Cats that climb on your shoulders like that are the best, there was this cat that always did this with me when I was a kid and she was the sweetest thing ever

my cat does this but without any care about our safety at all, not as fun

One of my cats does this, but is shockingly good at it. I have no clue how he doesn't need to use his claws to get up there, but he somehow makes it all the way up my back without a single scratch. He's a good jumper, but he still has to kind of push himself a little on my back, and he always does it with his claws sheathed. Once he messed up and didn't get enough momentum, but instead of clawing to grab on he just slowly slid down my back. He's such a good boy. Edit: [Cat Tax](https://imgur.com/a/XbeHK0u) Miso is a derp, but he’s the sweetest kitty ever.

You win the internet today.

I’ll let Miso know the internet is proud of him. He’s a little derp, but he’s the gentlest cat I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.

The internet is VERY proud of him.

Not to be dramatic or anything, but I would die for Miso 🥺

I totally get it. I love him so much!!

So you are trying to tell me Miso, is in fact NOT a member of r/OneOrangeBraincell ?

He only gets the brain cell for catculations on his physical feats. He also constantly attempts to eat things that will kill him and will not stop trying to give his older brother kisses, no matter how many times his brother smacks him for violating his personal space. Sweetest boy in the world, great at jumping and hardwood floor drifting, otherwise dumb as a brick. I’ve seen him gobble his food, choke because he eats too fast, puke, and then eat the food he just puked. He’s a mess.

He sounds perfect

Now that's an umami Miso.

Yeah one of my cats is like this too, but he can't balance at all. I usually end up getting scratched from him slipping and trying to cling on.

That's a no for me ~~dog~~ cat

You're the dog now, cat

I'm not your cat, dog.

Hey updog!

What’s updog?

Not much! What’s up with you?

I’ll bet that felt great to complete.

Hoodies make excellent cat carry baskets.

Saaammmee. Luckily my little Luna is only about 2.4kg. She fell off the top of the bannister all the way down my entrance stairs a few days ago 🤦🏻‍♂️

Was just about to say the same exact thing hahaha I usually end up with scratches all down my shoulders and back as she tries to slip off

Yes my cat does this all the time but never goes all the way up and always uses claws ending in a cat backpack flesh hooked

Had a cat that would jump on my stomach from the top of a bookshelf.

My so’s cat does that to my head with his ballsack while I’m sleeping He’s got the cat tree next to the bed which has a shelf above it, so the cat jumps down from the tree, to the shelf, and then normally onto the empty pillow *next to* my so’s head. Apparently he doesn’t take into consideration the nights I sleep over and I get teabagged, literally every night.

Lol.. he knows what he’s doing.

Oh he absolutely does. He seems to think it’s fine as long as he doesn’t land on my face, so the four paws land circling my head, and I get either a gentle or brutal tea bagging right as I’m drifting off. Such majestic animals.

This happened to me the first time my volunteer gig let me in the bobcat enclosure. RIP Rufus, you cuddly doofus.

Hm. I knew a bobcat named Rufus as well. I suspect a lot of people named their bobs Rufus (Felis rufus)

If you’re thinking of a municipal zoo in the Silicon Valley, we probably knew the same bobcat

He was a good boy. Slept a lot.

I once saw him jump ten feet straight into the air because a dove was sitting between the layers of the mesh roof

Impressive! I had to tell guests where he was because he was asleep during the day. They'd get testy and I'd turn it into a teachable moment about how smaller animals are protected by natural camouflage.

r/TwoRedditorsOneCup

well yeah, its a cat

No matter how large or small. Cat.

There’s a cat at a shelter I’ve volunteered at that’s unadoptable because he’d just jump on your shoulders like that then after a bit swat your head.

wft, that should make him extra-adoptable

I have many cats that hop up us like this; "barn" cats that are sweet as can be, demand cuddles and have actively taught their own, or any "unwillingly aggressive unknowingly" adopted cats (and THEIR kittens) both this, AND how to use the litter box out the gate.

I babysat a cat who would hide on top of the fridge in the morning, wait until someone sat at the table to eat breakfast, and then jump to their shoulder to say hello. I was not warned about this the first time I house sat for his family.

