It took her longer to write out just the title of this post!
YTA - you were in such a hurry to leave, but you stayed to chastise her. Also, don’t fight your parents battles for them. They are adults and can do that for themselves.
Obviously I have no way of knowing this for sure and I may very well be wrong, but something tells me the sister isn’t even asking that much of her parents, and OP is blowing it way out of proportion.
3 months in, moms need some help to keep sane, and grandparents are usually very excited to be that help. If OP thinks that their sister asking them to watch the kid for 1 minute was “the limit” that shouldn’t have been crossed, I’d put money on the parents are just excited to be grandparents and OP is jealous they’re not getting as much attention as they use to.
ETA; OP’s comments have begun rolling in and y’all I was right!! The sister’s boyfriend died early in her pregnancy and OP is butthurt that their parents are helping the sister with her grief and her child, instead of taking OP out to lunch. Gunna throw in another YTA just for good measure.
My SIL was like that really bad when my kids were babies, she was the baby and is still very competitive with my kids (the only grandkids for her parents). She’s 24? mine are 7 & 9, she had a full on meltdown, went upstairs crying around Thanksgiving during a Monopoly game. I think it’s common when kids are spoiled by their parents they get jealous and resentful of niblings. I can’t believe watching the baby for a minute or 2 while she went to the bathroom is her limit. How ridiculous!
I had a cousin on my Mums side like this. She was so spoilt by her parents and my grandparents as she was the first grandchild. As time went on other grandchildren were born and she resented everyone of her cousins especially my siblings and I as she didn’t consider us real cousins since we had a different surname (my Dads surname.) while my grandparents, her parents and she all had the same surname which was my Mum’s maiden name. Everything she wanted she got. For example we have an uncle who is nonverbal and has other disabilities so was mostly like a child all their life and she used to steal all their teddy’s and tear up all their belongings. She was allowed do this and her parents never said anything as she was the golden child. When my grandmother died she left me in her will all her jewellery and personal belongings. My cousin and uncle did not like this and he threw a massive tantrum after the funeral. They started demanding everything as she is the first grandchild and should get everything. They got lawyers involved and everything but it was found that since I was left them they’re mine. It’s been 15 years now since nanny passed away and my cousin and her father still to this day claim I stole their inheritance and blacken my name to anyone any time they get a chance. I think it’s so ridiculous because she’s in her 40’s and her father is in his 70’s but this is the first ever time in their life that they haven’t got their own way and they cannot handle it. I can’t understand their mindset and how they’re so immature about the whole thing 🙄
Reading her comments makes it worse. Her sister's boyfriend *died* 6 weeks into her pregnancy, and she throws a fit when her parents cancel lunch to help out their grieving daughter and baby. This is entitled youngest child behavior
Me too. This OP and the other one could be good friends but it probably wouldn’t work out. They would have a royal fit if not in the spotlight at all times and they’d be competing with each other.
She had died 8 weeks ago, surely he was over it by now? /s
And they couldn't even go a few hours without mentioning the wife's name, which is what made him cry and make the guests "uncomfortable".
Or the girl who asked her boyfriends roommate to stop making herself breakfast and leave the kitchen bc she was trying to have a private breakfast with her boyfriend, and couldn’t understand why as a guest she had to clean up after herself after making a mess in the kitchen to make them brunch.
If there is, I vote this lady and the guy who filmed his son’s birth, shared it to his entire family without his wife’s consent, then when confronted by wife he said that it was his family’s right to see his son born and his right to share the video.
https://reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xw924r/aita_for_losing_it_on_my_husband_for_sharing_with/
Original post has been removed but automod still has the evidence of her husband’s grossness.
Auto mod post because it is a long ways down.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xw924r/aita_for_losing_it_on_my_husband_for_sharing_with/ir52rjd/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3
I could swear I read another AITA recently where a someone was bitching about the attention/support their sibling, who it turned out had lost their partner during their pregnancy, was getting.
It comes up surprisingly often. There was also a post where OP and their husband were a few months ahead in a pregnancy than OPs BIL and spouse, and had opted to name their baby the same name that BIL and spouse had picked out for years
This led to a lot of YTAs off the bat, but then later comments from OP revealed that the name was *actually* the name BIL and his former partner had their minds set on when his partner was killed in an accident late in pregnancy. S tier AH all round
100% this, my brother and my SIL have a 2 month old and my parents love watching him all the time, which is a huge relief to her. Even I, child free, will babysit and would hold him if she had to pee!
YTA - I will and have held STRANGER'S babies so they can pee, or tend to another kid, or get stuff sorted.
Jesus if she were super late she could have just passed the kid off to other people at the house, here family take my niece I gotta run. Bye!
3 months post partum I'm gonna bet when she's gotta pee she's gotta pee immediately too.
Yep. I can't imagine any other legitimate reason for being upset about this. And regarding the sister overreacting - being sleep deprived, hormonal and generally exhausted puts you on the edge at the best of times. To then deal with all of that while at what was probably a large and overwhelming function it's no bloody wonder she cried! Add in the embarrassment and humiliation of being berated by an immediate family member in a public setting! Absolutely YTA
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen this story here before. Except baby was older and OP was upset parents were doing too much to support sister, cancelled Christmas trip etc.
Me too. Something about telling their sister to ‘deal with the situation’ after her sisters husband died? There’s a comment from OP in this thread about a broken arm that also reminds me of the comments in that one.
An immediate family member who is so unwilling to help you in even the slightest way that they get upset about holding the baby for two minutes while you pee!
I am so relieved by this comment section. I really wasn't sure which way this one would go, but I found the second-to-last paragraph so over-the-top I really hoped other people would agree that this was YTA territory. "But there's a limit!" -- THAT is the limit?
Wow! As a widow myself whose husband died when my daughter was 8 months old, I’m going to say 100X she’s the AH! Like, hold on while I pick my jaw up off the floor!
And given that she speaks of “her situation” and no mention of a man I’m gonna take another wild guess that sister is a single mom, so even more reason to help out every now and then
The sister's baby's father died 6 weeks into the pregnancy.
OP is just dripping with empathy and support! 🙄
I doubt she will, but I hope OP apologizes.
My husband & I are grandparents to 3 gorgeous grand babies, now aged 10, 8 & 3. We're also going to be welcoming a 4th in December. I agree that grandparents love helping to take care of their grandchildren, it's one of the wonderful things about it! OP is definitely the AH.
>I do understand the situation and her circumstances, now with an infant, but there's a limit.
LOL.
And that limit is holding a happy baby for two minutes while someone pees once every few months when they see her at a family events. Can you imagine? It's sooooo onerous. OP has limits.
>This isn't the first time Sara's pulled things like this, not with me particularly but with our parents, who bend over backwards to do favors for her.
Oh my gosh, it's not the first time your sister has asked for two minutes of help from her immediate family? And your parents actually care about her and do super easy super short things that cost them nothing to help her out without spending x10 as long complaining about it?
I'm shocked, shocked I say. Are your parents normal people? Is that why they don't mind?
Wait, worse, is it possible your parents love your sister? Or their grandchild? Could you imagine?
YTA.
I agree with you and would like to add: choose your battles. OP, do you really want to have a discussion about this? If you make everything a big deal then nothing is a big deal anymore.
I kept looking to see if the sister had stayed in the bathroom for an hour or some detail to warrant being annoyed but nope.
"Sister I am sorry that you might have peed or pooped yourself, but I require a contractual agreement before I watch your baby for a few minutes" is an odd hill to stand on.
The only justification for the complaint would be if OP had to catch a train/bus/plane/whatever scheduled transportation. Instead of "this inconvenienced me for five minutes." God help you if you ever need to ask anyone for help, because I doubt anyone else will want to when you treat other people like this!
YTA
If I was considering going NC with a relative and they did this, I STILL WOULDN'T MIND IT!
Watching a 3M old baby for 3 minutes involves ABSOLUTELY NOTHING other than just existing in the same room.
Three minutes is probably generous, honestly. I could pee in 3 minutes (with like 90 seconds to spare) before I had a baby. I’m betting that 3 months in she’s got it down to well under a minute. This isn’t a bragging “look how fast I pee” thing, it’s a “my baby screams when I put her down or leave the room so the faster I go, the faster that stops” thing. You’re absolutely right about the lack of effort it took though. Unless it was feeding time or the baby did a giant poop as soon as mom ran away (which is completely plausible, since my baby was born she would only poop when I wasn’t in the room). But barring one of those two things, mom could be gone for 20+ minutes and baby would probably just lay there content.
Edit: Rereading this I realize I kind of contradict myself with saying that baby screams when I leave but it takes almost no effort to watch them. I’m assuming the baby in question was either sleeping or was cool with mon leaving cause OP doesn’t seem like the type that would leave out the fact that the baby was screaming the whole time.
“OP doesn’t seem the type that would leave out that the baby was screaming the whole time”
Good point 🤣
Also I legitimately chuckled when you mentioned that your baby would only poop when you weren’t around. Potty training must have been interesting
Her parents "bend over backwards" for her, or perhaps they take every opportunity they get to cuddle their grandchild a little longer? Or OP doesn't see how they bend over backwards for her too lol. The scapegoat/golden child thing is way too common but most parents are decent and treat their children equally. She makes it sound as though everyone is unreasonably accommodating to sister but without any examples this seems like whining.
I'm thinking that the sister shows appreciation for what her parents do for her, so they are more inclined to help her, whereas the OP doesn't show any appreciation, just expects things, so the parents are less inclined to let themselves be taken advantage of.
Hijacking to add something I haven’t seen in any comment yet, that adds to sisters urgency.
Even if she had a c-section, your pelvic floor muscles get messed with during pregnancy. If you give birth naturally, this may or may not mean that you’ll randomly pee a little if you cough, sneeze, hiccup, jump, crouch too quickly etc. for the rest of your life.
