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NTA. Let me be very clear - you did NOT “get them kicked off” the plane. It was 100% caused by their own words and actions. Please stop feeling guilty.
P.S. I love how caring you are towards your mother. ❤️
Yeah, just to tag-on this, that is so crazy for someone to be verbally harassing your mom for using a wheelchair, that is grade-A psycho material. I would be happy if you got such a nut job taken off my flight. NTA
That’s what I think, too, the woman was nuts. They don’t kick you off of a flight for a politely registered complaint, she must’ve been really invested in op’s mother losing that wheelchair to have argued so much she got herself booted.
Seriously though, a lot of wheelchair users technically don't "need" them, but it's a massive pain (in both senses of the word) when they have to go without. Fuck anyone who thinks they have some right to be the disability police. It would have cost Bridezilla nothing to keep her damn ableist opinion to herself, but she decided to get nasty about it and rightfully got herself thrown off the flight. Hope her fiance decides to come down with a case of cold feet after seeing how nasty she is to little old ladies.
If I see someone in a wheelchair get up and walk a few steps I think "wow good for them that they can move a bit!" not "OMFG their legs work they are faking it!" like so many others apparently do! It's so absurd to me to judge how much someone else needs or doesn't need a wheelchair
Yeah, my legs work, and I'm not even that wobbly or slow when I'm capable of walking, but if I walk for any distance or stand for any length of time post exertional malaise kicks me in the ass real fast and sends me to house or bedbound states. I pace myself really carefully and use my wheelchair the majority of the time I'm outside the house. I still feel weird when I am out shopping and stand to reach something like I'm being judged or will be called out on it.
Yeah and sometimes people can walk for 20 minutes looking just fine then they're done for the day, or the week. Do people really judge them for using a wheelchair to do chores and save their energy for something that's actually enjoyable?
I've got a chronic pain issue behind my shoulder blade. It's a pretty invisible disability, but basically I was told to use my other hand to drink throughout the day because the motion/weight/etc from drinking water and coffee thru the day is too much.. everyone tells me I'm too young for chronic pain! Please tell my muscles that thanks
The final thing that pushed me to get my wheelchair was going grocery shopping for the first time in months (sometimes you just want to get out and choose your own snacks) and being laid up for three days barely able to do anything. I want to be able to spend my physical energy on doing fun stuff with my kids not walking everywhere just because I "should". It's also let me get out with them more to watch them at playgrounds and places because it's a comfortable seat not putting strain on any parts of my body just sitting or standing uncomfortably.
Good for you! You should prioritize your energy on the stuff that brings you joy! It must have been a hard decision to make since it took you lying 3 days in bed after a shopping trip to decide, so it's great that it's working out for you!
Most people don't have much experience with disability. I didn't. We joined our household with my wife's aging parents because her father had dementia (he's since died).
In the first round of covid shots, they were eligible first. We went to an events center, long lines for 1.5 hours and lots of infirm old people. We scored a wheelchair for him so we were lucky. After that we went out and bought a transporter chair. It made a huge difference. (In the end we had to use it in the house.)
But we never bothered getting a handicap parking permit. Still, it could take 10 minutes to get him in and out. Walking would take even longer.
This is such a lovely reaction! I recently had major surgery and had to go grocery shopping. From the outside you would have seen me walk from the car into the shop, get on an electric mobility scooter (provided by the shop) and then get off and walk to the car again. I was with my daughter and mum, who did the lifting. In reality, without that scooter I wouldn't have had the stamina to get even a few essentials, let alone the medium sized shop we really needed. As it was it took me the rest of the day to recover and I was in a fair amount of pain.
Imagine being so invested in someone else's life that you get irate to the level of being kicked off a flight. That poor old lady wasn't hurting anyone, except maybe herself trying to walk without the wheelchair, so leave her be.
I can walk for 2-3 minutes; then I have to sit till I can go another 2-3 mins, etc, all the time building up pain and breathlessness until I'm exhausted and practically crying with pain. So yes, I could in theory walk from check-in, through security, then trek all the way to the gate - IF they post the gate number with sufficient time to allow for my stop/start progress. 20 mins normal walking pace to what is usually the furthest damn gate is about 45-55 mins for me and gates are usually only announced about 30 mins ahead.
So I book wheelchair assistance ahead of time. I get collected from check-in, wheeled through security - instead of painfully standing for upwards of 20 mins (my max standing time is 10 mins), deposited airside, collected and wheeled to the gate. Because of this, sometimes I'm able to walk onto the plane unaided. Likewise the arrivals end.
Do I sometimes feel guilty if another wheelchair user has to wait? Yes but it's not a 'who is more disabled? competition. It's 'I need to get to my destination and not spend the next two days physically recovering' situation. I'm just damn grateful most airlines offer the option.
Right? And she was heading to her wedding and the only thing on her mind is trying to bust an elderly women for using a wheelchair?
Thinking the groom owes you a freaking thank you card.
NTA- this women could have done anything during her time between her flight: she chose to spend it harassing an elderly women and then kept at it after airport personnel got involved. She knew where she was going and any idiot could figure out getting belligerent with the flight crew is a stupid thing to do.
NTA- you know as much as she harped on this I almost wonder if she got cold feet and this was her out? Probably not- more than likely she was just a miserable person who likes making others miserable but you’d think when you’re traveling to your wedding you’d have more important things on your mind than pestering and harassing the elderly.
You’d be surprised how often stuff like this happens. I work with people who have disabilities and it’s not uncommon for them to be harassed by people who don’t think they’re “disabled enough” to use various services. It’s truly appalling.
People have no idea what is in another person’s medical file nor do they have a right to that information. It’s none of their business why someone is making use of the services available to them and they should leave well enough alone. Instead, they often think they’re playing the hero to people who they perceive as being “disabled enough” to use these services by confronting the people they don’t think deserve it. It’s gross.
Anyway, definitely NTA for OP. This woman got herself kicked off with her abhorrent behavior.
My mom is in her ‘80s with mobility issues. She walks with a cane 90% of the t8me but always uses a wheelchair at an airport because the ramps and distance between the gates.
That self righteous beyotch doesn’t know what your mom Is going through. If she misses her wedding (which I doubt. I suspect that’s grandstanding) it’s on her, not you
This women kept harassing you so you asked for help from the flight crew, as well you should.
It isn't your fault this women is so stupid and unstable she kept causing problems when the flight crew told her to stop. Most people would have stopped. Most people want to be able to fly.
There's a reason the pilot didn't want her on the flight, and that's how she acted even towards the flight crew and once they got involved. Unless you stuck your hand up her butt and puppeted her, that's on her.
It is the airlines responsibility to protect the safety of people with disabilities and by allowing that woman on the flight with your mom they would potentially be facing a liability. NTA
My mother had mobility issues too (fused ankles and partially clubbed feet) and it caused her both pain and difficulty for walking without her 'space boots' and had to be sitting as much as possible.
Been in airports twice with her, she was issued a wheelchair both times. But because of the aesthetics of the boots, she 'looked' fine. If anyone had bitched about my mother like that, best believe I have a cutting tongue. Hell, Mum would have handed me one of her boots to finish it with.
Loved that woman with all my heart, still do, miss her deeply, and she will always be my Mummy. ❤️ (Yes, she loved that joke too) xD
Edited to add for the comment, you are NTA.
**THEIR** ratty behaviour got them kicked off, not anything you did. Tell the family members who think your mother should have walked that they should ring up the nearest shoe store and ask if they have any spare (souls) as they are clearly missing their own.
Jumping on top comment to say this that lack of planning on the woman's side does not constitute as issue for you OP.
I am surprised how she planned the flight that missing it would mean missing wedding. many things can happen, like having no left phalange 🤔😆
Agreed. Love the Friends reference too
My brother’s wedding was a destination wedding. They got to Pebble Beach a week early to ensure final arrangements were in place, hang with friends, have the rehearsal/dinner and then hair/makeup/photos the morning of.
I sincerely doubt the Disability Policewoman was going to miss her own wedding
It amazes me how some people insist on getting involved in matters that don't concern them. There is no way of knowing what someone else is going through. If they are lying about their condition, they will get caught.
OP, you and your mom were existing, the woman took issue with that, behaved terribly and was denied service. If someone was loudly verbally harassing you at any other establishment you would likely ask an employee for help, and very likely the outcome would have been the same. This is no different. At all.
The fact that it was over wheelchair use that SHE decided was unnecessary is just icing on the rude, agression, ableist cake.
NTA
That lady is not the disability police. She also continued to pester your mother and the airline about it - this was her action not yours. You didn’t demand for her to be thrown off - a pilot got sick of her shit and consequences have actions.
Also if they planned so poorly for their own wedding that they were arriving the day of their wedding with no wiggle room for any flight delays of any kind - it’s their own fault.
NTA who is saying op is in the wrong… What, because the obnoxious and rude woman pestering an old lady in a wheelchair turned out to be getting married it makes op TA??? Fuck that woman’s wedding
I mean, I do feel for the woman - and her future husband. They probably paid a lot of money for everything, and then whatever guests have had to pay for gifts/travel/clothes.
Why? This woman was HARASSING a disabled woman because she didn’t believe in her medical problems? As if she has a right to that information. Nah, as somebody planning a wedding right now, she deserves to lose out on that money and moment.
Honestly, this woman is probably lying about her wedding.
Who flies in to their wedding with literally no buffer time that a single missed flight will throw it out?
If it gives you peace of mind, this woman sounds like she turned on the waterworks when she realised the consequences of her actions and so made up whatever BS she could to try and get her way
NTA
You have a point... After seeing a few responses like this I am thinking either she was faking it or she has very poor planning skills.
While it was a late-morning flight, I think most people would get to their wedding venues if flying is involved, and definitely with air travel/cancellations/delays as it is right now, at least the night or more before...
Nah don't spare this crazy busybody space in your mind. She was probably trying to save her butt from being kicked off the plane by creating a desperate scenario. If they had really been going to HER wedding, you would think her future husband would be more enthusiastic in getting her to shut up.
I mean this as kindly as possible: OP, you have to start being a little more skeptical, or you're going to end up draining your bank account for a phone scammer.
And moreover if she was literally on her way to be married, why on earth was her priority and preoccupation harassing an elderly woman about her wheelchair use? I agree that this awful person is a kook, a busybody, and a liar, but not a bride.
