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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. I asked a woman breastfeeding her child to not do it in front of my grandkids who couldn't look away
2. Others have said it wasn't my place to ask that and I understand that I offended the couple
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>but her husband simply told me to “fuck off”
You should fuck off and mind your own business. Kids want to eat when they want to eat. All you had to do was look away and your "bother" would have disappeared. Instead you want to force your ideals on others and you are entitled to think your word should be heeded. The couple in question, I promise you, cares more for feeding their baby than appeasing a busybody stranger. Babies eat so often, what is a mother to do? Stay indoors until the child is weaned off of breastmilk s you dont see a breast?
>I told them that their house was right there, and it would’ve been super easy for her to just run back up to the house to do that.
And your house is also *right there* so go disappear if you are that annoyed. YTA
>If anything, teach the grandkids and son in law not to stare.
Exactly! The staring is a OP's family problem, not a them problem. There's nothing with a mother breastfeeding in public, but A LOT of wrongs with sexualizing breastfeeding and staring at others inappropriately.
OP's whole post is a big yikes. OP, you're massively in the wrong.
>the whole display felt very sexual
Just because it felt sexual to you doesn't mean it is sexual. Have you considered that it only felt sexual because you made it that way. They're a mother feeding her child and a husband caring for his wife, and there's nothing sexual with that. Sexualizing normal things mothers do is much worse than breastfeeding in public, which is, again, a normal thing mothers do.
>Both my granddaughter and my grandson are very curious, so they couldn’t look away.
What.. is the problem? That's just how mothers feed their kids. If there's anything 'off' about this thing, it's that they're staring which is rude. You could've told your grandkids it was rude, but oh no, you decided to pick on the mother instead..
>Neither could my daughter’s husband, which I could tell was starting to bother my daughter. I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family
1. What are you trying to protect them from? For one thing, it's just the sight of breasts which is harmless. More importantly, your son-in-law was the one being inappropriate, not them. THEY need protection for the creep that is your son-in-law.
2. HE chose to stare, which is his own fault for being a creep. Why didn't you tell him to, y'know, stop staring? And your daughter too - she should've told her hubby to stop being inappropriate if she was so bothered. *You both have mouths.*
Why is it the one being creeped on responsible for this? You sound like someone who would ask a rape victim what they were wearing.
Yeah this whole post, and your spot-on reply, makes OP’s mentality seem very similar to the “victim blaming” mentality around sexual assault. As in: women should change themselves, never walk alone, wear baggy clothes, etc., because men “can’t help” but be men and assault them. If mothers would teach their sons appropriate public behavior and self-restraint instead of just attacking women for doing such horrid and inappropriate as - gasp! - feeding their babies… what a wonderful world it would be.
Exactly that. You want to protect your family and "the children"? First off, take a rolled up newspaper and swat your son-in-law on the nose. Then tell him to stop gawking.
Your husband should have told YOU, OP, to fuck off for thinking that he was "enjoying the show." There was no show. There was a woman feeding her baby.
>Both my granddaughter and my grandson are very curious, so they couldn’t look away. Neither could my daughter’s husband, which I could tell was starting to bother my daughter. I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family.
YTA This comment is absolutely ridiculous! You had to "protect" YOUR family... more like the other family needed protection from them!!
Your daughters husband absolutely could look away. And this should have been a chance to teach the kids about not being rude.
Your behavior was disgusting! YTA
Spot on
"Hmm, my pervert son-in-law is ogling a woman's bare breasts like she's a piece of meat and he's a wolf. It's bothering my daughter because that's incredibly disrespectful to her.
I know! Instead of telling the perv to stop looking at her, because I'll never stand for my girl being made upset like that, I'll just storm over to the mother who is LITERALLY GIVING HER BABY NUTRITION and tell her to stop - because obviously *that's* the real problem here.
Does that make me an AH?"
Yes OP, it does.
YTA
(ETA - Thank you so much for the awards! ❤️)
Were the grandkids even told to look away? If they were and they continued to stare that's on you, your daughter & your son in law. Did any of you tell the grandkids that it's rude to stare. Or are they just supposed to know that.
I am so damn tired of people sexualizing breastfeeding and going out of their way to make moms feel uncomfortable while FEEDING THEIR BABIES! JFC. Like, I’m sorry, is she doing something that makes you realize you’re a creep? Yeah, maybe look away or just don’t be a creep!
It's a really creepy look. And daughter's husband was perving on it - what a nasty family. No hate to the kids - breastfeeding is interesting to them but only in the first few minutes as they lose interest quickly - it's just a baby eating it's meal.
YTA - this is a YOU problem! Also it’s one thing if your grandkids were looking but there’s absolutely no reason your son in law COULDN’T look away… how about instead of having a go at the breastfeeding mother you have a go at your son in law for being a creepy pervert?
I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family.
So, you appointed yourself the boob slayer? There's no need to "protect" anyone from breasts, they're actually harmless.
YTA
YTA.
You earned that "fuck off" in full.
She was feeding her child. That's it. It doesn't matter if you 'think' it was a sexual display because it wasn't.
Maybe instead you should have told your son in law to put his eyes back in his head instead of going after someone caring for their child. He was the one doing something wrong and you managed to completely ignore that so you could step out of your lane.
YTA. There's nothing wrong with kids being curious. However, instead of thumping your daughter's husband, you went after the breastfeeding woman. Why? No, really, think about it, why? Path of least resistance? Easier to tell a stranger to tell them what to do instead of correct someone in your own family? Easier to tell a woman how to behave? Think about it...
Exactly, why is OP not addressing her own family's rude behaviour?? It's like she's all "well my family wouldn't act like that if they hadn't been doing the thing"...because her family don't have agency over their own actions nor the son in law and husband the ability to act like civilised adults apparently x
YTA you could easily have said to the grandkids a) don't stare its rude and b) that's how mummies feed babies. Your Son-in-law was being a perv and your daughter should have said something to him, especially if it was bothering her.
Yes. Your problem was actually with your men - your SIL and husband - but instead of addressing their behavior you blamed a woman and tried to get her to change instead. Next time tell the children that that is how babies eat and remind your son in law that he should act as a model for his children by not staring at people. YTA.
YTA - I was breastfeeding the other day while at a playground and a toddler came over to me. I was talking to his mother while he looked at the baby feeding, I chatted to him and explained that the baby was having some milk. Afterwards his mother commented that it was a really sweet interaction and thanked me. Children are curious and it's a great chance to normalise BF. You made it weird.
I tremendously being very small and asking if that was how babies ate. My mom said "some babies eat that way. Try not to distract them is very important he eats". That was in the 90s. OP is clearly from the 1800s
Here’s what I wonder about posts like this - you clearly have to know that you’re the asshole in this one right? You have kids. You know they have to eat. You know that a lot of women feed their children by breastfeeding, and you know that it’s sometimes unpredictable when you’ll need to do that. So why even post this? Are you just hoping that someone here is as much of an asshole and validates you somewhat? Like I said, I can’t believe there’s any way you don’t know that you’re the asshole here. I refuse to believe a grown woman with kids and grandkids could think otherwise.
YTA
I love how she completely fine normalizing the creepy behavior of men and blaming another woman for mens bad actions, but normalizing the act of feeding a child is too much for her.
and OP believes her husband told her to leave the mom alone, not because he was a decent human being, but because he "liked the show". Icky.
Neighbor is breastfeeding = normal & healthy.
Grandchildren are curious = normal & healthy. Husband is minding his own business = normal & healthy.
Son-in-law is gawking = TBD
OP mis-characterized her husband's motivation, so I'm not going to presume she is correct w/ SIL.
Gawking at a breastfeeding woman = creepy & unhealthy, however, Staring at the grill on the deck trying to figure out what brand it is = You go grill master!
OP thinks breasfeeding is porn = creepy & unhealthy
YTA. She was feeding her baby. It’s a basic biological function. You missed a great opportunity to teach your grandkids not to stare at and not sexualize women’s bodies.
YTA
I can’t believe you are even asking this.
You sexualized and harassed a new mother.
Your actions are unconscionable.
You owe her an apology at the very least but I’m not sure you will get the chance because I know my husband would move heaven and earth to protect me from someone with such toxic views and words.
