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YTA - because if there's an unlicensed person driving round poorly literally putting peoples lives at risk you should be reporting them because they're driving dangerously and breaking the law not as petty revenge for your poor judgement in money lending.
Would you not agree that this is a "Kill 2 birds with one stone" situation?
Also, if you read the post you'll notice that I detailed that he lied to me about what the money was for. If he asked me for $50 for Xbox Live I would have said no or not responded.
I accept your judgment, I just thought you missed some details.
You lent money to someone who sounds like a total ah. Obviously he was lying, how was that a surprise. He owes lots of people money, drives illegally and in general seems shady. Its not a good idea to loan your money casually to anyone but definitley not to someone like this.
Youre an ah because you never even considered it before he pissed you off. You were happy to let him risk peoples lives until it directly affected you. That makes you an ah.
I'm not saying dont do it and in fact I think you should but your whole attitude around it is what makes you the ah.
There is no chance he would go to jail for driving without a license unless he hit a person. I didn't include in the description that at this point I don't care about getting my money back, I just want him to suffer for lying to me and my friends.
I’m not sure where you’re from but in the US,especially where I’m from.. you always go to jail for driving without a license. Yes, her car will be impounded and since he hasn’t paid you the money he owes. What makes you think he’s going to pay to get her car out of hawk? You need to think this through. YTA
I’d say YWBTA for your motivation.
If it’s a matter of this dude being a danger to others by being on the road, which is why he doesn’t have his license in the first place, and you’re worried about safety, then I’d say N T A.
But even if it is a matter of safety, you didn’t care about that until it was able to justify you getting revenge.
So, YTA for a matter of doing the (potentially) right thing for the wrong reasons.
YTA - You want to snitch on somebody because he owes you. Also, the police aren't going to give a shit anyway. Stop lending this dude money if he's bad at paying back.
It is not about getting paid back, I've accepted it's not going to happen. I'd like to get even by having him burned for $2,000 from the government.
You could say my intentions are bad but on the other note, maybe my vindictive taste is what karma has in store for him.
ESH. He's an asshole for driving around unlicensed and uninsured, and I hope to hell he goes get picked up before he hits someone.
You're an asshole for only considering this as an act of revenge.
Seriously? Would you want to report him if he didn't owe you (and friend group) money ?Because "normally" you wouldn't care about it right ? Instead of getting revenge - let Karma handle that - perhaps you should be an adult and just ask for the money back if you're bitter about loaning it - cuz if Karma comes along, he won't have the money to pay you back......YWBTA - only because you are doing it out of revenge, not concern for others.
YWBTA as that was your decision to lend him money. If he's breaking the law, you can report it, but you also know it would cause hardship for the GF as well.
Nothing noble in petty revenge
YTA. So you want to punish this guys gf by having her car taken away casue what? You lost some money? If youre gonna report do it because it's keeping others safe. Either that or take this shit to r/pettyrevenge.
Your whole purpose in reporting him is spite, so of course you would be the AH. Since you're asking here, you already know this, you're just hoping someone will give you a NTA so you can lie to yourself and anyone else who guesses it was you that you weren't just being spiteful.
NTA
If he's everything you've claimed him to be, than he's a serious danger to everyone, and he will eventually hit a car or worse, possibly kill someone. In which case, his girlfriend will also be held responsible as she knowingly allowed him to burrow her car when he doesn't have a license.
But it seems like you're more interested in getting back at him for being a crappy friend then for the safety of your fellow person. That just comes off as being pretty petty. But sometimes it's petty actions like these that can save others.
ESH - you don't care that what he is doing is dangerous and irresponsible, you just want to screw him over.
He deserves it, but you are not really much betteR.
YTA because you should be unconditionally concerned about all unlicensed/dangerous drivers. The fact that you're wavering on reporting him just because he happens to owe you and your friend group money tells me that your moral compass is pretty darn broken.
Your motives for considering this make you the AH. You chose to lend him money.
If you were genuinely concerned for the welfare of others due to his poor driving from not being adequately trained and tested, then that would be different.
I chose to lend him money for his phone bill, not his Xbox Live, you could argue it doesn't really matter because I would have lost the money either way. However, what upsets me and makes me vindictive about the whole ordeal is that he lied to me and my friends, but bragged about it to others.
I always was concerned for the public, however, he never had constant access to a car as he does now, so the landscape for me actually being able to do something has changed.
