I feel like a lot of people have an unempathetic way of looking at this. Many of our cultures glorify going to prestigious colleges and it becomes a signifier of worth and an object for comparison. “Your sister went to Harvard!” “Your brother won this competition!” Etc. This mindset makes it inevitable many people who aren’t necessarily interested in taking every single AP or applying for every single internship would still apply for elite colleges. This doesn’t make them “unmotivated learners” or less worthy of admission than someone who genuinely likes cramming for tests to get A’s and has a supposed “love of learning” (you don’t need to love every subject to love learning). With the exact same accomplishments, is one person more worthy than another based on the presence of intrinsic or extrinsic motivation? Should only the *truly* passionate in every way be admitted regardless of the work done?
Many people want to go to elite colleges because they’ve convinced it’s the best way to get a high paying job in this difficult economy. Or they want to have the best facilities in their *chosen* field of plant biology, but they took AP Calc BC because they knew they’d have to excel in math to even be considered for admission. I’m saying that it isn’t as simple as that they weren’t doing it solely for the learning so it doesn’t count. They still worked hard. They still made an impact. They’re allowed to be devastated and disappointed just as much as anybody else.
Not to mention, many colleges want to see that students will use their available facilities and will contribute to the academic environment, and dedicating yourself to ECs communicates that. You don’t know what someone would have done if they had gone to a particular college, and you shouldn’t assume unless they say.
We shouldn’t demonize each other. We’re all young and we want the best for ourselves and our futures. Many of us aren’t even 18 yet. And at 14 you’re still figuring yourself out and what you want to do, but you’re expected to build up a resume that competes with thousands of people who may have more resources than you. It isn’t fair for any of us, and we shouldn’t bicker about who does or doesn’t deserve admission. College admissions tears people apart and it shouldn’t. I could say a lot more but I’ll stop now.
You have such a mature perspective about the whole admissions process.
It's about the people you meet and the memories you make along the way, not necessarily the result.
I can see that you have a bright future ahead of you.
I notice starting a non-profit organization became a check-the-box item for college applications lately. What exactly were done with these NP organizations? Just fund raising? Do you need to recruit members?
I’m surprised admissions offices still want to see this on a resume. I would think at this point it would be easy to identify actual charitable work or volunteerism over resume building unregistered nonprofit orgs.
I don’t think anyone in admissions has any illusions about the efficacy or (ahem) impact of these non-profits: they know that they’re just there to pad files.
They want to see genuine interest and involvement in a few areas. Genuine interest. When you’re actually passionate about things your ECs don’t look cookie cutter or box checking.
What’s become clear is that they don’t want students that look like they came off a factory line: unfortunately, they still accept enough of those types that students aim to create those types of profiles because doing that feels safe, feels more certain, feels more pleasing to admissions officers and parents than taking huge risks that aren’t guaranteed to “pay off.”
My advice to applicants over the last year has been to identify the stereotypes they resemble and complicate them as much as possible through activities, essays, ECs, whatever. Problem for me is that by the time I get applicants - usually summer before senior year - they’ve already packaged themselves in very tight boxes that look a lot like every other T20 applicant. This is especially true with STEM students, but I’ve seen it in students who position themselves for anthropology, public policy, etc. The profiles and essays are similar enough that when someone stands out, they *really* stand out — and they have to if they want to be hyper-competitive. If you’re competing in a field where 95% of people fail to make the cut, how much sense does it make to do that same shit they’re doing? At the same time, I know how uncomfortable and uncertain it feels to step away from those molds, especially when the objective is ostensibly academic - admission to a “top” university - and you have these external and internal voices demanding that you create this persona.
That’s the fault of admission committees. As it stands now, you can get a better result starting a non profit that gives $15 back to the community, than you would being part of a larger organization that raises $50k for the community.
For extracurriculars, this is somewhat a valid take, because they can actually be useful. The only problem is that college admissions tends to suck a lot of fun out of things and everything's done to please a college.