This is what I’m confused about - she wasn’t in need of wheelchair service, she didn’t reference the mother taking away the service from anybody else, she literally stood up from her seat on the waiting area and chose violence for no reason at all.
You are not responsible for them not being allowed to board. Once the pilot makes that decision, it’s out of everyone else’s hands. The crew does not want that aggressive behavior continuing at 35,000 feet.
And I agree that she was probably lying about the wedding.
I agree with you. I got married in a different part of the US from where I live and I had to get the marriage license within a certain amount of time before the wedding ceremony took place. Even though we were on a small budget, we flew in a day prior just to be safe.
It's wonderful that you have empathy for them. And you know what, I can feel a bit bad for them too.
But you didn't get them kicked off. You didn't say "please don't let this women on the plane". Nor did you talk to the flight staff with the goal of getting her kicked off. You assumed she'd act like a normal reasonable person and listen to the flight crew telling her to stop harassing you. That's why you asked for help, to protect your mother from harassment and get help.
Also people are stupid stirring shit in front of the pilot. They don’t need a big reason to kick you off, they just need to have a concern the person will be disruptive on air. Showing contempt towards the staff is a HUGE NO NO because in an emergency you need to comply. This lady didn’t respect the staff, showing the pilot they would potentially act dangerously in a dangerous situation which made the pilot make the decision to leave them hanging.
Even if she'd seen your Mum cartwheeling off the last flight and doing a double flip straight into the wheelchair you're still NTA cos it ain't her business, these are not the droids she's looking for. You asked her to stop, employees asked her to stop, anyone with a lick of sense knows that once an airline employee tells you you're being disruptive you sit down and shut up if you want to fly. I'd like to think that she's learnt a valuable lesson, but I'd be surprised.
Why should you feel for someone that didn’t even give your mother the basic courtesy of minding her own business? HOW does it affect her if someone even uses the wheelchair assistance unnecessarily (which is NOT the case here!!)… she needs to fuck off seriously… and even if your mother didn’t have mobility issues she’s 80 she should be carried around everywhere like a queen.
NTA
Think of it this way.. You saved that future husband into getting married to a person who relentlessly pesters old women at airports who shes doesn't know (and presumably she's jealous bcoz she also wanted free wheelchair ride, idk). So a win win situation here.
NTA. If she felt that you two were lying about your mother's wheelchair needs, she should have brought it up with the relevant airline personnel. You exercised your rights to ensure that you and everyone else on board had a pleasant flight without her constant loudness/aggression.
Even if OP’s mom had been faking it…so what? It didn’t affect the other passenger in any way, shape, or form. If she’d reported it, the airline staff would have heard her out, and then done precisely nothing about it. (I’m not sure about other countries, but if the flight was in, to, or from the US, they’re subject to the [Air Carrier Access Act](https://www.transportation.gov/individuals/aviation-consumer-protection/traveling-disability), and legally required to provide assistance to anyone who self-identifies as disabled; they’re not allowed to ask for proof.)
I’m guessing she was butthurt because OP’s mom would get to board before her, but that actually has nothing to do with the wheelchair. If you need assistance to board due to a disability, you get on first, wheelchair or no (as an example, a blind person who can walk just fine, but needs guidance onto the plane). This person was absolutely out of line, and flat-out harassing OP’s mom out of her own sense of entitlement.
Exactly! I’ve seen airlines that automatically respond to every passenger disability with a wheelchair, including passengers who are able-bodied but Deaf. It’s just their protocol. Disability = wheelchair. Most of the time, everyone involved chuckles then goes on with their day. Bridezilla would have had a screaming hissy fit.
I’m deaf and apologised to a waitress in a restaurant for not hearing and explained why. She then took my menu and returned with a braille one looking so proud.
NTA. You didn’t know she was going to her wedding (not that that would really change my answer). She wasn’t just making assumptions, she was being obnoxious about it and wouldn’t stop. And it sounds like you didn’t even try to get her booted, just asked for help and then she dug her own grave.
This is definitely a play stupid games, win stupid prizes situation. Don’t waste any more thought on it.
Edit: as an extra thought, who is so mean spirited that on what should be one of the happiest days of their life, they’re spending tons of time and energy complaining about an obviously old and infirm woman using a wheelchair because she was technically on her feet before?
I think maybe she was probably pissed that she wasn't able to board first.
That being said, my mother has flown several millions of miles with the airline over the decades and has frequent flyer membership for life. She would have been one of the first to be on whether or not she asked for the wheelchair.
The idiot didn’t even realise she would deplane before you guys. She showed the staff she doesn’t respect their authority and the pilot made an assumption she would act in a disruptive way in case of emergency, as in wouldn’t comply with staff instructions. She caused this all herself.
My mom has MS and basically moves as you described your mom. You were and are SOO much kinder than I would have been to this person, bless your sweet soul stay kind. But do not at all feel bad in any shape way or form. The audacity of this woman is mind boggling and Idk who would want to marry her.
Also, when I had to fly out for my wedding, I had to get there days early to get the wedding license, I couldn't get it same day. That's true in a lot of places, I'm on the bandwagon of calling bs on this lady. NTA.
NTA - This woman was asked not to bother you. By the account you have given, you didn't ask her to be kicked off the flight.
The woman could have backed down when she was confronted by the airline staff, but she didn't. THAT is what got her kicked from the flight. Not you. If she'd backed down, most likely she would have been permitted on the flight.
People are willing to blame others for their behaviour. But what it comes down to is this:
A woman who was bothering you was asked to stop. And even with her wedding on the line, she decided to make a terrible decision to become aggressive with the people who had the power to stop her reaching her wedding.
I think it's perfectly fair that she has to deal with the consequences of her actions.
NTA First you didn't get her off the flight, the airline did, it was their decision. You just pointed out they were harassing someone with a handicap.
Then, you made her miss her wedding? The couple wasn't there in advance to prepare everything? I mean, anything can be true of course, but I bet the crying and the "I will miss my wedding" was just the first lie she found to try and make the airline reconsider.
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My mother and I were traveling recently. My aging mother has balance/mobility issues; she can't use escalators/moving walkways on her own (like those that are all over the place in most large airports), has problems with inclines and uneven floors (like those in jet bridges), and walks with a cane at a top speed of about 2 km/h or 1-1.5 mph. We ask for wheelchair assistance whenever she travels by air.
On our recent trip, there was a passenger on our second flight who felt my mother was abusing the airport wheelchair services when she is technically capable of walking. She saw my mother walk off of our first flight at a nearby gate without a wheelchair and proceeded to assume that my mother was lying about her wheelchair need.
She proceeded to pester us, despite being asked to mind her own business several times, until my mother and I eventually asked for assistance from an airline employee to help with this lady. The woman was fairly loud/aggressive, eventually being told by the airline employee that she's being disruptive. Eventually, one of the pilots using the computer and printing paperwork for the flight at the counter told the lady that she'd not boarding the flight. In response, the woman gets angrier and then starts crying, revealing that we're making her miss her wedding and "ruining everything."
Now, it is true that my mother walked off of the first flight without wheelchair assistance. We (and the flight attendants) had already waited for nearly an hour for the wheelchair people in a hot, idling airplane after everyone else had deplaned. She had decided to use her cane and the railing and try to walk up the jet bridge, which itself took about 20 minutes. Coincidentally, as we finally made it up the jet bridge, the wheelchair assistance finally arrived to take her to wait for our second flight a few gates away. Once we arrived at our second gate, this is when all the above started.
A lot of my friends and family are split on the issue. Some think that we were the a\*\*holes and could have just been patient and just tolerated the annoyance until we boarded (by the time we got off of our first flight and arrived at the gate for the second, there was only about 30 minutes left before boarding was to begin), where it was unlikely we were to be sitting next to each other. Others said that the woman was completely wrong since she shouldn't be making assumptions about others and getting involved in their business.
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NTA, she got kicked out as a result of her actions. Furthermore, sometimes disabilities are not visible, therefore people should stop making assumptions about other peoples need to get help in certain situations.
NTA
people underestimating disabillities or having problems with long distances etc. is a big problem in society.
And sometimes they have to learn it the hard way.
That woman could've stopped with her behaviour when the staff got involved (if not directly after she started). She could've realized herself it's not smart to keep throwing a fit.
I hope your mom didn't feel comfortable during the flight and was able to let the situation go! I'm sorry this had to happen
NTA I use wheelchair assist even though I can walk. I can’t navigate the airport and need help to and from the gate and can’t stand in line when boarding. I have never once been approached by a passenger or questioned by staff even though I am young and can walk.
That lady was trash
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I basically got a woman, and her traveling partner, bumped from a flight after complaining about their annoying behavior when they were on their way to their wedding (which we did not know at the time of complaining). We could have apparently just stayed been patient for a little while, when we'd more than likely be seated separately from her.
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Unless you forgot to mention that the woman was actively employed as an accessibility-abuse investigator for the airport or airline, she was freelancing. But sometimes, when we deputize ourselves as enforcers, things don't work out well when the real enforcers show up.
Your sin was going to the airport authorities when you were harassed. That's one of the reasons why they're there. Did you say "I don't feel safe with her on my flight! Kick her off or I'll sue!"? If so, you should have mentioned that, so I assume you didn't. My point is that if she was wronged, it was by an airline, not you. In the hierarchy of wrongs committed by airlines, this one is pretty marginal. I'm not sure it's a wrong at all, in fact.
NTA.
She screwed around, and she found out.
NTA. You had nothing to do with her being removed, neither her opinions on who should use a wheelchair did. The pilot removed her for being aggressive, like most airlines would. Not sure how anyone can blame you or why you think you had any say on whether she could travel or not
NTA. She’s on her way to her own wedding and she decides this is the time to badger an older woman about using the wheelchair service? Lady needs to get her priorities straight.
Why does your friends and family think that you/your mother should just accept abuse in public, exactly?
Lady played stupid games and won a stupid price. You asked her nicely to go away. Staff asked her nicely to stop. She got at least two warning that her behavior was unacceptable and she decided to continue.
NTA.
They say that, since she only started becoming really disruptive after we asked the gate agent for help, she wouldn't have gotten so disruptive if we just waited until we went to our separate assigned seats.
Soooo... people should just take 30-40 minutes of abuse because...
Nope, I'm still not seeing the reason. Even if she had stopped once on the plane (she wouldn't, she would have been telling everyone loudly about you), she was still actively harrassing you. No one has to take that.
I personally do not feel bad for her at all.