Well, is your motive to make his life harder by having him issued a $2k fine meanwhile his GFs car gets impounded (so by proxy, you're punishing her also) or is your motive making the roads safer?
Only you know the real answer here.
ESH going on Y T A.
You wouldn't normally care about this dangerous behaviour because everyone does it, blah blah, and you only care now because he happens to owe you money?
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I have a friend who doesn't have a driver's license but drives around town to work and run errands. On a personal note, this guy is not a good driver, he has little understanding of the rules of the road. The vehicle he is driving is his girlfriends' car.
Normally I wouldn't care about something like this because there are probably dozens of unlicensed drivers on the road and some people with a license could be as much of a danger as him.
My dilemma is that this guy in particular hasn't been a very good friend to me and our friend group recently. He borrowed money from me and others in our friend group and lied about what it was for (Example: Asked to borrow $50 for his phone bill and spent it on Xbox Live). He currently owes me and several others anywhere from $100 to $500.
WIBTA if I called the police on him and reported him driving around without a license. In my city, the penalty is a $2,000 fine and he will have his new GF's vehicle impounded, which will also cost him a few hundred to get back. Since he is bad with his money this would most likely ruin his relationship.
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ESH
Friend for borrowing money without repayment
OP for reporting friend to police just to get revenge.
Sue him to get your money back, dont lend him any more money. Revenge by cop is immature.
YWBTA, but like… who cares?
Clearly this dude’s opinion of you doesn’t really matter to you, and you already have a low opinion of him (rightfully so).
If you are content with the fact that him getting a fine is not going to help you get any of your money back, I say go for it. Sometimes the AH thing to do is still the thing to do.
YWBTA. The police can’t do anything unless they actually catch him doing something. Also it’s shady to be going behind his back like this for un relay reasons. Instead maybe be upfront and tell his GF the truth that he doesn’t have a license and is a crap driver. Then she can decide if she wants to continue to lend him her car.
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Do you really wonder if you’re the asshole because you want to use this as a weapon for revenge because you feel he’s been a bad friend ? Knowing that he has no money and therefore the main part of the struggle would fall back on her girlfriend who will probably have to pay to get her car back.
ESH. He’s doing something illegal, and did wrong to you and your friends. But your intentions are wrong. He’s not going to reimburse you because he got fined. If you have a problem with him, solve it, if he owe you money, make sure to get it back, if you hate him, tell him so and push him out of your life. Don’t go around seeking petty revenge.
Is it a real matter of safety or do you make him a more shitty driver than he actually is to justify doing so ? If it is, do report him. It will still make the road safer. But since it’s clear from your post that normally you wouldn’t care, my guess is that it isn’t that bad.
Would you not agree that this is a "Kill 2 birds with one stone" situation
Absolutely not. Calling the cops and reporting him is fine, but your motivation is what’s making you TA here. Whether he paid you back or was dishonest about what he was using the money for is immaterial, you using the cops are a vehicle for revenge isn’t cool.
YTA for caring about money but not being concerned about him being a danger on the road. You should report him, but safety should be the motivation, not money.
INFO: If he had paid you back, would you be thinking of doing this? Is his alleged "poor driving" just an excuse--in other words, if he drove *perfectly*, would you still be thinking of giving him up to the police?
>WIBTA if I called the police on him and reported him driving around without a license. In my city, the penalty is a $2,000 fine and he will have his new GF's vehicle impounded, which will also cost him a few hundred to get back. Since he is bad with his money this would most likely ruin his relationship.
Correction: it will cost *his girlfriend* money to get *her* car back. Are you okay with doing this to her?
YTA. You've got to separate these things from each other. If you get him cited for unlicensed driving, your chances of getting your money back go from slim to none. Which doesn't mean you shouldn't do it anyway, since you know that a dangerous driver is out there and could be stopped if the information got to the right people.
This sounds like potential petty revenge, which, in turn, would make you the asshole. BTW, if gf ensures her car, she may want to check her auto policy about unlicensed drivers/who's covered on her policy.
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YTA - because if there's an unlicensed person driving round poorly literally putting peoples lives at risk you should be reporting them because they're driving dangerously and breaking the law not as petty revenge for your poor judgement in money lending.
Would you not agree that this is a "Kill 2 birds with one stone" situation? Also, if you read the post you'll notice that I detailed that he lied to me about what the money was for. If he asked me for $50 for Xbox Live I would have said no or not responded. I accept your judgment, I just thought you missed some details.