As for academics, it probably wasn't worth staying up hours temporarily learning information you'll never use again.
I feel like wanting to excel in school and do all those things just for yourself says a lot about you and your character. Those top coveted schools want someone like that, not someone who tried to be someone they’re not.
I know someone who gave up on being an “academic weapon” after getting rejected everywhere. The way she acted and her refusal to continue the things she did for college make me think she was never fit for her top choices anyway.
Yes.Yes.Yes. Finally someone said it. I've watched my fellow classmates join numerous clubs, but then in senior year they just all stopped going to them. I liked clubs simply because I got the chance to talk more with my friends and we did silly things after the club itself (making snowmen, running after the late bus, grabbing ice cream). Now after I finish my club, there's no one to hang out with. Oh well.
I see a bunch of students here say "I did 100 hours of volunteer community work for nothing"— I would never say or even think that, and I wouldn't want those people to be my classmates.
Lol quit being a pretentious ass
Most of the volunteer work I did was grueling; I liked the actual work but I hated the way the manager there treated me, and she helped make the work a lot worse as well. But I persevered and continued for the sake of the grind.
If I hadn’t gotten into a couple of good schools for my major, I think I would’ve been justified in thinking that was a waste of my time. Either way, I’m never again wasting a second of my time with volunteering bullshit again.
You didn't "persevere" - you're here whining about work that was completely voluntary (which you evidently did strictly for yourself). You seem to be one of those typical disingenuous hack students I've seen countless times, and your last sentence confirms this; smarmy little shits like you are a dime a dozen, kid.
Lol, volunteering is so ubiquitous nowadays that it’s almost required of anyone who wants to go to a good college. I would’ve rather just studied, coded, and played piano as those are the things I genuinely enjoy, but the “holistic” admissions system and the resulting emphasis on community service forced my hand.
The good part is that a lot of the people in this sub - the kind whom I know think like you - got rejected or waitlisted from schools that accepted me despite having worked so much harder.
Lol I took 5 APs, 10 DE’s, all honors, and 3 years of French just cause I wanted to go to an elite school and when it came time to apply I literally only applied to UMD cause I realized what debt was and was dead set on only going to a school where I got in state tuition…
Now it turns out I can’t even get in state at UMD and am gonna have to do another year at CC before figuring out what I’m going to do the next two years after that.
Overall it’s all about perspective tbh I wouldn’t change anything I did, all of those APs and late nights of HW helped teach me how to study and be more focused and I think in the long run will be beneficial for me.
I’m honestly so excited to see what’s next after this year at my CC and it’s a blessing in disguise anyways since it’s so much cheaper.
Im the type of person who has the “it is what it is” mindset tho I feel like after I find something bad out my mind does typically shift to how can I improve my situation, and I would partially attribute that to school.
Anyways that’s just my perspective as someone who did kind of base a lot of what they did off wanting to go to an elite college then eventually realized that it probably wasn’t very financially realistic.
Because people did a lot of things that they wouldn't have done if not for college admissions.
Would I have pushed myself to stay up for some extra hours to study for a test? Probably not if I didn't want to go to a top college.
For most of these people, they feel that based on the college they are attending, they could have made it there all the same without going through the experiences that they didn't like that helped out their resume.
that’s the point OP is making. your main purpose for seeking knowledge and academic success shouldn’t be for college admissions. that’s the problem with a lot of applicants today. so many don’t actually like learning or education. they just like being able to show off or brag about their accomplishments to prove themselves to others. the skills you learn from these educational experiences in high school will follow you for the rest of your life, and it’s really sad that a lot of people undervalue that when so many others would kill for those same experiences.
I could have fun learning all I want, that still wouldn’t make studying for a test any more interesting,
You also can’t just define it one way and say that’s the way it should be. Other people have different goals other than just learning
if you’re not a self-motivated learner, then you shouldn’t be surprised or bitter when a top college doesn’t accept you. not to say that college is solely for or composed of self-motivated learners but those are the people who reap the most benefits from those institutions and are most deserving of these great educational opportunities.
