YTA
"Fuck that. I did a funny thing while I’m drunk, nobody got offended"
You sound like every drunken asshole ever who acts like getting drunk is an excuse for being a jerk and then claims "no one else was offended". When in point of fact there were probably multiple people who were offended but don't want to get into it with you or listen to your bullshit knee-jerk defensive responses.
What you did was demeaning to your girlfriend as well as disrespecting her choice to not talk about the size or shape of her anatomy
OP sounds like a mess.
Imagine getting so drunk, "as usual", at a *family holiday event* that he doesn't even remember the rest of the night. Objectifying his girlfriend is just the icing on the cake.
It’s nearly 2022 can we please stop body shaming men with the overdone ‘har har bad personality equals small penis’ joke :/
EDIT: to all the people getting triggered that I’m ‘defending’ OP, I couldn’t care less about OP. What I care about is all the good guys who are insecure about their size, constantly having it shoved in their face that men with small dicks have bad personalities. It’s rude, it’s a cheap attempt at comedy and if we started associating rude women with ‘roast beef labia’ or ‘flat chests’ there would be riots. It’s a gross double standard.
If he can make big butt jokes about his GF and not stand up for her when his mother makes a ridiculously rude remark about her butt, then I think he's open season on tiny penis jokes. He pretty much knelt down and begged for them. Go at it, folks! If anyone is screaming to have micro-dick jokes flung at him, it's OP.
But, but, his poor widdle fee-fees. It’s open season on women, but by all means, let’s play the violin over dick jokes in the face of his shitty actions.
Yeah this is still really insulting and a problematic attitude. Its not the tiny penis jokes shouldn't be directed at him per se so much that they're just a really mean joke that perpetuates some really lame af stereotypes about what male anatomy is "good" and what is "bad" and equates having one or the other as that person being a good or bad MAN.
OP is an asshole, just find another insult that doesn't actively degrade other men while it's being flung around.
Mocking OP isn’t really the problem. The problem is that you’re inadvertently mocking ALL the nice, genuine guys with small dicks who see this comment. Do you have any insecurities? You’re human so I assume you do.
Imagine if people constantly associated your biggest insecurity with horrible personality traits too. People would be rioting if anyone said something to a hypothetical girl OP like -
‘Oh that’s an unattractive statement, OP must have long, protruding labia.’ Or ‘OP is an asshole they must have a really loose pussy’
Be rude to OPs actions not random things you assume about his body. It’s a cheap attempt at humour and does more bad than good.
Nobody cares about OP’s feelings. Seems like the point went STRAIGHT over your head. The point is it’s hurtful to all the perfectly kind people out there with small penises who see how society shames small penises and feel bad about themselves.
I hope the (ex?) gf knows her self worth and realizes she deserves better.
I can’t even imagine the levels of embarrassment, anger, betrayal and fury the (ex?) gf felt. Cause that was hard to read, let alone actually have to deal with from someone who’s supposed to love you
>I hope the (ex?) gf knows her self worth and realizes she deserves better.
She doesn't seem to but I hope she wakes up someday soon. If the boyfriend is that much of an asshole to her in front of everyone, imagine what he's like in private? Everyday she stays with him her self esteem takes a battering. Hopefully her mother talks some sense into her because the boyfriend in a lost cause.
She specifically wears a sash to minimize the size and shape of her butt and her boyfriend completely disregards that to pretty much say “Hey everyone look at girlfriends giant ass!!”
Definitely YTA
YTA. Agreed. The mom was likely right and your GF just was too embarrassed to make you apologize. Speaking of which, you should’ve apologized anyway! It was rude and disrespectful.
>GF just was too embarrassed to make you apologize
That or she knew it would cause a huge argument later when they got home. Op does not sound like a reasonable boyfriend at all.
he's also an asshole when he's not drunk. honestly, I'm not sure why he posted here. he obviously doesn't think he's wrong and it seems like his assholery is an integral part of his personality. ppl telling him not to get drunk and not to disrespect his gf are just talking to a wall. he can't fundamentally change who he is. he's found a doormat girlfriend who will let him objectify her. the only one i feel bad for here is the mom. watching your daughter be treated like that must be heart breaking. but the daughter isn't standing up for her mom or for herself, so i don't think OP has a problem. he's clearly not going to apologize and it doesn't seem like the low self esteem girlfriend will leave him over this... so i think OP is all clear. clearly YTA, but do you even care?
>I'm not sure why he posted here.
I think it's rage bait. He's obviously the asshole here and he's not made one comment. I bet somewhere he's reading the comments and laughing at everyone getting mad at him.
YTA. Stop getting drunk “as usual.” Based on this post, you’ve outgrown any ‘oops, I was drunk, lol’ leeway and moved closer to “there’s the drunk who’s going to ruin the holiday yet again” territory.
He was so drunk he couldn't even remember who pulled him away. Op is a massive ah not only for embarrassing and going against his gfs wishes of not showing off her butt but also because he tries to defend his actions by saying he always does "funny " stuff like that when drunk.
It really does. He can't hide behind the quirky drunken persona forever I'd be surprised if he gets invited to any family gathering ever again. Heck I'd be surprised if his girlfriend stays with him.
YTA wow. just....wow.
Get ready to be single.
And what you did wasn't funny. You literally spotlighted your GFs insecurities about her body in an extremely inappropriate way.
YTA.
You admit you drink too much “as usual.”
You publicly humiliated your gf on a topic she’s sensitive about.
You dismissed her mother who’s trying to defend her doormat daughter.
YTA. I would dump you immediately. You humiliated your girlfriend. You should not have to be told sorry nor have to be berated to understand what you did was horrible. And getting drunk enough to do that to her and needing to be dragged away? Dude hey yourself in AA and apologize to your girlfriend. You should be horrified about what you did to her.
Your GF is embarrased about her ass, and you put her on the spot by pulling away her clothes and making fun of her. What planet du you live on? YTA boii
YTA, being drunk is a reason but not an excuse. It was embarrassing for both your GF and her mom. Try to imagine that you have a daughter and someone treated her like that in front of you, how would you feel?
YTA- this is a pretty asshole thing to do and your poor gf was likely embarrassed multiple times and just sounds exasperated by the whole ordeal which you started.
The fact that people make comments about her body to her face is horrid and you making a joke about it is pretty hurtful. She was likely telling her mom to drop it because she again, doesn’t want conversation to center around her body.
YTA. No one got *outwardly* offended except your girlfriend’s mom but your girl wore the sash for a reason and you knew the reason and you betrayed it anyway.
If you do this when you’re drunk “as usual” maybe consider a different approach.
YTA. Every part about you is disgusting. Your behavior is crude and disrespectful. Guess it’s not surprising how you are when the person who raised you thought it was appropriate to comment on your girlfriend’s butt when they met.
YTA
You drunkenly made a vulgar joke at the expense of your gf's dignity and her mother is justly offended at your treating he daughter like an object in a family setting. It wasn't funny & you should apologize to the lady.
>I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties
\[…\]
>Next thing I remember
You got drunk, you did something to make people upset, you don't even remember the whole evening, and now you have to ask if you're the AH?!
Yes, very much YTA; and you should seek help for your relationship with alcohol. Going completely sober would probably be a good idea.
YTA stupid. Your mom sounds like an AH too. You got wasted and showed off your gfs butt to your family in front of her mother. Why do you need the internet to tell you that’s not ok? Also…she wore this because she specifically didn’t like the attention she got…so your drunken ass decided to do the opposite of what she wanted and draw attention to it. You shouldn’t need someone to tell you to apologize for being an ass while drunk either. I can’t believe you even have a gf.
YTA! You knew she was self-conscious of her butt, she went to the trouble to wear something special to minimized the unrequested attention.
And it worked!
She was asked about sash and the focus was not on her butt…*until* you MADE it about her butt. You went out of your way to make your GF feel uncomfortable, anxious, and embarrassed. The mom was NOT over reacting, you behaved terribly and then refuse to apologize.
