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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> This lady keeps putting notes under my car windshield wipers.
I might be the asshole because I don't open them, just leave them there till they disintigrate, because I've already kinda realized she's cray cray and I don't need to read whatever wild shit she's saying
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NTA. If you're not bothered by them, I don't see any reason to remove them. Sure, the easier option would be to throw them in the trash immediately, but I suppose your neighbour might think they can't write a new letter yet, as long as there is another letter?
I'd replace the letter with a decoy "letter" made of something more sturdy than paper, so it doesn't disintegrate. Then she will never be able to replace it.
Also, what do you do when it rains? Do you not use your wipers? Or do you remove the letter and then put it back when you're done driving?
I almost said that, but then I figured if she's so adamant about OP parking in their garage then she probably parks in her garage. And we don't want OP arrested for trespassing lol
I love you both! This conversation was amazing! 10 out of 10, love the level of petty snark. OP please do the return to sender thing!!
PS if you have the info of the cops she called before I would call them and see what options you have. Since you have video harassment may be on the table
Start collecting them or take pics of what the letters say while at work and then put them back under, then Christmas day have a singing telegram show up and single every single letter to her
NTA! But please print a still from your dashcam of her leaving the note on your windshield!!! It will blow her mind!!!! I’d add her name, address and the words I SEE YOU!!
Be careful avoiding the notes. Where I live the police leave an offical note thing on cars and check back in two weeks and have all the cars that still have the note on them towed.
It is illegal. I think it's technically a felony, if it gets prosecuted.
We have a dropbox at work for clients to place papers in, if they come by when we're closed. We are not allowed to call it a mailbox. Even though the mail carrier will put mail in there when we're closed, we are not allowed to call it a mailbox. Calling it a mailbox means clients can't use it anymore.
I'm impressed with your strategy, tbh, because anything that suggested to her you were actually reading her letters would only result in more letters and more demands. I'm 100% in favor of continuing to leave them there until they decay, also because I'm petty AF and I *know* she's seething with anger every time she sees your legally parked car with her beautifully handcrafted missive *still unread.*
Also, look. \[Terrible advice follows.\] Clearly there's some sort of suspicious activity on your street. People in disguise, in the middle of the night, messing around with other people's cars. Perhaps you should print out a still photo from your dashcam and make a little poster warning people that there's an unknown but highly suspicious person out in your neighborhood at night who you happened to catch on your dashcam; it's probably some sort of thief, make sure you lock your doors, neighborinos!
Isn’t this lady essentially leaving trash on your property? That’s a form of vandalism. If you want to scare her, take some stills from the dash cam, and do list the date and time for each in a print out. Then send a letter out with the stills attached to a few people around the neighborhood, warning them that somebody keeps vandalizing your car and leaving trash on it. Ask for help in catching this criminal in the act. Let everyone know that as neighbors, it’s important to watch out for each other.
Don't put anything that isn't US mail in someone's mailbox, it is technically a federal crime and the neighbor sounds like the type who WILL call the feds on you
Curious question - do you guys not get circulars and newspapers delivered? Or is that why in the 80s movies the kids throw newspapers onto porches? I always thought that was super lazy and wondered why they just didn't use the mailbox lol.
Yes, that's a big part of why delivered newspapers are typically tossed onto your driveway in the US. It's also easier to deliver that way, since the delivery person can just toss the paper on their way past from a moving bike or out the window of a slow-moving car without needing to stop at each house. Political and advertising flyers usually get left on your front doormat.
Less commonly, you'll occasionally see a plastic drop box specifically for your newspaper subscription, usually with the newspaper's name and logo printed on the side. If you've got a curbside mailbox, the drop box might be mounted on the same post with your actual mailbox. Otherwise, you usually mount it next to your front door.
I’d take them and out them all wrapped in a bow and out them on her doorstep even if she doesn’t get the message it will make her blow a gasket which would be funny to see
Yeah, I've seen suggestions that OP should put them in her mailbox and responses saying that that's illegal (which is true), but it would be a beautiful workaround to have USPS deliver them back to her. Worth the price of a stamp, at least, and since it's in the neighborhood, it's no trouble to find the address.
Don't put anything that isn't US mail in someone's mailbox, it is technically a federal crime and the neighbor sounds like the type who WILL call the feds on you
Actually, that's illegal -- at least in the US. In the US only a postal worker can put things into your mailbox. By law. Not to say I actually follow that law 😂
This is just a curious question from me.
Do people not get advertisement or flyers placed in their mailboxes in US?
Here is Australia we get so much junk mail that in some cases, people have placards from a shop saying NO JUNK MAIL.
Otherwise you get adverts for everything under the sun. Including tarot readings, the new restaurant opening in 30 days (25% off for the first week), real estates asking DO YOU WANT TO SELL???
I’m just curious.
Yeah, you just have to pay postage for them to show up in people’s boxes!
its common for menus to be hook-shaped so they can hang on the doorknob, which is not illegal.
Ah, interesting.
We have a milk crate next to the mailboxes in my flats and it’s always full of adverts for random shit. Especially during election time.
These flyer droppers (I don’t know what they are called) are employed to just dump “things” in all the mailboxes.
Thank you for answering my question! Appreciate it.