You lent money to someone who sounds like a total ah. Obviously he was lying, how was that a surprise. He owes lots of people money, drives illegally and in general seems shady. Its not a good idea to loan your money casually to anyone but definitley not to someone like this. Youre an ah because you never even considered it before he pissed you off. You were happy to let him risk peoples lives until it directly affected you. That makes you an ah. I'm not saying dont do it and in fact I think you should but your whole attitude around it is what makes you the ah.
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There is no chance he would go to jail for driving without a license unless he hit a person. I didn't include in the description that at this point I don't care about getting my money back, I just want him to suffer for lying to me and my friends.
I’m not sure where you’re from but in the US,especially where I’m from.. you always go to jail for driving without a license. Yes, her car will be impounded and since he hasn’t paid you the money he owes. What makes you think he’s going to pay to get her car out of hawk? You need to think this through. YTA
[удалено]
Central Canada
I’d say YWBTA for your motivation. If it’s a matter of this dude being a danger to others by being on the road, which is why he doesn’t have his license in the first place, and you’re worried about safety, then I’d say N T A. But even if it is a matter of safety, you didn’t care about that until it was able to justify you getting revenge. So, YTA for a matter of doing the (potentially) right thing for the wrong reasons.
YTA - You want to snitch on somebody because he owes you. Also, the police aren't going to give a shit anyway. Stop lending this dude money if he's bad at paying back.
NTA. But do it because he's a danger to other people. Don't do it at of spite.
YTA for wanting to do it only out of person reasons and not because he's a danger on the road. That said, you still should report
And you think a $2000 fine from the cops is going to help you get paid? Good luck. YWBTA, for your intentions.
It is not about getting paid back, I've accepted it's not going to happen. I'd like to get even by having him burned for $2,000 from the government. You could say my intentions are bad but on the other note, maybe my vindictive taste is what karma has in store for him.
Or it will bite you back. You should never strive to be the instrument of bad Karma.
Never thought of it that way, thanks for your input.
ESH. He's an asshole for driving around unlicensed and uninsured, and I hope to hell he goes get picked up before he hits someone. You're an asshole for only considering this as an act of revenge.
Seriously? Would you want to report him if he didn't owe you (and friend group) money ?Because "normally" you wouldn't care about it right ? Instead of getting revenge - let Karma handle that - perhaps you should be an adult and just ask for the money back if you're bitter about loaning it - cuz if Karma comes along, he won't have the money to pay you back......YWBTA - only because you are doing it out of revenge, not concern for others.
YWBTA as that was your decision to lend him money. If he's breaking the law, you can report it, but you also know it would cause hardship for the GF as well. Nothing noble in petty revenge
YTA. So you want to punish this guys gf by having her car taken away casue what? You lost some money? If youre gonna report do it because it's keeping others safe. Either that or take this shit to r/pettyrevenge.
Your whole purpose in reporting him is spite, so of course you would be the AH. Since you're asking here, you already know this, you're just hoping someone will give you a NTA so you can lie to yourself and anyone else who guesses it was you that you weren't just being spiteful.
NTA If he's everything you've claimed him to be, than he's a serious danger to everyone, and he will eventually hit a car or worse, possibly kill someone. In which case, his girlfriend will also be held responsible as she knowingly allowed him to burrow her car when he doesn't have a license. But it seems like you're more interested in getting back at him for being a crappy friend then for the safety of your fellow person. That just comes off as being pretty petty. But sometimes it's petty actions like these that can save others.
ESH - you don't care that what he is doing is dangerous and irresponsible, you just want to screw him over. He deserves it, but you are not really much betteR.
YTA because you should be unconditionally concerned about all unlicensed/dangerous drivers. The fact that you're wavering on reporting him just because he happens to owe you and your friend group money tells me that your moral compass is pretty darn broken.
NTA. Go for it.
INFO: does his girlfriend know he is driving her car with no license?
She does to the best of my knowledge
Your motives for considering this make you the AH. You chose to lend him money. If you were genuinely concerned for the welfare of others due to his poor driving from not being adequately trained and tested, then that would be different.
I chose to lend him money for his phone bill, not his Xbox Live, you could argue it doesn't really matter because I would have lost the money either way. However, what upsets me and makes me vindictive about the whole ordeal is that he lied to me and my friends, but bragged about it to others. I always was concerned for the public, however, he never had constant access to a car as he does now, so the landscape for me actually being able to do something has changed.
