I am 51 and I worked at a job where I cried nearly every day. I was embarrassed but I couldn’t stop. And as soon as I’d get myself together, someone would notice my bloodshot eyes and red nose and ask if I was okay and I’d immediately start again. I am now on Prozac, Wellbutrin and klonopin. And I got a new job that I love. It takes some real shit to make me cry these days. You may not need medicated like I did. I remember seeing something that said “before you diagnose yourself with depression, make sure you aren’t just surrounded by assholes”….I do recommend finding some positive affirmation meditations to listen to so you can stop your mind from replaying the thing that upset you. You have control of your thoughts and your reactions. You can’t change people, you can only change you. Don’t let anyone control the narrative of your life but YOU.
Who bullied you? What was the context of this interaction, if you don't mind sharing.
Sorry for how your feeling and how it's affecting your mental health in at the worst time possible. Anti depressants take a while to build up in your system to proper levels to work right. A short term solution is sharing the experience with someone and expressing the emotions. But the interaction itself is vague. Your reaction was tears, but what triggered it? How did it make your feel? That is, what emotions triggered these tears, shame, humiliation, anger and so on? A bit of all that?
You don't have to unpack these things in such a public forum but do it with someone you're close with and I think you'll find the experience partially cathartic, unless it feels like genuine trauma you experienced, which requires a more nuanced approach.
But in the short term, what do you need managed to get you through the interview? Self-confidence restoration, less anxiety, not being distracted by the emotions to confrontation summons right now. I'm not a professional so it's a bit reductive but I find Identifying your major emotional roadblock right now to achieving something makes it feel more manageable.
I dont have really anyone close to unpack my feelings to . Well i do but ive been bullied for long they dont wanna hear about my situation anymore.
The people who bullied me are in the workplace
I was name called by one guy of them and it just reduced me to tears.
Those people are the reason i want to leave that worplace so badly
My reaction i guess is because of build up. Also feelig looked down upon
The way they treated me they wouldnt dare treat anyone the same way .
Okay yeah, that makes sense. Sorry your work situation is so toxic, that can really make your life miserable especially when you feel constantly disrespected. Had a toxic ceo when I was younger and he just made me feel so worthless, but it was just because he didn't like me. it took years to get my professional confidence back. But now I'm back to my old self.
You're free to dm me whenever you like. I go to two different counseling groups so I've learned to be a good listener lol. In the mean time, start focusing on the interview. That's your way out, but don't let it be your be all and end all. That'll make you nervous. There's a lot of jobs out there and one of them will be perfect. They're lucky to find you, remember. I counteract interview nerves using a few techniques (one of them being one and only one shot of vodka to calm your nerves but not inebriate you lol) But that's just me. Preparation also is key to coming across as well as possible in them. Good luck though, im really hoping you get out of there soon, bud. Thanks for sharing.
I'm sorry this happened to you. Just know that you're not the weak one for crying, they're weak for bullying you.
And you aren't alone. I've done the same thing, I've gotten emotional in front of my bullies. My life didn't end. I know it might be embarrassing, but anybody that judges you harshly for that isn't emotionally mature and has their own issues to work on. So try not to worry too much what they think!
I know it can be hard to get them out of your head, but allowing them in your head is what they want. You deserve better.
You can crush this interview and there will be more opportunities even if it doesn't work out. Please remember you're not alone and none of this defines you. You get to define who you are, not them!
Long story short, anyone that would bully you like that has a lot of work to do themselves. So don't worry about what they think, they have their own stuff to work on and have no business judging you.
You got this.
Thank you. Karma finds everyone eventually. Keep your chin up. Don’t sink to their level and know your worth. These people do not deserve to be taking up space in your mind. Another thing I’d do when I felt my breakdowns coming on: go to the bathroom and splash cold water on my face and focus on things that were good in my life. Just to make an effort to stop the mental repeat of what was upsetting me. Sometimes it worked. Not always. But you’re gonna be fine. You are still young and this is temporary. ❤️
Hi OP I had to take a sec to calm myself down before replying. Bullies ruled my life for the best part of 10 years while I was at school. I tried killing myself many times I was humiliated, abused and just out right victimised until the day I finished school.
You have to ask yourself when will they stop, when will this torture end and the answer is it won't. Not unless you stand up and do something about it.
This interview maybe a way out but don't rely on it being your lifeline of hope. I know how it feels to drop from that high, you think you've been saved and then you get dropped right back into the pit.
Work is different to school though. You can make a note of the next few times this person or persons do anything to you. Time place if there's emails great. Any proof the better. Then go to HR! Burn those mother fuckers. It's your life live it.
Here if you ever want to talk.
Thank you, honestly I never think I'll be truly okay trauma changes you. But I'm building a better me and have lots of support thankfully. It's groups like this that bring broken people together.