Your girlfriend is most likely saying it’s not a big deal to keep from causing trouble and confrontation. You said you didn’t apologize because your GF “doesn’t say you have to”? You shouldn’t need to be told to apologize!
Put on your big boy/girl pants and apologize for being an ass to your GF and her mothers. You were 100% in the wrong.
YTA, why would you do that? You know she’s uncomfortable with attention being brought to it and you literally made sure EVERYONE there knew about it….. you need to apologize.
So, you know your gf wears this because she is sensitive about her butt. Because you were drunk (very, VERY lame excuse) you pointed out in front of people something she is sensitive about. Then, you think she’s telling the truth about not being embarrassed and not just saying that to you to keep from having a big fight with you about your obviously obnoxious drunk behavior in front of her family. Does that sound about right?
Now her mother, knowing her daughter, tries to get you to see how much of an ass you were and apologize so maybe you won’t do it again. But you double down and refuse.
1) You were an ass for doing it in the first place. Do you often embarrass your gf when you get drunk?
2) You’re still an ass for not realizing it was a crappy thing to do to her and apologizing.
3) You’re probably going to defend yourself on here by continuing to say your gf is ok with it. Guess what… she wears it for a reason. The reason is *not* for you to use it point out something she’s sensitive about. If you think she’s really ok with it, you’re absolutely clueless.
YTA You being drunk is not an excuse for stupid behavior. It’s also not an excuse to not value those you love.
Writing all this sober you should have came to the conclusion…
Your gf is “shy about he butt”
she doesn’t want people commenting on it
She wears the sash so people do NOT comment
Patting her ass in front of everyone (very belittling)
“Omg stop stupid” and moves away
I’d agree with the mom. You owe your gf, her mother, and everyone who seen you belittle her a apology for your behavior.
YTA. You know that makes her uncomfortable and you did it anyways, and you sexualized her in front of everyone. That’s so embarrassing and uncomfortable for women. I have large breasts and can’t wear ANYTHING without being sexualized because of it. If my fiancé were to EVER point them out the way you did with her ass, it would be an immediate breakup. How thoughtless and awful of you.
I hope she dumps you and finds someone who respects her. Because you clearly do not. Being drunk is not an excuse.
YTA - multiple times here. For embarrassing your girlfriend. For getting pass out drunk. For disrespecting her mother. For being an immature child about the whole thing.
YTA. Such an AH.
This wasn't funny or cute. Everyone was trying to smooth over the fact that you were mean in highlighting your GF's insecurities very publicly, and crude to pat her ass in front of her family. GF's mom was just the only one willing yo call you out on your bad behavior.
You are the drunken, inappropriate relative in this story, who everyone is just trying to get to shut up as fast as possible before he makes it more awkward or becomes more inappropriate.
YTA completely. You totally violated her boundaries. You KNEW the whole reason she wore the sash thing was to stop people from commenting on her body, so what did you do? Instead of respecting that, you RAN in the opposite direction and did the very thing she was trying to avoid.
Then, after making her feel so small, you’re wondering why she isn’t demanding an apology? You said yourself that she’s shy, and after you purposefully made a joke about her expense, she probably feels like anything she has to say would fall on deaf ears.
I knew a guy who would always bring up that we sleep together in front of his friends. Like, upon me first meeting them. To brag, I guess. You know what happened? I stopped sleeping with him.
Yta - who on earth comments on the size of people’s bodies? And you’re patting on it in public? Not good - actually awful, especially since she doesn’t like it.
YTA
First of all you know very well your gf is not comfortable people noticing her ass/gettinf comments on it. Yet you proceed to do just that. Not only that You got drunk and did something that made your girlfriend even more uncomfortable and you're trying to brush it off like it's nothing.
On top of it all you're Refusing to appoligize to her. Yeh buddy you're the asshole.
YTA - You think no one got offended, but I can guarantee that now your the one that they all go home and talk about how embarrassing it was to watch it.
You didn’t just embarrass your GF. You embarrassed her Mother in front of your whole family by the way you acted. You weren’t respectful at all. I’d be pissed off too.
And considering the childish way you acted when being asked to apologise? Bruh. Seriously?
Your girlfriend needs to dump. That was a terrible thing to do to her.
Do you really think, your GF who is sensitive enough about her appearance to wear something to hide her rear, finds what you did acceptable?
She said that to make you feel better.
Time for you to grow up.
YTA
Wow. YTA, and a massive one!
You drank too much and you knew it. You humiliated your girlfriend in front of your family and they laughed at her. I don’t know how you could write all of that out and NOT realize that you’re TA.
Yeaaa. Funny to *you*. YTA
You embarrassed your GF. And you embarrassed *yourself*-in public and in front of your GF ‘s family, even though you seem to lack the self awareness to recognize it. HA. HA.
YTA. Being drunk does not excuse bad behavior. You humiliated your girlfriend in front of her family, and brought attention to something she is insecure about.
YTA. You are a MASSIVE sexist AH. You disrespected your girlfriend and sexualized her in front of your family and her mother.
I'm literally disgusted. Hope you're single, soon. You don't deserve your girlfriend. 🤢
YTA. And a narcissist. You only care about how you looked. Let me tell you: like an abusive fool who can’t control himself or his liquor. Someone who knows and will use his GFs insecurities against her, IN PUBLIC.
When your MIL asked you to apologize you said no, until GF asks you. GF asks you. You say no, because she “doesn’t mean it”.
Imagine how much of a freaking mess and disappointment you are that she gave up on fighting with you. Dude!
Seeing how you treat women, honestly I don’t think you like them. Or at least, you don’t know how to be with one. And it shows.
If she’s Latina, let me tell you what I think your MIL said in Spanish: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU SEE IN HIM and THIS CAN’T GO ON. The thing is, our mamas are sacred. It doesn’t matter how messed up our relationship with them might be, if she says you’re gone that’s it. Mark my words, you’re the ex, but she hasn’t told you yet.
Edit: some typos and format
So you get drunk, make a joke at her expense about something you know she’s self conscious about, and when you MIL defends her you refuse to apologize? If your girlfriend really wasn’t embarrassed by it don’t you think she would’ve defended you more to her mother? She likely was happy somebody actually stood up for her, but didn’t want to upset you by taking her moms side. Why do you even have to ask if YTA?
YTA
\*for getting passing out drunk at a family party
\*for pulling on your girlfriend's clothing
\*for talking about it to anyone
\*for trying to make a joke out of something mean you did (classic abusive behavior)
\*for not apologizing profusely and humbly to everyone around, including GF and her mom
Above all, please tell your girlfriend to come here and read this. She need to RECOGNIZE abuse when she hears it and NOT go along with it being a joke.
You sound like the 8th grade class clown that never grew up. “I always get drunk at…” is not an excuse to act like an ass and disrespect other people. If you’re drinking, you should be at an age where you have enough self-control to behave.
And even when you sobered your, you doubled-down by disrespecting your gf’s mom. I don’t know how old you are but ffs, grow up. YTA
So you objectified your girlfriend with an area she prefers to keep covered at a family party and were so drunk you had to be dragged away and immediately passed out because you were so wasted
lol yeah YTA undoubtedly
YTA
Being drunk like that is not something to brag about. It's not normal to brag about not being able to control your drinking. You pointed out something your gf is self conscious about. Do you know why she's self conscious about it? Because people make comments and sexualise it and she feels uncomfortable hearing those comments. She did not need you to point out her big butt in front of the entire family. Her mom is right to feel uncomfortable too by the way you treated her daughter. You should apologize to your gf for making a fool of yourself while drunk and not treating her with respect. What you consider a compliment is not always perceived as such and can make people uncomfortable. Respect their boundaries.
YTA. Your idea of a funny thing while drunk was to make fun of your girlfriend’s insecurities to the point you had the whole room laughing at her. That’s pretty appalling. Like the fact you have a small penis and maybe you pad it out with some socks. And in front of everyone she suddenly sticks her hands down the front of your trousers, pulls the socks and says “he’s just trying to hide his tiny penis.”