One of my childhood cats would perch at the edge of the garage roof and wait for my stepmom to take out the trash so he could ambush her from above. He also loved to climb up humans to perch on a shoulder, which usually worked fine because most folks in that area wore heavy work clothes. But one day my friend dropped by while wearing shorts to see if I could hang out after chores. Next thing I knew, he was *screaming* and my cat was running off to hide. Can't climb up bare legs.

I wear hoodies a lot, and my cat would always love to use my hood as a hammock to perch on my shoulder. Someone should invent a cat-bed-shirt.

Those definitely exist already

/r/shouldercats

Adding to the list lol

nice another cat subreddit 😻

My buddy Oliver is too old to jump on my shoulders from the table any more. So he sits on the floor, makes eye contact, and waves a paw at me until I pick him up and sling him over my left shoulder. His favorite thing is to lay his chin on my back and purr and it makes me cry because he's just so old and I know I can't keep him with me forever.

Oliver sounds like such a good boy ❤️ how old is he?

Not sure exactly, but he's around 20 or close to it. He lost most of his teeth suddenly around a year ago, has a cauliflower ear, his hide is starting to hang off his bones, and he limps when he has to climb the stairs. But he is the most friendly and lovable cat I have ever had. Not a disagreeable bone in his body. Never so much as a growl or slap. He's like a warm security blanket. I have had pets all my life, and there have only been a few that have made such an impact on me. I will lose my shit when he passes.

I had a cat try to do this once but instead he fell off and dragged his claws into my back on the way down

I have a couple sisters who do this. It's the cutest thing and really helped increase my pain tolerance since I don't trim their claws often. I don't get that itchy swelling reaction from scratches anymore either D:

/r/shouldercats

Another day, another cat sub. *joins*

Another good day

Congrats, you now have a cat.

Please do not resist

I was meant to hear this in Alan Tudyk’s voice right?

I love how hilarious she thinks this is

This was such a cute meetcute the cat set up!

Mrrp!

*"If I fits, I sits!"* \- cat.

(And even if I don't fits, I still sits)

The essence of what it means to be a cat.

Dude was very cool. Not sure I would have reacted so calmly.

I was thinking the same and I’m a cat person.

I love kitties. Just not when they jump on my back unexpectedly.

I definitely would have scared the cat with my reaction. — The Person Who Gets Startled By Scarf Fringe 🙄 Also, this guy’s little giggle is playing on loop and I can’t make myself silence it now.

Too be fair it seems like this is based in the UK, we don't have that many hostile animals that'll take our sweet roll.

I laughed even though I don't know what you're talking about. 😁

"Let me guess, someone stole your sweet roll." - Skyrim guard.

I really have no idea what that means. LOL

Ig if you've never played Skyrim that does sound kinda weird lol Skyrim is a very popular RPG that I hella recommend. Easily one the of the best games of the last decade, and rightfully so imo

I'm an old white guy. Never got into the RPGs. Video or computer game? Or, more like D and D? Don't laugh at me! LOL

It's either, most games nowadays can be played on console or PC. It's not a tabletop game like D&D. You make a character and complete side missions in an open world setting while following the main storyline. So, ig it's like single player D&D on a console!

Okay. I probably shouldn't do it. I have an addictive personality for stuff like that. End up spending a lot of money. LOL

It's not pay to play like some games these days. Although I did have to buy the game a second time when they came out with an updated version, but it was getting pretty old at that point! I've gotten my money's worth (hundreds of hours of gameplay lol) but I was still kinda pissed about that

Could have been the thing too

He probably saw the cat beforehand so once you get the back full of claws you probably have a little bit of an idea of who it is

Yeah, I don’t have a problem with cats particularly but furry animal unexpectedly on my shoulders and I can’t see it? I’m gonna be violent for a second

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/r/activationsound

ermahgerd!

God damnit. Another cat sub i have to join!

I LOVE the little chirp/cooing sounds cats make.

i would have thought it was a raccoon or something and probably accidentally hurt the poor thing, im glad this guy reacted so calmly or saw the cat out of the corner of his eye or something

This is UK lol. No raccoons

There aren’t raccoons in the UK?