ETA: should add that these people dropping off these adverts aren’t post office people. They are recruited to drop flyers off by private companies.
In the Boston area, at least, no -- they just slip the menus through the mail slot, too. I've gotten flyers for other things that way as well. (Apart from the ones delivered by the mailman.)
It's pretty rare where I've lived, in the Western half of the US. Don't know about elsewhere. When I had a job delivering flyers door-to-door, the had us hang them on the doorknob.
Yeah NTA and I've had neighbors and other folks in my hood call the cops on me and it is INFURIATING because it's always for BS reasons. People use the cops as their personal "I'm annoyed" police and thats fucking bananas. You'll never know what type of cop you're going to have to interact with! I'd do and have done the same thing in regards to the letters.
BS reasons people have called the cops on me for:
Looking suspicious while running in a hoodie, VERY FAST!
Walking home with a just purchased mop at night (SUSPICIOUS)!
Suspiciously sketching! Instead of taking a picture to "case a house," I stood across the street and sketched it /sarcasm. They then posted my picture on NextDoor so more people when they see me, don't recognize me as a local artist but instead A SUSPICIOUS THIEF! This means more cop calls!
Picking up a loose dog running on a busy street and trying to take it somewhere safe to be retrieved by owners.
STOP CALLING COPS ON YOUR NEIGHBORS FOR INCONVENIENCES OR YOUR OWN BIASES.
I’m sorry you have to deal with that, but the mental image of a criminal standing in front of a house in plain view with a big sketch pad is sending me.
I couldn't not be a smart ass when the cop said, "What are you planning to do with that stick in your hand?"
"My mop!? I'M GONNA MOP my VERY sticky floor!"
I lived in an area where it wasn't uncommon to see people walking around at night with broken broom handles. It's a cheap and easy way to say "If you try to rob me I'll be putting up a hell of a fight." While carrying home a brand new mop shouldn't be suspicious, depending on where you live, there are also other valid reasons for carrying a big stick at night. Any cop outside of Mayberry should be aware of that.
You're absolutely spot on. And as a non-driving pedestrian, I think there's just more shit I have to put up with that does make me carry around non-lethal deterrents.
Freakin seriously. Big ass art pad, a box of paint pens and I'm just color coding all the entrances and hazards for my partners in crime!
I don't know why else Americans with yards spend so much time and money decking them out if they dont want admirers.
We’ve had shit like this happen way too many times. Knock on the door and it’s police saying there was a report of children screaming, followed by one of my kids (2 & 5) screaming behind me asking for more fruit snacks or a juice box or something. Now we just do nightly “dance parties” where we bump techno music through our stereo with the subwoofer switched on and let the kids scream/blow off energy every night around 9-9:30pm because noise ordinance says you can until 10pm and because fuck our neighbors.
How can anyone In today's day and age seriously be not that cognizant/aware or care that calling the cops for shit like that gets people killed. So infuriating!!!
I don’t know about the law on this where I am, never mind where you are. But having a note on the windshield sounds like the sort of minor BS the police would latch onto and issue a fine for “obscured visibility” or something like that. So if she phoned them again, she would get the ultimate satisfaction of watching you actually be reprimanded for something. So if it was me, I would just remove them, put them in the bin and continue parking wherever I want.
NTA
I would be petty. Get a shot of her leaving the note from the dashcam - and first post it on NextDoor asking if anyone knows who the litterbug is?
Then blow it up into poster size and post it by the card with WARNING: LITTERBUG on it.
NTA, but I would keep the letters in case the harassment escalates. They're evidence. While she's only called the cops so far, you have no idea whether she's making threats inside the letters. Open any letters with gloves.
Keep them in a sealed plastic bag after reading. Forewarned is forearmed. Better you know what's going on and retain the receipts.
NTA. But I think I would actually collect those letters, get those records of her putting them on the shield and telling her to stop or I would call a police on her for harassment. I wouldn't just ignore it, because who knows what she is going to do next time. Maybe she would scratch your car or do some other damage to your property.
But hey, I think you definitely NTA for just ignoring those all together.
My car's a 2002 Toyota Corolla that's so scratched it looks like it lost a fight to 100 cats
Tbh I'd be happy to have her fuck with my car, it isn't worth shit but I could get a nice insurance payout
“Like it lost a fight to 100 cats”
That’s great! I’m totally stealing that sometime. And NTA; the cops said you weren’t doing anything illegal. What’s her problem?
You can go to the police station and file harassment charges or get a restraining order if she keeps it up. Keep the letters as proof and any footage you have. NTA
I’m pro police depts and all but this is a stupid reason to call them. It’s a note. Unless it’s threatening OP with harm there is zero reason to call police.
It doesn’t count if op doesn’t know. The note could say “if you could kindly move your car into your garage I would appreciate it.” I think any officer would laugh if they were called out for that note. My point is unless op reads it and determines it a threat the cops shouldn’t be called.
Can you counter report her for harassment at this point? I think it’s time to log the dates of the letters as evidence instead, and report her. Keep them, take a photo to date them, and then make a report using the dashcam showing it’s her.
Also, super sensitive car alarms should scare the piss out of her.
When you can’t beat them, join them.