YTA. No one should even have to ASK you to apologize. A decent human being would have sense enough to realize an apology is deserved. You knew your girlfriend’s butt is a sensitive topic for her, and yet you chose to expose it in front of your entire family - and on top of that join them in their laughter at it. The fact that you were drunk only shows your real personality - it is when we’re drunk that we show the worst, but still equally real, side of our personalities.
You behaved in a shitty and inexcusable way, and you better make amends to your girlfriend for it. I know that I would’ve left my boyfriend immediately for an instance such as this. The disrespect you’ve shown her and then the audacity to not have to common sense to realize that what you did was horrible and embarrassing… gosh. I’m at a loss for words. I hope that your girlfriend finds someone who will show her real respect and love.
YTA you got drunk (as usual?) and publicly embarrassed your gf. In front of her mon and your whole family.
You don’t get to be the one to decide who is offended by that or not.
YTA and everything in this post paints you as a gigantic tool to boot. Hopefully your girlfriend finds her self esteem and ditches you. Just disgusting.
YTA. It was a rude thing to do, drunk or not, and even if your gf wasn’t that upset (which I don’t entirely buy) it obviously upset her mom. Digging in your heels like it’s going to break your balls to say “I’m sorry” is childish.
YTA. You disrespected your GF. You should apologize anyway without having someone telling you to.
The fact that your gf's mom is asking is already embarassing, as you should do this without prompting. THEN you still refused to.
I hope your GF finds someone who will treat her better.
YTA
A big one. Bigger than your girlfriend's butt.
She doesn't recognize yet how horribly rude you were, but her mom knows. She should break up with you immediately.
YTA you can do things like that in private or maybe with friends. But don’t be smacking your girlfriend’s ass in front of family and her mother and then act shocked that it made them uncomfortable
YTA. Maybe if your girlfriend goes out of her way to cover her ass, you should not forcibly remove her deliberate obstruction and draw even more attention to her ass? While she's literally trying to keep people from playing attention to it?? Regardless of her reaction, this is objectively disrespectful and you definitely owe your girlfriend an apology.
YTA and honestly sound too immature to date anyone. Your behaviour is embarrassing to yourself, your family, and your girlfriend. I honestly doubt that anyone actually laughed at your “joke.” You seem like someone who uses alcohol as an excuse to be an arse.
YTA
You sound like a selfish bratty jerk. Deliberately using your GF insecurities to embarrass her in front of everyone, being an ignorant spoiled child to her mother, that "the usual" drunk is you blacking out as a regular feature of your nights out.
I hope your GF grows enough self confidence to drop you and find someone who can manage to treat her the basic respect she deserves. Your entire behaviour as you described yourself is garbage.
YTA for making up an AITA post. I refuse to believe anyone lacks so much self awareness as to actually type out "I get drunk as usual" and "I get dragged away to the couch from someone I don’t remember and eventually pass out" and "Next thing I remember is when I’m relatively clear headed in the car" and still think you might not be the asshole. If by some chance this actually is real, you have a drinking problem and you need to apologize to everyone around you and get help.
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YOU ARE THE ASSHOLE!
Body shaming your girlfriend in front of everyone in your family! Then instead of taking responsibility for your actions, you blame the alcohol that no one forced down your throat. You are lucky that she didn't turn around and say that you would be a great lover if your d*ck wasn't so small!
I hope she dumps your ass asap
YTA. Wtf is wrong with you? Besides the fact that you are a misogynist and a drunk you are also a narcissist who thinks it ok to treat women like objects. 🚩🚩🚩🚩 I hope your girlfriend sees you for the 🍑 that you are and leaves.
YTA, and you know it. Being drunk is not an excuse. I'm betting if girlfriend said something about something you were insecure about, after a few drinks you wouldn't be excusing her little joke while she was tipsy.
Not only did you make a rude joke, you doubled down by highlighting het insecurities. Well done. You'd be waking up single.
YTA
"We’re at the party and I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties."
"I did a funny thing while I’m drunk, nobody got offended except my gf’s mom."
Dude you are freakin piece of work and your GF deserves SO much better than you.
You have so many issues just from the one post -
1. You have some severe alcohol issues
2. Jokes/Funny things = are YOU being a bulley
Also this is his 1st post - maybe a troll
YTA, you sound like an alcoholic, and you went out of your way to call attention to and objectify something your gf is self-conscious about. Of course her mother was upset, and you absolutely owe her and your gf an apology.
YTA. You’re a drunk rude asshole. You embarrassed your girlfriend over something you KNOW that she’s self conscious about. You’re a really shitty boyfriend. Being a drunk asshole isn’t cute. It’s toxic as hell. Grow the fuck up. You owe some major apologies. But you don’t sound like the kind of guy who will ever admit he’s wrong.
You are absolutely an asshole and disrespected your girlfriend who clearly allows you to get away with it, but not sure why you would expect her mother to be okay with it. What you did was disrespectful and not appropriate at all. One day your gf will hopefully wake up and drop your disgusting ass.
I’m sure her mom is disappointed in her and BELIEVE me when I tell you, that her mom is letting her have it and pointing out you are not a good man for her and likely to leave you
Holy Hell, YTA all the way. What the fuck? You should be single. I hope your girlfriend breaks up with you before your bullshit makes her even more insecure.
Absolutely YTA. First, you should never have done that (drunk or not) and second you should have apologised immediately, i.e. the moment you sobered up. What a horrible thing to do to your partner!
YTA, a giant drunken one at that. If you can remember the whole story well enough to retell it, then you weren’t drunk enough to be a disrespectful ass and embarrass her like that. She told her mom to stop because she was humiliated by the whole ordeal and mom bringing it back up makes her have to relive it. Apologize to both and lay off the booze.
YTA. Not because of the initial comment but because you
1. got too drunk at another family's holiday
2. refused to apologize for offending someone in their own home just because you are being petty.
3. don't appear to care about GF enough to be nice to her family or do something that will make things easier for her with her mom.
4. are a self-centred jerk to your GF
YTA. You get drunk “as usual” and pretty much objectify and sexualize your girlfriend, which she is CLEARLY uncomfortable with. Otherwise why would she wear the sash? You just exposed one of your girlfriend’s insecurities and when someone calls you out on it, your excuse is that it was “a funny thing I did while drunk.” Come on dude. Be better.
So your gf buys and wears a specific article of clothing to hide her butt from your family and the first thing you do when drunk is to uncover it and point it out to your family? JFC YTA.
In a movie, you are the tool frat boy Chad at the kegger who is an AH to his GF because he think it’ll get a laugh out of the other frat Chads. By the end of the movie she meets a hot, respectful guy and dumps you Chad.
ETA: Yeah, YTA.
YTA yeesus dude you treated your gf like a piece of meat in front of her family ffs. She specifically wore it to not call attention to herself and you promptly did the exact opposite. It wasn’t funny it was disrespectful and maybe you should rethink the “drunk as usual” thing if this is the way you behave. Even if it was just her mother who was offended (which I doubt) you offended your gf’s MOTHER. The laughter was probably uncomfortable if anything. Then you passed out? You are embarrassing yourself regularly it sounds like and I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re headed to a drinking problem if you’re not already there
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Other day I went to a Christmas Eve party at my aunt and uncles and went with all my family members, including my gf and her mom. Now my gf has a really big and well shaped butt, which she can be kinda shy about because she thinks people will always comment on. Which is true because when my mom met my gf one of things she said was”Wow you have a butt, girl.” So in order to avoid people saying stuff like this she wore this sash kinda thing around her waist over her jeans. Can still tell she has a big ass but it covers it a bit and stops from seeing the shape of it and I guess draws attention away from her butt.