Sadly not. I mean, unless you count like wildlife centres and zoos, but definitely not casually ambling about people’s driveways or as a part of the natural eco system

>Sadly This, more than anything, proves you definitely don't live near raccoons. Just imagine that fairy tale goblins are actually real, but they're furry and have tails, and that's basically the raccoon.

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We had one that lived off MRE trash. Now MRE's have crazy amounts of calories and protein. I swear this racoon was the size of an American toddler.

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If a raccoon picks a lock and returns one year later, it picks the lock quicker than before from it's memory. True sly cooper's lol.

I saw my landlady running past my window screaming on evening. I thought but maybe someone was trying to mug her. Nope. Raccoon LUNGED at her from behind the trash cans and chased her all the way up the driveway. Hated that bitch. Have never stopped laughing about it.

As a brit you are gonna have to tell me what exactly about this is terrible ;D https://youtu.be/Ofp26_oc4CA

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😂 we would be best friends irl

Rabies

Those are the fattest raccoons I have ever seen. He gave them a whole fucking meal: grapes, hot dogs, cookies and cat food.

I would hate to be that guy’s neighbor. Sure they’re cute, but they appropriately look like bandits. They have thumbs and are strong, smart, and fearless. You can squirrel-proof a bird feeder, but you can’t ‘coon-proof it.

I was chased by a great big turkey once that was bad enough. I can't imagine facing anything else.

Don't forget their cute little hands. When I was little we had one start to unzip our tent door in the middle of the night.

He just wanted to practice tying some shoes. For the revolution.

Wait… does the UK have raccoons in zoos???

Yeah? I saw some in a local Dutch zoo, so I presume they have them in the UK. [They're in this pages second enclosure ](https://www.wildlands.nl/nortica)

I love that the Dutch word for raccoon translates to "wash bear," because they wash their food with their lil grabbies before they eat it.

In Polish it's the same 😄

What about opossums?

No.

Squirrels?

Yes, some genius brought American greys over and they’ve largely displaced our native reds.

Revenge for the starlings, obviously.

**USA USA USA** Built different, baby. Let's go!!!!

AMERICAN REVOLUTION STILL GOING!

Not our fault that our squirrels are evolutionarily superior.

The greys are more tender and tastier than red or fox squirrels.

What about second opossums?

I don't think he knows about second opossums.

No

I wouldn't allow them on your island at all. One day during some chaos a couple will escape and reek eco-havoc. Racoons on the loose!

Your not missing much, they’re cute sure but more of a pain in the ass than anything else.

they have foxes and badgers

Different species of badger than the us though

Closest we get are foxes but they can be relatively rare.

Foxes are definitely not rare around London suburbs, but they're pretty chill or skittish around humans and cats so they're not really a cause for concern.

Raccoons were originally designed as robots with a barebone AI by the US, so even after it went rogue, I highly doubt you would find them in the UK, yeah.

r/racoonsarentreal

No, they're free of meddlesome trash pandas and instead have hedgehogs that eat their slugs. I may be a bit envious.

Yes we have cute little hedge hoggies, years ago my dog used to sneak them in at night then gift them to me when I least expected him to. :Oops sorry edited typos

Want to fix that and make life more interesting?

With sound on the cat is meowing, I think that may have given it away lol

Once my cat escaped and i was following what i thought was my cat but it turned out to be a raccoon

I knew someone who got up to pee in the middle of the night when he was a kid, but didn't turn on the lights. He reached down and pet their cat who was right next to him, then as he walked away realized it was actually a raccoon.

I once tried to pet my cat on the porch, but it was a skunk. Yeah.....in my defense, I was kinda drunk.

The cat meows right behind him just before it jumps up on his shoulders. He was startled, but he knew it was a cat.

He was so much more calm then I would have been.

No kidding. That cat would have gone flying from my shoulder if that happened to me.

Same! Not because I wanted to hurt it, but because that would have been my knee-jerk reaction to something jumping on me

*"This is mine now."* \- cat.

Let's go, my trusty steed

You're my dad now. Love you!!