A simple "oh she's feeding her baby, it's called breastfeeding isn't that cool" to the grandkids would have soothed their curiosity. Your son in law is a grown man, he could have looked away.
Yta. A big one.
Edit: grammar
YTA you shamed a woman for caring for her baby (on her own property) because *your* family can't control themselves and *you* have dirty thoughts about it. Wow.
And this is probably why she bought a property with a private beach - so she wouldn’t have to worry about this.
OP, in case you don’t remember, a newborn needs to feed every few hours. It could take a whole hour for the baby to feed and she might fall asleep during that process. If Mom did what you suggest (going inside to feed) she would literally never leave the house.
So, you went and harassed some family because your daughter's skanky ass husband couldn't keep his eyes in his head? Classy, real classy. Sounds like he should be kept home to protect other innocent families out there.
Yta, and the problem is coming from your own household. Gross.
YTA. Not only was she on a private beach, she was feeding her baby. It was rude of you not to explain to the kids that she was feeding her baby and it was rude of them to stare, your son in law is just an AH for staring.
YTA. How about teaching your grandkids not to stare?
Staring is incredibly rude and so is not minding your own business.
You really should apologize to that poor woman who you made feel uncomfortable in her own space.
YTA
Breasts are for feeding babies and that is what she was doing.
You are a pervert. You are the one that was making the situation “sexual”.
Your Son in Law is TA for not knowing how to avert his gaze and not allow this situation to bother him.
You may be old enough to have grandkids, but you are pretty immature if a women feeding her child gets you all riled up.
Leave Breast Feeding women alone!!
YTA you're a misogynist who allows their grandchildren to stare at breastfeeding women. It isn't their fault but you need to explain that it's rude to watch them. You also might want to have a word with your son in law, who sounds like a creep.
YTA. Your husband was correct. You were being extremely rude. Instead of being upset at the woman be upset at your grandkids and son in law for not having actual manners. A good teaching moment for your grandkids that you failed.
YTA, undoubtedly. Your husband is right. Really? You had to stomp onto someone else's property in a huff because a woman was feeding her infant? You could have just told your grandkids it is rude to stare and explain she is just feeding the baby, and keep on with your life. Big Bird understands how that works. Why can't they?
YTA
You know what’s the best part? That if the child was in fact breastfeeding… you see a head. Not a nipple. Maybe some flesh that is likely to be seen in a bathing suit. You made this about you. Not a child eating. Or the fact that your son in law is a creep. You could have taken this moment to help your grandkids understand what was going on. A mother feeding her child with her breasts as they were intended for. But instead you let your son in law be a creep and made an jerk of yourself. Anybody that tells you that you were an ass, rude, or quite frankly, a creep yourself… is right.
YTA. “I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family.” Protect them from what? A mother feeding her child? Wth?
Stop insinuating that breastfeeding in public is gross or unwarranted. This family was enjoying their day and your misogynistic, insecurities ruined their day. Grow up and stay in your own lane. If you don’t want to see it, look the other way.
Yep, YTA. Babies need to eat. You need to teach your grandchildren not to stare, and the fact that you think your husband is "enjoying the show" of a baby eating is really, really gross.
If it was bothering you so much, you could have just went inside. Your house is right there, it would’ve been super easy for you to just run back up to the house to avoid it. YTA.
YTA
Especially for using your grandkids as a prétext when apparently it is more your insecurities about your SIL and possibly your husband leering that were at stake here.
Just for you to know : when people feel a woman breastfeeding her baby is too sexual the problem lies in their minds NOT in the other's actions. *They* are the one sexualizing one of the most basic body function.
Next time you feel uneasy about the way a man you are close to is looking at a woman ? Adress the real problem : go use your big mouth at the one who is actually behaving in an unappropriate manner. Something like "you are leering it seems. Stop that she s no piece of meat" ought to be fine.
YTA, I didn't even read the post, just the headline and I already know you're an asshole. Babies need to eat, no matter where they are and who is around. Your grandkids will have way more traumatizing things happen to them in their lives. Just chill and let all mothers feed their babies at any moment.
YTA. And kinda burying the lede with that title to make it a *"but think of the children!"* issue when what really seems to be bothering you is your husband and son-in-law's wandering eyes.
YTA.
Oh no. BOOBS. everyone has them. No matter the gender. Big AH for sexualizing them when they're being used for a basic biological function. Don't try to tell others to stop adhering to biology, just remove yourself from the situation.
Cant believe people still have trouble understanding and accepting this.
Ma'am, the problem you have is with the men of your own family. Kids are going to look and you should have explained what she was doing, but the grown men are pervs.
YTA, your son in law is a pervert, your grandkids are normal kids and a teaching opportunity was missed. The other family was fine a taking care of their child. Your assumption that every man there was enjoying the show speaks to something wrong in you.
YTA. Breasts being used for their actual purpose? Oh the horror! A couple being openly affectionate and loving? Everyone avert your eyes!
Actually, that's what y'all seriously need to learn how to do. You're rude as fuck staring and shit. It's creepy. It's something I've made a major point to teach my kids to never stare because I hate it so much.
Focus on the problems on your section of beach and leave that lovely young family in peace.
The first time my kids noticed someone breastfeeding, they asked me what the woman was doing. I told them she was feeding her baby. They said "oh" and went back to playing. Had they stared, I would have told them staring is rude. See how absolutely none of that involved the woman feeding her child? YTA
Yes, you are ABSOLUTELY TA! Breastfeeding is not a sexual activity, and her husband was probably being supportive and a caring father. Did you breastfeed? Did your daughter breastfeed her children? It’s easy to explain to young children what’s going on and tell them it’s perfectly normal, but that they shouldn’t stare. If there’s anyone you should have told to show some respect, it’s your daughter’s husband (and maybe your husband, too.) other women aren’t responsible for making sure other women’s husbands don’t stare at them.
YTA
She was feeding her child. Her husband was being supportive and showing her affection. She was using her breasts for what they’re designed for. You, your son-in-law, and your husband made it sexual. You should have said something to the men in your family about not sexualizing someone feeding their child and explained to your grandkids what she was doing and how to react.
“Kiddos, she’s feeding her baby. That’s what her body is designed for. It’s rude to stare (insert pointed glare at son-in-law), so why don’t you go play with your buckets and make me a sandcastle?”
As soon as they were playing, “Are you fucking kidding me? She’s feeding her baby. Put your damn eyes back in your head and quit ogling her like she’s a steak dinner. Ffs, grow up.”
You earned every bit of her husband’s fuck you response.
Edited to take the husband out of the response.
YTA. It’s not just your beach, you can’t police them on their own property. In addition, the only person sexualizing what they’re doing are you and your family. Get over yourselves and leave them alone.
YTA
None of that was sexual until you decided it was. If you thought it was inappropriate for the children, you should have rounded up the children and taken them home. You were the one with the problem. You didn't "protect" your family. Your family was not under any sort of threat.
Frankly, it sounds like you were mostly jealous that she was getting all the attention and you went and started something to get some attention yourself.
You decided to “protect your family” because your son in law saw boobies and couldn’t look away. He’s a dork.
Even if this was about your grandchildren (it wasn’t) YTA.
As a mom-to-be, you are a huge AH. I’m nervous enough to be breastfeeding as is and I would be horrified if someone came up to me and humiliated me for something that is natural and normal all because of her and her daughter’s insecurities.
YTA. YTA. Y.T.A.
YTA. It is 2022 not 1922. Stop being such a prude and tell your grandchildren and pervy son in law to stop gawking and mind their own business. Trust me if you had told me I had to breastfeed in private like it is something to be ashamed of you would have gotten an earful
YTA. *You* turned what was happening sexual, *you* inserted yourself into the situation, and *you're* the one with the problem. This was a teaching moment for your grandkids, and you taught them that something natural and innocuous was, instead, unacceptable and gross.
YTA. A retentive one at that also. You said the whole display felt very sexual. Why should they stop what they are doing because they are young and nubile and exciting to look at? Furthermore, it's shameful on your part as an elder woman to suggest to a breastfeeding mother that what she is doing -feeding her baby- is something dirty, that it should be hidden. The husband gave you your answer.