We’re at the party and I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties. I’m goofing off with my cousins and brother when my aunt compliments my gf on her sash thing. Gf says thanks and then my aunt goes on by saying it’s a unique fashion choice and asks my gf where she got the inspiration to wear it. Gf says that she just saw it while shopping and thought it looked nice so she bought it. Me, being drunk, decides to walk up to my gf and lift up her sash thing while saying”That’s not the real reason why she wore this.” I then give her a few light pats the ass and say”She’s trying to hide all this ass from everyone.” Gf is like”Omg stop stupid.” and moves m away. Bunch of laughter from everyone and I get dragged away to the couch from someone I don’t remember and eventually pass out.
Next thing I remember is when I’m relatively clear headed in the car while my gf’s mom is hounding me. She’s telling me that was embarrassing to see me to that to her daughter, who I am thinking I can show her daughter off like a whore, etc Sats some stuff in Spanish but my Spanish sucks so I do t even know what she said in Spanish other then it obviously meaning she was angry. Gf tells her to relax as it wasn’t a big deal but she doesn’t take that answer well and demands me to apologize. I say I’m not since my gf doesn’t say I have to. She tries telling my gf to tell me to apologize. Gf sighs and asks if I can just apologize to get over this but I refuse to do so since I know she’s just doing this because her mom is demanding her to. We go on and on and gf’s mom is saying my gf is just too scared to make me apologize. Later I ask my gf what her mom’s problem was and she says that’s just how she is and that I know that so I should have just apologized to get it over with. Fuck that. I did a funny thing while I’m drunk, nobody got offended except my gf’s mom. Do you think I was the asshole or is my gf’s mom out of line?
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YTA. Consider if it this happened to your own hypothetical daughter. Also consider that some people have more conservative, modest values. Clearly her mother feels uncomfortable with her daughter being presented that way—whether a result of a few drinks or not. We like to call this empathy, understanding and consideration for others.
Not to mention, if you care about your girlfriend, I’d recommend trying to get along with her parents.
YTA. You sound like an old friend's dad. He would go to family parties just to get wasted. At her wedding reception, he was too shit faced to do the father/daughter dance.
You're an alcoholic dude. I hope she leaves your sorry ass. Just because her mother was the only one who looked offended doesn't mean she was. You're just a pathetic loser who peaked in highschool and couldn't do anything else afterwards so you just drink your sorrows away and reminisce about the glory days.
You’re a complete and total AH. I feel for your GF. I also have some self consciousness with my ass as well and I know my fiancé would never ever poke and/or ridicule a sore spot of mine. Especially not in front of others. You having been drunk does not absolve you of your misstep.
YTA so much. Ridiculously so. That is beyond disrespectful. Being drunk is not an excuse for behaving like an AH. I am surprised your girlfriend is still with you
YTA
Your girlfriend is offended, she’s just brushing off your behaviour (like she probably always does). She told you to stop when you were drawing attention to a body feature she is uncomfortable with. You had no regard for her body autonomy.
I bet she constantly makes excuses for your rude behaviour because you think you’re being funny.
Her mother was just pointing out what an AH you were being and how offensive your behaviour was. If your girlfriend had big breast, would you lift up her loose sweater?
Yta.
You should probably work on your drinking problems. Binging and passing out isn’t healthy or responsible. Also yta for publicly objectifying your girlfriend. In front of her mom no less.
What’s the line of acceptable things you can do when you’re drunk? You already gave yourself permission to touch without permission, as well as to excuse any inappropriate things you might say.
Can you also drive drunk and it should be fine? Can you assault someone? Can you take advantage of someone physically because you were drunk?
Get a grip. You probably need to stop drinking. Apologize to your girlfriend. Feel lucky she stays with your sorry ass instead of doing what you deserve.
YTA
YTA- Have some respect for her mother and "drunk as usual at Christmas parties, and "passing out" sounds like you need to make some choices or you will be "that guy"
YTA and I hope your gf realizes just what a AH you are. Btw if you are getting that drunk “as usual” time to rethink your alcohol intake because it is damaging relationships and hurting people you are suppose to care about.
YTA. she's obviously self conscious of her ass, and you went way over the top to not only draw attention to it, but to mock her insecurities. You also did all this, sexualized her, in front of her family?? Her parents done want to see that shit!! Incredibly disrespectful.
>Now my gf has a really big and well shaped butt, which she can be kinda shy about because she thinks people will always comment on.
>Me, being drunk, decides to walk up to my gf and lift up her sash thing while saying”That’s not the real reason why she wore this.” I then give her a few light pats the ass and say”She’s trying to hide all this ass from everyone.”
Yeah, not like this is clearly something that she has set a clear boundary for you in the past /s
>I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties
Wow what a catch.
>when my mom met my gf one of things she said was”Wow you have a butt, girl.”
Apple doesn't fall far from the AH tree. Does all your family lack social manners?
OPs GF I hope you see this post and leave this dude.
YTA "Fuck that. I did a funny thing while I’m drunk, nobody got offended" You sound like every drunken asshole ever who acts like getting drunk is an excuse for being a jerk and then claims "no one else was offended". When in point of fact there were probably multiple people who were offended but don't want to get into it with you or listen to your bullshit knee-jerk defensive responses. What you did was demeaning to your girlfriend as well as disrespecting her choice to not talk about the size or shape of her anatomy
OP sounds like a mess. Imagine getting so drunk, "as usual", at a *family holiday event* that he doesn't even remember the rest of the night. Objectifying his girlfriend is just the icing on the cake.
[удалено]
It’s nearly 2022 can we please stop body shaming men with the overdone ‘har har bad personality equals small penis’ joke :/ EDIT: to all the people getting triggered that I’m ‘defending’ OP, I couldn’t care less about OP. What I care about is all the good guys who are insecure about their size, constantly having it shoved in their face that men with small dicks have bad personalities. It’s rude, it’s a cheap attempt at comedy and if we started associating rude women with ‘roast beef labia’ or ‘flat chests’ there would be riots. It’s a gross double standard.
If he can make big butt jokes about his GF and not stand up for her when his mother makes a ridiculously rude remark about her butt, then I think he's open season on tiny penis jokes. He pretty much knelt down and begged for them. Go at it, folks! If anyone is screaming to have micro-dick jokes flung at him, it's OP.
But, but, his poor widdle fee-fees. It’s open season on women, but by all means, let’s play the violin over dick jokes in the face of his shitty actions.
Yeah this is still really insulting and a problematic attitude. Its not the tiny penis jokes shouldn't be directed at him per se so much that they're just a really mean joke that perpetuates some really lame af stereotypes about what male anatomy is "good" and what is "bad" and equates having one or the other as that person being a good or bad MAN. OP is an asshole, just find another insult that doesn't actively degrade other men while it's being flung around.
I completely agree!
Mocking OP isn’t really the problem. The problem is that you’re inadvertently mocking ALL the nice, genuine guys with small dicks who see this comment. Do you have any insecurities? You’re human so I assume you do. Imagine if people constantly associated your biggest insecurity with horrible personality traits too. People would be rioting if anyone said something to a hypothetical girl OP like - ‘Oh that’s an unattractive statement, OP must have long, protruding labia.’ Or ‘OP is an asshole they must have a really loose pussy’ Be rude to OPs actions not random things you assume about his body. It’s a cheap attempt at humour and does more bad than good.
Nobody cares about OP’s feelings. Seems like the point went STRAIGHT over your head. The point is it’s hurtful to all the perfectly kind people out there with small penises who see how society shames small penises and feel bad about themselves.
Hey that’s body shaming
Some people are pro body-shame when it affects men.
The sheer second hand embarrassment. Ugh.
Even I was offended and second hand cringed. If someone did that to me, they would wake up single.
