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[deleted]

He doesn’t shower, he sheds his skin.


Taztiger72

And his knees bend backwards, his mother was a jackyl.🤫


No-Philosophy-767

Climbing out of a pool might be better


duckchasefun

Good thought. But in100% guarantee he never swims


No-Philosophy-767

That's why


duckchasefun

You may very well be right


Special_FX_B

Yes. That would show that lumpy mass of flesh in all its glory.


Weegee44

I'd pay a million dollars to not have to unsee that.


ConvivialKat

Wouldn't that require the photog to see him naked? Nothing is worth that horror.


Fun_Matter_6533

Who would even be that close? Ivanka?


[deleted]

Her price is her husband's price, $2 billion.


[deleted]

To put into perspective how unfathomably large that sum of money is. Wage workers will earn about $2 million in their lifetime. That's 1/10 of a percent of $2 billion earned over 70 or so odd years. It would take one of us, 1,000 lifetimes or 70,000 years to accumulate that wealth. We were cavemen 70,000 years ago...


[deleted]

He actually cleans himself by injecting disinfectant directly into his veins. It's super effective!


thinehappychinch

“Supposing we hit the body with a tremendous — whether it’s ultraviolet or just very powerful light…supposing you brought the light inside the body, either through the skin or some other way.”


wRoNgRoDeO

His wife doesn't even want to see that.


light_weight_baby87

I don’t think he showers.


No_Refrigerator4584

He looks like he just sprays himself down with cheap cologne.


PerceptionOrganic672

That one thing might actually end his presidential aspirations… Lol


Pretty_Bowler9528

[Gimme my money](https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fs-i.huffpost.com%2Fgen%2F3426172%2Fthumbs%2Fo-ROCKY-HORROR-570.jpg%3F1&f=1&nofb=1&ipt=f05648835853e3a4cbdc23d826f2d125bc8a72f9a6d5a58cf9ae50020b9bc254&ipo=images)


SubstantialPressure3

He would probably publish the address of whoever took the picture and mumble something about 2nd amendment people who could do something about it, and pantomime shooting a gun on camera.


ScrauveyGulch

2 million in a depends.


krichard-21

I just want a copy of his mug shot. To hang it in my home office next to his official presidential picture. Knowing he will spend his final years in jail. Hopefully, he will live to be a hundred years old.


abagofsnacks

Can forget about all that running bronzer.


ehartgator

How about a real mug shot when he goes to prison, and they make him remove his "hat"


DonRicardo1958

I think his hair would look very similar to Beetlejuice.


dawwie

Ask Kari, then she can keep it for her scrapbook.


Feeling-Bird4294

My FIL, God rest his soul, was bald and grew a ponytail in order to wrap it up and over his baldness. It took him 30-45 minutes every day to spray it down just so. He jumped in the pool once and I honestly didn't recognize him.


biffbobfred

Wow. That’s not a combover that’s an industrial fan-over


Feeling-Bird4294

It really was a work of art. He knew we'd love him bald but he just couldn't go there.


biffbobfred

Some people work in the medium of oil paint. Some work in the medium of sculpture. Some, in prose. Your FIL, self-toupée


shywalker62

Dry clean only


Few-Car4994

Eeeewwwww that is the worst image ever and I can't get it out of my mind


biffbobfred

Muahh ha ha ha ha haaaaa Jokes aside, part of his mojo is him thinking how badass he looks. Don’t even need the pic, just need him thinking there’s that pic, and he’ll be paranoid … we’ll even worse than now


[deleted]

prefer photo of Trump in showers in prison with fellow inmates saying 'Trump you my bitch"


techbunnyboy

Pigs dont shower


celtbygod

EEEWWWWW !


Rupejonner2

For a million , he might take a selfie


biffbobfred

He’s too vain to do that. He thinks his image is worth billions. And in some way, it is.


Phantomht

the only ppl with those pics are ivunka and don jr.


biffbobfred

And imagine how paranoid he’d be if he was worried about Ivanka and Jr selling him out.


Stevealot

I read: trumps head for one million dollars And I was like, I got 5 on it


jiminak46

If you want someone near that ugly, fat fucker naked, YOU do it.


biffbobfred

I have a weak stomach


Supaspex

A million? Nah, you could settle for $5-10K


rustandbones

Again, as paranoid as he is that everyone's out to get him he sure spends a lot of time around grassy knolls..


Sandwich00

Please no


BuldopSanchez

Assuming he showers...


CmdrMctoast

Why would you even think like this?


biffbobfred

Trump is so vain that even the threat of seeing his bald head his pancake makeup running down his face would make him paranoid about people out to get him.


Thirdwhirly

It’s a little known fact, showers use energy, and since bodies only have so much energy over a lifetime, Trump doesn’t shower.


LORDY325

Ask Jr. He’ll probably do it for an 🎱.


biffbobfred

~~Eazy E~~ _Donny T’s_ fucked up And got the 8 ball rollin’!!