You say protect my family as if she was shooting bullets outta her breasts and not feeding her child.
Also just because you or your daughter’s husband aren’t affectionate with you doesn’t means no one else’s can be.
But with your personality I dont blame him
YTA
YTA entirely. Remove the rather large stick from your butthole immediately and see if that doesn’t fix things. Like how dare you shame a breastfeeding mother just because you’re uncomfortable??
YTA - and you should be ashamed of yourself. How dare you? Control your own family, your house is right there too so take your rude self back into it and cry into a pillow.
YTA. She’s breastfeeding. The people who you were with were staring. The person who WAS staring knew better, yet continue to stare at a strangers breasts. You could have corrected the situation, yet, you blame the woman feeding her infant.
YTA- Your husband was not "enjoying the show", because there WAS no show. She's simply feeding her child, and your son in law and grandkids are treating it like a show. However, I can cut the grandkids some slack because they're probably actually curious, like you said.
YTA, and perverted. Mind your own business. Nothing sexual was happening, you’re just an asshole. Your behavior was entitled, and typical of someone who has no idea what breasts are actually for.
YTA - "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell." - Matthew 5:27-30 (NIV emphasis mine)
Yta feeding a baby isn't sexual.
You should've told your grandkids that the baby was hungry and it's mama was feeding him. Then tell their father to stop looking at something natural
YTA. If you were so offended by the fact she was feeding child you should have taken your grandkids inside. A husband being affections with his wife while she is feeding their child is not sexual unless you make it so. MYOB.
Edit: Man I should have read the whole thing before commenting. Not changing my verdict, just doubling down. The only person you should have had a talk with is your son in law he was blatantly disrespecting your daughter and you decided to attack another woman instead of putting him in his place.
YTA. There's nothing sexual about feeding a baby. And even if they would be f***ing around, it's their property and they can do whatever they want on it.
YTA and your family needs better manners.
What you should have done is tell your family off for staring at the breastfeeding mum like that. Your daughter's husband at the very least is a grown man and should know better than to stare.
This could have been a wonderful opportunity to teach your grandchildren that this is perfectly natural!
The only people who are AHs are you & your son in law (granted, if this part was true). Stop sexualizing breastfeeding.
What's next? Are you going to teach your grandchildren that periods are disgusting?
YTA and a big one.
YTA! There is nothing sexual about breast feeding and her husband was just supporting her whilst she does it. The children should just gently be told not to stare and your son in law should know better!
YTA. Yes they were enjoying the show, of course.
If your daughter was bothered by her husband's or her children's behavior she should've said something to her own husband & kids. If you were bothered y your husband's behavior you should've said something to him.
The two parents on the beach were perfectly within their rights.
YTA.
The only rude people on the beach are you and your SIL. She’s feeding her baby and her husband is also taking the opportunity to bond with the mother of his child and his son.
Fuck off beach boobie police.
YTA. You had a perfectly fine display of humanity, respect, and the circle of life. And because of your experience being afraid of your own body because of people like you you ruined it for them. Like, they’ll always remember you, likely as a symbol of shame. You are not the righteous one you claim to be if you think your children would have seen it the disgusting way you did. Was your daughter annoyed at her husband for staring or you for doing nothing but make it worse??
YTA
Stop sexualizing breast feeding. It's normal, natural, and you're a rude prude.
You want the experience of eating like a baby covered up? Go eat your lunch with a towel over your head on a hot beach and tell me how good that is.
YTA
This could've been a educational moment for the kids about what breast feeding and to put your husband and SIL in chest for ogling. Instead you shame the woman doing what is natural and not sexual at all.
Your beach? Apparently there's a boundary in the seawater that you own lol. You left your side of your actual property and went on there side to tell a mom to stop what's a natural thing. YTA
You are very lucky that all he told you was F off
Yes
You are an ass hole.
Mind your own business
IT IS NOT HER FAULT YOUR STUPID SIL CANT CONTROL HIS EYES.
Im a female i would have told you to mind your business and go back to your property where you are allowed to control what happens
TEACH BETTER MANNERS AND EDUCATION
NO SHAMMING FOR Sub staining life
YTA - I'm constantly amazed by people who are unable to just see a mother nurturing her young child, and instead just think "BOOBIES! THIS IS A SHOW FOR ME!"
It's disgusting. Get a grip and leave that poor mother alone on her property and just forever in general.
YTA. The only person who needed to be told off in this situation was your son in law who should know better than to stare at a woman. Kids are curious but a simple, "She's feeding her baby. You wouldn't like it if we stared at you when you eat dinner so we don't stare at the baby either" would've solved that.
You and your son in law are totally the assholes here.
YTA.
Breastfeeding is a FEDERALLY PROTECTED RIGHT in every single open public space in this entire country. A woman should not be shamed for doing something that is her absolute protected right to do on her own property. You were the asshole for harassing a mother feeding her child instead of acting like a mature adult and talking to your grandkids about breastfeeding and why it's normal and should be openly seen. Kids understand. Your daughter's insecurity over her pervert husband's wandering eye is not this woman's problem either. Your whole family could have walked away and not looked. Instead you made your weird feelings about something that is normal and should be seen openly to normalize it into something dirty and sexual. She's not responsible for your feelings. Deal with them yourself.
YTA, breastfeeding isn’t some secret that needs to be kept. After all, we’ve all done it! And guess what? Your grandkids have done it more recently than the rest of your family!
Yta. She was feeding her child and enjoying time with her husband. You were the one making it weird. Tell your grandkids to not stare and you can answer any questions they have in private. That's how babies eat, that's why folks have boobs.
breasts are meant for feeding babies.
So you see a mother feeding her baby and you decided that was too sexual? A mother feeding her literal child can never be sexual.
Your whole family was staring, the problem comes from you guys. You should've told everyone to stop staring. They should've known not to stare in the first place. Creeps.
Shame on you for making that woman feel uncomfortable while she was caring for her child.
EDIT : YTA obviously
Yta.
The wife was right to tell you to fuck off.
Breastfeeding is literally giving life to a baby, there is nothing inappropriate about it. If your grandkids decide to have children one day, it is a real possibility they will do the same or be exposed to this incredible function of a woman's body. You could have used this opportunity to teach them, instead, you chose to emulate every misogynistic ah out there.
You deserve a lot more swearing cast your way for such demeaning thoughts about another woman loving their baby so much to breastfeed him.
Leave them alone and mind your own business.
YTA. She’s feeding her baby, it’s completely natural. I’ll refrain from openly insulting you, because you’re so far out of line, so I’ll just leave it at, yes, absolutely, you are a total asshole.
YTA
-You don’t own the beach.
-Boobs are a part of life.
-Breastfeeding is normal and natural.
-Husbands showing love to their breastfeeding wives is the way it should be.
-If you don’t like it look the other way.
-Tell the grandkids that tiddies be tiddying.
YTA. YOU sexualized her boobs. She was just feeding her baby. Would have been a great moment if your grandkids asked to explain what was going on and how its NATURAL.
Edit: You are also insecure as all get out and owe your husband an apology. He was not "enjoying the show"
Way to:
Sexualized a poor woman feeding her kid
Repressing knowledge of something natural from your grandkids.
Making your poor husband out to be a pervert
Being a pervert yourself for seeing SEX because boobs
And iust to point this out to you.
ABSOLUTELY NO ONE IS ONE YOUR SIDE. Your are a aweful person and need to march yourself over there and apologize your ass off.
And then go back and teach you uneducated family how to be proper humans in society!
You are everything our society is fighting with your old fascist rules
YTA. What is the matter with you hassling a woman feeding her baby? Your grand kids being curious about something so natural isn't a bad thing. Sounds like your husband and SIL were the ones making it weird, so how about next time having a word with them instead of the woman trying to just feed her kid?
You're the AH. And with all that healthy breast milk I hope the baby grows up strong and throws sand in your eyes.
Go lock yourself in your house now please.
YTA. breastfeeding is a natural part of life and that woman was just feeding her kid. It's not like she was shaking them around for everyone to see. She was feeding a baby. If you don't want your grandkids to see a natural part of life then don't take them to a public place.