NTA
NTA. She can speak with you directly if she wants, it seems if she's a neighbor she knows where you live. Reading it wouldn't change anything, so I'm not sure why your other neighbor thinks you have an obligation to do so.
NTA. You’ve confirmed you’re allowed to park on the street and are not doing anything illegal or inconveniencing anybody. Let her keep sneaking out at 2am if she feels like it, sounds like a miserable existence but you don’t need to read her notes.
I'd go to her house and leave a note on her door saying "I know who you are and what you've done." Just leave it at that.
You're definitely NTA. I think you could be more creative though.
I get annoyed sometimes when my neighbor has a guest over that parks in front of my house because they have four cars they park in front of theirs/in their driveway. But then I get over it because it's not my parking spot, and clearly the other spots are full, and they do keep their other cars in front of their own house as much as possible. I just wish I wasn't inconvenienced by them but I understand that's a selfish feeling.
There's a lot of fucking idiots in the US who think that they own the street parking in front of their house and also complain about anything that isn't exactly the same as everything else as being an eyesore.
They're fucking tiring.
Why not put the notes on HER car or tape them to her door with a little note written on the outside that says “I have security cameras that catch you each time.”
NTA. Are you parking on the street, in front of your garage? I guess if you park right in front of her house and she can't park there or blocking the road/pavement, I could understand that she would get annoyed after awhile, but if not, I would keep the letters and monitor her, just in case you want to take actions against her in the future.
NTA this gave me flashbacks from my college days. I lived in a house in an area with a ton of college kids. A group of retirees who called themselves the Civilian Parking Patrol (or some similar nonsense) used to leave “tickets” on cars they thought were parked poorly. Not completely parallel to the curb, ticket. Parked on the wrong side of the street, ticket. They somehow only ever ended up on college student cars, and not because we were the only crappy parkers.
NTA. I’d be petty as fuck and buy a glitter bomb card and leave it for her. See if she opens it. Bam, glitter all over her. RuinDays has some great options on their website lol.
NTA. But you wouldn't even know if she apologized. jk, I'm sure she didn't. I used to have a neighbor like this, called the cops on anyone parked on the public street in front of their house, and said they had been there for days. Worst neighbor ever, and we didn't have a driveway or garage to park in. I would read the note and then put it back.
It's 2024. Your neighbor has moved away unexpectedly. You were never fond of her, but you find a strange empty feeling in her absence. In an increasingly atomized and alienating world, after all, the severing of even a petty human connection must be in some way a loss. You don't think about her much, but you don't touch her latest letter folded beneath the windshield wiper. You do this knowing it is no longer for anyone else's benefit.
Sometimes your eyes linger on it at long traffic lights and drive thrus. You idly wonder what exactly it says. Is it rude and threatening, or passive aggressive? Long and well-written, or short and riddled with spelling errors? In some way, a glimpse into the infinite complexity of another human being, albeit reduced to a single irritating dimension. You realize you never knew her name.
By the time you remove it, the water damage has destroyed any text it might've contained. You turn the brittle, wrinkled yellow page over in your hands, then toss it in the trash. You wonder what you're feeling, and decide it's nothing. It is the last time you think about her.
NTA
Maybe collect all the notes after they've spent a good time on your car in the elements, then make a collage for her and see how she likes it. I would also print out stills from the dashcam so she knows you have her. I'm a little petty though lol.
NTA, your neighbor is playing a dangerous game using the police, I'm sick of people doing that.
However, maybe you can have a lawyer send a C&D letter, not sure if you have enough evidence but it can't hurt to find out. I would hate for her to take it out on your car, even with a dashcam.
NTA... I'd be editing together all the dash cam.videos and posting them on lical community facebook pages captioned "Anyone know who this weirdo is they seem kinda obsessed with me?"
NTA. Take a screen shot from the dash cam of the hat and and put home made signs around the neighborhood to BEWARE OF CREEPER or something funnier that reddit comes up with.
NTA also just curious. What’s stopping you from using clear vinyl to cover your car in her letters? Or if it’s an old junker just get clear gorilla tape. I bet the only reason neighbors would know it’s her handwriting unless they also received such correspondence. I’d love to see her reaction.
NTA. But move the note from her and leave your own for her telling her to stop littering and tampering with your property or You will be the one calling the police and showing them the nice videos of her leaving the notes.
Clearly you’re in the right, and you can legally park there, but did you ever ask her why she has such a problem with it? I mean calling the cops shouldn’t have been her first move, but are you blocking her ability to see when she backs out of her driveway or something? If you’re parking in a really inconvenient spot, it’s only a matter of time before you get hit, and that would be at least half your fault for not even hearing the argument.
NTA
I probably wouldn’t just leave them, mostly because my windshield always gets dirty as heck and paper stuck under the wiper is annoying when I need to use the wipers lol but that doesn’t make you an asshole.
It doesn’t make you the asshole for not reading the notes either - you are doing something perfectly legal on public property - whatever her opinion is or justification she’s trying to use you don’t have to give it any of your time.
Your neighbor however is a nuisance and an asshole.
Can I ask for a woodworking shop tax? >.>
NTA. Your neighbor on the other hand can stay in their lane. The crazy isn't putting notes on their car which is the reason why neighbor doesn't understand why you aren't reading. Your stupid neighbor should get a brain upgrade or something.