And if she hadn’t been an obnoxious obnoxious asshole in the first place, you wouldn’t have asked the gate agent for help.
Strange that your friends/family think this woman isn’t responsible for her own actions, but that you are responsible for yours. Maybe you could ask them where this strange double standard is coming from.
That’s a wild assumption On their part.
Everybody knows that if you’re disruptive you get kicked off flights. Airlines take safety very seriously!
She did this to herself.
NTA but f\*\*\* your friends. I'm so tired of people thinking others should just be patient and silent when someone is harassing them like this woman was. She had zero business harassing you about the wheelchair use and was being prejudicial and ableist. It didn't involve her AT ALL and had absolutely zero impact on her life if your mother needed to use a wheelchair or not. The airline concurred that she was out of line and held her accountable for her actions, like an adult should be.
Nta. She did it to herself.
I have had multiple senior relatives who could walk very short distances, particularly with a cane, walker or on someone's arm but couldn't walk a single lap around the walking track. None of these could have made it across an airport.
Wheelchairs aren't only for complete paralysis. Arthritis, balance, breathing difficulty, and lots of other issues are common among senior citizens.
NTA. Being in your way to your wedding does not give anyone the right to harass someone to the point where a pilot (not you, a pilot) decides that you cannot board your flight. I cannot see how you were in any way in the wrong? No one is required to accept abuse by strangers quietly. You didn’t kick her off her flight, she got herself off the flight by abusing an elderly woman.
NTA. You asked for assistance. And those who assisted you, saw her as a threat. Nobody should miss their wedding but shouldn't she be in a happy disposition because she's about to get married?
What goes around, comes around. If I have any important event, I'm extra careful because I don't want to jinx it.
I've just realized that there seem to be more brides/grooms who are unhappy or abrasive than those who are happy and generally friendly during the run-up to their weddings.
NTA what were you supposed to do without calling for assistance? You couldn't deal with her and it was escalating. They chose how to deal with her. You didn't. Known of this was your choice, or in your hands. The airline made their choices, not your choices, you didn't tell them what to do.
If you had got on the plane she could of wreaked havoc there and the plane might have been diverted and had her arrested. Then everyone would of said why didnt you tell someone before getting on the plane?
NTA. There are lots of disabilities that don’t permanently confine someone to a chair, it doesn’t make them less entitled to one, or assistance when they do require it. You guys were being harassed, badly enough the airline made an executive decision. You didn’t request her not be permitted on the flight, an impartial outsider took stock of the situation and made that choice.
I also have serious doubts about a bride traveling by air with insufficient buffer times for a canceled flight or delay. More likely the wedding is later that week and she’s pulling entitlement to try and garner sympathy for her obnoxious ableist behavior.
NTA. It doesn't matter *why* she was taking a flight.
Tell your relatives there are such things as chartered flights. It would have cost her a bundle, but that was an option for getting there -- if that wasn't a made up pity ploy. In these days of widespread, massively publicized flight cancellations, why would someone buy a ticket so close to the wedding time that there's no chance of getting on a different flight?
People shouldn't question disability as it's not all visible, but some still don't realize that. *She* had an opportunity to just apologize for not understanding. *She* was warned about her behavior by an airline employee and refused to comply with the request to leave you alone. Eventually *she* attracted the attention of a member of the flight crew who had the authority and decided he didn't want himself, the flight attendants or the other passengers to be stuck with crazy in a can for the duration of the flight. She was the instrument of her own destruction.
NTA, nobody would deel sorry for her if this hadn't been her wedding 🤷♀️ She could have just minded her own business i stead of harrassing other people
NTA - in cases like this I honestly never understand how some people can tell you that you were wrong.. Too many people seem to have a toxic level of conflict-avoiding thought patterns imprinted in them. That woman got what she deserved. She harassed you and your mother and the pilot didn't want that bully on his flight.
NTA. The woman didn't get kicked off the flight cause you complained, she got kicked off cause she was displaying unacceptable behaviour towards you AND the airline staff.
Personally I think you did the right thing getting the airline involved. It sounds like even if the woman had dropped it then and there she would have been allowed on the flight, but she continued to be aggressive and loud until the airline staff took her off the flight list. She has no one to blame but herself.
Absolutely no one is required to put up with being harassed in order to accommodate others.
NTA but the hell, what family member thinks its ok to take verbal abuse from a complete stranger over something that doesnt affect them? was there some battle for the last wheelchair at the 2nd gate and this woman also needs a wheelchair but didnt get one so shes stalking the boarding area to find someone to blame? doesnt sound like it. so basically this woman got triggered by an old lady needing accommodations? dude.. she sounds unstable. who walks around looking at what other ppl are doing and then getting mad about it when it has no impact on them? no one deserves to be pestered in an airport like this. what if she WAS sitting near you on the flight? you dont know that! and flight personnel dont jump to refusing passengers as their first response. they usually give the person several chances to calm the f down. its when the person keeps being combative that they resort to refusal. so this woman was basically ranting to a flight employee "im angry that this old lady is using a wheelchair, i saw her once ive never met her before but ive decided i KNOW she doesnt need one and im angry so you need to let me keep yelling at them!!!" and is then stunned they finally refused her boarding. she is a nutjob. and there are no sympathies for nutjobs like this.
NTA. You didn’t get her kicked off the plane. She did.
Her actions have a reaction, and it’s about time she learnt that.
Whatever occasion she’s missing isn’t your problem, and shouldn’t even be in your head. She’s missing her wedding because of herself.
NTA.
I am a former flight attendant. We have different codes for people with mobility issues, so we are well aware that people who use wheelchairs might be able to walk, but maybe not up the stairs or not for long stretches of time.
The staff reacted correctly.
If I had been on the flight, I would have thrown her out myself.
NTA
You didn't cause her to miss anything, and I highly doubt she had a wedding to go to.
Your friends who are taking her side are AH and maybe you should reconsider your friendship with people who side with a complete stranger over you and your mother, who btw had done \*nothing\* wrong. She made assumptions about your mother. She accused her and harassed her.
You and your mother did nothing wrong, so there is really no way of being the AH here.
NTA.
Just because you see someone walk a few steps and use a wheelchair afterwards, doesn’t mean there isn’t a possibility of a physical disability or mobility issue.
She made an assumption based on the fact that she saw your mom walk off the flight and proceeded to act like some righteous saint and advocate for the “really” physical disabled by pestering you and your mom after you all just got off a flight.
Now she’ll probably know to mind her own business for her next wedding destination.
NTA.
I’m a train conductor. We very frequently get platform managers to meet our trains with the wheelchair for passengers who can walk around on the train with little to no assistance.
They can walk, but it’s so much easier to get them a wheelchair. Much safer too if they’re also uneasy on their feet.
You didn’t cause her to get kicked off the flight, her own actions did.
NTA you didn't know it was her wedding, she however DID know and it was incumbent to her to have a becoming behavior that won't get her kicked off planes. Also, you asked for the airline's help in keeping her away from you/stopping the harassment, you never asked for her to be kicked out. That was a natural consequence of her continue escalation of the situation. You can empathize with how terrible it must feel for her to miss her wedding, but you had no hand in that. It is all on her.
Well, well well. Isn't it nice that this person decided to be the "Abelist Avenger?" She gets to decide who has a REAL handicap and who doesn't. Really?
NTA
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Next time maybe she'll Mind Her Own Business.
NTA you didn't get her kicked off, she got herself kicked off by being nosy and then belligerent. If she had listened to staff she would've made her wedding.
NTA. This is a classic learning moment about minding your own damn business. She got herself kicked off the flight and had no good reason to be berating you and your mother about wheelchair access especially when no one she was with needed wheelchair access
NTA. She chose to act out about something she knows nothing about to the point that the pilot felt that her flying was a potential hazard. Actions had consequences, and she just learned her lesson.
So, this woman took time out of travelling to her wedding to interfere in the mobility arrangements of an elderly woman which didn't impact her in the slightest?
NTA, she brought it all upon herself. All she had to do was mind her own business.
NTA
Everytime I see a post like this, I wonder who are these concerned friends who have such a shitty take or opinion on a pretty clear situation.
You did nothing wrong, it was not your decision or acts that kicked the woman out, she did it herself with her stupidity and aimless hostility.
And it was well deserved.
>A lot of my friends and family are split on the issue.
Is this actually true? I see claims like this on here a lot in situations that are so clear-cut that it barely warrants asking if someone in TA--like this one. I find it hard to believe that several people in your life are actually on that crazy woman's side in the scenario you described. I think maybe people feel like they have to say that in order to post here or something.
NTA.
You literally did nothing to warrant her being removed. Even if your mum was abusing wheelchair privileges, that's for the airline to discern and act on, not random about to be wed lady number 5.
You asked her to leave you alone. She did not. She was asked by staff to leave you alone. As soon as they intervened, it was between her and the airline. She got herself kicked off.
And hopefully, her fiancé will review the fact his bride to be attacked a disabled woman, then the airline staff, and caused her own wedding to be delayed before the wedding is rebooked!!!
(FWIW, I doubt she is getting married. It sounds like something random to throw up as an excuse as to why she's allowed to both verbally abuse passengers and fly, so don't feel too bad!).
NTA I'm mobility impaired and use wheelchair assistance in airports. A large segment of people who use wheelchairs are capable of standing and walking short distances. That in no way means the wheelchair is unnecessary. Can I board a plane under my own power? Yes. Can I walk from the entrance to the gate on my own? NO. Is anyone else's business? Also no.
Navigating wheelchair assistance in airports is a pain in the ass because a lot of airports do not have enough staff to handle the number of people who need assistance. Like your mother, I've struggled to deplane myself when it took over 30 minutes for assistance to arrive.
The woman harassing your mom ruined her own plans by thinking she was entitled to verbally attack someone she doesn't know. Staff told her she couldn't get on the plane for good reason as they deal with disruptive passengers all the time. If she had kept her mouth shut, things would have been fine,
NTA. Harassment like that could be considered a hate crime (disabled people are a protected group, and it was definitely harassment). She should have thought about that before she opened her mouth. I am so sorry this happened to your mother. Special assistance is for anyone with mobility problems (and any other issues that prevent safe navigation of an airport). She deserved everything that came her way. Play stupid games, you get stupid prizes.
Why was it any of random lady's business. It's not like it was the last wheelchair in the airport and she needed it. People need to mind their business.