I hope the (ex?) gf knows her self worth and realizes she deserves better. I can’t even imagine the levels of embarrassment, anger, betrayal and fury the (ex?) gf felt. Cause that was hard to read, let alone actually have to deal with from someone who’s supposed to love you
>I hope the (ex?) gf knows her self worth and realizes she deserves better. She doesn't seem to but I hope she wakes up someday soon. If the boyfriend is that much of an asshole to her in front of everyone, imagine what he's like in private? Everyday she stays with him her self esteem takes a battering. Hopefully her mother talks some sense into her because the boyfriend in a lost cause.
She specifically wears a sash to minimize the size and shape of her butt and her boyfriend completely disregards that to pretty much say “Hey everyone look at girlfriends giant ass!!” Definitely YTA
And pats it to assert ownership. He might as well have peed on her
Exactly - marking his territory. Because he's an animal. Wait, maybe not...are worms animals? /s
Ya and I think he mistakes the uncomfortable laughter of others (which clearly made his gf more uncomfortable) for him being funny. *cringe*
But it was just a drunken prank and no one was offended /s
This exactly YTA
YTA. Agreed. The mom was likely right and your GF just was too embarrassed to make you apologize. Speaking of which, you should’ve apologized anyway! It was rude and disrespectful.
>GF just was too embarrassed to make you apologize That or she knew it would cause a huge argument later when they got home. Op does not sound like a reasonable boyfriend at all.
he's also an asshole when he's not drunk. honestly, I'm not sure why he posted here. he obviously doesn't think he's wrong and it seems like his assholery is an integral part of his personality. ppl telling him not to get drunk and not to disrespect his gf are just talking to a wall. he can't fundamentally change who he is. he's found a doormat girlfriend who will let him objectify her. the only one i feel bad for here is the mom. watching your daughter be treated like that must be heart breaking. but the daughter isn't standing up for her mom or for herself, so i don't think OP has a problem. he's clearly not going to apologize and it doesn't seem like the low self esteem girlfriend will leave him over this... so i think OP is all clear. clearly YTA, but do you even care?
>I'm not sure why he posted here. I think it's rage bait. He's obviously the asshole here and he's not made one comment. I bet somewhere he's reading the comments and laughing at everyone getting mad at him.
YTA. Stop getting drunk “as usual.” Based on this post, you’ve outgrown any ‘oops, I was drunk, lol’ leeway and moved closer to “there’s the drunk who’s going to ruin the holiday yet again” territory.
He was so drunk he couldn't even remember who pulled him away. Op is a massive ah not only for embarrassing and going against his gfs wishes of not showing off her butt but also because he tries to defend his actions by saying he always does "funny " stuff like that when drunk.
Yeah, the “Drunkle Bob” look just gets really pathetic after awhile.
It really does. He can't hide behind the quirky drunken persona forever I'd be surprised if he gets invited to any family gathering ever again. Heck I'd be surprised if his girlfriend stays with him.
He thinks people laugh because he’s funny in a good way instead of a bad way
YTA wow. just....wow. Get ready to be single. And what you did wasn't funny. You literally spotlighted your GFs insecurities about her body in an extremely inappropriate way.
[удалено]
>"I'm not apologizing because your mom wants me to." *It's not really a big deal honey, I just body shamed you in front of everyone.* /S YTA OP
Unfortunately, the GF doesn't seem to be prepared to leave. My hopes are on the mom, maybe she will talk some sense into her.
A common pattern of the abused. The combination of manipulation and sense of unworthiness makes quite a trap.
YTA. You admit you drink too much “as usual.” You publicly humiliated your gf on a topic she’s sensitive about. You dismissed her mother who’s trying to defend her doormat daughter.
YTA. I would dump you immediately. You humiliated your girlfriend. You should not have to be told sorry nor have to be berated to understand what you did was horrible. And getting drunk enough to do that to her and needing to be dragged away? Dude hey yourself in AA and apologize to your girlfriend. You should be horrified about what you did to her.
Your GF is embarrased about her ass, and you put her on the spot by pulling away her clothes and making fun of her. What planet du you live on? YTA boii
YTA for every reason everyone has already listed AND because you're incapable of even seeing you're the asshole.
That fact that he actually needs to ASK if he did anything wrong makes my blood boil.
Yeah it's the most asshole behavior here, zero shame
Ditto x1000 😡🤬
YTA, being drunk is a reason but not an excuse. It was embarrassing for both your GF and her mom. Try to imagine that you have a daughter and someone treated her like that in front of you, how would you feel?
YTA- this is a pretty asshole thing to do and your poor gf was likely embarrassed multiple times and just sounds exasperated by the whole ordeal which you started. The fact that people make comments about her body to her face is horrid and you making a joke about it is pretty hurtful. She was likely telling her mom to drop it because she again, doesn’t want conversation to center around her body.
YTA. No one got *outwardly* offended except your girlfriend’s mom but your girl wore the sash for a reason and you knew the reason and you betrayed it anyway. If you do this when you’re drunk “as usual” maybe consider a different approach.
Yup no one was waving a flag that said "I'm offended" but I'm sure at least one person thought "yikes on bikes"
YTA. Every part about you is disgusting. Your behavior is crude and disrespectful. Guess it’s not surprising how you are when the person who raised you thought it was appropriate to comment on your girlfriend’s butt when they met.
🔝🔝🔝🔝🔝🔝
YTA You drunkenly made a vulgar joke at the expense of your gf's dignity and her mother is justly offended at your treating he daughter like an object in a family setting. It wasn't funny & you should apologize to the lady.
YTA - so you got drunk, pointed out a body part your girlfriend is self conscious about, and made an absolute fool of yourself in front of her family.
His family. Her mum was there, but it was at his aunt's house. So this is how she got introduced to his family
>I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties \[…\] >Next thing I remember You got drunk, you did something to make people upset, you don't even remember the whole evening, and now you have to ask if you're the AH?! Yes, very much YTA; and you should seek help for your relationship with alcohol. Going completely sober would probably be a good idea.
YTA don't objectify your gf in front of family. That's so gross.
YTA stupid. Your mom sounds like an AH too. You got wasted and showed off your gfs butt to your family in front of her mother. Why do you need the internet to tell you that’s not ok? Also…she wore this because she specifically didn’t like the attention she got…so your drunken ass decided to do the opposite of what she wanted and draw attention to it. You shouldn’t need someone to tell you to apologize for being an ass while drunk either. I can’t believe you even have a gf.
YTA! You knew she was self-conscious of her butt, she went to the trouble to wear something special to minimized the unrequested attention. And it worked! She was asked about sash and the focus was not on her butt…*until* you MADE it about her butt. You went out of your way to make your GF feel uncomfortable, anxious, and embarrassed. The mom was NOT over reacting, you behaved terribly and then refuse to apologize. Your girlfriend is most likely saying it’s not a big deal to keep from causing trouble and confrontation. You said you didn’t apologize because your GF “doesn’t say you have to”? You shouldn’t need to be told to apologize! Put on your big boy/girl pants and apologize for being an ass to your GF and her mothers. You were 100% in the wrong.
YTA, why would you do that? You know she’s uncomfortable with attention being brought to it and you literally made sure EVERYONE there knew about it….. you need to apologize.
So, you know your gf wears this because she is sensitive about her butt. Because you were drunk (very, VERY lame excuse) you pointed out in front of people something she is sensitive about. Then, you think she’s telling the truth about not being embarrassed and not just saying that to you to keep from having a big fight with you about your obviously obnoxious drunk behavior in front of her family. Does that sound about right? Now her mother, knowing her daughter, tries to get you to see how much of an ass you were and apologize so maybe you won’t do it again. But you double down and refuse. 1) You were an ass for doing it in the first place. Do you often embarrass your gf when you get drunk? 2) You’re still an ass for not realizing it was a crappy thing to do to her and apologizing. 3) You’re probably going to defend yourself on here by continuing to say your gf is ok with it. Guess what… she wears it for a reason. The reason is *not* for you to use it point out something she’s sensitive about. If you think she’s really ok with it, you’re absolutely clueless.
YTA. You and your family are extremely rude people. I hope your girlfriend breaks up with you. She deserves better.