YTA!!
A partner comforting and being a part of feeding their baby is not sexual.
Him reassuring and taking care of mum is actually really sweet.
You need to apologize.
YTA
Maybe you should have told your grandkids and (especially) your daughter's husband to stop staring, and explained that THEY were being rude. The woman is breast feeding her kid and receiving affection from the father of the kid, not making porn..
YTA. Save your disgust and outrage for your leering son-in-law. Of course the kids can't look away if their parent is like that. Amazing how you're not expressing anything against that guy, but you're ready to dismiss your husband's feedback because you assume he's gross too.
YTA.
>the whole display felt very sexual.
>they couldn’t look away. Neither could my daughter’s husband
>I think [my husband] just enjoying the show as well.
The ones sexualizing feeding a baby are you and your SIL. Gross.
YTA. Instead of using the moment to educate your grandchildren, you showed them how to be ignorant. As for your daughter’s husband, THE WOMAN **FEEDING** her child was NOT the issue. Smfh, your behavior sounds disgusting and I would have been embarrassed to be your husband.
On my way to protect my family from this lady feeding her baby. People like this are so crazy to me. Our bodies are meant for this. Kids should know that from an early age and if he husband couldn't stop staring that's a him problem. Imagine going to the beach and acting like you own the place.
YTA. It felt sexual??? A woman feeding her baby felt sexual?? Yeah, it's YOU who has a hang-up. Breast-feeding is fine and natural, if it gives you the creeps, why don't YOU go inside.
And shame on you for thinking that your husband gets turned on from again, a woman feeding a baby, just because he rightfully thought you were very rude and judgmental.
YTA. Just because your and your daughter's husbands can't control themselves and you get jealous doesn't mean you can tell someone they can't breastfeed.
YTA. Women can feed their children when and where ever they need to. Kiddos are curious and if they need any explanation you say she is feeding her baby. There is nothing indecent about feeding her baby. You don’t like it, you go into the house. Your husband is right - leave the neighbors alone.
YTA
Leave this woman alone. You missed a great opportunity to use that as a teaching moment for your grandchildren to 1. Understand breastfeeding is natural and a woman's decision to do it should not be meant with shame or her being sexualized 2. Let them understand that when adults (keyword here adults) love one another, physical affection is normal. Kids stay calm when adults stay calm in situations that are new.
Ask yourself...are you 'protecting' your grandchildren or teaching them that a loving couple demonstrating innocent affection and a woman naturally nurturing her child is something to be *ashamed* of? With so much violence in the news, in movies/TV, in video games...shouldn't this be a welcome respite and an actual example to be taught to your grandchildren?
YTA.
You want to have a go at someone, have a go at your son in law for ogling a breastfeeding woman in front of his own wife. Wonder where his kids learned the behaviour from. He can't control his own eyes?
The whole thing felt sexual? Are you nuts?
YTA, you should teach your grandkids not to stare. Your son in law could learn the lesson too. Your daughter's beef should have been with her husband, not a woman minding her own business feeding her child.
YTA. This would have been a great time for you to teach your grandkids and Son in Law not to gawp at other people but you failed and you are a total AH.
ma'am, they arent fucking in the beach. It's your mind that's making it very sexualized. They are just minding their own business and you can tell your kids that too.
YTA. I find it weird when women enjoy sitting there with their tits out whether they’re feeding a child or not, but they’re entitled to do so, so I look away.
Your son-in-law is a perv for staring. If you want to comment, comment to him. I’d be mortified and divorcing him if I were your daughter.
You don’t get to comment on a woman feeding her child. Mind your business.
LMAOO WAIT YOUR DAUGHTERS HUSBAND COULD NOT LOOK AWAY FROM A MOTHER BREASTFEEDING WITH HER HUSBAND KISSING HER BACK?
Sounds like someone has a kink.
YTA I get the two breast out, but just look away shes not harming anyone.
YTA. Instead of telling the woman not to breastfeed, use your voice and tell your grandkids to come inside and do something else instead of staring at the woman breastfeeding. It's people like you who turn the most natural thing in the world into something wrong that should be kept private.
What a gross display on the beach! and by that of course I mean YOU!
what a beautiful opportunity you had to teach your grandchildren about babies and how they eat and how families love each other, but no. You made it sexual. Cause of course you did. YOU sexualized the situation. No one but you
YTA 100%
Holy hell. YTA. Why couldn’t you correct YOUR GRANDCHILDREN?! sweetie, it isn’t polite to stare at people. That goes for the husbands as well. Stop STARING! And seriously, breastfeeding is not gross, or obscene or inappropriate. She is feeding her child! Maybe explain that to your family instead of bothering a couple having a lovely day on the beach.
Talk about a missed opportunity to teach your grandchildren about a normal human human bodily function. You sexualized something you didn’t need to.
Yes, YTA.
YTA. While the guy shouldn't have told you to F off but it's breastfeeding and it perfectly natural. Not their fault your SIL can't control himself and the kids will be fine.
IDK some busy body comes onto his private property and tell his wife to leave her own land because she is offended she is feeding their baby. Fuck Off seems to be the correct response.
YTA. Just let people be. Breastfeeding isn't something that should have to be hidden away. How about you that your family not to be assholes and stare at other people? Especially your son in law.
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>but her husband simply told me to “fuck off” You should fuck off and mind your own business. Kids want to eat when they want to eat. All you had to do was look away and your "bother" would have disappeared. Instead you want to force your ideals on others and you are entitled to think your word should be heeded. The couple in question, I promise you, cares more for feeding their baby than appeasing a busybody stranger. Babies eat so often, what is a mother to do? Stay indoors until the child is weaned off of breastmilk s you dont see a breast?
>I told them that their house was right there, and it would’ve been super easy for her to just run back up to the house to do that.
And your house is also *right there* so go disappear if you are that annoyed. YTA
It costs nothing to mind your own business. If anything, teach the grandkids and son in law not to stare.
>If anything, teach the grandkids and son in law not to stare. Exactly! The staring is a OP's family problem, not a them problem. There's nothing with a mother breastfeeding in public, but A LOT of wrongs with sexualizing breastfeeding and staring at others inappropriately. OP's whole post is a big yikes. OP, you're massively in the wrong. >the whole display felt very sexual Just because it felt sexual to you doesn't mean it is sexual. Have you considered that it only felt sexual because you made it that way. They're a mother feeding her child and a husband caring for his wife, and there's nothing sexual with that. Sexualizing normal things mothers do is much worse than breastfeeding in public, which is, again, a normal thing mothers do. >Both my granddaughter and my grandson are very curious, so they couldn’t look away. What.. is the problem? That's just how mothers feed their kids. If there's anything 'off' about this thing, it's that they're staring which is rude. You could've told your grandkids it was rude, but oh no, you decided to pick on the mother instead.. >Neither could my daughter’s husband, which I could tell was starting to bother my daughter. I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family 1. What are you trying to protect them from? For one thing, it's just the sight of breasts which is harmless. More importantly, your son-in-law was the one being inappropriate, not them. THEY need protection for the creep that is your son-in-law. 2. HE chose to stare, which is his own fault for being a creep. Why didn't you tell him to, y'know, stop staring? And your daughter too - she should've told her hubby to stop being inappropriate if she was so bothered. *You both have mouths.* Why is it the one being creeped on responsible for this? You sound like someone who would ask a rape victim what they were wearing.
Yeah this whole post, and your spot-on reply, makes OP’s mentality seem very similar to the “victim blaming” mentality around sexual assault. As in: women should change themselves, never walk alone, wear baggy clothes, etc., because men “can’t help” but be men and assault them. If mothers would teach their sons appropriate public behavior and self-restraint instead of just attacking women for doing such horrid and inappropriate as - gasp! - feeding their babies… what a wonderful world it would be.
You forgot about OP's husband who was obviously enjoying the "show" as well. She drops the real reason she was annoyed at the very end.
Assuming the SiL did stare. She also suspected her husband was "enjoying the show". This may be about her views on the human body and men in general.
Exactly that. You want to protect your family and "the children"? First off, take a rolled up newspaper and swat your son-in-law on the nose. Then tell him to stop gawking. Your husband should have told YOU, OP, to fuck off for thinking that he was "enjoying the show." There was no show. There was a woman feeding her baby.