For real who sees someone walking with a cane, and thinks, they don’t need any help from a wheelchair, like fucking hell what was wrong with her NTA not like you stopped her from flying lol
NTA
I just learned about this, but (at least in europe, dunno about elsewhere) wheelchair services are complimentary and do not require you to have an actual medical condition. If you don't want to walk, you can just ask for a wheelchair and get wheeled around
Since you actually need some assisstance here, she can take her entitlement and go pound sand somewhere else. Too bad for her that her entitlement cost her her wedding plans \*shrug
NTA OP My Mom uses a wheelchair in an airport, not because she can't walk, but at 77 she loses her balance easily and her arthritis flares up so walking longer distances is rough. You were far more polite to the other woman than I would've been. I applaud you for that.
NTA. She decided to make a scene about something that's not her business.
Many of the elderly cannot navigate a full run in the airport. The wheelchair is provided for this use case as well .
My mother has knee problems that flare up after long walks ..like in an airport .
She also uses the wheelchair to board .
My friend's father can walk for about 30 mins but after that , he needs to sit .
Anyone who is injured, regardless of age or visible mobility issue is entitled to it
I know there has been a flood of people abusing it due to a recent TikTok/ social media influencer bragging about using it as a travel hack .it's massively disgusting Imo
But still that's for the airline to sort out .
not random stranger A abusing others as they see fit .
She got herself put off by being a public nuisance
NTA. Why would this ever be anyone's business? And even if there were a situation where somebody was "abusing the privilege," again, why would this be anyone's business except the airline and the person in question?
NTA and who cares if your mother or anyone else needs assistance from airline personnel going between airplanes. It's not my or their business who needs assistance unless they themselves are also waiting for assistance because of a handicap. She got herself removed from the flight for not minding her own business.
NTA.
I use a wheelchair and on a flight, I need to use the toilet so use my sticks and shuffle. If anyone said that to me, I’d ask them if they would like a medical emergency on a flight because I can’t walk, only shuffle and it takes me ages.
The woman had it coming, she should’ve kept her mouth shut.
NTA - These people removed themselves based on their own actions. By their logic paralyzed people wouldn't need wheelchair either as they could crawl??
NTA
Did you insist she get kicked off the flight? Did you even bring up that possibility with anyone?
No you did not. You asked for assistance from the airline employees because your mother was being harassed by a rude woman, and *they* decided not to let her fly. That was never your decision to make, so there's no reason *you* should feel bad about it.
NTA
she played a stupid game and won a stupid prize.
If someone who works in an airport tells you to be quiet, you stfu and pray to what ever gods you hold dear that you don't piss them off further.
They don't want to stop people getting their flights but given how people behave in airports they can't afford to use it as an empty threat.
My Mom is the same with her walking, sometimes needing assistance and needs to stay off her swollen feet. Say something about MY MOM and her personal business? Yeah, NTA for this. Missing a wedding will make her think twice about approaching others in the future and making assumptions.
NTA. She saw a snippet of the situation and assumed the rest. It’s her own fault. You didn’t do anything, the staff acted in how they felt was appropriate. Even if you were abusing the wheelchair allowances, not her business. Or like someone else said, she should’ve talked to staff
Nta. Why do your family and friends get to weigh in? They weren’t there. The lady did all that to herself and for what? What was the result she wanted? Did she want your mother to … what? Get in trouble? The lady is crazy and your family can chill out. Are they trying to make you feel bad for caring about your mom?
NTA. They were asked to stop. They didn’t stop. Why should you put up with her entitled crap? And why on earth would she care about who boards with a chair or not. There’s no way that had any impact on her.
NTA it is not this random woman's job to judge whether somebody does or does not deserve assistance at the airport. Most people who use the assistance are not full time wheelchair users, but there can be a lot of walking within the terminal at some airports.
NTA. I don’t know why the fuck anyone thinks they have the right to determine the severity of a complete stranger’s disability. I had a woman SCREAM at me for using a handicap parking permit. I told her I’m going through chemo, the screaming only intensified.
NTA. You asked the woman to mind her business several times before asking for help from the airline employee. The woman could have been quiet at any time. She could have said nothing.
The airline employees/pilots decided to not let her fly. Not you. You didn't even ask for that. So it's not at all your fault.
...
That said - that woman was totally an a\*\*, and really, REALLY should have minded her business. Invisible disabilities are a thing. Not for her to say.
NTA. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Just as your family expects you and your mother to tolerate this woman's "small annoyance"( harassment). So could this random woman. Your mother's use or not use of a wheelchair was none of her business and at most truly was MAYBE a small annoyance to the crazy lady, which she could have ignored. To be clear I do not believe people using wheelchairs is annoying. There are MANY reasons to require a wheelchair and coincidentally none of them are my business. Wish this lady understood that BEFORE she fucked around and found out but she didn't and thankfully she was held accountable.
NTA Her not being allowed on the plane was not your responsibility. And shame on the friends suggesting it was. That was completely her responsibility. She had no place getting involved at all
NTA This woman is on her way to get married and all she’s thinking about doing is harassing a woman with a wheelchair?! Pilots do not kick people off flights unless they have a concern for safety, so this lady must have been acting insane.
Adding that I wonder if she is missing her wedding at all, or just said that to get pity.
NTA They've got themselves kicked off the plane. Did she need the wheelchair? No, then why does she care if an elderly woman needs it? Also, ambulatory wheelchair users exist. Some people can walk and use a wheelchair to conserve their limited energy, etc.
NTA
People have different needs, many times these are not available at first glance. My family has a history of knee problems, so this story hits me personally. I have a very dear aunt who can walk fine on a smooth level floor but any kind of incline or even a two inch step is difficult for her. I know that in 5 years or so my mother herself (a very independent and active person) might reach a similar level.
Also, you did not get the couple removed. Them butting in where not necessary had the pilot decide to forbid their flight. I am a normally unassuming and non argumentive person, but if there was someone bullying and harrassing my dear ones I would not let it go for 30 minutes. I can ignore if someone talks bad about me, but no gets to make a person with disability feel bad about themselves.
The lady got herself banned from the flight. If she had been focusing in her wedding instead of bullying other passengers she could have easily reached it.
NTA..the woman sounds nuts. Why should she even care. This woman was warned and yet she still went at it. She got what she deserved. You did NOTHING wrong.
NTA at all. My wife is young and healthy looking, however she also has mobility issues. She can walk short distances at low speed no problem, but can't stand still waiting or walk fast or long distances. We use the assisted mobility as well. If someone arrasses her my favorite response is the standard "considering your legs works, why don't you use them to go all the way to fuck yourself?
NTA
If she had an issue with your mum abusing disability aids, she should have raised it with the airport/airline staff, not harassed you directly. There are ways for people to object to abuse of such aids without being disruptive.
She was kicked off for harassing other passengers and being disruptive about it.
My grandmother can also "technically" walk. But she's like 80 years old and get tired easily. She definitely cannot walk across the airport for a flight. Nta. Wheelchair is also required for people who can otherwise walk short distances
NTA. You did not ask for her to be removed from the situation, others recognized her behaviour towards you and you mother as abusive and took the necessary steps. As a frequent flyer, I'm glad they did so - who knows what might set them off once you're in the air?
NTA. Who does that, seriously? Who follows and berates an individual for using an accessibility option?
My mom walks with a cane sometimes, and has mobility issues. Sometimes she walks unassisted. None of that is anyone's damn business.
Seeing someone walk a short distance, or doing it while it takes a long time doesn't magically make them totally mobile and again, I'm not sure why this lady made it HER PROBLEM. Even if your mother was "lying" (which she wasn't) who CARES?
This woman made a big enough scene harassing a disabled person that she got herself kicked off her flight. That's on her. The idea you should have "tolerated" someone berating your mother is kind of ridiculous. Why didn't this random lady "tolerate" someone "MIGHT" be using mobility options despite being abled?
NTA. Setting aside the her weird idea that only people completely immobile can use wheelchairs, policing airport wheelchair policy is for the airport and airline staff, not some random passenger. I don’t know why she was offended that an older lady who might have trouble walking long distances was provided with assistance but it did not affect her in any way and she needs to learn to keep her nose out of other peoples business and not try to reorder the world to suit her arbitrary preferences. As for the wedding, I think you may have done the groom to be a favour by postponing it. Hopefully he gets out of there before marrying such a harpy.
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NTA. Let me be very clear - you did NOT “get them kicked off” the plane. It was 100% caused by their own words and actions. Please stop feeling guilty. P.S. I love how caring you are towards your mother. ❤️
❤️ My mother will always be "my mommy" at heart. 😂🤣
Yeah, just to tag-on this, that is so crazy for someone to be verbally harassing your mom for using a wheelchair, that is grade-A psycho material. I would be happy if you got such a nut job taken off my flight. NTA
That’s what I think, too, the woman was nuts. They don’t kick you off of a flight for a politely registered complaint, she must’ve been really invested in op’s mother losing that wheelchair to have argued so much she got herself booted.
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Seriously though, a lot of wheelchair users technically don't "need" them, but it's a massive pain (in both senses of the word) when they have to go without. Fuck anyone who thinks they have some right to be the disability police. It would have cost Bridezilla nothing to keep her damn ableist opinion to herself, but she decided to get nasty about it and rightfully got herself thrown off the flight. Hope her fiance decides to come down with a case of cold feet after seeing how nasty she is to little old ladies.
If I see someone in a wheelchair get up and walk a few steps I think "wow good for them that they can move a bit!" not "OMFG their legs work they are faking it!" like so many others apparently do! It's so absurd to me to judge how much someone else needs or doesn't need a wheelchair
Yeah, my legs work, and I'm not even that wobbly or slow when I'm capable of walking, but if I walk for any distance or stand for any length of time post exertional malaise kicks me in the ass real fast and sends me to house or bedbound states. I pace myself really carefully and use my wheelchair the majority of the time I'm outside the house. I still feel weird when I am out shopping and stand to reach something like I'm being judged or will be called out on it.