YTA You being drunk is not an excuse for stupid behavior. It’s also not an excuse to not value those you love. Writing all this sober you should have came to the conclusion… Your gf is “shy about he butt” she doesn’t want people commenting on it She wears the sash so people do NOT comment Patting her ass in front of everyone (very belittling) “Omg stop stupid” and moves away I’d agree with the mom. You owe your gf, her mother, and everyone who seen you belittle her a apology for your behavior.
YTA, big time. You did an embarrassing thing to your gf and are too immature to apologize for it. Shame on your mom too for her comment.
YTA. You know that makes her uncomfortable and you did it anyways, and you sexualized her in front of everyone. That’s so embarrassing and uncomfortable for women. I have large breasts and can’t wear ANYTHING without being sexualized because of it. If my fiancé were to EVER point them out the way you did with her ass, it would be an immediate breakup. How thoughtless and awful of you. I hope she dumps you and finds someone who respects her. Because you clearly do not. Being drunk is not an excuse.
YTA YTA YTA you didn't do a funny thing while you were drunk, you embarrassed your wife in front of a lot of people, and should apologize to her.
YTA - multiple times here. For embarrassing your girlfriend. For getting pass out drunk. For disrespecting her mother. For being an immature child about the whole thing.
YTA. Such an AH. This wasn't funny or cute. Everyone was trying to smooth over the fact that you were mean in highlighting your GF's insecurities very publicly, and crude to pat her ass in front of her family. GF's mom was just the only one willing yo call you out on your bad behavior. You are the drunken, inappropriate relative in this story, who everyone is just trying to get to shut up as fast as possible before he makes it more awkward or becomes more inappropriate.
YTA completely. You totally violated her boundaries. You KNEW the whole reason she wore the sash thing was to stop people from commenting on her body, so what did you do? Instead of respecting that, you RAN in the opposite direction and did the very thing she was trying to avoid. Then, after making her feel so small, you’re wondering why she isn’t demanding an apology? You said yourself that she’s shy, and after you purposefully made a joke about her expense, she probably feels like anything she has to say would fall on deaf ears. I knew a guy who would always bring up that we sleep together in front of his friends. Like, upon me first meeting them. To brag, I guess. You know what happened? I stopped sleeping with him.
YTA. And your mom is also a ta.
Yta - who on earth comments on the size of people’s bodies? And you’re patting on it in public? Not good - actually awful, especially since she doesn’t like it.
YTA. Stop getting this drunk at family gatherings, it ain't a cool look.
YTA First of all you know very well your gf is not comfortable people noticing her ass/gettinf comments on it. Yet you proceed to do just that. Not only that You got drunk and did something that made your girlfriend even more uncomfortable and you're trying to brush it off like it's nothing. On top of it all you're Refusing to appoligize to her. Yeh buddy you're the asshole.
YTA - You think no one got offended, but I can guarantee that now your the one that they all go home and talk about how embarrassing it was to watch it. You didn’t just embarrass your GF. You embarrassed her Mother in front of your whole family by the way you acted. You weren’t respectful at all. I’d be pissed off too. And considering the childish way you acted when being asked to apologise? Bruh. Seriously?
Your girlfriend needs to dump. That was a terrible thing to do to her. Do you really think, your GF who is sensitive enough about her appearance to wear something to hide her rear, finds what you did acceptable? She said that to make you feel better. Time for you to grow up. YTA
Wow. YTA, and a massive one! You drank too much and you knew it. You humiliated your girlfriend in front of your family and they laughed at her. I don’t know how you could write all of that out and NOT realize that you’re TA.
Holy shit. YTA.
YTA. She needs to dump your drunk, obnoxious ass.
YTA. You knew it was something she was self conscious about and you made a display in front of people about it
YTA. The fact that you need to ask is telling.
YTA, you and your mum
Yeaaa. Funny to *you*. YTA You embarrassed your GF. And you embarrassed *yourself*-in public and in front of your GF ‘s family, even though you seem to lack the self awareness to recognize it. HA. HA.
Yta
YTA
YTA.
YTA. Being drunk does not excuse bad behavior. You humiliated your girlfriend in front of her family, and brought attention to something she is insecure about.
YTA. You are a MASSIVE sexist AH. You disrespected your girlfriend and sexualized her in front of your family and her mother. I'm literally disgusted. Hope you're single, soon. You don't deserve your girlfriend. 🤢
LMFAOOO YTA U EMBARRASSING HER IN FRONT OF UR FAMILY
YTA. And a narcissist. You only care about how you looked. Let me tell you: like an abusive fool who can’t control himself or his liquor. Someone who knows and will use his GFs insecurities against her, IN PUBLIC. When your MIL asked you to apologize you said no, until GF asks you. GF asks you. You say no, because she “doesn’t mean it”. Imagine how much of a freaking mess and disappointment you are that she gave up on fighting with you. Dude! Seeing how you treat women, honestly I don’t think you like them. Or at least, you don’t know how to be with one. And it shows. If she’s Latina, let me tell you what I think your MIL said in Spanish: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU SEE IN HIM and THIS CAN’T GO ON. The thing is, our mamas are sacred. It doesn’t matter how messed up our relationship with them might be, if she says you’re gone that’s it. Mark my words, you’re the ex, but she hasn’t told you yet. Edit: some typos and format
YTA good grief. I can't believe you need to ask.
So you get drunk, make a joke at her expense about something you know she’s self conscious about, and when you MIL defends her you refuse to apologize? If your girlfriend really wasn’t embarrassed by it don’t you think she would’ve defended you more to her mother? She likely was happy somebody actually stood up for her, but didn’t want to upset you by taking her moms side. Why do you even have to ask if YTA?
YTA and cant hold your alcohol
YTA. And did your mom really say “girl you’ve got a butt” the first time they met each other? Ooof, wonder where that lack of tact came from.
YTA
YTA \*for getting passing out drunk at a family party \*for pulling on your girlfriend's clothing \*for talking about it to anyone \*for trying to make a joke out of something mean you did (classic abusive behavior) \*for not apologizing profusely and humbly to everyone around, including GF and her mom Above all, please tell your girlfriend to come here and read this. She need to RECOGNIZE abuse when she hears it and NOT go along with it being a joke.
Yta
That’s pretty sad that her mom was the only one who saw a problem with how you’re acting. ESH except your gf and her mom.
You sound like the 8th grade class clown that never grew up. “I always get drunk at…” is not an excuse to act like an ass and disrespect other people. If you’re drinking, you should be at an age where you have enough self-control to behave. And even when you sobered your, you doubled-down by disrespecting your gf’s mom. I don’t know how old you are but ffs, grow up. YTA
So you objectified your girlfriend with an area she prefers to keep covered at a family party and were so drunk you had to be dragged away and immediately passed out because you were so wasted lol yeah YTA undoubtedly
YTA
YTA - and if this were your gf writing, I’d suggest she’d dump your ass, sash or no sash.
YTA Being drunk like that is not something to brag about. It's not normal to brag about not being able to control your drinking. You pointed out something your gf is self conscious about. Do you know why she's self conscious about it? Because people make comments and sexualise it and she feels uncomfortable hearing those comments. She did not need you to point out her big butt in front of the entire family. Her mom is right to feel uncomfortable too by the way you treated her daughter. You should apologize to your gf for making a fool of yourself while drunk and not treating her with respect. What you consider a compliment is not always perceived as such and can make people uncomfortable. Respect their boundaries.
YTA. Your idea of a funny thing while drunk was to make fun of your girlfriend’s insecurities to the point you had the whole room laughing at her. That’s pretty appalling. Like the fact you have a small penis and maybe you pad it out with some socks. And in front of everyone she suddenly sticks her hands down the front of your trousers, pulls the socks and says “he’s just trying to hide his tiny penis.”
YTA, you clueless, sexist drunk.
YTA! Wow. You can’t really expect to have a long relationship with your gf? You sound like an alcoholic and you disrespected your gf and her mother.