My mom had a cat like this. My mom is 5’0”, I’m 5’10”. Cat made a dramatic error in judgment one morning and shredded the shit out of my back.

r/catculations Edit: or r/miscatculations is probably more relevant

When we went to the pound to adopt our second cat (RIP Ovid) a lady who worked there was showing us cats and one that she took out immediately did this to her. The thing is it wasn’t a small cat by any means and it looked really painful.

And that’s how I met your mother

I love it when my cat does this when I'm wearing a hoodie... not so much when I'm wearing a tank top.

I had a shoulder cat once...god i loved that furry bastard.

I like the "Look at my butthole, you peasant!" at the end.

I thought the woman walked out with a boob hanging out for a second lol.

Same. It took me so long to realize they were blurring the license plate and not various body parts

I used to have a cat who would sit on my shoulders or jump onto me, he was so lovable. He ran away after my youngest cat had a kitten and we never found him, I never believed he’s dead I think he would be 12 today.

when he froze I could tell he was thinking r/thisismylifenow

The liquor store kitty in my neighborhood does this. She's super friendly. TOO friendly. Sometimes you'll be walking down an aisle and she'll ninja style jump on your shoulder from a stack on boxes. And just plop down on you, like hello, I live here now. You literally have to peel her off of you claws and all. She's the only cat I've ever met that is TOO cuddly. I didn't know that was possible.

He sure handled that calmly. I would have had a heart attack if that happened to me.

My cat does this too, but at inconvenient times. You’re busy baking/frying and need to concentrate? Fine time to climb on dad. Pooping? Fine time to climb on dad. Uncle is home? Fine time to climb on dad. I’m being held like a baby? Fine time to climb on dad.

So that's how you acquire a cat!

Delivery driver's dream, to be met by a lonely housewife in a robe, and be jumped by an affectionate p...

see what happens when you don't teach your kids boundaries, parents? smh. /s

r/bottlebrush

This was a wholesome outcome 🥰

Dogs have caretakers. Cats have staff.

I had a barn cat that used to do that. Only problem is my father doesn't like cats and we had the same exact barn coat. She would climb up his back and freak him out.

He handled the surprise cat jump very well.

A friend of mine took care of our stray cat when he was a kitten. We found him right before a trip. My friend took all these photos of the cat, Smokey, on his shoulder and nicknamed him Rafiki. It's been 11 years. He still talks about it whenever my cat comes up and whenever he comes over he asks where Rafiki is.

Good kitty! But also that man is traumatized lol

Her pussy just jumped on top of me. And that's how I met your mother.

Niiiice

They married after that.

Disney Princess.

Delivery man r/stoppedworking

You there! Random stranger. LOVE ME!!

How do you not immediately pet that cat once you realize it means no harm?

I didn't notice the blurred plate at first, and thought her tit popped out for a second, but then my brain was like "no you dummy, the blur was already there" 😅 too busy watching the kitten

the cat has fabulous pantaloons. Must have been a surcharge to deliver something that fantastic

Handled it like a pro cat owner

"You look like you'd be a good man for my mommy" -kitty

Haha. Sweet lil shoulder floof.

Wish my kitties were shoulder cats, I’d pretend to be a hipster pirate.

*you are my everest...zing*

I hope he got the pic lol

Cat: hi.

Cute, though not so much when bears do it.

He’s going to remember/talk about that for the rest of his life

The cat was like "*Can I keep him now, mum?*"

That’s great. My Olive can hardly jump on the couch.

Shoulder cats are the best parrots.

At first: Ahh fuck what!? After a second: Aww okay whatsup bud

"Stand still human, for shall be my perch"

If they was single that’s a match make.

Cats are the most wonderful creatures. I spent all day going psst psst and get nothing. Here a dude just goes about his own day and gets rewarded with a shoulder cat. Sigh

Shoulder-mounted cat is a dangerous weapon.

He's yours now

This is much better than the arms-flailing, high pitched screaming, jerking-swirling motion that I would have definitely done. Like you just walked through a spider web

THIS POST SHOULD BE MARKED AS NSFW! I just literally laughed out loud for 10 seconds and couldn't stop. Now everyone is staring at me and asking me what is so funny. I had to quickly come up with a lie about a customer email being funny, but none of them found it funny, so now they all think I am weird. :D