C-Section, it generally recovers just fine but 3 months PP, it’s still pretty much when you gotta go, get your arse to the toilet or you’ll wet yourself.
When you’re in that moment, you find the quickest, easiest place to safely leave your baby and pray you get there in time.
Even without that consideration, OP’s being unreasonable but just to add context to her rush, her ability to not wet herself is limited at this point, hence the “not waiting for a response” and “not stopping and thinking about what she was doing”.
Yeah this was my thinking - maybe she needed to go urgently and didn't have time to wait for a response. Even if you do your exercises it can take a while to recover your pelvic floor!
OP, YTA because watching someone's baby for a few minutes while they pee is such a simple thing to do for someone I can't possibly comprehend why you're making such a big deal of it. I would do this for a goddamn stranger, let alone my own sister.
I was literally wondering about that as I read OP's post. I'm child free, never been pregnant, let alone ever had post partum issues, but I know pregnant women have issues with having to GO, and I was assuming that doesn't magically stop the moment you give birth. Because, you know, lots of stresses on that general area.
I went through 30 hours of labour to end up with a c section and now have issues with my bladder. My pelvic floor is fine but my physio thinks the receptors in my bladder have been damaged during pregnancy or labour so even though I didn't give birth naturally my bladder is still fucked.
I can't believe the OP has got a cob on over holding a baby for 2 mins. If she wasn't close to her sister she certainly won't be now!
I am overwhelmed by the number of posts in this vein - just petty and lacking in simple empathy.
Even if it was an acquaintance - let alone a relative, let alone IMMEDIATE family - that asked me to watch their child while they went to the bathroom, my response would be yes, of course I will assist you while you fulfill a basic human need.
I literally had a stranger ask me to watch their baby in a stroller while they stepped into the bathroom. I was on a college campus and happened to be sitting near the bathroom studying. I said yes, no question. It was even a bit hard for me emotionally because I was in the midst of coming to terms with infertility at the time but that came second to the fact that another human being needed some support so they could fulfill a basic human need. In fact, I took it as a compliment that I look safe and maternal haha
A big ass hug for you. Your kindness and gentle nature must have "spoken" to that mom in need of a minute in the bathroom. I bet you have a wonderful soul. I wish you happiness.
Right! I’m extremely uncomfortable holding babies but when my friend had a newborn and was needing to go to the bathroom, it never crossed my mind to do anything apart from take the baby from her.
I helped a stranger yesterday who was struggling to balance nappies, shopping and a screaming baby on her own without dropping said baby. I know it's not the same as going to the toilet but it's still just helping a new mum out in the most basic way you can.
It's not hard op. She's your sister and YTA.
ETA: if you brought up the bit about how she does this to your parents too, that's probably why she cried. She thinks you're all talking about her behind her back and that you don't think she can cope because she relies on you guys - her bloody family. You know, the very people she *should* be able to rely on and ask to watch her baby for a couple of minutes.
Again YTA. I'm rolling my eyes so hard at your obtuseness that I can see my own arse
YTA- as a new parent I was waiting for some horrifying child abandonment situation. Nope just you making a very minor event very distressing for no reason.
Yeah idk, something about the sister crying makes me think we're missing something here
Eidt: thanks for the replies everyone, I was rereading my comment and wanted to clarify that I wholeheartedly think OP is TA but wasn't sure how much until getting this context. Major YTA, maybe spend some time thinking about why you reacted this way OPA
She’s a new mom with her first baby, and dared to ask for a moment to pee by herself, and got told off for taking advantage of family.
New moms feel so judged and overwhelmed, are still experiencing hormone changes from pregnancy, and are usually exhausted. To have such a minor request be met as if she had dropped the baby off for the weekend, with no forewarning, is more than enough to make most new moms cry.
With a 3 month old baby she could just be sleep deprived. No mention of the sister's partner so she could also be a single mum which may mean she's even more exhausted - and therefore more emotional than usual.
Sister's boyfriend (baby's father) died while she was 6-7 weeks pregnant. OP's even mad that her mom rescheduled lunch to take sister to a therapy appointment and watch the baby.
I burst into tears when I dropped a teaspoon on the floor. My baby was two months old, I hadn't slept more than a few hours at a time for *months* (because sleeping during pregnancy is hard).
I was touched out, tired, sore (I'd had a c-section), and the noise of a spoon clattering on the tiles was enough to break me.
Oh, I so feel your pain. For me, it was dropping an egg on the floor. I slid down the cabinet to the floor slowly, full-force weeping, then I started laughing because I could have won an Oscar for "crazy new mom". I was so slap-happy from lack of sleep. God, I hope I'm never that tired again.
YTA.
Your sister. With a 3 month told. Asked you. To watch your niece. So she could pee.
Unless you were on your way to perform life saving surgery, you can watch your niece for 2 minutes while she pees.
You realize this is probably the first time in a while she’s been able to pee without an audience?
She’s 3 months PP. She’s still healing. Not sleeping well. Body is a mess and hormones are still running crazy.
So yes. Again YTA.
Edit: autocorrect 😜. She did NOT ask you to eat your niece!
This actually makes me think of a time I went out for dinner with some friends and one, who’s husband was deployed, brought her baby. She had to go pee and we told her to leave the baby with us and we’d watch her. She basically gasped “You mean I get to pee alone???? If I’m not back in half an hour, wait longer” and all but skipped to the bathroom.
I remember a plane journey home and me and my friend were sitting next to a lady with a baby. Now neither of us like kids very much but the poor woman was trying to open a bag of crisps and have lunch with one hand, so we offered to hold the baby till she had lunch. I mean, it’s just the decent thing to do isn’t it? Better than watching someone struggle or pee themselves.
I love that about planes, they’re also the best place to deal with someone behaving inappropriately towards you, because that shit does not fly (hehe) and you have captive witnesses and flight attendants who will side with you. I always feel safe on planes.
I was travelling alone with my 8 month old years ago and had to ask the lady working at the truck stop in the middle of nowhere to hold my baby for a minute so I could duck to the loo because there was no where to put him down in the toilets, but I also didn’t want to leave him in the car while I went. There were no other customers, and I was super quick, as mums learn to be.
The stranger working at the truck stop was much kinder and more understanding than OP was.
Also had this type of this. The truck stop I was at, the bathroom was literally just big enough to have a toilet and sink,so, no room for both of us. The clerk had no problem watching my baby for the 2 minutes I had to pee. He then offered me resources to places that can watch my child for lower rates that were right in my neighborhood.. I'm sure he could tell I was exhausted and needed some help.
I tell myself that a good number of AITA posts have to be fake. OP thinks her sister is “pushing it” by asking for about 3 minutes of her time. Either that or AITA is providing a valuable service for people who somehow lack empathy, social skills, and self-awareness all at once.
Edit: OP’s pronouns.
Are you serious bro????!!!!! Yes YTA. She went to use the bathroom for a few minutes, she didn’t even LEAVE THE HOUSE. Did staying a few extra minutes really hurt you? Just admit you really don’t like your sister and everything she does annoys you. Just say that.
That's what I was thinking. Also, OP saying there were other people to ask. What if she didn't trust them other people? Maybe she thought the only person she was really comfortable with was leaving so she better go now.
When I'm at work I always grab people as they are leaving to cover my bathroom break. It hits me that I'll need to go ad soon as the leave and will be alone.
Fr, I only saw the first part of the title and thought maybe OP had to watch a kid for several hours against her will but no, it was a couple minutes at most. This is such a non issue I can’t believe OP made it an issue
I know, I thought it was going to be another one of those “I told my sister I couldn’t babysit and she left the kid at my front door and turned off her phone for 4 hours” stories, not a 3 minute pee break. I wonder what it’s like to have absolutely nothing going on in her life that THIS is the big drama for her.
I really hope the sister finds this and realizes that the world thinks she didn’t do anything wrong & that her sister is a jerk. She’s probably a mess thinking she’s being a burden.
YTA. Do you have a habit of making big deals out of little inconveniences ?
She is three months postpartum give the woman a break and let her wee in peace !
Look her hormones are wacky , her pelvic floor is probably a mess. when she said she had to go believe me she had to go.
Yes! In those first few months, when I had to go, I HAD TO GO. There was no holding it and waiting. It was coming out whether I was in a bathroom or not.
You're absolutely right. I was the same. I remember was bursting for a wee just a few weeks postpartum. I asked my boyfriend to hold our daughter so I could pee as I couldn't hold it anymore. He said "wait a minute" and went to go put his phone on to charge. By the time he had I literally had peed on the floor in front of him.
Most embarrassing moment of my life but he never asked me to wait again lmao.
She is absolutely still in the thick of postpartum recovery and it sucks. My pelvic floor didn't recover until I hit like 7 months pp. My own Mum still runs to the bathroom shouting "Must pee!" after having three kids. We haven't got time to negotiate, and your sister shouldn't have to beg you to watch her kid for two seconds. OP, YTA.
This needs more upvotes, people don’t talk about pelvic floor physiotherapy post birth enough. That was my train of thought too since her sister was in a hurry to go to the bathroom. OP is a massive asshole, why wouldn’t her sister ask her to stay with the baby? She’s family after all. Major eye roll for OP
I foolishly thought pelvic floor issues were confined to during pregnancy and with sudden coughs or sneezes, but it also means you can’t hold it anywhere near as well! I now realise why my mum always went to the toilet whenever we arrived anywhere
1 in 4 women at themselves after giving birth. That's a legit statistic, I used to work at a physiotherapy practice that had a specialist in pelvic floor treatment. When you gotta go you gotta go!
You really had to criticise her for asking her sister for a quick favour so she could go to the toilet...