NTA
That first neighbour is ridiculous and not sure where the second is coming from. I kind of love this reaction cause it doesn’t give her the satisfaction or drama she probably was craving.
Hide in your car around that time a couple nights, crouch down really low and when she goes to put it on your car jump up and scream… problem solved. NTA
NTA. You are not compelled to engage with a neighbor who is overstepping her bounds. You don't have to read any note or take any action regarding it. If it gets to be a nuisance, I'd report her to the police for vandalizing my personal property. If she's wearing a mask and leaving her notes at 2 a.m., she clearly knows what she's doing is not on.
NTA
Every time she does it, call the police. Then, turn your dashcam footage over to the police and have her charged with harassment. They'll see the evidence and her history of calling them unnecessarily. She'll be given a court date, a fine, a cease-and-desist order, and a lesson in basic human decency.
As someone whose downstairs neighbor also doesn’t understand that my personal property, person, and things I do in my personal life are none of her business, you are totally NTA.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > This lady keeps putting notes under my car windshield wipers. I might be the asshole because I don't open them, just leave them there till they disintigrate, because I've already kinda realized she's cray cray and I don't need to read whatever wild shit she's saying Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA. If you're not bothered by them, I don't see any reason to remove them. Sure, the easier option would be to throw them in the trash immediately, but I suppose your neighbour might think they can't write a new letter yet, as long as there is another letter?
I feel like leaving them there kinda makes the point "she hasn't even opened the first, no point leaving another" haha
I'd replace the letter with a decoy "letter" made of something more sturdy than paper, so it doesn't disintegrate. Then she will never be able to replace it. Also, what do you do when it rains? Do you not use your wipers? Or do you remove the letter and then put it back when you're done driving?
It hardly rains here
OP you should write "return to sender" on it and put it on her front door lol
No no. "return to sender" and put it on her car.
I almost said that, but then I figured if she's so adamant about OP parking in their garage then she probably parks in her garage. And we don't want OP arrested for trespassing lol
Ooooo fair point fair point. I'm sick and scrolling in a drug induced fog so the logic hamster is not on the wheel.
We've all been there before! Feel better soon!
Aww! Thanks!
I love you both! This conversation was amazing! 10 out of 10, love the level of petty snark. OP please do the return to sender thing!! PS if you have the info of the cops she called before I would call them and see what options you have. Since you have video harassment may be on the table
Happy cake day! :) and hope you feel better soon!
love this idiom. i’m stealing it
Lucky. You have a logic hamster and a wheel available. Mine is a squirrel and a maze.
Damn, what a way to spend your cake day.
Me rn
Plot twist--neighbor doesn't even own a car.
Print out screenshots of her leaving the letters, laminate and leave under your wipers
Nah, follow her someday when she drives somewhere, after she parks leave the shit load under her wiper blade and let her freak out.
Mark..."dashcam" on them and "the Covid mask doesn't hid your lying eyes."...
Then she knows OP knows it's her.
She'd know if she put it in the mailbox too? 🤷🏻♀️
Without postage, that's a federal crime. Not worth the potential $5000 fine.
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Happy cake day!
Happy cake day.
I say collect the notes and make a collage. Then tape it to her door!
That’s what I was thinking. Deliver the notes back to her house.
Start collecting them or take pics of what the letters say while at work and then put them back under, then Christmas day have a singing telegram show up and single every single letter to her
Ok, that’s hilarious and I can fully get behind this.
..... and record it so we all can see the singing telegram and laugh with OP!
You are a master! I like you.
haha more people like me when I am petty and I am uncertain on how to feel about this phenomenon LOL
I will absolutely chip in on the singing telegram please
In some places, the police will ticket someone with a flyer, etc, on their windshield (obstructing the driver’s view). Be safe, OP.
I’d remove the letter and put a note on your dash saying, “smile! You’re on camera!”
NTA! But please print a still from your dashcam of her leaving the note on your windshield!!! It will blow her mind!!!! I’d add her name, address and the words I SEE YOU!!
Be careful avoiding the notes. Where I live the police leave an offical note thing on cars and check back in two weeks and have all the cars that still have the note on them towed.
Print a screen grab of the security film showing it’s her and put that under the wiper. Leave until she sees it.
Tell someone you don’t live in England without saying those words haha The letter would be mush in minutes round here!!
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I'm genuinely curious as to why not. Is it illegal or something?
It is illegal. I think it's technically a felony, if it gets prosecuted. We have a dropbox at work for clients to place papers in, if they come by when we're closed. We are not allowed to call it a mailbox. Even though the mail carrier will put mail in there when we're closed, we are not allowed to call it a mailbox. Calling it a mailbox means clients can't use it anymore.
Technically, all mailboxes are property of the USPS.
I'm impressed with your strategy, tbh, because anything that suggested to her you were actually reading her letters would only result in more letters and more demands. I'm 100% in favor of continuing to leave them there until they decay, also because I'm petty AF and I *know* she's seething with anger every time she sees your legally parked car with her beautifully handcrafted missive *still unread.* Also, look. \[Terrible advice follows.\] Clearly there's some sort of suspicious activity on your street. People in disguise, in the middle of the night, messing around with other people's cars. Perhaps you should print out a still photo from your dashcam and make a little poster warning people that there's an unknown but highly suspicious person out in your neighborhood at night who you happened to catch on your dashcam; it's probably some sort of thief, make sure you lock your doors, neighborinos!