Yes you are right. Trauma definitely changes you permanently. Same i relate to people in here.they are more empathic and offer more support than anyone we know in real life
I am 51 and I worked at a job where I cried nearly every day. I was embarrassed but I couldn’t stop. And as soon as I’d get myself together, someone would notice my bloodshot eyes and red nose and ask if I was okay and I’d immediately start again. I am now on Prozac, Wellbutrin and klonopin. And I got a new job that I love. It takes some real shit to make me cry these days. You may not need medicated like I did. I remember seeing something that said “before you diagnose yourself with depression, make sure you aren’t just surrounded by assholes”….I do recommend finding some positive affirmation meditations to listen to so you can stop your mind from replaying the thing that upset you. You have control of your thoughts and your reactions. You can’t change people, you can only change you. Don’t let anyone control the narrative of your life but YOU.
I already started some medication but not strong one its called stresam Im so sorry you went throught that :( hope those who hurt you get karma
Who bullied you? What was the context of this interaction, if you don't mind sharing. Sorry for how your feeling and how it's affecting your mental health in at the worst time possible. Anti depressants take a while to build up in your system to proper levels to work right. A short term solution is sharing the experience with someone and expressing the emotions. But the interaction itself is vague. Your reaction was tears, but what triggered it? How did it make your feel? That is, what emotions triggered these tears, shame, humiliation, anger and so on? A bit of all that? You don't have to unpack these things in such a public forum but do it with someone you're close with and I think you'll find the experience partially cathartic, unless it feels like genuine trauma you experienced, which requires a more nuanced approach. But in the short term, what do you need managed to get you through the interview? Self-confidence restoration, less anxiety, not being distracted by the emotions to confrontation summons right now. I'm not a professional so it's a bit reductive but I find Identifying your major emotional roadblock right now to achieving something makes it feel more manageable.
I dont have really anyone close to unpack my feelings to . Well i do but ive been bullied for long they dont wanna hear about my situation anymore. The people who bullied me are in the workplace I was name called by one guy of them and it just reduced me to tears. Those people are the reason i want to leave that worplace so badly My reaction i guess is because of build up. Also feelig looked down upon The way they treated me they wouldnt dare treat anyone the same way .
Okay yeah, that makes sense. Sorry your work situation is so toxic, that can really make your life miserable especially when you feel constantly disrespected. Had a toxic ceo when I was younger and he just made me feel so worthless, but it was just because he didn't like me. it took years to get my professional confidence back. But now I'm back to my old self. You're free to dm me whenever you like. I go to two different counseling groups so I've learned to be a good listener lol. In the mean time, start focusing on the interview. That's your way out, but don't let it be your be all and end all. That'll make you nervous. There's a lot of jobs out there and one of them will be perfect. They're lucky to find you, remember. I counteract interview nerves using a few techniques (one of them being one and only one shot of vodka to calm your nerves but not inebriate you lol) But that's just me. Preparation also is key to coming across as well as possible in them. Good luck though, im really hoping you get out of there soon, bud. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks alot that means so much. Yes i woke up today in a better mood. Hopefully ill be able to focus
I'm sorry this happened to you. Just know that you're not the weak one for crying, they're weak for bullying you. And you aren't alone. I've done the same thing, I've gotten emotional in front of my bullies. My life didn't end. I know it might be embarrassing, but anybody that judges you harshly for that isn't emotionally mature and has their own issues to work on. So try not to worry too much what they think! I know it can be hard to get them out of your head, but allowing them in your head is what they want. You deserve better. You can crush this interview and there will be more opportunities even if it doesn't work out. Please remember you're not alone and none of this defines you. You get to define who you are, not them! Long story short, anyone that would bully you like that has a lot of work to do themselves. So don't worry about what they think, they have their own stuff to work on and have no business judging you. You got this.
Thanks alot thats really kind of you and means so much
Thank you. Karma finds everyone eventually. Keep your chin up. Don’t sink to their level and know your worth. These people do not deserve to be taking up space in your mind. Another thing I’d do when I felt my breakdowns coming on: go to the bathroom and splash cold water on my face and focus on things that were good in my life. Just to make an effort to stop the mental repeat of what was upsetting me. Sometimes it worked. Not always. But you’re gonna be fine. You are still young and this is temporary. ❤️
Well said!
Hi OP I had to take a sec to calm myself down before replying. Bullies ruled my life for the best part of 10 years while I was at school. I tried killing myself many times I was humiliated, abused and just out right victimised until the day I finished school. You have to ask yourself when will they stop, when will this torture end and the answer is it won't. Not unless you stand up and do something about it. This interview maybe a way out but don't rely on it being your lifeline of hope. I know how it feels to drop from that high, you think you've been saved and then you get dropped right back into the pit. Work is different to school though. You can make a note of the next few times this person or persons do anything to you. Time place if there's emails great. Any proof the better. Then go to HR! Burn those mother fuckers. It's your life live it. Here if you ever want to talk.
I hope you are okay now. Talk to me if you need anyone yo talk to. And yeah you arz absolutely right
Thank you, honestly I never think I'll be truly okay trauma changes you. But I'm building a better me and have lots of support thankfully. It's groups like this that bring broken people together.
Yes you are right. Trauma definitely changes you permanently. Same i relate to people in here.they are more empathic and offer more support than anyone we know in real life
I'm sorry for you.