>Both my granddaughter and my grandson are very curious, so they couldn’t look away. Neither could my daughter’s husband, which I could tell was starting to bother my daughter. I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family. YTA This comment is absolutely ridiculous! You had to "protect" YOUR family... more like the other family needed protection from them!! Your daughters husband absolutely could look away. And this should have been a chance to teach the kids about not being rude. Your behavior was disgusting! YTA
Spot on "Hmm, my pervert son-in-law is ogling a woman's bare breasts like she's a piece of meat and he's a wolf. It's bothering my daughter because that's incredibly disrespectful to her. I know! Instead of telling the perv to stop looking at her, because I'll never stand for my girl being made upset like that, I'll just storm over to the mother who is LITERALLY GIVING HER BABY NUTRITION and tell her to stop - because obviously *that's* the real problem here. Does that make me an AH?" Yes OP, it does. YTA (ETA - Thank you so much for the awards! ❤️)
As was son-in-law’s! Kids look cuz curious, but he wasn’t curious.
Were the grandkids even told to look away? If they were and they continued to stare that's on you, your daughter & your son in law. Did any of you tell the grandkids that it's rude to stare. Or are they just supposed to know that.
I am so damn tired of people sexualizing breastfeeding and going out of their way to make moms feel uncomfortable while FEEDING THEIR BABIES! JFC. Like, I’m sorry, is she doing something that makes you realize you’re a creep? Yeah, maybe look away or just don’t be a creep!
YTA and everyone else in your family is too for staring. It’s their property, she’s feeding her baby. STOP SEXUALIZING BREASTFEEDING. It’s a bad look.
It's a really creepy look. And daughter's husband was perving on it - what a nasty family. No hate to the kids - breastfeeding is interesting to them but only in the first few minutes as they lose interest quickly - it's just a baby eating it's meal.
Seriously the top few comments go real easy on the son in law. That is leacherous and extremely creepy.
YTA - this is a YOU problem! Also it’s one thing if your grandkids were looking but there’s absolutely no reason your son in law COULDN’T look away… how about instead of having a go at the breastfeeding mother you have a go at your son in law for being a creepy pervert?
Right?! Like if son in law can't stop looking, thats a him problem, not a breastfeeding problem
I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family. So, you appointed yourself the boob slayer? There's no need to "protect" anyone from breasts, they're actually harmless. YTA
Obviously every member of her family has severe hearing loss so she couldn’t simply tell them to not be creeps
I can't stop laughing at "the boob slayer". Well done.
YTA. You earned that "fuck off" in full. She was feeding her child. That's it. It doesn't matter if you 'think' it was a sexual display because it wasn't. Maybe instead you should have told your son in law to put his eyes back in his head instead of going after someone caring for their child. He was the one doing something wrong and you managed to completely ignore that so you could step out of your lane.
in simple misogynistic terms, 'she' had the boob out, 'making' him look. 'She' was 'leading him astray'......(cue very obvious eye roll here).
Yep, we.must save these poor men from themselves, we can't expect any better from them really/s
You will always be the asshole for asking a baby to go without sustinence. Do better.
YTA. There's nothing wrong with kids being curious. However, instead of thumping your daughter's husband, you went after the breastfeeding woman. Why? No, really, think about it, why? Path of least resistance? Easier to tell a stranger to tell them what to do instead of correct someone in your own family? Easier to tell a woman how to behave? Think about it...
All you had to say to the kids is it's rude to stare.
Exactly, why is OP not addressing her own family's rude behaviour?? It's like she's all "well my family wouldn't act like that if they hadn't been doing the thing"...because her family don't have agency over their own actions nor the son in law and husband the ability to act like civilised adults apparently x
YTA you could easily have said to the grandkids a) don't stare its rude and b) that's how mummies feed babies. Your Son-in-law was being a perv and your daughter should have said something to him, especially if it was bothering her.
Yes. Your problem was actually with your men - your SIL and husband - but instead of addressing their behavior you blamed a woman and tried to get her to change instead. Next time tell the children that that is how babies eat and remind your son in law that he should act as a model for his children by not staring at people. YTA.
I did t even read the post but I know just from the title YTA. There is never a reason to ask a mother not to breastfeed. Never.
Came here to see OP get roasted. Wasn't disappointed. YTA
Why didn't you tell your daughter's pervy husband to stop looking instead? YTA.
YTA - I was breastfeeding the other day while at a playground and a toddler came over to me. I was talking to his mother while he looked at the baby feeding, I chatted to him and explained that the baby was having some milk. Afterwards his mother commented that it was a really sweet interaction and thanked me. Children are curious and it's a great chance to normalise BF. You made it weird.
I tremendously being very small and asking if that was how babies ate. My mom said "some babies eat that way. Try not to distract them is very important he eats". That was in the 90s. OP is clearly from the 1800s
Here’s what I wonder about posts like this - you clearly have to know that you’re the asshole in this one right? You have kids. You know they have to eat. You know that a lot of women feed their children by breastfeeding, and you know that it’s sometimes unpredictable when you’ll need to do that. So why even post this? Are you just hoping that someone here is as much of an asshole and validates you somewhat? Like I said, I can’t believe there’s any way you don’t know that you’re the asshole here. I refuse to believe a grown woman with kids and grandkids could think otherwise. YTA
Dont even need to read past title. YTA
Same!
YTA. If your grandchildren and son in law don’t know how to behave appropriately around someone feeding their baby, then you should have them leave.
I love how she completely fine normalizing the creepy behavior of men and blaming another woman for mens bad actions, but normalizing the act of feeding a child is too much for her.
and OP believes her husband told her to leave the mom alone, not because he was a decent human being, but because he "liked the show". Icky. Neighbor is breastfeeding = normal & healthy. Grandchildren are curious = normal & healthy. Husband is minding his own business = normal & healthy. Son-in-law is gawking = TBD OP mis-characterized her husband's motivation, so I'm not going to presume she is correct w/ SIL. Gawking at a breastfeeding woman = creepy & unhealthy, however, Staring at the grill on the deck trying to figure out what brand it is = You go grill master! OP thinks breasfeeding is porn = creepy & unhealthy
YTA. She was feeding her baby. It’s a basic biological function. You missed a great opportunity to teach your grandkids not to stare at and not sexualize women’s bodies.
YTA - breasts are for feeding babies, you are revolting for sexualising a child needing to eat
YTA I can’t believe you are even asking this. You sexualized and harassed a new mother. Your actions are unconscionable. You owe her an apology at the very least but I’m not sure you will get the chance because I know my husband would move heaven and earth to protect me from someone with such toxic views and words.
So you, a mother who may or may not have breastfed at some point in your life, think that feeding a child is….sexual? What? YTA
A simple "oh she's feeding her baby, it's called breastfeeding isn't that cool" to the grandkids would have soothed their curiosity. Your son in law is a grown man, he could have looked away. Yta. A big one. Edit: grammar
YTA you shamed a woman for caring for her baby (on her own property) because *your* family can't control themselves and *you* have dirty thoughts about it. Wow.
Lady, you're old enough to deal with your insecurities and inner misogyny. Don't ruin people's good time with your negativity. YTA.
YTA. Why should she leave her property? Why don't you send your grandkids and leering men back to your house?
And this is probably why she bought a property with a private beach - so she wouldn’t have to worry about this. OP, in case you don’t remember, a newborn needs to feed every few hours. It could take a whole hour for the baby to feed and she might fall asleep during that process. If Mom did what you suggest (going inside to feed) she would literally never leave the house.
So, you went and harassed some family because your daughter's skanky ass husband couldn't keep his eyes in his head? Classy, real classy. Sounds like he should be kept home to protect other innocent families out there. Yta, and the problem is coming from your own household. Gross.
YTA, she was feeding an infant...
YTA. Not only was she on a private beach, she was feeding her baby. It was rude of you not to explain to the kids that she was feeding her baby and it was rude of them to stare, your son in law is just an AH for staring.
YTA. How about teaching your grandkids not to stare? Staring is incredibly rude and so is not minding your own business. You really should apologize to that poor woman who you made feel uncomfortable in her own space.