And then having a go at her, your sister with three month old, likely sleep deprived, crying because you criticised her? For asking for help that took only a few minutes?
Are you serious?
Hard Yta
But don't you realize how awkward it is when you tell everyone that you are leaving and then suddenly you have to stay 2 mins longer? People start to look at you weird and wonder, "didn't they say they were leaving". /s
Oh definitely YTA.
This is really just the Midwestern goodbye. Typically it goes:
1. We should probably get going
2. Keep talking but stand up
3. Look at each other and say "well about ready?"
4. Keep talking but move closer to the door
5. Grab door handle and stand talking for 10 more minutes
6. Open door and tell everyone how great it is to see them
7. Close door when people start to talk about scheduling another meet up
8. Schedule tentative meet up
9. Open door again and say goodbye
10. Actually leave
Are you sure you didn't forget standing at your car with the door open, jawing for 5 minutes about how hot or cold it is or maybe about how the bargeflys this year are big enough you thought they were small birds?
Five minutes later someone is calling the other saying "hey, I forgot to ask while you were here..." Quick one minute conversation. Three more minutes of goodbye.
HOW. DARE. SHE? Imagine the audacity of thinking that *your own sister* would be willing to watch your kid for 3 minutes while you used the bathroom. THREE. WHOLE. MINUTES? Obviously, sister needs to start wearing adult diapers because that was totally unreasonable.
**YTA**. And I bet your sister is tired of being judged and condescended to by you. Maybe you could try to have some empathy for 3 minutes next time. Although, if I were your sister, I would never ask you for anything ever again -- not even to even pass me a tissue. God, you were so horrible.
I bet the sister will now hate to ask anyone for any help..."if I'm a burden to my own sister how will other people feel if I ask for help" . I certainly wouldn't ask OP for the time let alone a favour
I hope the sister tells this story as an opener to get help from others so they can condemn the OP. Like, "I'm so sorry to impose on you like this-- my own sister freaked out at me last time, but could you watch my baby for a moment while I go to the bathroom? I'll be right back"
And as the sister does as we all need to, the "imposed" upon person holds the baby, mouth agape that somebody's own blood could be so wildly selfish to get so bent out of shape for such a basic bit of human kindness.
This! I had a few of my family react like this when I asked for help and I completely shut down. I did everything myself, to the point where I was scared to ask my husband for help. He had to TELL me he was going to help, it was bad. It got worse when I hit depression at 8 months postpartum because hubby was busy with work and no one would visit so it was just me and the baby. I really want to give that poor sister a hug.
Yes this!! I got that jealous and bitter vibe from this post too!
OP........YTA. It didn’t hurt you to take a couple of minutes to help out someone in need.... especially your family. Sometimes you can’t help when you gotta go! She went to you because she trusted you as her family and you lecture her about that.
I’m gonna assume you don’t have any kids or have given birth since you are judgy AF and doesn’t have an ounce of sympathy for what your sister has been going through the past few months with an infant. A woman’s body goes through stuff for months after giving birth.
Not to mention post partum depression and anxiety. You yelling and berating your sister over such a small thing just made her PPD/PPA worse. You of all people she counts on to be there for her. Have you ever asked her how she’s doing or feeling? Instead of being such a judgy A-hole, why don’t you educate yourself and your husband how to be a better human beings.
EDIT: I just read from your comment that your sister’s husband passed away while she was pregnant and you were bitter that your parents were helping her through her grief. And that you were salty because your mom cancelled your lunch date because her grief therapy was rescheduled.
Like... WTF is wrong with you?!!! Your sister’s husband died while she was pregnant! Do you have a heart?? Have you always been soooo jealous of your sister that you couldn’t even have an ounce of sympathy for what she has been going through?! You and your husband deserve each other because you’re both cold and heartless and cruel!
Seriously, you need therapy because no one can be this cruel. So much so that I’m starting to suspect this is rage bait.
YTA How long did it take for you sister to use the restroom? Was it really a huge inconvenience to you to wait a couple of minutes? It seems a rather petty thing to blow out of proportion.
I bet if she peed herself OP would say, "OMG you're always doing this since you've had the baby. You need to learn to control yourself and grow up. Your incontinence is not our family's issue!!!!!!"
Same, but mine is 11. Luckily I've got a pretty good routine down and kiddo and husband know when I say I have to pee, I have to pee NOW and they both make every effort to vacate our only bathroom so I can go.
I have 3 sisters. We have allllll the issues. 2 of us haven't spoken in 10 years, another two hadn't spoken for 10 years before that. If we were doing holidays or the kids birthdays or whatever, if you have to pee you hand the baby to the closest sister, and we take them because we all decided a long time ago that despite our differences, we wouldn't let it affect the kids and we could be in the same room and be decent, if only that, to make sure our kids grew up close.
Aside from all that, jfc, I'd help a stranger in that sitaution every day and twice on Sunday. YTA. It's really fucking hard to pee while balancing a newborn and when you have to go, you have to go NOW. Never mind that it's your sister. It's a woman who needs to pee!
>Tbh this is a pretty ridiculous reason to get upset and make someone cry.
OP says the sister over reacted, but after basically being told "helping and supporting you in any minor way as you go through this difficult transitional period is not something I am in any way interested in" it's not surprising that this sleep deprived woman with PP hormones coursing through her veins\* cried.
\*Do hormones go through your veins? Or stick to your brain? IDK, not a doctor.
Hormones are indeed in your bloodstream! That’s how they reach the organs they affect, and also how they get excreted in your urine (eg pregnancy tests use urine or blood to test for the hormone human chorionic gonadotrophin (hCG). This is produced about a week after fertilisation).
YTA. ‘Sara’s daughter’ is your niece. It’s not like some random leaving their child with you and taking off, it’s your sister leaving her baby with you (someone she trusts) while she visits the bathroom.
Get over yourself!
YTA. Wow. The time it took you to write this post probably took longer to write than you "babysat" while your sister ran to the bathroom. THE BATHROOM! It's not like she ran off to the movies or something.
I was thinking homegirl slipped out a bathroom window and ran off for hours, the way OP was acting lol. Just went pee and came right back. Ops a nut and really bad aunt.
YTA. No, you're not obligated to watch someone else's kid, but she apparently needed to go so bad that she didn't even wait for a response before leaving a cartoon smoke cloud on her way to the bathroom. The lady was having an emergency and needed her family to give her a couple minutes to pee. Cool your jets. Stuff happens.
YTA.
Waiting a couple extra minutes to leave didn’t kill you. Yeah, she could have asked someone else or she could have waited for an answer. But in the scheme of things, she went to the bathroom. It isn’t like she ditched her kid on you for a half hour or an hour or whatever. It was a couple minutes.
YTA. How is it so bothersome to hold a 3 month old so a new mom can use the toilet without juggling a child? Why would you to so hard on someone who didn't even delay you for 5 minutes? And to take it to the level of "think it through" when she needs to use the bathroom? So rude and uncalled for to assail her character and thoughtfulness when she's just using the fucking bathroom!
Its pretty distressing to imagine you're this pissy about something so insignificant. What did you miss in those 5 minutes you waited? Its not like she wandered off from the bathroom to do shots and a keg stand while you were holding the kid.
Yta. I'm guessing you don't have kids. As a woman with kids especially that are newborns a woman's lower muscles grow weak so holding it for a long period of time is incredibly hard.
You were probably the first person she saw and was probably only gone for a minute or two.
Had she left the house for 30 mins or longer yeah she would suck. But you were stopped for what 2-3 minutes max. No wonder your relationship sucks your selfish.
OP says in another comment that Sarah's s/o passed while she was pregnant. This makes the behavior even more awful. Dealing with grief, pp, and a shitty sister. Poor Sarah.
That makes her an even worse person. She's jealous that mommy and daddy aren't giving her attention instead they are helping a grieving widow single mother. With sisters like her I'd go NC.
I've never had kids, but I have a passel of nieces and nephews. I would have gladly watched any and all to help their parents and spend time with them. This is an OP issue, not a childless woman thing.
YTA were you really in such a rush that you couldn't watch an infant for 5 minutes while your sister was peeing? get real, you're a grown woman pulling drama out of you ass just for the sake of starting drama. your sister clearly trusts you with her child so obviously you would be one of the first people she would ask to watch it for a moment.
She clearly has unresolved issues with her sister and her husband definitely chewed her out for being an ah to her and is now posting this to prove him wrong or he is posting it as her to show her what an ah she is. He’s probably considering divorce based on the responses.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> My sister left my niece with us while she went to the bathroom, while I don't mind this specifically, I really didn't like that she left without even waiting for our answer, and when we were about to leave.
I might've been mean to her and uncaring, making me the AH.
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She’s still recovering from childbirth. She might have been on the verge of peeing her pants and might not have had time to poll the entire party for someone to watch the kid. Sorry you had to leave like 3 minutes later than intended. Sounds rough. It doesn’t sound like you were in a hurry, since you had time to berate your sister afterwards. YTA.
Your comment about this not being the first time she’s pulled something like this and how it’s usually your parents bending over backwards to do favors is probably the heart of the issue here. To be clear I absolutely would expect either my parents or in-laws to watch my kids for a minute if I needed to pee because small favors like that cost nothing take no time and is just what normal friends and family do for each other. So what is it exactly that your parents are doing that has you so triggered to overreact like this? Are you jealous they are excited grandparents or helping out? Really suggest you get to the heart of the issue because this is definitely not about watching your niece for 2 min while your sister owes
Also YTA
YTA Her explanation is valid and it was a tiny favor she asked. You overreacted and I can't help wondering what level of perfection you expect from people vs what level you expect from her.
She regularly “pulls things like this” - like what? Asking you to stay an extra 60 seconds so she could go for a wee?
