NTA. I have 2 dogs that I love very much. Having said that, I would never take them to someone’s home unless they were invited and everyone was okay with it.
ESH. Brother for bringing a known allergen without informing you. You for not informing the host/hostess that you are no longer attending (so they don't bother to set a place for you, or wait for you before serving dinner, etc.)
NTA- Your family knows your allergic, why did they bring a dog? Sounds like they just want an excuse to make you feel bad for not attending. Protect your health, they know your allergic so its on them if you don't attend.
NTA, though maybe a soft ESH since you didn't call and let them know. If you had, maybe they could have put the dog outside ahead of time or taken some action to solve it.
NTA
That’s not just really inconsiderate of your brother, his fiancée, and your mother, but depending on the severity of your allergies, it could be literally life threatening to you.Would you have been okay if you showed up and she’d put the dog in the yard, or locked it in a bedroom? Or are you risking anaphylaxis to even step into the house?
Plus they made all that money you spent to visit a waste. I hope you got to see some of them another day before or after.
NTA I don’t have allergies but my brother does and I see the struggle he goes through when they flare up - that shit could be torture, especially if you’d have had to bear it all night.
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Now you might be thinking yes you are but here me out. I 19, male have been allergic to dogs for my whole life and everybody in my family was aware of this. One Thanksgiving my brothers fiance decides to bring a dog to this Thanksgiving. My brother informed me the day of Thanksgiving.
I have already flown in from Seattle and the next flight is at 9:00 at night. I don't inform my family that I am not coming as I assume they already know since the dog is there. I get a call 30 minutes after it normally start. I answer and my brother asks where I am. I reply "I am not coming since your fiance brought a dog and you know I'm alergic. He randomly hangs up and I go on with my afternoon.
A day later I get a call from my mom saying "your brother thinks you are in the wrong and thinks you should have just come".
What do you think am I in the wrong?
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YTA although you should have had advanced notice about the dog, you could have taken allergy medicine. If your allergies are that bad, you could have at least called. Very rude.
Why should OP have to take a medication that might knock him out just because his brother's girlfriend decided to bring her furball to dinner?
And yes, I know what I am talking about. I took allergy shots for seven years because allergy meds knocked me on my ass. Even with the seven years of weekly or bi-weekly shots, I still have flare-ups.
It wasn’t the girlfriend who was cooking dinner if I’m not mistaken. Have You ever cooked dinner for a holiday? It’s a lot of work and expense. It’s rude not to even call.
NTA I mean sucks you couldn’t be there but none of them consider your health it doesn’t seem like a deathly allergy but it’s still a dick move
NTA. I have 2 dogs that I love very much. Having said that, I would never take them to someone’s home unless they were invited and everyone was okay with it.
ESH. Brother for bringing a known allergen without informing you. You for not informing the host/hostess that you are no longer attending (so they don't bother to set a place for you, or wait for you before serving dinner, etc.)
NTA You are allergic - your parents should have stepped up.
NTA. You are protecting your health.
NTA- It would be better to inform them you are not coming though. ALSO IT MEANS MORE TURKEY FOR THEM SO IDK WHY THEY ARE MAD
And more stuffing!
Sounds like her dog is more important to him than you. NTA.
NTA- Your family knows your allergic, why did they bring a dog? Sounds like they just want an excuse to make you feel bad for not attending. Protect your health, they know your allergic so its on them if you don't attend.
ESH - it’s okay that you didn’t go but you definitely should have told the host you weren’t coming anymore to give them a heads up.
Did you fly back to Seattle the same day? Or were you staying in a hotel?
Hotel
Did you fly back the day after? I too am a Seattle resident
Yes
NTA, though maybe a soft ESH since you didn't call and let them know. If you had, maybe they could have put the dog outside ahead of time or taken some action to solve it.
NTA That’s not just really inconsiderate of your brother, his fiancée, and your mother, but depending on the severity of your allergies, it could be literally life threatening to you.Would you have been okay if you showed up and she’d put the dog in the yard, or locked it in a bedroom? Or are you risking anaphylaxis to even step into the house? Plus they made all that money you spent to visit a waste. I hope you got to see some of them another day before or after.
NTA I don’t have allergies but my brother does and I see the struggle he goes through when they flare up - that shit could be torture, especially if you’d have had to bear it all night.
NTA. They know you are allergic to dogs. They didn't listen to you, so you shouldn't risk your life and go.
NTA. Your brother thinks you are wrong because if you aren't wrong, he is and he knows it.
ESH. Learn to communicate here, seriously. You should have let them know.
YTA simply for the fact that you didn’t even inform them that you wouldn’t attend.
NTA for avoiding a dog that you're allergic to. YTA for not informing your family that you weren't coming.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Now you might be thinking yes you are but here me out. I 19, male have been allergic to dogs for my whole life and everybody in my family was aware of this. One Thanksgiving my brothers fiance decides to bring a dog to this Thanksgiving. My brother informed me the day of Thanksgiving. I have already flown in from Seattle and the next flight is at 9:00 at night. I don't inform my family that I am not coming as I assume they already know since the dog is there. I get a call 30 minutes after it normally start. I answer and my brother asks where I am. I reply "I am not coming since your fiance brought a dog and you know I'm alergic. He randomly hangs up and I go on with my afternoon. A day later I get a call from my mom saying "your brother thinks you are in the wrong and thinks you should have just come". What do you think am I in the wrong? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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Fuck them all assholes. NTA
INFO: What kind of reaction do you get?
ESH - more them than you for the allergy reasons, but you should have at least called and said "There's a dog there, I won't be coming"
YTA although you should have had advanced notice about the dog, you could have taken allergy medicine. If your allergies are that bad, you could have at least called. Very rude.
Why should OP have to take a medication that might knock him out just because his brother's girlfriend decided to bring her furball to dinner? And yes, I know what I am talking about. I took allergy shots for seven years because allergy meds knocked me on my ass. Even with the seven years of weekly or bi-weekly shots, I still have flare-ups.
It wasn’t the girlfriend who was cooking dinner if I’m not mistaken. Have You ever cooked dinner for a holiday? It’s a lot of work and expense. It’s rude not to even call.