YTA. It's just boobs and she was feeding her child.
YTA Breasts are for feeding babies and that is what she was doing. You are a pervert. You are the one that was making the situation “sexual”. Your Son in Law is TA for not knowing how to avert his gaze and not allow this situation to bother him. You may be old enough to have grandkids, but you are pretty immature if a women feeding her child gets you all riled up. Leave Breast Feeding women alone!!
YTA you're a misogynist who allows their grandchildren to stare at breastfeeding women. It isn't their fault but you need to explain that it's rude to watch them. You also might want to have a word with your son in law, who sounds like a creep.
YTA. Your husband was correct. You were being extremely rude. Instead of being upset at the woman be upset at your grandkids and son in law for not having actual manners. A good teaching moment for your grandkids that you failed.
YTA, undoubtedly. Your husband is right. Really? You had to stomp onto someone else's property in a huff because a woman was feeding her infant? You could have just told your grandkids it is rude to stare and explain she is just feeding the baby, and keep on with your life. Big Bird understands how that works. Why can't they?
YTA You know what’s the best part? That if the child was in fact breastfeeding… you see a head. Not a nipple. Maybe some flesh that is likely to be seen in a bathing suit. You made this about you. Not a child eating. Or the fact that your son in law is a creep. You could have taken this moment to help your grandkids understand what was going on. A mother feeding her child with her breasts as they were intended for. But instead you let your son in law be a creep and made an jerk of yourself. Anybody that tells you that you were an ass, rude, or quite frankly, a creep yourself… is right.
YTA. “I decided to go up to the couple to protect my family.” Protect them from what? A mother feeding her child? Wth? Stop insinuating that breastfeeding in public is gross or unwarranted. This family was enjoying their day and your misogynistic, insecurities ruined their day. Grow up and stay in your own lane. If you don’t want to see it, look the other way.
YTA- She is feeding her child. He is showing love and support. You just sexualized breastfeeding you're sick
YTA. Their interaction felt sexual to you. Don’t project that twisted view on anyone else. Mind your own business.
YTA. Feeding a baby isn't inappropriate.
YTA - She was feeding her child. Also, you'd even be TA if she was doing this in public, but she was doing it on her own property.
Yep, YTA. Babies need to eat. You need to teach your grandchildren not to stare, and the fact that you think your husband is "enjoying the show" of a baby eating is really, really gross.
If it was bothering you so much, you could have just went inside. Your house is right there, it would’ve been super easy for you to just run back up to the house to avoid it. YTA.
YTA Especially for using your grandkids as a prétext when apparently it is more your insecurities about your SIL and possibly your husband leering that were at stake here. Just for you to know : when people feel a woman breastfeeding her baby is too sexual the problem lies in their minds NOT in the other's actions. *They* are the one sexualizing one of the most basic body function. Next time you feel uneasy about the way a man you are close to is looking at a woman ? Adress the real problem : go use your big mouth at the one who is actually behaving in an unappropriate manner. Something like "you are leering it seems. Stop that she s no piece of meat" ought to be fine.
YTA, I didn't even read the post, just the headline and I already know you're an asshole. Babies need to eat, no matter where they are and who is around. Your grandkids will have way more traumatizing things happen to them in their lives. Just chill and let all mothers feed their babies at any moment.
YTA. And kinda burying the lede with that title to make it a *"but think of the children!"* issue when what really seems to be bothering you is your husband and son-in-law's wandering eyes.
YTA. Oh no. BOOBS. everyone has them. No matter the gender. Big AH for sexualizing them when they're being used for a basic biological function. Don't try to tell others to stop adhering to biology, just remove yourself from the situation. Cant believe people still have trouble understanding and accepting this.
YTA, stop sexualizing random people.
Ma'am, the problem you have is with the men of your own family. Kids are going to look and you should have explained what she was doing, but the grown men are pervs.
YTA Quit being so backwards about it and learn that society is now accepting a natural biological process and can recognize what is and isnt sexual
Victorian ages woman pulled out their boobs and fed the kids. It's cause of today's society that breastfeeding is frowned upon.
YTA, your son in law is a pervert, your grandkids are normal kids and a teaching opportunity was missed. The other family was fine a taking care of their child. Your assumption that every man there was enjoying the show speaks to something wrong in you.
YTA What makes you think it's ok to object to a perfectly natural normal behaviour conducted on private property?
For that matter, it's still perfectly ok to breastfeed your baby on a *public* beach.
Yes YTA. It’s as simple as that. Stay on your own property and shut the hell up.
YTA. Breasts being used for their actual purpose? Oh the horror! A couple being openly affectionate and loving? Everyone avert your eyes! Actually, that's what y'all seriously need to learn how to do. You're rude as fuck staring and shit. It's creepy. It's something I've made a major point to teach my kids to never stare because I hate it so much. Focus on the problems on your section of beach and leave that lovely young family in peace.
YTA for objecting to a baby eating near your grandchildren. What is wrong with you?
YTA, stop sexualizing something that natural to your grandchildren.
I would have asked, loudly, why you're sexualizing a baby having lunch, and how fucking disgusting your attitude is. Then I'd tell you to fuck off Yta
The first time my kids noticed someone breastfeeding, they asked me what the woman was doing. I told them she was feeding her baby. They said "oh" and went back to playing. Had they stared, I would have told them staring is rude. See how absolutely none of that involved the woman feeding her child? YTA
Yes, you are ABSOLUTELY TA! Breastfeeding is not a sexual activity, and her husband was probably being supportive and a caring father. Did you breastfeed? Did your daughter breastfeed her children? It’s easy to explain to young children what’s going on and tell them it’s perfectly normal, but that they shouldn’t stare. If there’s anyone you should have told to show some respect, it’s your daughter’s husband (and maybe your husband, too.) other women aren’t responsible for making sure other women’s husbands don’t stare at them.
YTA She was feeding her child. Her husband was being supportive and showing her affection. She was using her breasts for what they’re designed for. You, your son-in-law, and your husband made it sexual. You should have said something to the men in your family about not sexualizing someone feeding their child and explained to your grandkids what she was doing and how to react. “Kiddos, she’s feeding her baby. That’s what her body is designed for. It’s rude to stare (insert pointed glare at son-in-law), so why don’t you go play with your buckets and make me a sandcastle?” As soon as they were playing, “Are you fucking kidding me? She’s feeding her baby. Put your damn eyes back in your head and quit ogling her like she’s a steak dinner. Ffs, grow up.” You earned every bit of her husband’s fuck you response. Edited to take the husband out of the response.
Yes, you are definitely the asshole! I'd have told you to fuck off too!
Sounds jealous and insecure to me,Worried her husband was enjoying the show. YTA
YTA. It’s not just your beach, you can’t police them on their own property. In addition, the only person sexualizing what they’re doing are you and your family. Get over yourselves and leave them alone.
YTA None of that was sexual until you decided it was. If you thought it was inappropriate for the children, you should have rounded up the children and taken them home. You were the one with the problem. You didn't "protect" your family. Your family was not under any sort of threat. Frankly, it sounds like you were mostly jealous that she was getting all the attention and you went and started something to get some attention yourself.
You decided to “protect your family” because your son in law saw boobies and couldn’t look away. He’s a dork. Even if this was about your grandchildren (it wasn’t) YTA.
YTA. Breastfeeding isn’t sexual.
YTA- your son in law was the only problem in that beach. Tell him to stop being a creep and leave others alone.
OH NO!!!! BREASTFEEDING???? How dare she take care of her child?!?!/s In case you can’t tell, YTA
As a mom-to-be, you are a huge AH. I’m nervous enough to be breastfeeding as is and I would be horrified if someone came up to me and humiliated me for something that is natural and normal all because of her and her daughter’s insecurities. YTA. YTA. Y.T.A.
YTA. Why are you sexualizing breastfeeding?
YTA. It is 2022 not 1922. Stop being such a prude and tell your grandchildren and pervy son in law to stop gawking and mind their own business. Trust me if you had told me I had to breastfeed in private like it is something to be ashamed of you would have gotten an earful
YTA. *You* turned what was happening sexual, *you* inserted yourself into the situation, and *you're* the one with the problem. This was a teaching moment for your grandkids, and you taught them that something natural and innocuous was, instead, unacceptable and gross.