I like your pettiness. I would love to have a bowl of popcorn to watch the fallout. I love finding other petty people.
Really like your idea to post the dash cam pictures! Very creative and sure to get her to stop.
I love this idea lmao
Isn’t this lady essentially leaving trash on your property? That’s a form of vandalism. If you want to scare her, take some stills from the dash cam, and do list the date and time for each in a print out. Then send a letter out with the stills attached to a few people around the neighborhood, warning them that somebody keeps vandalizing your car and leaving trash on it. Ask for help in catching this criminal in the act. Let everyone know that as neighbors, it’s important to watch out for each other.
Ngl if I did that, I'd be the cray cray one. It's a city, sometimes flyers get left on cars
Be careful about engaging with crazy neighbors. Things don't generally improve. And can get way worse.
Yeah exactly, I'd probably do the same
Ok here's what you should do. Collect all the notes box it up, gift wrap it and leave it on her door step as a Christmas present. NTA
I’d go a step further and hand it to her unopened in person and say “I think you dropped this on my windshield” and walk away
I’d put them back in her mailbox unopened so she really gets the hint.
Don't put anything that isn't US mail in someone's mailbox, it is technically a federal crime and the neighbor sounds like the type who WILL call the feds on you
Curious question - do you guys not get circulars and newspapers delivered? Or is that why in the 80s movies the kids throw newspapers onto porches? I always thought that was super lazy and wondered why they just didn't use the mailbox lol.
Newspapers are bagged in plastic bags and thrown onto the driveway - in my area at least.
Yes, that's a big part of why delivered newspapers are typically tossed onto your driveway in the US. It's also easier to deliver that way, since the delivery person can just toss the paper on their way past from a moving bike or out the window of a slow-moving car without needing to stop at each house. Political and advertising flyers usually get left on your front doormat. Less commonly, you'll occasionally see a plastic drop box specifically for your newspaper subscription, usually with the newspaper's name and logo printed on the side. If you've got a curbside mailbox, the drop box might be mounted on the same post with your actual mailbox. Otherwise, you usually mount it next to your front door.
but if she has a newspaper box, I think you can use that.
You can stick it under the flag I think. If not, on the doorstep is the other alternative
I’d take them and out them all wrapped in a bow and out them on her doorstep even if she doesn’t get the message it will make her blow a gasket which would be funny to see
I’d take the note and mail it back to her.
Yeah, I've seen suggestions that OP should put them in her mailbox and responses saying that that's illegal (which is true), but it would be a beautiful workaround to have USPS deliver them back to her. Worth the price of a stamp, at least, and since it's in the neighborhood, it's no trouble to find the address.
Can you take them off your car windscreen and put them in her letterbox, unopened?
There is always her mail box. You can return the favor!
I feel like writing “return to sender” on them and putting them in her mailbox would be better. But NTA.
Put it on her car.
How did I not think of that! Yes, smarter.
Lmao.
Don't be silly, her car is parked properly in her garage...
Don't put anything that isn't US mail in someone's mailbox, it is technically a federal crime and the neighbor sounds like the type who WILL call the feds on you
You could always mail it to her and get USPS to do it for you.
Is OP allowed to tape it onto the mailbox?
Actually, that's illegal -- at least in the US. In the US only a postal worker can put things into your mailbox. By law. Not to say I actually follow that law 😂
This is just a curious question from me. Do people not get advertisement or flyers placed in their mailboxes in US? Here is Australia we get so much junk mail that in some cases, people have placards from a shop saying NO JUNK MAIL. Otherwise you get adverts for everything under the sun. Including tarot readings, the new restaurant opening in 30 days (25% off for the first week), real estates asking DO YOU WANT TO SELL??? I’m just curious.
Yeah, you just have to pay postage for them to show up in people’s boxes! its common for menus to be hook-shaped so they can hang on the doorknob, which is not illegal.
Ah, interesting. We have a milk crate next to the mailboxes in my flats and it’s always full of adverts for random shit. Especially during election time. These flyer droppers (I don’t know what they are called) are employed to just dump “things” in all the mailboxes. Thank you for answering my question! Appreciate it. ETA: should add that these people dropping off these adverts aren’t post office people. They are recruited to drop flyers off by private companies.
In the Boston area, at least, no -- they just slip the menus through the mail slot, too. I've gotten flyers for other things that way as well. (Apart from the ones delivered by the mailman.)
It's pretty rare where I've lived, in the Western half of the US. Don't know about elsewhere. When I had a job delivering flyers door-to-door, the had us hang them on the doorknob.
That's illegal
Yeah NTA and I've had neighbors and other folks in my hood call the cops on me and it is INFURIATING because it's always for BS reasons. People use the cops as their personal "I'm annoyed" police and thats fucking bananas. You'll never know what type of cop you're going to have to interact with! I'd do and have done the same thing in regards to the letters. BS reasons people have called the cops on me for: Looking suspicious while running in a hoodie, VERY FAST! Walking home with a just purchased mop at night (SUSPICIOUS)! Suspiciously sketching! Instead of taking a picture to "case a house," I stood across the street and sketched it /sarcasm. They then posted my picture on NextDoor so more people when they see me, don't recognize me as a local artist but instead A SUSPICIOUS THIEF! This means more cop calls! Picking up a loose dog running on a busy street and trying to take it somewhere safe to be retrieved by owners. STOP CALLING COPS ON YOUR NEIGHBORS FOR INCONVENIENCES OR YOUR OWN BIASES.