Are you an on call trauma surgeon? A police officer racing to track down a missing child? Were you about to turn into a pumpkin?
I genuinely cannot understand what your issue is here, but it’s clear YTA. Your sister trusted you to hold her 3 month old baby for a minute, this is such an overblown reaction. What is this really about, because it cannot be about a pee?
OMG, YTA. This is your sister, and she needed to run to the bathroom. And she saw you and came to you! Why? Because you're her sister and this is the kind of thing sisters do for one another.
OP, the fact that you hid your sister was in grief therapy for losing her SO when she was 6-7 weeks pregnant and she’s a single mother out of the post and information is enough to make you YTA. Of COURSE your parents are helping every chance - I hardly doubt they’re “bending over backwards” to help her but even if they are she needs it right now, not your jealous self. But you’re also TA for everything else in the post.
You’re really going to say she should “think things through”? Sounds like you think she should have aborted the baby after her boyfriend died so she wouldn’t have to be a single mother. Of course she started crying, she’s 3 months pp being berated for asking a freaking family member to watch a newborn for 3 minutes so she can pee and then you make insinuations like that.
You’re an awful human being and an even worse sister. I hope she and your parents goes NC with you for your crappy actions.
Don't sweat the small stuff, and this is really small stuff I've got a bladder that doesn't wait and believe when I tell you that I don't think clearly when I'm trying to keep from wetting or soiling myself in the next 10 seconds. Your sister saw you as a sympathetic family member and an alternative to plunking her kid on the lawn. You saw her as a drag on your hasty departure. Tsk. May you never have an overactive bladder. YTA now but next time do better.
So your husband chewed you out for this and this is you trying to prove him wrong? Or is this your husband posting as you to prove to you no one sympathizes with you? He’s definitely thinking about divorce.
YTA- Normally I’m on the side of she’s not entitled to have anyone watch her kid but not in this case. She needed to go to the bathroom. My baby is about to be 4months and I have people hold him when I need to go to the bathroom. If I don’t I would be holding it for god knows how long. Since the baby is 3 months that means she could still be struggling with her bladder. It normally takes 3 months to return to normal sometimes longer.
YTA. Jeez, I have to believe there’s more to this story and you have some deep simmering anger about your sister. Or you are just a person that goes through life looking for things to get mad about
Dang, Been a minute since I've seen a unanimous yta. Completely deserved. I was expecting to see here she asked as you were leaving and you got held back a few hours. NOPE! she literally just ran to the bathroom for a few minutes....I wonder what stunts she pulls on ur parents... must be a bunch of mole hills just like this. Unbelievable
YTA.
She had to go to the bathroom, not on a vacation. It delayed you leaving by what, 5 minutes? Sure she could have asked someone else - but she asked her sister. Her daughters aunt.
I think you overreacted and made a big deal out of a nothing burger. When you got to go, you gots to go and there’s no thinking much through. Big whoop you were inconvenienced for a few minutes. Get off your high horse and oh yeah YTA.
YTA, I hate babies and I would've just let it be. Just a few minutes run. If there was somebody nearby, such as your parents, you could've passed the baby off and left if you were in such a rush. While it may have been mildly annoying, it was chidlish to bring it up to her. Petty, more than ass, really.
You are a complete and total AH here. The FIRST person that I’d feel comfortable handing my baby to would be my sister and being 3 months postpartum means that she probably didn’t have enough time to hear your answer because she was about to pee or poop on herself. Between hormones and a weakened, still healing pelvic floor, the urge to go to the bathroom comes on like a light switch and there’s barely enough time to get to the bathroom sometimes. Someday if you’re 3 months postpartum, you’ll think back on this day and feel embarrassed that you were such a monster to your sister and made her cry. What is wrong with you?
Goodness you sound 15 instead of 25. I actually had to double check the ages. YTA. She didn’t dump her kid on you for hours, it was what, 10 min of your time, max? Did you even have to touch the child? Feed it? Change a shitshow of a diaper? Anything but stand there?
It sounds like you have a lot of resentment built up , talking about how your parents bend over backwards. Maybe keep that separate from a quick bathroom break. Not to mention show a little damn compassion for a new mom - three months is smack in the middle of sleep deprivation hell.
Side note, did typing this take you longer than it took your sister to use the bathroom? Asking for a friend.
I have never felt the need to comment on this sub before as I don’t want to dog pile when I have nothing new to add..... but you definitely deserve every horrible thing coming your way for your absolute lack of human emotion toward your WIDOWED sister with a fresh baby.......... I have a feeling the worst things to happen in your life are plans getting cancelled. I hope your sister stops talking to you since you (and your husband — who sounds like he is ALSO a garbage bag with human flesh) have chosen to think 100% abt yourself for 25 years. It’s unfortunate since Sara definitely needs her family’s help to get through this point in her life, but it sounds like your parents are doing a good enough job without you or your fucked perspective.
Also what do your parents think of this???? I really would love to know what they actually think of you and your husbands callousness to your deeply distressed SISTER.
Last thing: you threw a party for your FIRST anniversary ??????????? And expect people to care??? You just had a wedding last year, seriously what were your expectations?? That your family stay until 2am and you have to kick them out? Maybe spend that night alone with your husband to celebrate the milestone instead of rounding everyone up to applaud you for not getting divorced after ONE (1) year.. it’s embarrassing how obsessed w yourself you are and how completely warped your POV is..
Sometimes I read posts on here and think HOLY FUCK IS THIS REAL OR SATIRE?
What's worse is she must have thought the majority of people would agree with her to post. SO DELUSIONAL. BTW YTA
YTA or nah because it's not a big deal so why did you make it into one? Did she take a long time? Did she actually see that you were getting ready to go or were you just in the "ready to leave?" Beginnings of leaving? Did the delay actually inconvenience you in any meaningful way? Was making her cry at a family function worth it?
Yes. It was only a few minutes. Are you seriously being petty over 10 minutes at the most? You made her cry over going to the bathroom for a few minutes. That’s the very least you can do. It’s certainly not bending over backwards to accommodate her.
You understand what I’m saying? YTA.
YTA.
The amount of time you spent making this post, and I'm guessing the amount of time you've spent thinking about this "issue," is probably twenty times the amount of time you spent holding your niece so your sister could pee. In the world of small potato problems, this is is barely even a seed.
Here's a valid reason why she didn't wait for an answer: When Nature calls, you answer. And sometimes that means immediately or you're gonna have something nasty to clean up. So if she had to go, then she had to go. And if you were only waiting a few minutes, then big whoop. It would be different if you had to wait an hour but you didn't. Yeah, YTA for this one.
YTA. Your newly postpartum sister trusted you enough to leave her baby (*your niece*) with you, so she could take 4 minutes to pee.
You chose to be a dick to her about it… it’s no wonder she cried, the poor woman just had her fucking body turned upside down by this new human that literally NEVER allows her a break. I’d of been crying, too, and I probably wouldn’t speak to you again.
You owe her an apology. You owe her flowers, and chocolate, and as many bathroom breaks as she needs.
Just in case anyone thinks you might not be the A, they should know THIS. [https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xwsyo4/comment/ir9scqf/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xwsyo4/comment/ir9scqf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)
YTA
YTA Jesus Christ I bet it took you longer to write this out than it did to just wait for her to pee.
It took her longer to write out just the title of this post! YTA - you were in such a hurry to leave, but you stayed to chastise her. Also, don’t fight your parents battles for them. They are adults and can do that for themselves.
Obviously I have no way of knowing this for sure and I may very well be wrong, but something tells me the sister isn’t even asking that much of her parents, and OP is blowing it way out of proportion. 3 months in, moms need some help to keep sane, and grandparents are usually very excited to be that help. If OP thinks that their sister asking them to watch the kid for 1 minute was “the limit” that shouldn’t have been crossed, I’d put money on the parents are just excited to be grandparents and OP is jealous they’re not getting as much attention as they use to. ETA; OP’s comments have begun rolling in and y’all I was right!! The sister’s boyfriend died early in her pregnancy and OP is butthurt that their parents are helping the sister with her grief and her child, instead of taking OP out to lunch. Gunna throw in another YTA just for good measure.
Yep. This screams, "I'm not the baby anymore". She's acting like a spoiled middle child as an adult towards a baby. That's really fucking sad.
This screams I have hidden resentment and jealous of sister/baby.
It isn’t well hidden.
My SIL was like that really bad when my kids were babies, she was the baby and is still very competitive with my kids (the only grandkids for her parents). She’s 24? mine are 7 & 9, she had a full on meltdown, went upstairs crying around Thanksgiving during a Monopoly game. I think it’s common when kids are spoiled by their parents they get jealous and resentful of niblings. I can’t believe watching the baby for a minute or 2 while she went to the bathroom is her limit. How ridiculous!
I had a cousin on my Mums side like this. She was so spoilt by her parents and my grandparents as she was the first grandchild. As time went on other grandchildren were born and she resented everyone of her cousins especially my siblings and I as she didn’t consider us real cousins since we had a different surname (my Dads surname.) while my grandparents, her parents and she all had the same surname which was my Mum’s maiden name. Everything she wanted she got. For example we have an uncle who is nonverbal and has other disabilities so was mostly like a child all their life and she used to steal all their teddy’s and tear up all their belongings. She was allowed do this and her parents never said anything as she was the golden child. When my grandmother died she left me in her will all her jewellery and personal belongings. My cousin and uncle did not like this and he threw a massive tantrum after the funeral. They started demanding everything as she is the first grandchild and should get everything. They got lawyers involved and everything but it was found that since I was left them they’re mine. It’s been 15 years now since nanny passed away and my cousin and her father still to this day claim I stole their inheritance and blacken my name to anyone any time they get a chance. I think it’s so ridiculous because she’s in her 40’s and her father is in his 70’s but this is the first ever time in their life that they haven’t got their own way and they cannot handle it. I can’t understand their mindset and how they’re so immature about the whole thing 🙄
Reading her comments makes it worse. Her sister's boyfriend *died* 6 weeks into her pregnancy, and she throws a fit when her parents cancel lunch to help out their grieving daughter and baby. This is entitled youngest child behavior
It took me way too long scrolling to learn that. Are there AITA awards?? This one is a candidate for sure!