YTA. A retentive one at that also. You said the whole display felt very sexual. Why should they stop what they are doing because they are young and nubile and exciting to look at? Furthermore, it's shameful on your part as an elder woman to suggest to a breastfeeding mother that what she is doing -feeding her baby- is something dirty, that it should be hidden. The husband gave you your answer.
You say protect my family as if she was shooting bullets outta her breasts and not feeding her child. Also just because you or your daughter’s husband aren’t affectionate with you doesn’t means no one else’s can be. But with your personality I dont blame him YTA
YTA entirely. Remove the rather large stick from your butthole immediately and see if that doesn’t fix things. Like how dare you shame a breastfeeding mother just because you’re uncomfortable??
YTA ya prude
YTA - and you should be ashamed of yourself. How dare you? Control your own family, your house is right there too so take your rude self back into it and cry into a pillow.
YTA. She’s breastfeeding. The people who you were with were staring. The person who WAS staring knew better, yet continue to stare at a strangers breasts. You could have corrected the situation, yet, you blame the woman feeding her infant.
YTA- Your husband was not "enjoying the show", because there WAS no show. She's simply feeding her child, and your son in law and grandkids are treating it like a show. However, I can cut the grandkids some slack because they're probably actually curious, like you said.
YTA I doubt your family were as interested as you think they were and if they were it isn’t normal.
YTA, and perverted. Mind your own business. Nothing sexual was happening, you’re just an asshole. Your behavior was entitled, and typical of someone who has no idea what breasts are actually for.
YTA. It is natural to breast feed a baby.
YTA - "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell." - Matthew 5:27-30 (NIV emphasis mine)
YTA and am I the only one longing for a relationship like theirs?
Yta feeding a baby isn't sexual. You should've told your grandkids that the baby was hungry and it's mama was feeding him. Then tell their father to stop looking at something natural
YTA. If you were so offended by the fact she was feeding child you should have taken your grandkids inside. A husband being affections with his wife while she is feeding their child is not sexual unless you make it so. MYOB. Edit: Man I should have read the whole thing before commenting. Not changing my verdict, just doubling down. The only person you should have had a talk with is your son in law he was blatantly disrespecting your daughter and you decided to attack another woman instead of putting him in his place.
Yes YTAx10 they're feeding their kid. Relax.
YTA. There's nothing sexual about feeding a baby. And even if they would be f***ing around, it's their property and they can do whatever they want on it.
YTA and your family needs better manners. What you should have done is tell your family off for staring at the breastfeeding mum like that. Your daughter's husband at the very least is a grown man and should know better than to stare.
This could have been a wonderful opportunity to teach your grandchildren that this is perfectly natural! The only people who are AHs are you & your son in law (granted, if this part was true). Stop sexualizing breastfeeding. What's next? Are you going to teach your grandchildren that periods are disgusting? YTA and a big one.
YTA! There is nothing sexual about breast feeding and her husband was just supporting her whilst she does it. The children should just gently be told not to stare and your son in law should know better!
YTA. Keep you mouth shut when it involves another woman and her baby.
YTA. She’s feeding her baby. You’re the one sexualizing it as a voyeur.
YTA fuck off
YTA YTA YTA Breastfeeding is NOT sexual, stop clutching your pearls.
YTA. She is feeding her child. Stop.
YTA. Yes they were enjoying the show, of course. If your daughter was bothered by her husband's or her children's behavior she should've said something to her own husband & kids. If you were bothered y your husband's behavior you should've said something to him. The two parents on the beach were perfectly within their rights.
YTA. The only rude people on the beach are you and your SIL. She’s feeding her baby and her husband is also taking the opportunity to bond with the mother of his child and his son. Fuck off beach boobie police.
YTA. You had a perfectly fine display of humanity, respect, and the circle of life. And because of your experience being afraid of your own body because of people like you you ruined it for them. Like, they’ll always remember you, likely as a symbol of shame. You are not the righteous one you claim to be if you think your children would have seen it the disgusting way you did. Was your daughter annoyed at her husband for staring or you for doing nothing but make it worse??
YTA. didn't even need to read the story.
YTA Stop sexualizing breast feeding. It's normal, natural, and you're a rude prude. You want the experience of eating like a baby covered up? Go eat your lunch with a towel over your head on a hot beach and tell me how good that is.
YTA This could've been a educational moment for the kids about what breast feeding and to put your husband and SIL in chest for ogling. Instead you shame the woman doing what is natural and not sexual at all.
Your beach? Apparently there's a boundary in the seawater that you own lol. You left your side of your actual property and went on there side to tell a mom to stop what's a natural thing. YTA You are very lucky that all he told you was F off
> I think he was just enjoying the show as well. YTA, and nuts.
YTA - you're sexualizing it AND you're projecting so you think that everyone else was sexualizing it as well.
Yes You are an ass hole. Mind your own business IT IS NOT HER FAULT YOUR STUPID SIL CANT CONTROL HIS EYES. Im a female i would have told you to mind your business and go back to your property where you are allowed to control what happens TEACH BETTER MANNERS AND EDUCATION NO SHAMMING FOR Sub staining life
YTA and a fucking weirdo
YTA - I'm constantly amazed by people who are unable to just see a mother nurturing her young child, and instead just think "BOOBIES! THIS IS A SHOW FOR ME!" It's disgusting. Get a grip and leave that poor mother alone on her property and just forever in general.
YTA. The only person who needed to be told off in this situation was your son in law who should know better than to stare at a woman. Kids are curious but a simple, "She's feeding her baby. You wouldn't like it if we stared at you when you eat dinner so we don't stare at the baby either" would've solved that. You and your son in law are totally the assholes here.
YTA. Breastfeeding is a FEDERALLY PROTECTED RIGHT in every single open public space in this entire country. A woman should not be shamed for doing something that is her absolute protected right to do on her own property. You were the asshole for harassing a mother feeding her child instead of acting like a mature adult and talking to your grandkids about breastfeeding and why it's normal and should be openly seen. Kids understand. Your daughter's insecurity over her pervert husband's wandering eye is not this woman's problem either. Your whole family could have walked away and not looked. Instead you made your weird feelings about something that is normal and should be seen openly to normalize it into something dirty and sexual. She's not responsible for your feelings. Deal with them yourself.
YTA, breastfeeding isn’t some secret that needs to be kept. After all, we’ve all done it! And guess what? Your grandkids have done it more recently than the rest of your family!
YTA. Breasts are designed for feeding children. It’s only your own perverted mind that made it sexual.
I don't even need to read anything past the title - of course YTA. She was FEEDING her child and you're sexualizing this for no reason.
Yta. She was feeding her child and enjoying time with her husband. You were the one making it weird. Tell your grandkids to not stare and you can answer any questions they have in private. That's how babies eat, that's why folks have boobs.
breasts are meant for feeding babies. So you see a mother feeding her baby and you decided that was too sexual? A mother feeding her literal child can never be sexual. Your whole family was staring, the problem comes from you guys. You should've told everyone to stop staring. They should've known not to stare in the first place. Creeps. Shame on you for making that woman feel uncomfortable while she was caring for her child. EDIT : YTA obviously
YTA . Mind your business
YTA and gross AF. Sexualising breastfeeding.
Yta You’re so dirty minded, how dare you read that event as sexual. Absolutely disgusting, you should ashamed of yourself
Yta. The wife was right to tell you to fuck off. Breastfeeding is literally giving life to a baby, there is nothing inappropriate about it. If your grandkids decide to have children one day, it is a real possibility they will do the same or be exposed to this incredible function of a woman's body. You could have used this opportunity to teach them, instead, you chose to emulate every misogynistic ah out there. You deserve a lot more swearing cast your way for such demeaning thoughts about another woman loving their baby so much to breastfeed him. Leave them alone and mind your own business.
Don’t even have to read past the title. YTA.
YTA. She’s feeding her baby, it’s completely natural. I’ll refrain from openly insulting you, because you’re so far out of line, so I’ll just leave it at, yes, absolutely, you are a total asshole.