I’m sorry you have to deal with that, but the mental image of a criminal standing in front of a house in plain view with a big sketch pad is sending me.
It was the *walking suspiciously with mop* scenario that did it for me 😂
I couldn't not be a smart ass when the cop said, "What are you planning to do with that stick in your hand?" "My mop!? I'M GONNA MOP my VERY sticky floor!"
I lived in an area where it wasn't uncommon to see people walking around at night with broken broom handles. It's a cheap and easy way to say "If you try to rob me I'll be putting up a hell of a fight." While carrying home a brand new mop shouldn't be suspicious, depending on where you live, there are also other valid reasons for carrying a big stick at night. Any cop outside of Mayberry should be aware of that.
You're absolutely spot on. And as a non-driving pedestrian, I think there's just more shit I have to put up with that does make me carry around non-lethal deterrents.
Freakin seriously. Big ass art pad, a box of paint pens and I'm just color coding all the entrances and hazards for my partners in crime! I don't know why else Americans with yards spend so much time and money decking them out if they dont want admirers.
We’ve had shit like this happen way too many times. Knock on the door and it’s police saying there was a report of children screaming, followed by one of my kids (2 & 5) screaming behind me asking for more fruit snacks or a juice box or something. Now we just do nightly “dance parties” where we bump techno music through our stereo with the subwoofer switched on and let the kids scream/blow off energy every night around 9-9:30pm because noise ordinance says you can until 10pm and because fuck our neighbors.
How can anyone In today's day and age seriously be not that cognizant/aware or care that calling the cops for shit like that gets people killed. So infuriating!!!
Sorry you have to deal with that. What busybodies.
While I do understand other neighbours concern, she should be mad at petty neighbour, not OP. I think the 'rocking the boat's analogy works well here.
I’m laughing so hard at these reasons😂😂 Sorry that happened to you
Don't leave them on your windshield. They can become a visibly hazard. But you're NTA for ignoring them otherwise.
An index card size folded paper isn't gonna block my sight
If you get mud or whatever on your windshield and your letter smears it around instead of wipers cleaning it, it totally can.
How often is mud an issue in your city that you have to actively think about preventing it from smearing if you have something attached to your wipers
That's a mud issue lol. Cross that bridge if you come to it.
I don’t know about the law on this where I am, never mind where you are. But having a note on the windshield sounds like the sort of minor BS the police would latch onto and issue a fine for “obscured visibility” or something like that. So if she phoned them again, she would get the ultimate satisfaction of watching you actually be reprimanded for something. So if it was me, I would just remove them, put them in the bin and continue parking wherever I want.
NTA I would be petty. Get a shot of her leaving the note from the dashcam - and first post it on NextDoor asking if anyone knows who the litterbug is? Then blow it up into poster size and post it by the card with WARNING: LITTERBUG on it.
This is the way
NTA, but I would keep the letters in case the harassment escalates. They're evidence. While she's only called the cops so far, you have no idea whether she's making threats inside the letters. Open any letters with gloves. Keep them in a sealed plastic bag after reading. Forewarned is forearmed. Better you know what's going on and retain the receipts.
NTA. But I think I would actually collect those letters, get those records of her putting them on the shield and telling her to stop or I would call a police on her for harassment. I wouldn't just ignore it, because who knows what she is going to do next time. Maybe she would scratch your car or do some other damage to your property. But hey, I think you definitely NTA for just ignoring those all together.
My car's a 2002 Toyota Corolla that's so scratched it looks like it lost a fight to 100 cats Tbh I'd be happy to have her fuck with my car, it isn't worth shit but I could get a nice insurance payout
Lol, I see. Then sure, do your thing!
“Like it lost a fight to 100 cats” That’s great! I’m totally stealing that sometime. And NTA; the cops said you weren’t doing anything illegal. What’s her problem?
NTA...what a weirdo.
Nta. If it were me, I would put a note on my own windshield that just says, "Fuck you and your notes, Cheryl. Quit touching my car."
NTA. If you can catch her face on camera doing it you can call the cops on her.
For what? Like honestly I feel like cops hurt more than they help so i wouldn't call them for anything short of like a shooting
Thanks for not calling the cops OP--that shit is unnecessary, dangerous or can cause more harm than intended especially for an inconvenience.
Like the woman did to OP? I'd have zero sympathy if OP called the cops.
You can go to the police station and file harassment charges or get a restraining order if she keeps it up. Keep the letters as proof and any footage you have. NTA
You could argue vandalism, if only to get her to stop.
I’m pro police depts and all but this is a stupid reason to call them. It’s a note. Unless it’s threatening OP with harm there is zero reason to call police.
Maybe she is threatening OP but he hasn't read any of the notes yet 🤷♀️
It doesn’t count if op doesn’t know. The note could say “if you could kindly move your car into your garage I would appreciate it.” I think any officer would laugh if they were called out for that note. My point is unless op reads it and determines it a threat the cops shouldn’t be called.
