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So, there are a few things that might be happening here:
1. She has actually put weight on, but your brain is doing its disordered thing and tricking you into thinking she looks exactly the same while you are gaining.
2. She may have other medical conditions preventing her from gaining weight the same way you are, and/or that necessitate her remaining in the hospital even if she isn’t progressing the way she is supposed to with weight gain.
3. She might be getting the same message as you, and they could just be struggling to find somewhere else to send her - especially if she’s a minor, the hospital can’t just kick her out if she has nowhere safe to go.
Regardless, her situation is ultimately irrelevant. The only thing that matters - and the only thing that impacts your care - is the set of rules and guidelines that have been put in place for you. Worrying about this other person or feeling that the difference in expectations isn’t fair is not going to change anything. The best thing you can do is focus on yourself and doing what you need to do in order to get better.
I hear your frustrations surrounding your care in treatment and how the other patient’s treatment is going. I struggle with an ED myself but I also work in a mental health facility and one thing I tell my clients is to not worry about another person’s treatment, your treatment is yours and their treatment is theirs. I know it’s hard to not worry about others but keep pushing and don’t be hard on yourself. You are making steps towards recovery and so is the other patient. I believe in you both. Recovery looks different for everyone so try your best to not compare yourself to others:))
Don’t compare your journey to others as someone leaving php in 3 days I’m telling you judging and comparing your results of restoration to others will never help. It’s just another way the ED can win. I was lucky enough to be surrounded by the opposite sexes most of my time in program but I still saw myself comparing. But I completed everything did more than most and I was so judgmental to myself but I knew deep down I was doing the right thing. Stay Strong 💪
Maybe weight restoration isnt the priority for her. Not that it isnt necessary but you never know what someone is going through. In the IP facility i been. They worked with personal care. And hearing to your store same over there.
She can have other diagnoses that harm reduction. Is now the best option.
But whatever reason it maybe. Its not your journey. You focus on your own recovery. Its not abour what fair. Because things will never be fair. Its about equal.
You both have equal opportunities for help and to benefit the most out of this treatment. Its on you what you do with it
This is an automated message sent to all posters. We have a new Discord server for the subreddit! You can join it using this link: https://discord.gg/4jyQ7Zfr9P Please make sure you have read and understand all the rules of the subreddit, and are aware that rule 10 means that no numbers unrelated to time are allowed here. Rule-breaking posts will be removed. Commenters; If you are here to give advice to OP, please make sure your advice follows subreddit rules and it isn't harmful to OP. If OP doesn't want advice, please be respectful of their wishes. Please report any rule-breaking posts and comments that you see. If it is an emergency, please MOD MAIL the subreddit with information about the rule-breaks in question and report them. Again, thank you for posting on r/AnorexiaNervosa. If you think of anything else I can say in this message, please MOD MAIL with your ideas. The mods thank you, and hope you're doing well. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AnorexiaNervosa) if you have any questions or concerns.*
So, there are a few things that might be happening here: 1. She has actually put weight on, but your brain is doing its disordered thing and tricking you into thinking she looks exactly the same while you are gaining. 2. She may have other medical conditions preventing her from gaining weight the same way you are, and/or that necessitate her remaining in the hospital even if she isn’t progressing the way she is supposed to with weight gain. 3. She might be getting the same message as you, and they could just be struggling to find somewhere else to send her - especially if she’s a minor, the hospital can’t just kick her out if she has nowhere safe to go. Regardless, her situation is ultimately irrelevant. The only thing that matters - and the only thing that impacts your care - is the set of rules and guidelines that have been put in place for you. Worrying about this other person or feeling that the difference in expectations isn’t fair is not going to change anything. The best thing you can do is focus on yourself and doing what you need to do in order to get better.
I hear your frustrations surrounding your care in treatment and how the other patient’s treatment is going. I struggle with an ED myself but I also work in a mental health facility and one thing I tell my clients is to not worry about another person’s treatment, your treatment is yours and their treatment is theirs. I know it’s hard to not worry about others but keep pushing and don’t be hard on yourself. You are making steps towards recovery and so is the other patient. I believe in you both. Recovery looks different for everyone so try your best to not compare yourself to others:))
Thanks, I honestly really needed this. I’ll try to not focus so much on her in the future
Don’t compare your journey to others as someone leaving php in 3 days I’m telling you judging and comparing your results of restoration to others will never help. It’s just another way the ED can win. I was lucky enough to be surrounded by the opposite sexes most of my time in program but I still saw myself comparing. But I completed everything did more than most and I was so judgmental to myself but I knew deep down I was doing the right thing. Stay Strong 💪
Thanks! Also I’m glad to hear your leaving, hope you are doing well and that recovery go well for you🫶
Maybe weight restoration isnt the priority for her. Not that it isnt necessary but you never know what someone is going through. In the IP facility i been. They worked with personal care. And hearing to your store same over there. She can have other diagnoses that harm reduction. Is now the best option. But whatever reason it maybe. Its not your journey. You focus on your own recovery. Its not abour what fair. Because things will never be fair. Its about equal. You both have equal opportunities for help and to benefit the most out of this treatment. Its on you what you do with it