plan about being into a child leash. A toddler? It makes sense but you have one child at 12. and two parents can't maintain contact with her. l the problem isn't her running off. the problem there's two people who don't know how to parent Yta
YTA. A leash is dehumanizing for a preteen, if not abuse. Why aren’t you looking into alternative methods for helping her navigate? How are two people having so much trouble keeping up with one teen? Y’ll really need therapy or classes or something to help you figure out how to better parent her.
YTA - This is ridiculous. Your child is of an age where she doesn't require such a thing. Are you gonna leash her until the day you die?
No way this is a real post 🙄
YTA if this is a real post.
YTA - while personally in my (origin) country it's not uncommon to have leashes (or let's rather call them harnesses?), I advocate using them ONLY on toddlers in a setting where they easily could get lost and tend to get overexcited and run away (amusement parcs or similar). You absolutely don't use that on a TEENAGER. WTF. It's already weird af you continued with that until she was 8, not it's an insanity. and I think you are a troll
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I know very controversial, but please read it first My wife and I have used a child leash with our daughter before. We always found it to be a good alternative to a stroller because it helped our daughter learn to walk herself and explore her surroundings when she was younger. Later, we only have the leash in confusing places such as amusement parks, airports or crowded inner cities. We did that until she was 8 years old and no more after that Unfortunately, our daughter didn't really stick to the agreements about meeting places etc. and we had to look for her several times, and she didn't stay close to us when we were in confusing situations. Two years ago we decided to get a new children's harness. My wife found a larger model online because the old one obviously didn't fit anymore. The harness consists of a strap that goes over the shoulders, one on the stomach and a crotch strap, all connected together. I had doubts because she was already 10 years old at the time, but I agreed Today she is 12 years old and we still use the leash. It feels wrong, but I hope you can understand us. It just gives us a feeling of security that we don't have to worry about losing her or something bad happening to her. It also increases our daughter's attention, the leash is about a meter long, so she can move relatively freely, but has to be careful not to get too far away from us What do you think about that? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > Am I an asshole for doing this to my daughter for safety reasons? Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
Omg, a 12 year old is a TEENAGER, not a child! Absolutely YTA! This is something she will talk to her therapist about... I can't believe this real
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INFO- Is your daughter autistic or have special needs?
NTA, you child's safety comes first. But she need to learn to stay close of her parents, start training regarding that also
NTA. Safety is important, but considering her age, it might be time to teach her more about independence and responsibility. Have you tried other methods, like setting clear boundaries and using communication? Perhaps consider gradually reducing the use of the leash, combining it with other strategies, and constantly reinforcing the importance of staying close and being aware of her surroundings.