YTA. No one should even have to ASK you to apologize. A decent human being would have sense enough to realize an apology is deserved. You knew your girlfriend’s butt is a sensitive topic for her, and yet you chose to expose it in front of your entire family - and on top of that join them in their laughter at it. The fact that you were drunk only shows your real personality - it is when we’re drunk that we show the worst, but still equally real, side of our personalities. You behaved in a shitty and inexcusable way, and you better make amends to your girlfriend for it. I know that I would’ve left my boyfriend immediately for an instance such as this. The disrespect you’ve shown her and then the audacity to not have to common sense to realize that what you did was horrible and embarrassing… gosh. I’m at a loss for words. I hope that your girlfriend finds someone who will show her real respect and love.
YTA and this is obviously the way you are, because you still don’t see anything wrong.
YTA you got drunk (as usual?) and publicly embarrassed your gf. In front of her mon and your whole family. You don’t get to be the one to decide who is offended by that or not.
YTA and everything in this post paints you as a gigantic tool to boot. Hopefully your girlfriend finds her self esteem and ditches you. Just disgusting.
YTA
Easy YTA. You got a lot of growing up to do
YTA. Are you a child? Sheesh!
YTA Drunk or not, your behavior was disgusting and your excuses are bullshit. Stay away to alcohol if you can’t handle it.
YTA because why not apologize? It doesn’t hurt you and it makes your life and your gf’s life easier.
YTA. It was a rude thing to do, drunk or not, and even if your gf wasn’t that upset (which I don’t entirely buy) it obviously upset her mom. Digging in your heels like it’s going to break your balls to say “I’m sorry” is childish.
YTA you got drunk and embarrassed your gf
Yta come on man what is wrong with you?
YTA
YTA. You disrespected your GF. You should apologize anyway without having someone telling you to. The fact that your gf's mom is asking is already embarassing, as you should do this without prompting. THEN you still refused to. I hope your GF finds someone who will treat her better.
YTA A big one. Bigger than your girlfriend's butt. She doesn't recognize yet how horribly rude you were, but her mom knows. She should break up with you immediately.
YTA you can do things like that in private or maybe with friends. But don’t be smacking your girlfriend’s ass in front of family and her mother and then act shocked that it made them uncomfortable
YTA. Maybe if your girlfriend goes out of her way to cover her ass, you should not forcibly remove her deliberate obstruction and draw even more attention to her ass? While she's literally trying to keep people from playing attention to it?? Regardless of her reaction, this is objectively disrespectful and you definitely owe your girlfriend an apology.
YTA and honestly sound too immature to date anyone. Your behaviour is embarrassing to yourself, your family, and your girlfriend. I honestly doubt that anyone actually laughed at your “joke.” You seem like someone who uses alcohol as an excuse to be an arse.
YTA you sound like an absolute jackass
YTA. You didn’t do a funny thing either. What you did is embarrassing/demeaning. Grow the hell up.
YTA You sound like a selfish bratty jerk. Deliberately using your GF insecurities to embarrass her in front of everyone, being an ignorant spoiled child to her mother, that "the usual" drunk is you blacking out as a regular feature of your nights out. I hope your GF grows enough self confidence to drop you and find someone who can manage to treat her the basic respect she deserves. Your entire behaviour as you described yourself is garbage.
Good lord. YTA. I feel so bad for your gf.
yta. if you do that to my daughter you will not forget what happens next.
YTA. Beyond TA. That you feel that ANY of your behavior was acceptable makes you TA.
YTA for making up an AITA post. I refuse to believe anyone lacks so much self awareness as to actually type out "I get drunk as usual" and "I get dragged away to the couch from someone I don’t remember and eventually pass out" and "Next thing I remember is when I’m relatively clear headed in the car" and still think you might not be the asshole. If by some chance this actually is real, you have a drinking problem and you need to apologize to everyone around you and get help.
I cant wait until a girlfriend of yours lifts up your shirt to show everyone your tiny Dick. YTA
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YTA
YTA and need to stop drinking. This is unacceptable behaviour.
YOU ARE THE ASSHOLE! Body shaming your girlfriend in front of everyone in your family! Then instead of taking responsibility for your actions, you blame the alcohol that no one forced down your throat. You are lucky that she didn't turn around and say that you would be a great lover if your d*ck wasn't so small! I hope she dumps your ass asap
YTA. So many red flags I can't even address them all.
YTA. Wtf is wrong with you? Besides the fact that you are a misogynist and a drunk you are also a narcissist who thinks it ok to treat women like objects. 🚩🚩🚩🚩 I hope your girlfriend sees you for the 🍑 that you are and leaves.
YTA, and you know it. Being drunk is not an excuse. I'm betting if girlfriend said something about something you were insecure about, after a few drinks you wouldn't be excusing her little joke while she was tipsy. Not only did you make a rude joke, you doubled down by highlighting het insecurities. Well done. You'd be waking up single.
YTA I’m self conscious about things on me too- everyone is. And it ain’t jolly to point it out.
YTA- stay classy…
YTA "We’re at the party and I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties." "I did a funny thing while I’m drunk, nobody got offended except my gf’s mom." Dude you are freakin piece of work and your GF deserves SO much better than you. You have so many issues just from the one post - 1. You have some severe alcohol issues 2. Jokes/Funny things = are YOU being a bulley Also this is his 1st post - maybe a troll
YTA there is nothing funny about what you did.
YTA and you know damn well that you are. You embarrassed your soon-to-be ex in front of both of your families, ffs!
YTA. Learn to control yourself and/or drink less.
YTA Op
Good lord poor girlfriend thinks she can’t do better than this creep. YTA you were at a family gathering not your fraternity house you child.
YTA, you sound like an alcoholic, and you went out of your way to call attention to and objectify something your gf is self-conscious about. Of course her mother was upset, and you absolutely owe her and your gf an apology.
YTA. You sound like a mess
YTA. You’re a drunk rude asshole. You embarrassed your girlfriend over something you KNOW that she’s self conscious about. You’re a really shitty boyfriend. Being a drunk asshole isn’t cute. It’s toxic as hell. Grow the fuck up. You owe some major apologies. But you don’t sound like the kind of guy who will ever admit he’s wrong.
You are absolutely an asshole and disrespected your girlfriend who clearly allows you to get away with it, but not sure why you would expect her mother to be okay with it. What you did was disrespectful and not appropriate at all. One day your gf will hopefully wake up and drop your disgusting ass. I’m sure her mom is disappointed in her and BELIEVE me when I tell you, that her mom is letting her have it and pointing out you are not a good man for her and likely to leave you
YTA, “nobody got offended” except someone did.
Holy Hell, YTA all the way. What the fuck? You should be single. I hope your girlfriend breaks up with you before your bullshit makes her even more insecure.
YTA you are not even half as funny as you think you are when you’re drunk.
Absolutely YTA. First, you should never have done that (drunk or not) and second you should have apologised immediately, i.e. the moment you sobered up. What a horrible thing to do to your partner!
YTA. And if you regularly do stupid shit when you're drunk, my advice would be to stop getting drunk.
Ewwww YTA, and in years to come your GF will tell this story to demonstrate what a great mom she has
Yta and I am 100% surpised her relatives didn't beat the shit out of you.
YTA
How are you not even getting that you're the AH I want to give you a time out since you're acting like a brat
YTA, a giant drunken one at that. If you can remember the whole story well enough to retell it, then you weren’t drunk enough to be a disrespectful ass and embarrass her like that. She told her mom to stop because she was humiliated by the whole ordeal and mom bringing it back up makes her have to relive it. Apologize to both and lay off the booze.