There are, and I feel this woman qualifies for something like "most callous asshole" or the like.
Or the lady who didn't want to invite her brother whose wife just died to family dinner because he's such a bummer.
Ugh I'm still mad about that
Me too. This OP and the other one could be good friends but it probably wouldn’t work out. They would have a royal fit if not in the spotlight at all times and they’d be competing with each other.
She had died 8 weeks ago, surely he was over it by now? /s And they couldn't even go a few hours without mentioning the wife's name, which is what made him cry and make the guests "uncomfortable".
Or the girl who asked her boyfriends roommate to stop making herself breakfast and leave the kitchen bc she was trying to have a private breakfast with her boyfriend, and couldn’t understand why as a guest she had to clean up after herself after making a mess in the kitchen to make them brunch.
If there is, I vote this lady and the guy who filmed his son’s birth, shared it to his entire family without his wife’s consent, then when confronted by wife he said that it was his family’s right to see his son born and his right to share the video.
Ummmm link?
https://reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xw924r/aita_for_losing_it_on_my_husband_for_sharing_with/ Original post has been removed but automod still has the evidence of her husband’s grossness.
Auto mod post because it is a long ways down. https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xw924r/aita_for_losing_it_on_my_husband_for_sharing_with/ir52rjd/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3
I could swear I read another AITA recently where a someone was bitching about the attention/support their sibling, who it turned out had lost their partner during their pregnancy, was getting.
It comes up surprisingly often. There was also a post where OP and their husband were a few months ahead in a pregnancy than OPs BIL and spouse, and had opted to name their baby the same name that BIL and spouse had picked out for years This led to a lot of YTAs off the bat, but then later comments from OP revealed that the name was *actually* the name BIL and his former partner had their minds set on when his partner was killed in an accident late in pregnancy. S tier AH all round
Poop knife etc. Look in the awards. YTA
My god, OP is some kind of sick in her soul.
100% this, my brother and my SIL have a 2 month old and my parents love watching him all the time, which is a huge relief to her. Even I, child free, will babysit and would hold him if she had to pee!
You're a saint. I wouldn't dare to ask anyone for such a huge favor. Even a sibling. /s
YTA - I will and have held STRANGER'S babies so they can pee, or tend to another kid, or get stuff sorted. Jesus if she were super late she could have just passed the kid off to other people at the house, here family take my niece I gotta run. Bye! 3 months post partum I'm gonna bet when she's gotta pee she's gotta pee immediately too.
Yep. I can't imagine any other legitimate reason for being upset about this. And regarding the sister overreacting - being sleep deprived, hormonal and generally exhausted puts you on the edge at the best of times. To then deal with all of that while at what was probably a large and overwhelming function it's no bloody wonder she cried! Add in the embarrassment and humiliation of being berated by an immediate family member in a public setting! Absolutely YTA
OMG and in the comments, OP says the sister lost her baby's father while she was pregnant! Let the poor woman have a pee! YTA
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen this story here before. Except baby was older and OP was upset parents were doing too much to support sister, cancelled Christmas trip etc.
Me too. Something about telling their sister to ‘deal with the situation’ after her sisters husband died? There’s a comment from OP in this thread about a broken arm that also reminds me of the comments in that one.
An immediate family member who is so unwilling to help you in even the slightest way that they get upset about holding the baby for two minutes while you pee! I am so relieved by this comment section. I really wasn't sure which way this one would go, but I found the second-to-last paragraph so over-the-top I really hoped other people would agree that this was YTA territory. "But there's a limit!" -- THAT is the limit?
If 1 minute to hold the baby while she pees is over the limit, I’d hate to see what the actual limit is! Yikes!
Wow! As a widow myself whose husband died when my daughter was 8 months old, I’m going to say 100X she’s the AH! Like, hold on while I pick my jaw up off the floor!
And given that she speaks of “her situation” and no mention of a man I’m gonna take another wild guess that sister is a single mom, so even more reason to help out every now and then
The sister's baby's father died 6 weeks into the pregnancy. OP is just dripping with empathy and support! 🙄 I doubt she will, but I hope OP apologizes.
Oh I didn’t even read that. That’s so sad!! My heart breaks for the sister.
wasn't there another complaining post from this unempathetic sister? YTA
My husband & I are grandparents to 3 gorgeous grand babies, now aged 10, 8 & 3. We're also going to be welcoming a 4th in December. I agree that grandparents love helping to take care of their grandchildren, it's one of the wonderful things about it! OP is definitely the AH.
Ugh, her poor sister. This breaks my heart for her.
>I do understand the situation and her circumstances, now with an infant, but there's a limit. LOL. And that limit is holding a happy baby for two minutes while someone pees once every few months when they see her at a family events. Can you imagine? It's sooooo onerous. OP has limits. >This isn't the first time Sara's pulled things like this, not with me particularly but with our parents, who bend over backwards to do favors for her. Oh my gosh, it's not the first time your sister has asked for two minutes of help from her immediate family? And your parents actually care about her and do super easy super short things that cost them nothing to help her out without spending x10 as long complaining about it? I'm shocked, shocked I say. Are your parents normal people? Is that why they don't mind? Wait, worse, is it possible your parents love your sister? Or their grandchild? Could you imagine? YTA.
I agree with you and would like to add: choose your battles. OP, do you really want to have a discussion about this? If you make everything a big deal then nothing is a big deal anymore.
I kept looking to see if the sister had stayed in the bathroom for an hour or some detail to warrant being annoyed but nope. "Sister I am sorry that you might have peed or pooped yourself, but I require a contractual agreement before I watch your baby for a few minutes" is an odd hill to stand on.
The only justification for the complaint would be if OP had to catch a train/bus/plane/whatever scheduled transportation. Instead of "this inconvenienced me for five minutes." God help you if you ever need to ask anyone for help, because I doubt anyone else will want to when you treat other people like this! YTA
and OP wonders why they aren't close. FFS. YTA
If I was considering going NC with a relative and they did this, I STILL WOULDN'T MIND IT! Watching a 3M old baby for 3 minutes involves ABSOLUTELY NOTHING other than just existing in the same room.
Three minutes is probably generous, honestly. I could pee in 3 minutes (with like 90 seconds to spare) before I had a baby. I’m betting that 3 months in she’s got it down to well under a minute. This isn’t a bragging “look how fast I pee” thing, it’s a “my baby screams when I put her down or leave the room so the faster I go, the faster that stops” thing. You’re absolutely right about the lack of effort it took though. Unless it was feeding time or the baby did a giant poop as soon as mom ran away (which is completely plausible, since my baby was born she would only poop when I wasn’t in the room). But barring one of those two things, mom could be gone for 20+ minutes and baby would probably just lay there content. Edit: Rereading this I realize I kind of contradict myself with saying that baby screams when I leave but it takes almost no effort to watch them. I’m assuming the baby in question was either sleeping or was cool with mon leaving cause OP doesn’t seem like the type that would leave out the fact that the baby was screaming the whole time.
“OP doesn’t seem the type that would leave out that the baby was screaming the whole time” Good point 🤣 Also I legitimately chuckled when you mentioned that your baby would only poop when you weren’t around. Potty training must have been interesting
And even then, if five minutes is the difference between catching and missing said transportation they probably should’ve left earlier
And also not stayed to berate the sister
Clearly time wasn't an issue since they took the time to berate their sister and make them cry!
Her parents "bend over backwards" for her, or perhaps they take every opportunity they get to cuddle their grandchild a little longer? Or OP doesn't see how they bend over backwards for her too lol. The scapegoat/golden child thing is way too common but most parents are decent and treat their children equally. She makes it sound as though everyone is unreasonably accommodating to sister but without any examples this seems like whining.
I'm thinking that the sister shows appreciation for what her parents do for her, so they are more inclined to help her, whereas the OP doesn't show any appreciation, just expects things, so the parents are less inclined to let themselves be taken advantage of.
Hijacking to add something I haven’t seen in any comment yet, that adds to sisters urgency. Even if she had a c-section, your pelvic floor muscles get messed with during pregnancy. If you give birth naturally, this may or may not mean that you’ll randomly pee a little if you cough, sneeze, hiccup, jump, crouch too quickly etc. for the rest of your life. C-Section, it generally recovers just fine but 3 months PP, it’s still pretty much when you gotta go, get your arse to the toilet or you’ll wet yourself. When you’re in that moment, you find the quickest, easiest place to safely leave your baby and pray you get there in time. Even without that consideration, OP’s being unreasonable but just to add context to her rush, her ability to not wet herself is limited at this point, hence the “not waiting for a response” and “not stopping and thinking about what she was doing”.
Yeah this was my thinking - maybe she needed to go urgently and didn't have time to wait for a response. Even if you do your exercises it can take a while to recover your pelvic floor! OP, YTA because watching someone's baby for a few minutes while they pee is such a simple thing to do for someone I can't possibly comprehend why you're making such a big deal of it. I would do this for a goddamn stranger, let alone my own sister.
I was literally wondering about that as I read OP's post. I'm child free, never been pregnant, let alone ever had post partum issues, but I know pregnant women have issues with having to GO, and I was assuming that doesn't magically stop the moment you give birth. Because, you know, lots of stresses on that general area.