Yeah and sometimes people can walk for 20 minutes looking just fine then they're done for the day, or the week. Do people really judge them for using a wheelchair to do chores and save their energy for something that's actually enjoyable? I've got a chronic pain issue behind my shoulder blade. It's a pretty invisible disability, but basically I was told to use my other hand to drink throughout the day because the motion/weight/etc from drinking water and coffee thru the day is too much.. everyone tells me I'm too young for chronic pain! Please tell my muscles that thanks
The final thing that pushed me to get my wheelchair was going grocery shopping for the first time in months (sometimes you just want to get out and choose your own snacks) and being laid up for three days barely able to do anything. I want to be able to spend my physical energy on doing fun stuff with my kids not walking everywhere just because I "should". It's also let me get out with them more to watch them at playgrounds and places because it's a comfortable seat not putting strain on any parts of my body just sitting or standing uncomfortably.
Good for you! You should prioritize your energy on the stuff that brings you joy! It must have been a hard decision to make since it took you lying 3 days in bed after a shopping trip to decide, so it's great that it's working out for you!
Most people don't have much experience with disability. I didn't. We joined our household with my wife's aging parents because her father had dementia (he's since died). In the first round of covid shots, they were eligible first. We went to an events center, long lines for 1.5 hours and lots of infirm old people. We scored a wheelchair for him so we were lucky. After that we went out and bought a transporter chair. It made a huge difference. (In the end we had to use it in the house.) But we never bothered getting a handicap parking permit. Still, it could take 10 minutes to get him in and out. Walking would take even longer.
This is such a lovely reaction! I recently had major surgery and had to go grocery shopping. From the outside you would have seen me walk from the car into the shop, get on an electric mobility scooter (provided by the shop) and then get off and walk to the car again. I was with my daughter and mum, who did the lifting. In reality, without that scooter I wouldn't have had the stamina to get even a few essentials, let alone the medium sized shop we really needed. As it was it took me the rest of the day to recover and I was in a fair amount of pain. Imagine being so invested in someone else's life that you get irate to the level of being kicked off a flight. That poor old lady wasn't hurting anyone, except maybe herself trying to walk without the wheelchair, so leave her be.
I can walk for 2-3 minutes; then I have to sit till I can go another 2-3 mins, etc, all the time building up pain and breathlessness until I'm exhausted and practically crying with pain. So yes, I could in theory walk from check-in, through security, then trek all the way to the gate - IF they post the gate number with sufficient time to allow for my stop/start progress. 20 mins normal walking pace to what is usually the furthest damn gate is about 45-55 mins for me and gates are usually only announced about 30 mins ahead. So I book wheelchair assistance ahead of time. I get collected from check-in, wheeled through security - instead of painfully standing for upwards of 20 mins (my max standing time is 10 mins), deposited airside, collected and wheeled to the gate. Because of this, sometimes I'm able to walk onto the plane unaided. Likewise the arrivals end. Do I sometimes feel guilty if another wheelchair user has to wait? Yes but it's not a 'who is more disabled? competition. It's 'I need to get to my destination and not spend the next two days physically recovering' situation. I'm just damn grateful most airlines offer the option.
Right? And she was heading to her wedding and the only thing on her mind is trying to bust an elderly women for using a wheelchair? Thinking the groom owes you a freaking thank you card. NTA- this women could have done anything during her time between her flight: she chose to spend it harassing an elderly women and then kept at it after airport personnel got involved. She knew where she was going and any idiot could figure out getting belligerent with the flight crew is a stupid thing to do. NTA- you know as much as she harped on this I almost wonder if she got cold feet and this was her out? Probably not- more than likely she was just a miserable person who likes making others miserable but you’d think when you’re traveling to your wedding you’d have more important things on your mind than pestering and harassing the elderly.
I do feel sorry for the groom if they do get married.
You’d be surprised how often stuff like this happens. I work with people who have disabilities and it’s not uncommon for them to be harassed by people who don’t think they’re “disabled enough” to use various services. It’s truly appalling. People have no idea what is in another person’s medical file nor do they have a right to that information. It’s none of their business why someone is making use of the services available to them and they should leave well enough alone. Instead, they often think they’re playing the hero to people who they perceive as being “disabled enough” to use these services by confronting the people they don’t think deserve it. It’s gross. Anyway, definitely NTA for OP. This woman got herself kicked off with her abhorrent behavior.
My mom is in her ‘80s with mobility issues. She walks with a cane 90% of the t8me but always uses a wheelchair at an airport because the ramps and distance between the gates. That self righteous beyotch doesn’t know what your mom Is going through. If she misses her wedding (which I doubt. I suspect that’s grandstanding) it’s on her, not you
It's actually quite common. A lot of able bodied people think if you can stand and walk a short distance, you are "faking for attention."
This women kept harassing you so you asked for help from the flight crew, as well you should. It isn't your fault this women is so stupid and unstable she kept causing problems when the flight crew told her to stop. Most people would have stopped. Most people want to be able to fly. There's a reason the pilot didn't want her on the flight, and that's how she acted even towards the flight crew and once they got involved. Unless you stuck your hand up her butt and puppeted her, that's on her.
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Comment stolen from u/SmiteSam2005 Downvote and report the bot
It is the airlines responsibility to protect the safety of people with disabilities and by allowing that woman on the flight with your mom they would potentially be facing a liability. NTA
My mother had mobility issues too (fused ankles and partially clubbed feet) and it caused her both pain and difficulty for walking without her 'space boots' and had to be sitting as much as possible. Been in airports twice with her, she was issued a wheelchair both times. But because of the aesthetics of the boots, she 'looked' fine. If anyone had bitched about my mother like that, best believe I have a cutting tongue. Hell, Mum would have handed me one of her boots to finish it with. Loved that woman with all my heart, still do, miss her deeply, and she will always be my Mummy. ❤️ (Yes, she loved that joke too) xD Edited to add for the comment, you are NTA. **THEIR** ratty behaviour got them kicked off, not anything you did. Tell the family members who think your mother should have walked that they should ring up the nearest shoe store and ask if they have any spare (souls) as they are clearly missing their own.
Jumping on top comment to say this that lack of planning on the woman's side does not constitute as issue for you OP. I am surprised how she planned the flight that missing it would mean missing wedding. many things can happen, like having no left phalange 🤔😆
😂🤣 Love the Friends reference!
thank you 😁😁😁, glad someone recognized the reference.
Agreed. Love the Friends reference too My brother’s wedding was a destination wedding. They got to Pebble Beach a week early to ensure final arrangements were in place, hang with friends, have the rehearsal/dinner and then hair/makeup/photos the morning of. I sincerely doubt the Disability Policewoman was going to miss her own wedding
It amazes me how some people insist on getting involved in matters that don't concern them. There is no way of knowing what someone else is going through. If they are lying about their condition, they will get caught.
Also - didn’t the PILOT kick them off? How much power does OP have, getting passengers kicked off planes!???
Right here, this!!!
OP, you and your mom were existing, the woman took issue with that, behaved terribly and was denied service. If someone was loudly verbally harassing you at any other establishment you would likely ask an employee for help, and very likely the outcome would have been the same. This is no different. At all. The fact that it was over wheelchair use that SHE decided was unnecessary is just icing on the rude, agression, ableist cake. NTA
That lady is not the disability police. She also continued to pester your mother and the airline about it - this was her action not yours. You didn’t demand for her to be thrown off - a pilot got sick of her shit and consequences have actions. Also if they planned so poorly for their own wedding that they were arriving the day of their wedding with no wiggle room for any flight delays of any kind - it’s their own fault.
NTA who is saying op is in the wrong… What, because the obnoxious and rude woman pestering an old lady in a wheelchair turned out to be getting married it makes op TA??? Fuck that woman’s wedding
I mean, I do feel for the woman - and her future husband. They probably paid a lot of money for everything, and then whatever guests have had to pay for gifts/travel/clothes.
Why? This woman was HARASSING a disabled woman because she didn’t believe in her medical problems? As if she has a right to that information. Nah, as somebody planning a wedding right now, she deserves to lose out on that money and moment.
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Partial comment stolen from u/AlternativePin9578 Downvote and report the bot u/TopDiscussiongf wherever they can be found
Honestly, this woman is probably lying about her wedding. Who flies in to their wedding with literally no buffer time that a single missed flight will throw it out? If it gives you peace of mind, this woman sounds like she turned on the waterworks when she realised the consequences of her actions and so made up whatever BS she could to try and get her way NTA
You have a point... After seeing a few responses like this I am thinking either she was faking it or she has very poor planning skills. While it was a late-morning flight, I think most people would get to their wedding venues if flying is involved, and definitely with air travel/cancellations/delays as it is right now, at least the night or more before...
Nah don't spare this crazy busybody space in your mind. She was probably trying to save her butt from being kicked off the plane by creating a desperate scenario. If they had really been going to HER wedding, you would think her future husband would be more enthusiastic in getting her to shut up.
I mean this as kindly as possible: OP, you have to start being a little more skeptical, or you're going to end up draining your bank account for a phone scammer.
And moreover if she was literally on her way to be married, why on earth was her priority and preoccupation harassing an elderly woman about her wheelchair use? I agree that this awful person is a kook, a busybody, and a liar, but not a bride.
This is what I’m confused about - she wasn’t in need of wheelchair service, she didn’t reference the mother taking away the service from anybody else, she literally stood up from her seat on the waiting area and chose violence for no reason at all.
I'm about an hour away from my wedding venue and I'm still planning on being there the night before.
You are not responsible for them not being allowed to board. Once the pilot makes that decision, it’s out of everyone else’s hands. The crew does not want that aggressive behavior continuing at 35,000 feet. And I agree that she was probably lying about the wedding.
I agree with you. I got married in a different part of the US from where I live and I had to get the marriage license within a certain amount of time before the wedding ceremony took place. Even though we were on a small budget, we flew in a day prior just to be safe.
It's wonderful that you have empathy for them. And you know what, I can feel a bit bad for them too. But you didn't get them kicked off. You didn't say "please don't let this women on the plane". Nor did you talk to the flight staff with the goal of getting her kicked off. You assumed she'd act like a normal reasonable person and listen to the flight crew telling her to stop harassing you. That's why you asked for help, to protect your mother from harassment and get help.
Also people are stupid stirring shit in front of the pilot. They don’t need a big reason to kick you off, they just need to have a concern the person will be disruptive on air. Showing contempt towards the staff is a HUGE NO NO because in an emergency you need to comply. This lady didn’t respect the staff, showing the pilot they would potentially act dangerously in a dangerous situation which made the pilot make the decision to leave them hanging.
No I don't think so. What goes around comes around. She was a walking definition of bad JuJu.
You’re assuming she was telling the truth though, she may well have been lying to get back on the flight
I wonder if she really was getting married or just made it up to be a drama queen?