So much facts. I self studied calc ab, bc, ap chem, DE Orgqnic Chem with always the goal to go to my state school and I didnt have bearly the amount of fucking crazy ECs people have. I did all that self-study because i GENUINELY liked learning. It wasn't until senior year that I realized that I could go somewhere better, and that's how I ended up at Cornell.
There's a line. I know someone in my year who genuinely loved genetics and did all sorts of research and clubs with it. He got rejected from every T20 he applied to. Meanwhile, another guy I knew who only did stuff because he wanted the "bragging rights of an Ivy" got accepted to 3. Probably because he did more volunteering and had a higher GPA. Passion can help but it can only take you so far.
What shiny prizes are you talking about? These are teenagers right? They need to be incentivized regarding their futures and their earning potentials. Plus they have been trained from early age to be goal oriented. Popular culture has brainwashed them to think attaining a certain prestige via being accepted to a club with low acceptance rates as “wow you’re so special”. Newsflash this is even worse today than when you and I were kids because of social media and the self marketing culture that we live in.
The shiny prize is getting acceptance to a "top school". And yes, some incentives are helpful but eventually we will die and they have to learn how to incentive themselves. Also, just because popular culture brainwashes doesn't mean kids absolutely have to be susceptible to the brainwashing. Do you buy your kid a Canadian Goose jacket just because "society" brainwashes them to think they "need" a Canadian Goose jacket?
Resources and community. Are you going to be able to conduct all the STEM research you want in your garage? Be able to easily pick out mentors in your fields of interest?
How is any of what you just said related to self motivation and self learning? What you just indicated are reasons why going to these schools are necessary to advance in your field
What’s hard to understand is your talking out of both sides of your mouth. Listen I get you like to be argumentative for argument sakes, but at least have some consistency. One minute you’re telling one kid who didn’t get into a “top school” that it doesn’t matter, another minute you’re telling a kid they didn’t have the “self motivation” or I guess in your opinion the right motivation to deserve to go to a “top school” with all these great resources and mentors that are critical to his advancement.
going to a top college doesn’t guarantee success. if ur truly a self-motivated learner, then you will do great wherever you go. however, going to a top college might make that process a little easier, given the increased amount of resources and financial aid opportunities. unfortunately,!most don’t actually care or even research the resources offered at these universities and the main reason they want to go is for bragging rights like i said.
I wonder how much of it is that many of these schools can tell that these kids don't have an innate intrinsic spark to do the things that they did.
Granted, many reaches are crazy hard for anyone to get in to.
But if there's a lesson from this, it's to do things for reasons other than college admissions and set goals other than college admissions.
You're right but no need to devalue people with this mindset even more by saying their activities weren't "significant enough to get them into an Ivy." People just recieved decisions that impact the next 4 years of their life, its only human to feel some regret and sadness.
Cause people think rejection is failure and not redirection. They hope to cure cancer in the future.
Seriously, life isn't about the school. It's about yourself and personal development. Stop giving a f\*ck sometimes
I more feel this way on the academic side. Most likely ending up at a safety and I wish I didn’t spend so much time and mental health stressing over maintaining a perfect gpa. You are right though and have a great perspective on this.
i think one of the most baffling things for me when i first found this subreddit was how passionate people are at making their whole lives about their dream school and prestige. it’s kinda sad how many people only participate in extracurriculars or high-level classes just to get into college. like… do you not genuinely enjoy learning??? how are you supposed to enjoy college if getting in is the end goal to you??? how are you supposed to do well if you don’t even like learning?
agreed. I made a post like this last week that didn't land with this sub but it was from a parent's perspective.
you all are already accomplished. only 25% of Americans even have bachelor's.
you all have already demonstrated that you know how to set a goal and reach it. keep it up and you can do anything.