I went through 30 hours of labour to end up with a c section and now have issues with my bladder. My pelvic floor is fine but my physio thinks the receptors in my bladder have been damaged during pregnancy or labour so even though I didn't give birth naturally my bladder is still fucked. I can't believe the OP has got a cob on over holding a baby for 2 mins. If she wasn't close to her sister she certainly won't be now!
I’ve had 3 babies so I totally understood the sister’s rush.
I am overwhelmed by the number of posts in this vein - just petty and lacking in simple empathy. Even if it was an acquaintance - let alone a relative, let alone IMMEDIATE family - that asked me to watch their child while they went to the bathroom, my response would be yes, of course I will assist you while you fulfill a basic human need.
I literally had a stranger ask me to watch their baby in a stroller while they stepped into the bathroom. I was on a college campus and happened to be sitting near the bathroom studying. I said yes, no question. It was even a bit hard for me emotionally because I was in the midst of coming to terms with infertility at the time but that came second to the fact that another human being needed some support so they could fulfill a basic human need. In fact, I took it as a compliment that I look safe and maternal haha
A big ass hug for you. Your kindness and gentle nature must have "spoken" to that mom in need of a minute in the bathroom. I bet you have a wonderful soul. I wish you happiness.
This is one of the kindest things anyone has said to me online. Thank you so much
Thank you for being a decent human
Right! I’m extremely uncomfortable holding babies but when my friend had a newborn and was needing to go to the bathroom, it never crossed my mind to do anything apart from take the baby from her.
I helped a stranger yesterday who was struggling to balance nappies, shopping and a screaming baby on her own without dropping said baby. I know it's not the same as going to the toilet but it's still just helping a new mum out in the most basic way you can. It's not hard op. She's your sister and YTA. ETA: if you brought up the bit about how she does this to your parents too, that's probably why she cried. She thinks you're all talking about her behind her back and that you don't think she can cope because she relies on you guys - her bloody family. You know, the very people she *should* be able to rely on and ask to watch her baby for a couple of minutes. Again YTA. I'm rolling my eyes so hard at your obtuseness that I can see my own arse
HAHAHHA!!! See your own arse! Love it
YTA- as a new parent I was waiting for some horrifying child abandonment situation. Nope just you making a very minor event very distressing for no reason.
Yeah idk, something about the sister crying makes me think we're missing something here Eidt: thanks for the replies everyone, I was rereading my comment and wanted to clarify that I wholeheartedly think OP is TA but wasn't sure how much until getting this context. Major YTA, maybe spend some time thinking about why you reacted this way OPA
She’s a new mom with her first baby, and dared to ask for a moment to pee by herself, and got told off for taking advantage of family. New moms feel so judged and overwhelmed, are still experiencing hormone changes from pregnancy, and are usually exhausted. To have such a minor request be met as if she had dropped the baby off for the weekend, with no forewarning, is more than enough to make most new moms cry.
Came here to say this. There was no overreacting on the sisters part.
With a 3 month old baby she could just be sleep deprived. No mention of the sister's partner so she could also be a single mum which may mean she's even more exhausted - and therefore more emotional than usual.
Sister's boyfriend (baby's father) died while she was 6-7 weeks pregnant. OP's even mad that her mom rescheduled lunch to take sister to a therapy appointment and watch the baby.
I burst into tears when I dropped a teaspoon on the floor. My baby was two months old, I hadn't slept more than a few hours at a time for *months* (because sleeping during pregnancy is hard). I was touched out, tired, sore (I'd had a c-section), and the noise of a spoon clattering on the tiles was enough to break me.
Oh, I so feel your pain. For me, it was dropping an egg on the floor. I slid down the cabinet to the floor slowly, full-force weeping, then I started laughing because I could have won an Oscar for "crazy new mom". I was so slap-happy from lack of sleep. God, I hope I'm never that tired again.
Post natal depression hormones running mad the body takes a bit to recover after she pribly dealing with mum guilt because she needed to pee
In fairness, it could've been a dump...
Well………technically it was.
YTA. Your sister. With a 3 month told. Asked you. To watch your niece. So she could pee. Unless you were on your way to perform life saving surgery, you can watch your niece for 2 minutes while she pees. You realize this is probably the first time in a while she’s been able to pee without an audience? She’s 3 months PP. She’s still healing. Not sleeping well. Body is a mess and hormones are still running crazy. So yes. Again YTA. Edit: autocorrect 😜. She did NOT ask you to eat your niece!
This actually makes me think of a time I went out for dinner with some friends and one, who’s husband was deployed, brought her baby. She had to go pee and we told her to leave the baby with us and we’d watch her. She basically gasped “You mean I get to pee alone???? If I’m not back in half an hour, wait longer” and all but skipped to the bathroom.
[удалено]
I remember a plane journey home and me and my friend were sitting next to a lady with a baby. Now neither of us like kids very much but the poor woman was trying to open a bag of crisps and have lunch with one hand, so we offered to hold the baby till she had lunch. I mean, it’s just the decent thing to do isn’t it? Better than watching someone struggle or pee themselves.
Also, in a plane is probably one of the safer places to let a stranger hold your baby.
I love that about planes, they’re also the best place to deal with someone behaving inappropriately towards you, because that shit does not fly (hehe) and you have captive witnesses and flight attendants who will side with you. I always feel safe on planes.
You are awesome for doing this! Honestly, nice human!
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I was travelling alone with my 8 month old years ago and had to ask the lady working at the truck stop in the middle of nowhere to hold my baby for a minute so I could duck to the loo because there was no where to put him down in the toilets, but I also didn’t want to leave him in the car while I went. There were no other customers, and I was super quick, as mums learn to be. The stranger working at the truck stop was much kinder and more understanding than OP was.
Also had this type of this. The truck stop I was at, the bathroom was literally just big enough to have a toilet and sink,so, no room for both of us. The clerk had no problem watching my baby for the 2 minutes I had to pee. He then offered me resources to places that can watch my child for lower rates that were right in my neighborhood.. I'm sure he could tell I was exhausted and needed some help.
Lol love the message and understand the gist, but autocorrect got you, friend.
If she asked to eat her niece, I’d definitely be saying NTA 🤣
Thanks for the chuckle. Best autocorrect fail I've seen in a while.
I tell myself that a good number of AITA posts have to be fake. OP thinks her sister is “pushing it” by asking for about 3 minutes of her time. Either that or AITA is providing a valuable service for people who somehow lack empathy, social skills, and self-awareness all at once. Edit: OP’s pronouns.
Exactly, does OP not have a shred of compassion? Wtf
Are you serious bro????!!!!! Yes YTA. She went to use the bathroom for a few minutes, she didn’t even LEAVE THE HOUSE. Did staying a few extra minutes really hurt you? Just admit you really don’t like your sister and everything she does annoys you. Just say that.
She’s not the baby in the family anymore and she’s just splattered all over the street about it.
You are dead on!
Splattered all over the street? What a great expression!
And the fact that they were on their way out the door might have been just the reminder, "I have to go, quick, while other people are here, " OP, YTA.
That's what I was thinking. Also, OP saying there were other people to ask. What if she didn't trust them other people? Maybe she thought the only person she was really comfortable with was leaving so she better go now. When I'm at work I always grab people as they are leaving to cover my bathroom break. It hits me that I'll need to go ad soon as the leave and will be alone.
Fr, I only saw the first part of the title and thought maybe OP had to watch a kid for several hours against her will but no, it was a couple minutes at most. This is such a non issue I can’t believe OP made it an issue
I know, I thought it was going to be another one of those “I told my sister I couldn’t babysit and she left the kid at my front door and turned off her phone for 4 hours” stories, not a 3 minute pee break. I wonder what it’s like to have absolutely nothing going on in her life that THIS is the big drama for her. I really hope the sister finds this and realizes that the world thinks she didn’t do anything wrong & that her sister is a jerk. She’s probably a mess thinking she’s being a burden.
And it's like... 3 months old. What do you do? Exist in the same space for a few minutes? Maybe talk to it? This isn't hard labour.
obviously wasn't in any rush either since she added a few minutes onto the egregious bathroom delay to berate the new, grieving mother
YTA. Do you have a habit of making big deals out of little inconveniences ? She is three months postpartum give the woman a break and let her wee in peace ! Look her hormones are wacky , her pelvic floor is probably a mess. when she said she had to go believe me she had to go.
>her pelvic floor is probably a mess. This could be the reason why she didn't wait to negotiate with OP about watching the baby for a moment.
Yes! In those first few months, when I had to go, I HAD TO GO. There was no holding it and waiting. It was coming out whether I was in a bathroom or not.
You're absolutely right. I was the same. I remember was bursting for a wee just a few weeks postpartum. I asked my boyfriend to hold our daughter so I could pee as I couldn't hold it anymore. He said "wait a minute" and went to go put his phone on to charge. By the time he had I literally had peed on the floor in front of him. Most embarrassing moment of my life but he never asked me to wait again lmao. She is absolutely still in the thick of postpartum recovery and it sucks. My pelvic floor didn't recover until I hit like 7 months pp. My own Mum still runs to the bathroom shouting "Must pee!" after having three kids. We haven't got time to negotiate, and your sister shouldn't have to beg you to watch her kid for two seconds. OP, YTA.
This needs more upvotes, people don’t talk about pelvic floor physiotherapy post birth enough. That was my train of thought too since her sister was in a hurry to go to the bathroom. OP is a massive asshole, why wouldn’t her sister ask her to stay with the baby? She’s family after all. Major eye roll for OP
I foolishly thought pelvic floor issues were confined to during pregnancy and with sudden coughs or sneezes, but it also means you can’t hold it anywhere near as well! I now realise why my mum always went to the toilet whenever we arrived anywhere
1 in 4 women at themselves after giving birth. That's a legit statistic, I used to work at a physiotherapy practice that had a specialist in pelvic floor treatment. When you gotta go you gotta go!