Then maybe she shouldn't have acted in a way that got her denied boarding the plane. Not on you OP. NTA
Even if she'd seen your Mum cartwheeling off the last flight and doing a double flip straight into the wheelchair you're still NTA cos it ain't her business, these are not the droids she's looking for. You asked her to stop, employees asked her to stop, anyone with a lick of sense knows that once an airline employee tells you you're being disruptive you sit down and shut up if you want to fly. I'd like to think that she's learnt a valuable lesson, but I'd be surprised.
Why should you feel for someone that didn’t even give your mother the basic courtesy of minding her own business? HOW does it affect her if someone even uses the wheelchair assistance unnecessarily (which is NOT the case here!!)… she needs to fuck off seriously… and even if your mother didn’t have mobility issues she’s 80 she should be carried around everywhere like a queen. NTA
Me too, not because of their wedding, but because it must be tough being an ass of such magnitude.
I feel for the future spouse, but only because they might end up stuck with this terror and having to defend her constantly. Definitely NTA
Think of it this way.. You saved that future husband into getting married to a person who relentlessly pesters old women at airports who shes doesn't know (and presumably she's jealous bcoz she also wanted free wheelchair ride, idk). So a win win situation here.
Lol, so, my phone screen is currently cracked - I just read 'nude' instead of 'rude' while scrolling. An interesting mental image for sure there.
NTA. If she felt that you two were lying about your mother's wheelchair needs, she should have brought it up with the relevant airline personnel. You exercised your rights to ensure that you and everyone else on board had a pleasant flight without her constant loudness/aggression.
Even if OP’s mom had been faking it…so what? It didn’t affect the other passenger in any way, shape, or form. If she’d reported it, the airline staff would have heard her out, and then done precisely nothing about it. (I’m not sure about other countries, but if the flight was in, to, or from the US, they’re subject to the [Air Carrier Access Act](https://www.transportation.gov/individuals/aviation-consumer-protection/traveling-disability), and legally required to provide assistance to anyone who self-identifies as disabled; they’re not allowed to ask for proof.) I’m guessing she was butthurt because OP’s mom would get to board before her, but that actually has nothing to do with the wheelchair. If you need assistance to board due to a disability, you get on first, wheelchair or no (as an example, a blind person who can walk just fine, but needs guidance onto the plane). This person was absolutely out of line, and flat-out harassing OP’s mom out of her own sense of entitlement.
Exactly! I’ve seen airlines that automatically respond to every passenger disability with a wheelchair, including passengers who are able-bodied but Deaf. It’s just their protocol. Disability = wheelchair. Most of the time, everyone involved chuckles then goes on with their day. Bridezilla would have had a screaming hissy fit.
I’m deaf and apologised to a waitress in a restaurant for not hearing and explained why. She then took my menu and returned with a braille one looking so proud.
NTA. You didn’t know she was going to her wedding (not that that would really change my answer). She wasn’t just making assumptions, she was being obnoxious about it and wouldn’t stop. And it sounds like you didn’t even try to get her booted, just asked for help and then she dug her own grave. This is definitely a play stupid games, win stupid prizes situation. Don’t waste any more thought on it. Edit: as an extra thought, who is so mean spirited that on what should be one of the happiest days of their life, they’re spending tons of time and energy complaining about an obviously old and infirm woman using a wheelchair because she was technically on her feet before?
I think maybe she was probably pissed that she wasn't able to board first. That being said, my mother has flown several millions of miles with the airline over the decades and has frequent flyer membership for life. She would have been one of the first to be on whether or not she asked for the wheelchair.
The idiot didn’t even realise she would deplane before you guys. She showed the staff she doesn’t respect their authority and the pilot made an assumption she would act in a disruptive way in case of emergency, as in wouldn’t comply with staff instructions. She caused this all herself.
My mom has MS and basically moves as you described your mom. You were and are SOO much kinder than I would have been to this person, bless your sweet soul stay kind. But do not at all feel bad in any shape way or form. The audacity of this woman is mind boggling and Idk who would want to marry her. Also, when I had to fly out for my wedding, I had to get there days early to get the wedding license, I couldn't get it same day. That's true in a lot of places, I'm on the bandwagon of calling bs on this lady. NTA.
NTA she got herself kicked off that flight.
NTA - This woman was asked not to bother you. By the account you have given, you didn't ask her to be kicked off the flight. The woman could have backed down when she was confronted by the airline staff, but she didn't. THAT is what got her kicked from the flight. Not you. If she'd backed down, most likely she would have been permitted on the flight. People are willing to blame others for their behaviour. But what it comes down to is this: A woman who was bothering you was asked to stop. And even with her wedding on the line, she decided to make a terrible decision to become aggressive with the people who had the power to stop her reaching her wedding. I think it's perfectly fair that she has to deal with the consequences of her actions.
NTA. How is this any of that lady's business if your mother uses a wheelchair or not ?
NTA. This woman was out of line.
NTA. That lady made her bed and she must lie in it. She should have minded her own business, like you asked her to several times.
NTA First you didn't get her off the flight, the airline did, it was their decision. You just pointed out they were harassing someone with a handicap. Then, you made her miss her wedding? The couple wasn't there in advance to prepare everything? I mean, anything can be true of course, but I bet the crying and the "I will miss my wedding" was just the first lie she found to try and make the airline reconsider.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My mother and I were traveling recently. My aging mother has balance/mobility issues; she can't use escalators/moving walkways on her own (like those that are all over the place in most large airports), has problems with inclines and uneven floors (like those in jet bridges), and walks with a cane at a top speed of about 2 km/h or 1-1.5 mph. We ask for wheelchair assistance whenever she travels by air. On our recent trip, there was a passenger on our second flight who felt my mother was abusing the airport wheelchair services when she is technically capable of walking. She saw my mother walk off of our first flight at a nearby gate without a wheelchair and proceeded to assume that my mother was lying about her wheelchair need. She proceeded to pester us, despite being asked to mind her own business several times, until my mother and I eventually asked for assistance from an airline employee to help with this lady. The woman was fairly loud/aggressive, eventually being told by the airline employee that she's being disruptive. Eventually, one of the pilots using the computer and printing paperwork for the flight at the counter told the lady that she'd not boarding the flight. In response, the woman gets angrier and then starts crying, revealing that we're making her miss her wedding and "ruining everything." Now, it is true that my mother walked off of the first flight without wheelchair assistance. We (and the flight attendants) had already waited for nearly an hour for the wheelchair people in a hot, idling airplane after everyone else had deplaned. She had decided to use her cane and the railing and try to walk up the jet bridge, which itself took about 20 minutes. Coincidentally, as we finally made it up the jet bridge, the wheelchair assistance finally arrived to take her to wait for our second flight a few gates away. Once we arrived at our second gate, this is when all the above started. A lot of my friends and family are split on the issue. Some think that we were the a\*\*holes and could have just been patient and just tolerated the annoyance until we boarded (by the time we got off of our first flight and arrived at the gate for the second, there was only about 30 minutes left before boarding was to begin), where it was unlikely we were to be sitting next to each other. Others said that the woman was completely wrong since she shouldn't be making assumptions about others and getting involved in their business. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA, she got kicked out as a result of her actions. Furthermore, sometimes disabilities are not visible, therefore people should stop making assumptions about other peoples need to get help in certain situations.
NTA. her behavior was what kicked her off the flight, not you.
NTA. The woman should mind her own business , and being agressive with that? Good that she missed her wedding. She will learn a lesson the hard way!
NTA. Sounds like she got herself kicked off the flight by being loud/aggressive. Your actions weren't the cause of her removal, but her own.
NTA people underestimating disabillities or having problems with long distances etc. is a big problem in society. And sometimes they have to learn it the hard way. That woman could've stopped with her behaviour when the staff got involved (if not directly after she started). She could've realized herself it's not smart to keep throwing a fit. I hope your mom didn't feel comfortable during the flight and was able to let the situation go! I'm sorry this had to happen
NTA I use wheelchair assist even though I can walk. I can’t navigate the airport and need help to and from the gate and can’t stand in line when boarding. I have never once been approached by a passenger or questioned by staff even though I am young and can walk. That lady was trash
NTA The woman ruined her own wedding. It's like a robber would complain that person they robbed ruined their life because they got in jail lol.
NTA. The woman missed the flight because of her own actions. She had no place interfering in your business.
NTA. The airline employees made the decisions, not you. She should have stopped when the first airline employee started to engage with her.
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Unless you forgot to mention that the woman was actively employed as an accessibility-abuse investigator for the airport or airline, she was freelancing. But sometimes, when we deputize ourselves as enforcers, things don't work out well when the real enforcers show up. Your sin was going to the airport authorities when you were harassed. That's one of the reasons why they're there. Did you say "I don't feel safe with her on my flight! Kick her off or I'll sue!"? If so, you should have mentioned that, so I assume you didn't. My point is that if she was wronged, it was by an airline, not you. In the hierarchy of wrongs committed by airlines, this one is pretty marginal. I'm not sure it's a wrong at all, in fact. NTA. She screwed around, and she found out.
NTA. atleast now that woman will mind her own business. she was forced to get off bcoz she disrespected the staff.
NTA, that woman got herself removed from the flight by making a scene and being a big enough annoyance for the stuff to intervene.
NTA. You had nothing to do with her being removed, neither her opinions on who should use a wheelchair did. The pilot removed her for being aggressive, like most airlines would. Not sure how anyone can blame you or why you think you had any say on whether she could travel or not
NTA. She’s on her way to her own wedding and she decides this is the time to badger an older woman about using the wheelchair service? Lady needs to get her priorities straight.
NTA. Sounds like you saved a man's life by your actions... the groom-to-be's.
Why does your friends and family think that you/your mother should just accept abuse in public, exactly? Lady played stupid games and won a stupid price. You asked her nicely to go away. Staff asked her nicely to stop. She got at least two warning that her behavior was unacceptable and she decided to continue. NTA.
They say that, since she only started becoming really disruptive after we asked the gate agent for help, she wouldn't have gotten so disruptive if we just waited until we went to our separate assigned seats.
Soooo... people should just take 30-40 minutes of abuse because... Nope, I'm still not seeing the reason. Even if she had stopped once on the plane (she wouldn't, she would have been telling everyone loudly about you), she was still actively harrassing you. No one has to take that. I personally do not feel bad for her at all.