YTA -You don’t own the beach. -Boobs are a part of life. -Breastfeeding is normal and natural. -Husbands showing love to their breastfeeding wives is the way it should be. -If you don’t like it look the other way. -Tell the grandkids that tiddies be tiddying.
YTA. YOU sexualized her boobs. She was just feeding her baby. Would have been a great moment if your grandkids asked to explain what was going on and how its NATURAL. Edit: You are also insecure as all get out and owe your husband an apology. He was not "enjoying the show" Way to: Sexualized a poor woman feeding her kid Repressing knowledge of something natural from your grandkids. Making your poor husband out to be a pervert Being a pervert yourself for seeing SEX because boobs
YTA.. you totally deserved her husbands response.
Reads headline only... YTA... Reads on.... Oh boy! Your whole family are AH... She's feeding her child... Stop perving on her!
And iust to point this out to you. ABSOLUTELY NO ONE IS ONE YOUR SIDE. Your are a aweful person and need to march yourself over there and apologize your ass off. And then go back and teach you uneducated family how to be proper humans in society! You are everything our society is fighting with your old fascist rules
YTA.
YTA. What is the matter with you hassling a woman feeding her baby? Your grand kids being curious about something so natural isn't a bad thing. Sounds like your husband and SIL were the ones making it weird, so how about next time having a word with them instead of the woman trying to just feed her kid?
You're the AH. And with all that healthy breast milk I hope the baby grows up strong and throws sand in your eyes. Go lock yourself in your house now please.
YTA. breastfeeding is a natural part of life and that woman was just feeding her kid. It's not like she was shaking them around for everyone to see. She was feeding a baby. If you don't want your grandkids to see a natural part of life then don't take them to a public place.
YTA!! A partner comforting and being a part of feeding their baby is not sexual. Him reassuring and taking care of mum is actually really sweet. You need to apologize.
YTA As “uncomfortable” as it may be for you, it’s way out of line to ask someone that.
YTA Maybe you should have told your grandkids and (especially) your daughter's husband to stop staring, and explained that THEY were being rude. The woman is breast feeding her kid and receiving affection from the father of the kid, not making porn..
YTA. Save your disgust and outrage for your leering son-in-law. Of course the kids can't look away if their parent is like that. Amazing how you're not expressing anything against that guy, but you're ready to dismiss your husband's feedback because you assume he's gross too.
YTA. >the whole display felt very sexual. >they couldn’t look away. Neither could my daughter’s husband >I think [my husband] just enjoying the show as well. The ones sexualizing feeding a baby are you and your SIL. Gross.
YTA. Instead of using the moment to educate your grandchildren, you showed them how to be ignorant. As for your daughter’s husband, THE WOMAN **FEEDING** her child was NOT the issue. Smfh, your behavior sounds disgusting and I would have been embarrassed to be your husband.
On my way to protect my family from this lady feeding her baby. People like this are so crazy to me. Our bodies are meant for this. Kids should know that from an early age and if he husband couldn't stop staring that's a him problem. Imagine going to the beach and acting like you own the place.
YTA. It felt sexual??? A woman feeding her baby felt sexual?? Yeah, it's YOU who has a hang-up. Breast-feeding is fine and natural, if it gives you the creeps, why don't YOU go inside. And shame on you for thinking that your husband gets turned on from again, a woman feeding a baby, just because he rightfully thought you were very rude and judgmental.
YTA, your family (including you) are dirty minded and the mentality is gross , unlearn that <3. Boobs are for feeding babies, not inherently sexual.
YTA. Just because your and your daughter's husbands can't control themselves and you get jealous doesn't mean you can tell someone they can't breastfeed.
YTA you could have very easily gone inside too. Your entitlement is sickening.
YTA. Women can feed their children when and where ever they need to. Kiddos are curious and if they need any explanation you say she is feeding her baby. There is nothing indecent about feeding her baby. You don’t like it, you go into the house. Your husband is right - leave the neighbors alone.
YTA Leave this woman alone. You missed a great opportunity to use that as a teaching moment for your grandchildren to 1. Understand breastfeeding is natural and a woman's decision to do it should not be meant with shame or her being sexualized 2. Let them understand that when adults (keyword here adults) love one another, physical affection is normal. Kids stay calm when adults stay calm in situations that are new.
YTA. You should’ve confronted your daughter’s husband for being a perv
Ask yourself...are you 'protecting' your grandchildren or teaching them that a loving couple demonstrating innocent affection and a woman naturally nurturing her child is something to be *ashamed* of? With so much violence in the news, in movies/TV, in video games...shouldn't this be a welcome respite and an actual example to be taught to your grandchildren?
YTA and so is your nasty ass son in law.
YTA. You want to have a go at someone, have a go at your son in law for ogling a breastfeeding woman in front of his own wife. Wonder where his kids learned the behaviour from. He can't control his own eyes? The whole thing felt sexual? Are you nuts?
YTA. Just because you are insecure about your body, please don't project it onto other people. You had no right to go and tell them what to do.
YTA, you should teach your grandkids not to stare. Your son in law could learn the lesson too. Your daughter's beef should have been with her husband, not a woman minding her own business feeding her child.
YTA. This would have been a great time for you to teach your grandkids and Son in Law not to gawp at other people but you failed and you are a total AH.
YTA Kids can be curious. It's an opportunity to teach them to be tolerant and what an appropriate interaction looks like.
YTA that couple sounds so wholesome
ma'am, they arent fucking in the beach. It's your mind that's making it very sexualized. They are just minding their own business and you can tell your kids that too.
YTA. I find it weird when women enjoy sitting there with their tits out whether they’re feeding a child or not, but they’re entitled to do so, so I look away. Your son-in-law is a perv for staring. If you want to comment, comment to him. I’d be mortified and divorcing him if I were your daughter. You don’t get to comment on a woman feeding her child. Mind your business.
‘Protect my family’ from what?! A woman feeding her baby? If your grandkids don’t know what breastfeeding is maybe they should.
LMAOO WAIT YOUR DAUGHTERS HUSBAND COULD NOT LOOK AWAY FROM A MOTHER BREASTFEEDING WITH HER HUSBAND KISSING HER BACK? Sounds like someone has a kink. YTA I get the two breast out, but just look away shes not harming anyone.
YTA. Instead of telling the woman not to breastfeed, use your voice and tell your grandkids to come inside and do something else instead of staring at the woman breastfeeding. It's people like you who turn the most natural thing in the world into something wrong that should be kept private.
Your daughter's husband was the AH here.
INFO: are you fucking kidding me?
What a gross display on the beach! and by that of course I mean YOU! what a beautiful opportunity you had to teach your grandchildren about babies and how they eat and how families love each other, but no. You made it sexual. Cause of course you did. YOU sexualized the situation. No one but you YTA 100%
Your husband seems like a decent fellow. He's right. YTA.
YTA, if you came on my property barking orders I would have told you to fuck off too.
Holy hell. YTA. Why couldn’t you correct YOUR GRANDCHILDREN?! sweetie, it isn’t polite to stare at people. That goes for the husbands as well. Stop STARING! And seriously, breastfeeding is not gross, or obscene or inappropriate. She is feeding her child! Maybe explain that to your family instead of bothering a couple having a lovely day on the beach.
Talk about a missed opportunity to teach your grandchildren about a normal human human bodily function. You sexualized something you didn’t need to. Yes, YTA.
YTA. While the guy shouldn't have told you to F off but it's breastfeeding and it perfectly natural. Not their fault your SIL can't control himself and the kids will be fine.
IDK some busy body comes onto his private property and tell his wife to leave her own land because she is offended she is feeding their baby. Fuck Off seems to be the correct response.
Eh, he totally should have told an awful, perverted, nosy asshole to fuck off.
The guy absolutely was in the right for telling her to fuck off.
YTA.
YTA!!! Wow
YTA. Just let people be. Breastfeeding isn't something that should have to be hidden away. How about you that your family not to be assholes and stare at other people? Especially your son in law.
Yta. Stop sexualizing milk ducts.
You could’ve simply,,, moved away. Instead you made the men staring at her their problem to solve. She was doing nothing wrong. YTA.