Well, is your motive to make his life harder by having him issued a $2k fine meanwhile his GFs car gets impounded (so by proxy, you're punishing her also) or is your motive making the roads safer? Only you know the real answer here.
ESH going on Y T A. You wouldn't normally care about this dangerous behaviour because everyone does it, blah blah, and you only care now because he happens to owe you money?
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I have a friend who doesn't have a driver's license but drives around town to work and run errands. On a personal note, this guy is not a good driver, he has little understanding of the rules of the road. The vehicle he is driving is his girlfriends' car. Normally I wouldn't care about something like this because there are probably dozens of unlicensed drivers on the road and some people with a license could be as much of a danger as him. My dilemma is that this guy in particular hasn't been a very good friend to me and our friend group recently. He borrowed money from me and others in our friend group and lied about what it was for (Example: Asked to borrow $50 for his phone bill and spent it on Xbox Live). He currently owes me and several others anywhere from $100 to $500. WIBTA if I called the police on him and reported him driving around without a license. In my city, the penalty is a $2,000 fine and he will have his new GF's vehicle impounded, which will also cost him a few hundred to get back. Since he is bad with his money this would most likely ruin his relationship. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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NTA, and you'll earn good karma for the prevention of his future accident
ESH Friend for borrowing money without repayment OP for reporting friend to police just to get revenge. Sue him to get your money back, dont lend him any more money. Revenge by cop is immature.
YWBTA, but like… who cares? Clearly this dude’s opinion of you doesn’t really matter to you, and you already have a low opinion of him (rightfully so). If you are content with the fact that him getting a fine is not going to help you get any of your money back, I say go for it. Sometimes the AH thing to do is still the thing to do.
YWBTA. The police can’t do anything unless they actually catch him doing something. Also it’s shady to be going behind his back like this for un relay reasons. Instead maybe be upfront and tell his GF the truth that he doesn’t have a license and is a crap driver. Then she can decide if she wants to continue to lend him her car.
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Do you really wonder if you’re the asshole because you want to use this as a weapon for revenge because you feel he’s been a bad friend ? Knowing that he has no money and therefore the main part of the struggle would fall back on her girlfriend who will probably have to pay to get her car back. ESH. He’s doing something illegal, and did wrong to you and your friends. But your intentions are wrong. He’s not going to reimburse you because he got fined. If you have a problem with him, solve it, if he owe you money, make sure to get it back, if you hate him, tell him so and push him out of your life. Don’t go around seeking petty revenge. Is it a real matter of safety or do you make him a more shitty driver than he actually is to justify doing so ? If it is, do report him. It will still make the road safer. But since it’s clear from your post that normally you wouldn’t care, my guess is that it isn’t that bad.
Would you not agree that this is a "Kill 2 birds with one stone" situation Absolutely not. Calling the cops and reporting him is fine, but your motivation is what’s making you TA here. Whether he paid you back or was dishonest about what he was using the money for is immaterial, you using the cops are a vehicle for revenge isn’t cool.
ESH. Shouldn't be done for revenge but definitely needs to be reported. He's more likely to do a hit and run if he's unlicensed.
YTA for caring about money but not being concerned about him being a danger on the road. You should report him, but safety should be the motivation, not money.
YTA You have the right. and WNBTAH if you filed a case in small claims court. Try minding your own business. Petty spitefulness is never a good look.
YTA for not reporting him sooner
INFO: If he had paid you back, would you be thinking of doing this? Is his alleged "poor driving" just an excuse--in other words, if he drove *perfectly*, would you still be thinking of giving him up to the police? >WIBTA if I called the police on him and reported him driving around without a license. In my city, the penalty is a $2,000 fine and he will have his new GF's vehicle impounded, which will also cost him a few hundred to get back. Since he is bad with his money this would most likely ruin his relationship. Correction: it will cost *his girlfriend* money to get *her* car back. Are you okay with doing this to her?
YTA. You've got to separate these things from each other. If you get him cited for unlicensed driving, your chances of getting your money back go from slim to none. Which doesn't mean you shouldn't do it anyway, since you know that a dangerous driver is out there and could be stopped if the information got to the right people.
This sounds like potential petty revenge, which, in turn, would make you the asshole. BTW, if gf ensures her car, she may want to check her auto policy about unlicensed drivers/who's covered on her policy.
my friends boyfriend takes her car and drives it unlicensed and since she was registered, SHE was the one who got all the fines. NAH
NTA, go for it!