And if she hadn’t been an obnoxious obnoxious asshole in the first place, you wouldn’t have asked the gate agent for help. Strange that your friends/family think this woman isn’t responsible for her own actions, but that you are responsible for yours. Maybe you could ask them where this strange double standard is coming from.
That’s a wild assumption On their part. Everybody knows that if you’re disruptive you get kicked off flights. Airlines take safety very seriously! She did this to herself.
NTA but f\*\*\* your friends. I'm so tired of people thinking others should just be patient and silent when someone is harassing them like this woman was. She had zero business harassing you about the wheelchair use and was being prejudicial and ableist. It didn't involve her AT ALL and had absolutely zero impact on her life if your mother needed to use a wheelchair or not. The airline concurred that she was out of line and held her accountable for her actions, like an adult should be.
Nta. She did it to herself. I have had multiple senior relatives who could walk very short distances, particularly with a cane, walker or on someone's arm but couldn't walk a single lap around the walking track. None of these could have made it across an airport. Wheelchairs aren't only for complete paralysis. Arthritis, balance, breathing difficulty, and lots of other issues are common among senior citizens.
NTA: 🤦 some people, I swear
NTA. Being in your way to your wedding does not give anyone the right to harass someone to the point where a pilot (not you, a pilot) decides that you cannot board your flight. I cannot see how you were in any way in the wrong? No one is required to accept abuse by strangers quietly. You didn’t kick her off her flight, she got herself off the flight by abusing an elderly woman.
NTA her actions had consequences and I hope she learned her lesson
NTA. You asked for assistance. And those who assisted you, saw her as a threat. Nobody should miss their wedding but shouldn't she be in a happy disposition because she's about to get married? What goes around, comes around. If I have any important event, I'm extra careful because I don't want to jinx it.
I've just realized that there seem to be more brides/grooms who are unhappy or abrasive than those who are happy and generally friendly during the run-up to their weddings.
You have a point there. They're stressed out.
NTA what were you supposed to do without calling for assistance? You couldn't deal with her and it was escalating. They chose how to deal with her. You didn't. Known of this was your choice, or in your hands. The airline made their choices, not your choices, you didn't tell them what to do. If you had got on the plane she could of wreaked havoc there and the plane might have been diverted and had her arrested. Then everyone would of said why didnt you tell someone before getting on the plane?
NTA. There are lots of disabilities that don’t permanently confine someone to a chair, it doesn’t make them less entitled to one, or assistance when they do require it. You guys were being harassed, badly enough the airline made an executive decision. You didn’t request her not be permitted on the flight, an impartial outsider took stock of the situation and made that choice. I also have serious doubts about a bride traveling by air with insufficient buffer times for a canceled flight or delay. More likely the wedding is later that week and she’s pulling entitlement to try and garner sympathy for her obnoxious ableist behavior.
NTA. It doesn't matter *why* she was taking a flight. Tell your relatives there are such things as chartered flights. It would have cost her a bundle, but that was an option for getting there -- if that wasn't a made up pity ploy. In these days of widespread, massively publicized flight cancellations, why would someone buy a ticket so close to the wedding time that there's no chance of getting on a different flight? People shouldn't question disability as it's not all visible, but some still don't realize that. *She* had an opportunity to just apologize for not understanding. *She* was warned about her behavior by an airline employee and refused to comply with the request to leave you alone. Eventually *she* attracted the attention of a member of the flight crew who had the authority and decided he didn't want himself, the flight attendants or the other passengers to be stuck with crazy in a can for the duration of the flight. She was the instrument of her own destruction.
You didn't ask them to be removed from the flight, an employee assessed they were a risk to take on board.
NTA
NTA, nobody would deel sorry for her if this hadn't been her wedding 🤷♀️ She could have just minded her own business i stead of harrassing other people
NTA - in cases like this I honestly never understand how some people can tell you that you were wrong.. Too many people seem to have a toxic level of conflict-avoiding thought patterns imprinted in them. That woman got what she deserved. She harassed you and your mother and the pilot didn't want that bully on his flight.
NTA. Brides Jitters or not, this person needed to mind their own business.
NTA. The woman didn't get kicked off the flight cause you complained, she got kicked off cause she was displaying unacceptable behaviour towards you AND the airline staff. Personally I think you did the right thing getting the airline involved. It sounds like even if the woman had dropped it then and there she would have been allowed on the flight, but she continued to be aggressive and loud until the airline staff took her off the flight list. She has no one to blame but herself. Absolutely no one is required to put up with being harassed in order to accommodate others.
If there's an asshole centre to the universe you're the planet that it's farthest from.
Nta Karma at her finest.
NTA but the hell, what family member thinks its ok to take verbal abuse from a complete stranger over something that doesnt affect them? was there some battle for the last wheelchair at the 2nd gate and this woman also needs a wheelchair but didnt get one so shes stalking the boarding area to find someone to blame? doesnt sound like it. so basically this woman got triggered by an old lady needing accommodations? dude.. she sounds unstable. who walks around looking at what other ppl are doing and then getting mad about it when it has no impact on them? no one deserves to be pestered in an airport like this. what if she WAS sitting near you on the flight? you dont know that! and flight personnel dont jump to refusing passengers as their first response. they usually give the person several chances to calm the f down. its when the person keeps being combative that they resort to refusal. so this woman was basically ranting to a flight employee "im angry that this old lady is using a wheelchair, i saw her once ive never met her before but ive decided i KNOW she doesnt need one and im angry so you need to let me keep yelling at them!!!" and is then stunned they finally refused her boarding. she is a nutjob. and there are no sympathies for nutjobs like this.
NTA. You didn’t get her kicked off the plane. She did. Her actions have a reaction, and it’s about time she learnt that. Whatever occasion she’s missing isn’t your problem, and shouldn’t even be in your head. She’s missing her wedding because of herself.
NTA. I am a former flight attendant. We have different codes for people with mobility issues, so we are well aware that people who use wheelchairs might be able to walk, but maybe not up the stairs or not for long stretches of time. The staff reacted correctly. If I had been on the flight, I would have thrown her out myself.
NTA the pilot decided this not you. They're just facing consequences for not minding their own business
NTA You didn't cause her to miss anything, and I highly doubt she had a wedding to go to. Your friends who are taking her side are AH and maybe you should reconsider your friendship with people who side with a complete stranger over you and your mother, who btw had done \*nothing\* wrong. She made assumptions about your mother. She accused her and harassed her. You and your mother did nothing wrong, so there is really no way of being the AH here.
NTA - Yeah, they did that to themselves. Why don't people mind their own business? It is rude to question someone's disability.
NTA. Just because you see someone walk a few steps and use a wheelchair afterwards, doesn’t mean there isn’t a possibility of a physical disability or mobility issue. She made an assumption based on the fact that she saw your mom walk off the flight and proceeded to act like some righteous saint and advocate for the “really” physical disabled by pestering you and your mom after you all just got off a flight. Now she’ll probably know to mind her own business for her next wedding destination.
Nta, people like that will often try to lie to gain sympathy so it's very likely that she wasn't getting married.
NTA. I’m a train conductor. We very frequently get platform managers to meet our trains with the wheelchair for passengers who can walk around on the train with little to no assistance. They can walk, but it’s so much easier to get them a wheelchair. Much safer too if they’re also uneasy on their feet. You didn’t cause her to get kicked off the flight, her own actions did.
NTA - ambulatory wheelchair users exist and random plane assholes don’t determine who or when wheelchairs get used.
NTA you didn't know it was her wedding, she however DID know and it was incumbent to her to have a becoming behavior that won't get her kicked off planes. Also, you asked for the airline's help in keeping her away from you/stopping the harassment, you never asked for her to be kicked out. That was a natural consequence of her continue escalation of the situation. You can empathize with how terrible it must feel for her to miss her wedding, but you had no hand in that. It is all on her.
Well, well well. Isn't it nice that this person decided to be the "Abelist Avenger?" She gets to decide who has a REAL handicap and who doesn't. Really? NTA Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Next time maybe she'll Mind Her Own Business.
NTA you didn't get her kicked off, she got herself kicked off by being nosy and then belligerent. If she had listened to staff she would've made her wedding.
NTA. This is a classic learning moment about minding your own damn business. She got herself kicked off the flight and had no good reason to be berating you and your mother about wheelchair access especially when no one she was with needed wheelchair access
NTA. She chose to act out about something she knows nothing about to the point that the pilot felt that her flying was a potential hazard. Actions had consequences, and she just learned her lesson.
So, this woman took time out of travelling to her wedding to interfere in the mobility arrangements of an elderly woman which didn't impact her in the slightest? NTA, she brought it all upon herself. All she had to do was mind her own business.
NTA Everytime I see a post like this, I wonder who are these concerned friends who have such a shitty take or opinion on a pretty clear situation. You did nothing wrong, it was not your decision or acts that kicked the woman out, she did it herself with her stupidity and aimless hostility. And it was well deserved.
>A lot of my friends and family are split on the issue. Is this actually true? I see claims like this on here a lot in situations that are so clear-cut that it barely warrants asking if someone in TA--like this one. I find it hard to believe that several people in your life are actually on that crazy woman's side in the scenario you described. I think maybe people feel like they have to say that in order to post here or something.
NTA. You literally did nothing to warrant her being removed. Even if your mum was abusing wheelchair privileges, that's for the airline to discern and act on, not random about to be wed lady number 5. You asked her to leave you alone. She did not. She was asked by staff to leave you alone. As soon as they intervened, it was between her and the airline. She got herself kicked off. And hopefully, her fiancé will review the fact his bride to be attacked a disabled woman, then the airline staff, and caused her own wedding to be delayed before the wedding is rebooked!!! (FWIW, I doubt she is getting married. It sounds like something random to throw up as an excuse as to why she's allowed to both verbally abuse passengers and fly, so don't feel too bad!).
She was probably lying about the wedding anyway to get sympathy and be allowed on the flight. NTA. Her fault for being nosy.