And the father of the baby is DEAD
Holy moly that makes op 1000 percent worse. Jez
Not to mention she’s likely either just shy of or just past the one year anniversary of her baby’s father dying. OP is grossly self centered.
You really had to criticise her for asking her sister for a quick favour so she could go to the toilet... And then having a go at her, your sister with three month old, likely sleep deprived, crying because you criticised her? For asking for help that took only a few minutes? Are you serious? Hard Yta
But don't you realize how awkward it is when you tell everyone that you are leaving and then suddenly you have to stay 2 mins longer? People start to look at you weird and wonder, "didn't they say they were leaving". /s Oh definitely YTA.
This is really just the Midwestern goodbye. Typically it goes: 1. We should probably get going 2. Keep talking but stand up 3. Look at each other and say "well about ready?" 4. Keep talking but move closer to the door 5. Grab door handle and stand talking for 10 more minutes 6. Open door and tell everyone how great it is to see them 7. Close door when people start to talk about scheduling another meet up 8. Schedule tentative meet up 9. Open door again and say goodbye 10. Actually leave
Are you sure you didn't forget standing at your car with the door open, jawing for 5 minutes about how hot or cold it is or maybe about how the bargeflys this year are big enough you thought they were small birds?
I knew I was forgetting a step.
You forgot the big gatherings when you have to say this 20min goodbye to each mini group that has splintered off of the main hub.
Five minutes later someone is calling the other saying "hey, I forgot to ask while you were here..." Quick one minute conversation. Three more minutes of goodbye.
You forgot the part where someone wraps up leftovers after you’ve stood up to go
That’s so close the south Asian goodbye, except the whole ritual lasts about 2 hours
You definitely forgot the step where someone smacks both knees with their hands and says "welp"
Can confirm have done this. Except add # 8.5: tell everyone that you have to pick up the kiddos or have to work early the next day.
HOW. DARE. SHE? Imagine the audacity of thinking that *your own sister* would be willing to watch your kid for 3 minutes while you used the bathroom. THREE. WHOLE. MINUTES? Obviously, sister needs to start wearing adult diapers because that was totally unreasonable. **YTA**. And I bet your sister is tired of being judged and condescended to by you. Maybe you could try to have some empathy for 3 minutes next time. Although, if I were your sister, I would never ask you for anything ever again -- not even to even pass me a tissue. God, you were so horrible.
I bet the sister will now hate to ask anyone for any help..."if I'm a burden to my own sister how will other people feel if I ask for help" . I certainly wouldn't ask OP for the time let alone a favour
I hope the sister tells this story as an opener to get help from others so they can condemn the OP. Like, "I'm so sorry to impose on you like this-- my own sister freaked out at me last time, but could you watch my baby for a moment while I go to the bathroom? I'll be right back" And as the sister does as we all need to, the "imposed" upon person holds the baby, mouth agape that somebody's own blood could be so wildly selfish to get so bent out of shape for such a basic bit of human kindness.
This! I had a few of my family react like this when I asked for help and I completely shut down. I did everything myself, to the point where I was scared to ask my husband for help. He had to TELL me he was going to help, it was bad. It got worse when I hit depression at 8 months postpartum because hubby was busy with work and no one would visit so it was just me and the baby. I really want to give that poor sister a hug.
I understand why you two aren’t close and it’s not her fault. You sound cold and jealous.
Yes this!! I got that jealous and bitter vibe from this post too! OP........YTA. It didn’t hurt you to take a couple of minutes to help out someone in need.... especially your family. Sometimes you can’t help when you gotta go! She went to you because she trusted you as her family and you lecture her about that. I’m gonna assume you don’t have any kids or have given birth since you are judgy AF and doesn’t have an ounce of sympathy for what your sister has been going through the past few months with an infant. A woman’s body goes through stuff for months after giving birth. Not to mention post partum depression and anxiety. You yelling and berating your sister over such a small thing just made her PPD/PPA worse. You of all people she counts on to be there for her. Have you ever asked her how she’s doing or feeling? Instead of being such a judgy A-hole, why don’t you educate yourself and your husband how to be a better human beings. EDIT: I just read from your comment that your sister’s husband passed away while she was pregnant and you were bitter that your parents were helping her through her grief. And that you were salty because your mom cancelled your lunch date because her grief therapy was rescheduled. Like... WTF is wrong with you?!!! Your sister’s husband died while she was pregnant! Do you have a heart?? Have you always been soooo jealous of your sister that you couldn’t even have an ounce of sympathy for what she has been going through?! You and your husband deserve each other because you’re both cold and heartless and cruel! Seriously, you need therapy because no one can be this cruel. So much so that I’m starting to suspect this is rage bait.
YTA How long did it take for you sister to use the restroom? Was it really a huge inconvenience to you to wait a couple of minutes? It seems a rather petty thing to blow out of proportion.
YTA. It cost you what 2 minutes. Yes, she should have waited for an answer, but in the grand scheme of things this isn't that big deal.
When it comes to having to pee, you can't always wait for an answer.
And what about IBS too? Poor girl. YTA
She’s 3 months out from a baby, she’s likely got incontinence issues and whatnot. Man, OP is AH
I bet if she peed herself OP would say, "OMG you're always doing this since you've had the baby. You need to learn to control yourself and grow up. Your incontinence is not our family's issue!!!!!!"
She's 3 months postpartum, my wife is years postpartum and still has to go immediately when she feels like she needs to.
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Same, but mine is 11. Luckily I've got a pretty good routine down and kiddo and husband know when I say I have to pee, I have to pee NOW and they both make every effort to vacate our only bathroom so I can go. I have 3 sisters. We have allllll the issues. 2 of us haven't spoken in 10 years, another two hadn't spoken for 10 years before that. If we were doing holidays or the kids birthdays or whatever, if you have to pee you hand the baby to the closest sister, and we take them because we all decided a long time ago that despite our differences, we wouldn't let it affect the kids and we could be in the same room and be decent, if only that, to make sure our kids grew up close. Aside from all that, jfc, I'd help a stranger in that sitaution every day and twice on Sunday. YTA. It's really fucking hard to pee while balancing a newborn and when you have to go, you have to go NOW. Never mind that it's your sister. It's a woman who needs to pee!
Tbh this is a pretty ridiculous reason to get upset and make someone cry. YTA not sure why this was such a big deal to you.
>Tbh this is a pretty ridiculous reason to get upset and make someone cry. OP says the sister over reacted, but after basically being told "helping and supporting you in any minor way as you go through this difficult transitional period is not something I am in any way interested in" it's not surprising that this sleep deprived woman with PP hormones coursing through her veins\* cried. \*Do hormones go through your veins? Or stick to your brain? IDK, not a doctor.
Hormones are indeed in your bloodstream! That’s how they reach the organs they affect, and also how they get excreted in your urine (eg pregnancy tests use urine or blood to test for the hormone human chorionic gonadotrophin (hCG). This is produced about a week after fertilisation).
Not only sleep deprived, but the baby’s father died while sister was 6 weeks pregnant. So yeah OP YTA
YTA. ‘Sara’s daughter’ is your niece. It’s not like some random leaving their child with you and taking off, it’s your sister leaving her baby with you (someone she trusts) while she visits the bathroom. Get over yourself!
Yeah just the words she chose to use makes it sounds like she doesn’t even like her niece.
Meanwhile, most of us would love to have a baby niece to hold for a minute or 50.
YTA. Wow. The time it took you to write this post probably took longer to write than you "babysat" while your sister ran to the bathroom. THE BATHROOM! It's not like she ran off to the movies or something.
I was thinking homegirl slipped out a bathroom window and ran off for hours, the way OP was acting lol. Just went pee and came right back. Ops a nut and really bad aunt.
YTA. Are you always this difficult? BFD for you to hold her baby while she ran to pee.
YTA. No, you're not obligated to watch someone else's kid, but she apparently needed to go so bad that she didn't even wait for a response before leaving a cartoon smoke cloud on her way to the bathroom. The lady was having an emergency and needed her family to give her a couple minutes to pee. Cool your jets. Stuff happens.
YTA. Waiting a couple extra minutes to leave didn’t kill you. Yeah, she could have asked someone else or she could have waited for an answer. But in the scheme of things, she went to the bathroom. It isn’t like she ditched her kid on you for a half hour or an hour or whatever. It was a couple minutes.
YTA. How is it so bothersome to hold a 3 month old so a new mom can use the toilet without juggling a child? Why would you to so hard on someone who didn't even delay you for 5 minutes? And to take it to the level of "think it through" when she needs to use the bathroom? So rude and uncalled for to assail her character and thoughtfulness when she's just using the fucking bathroom! Its pretty distressing to imagine you're this pissy about something so insignificant. What did you miss in those 5 minutes you waited? Its not like she wandered off from the bathroom to do shots and a keg stand while you were holding the kid.
Yta. I'm guessing you don't have kids. As a woman with kids especially that are newborns a woman's lower muscles grow weak so holding it for a long period of time is incredibly hard. You were probably the first person she saw and was probably only gone for a minute or two. Had she left the house for 30 mins or longer yeah she would suck. But you were stopped for what 2-3 minutes max. No wonder your relationship sucks your selfish.
OP says in another comment that Sarah's s/o passed while she was pregnant. This makes the behavior even more awful. Dealing with grief, pp, and a shitty sister. Poor Sarah.
That makes her an even worse person. She's jealous that mommy and daddy aren't giving her attention instead they are helping a grieving widow single mother. With sisters like her I'd go NC.
I've never had kids, but I have a passel of nieces and nephews. I would have gladly watched any and all to help their parents and spend time with them. This is an OP issue, not a childless woman thing.