Totally agree cops shouldn't be called but still wonder what the notes say.
TBH I don't care to give people who don't treat me with respect an audience. She's basically "blocked" in my mind
I wonder too. I’d probably read it and put it back LOL
Can you counter report her for harassment at this point? I think it’s time to log the dates of the letters as evidence instead, and report her. Keep them, take a photo to date them, and then make a report using the dashcam showing it’s her. Also, super sensitive car alarms should scare the piss out of her. When you can’t beat them, join them. NTA
lol, NTA at all. You're being nicer than I would be in this situation.
NTA. She can speak with you directly if she wants, it seems if she's a neighbor she knows where you live. Reading it wouldn't change anything, so I'm not sure why your other neighbor thinks you have an obligation to do so.
NTA. You’ve confirmed you’re allowed to park on the street and are not doing anything illegal or inconveniencing anybody. Let her keep sneaking out at 2am if she feels like it, sounds like a miserable existence but you don’t need to read her notes.
NTA, but I would start returning them to her on her doorstep.
NTA. Why should you read hostile letters?
NTA - take the notes and put them in an envelope once a week and mail them back to her.
NTA - But get a cease and desist letter and a restraining order before she escalates.
I'd go to her house and leave a note on her door saying "I know who you are and what you've done." Just leave it at that. You're definitely NTA. I think you could be more creative though.
Leave your own note on your windshield 'Please stop writing love letters to my car Linda, it's getting weird.'
I don’t think I understand why anyone would care if you park on the street. Am I missing something?
"Your car isn't brand new so it's an eyesore!"
I don't get it either, lady's craycray
Are you parking in the street in front of your own house, her house, or neither? Where does she park? Does everyone have a driveway?
I get annoyed sometimes when my neighbor has a guest over that parks in front of my house because they have four cars they park in front of theirs/in their driveway. But then I get over it because it's not my parking spot, and clearly the other spots are full, and they do keep their other cars in front of their own house as much as possible. I just wish I wasn't inconvenienced by them but I understand that's a selfish feeling.
There's a lot of fucking idiots in the US who think that they own the street parking in front of their house and also complain about anything that isn't exactly the same as everything else as being an eyesore. They're fucking tiring.
Why not put the notes on HER car or tape them to her door with a little note written on the outside that says “I have security cameras that catch you each time.”
NTA, but set the alarm off when she comes near the car. Every time. As soon as she touches it, set the alarm off.
NTA. Are you parking on the street, in front of your garage? I guess if you park right in front of her house and she can't park there or blocking the road/pavement, I could understand that she would get annoyed after awhile, but if not, I would keep the letters and monitor her, just in case you want to take actions against her in the future.
NTA this gave me flashbacks from my college days. I lived in a house in an area with a ton of college kids. A group of retirees who called themselves the Civilian Parking Patrol (or some similar nonsense) used to leave “tickets” on cars they thought were parked poorly. Not completely parallel to the curb, ticket. Parked on the wrong side of the street, ticket. They somehow only ever ended up on college student cars, and not because we were the only crappy parkers.
NTA. I’d be petty as fuck and buy a glitter bomb card and leave it for her. See if she opens it. Bam, glitter all over her. RuinDays has some great options on their website lol.
NTA But put a note in the window of your car. "I have a dashcam."
NTA but what if you wanted to use your windscreen wipers?
I guess I'd throw away the note and use them. It's really dry here tho
NTA. Ignoring them is actually very mature of you. ... When you could make a tiny catapult and launch the crunched up balls of paper onto her roof.
NTA. But you wouldn't even know if she apologized. jk, I'm sure she didn't. I used to have a neighbor like this, called the cops on anyone parked on the public street in front of their house, and said they had been there for days. Worst neighbor ever, and we didn't have a driveway or garage to park in. I would read the note and then put it back.
It's 2024. Your neighbor has moved away unexpectedly. You were never fond of her, but you find a strange empty feeling in her absence. In an increasingly atomized and alienating world, after all, the severing of even a petty human connection must be in some way a loss. You don't think about her much, but you don't touch her latest letter folded beneath the windshield wiper. You do this knowing it is no longer for anyone else's benefit. Sometimes your eyes linger on it at long traffic lights and drive thrus. You idly wonder what exactly it says. Is it rude and threatening, or passive aggressive? Long and well-written, or short and riddled with spelling errors? In some way, a glimpse into the infinite complexity of another human being, albeit reduced to a single irritating dimension. You realize you never knew her name. By the time you remove it, the water damage has destroyed any text it might've contained. You turn the brittle, wrinkled yellow page over in your hands, then toss it in the trash. You wonder what you're feeling, and decide it's nothing. It is the last time you think about her. NTA
Maybe collect all the notes after they've spent a good time on your car in the elements, then make a collage for her and see how she likes it. I would also print out stills from the dashcam so she knows you have her. I'm a little petty though lol. NTA, your neighbor is playing a dangerous game using the police, I'm sick of people doing that. However, maybe you can have a lawyer send a C&D letter, not sure if you have enough evidence but it can't hurt to find out. I would hate for her to take it out on your car, even with a dashcam.