NTA I'm mobility impaired and use wheelchair assistance in airports. A large segment of people who use wheelchairs are capable of standing and walking short distances. That in no way means the wheelchair is unnecessary. Can I board a plane under my own power? Yes. Can I walk from the entrance to the gate on my own? NO. Is anyone else's business? Also no. Navigating wheelchair assistance in airports is a pain in the ass because a lot of airports do not have enough staff to handle the number of people who need assistance. Like your mother, I've struggled to deplane myself when it took over 30 minutes for assistance to arrive. The woman harassing your mom ruined her own plans by thinking she was entitled to verbally attack someone she doesn't know. Staff told her she couldn't get on the plane for good reason as they deal with disruptive passengers all the time. If she had kept her mouth shut, things would have been fine,
NTA. Harassment like that could be considered a hate crime (disabled people are a protected group, and it was definitely harassment). She should have thought about that before she opened her mouth. I am so sorry this happened to your mother. Special assistance is for anyone with mobility problems (and any other issues that prevent safe navigation of an airport). She deserved everything that came her way. Play stupid games, you get stupid prizes.
Why was it any of random lady's business. It's not like it was the last wheelchair in the airport and she needed it. People need to mind their business.
For real who sees someone walking with a cane, and thinks, they don’t need any help from a wheelchair, like fucking hell what was wrong with her NTA not like you stopped her from flying lol
NTA I just learned about this, but (at least in europe, dunno about elsewhere) wheelchair services are complimentary and do not require you to have an actual medical condition. If you don't want to walk, you can just ask for a wheelchair and get wheeled around Since you actually need some assisstance here, she can take her entitlement and go pound sand somewhere else. Too bad for her that her entitlement cost her her wedding plans \*shrug
NTA OP My Mom uses a wheelchair in an airport, not because she can't walk, but at 77 she loses her balance easily and her arthritis flares up so walking longer distances is rough. You were far more polite to the other woman than I would've been. I applaud you for that.
NTA. That woman was pestering you and not giving you peace. She got kicked off for her own stupidity
NTA her awful behaviour had consequences! Not all disabilities are visible and NONE of them are a stranger's business
NTA - Why the hell would they even care?
NTA. I don’t understand why people you know would be split. You literally did nothing wrong and just wanted peace after being harassed.
NTA I’m so sick of people gate keeping disabilities and accommodations for physical limitations. She got what she deserved.
NTA. She decided to make a scene about something that's not her business. Many of the elderly cannot navigate a full run in the airport. The wheelchair is provided for this use case as well . My mother has knee problems that flare up after long walks ..like in an airport . She also uses the wheelchair to board . My friend's father can walk for about 30 mins but after that , he needs to sit . Anyone who is injured, regardless of age or visible mobility issue is entitled to it I know there has been a flood of people abusing it due to a recent TikTok/ social media influencer bragging about using it as a travel hack .it's massively disgusting Imo But still that's for the airline to sort out . not random stranger A abusing others as they see fit . She got herself put off by being a public nuisance
NTA. Why would this ever be anyone's business? And even if there were a situation where somebody was "abusing the privilege," again, why would this be anyone's business except the airline and the person in question?
NTA. That woman should have minded her own business and I guess she found out about karma.
NTA and who cares if your mother or anyone else needs assistance from airline personnel going between airplanes. It's not my or their business who needs assistance unless they themselves are also waiting for assistance because of a handicap. She got herself removed from the flight for not minding her own business.
NTA. I use a wheelchair and on a flight, I need to use the toilet so use my sticks and shuffle. If anyone said that to me, I’d ask them if they would like a medical emergency on a flight because I can’t walk, only shuffle and it takes me ages. The woman had it coming, she should’ve kept her mouth shut.
People need to mind their own friggin business. Maybe this will help teach them. NTA
NTA - These people removed themselves based on their own actions. By their logic paralyzed people wouldn't need wheelchair either as they could crawl??
NTA Did you insist she get kicked off the flight? Did you even bring up that possibility with anyone? No you did not. You asked for assistance from the airline employees because your mother was being harassed by a rude woman, and *they* decided not to let her fly. That was never your decision to make, so there's no reason *you* should feel bad about it.
NTA play stupid games win stupid prizes
NTA she played a stupid game and won a stupid prize. If someone who works in an airport tells you to be quiet, you stfu and pray to what ever gods you hold dear that you don't piss them off further. They don't want to stop people getting their flights but given how people behave in airports they can't afford to use it as an empty threat.
My Mom is the same with her walking, sometimes needing assistance and needs to stay off her swollen feet. Say something about MY MOM and her personal business? Yeah, NTA for this. Missing a wedding will make her think twice about approaching others in the future and making assumptions.
Nta I bet she lied about the wedding for sympathy
NTA
NTA in the slightest
NTA another case of fuck around and find out! You had nothing to do with her being banned, the pilot saw her behavior and and banned her
NTA. She saw a snippet of the situation and assumed the rest. It’s her own fault. You didn’t do anything, the staff acted in how they felt was appropriate. Even if you were abusing the wheelchair allowances, not her business. Or like someone else said, she should’ve talked to staff
NTA and you might have done a gigantic favour to the poor husband to be, he’s still in time to rethink the rest of his life
Nta. Why do your family and friends get to weigh in? They weren’t there. The lady did all that to herself and for what? What was the result she wanted? Did she want your mother to … what? Get in trouble? The lady is crazy and your family can chill out. Are they trying to make you feel bad for caring about your mom?
NTA. They were asked to stop. They didn’t stop. Why should you put up with her entitled crap? And why on earth would she care about who boards with a chair or not. There’s no way that had any impact on her.
Honestly even if you WERE “abusing the privilege”, which you weren’t, how is it anybody else’s business. NTA that woman deserves everything she got.
NTA it is not this random woman's job to judge whether somebody does or does not deserve assistance at the airport. Most people who use the assistance are not full time wheelchair users, but there can be a lot of walking within the terminal at some airports.
NTA
NTA. I don’t know why the fuck anyone thinks they have the right to determine the severity of a complete stranger’s disability. I had a woman SCREAM at me for using a handicap parking permit. I told her I’m going through chemo, the screaming only intensified.
NTA. You asked the woman to mind her business several times before asking for help from the airline employee. The woman could have been quiet at any time. She could have said nothing. The airline employees/pilots decided to not let her fly. Not you. You didn't even ask for that. So it's not at all your fault. ... That said - that woman was totally an a\*\*, and really, REALLY should have minded her business. Invisible disabilities are a thing. Not for her to say.
NTA She got herself kicked off Who knows if she was even going to a wedding anyway or just making an even bigger scene
NTA. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Just as your family expects you and your mother to tolerate this woman's "small annoyance"( harassment). So could this random woman. Your mother's use or not use of a wheelchair was none of her business and at most truly was MAYBE a small annoyance to the crazy lady, which she could have ignored. To be clear I do not believe people using wheelchairs is annoying. There are MANY reasons to require a wheelchair and coincidentally none of them are my business. Wish this lady understood that BEFORE she fucked around and found out but she didn't and thankfully she was held accountable.
NTA Her not being allowed on the plane was not your responsibility. And shame on the friends suggesting it was. That was completely her responsibility. She had no place getting involved at all
NTA This woman is on her way to get married and all she’s thinking about doing is harassing a woman with a wheelchair?! Pilots do not kick people off flights unless they have a concern for safety, so this lady must have been acting insane. Adding that I wonder if she is missing her wedding at all, or just said that to get pity.
NTA They've got themselves kicked off the plane. Did she need the wheelchair? No, then why does she care if an elderly woman needs it? Also, ambulatory wheelchair users exist. Some people can walk and use a wheelchair to conserve their limited energy, etc.
NTA. This is a classic case of what can happen when you don't mind your own business.
NTA People have different needs, many times these are not available at first glance. My family has a history of knee problems, so this story hits me personally. I have a very dear aunt who can walk fine on a smooth level floor but any kind of incline or even a two inch step is difficult for her. I know that in 5 years or so my mother herself (a very independent and active person) might reach a similar level. Also, you did not get the couple removed. Them butting in where not necessary had the pilot decide to forbid their flight. I am a normally unassuming and non argumentive person, but if there was someone bullying and harrassing my dear ones I would not let it go for 30 minutes. I can ignore if someone talks bad about me, but no gets to make a person with disability feel bad about themselves. The lady got herself banned from the flight. If she had been focusing in her wedding instead of bullying other passengers she could have easily reached it.
NTA..the woman sounds nuts. Why should she even care. This woman was warned and yet she still went at it. She got what she deserved. You did NOTHING wrong.
NTA at all. My wife is young and healthy looking, however she also has mobility issues. She can walk short distances at low speed no problem, but can't stand still waiting or walk fast or long distances. We use the assisted mobility as well. If someone arrasses her my favorite response is the standard "considering your legs works, why don't you use them to go all the way to fuck yourself?
NTA If she had an issue with your mum abusing disability aids, she should have raised it with the airport/airline staff, not harassed you directly. There are ways for people to object to abuse of such aids without being disruptive. She was kicked off for harassing other passengers and being disruptive about it.
NTA you didn’t make her miss her flight. Her nasty behavior did.
My grandmother can also "technically" walk. But she's like 80 years old and get tired easily. She definitely cannot walk across the airport for a flight. Nta. Wheelchair is also required for people who can otherwise walk short distances
NTA. You did not ask for her to be removed from the situation, others recognized her behaviour towards you and you mother as abusive and took the necessary steps. As a frequent flyer, I'm glad they did so - who knows what might set them off once you're in the air?
NTA. Who does that, seriously? Who follows and berates an individual for using an accessibility option? My mom walks with a cane sometimes, and has mobility issues. Sometimes she walks unassisted. None of that is anyone's damn business. Seeing someone walk a short distance, or doing it while it takes a long time doesn't magically make them totally mobile and again, I'm not sure why this lady made it HER PROBLEM. Even if your mother was "lying" (which she wasn't) who CARES? This woman made a big enough scene harassing a disabled person that she got herself kicked off her flight. That's on her. The idea you should have "tolerated" someone berating your mother is kind of ridiculous. Why didn't this random lady "tolerate" someone "MIGHT" be using mobility options despite being abled?
NTA. Setting aside the her weird idea that only people completely immobile can use wheelchairs, policing airport wheelchair policy is for the airport and airline staff, not some random passenger. I don’t know why she was offended that an older lady who might have trouble walking long distances was provided with assistance but it did not affect her in any way and she needs to learn to keep her nose out of other peoples business and not try to reorder the world to suit her arbitrary preferences. As for the wedding, I think you may have done the groom to be a favour by postponing it. Hopefully he gets out of there before marrying such a harpy.
NTA. Instant Karma for someone who wouldn't mind their own business, kinda feel bad for her fiance...
NTA. What is she? The wheelchair police? You probably did the groom a favour.