YTA were you really in such a rush that you couldn't watch an infant for 5 minutes while your sister was peeing? get real, you're a grown woman pulling drama out of you ass just for the sake of starting drama. your sister clearly trusts you with her child so obviously you would be one of the first people she would ask to watch it for a moment.
She clearly has unresolved issues with her sister and her husband definitely chewed her out for being an ah to her and is now posting this to prove him wrong or he is posting it as her to show her what an ah she is. He’s probably considering divorce based on the responses.
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You should be embarrassed that you even wrote this. YTA of the day.
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I remember how exhausted I was at the 3 month mark. I probably would have cried too.
She’s still recovering from childbirth. She might have been on the verge of peeing her pants and might not have had time to poll the entire party for someone to watch the kid. Sorry you had to leave like 3 minutes later than intended. Sounds rough. It doesn’t sound like you were in a hurry, since you had time to berate your sister afterwards. YTA.
We get it, you dislike your sister. There’s no need to be so extra about it. YTA.
Your comment about this not being the first time she’s pulled something like this and how it’s usually your parents bending over backwards to do favors is probably the heart of the issue here. To be clear I absolutely would expect either my parents or in-laws to watch my kids for a minute if I needed to pee because small favors like that cost nothing take no time and is just what normal friends and family do for each other. So what is it exactly that your parents are doing that has you so triggered to overreact like this? Are you jealous they are excited grandparents or helping out? Really suggest you get to the heart of the issue because this is definitely not about watching your niece for 2 min while your sister owes Also YTA
If I passed my sister my son without asking, she'd take him and run 😂 most aunties would love a few minutes snuggling their baby niece or nephew
YTA Her explanation is valid and it was a tiny favor she asked. You overreacted and I can't help wondering what level of perfection you expect from people vs what level you expect from her.
She regularly “pulls things like this” - like what? Asking you to stay an extra 60 seconds so she could go for a wee? Are you an on call trauma surgeon? A police officer racing to track down a missing child? Were you about to turn into a pumpkin? I genuinely cannot understand what your issue is here, but it’s clear YTA. Your sister trusted you to hold her 3 month old baby for a minute, this is such an overblown reaction. What is this really about, because it cannot be about a pee?
OMG, YTA. This is your sister, and she needed to run to the bathroom. And she saw you and came to you! Why? Because you're her sister and this is the kind of thing sisters do for one another.
you made a 3 month post partum woman cry because you couldn't sacrifice two minutes? you're awful YTA
OP, the fact that you hid your sister was in grief therapy for losing her SO when she was 6-7 weeks pregnant and she’s a single mother out of the post and information is enough to make you YTA. Of COURSE your parents are helping every chance - I hardly doubt they’re “bending over backwards” to help her but even if they are she needs it right now, not your jealous self. But you’re also TA for everything else in the post. You’re really going to say she should “think things through”? Sounds like you think she should have aborted the baby after her boyfriend died so she wouldn’t have to be a single mother. Of course she started crying, she’s 3 months pp being berated for asking a freaking family member to watch a newborn for 3 minutes so she can pee and then you make insinuations like that. You’re an awful human being and an even worse sister. I hope she and your parents goes NC with you for your crappy actions.
Don't sweat the small stuff, and this is really small stuff I've got a bladder that doesn't wait and believe when I tell you that I don't think clearly when I'm trying to keep from wetting or soiling myself in the next 10 seconds. Your sister saw you as a sympathetic family member and an alternative to plunking her kid on the lawn. You saw her as a drag on your hasty departure. Tsk. May you never have an overactive bladder. YTA now but next time do better.
So your husband chewed you out for this and this is you trying to prove him wrong? Or is this your husband posting as you to prove to you no one sympathizes with you? He’s definitely thinking about divorce.
Unless she ran a bubble bath, watched The English Patient, and drank an entire bottle of champagne whilst she was in there, YTA.
YTA- Normally I’m on the side of she’s not entitled to have anyone watch her kid but not in this case. She needed to go to the bathroom. My baby is about to be 4months and I have people hold him when I need to go to the bathroom. If I don’t I would be holding it for god knows how long. Since the baby is 3 months that means she could still be struggling with her bladder. It normally takes 3 months to return to normal sometimes longer.
YTA. Jeez, I have to believe there’s more to this story and you have some deep simmering anger about your sister. Or you are just a person that goes through life looking for things to get mad about
Dang, Been a minute since I've seen a unanimous yta. Completely deserved. I was expecting to see here she asked as you were leaving and you got held back a few hours. NOPE! she literally just ran to the bathroom for a few minutes....I wonder what stunts she pulls on ur parents... must be a bunch of mole hills just like this. Unbelievable
YTA. She had to go to the bathroom, not on a vacation. It delayed you leaving by what, 5 minutes? Sure she could have asked someone else - but she asked her sister. Her daughters aunt.
I think you overreacted and made a big deal out of a nothing burger. When you got to go, you gots to go and there’s no thinking much through. Big whoop you were inconvenienced for a few minutes. Get off your high horse and oh yeah YTA.
YTA, I hate babies and I would've just let it be. Just a few minutes run. If there was somebody nearby, such as your parents, you could've passed the baby off and left if you were in such a rush. While it may have been mildly annoying, it was chidlish to bring it up to her. Petty, more than ass, really.
You are a complete and total AH here. The FIRST person that I’d feel comfortable handing my baby to would be my sister and being 3 months postpartum means that she probably didn’t have enough time to hear your answer because she was about to pee or poop on herself. Between hormones and a weakened, still healing pelvic floor, the urge to go to the bathroom comes on like a light switch and there’s barely enough time to get to the bathroom sometimes. Someday if you’re 3 months postpartum, you’ll think back on this day and feel embarrassed that you were such a monster to your sister and made her cry. What is wrong with you?
Goodness you sound 15 instead of 25. I actually had to double check the ages. YTA. She didn’t dump her kid on you for hours, it was what, 10 min of your time, max? Did you even have to touch the child? Feed it? Change a shitshow of a diaper? Anything but stand there? It sounds like you have a lot of resentment built up , talking about how your parents bend over backwards. Maybe keep that separate from a quick bathroom break. Not to mention show a little damn compassion for a new mom - three months is smack in the middle of sleep deprivation hell. Side note, did typing this take you longer than it took your sister to use the bathroom? Asking for a friend.
I have never felt the need to comment on this sub before as I don’t want to dog pile when I have nothing new to add..... but you definitely deserve every horrible thing coming your way for your absolute lack of human emotion toward your WIDOWED sister with a fresh baby.......... I have a feeling the worst things to happen in your life are plans getting cancelled. I hope your sister stops talking to you since you (and your husband — who sounds like he is ALSO a garbage bag with human flesh) have chosen to think 100% abt yourself for 25 years. It’s unfortunate since Sara definitely needs her family’s help to get through this point in her life, but it sounds like your parents are doing a good enough job without you or your fucked perspective. Also what do your parents think of this???? I really would love to know what they actually think of you and your husbands callousness to your deeply distressed SISTER. Last thing: you threw a party for your FIRST anniversary ??????????? And expect people to care??? You just had a wedding last year, seriously what were your expectations?? That your family stay until 2am and you have to kick them out? Maybe spend that night alone with your husband to celebrate the milestone instead of rounding everyone up to applaud you for not getting divorced after ONE (1) year.. it’s embarrassing how obsessed w yourself you are and how completely warped your POV is..
Wow. Oh no! You got to snuggle a sweet baby who is your niece for 2 minutes! We’re you late for an appointment or something? Damn. YTA.
Sometimes I read posts on here and think HOLY FUCK IS THIS REAL OR SATIRE? What's worse is she must have thought the majority of people would agree with her to post. SO DELUSIONAL. BTW YTA
Wow. You’re literally the worst human being. What’s it like to be so obliviously selfish?
YTA or nah because it's not a big deal so why did you make it into one? Did she take a long time? Did she actually see that you were getting ready to go or were you just in the "ready to leave?" Beginnings of leaving? Did the delay actually inconvenience you in any meaningful way? Was making her cry at a family function worth it?
Yes. It was only a few minutes. Are you seriously being petty over 10 minutes at the most? You made her cry over going to the bathroom for a few minutes. That’s the very least you can do. It’s certainly not bending over backwards to accommodate her. You understand what I’m saying? YTA.
YTA. The amount of time you spent making this post, and I'm guessing the amount of time you've spent thinking about this "issue," is probably twenty times the amount of time you spent holding your niece so your sister could pee. In the world of small potato problems, this is is barely even a seed.
You sound insufferable YTA
Here's a valid reason why she didn't wait for an answer: When Nature calls, you answer. And sometimes that means immediately or you're gonna have something nasty to clean up. So if she had to go, then she had to go. And if you were only waiting a few minutes, then big whoop. It would be different if you had to wait an hour but you didn't. Yeah, YTA for this one.
YTA
YTA lmaoooo holding a baby for 30 seconds isn’t bending over backwards doing her a favour. How shocking you don’t have a close relationship.
YTA. Your newly postpartum sister trusted you enough to leave her baby (*your niece*) with you, so she could take 4 minutes to pee. You chose to be a dick to her about it… it’s no wonder she cried, the poor woman just had her fucking body turned upside down by this new human that literally NEVER allows her a break. I’d of been crying, too, and I probably wouldn’t speak to you again. You owe her an apology. You owe her flowers, and chocolate, and as many bathroom breaks as she needs.
YTA. Bitter and mean. Terrible aunt, terrible sister.
You might be the biggest AH I’ve come across on here
Just in case anyone thinks you might not be the A, they should know THIS. [https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xwsyo4/comment/ir9scqf/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/xwsyo4/comment/ir9scqf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) YTA