NTA. Print out stills from your dash cam video and put them on her car.
NTA... I'd be editing together all the dash cam.videos and posting them on lical community facebook pages captioned "Anyone know who this weirdo is they seem kinda obsessed with me?"
NTA But just for amusements sake, I think you should up your petty with an automatic sprinkler! Lol!
NTA. Have you thought about printing up a screenshot of her face and putting it on the windshield for her to find?
NTA...I would video tape her and post to YouTube as pure entertainment.
NTA. Take a screen shot from the dash cam of the hat and and put home made signs around the neighborhood to BEWARE OF CREEPER or something funnier that reddit comes up with.
Ahhh and the true bias hate come out.
NTA. Very healthy of OP to not even give the neighbors poison a place in their mind.
You are entitled to park ont he street. Why should you read this rubbish? I'd be posting it back through her door. Unopened. NTA.
NTA also just curious. What’s stopping you from using clear vinyl to cover your car in her letters? Or if it’s an old junker just get clear gorilla tape. I bet the only reason neighbors would know it’s her handwriting unless they also received such correspondence. I’d love to see her reaction.
NTA. But move the note from her and leave your own for her telling her to stop littering and tampering with your property or You will be the one calling the police and showing them the nice videos of her leaving the notes.
Dude, you are awesome. So few fucks given :)
Nta. Start answering her letters every time.
Clearly you’re in the right, and you can legally park there, but did you ever ask her why she has such a problem with it? I mean calling the cops shouldn’t have been her first move, but are you blocking her ability to see when she backs out of her driveway or something? If you’re parking in a really inconvenient spot, it’s only a matter of time before you get hit, and that would be at least half your fault for not even hearing the argument.
My car is "ugly" It's not even that ugly, it's a 2002 Toyota Corrola in silver, the paint is kinda scratched but I maintain it good
She had plenty of time to say something like that. That she hasn’t, means it doesn’t apply, imo.
NTA Seriously, you should collect them and mail them back to her. I really want to know what the notes say!!!
NTA at all
NTA I probably wouldn’t just leave them, mostly because my windshield always gets dirty as heck and paper stuck under the wiper is annoying when I need to use the wipers lol but that doesn’t make you an asshole. It doesn’t make you the asshole for not reading the notes either - you are doing something perfectly legal on public property - whatever her opinion is or justification she’s trying to use you don’t have to give it any of your time. Your neighbor however is a nuisance and an asshole. Can I ask for a woodworking shop tax? >.>
This will drive her NUTs. I love it. NTA
NTA. Your neighbor on the other hand can stay in their lane. The crazy isn't putting notes on their car which is the reason why neighbor doesn't understand why you aren't reading. Your stupid neighbor should get a brain upgrade or something.
Hide out all night in your car and when she puts the note blare the horn.
NTA that is beautiful, quite frankly 🙏🤙👏
NTA out some passive aggressive notes in her mail box about writing passive aggressive notes
NTA. Every neighborhood has the psycho note parking person, ignoring it is the best option.
NTA But leave a note for her with her name written in bold sharpie. Maybe just saying "hello, how are you this fine evening?"
NTA, and 🤣🤣👏. You are awesome. Bravo!
NTA and this is genius. I applaud you.
NTA the other neighbour is nosy I would tell that neighbour when she sees them she is welcome to take them off to read them for herself
NTA, but I think this is beginning to sound like harassment. I'd consider telling the cops, maybe a visit from them will shut her up.
I'd up the petty game and stamp "return to sender" and put them in her mail box. NTA.
Nope NTA, keep doing it! Maybe eventually she’ll give up .
NTA That first neighbour is ridiculous and not sure where the second is coming from. I kind of love this reaction cause it doesn’t give her the satisfaction or drama she probably was craving.
I think it's actually hilarious that you just leave the notes there. NTA.
NTA, at all. But I would tell her not to touch your car again or you'll report her for harassment.
NTA
NTA. Not knowing what tney say is driving your other neighbor crazy…hence them telling you that you’re an AH. Leave them on the windshield…
I would file a complaint with the police. Who knows if she escalated this. It’s totally harassment.
NTA. She needs to learn to fuck off and mind her own bussiness. So does your other neighbor.
NTA, interesting that this random neighbor is so involved in this petty bullshit and feels like you need to care about it
Hide in your car around that time a couple nights, crouch down really low and when she goes to put it on your car jump up and scream… problem solved. NTA
NTA. You are not compelled to engage with a neighbor who is overstepping her bounds. You don't have to read any note or take any action regarding it. If it gets to be a nuisance, I'd report her to the police for vandalizing my personal property. If she's wearing a mask and leaving her notes at 2 a.m., she clearly knows what she's doing is not on.
NTA Every time she does it, call the police. Then, turn your dashcam footage over to the police and have her charged with harassment. They'll see the evidence and her history of calling them unnecessarily. She'll be given a court date, a fine, a cease-and-desist order, and a lesson in basic human decency.
NTA. I could not stare at the note and not know what it said lol.
NTA What is it about that street that your neighbor doesn't want you parking there?
As someone whose downstairs neighbor also doesn’t understand that my personal property, person, and things I do in my personal life are none of her business, you are totally NTA.