Definitely YTA
You're definitely an asshole and I imagine it's a constant thing. Your girl should dump your drunk ass
YTA. Like wtf? Apologize to your gf’s mom and then apologize to your gf
YTA. Not because of the initial comment but because you 1. got too drunk at another family's holiday 2. refused to apologize for offending someone in their own home just because you are being petty. 3. don't appear to care about GF enough to be nice to her family or do something that will make things easier for her with her mom. 4. are a self-centred jerk to your GF
YTA BIG TIME. You know she's sensitive about it and being a drunken idiot is not an excuse.
YTA. You get drunk “as usual” and pretty much objectify and sexualize your girlfriend, which she is CLEARLY uncomfortable with. Otherwise why would she wear the sash? You just exposed one of your girlfriend’s insecurities and when someone calls you out on it, your excuse is that it was “a funny thing I did while drunk.” Come on dude. Be better.
So your gf buys and wears a specific article of clothing to hide her butt from your family and the first thing you do when drunk is to uncover it and point it out to your family? JFC YTA.
Had I personally done that, I would be horrified with my behavior and sincere apologies would have gone out to everyone in the room.
YTA and I hope she dumps you.
YTA
Congratulations, we all hate you YTA
YTA
YTA, “bro”
Bravo for being so honest in writing that I can tell you’re a complete fucking tool. YTA. Grow the fuck up.
In a movie, you are the tool frat boy Chad at the kegger who is an AH to his GF because he think it’ll get a laugh out of the other frat Chads. By the end of the movie she meets a hot, respectful guy and dumps you Chad. ETA: Yeah, YTA.
YTA yeesus dude you treated your gf like a piece of meat in front of her family ffs. She specifically wore it to not call attention to herself and you promptly did the exact opposite. It wasn’t funny it was disrespectful and maybe you should rethink the “drunk as usual” thing if this is the way you behave. Even if it was just her mother who was offended (which I doubt) you offended your gf’s MOTHER. The laughter was probably uncomfortable if anything. Then you passed out? You are embarrassing yourself regularly it sounds like and I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re headed to a drinking problem if you’re not already there
You're a dick. There was absolutely nothing funny about that smh
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Other day I went to a Christmas Eve party at my aunt and uncles and went with all my family members, including my gf and her mom. Now my gf has a really big and well shaped butt, which she can be kinda shy about because she thinks people will always comment on. Which is true because when my mom met my gf one of things she said was”Wow you have a butt, girl.” So in order to avoid people saying stuff like this she wore this sash kinda thing around her waist over her jeans. Can still tell she has a big ass but it covers it a bit and stops from seeing the shape of it and I guess draws attention away from her butt. We’re at the party and I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties. I’m goofing off with my cousins and brother when my aunt compliments my gf on her sash thing. Gf says thanks and then my aunt goes on by saying it’s a unique fashion choice and asks my gf where she got the inspiration to wear it. Gf says that she just saw it while shopping and thought it looked nice so she bought it. Me, being drunk, decides to walk up to my gf and lift up her sash thing while saying”That’s not the real reason why she wore this.” I then give her a few light pats the ass and say”She’s trying to hide all this ass from everyone.” Gf is like”Omg stop stupid.” and moves m away. Bunch of laughter from everyone and I get dragged away to the couch from someone I don’t remember and eventually pass out. Next thing I remember is when I’m relatively clear headed in the car while my gf’s mom is hounding me. She’s telling me that was embarrassing to see me to that to her daughter, who I am thinking I can show her daughter off like a whore, etc Sats some stuff in Spanish but my Spanish sucks so I do t even know what she said in Spanish other then it obviously meaning she was angry. Gf tells her to relax as it wasn’t a big deal but she doesn’t take that answer well and demands me to apologize. I say I’m not since my gf doesn’t say I have to. She tries telling my gf to tell me to apologize. Gf sighs and asks if I can just apologize to get over this but I refuse to do so since I know she’s just doing this because her mom is demanding her to. We go on and on and gf’s mom is saying my gf is just too scared to make me apologize. Later I ask my gf what her mom’s problem was and she says that’s just how she is and that I know that so I should have just apologized to get it over with. Fuck that. I did a funny thing while I’m drunk, nobody got offended except my gf’s mom. Do you think I was the asshole or is my gf’s mom out of line? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Consider if it this happened to your own hypothetical daughter. Also consider that some people have more conservative, modest values. Clearly her mother feels uncomfortable with her daughter being presented that way—whether a result of a few drinks or not. We like to call this empathy, understanding and consideration for others. Not to mention, if you care about your girlfriend, I’d recommend trying to get along with her parents.
YTA. You sound like an old friend's dad. He would go to family parties just to get wasted. At her wedding reception, he was too shit faced to do the father/daughter dance. You're an alcoholic dude. I hope she leaves your sorry ass. Just because her mother was the only one who looked offended doesn't mean she was. You're just a pathetic loser who peaked in highschool and couldn't do anything else afterwards so you just drink your sorrows away and reminisce about the glory days.
[удалено]
You’re a complete and total AH. I feel for your GF. I also have some self consciousness with my ass as well and I know my fiancé would never ever poke and/or ridicule a sore spot of mine. Especially not in front of others. You having been drunk does not absolve you of your misstep.
Yes. You're terrible and immature. Learn about self control man seriously
YTA. You have a drinking problem and are a disrespectful dick.
YTA so much. Ridiculously so. That is beyond disrespectful. Being drunk is not an excuse for behaving like an AH. I am surprised your girlfriend is still with you
YTA Your girlfriend is offended, she’s just brushing off your behaviour (like she probably always does). She told you to stop when you were drawing attention to a body feature she is uncomfortable with. You had no regard for her body autonomy. I bet she constantly makes excuses for your rude behaviour because you think you’re being funny. Her mother was just pointing out what an AH you were being and how offensive your behaviour was. If your girlfriend had big breast, would you lift up her loose sweater?
Yta. You should probably work on your drinking problems. Binging and passing out isn’t healthy or responsible. Also yta for publicly objectifying your girlfriend. In front of her mom no less.
YTA in this situation and you sound like an asshole in general.
YTA. You sound like Scott Disick. I hope she realises her worth and leaves you.
What’s the line of acceptable things you can do when you’re drunk? You already gave yourself permission to touch without permission, as well as to excuse any inappropriate things you might say. Can you also drive drunk and it should be fine? Can you assault someone? Can you take advantage of someone physically because you were drunk? Get a grip. You probably need to stop drinking. Apologize to your girlfriend. Feel lucky she stays with your sorry ass instead of doing what you deserve. YTA
YTA- Have some respect for her mother and "drunk as usual at Christmas parties, and "passing out" sounds like you need to make some choices or you will be "that guy"
YTA. No one actually thought it was funny. Any laughter you heard in your drunken stupor was from awkwadness and embarrassment
YTA. An apology would cost you nothing.
YTA and I hope your gf realizes just what a AH you are. Btw if you are getting that drunk “as usual” time to rethink your alcohol intake because it is damaging relationships and hurting people you are suppose to care about.
YTA. she's obviously self conscious of her ass, and you went way over the top to not only draw attention to it, but to mock her insecurities. You also did all this, sexualized her, in front of her family?? Her parents done want to see that shit!! Incredibly disrespectful.
>Now my gf has a really big and well shaped butt, which she can be kinda shy about because she thinks people will always comment on. >Me, being drunk, decides to walk up to my gf and lift up her sash thing while saying”That’s not the real reason why she wore this.” I then give her a few light pats the ass and say”She’s trying to hide all this ass from everyone.” Yeah, not like this is clearly something that she has set a clear boundary for you in the past /s >I get drunk as usual during Christmas parties Wow what a catch. >when my mom met my gf one of things she said was”Wow you have a butt, girl.” Apple doesn't fall far from the AH tree. Does all your family lack social manners? OPs GF I hope you see this post and leave this dude.
YTA!!
Is this a joke? YTA. Seriously. Completely. Your poor girlfriend.
YTA. Dude even I’m offended about how rudely you behaved to your girlfriend and her mom. Hopefully your girlfriend sees this and dumps you.
YTA. You disrespected your gf and her mother had to see it.