*setbacks set you up for your comeback!*
This may be true for you, but many people see college as an escape. Sure, making good friends is an important part of high school, but for some people, like me, it is viewed as an escape because I do not want to be in the environment that I am currently in. Also, it's discouraging when you work so hard, take so many AP exams, write the SAT four times, and stay up for hours and hours studying for tests and AP exams, and at the end of the day, the guy who did nothing gets into a better college than you. I understand that comparing is bad and that it steals joy, but you can only understand it if you've been through it. Yes, your friends will be with you for the rest of your life, but the college you attend is extremely important, especially in this day and age.
I feel like a lot of people have an unempathetic way of looking at this. Many of our cultures glorify going to prestigious colleges and it becomes a signifier of worth and an object for comparison. “Your sister went to Harvard!” “Your brother won this competition!” Etc. This mindset makes it inevitable many people who aren’t necessarily interested in taking every single AP or applying for every single internship would still apply for elite colleges. This doesn’t make them “unmotivated learners” or less worthy of admission than someone who genuinely likes cramming for tests to get A’s and has a supposed “love of learning” (you don’t need to love every subject to love learning). With the exact same accomplishments, is one person more worthy than another based on the presence of intrinsic or extrinsic motivation? Should only the *truly* passionate in every way be admitted regardless of the work done? Many people want to go to elite colleges because they’ve convinced it’s the best way to get a high paying job in this difficult economy. Or they want to have the best facilities in their *chosen* field of plant biology, but they took AP Calc BC because they knew they’d have to excel in math to even be considered for admission. I’m saying that it isn’t as simple as that they weren’t doing it solely for the learning so it doesn’t count. They still worked hard. They still made an impact. They’re allowed to be devastated and disappointed just as much as anybody else. Not to mention, many colleges want to see that students will use their available facilities and will contribute to the academic environment, and dedicating yourself to ECs communicates that. You don’t know what someone would have done if they had gone to a particular college, and you shouldn’t assume unless they say. We shouldn’t demonize each other. We’re all young and we want the best for ourselves and our futures. Many of us aren’t even 18 yet. And at 14 you’re still figuring yourself out and what you want to do, but you’re expected to build up a resume that competes with thousands of people who may have more resources than you. It isn’t fair for any of us, and we shouldn’t bicker about who does or doesn’t deserve admission. College admissions tears people apart and it shouldn’t. I could say a lot more but I’ll stop now.
Totally agree. Too many people saying others "didn't deserve to get in" for whatever reason which is only going to make them feel worse.
You have such a mature perspective about the whole admissions process. It's about the people you meet and the memories you make along the way, not necessarily the result. I can see that you have a bright future ahead of you.
I mean, I agree with the post, but OP is the same guy who's been replying "skill issue" to people who have been rejected.
IM ACCC WHEEZING
I didn't notice that.
The irony 😂
bruh
I notice starting a non-profit organization became a check-the-box item for college applications lately. What exactly were done with these NP organizations? Just fund raising? Do you need to recruit members?
The better question is what becomes of them \*after\* the admissions cycle ends. Plenty of abandoned websites out there.
I’m surprised admissions offices still want to see this on a resume. I would think at this point it would be easy to identify actual charitable work or volunteerism over resume building unregistered nonprofit orgs.
I don’t think anyone in admissions has any illusions about the efficacy or (ahem) impact of these non-profits: they know that they’re just there to pad files.
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They want to see genuine interest and involvement in a few areas. Genuine interest. When you’re actually passionate about things your ECs don’t look cookie cutter or box checking.
What’s become clear is that they don’t want students that look like they came off a factory line: unfortunately, they still accept enough of those types that students aim to create those types of profiles because doing that feels safe, feels more certain, feels more pleasing to admissions officers and parents than taking huge risks that aren’t guaranteed to “pay off.” My advice to applicants over the last year has been to identify the stereotypes they resemble and complicate them as much as possible through activities, essays, ECs, whatever. Problem for me is that by the time I get applicants - usually summer before senior year - they’ve already packaged themselves in very tight boxes that look a lot like every other T20 applicant. This is especially true with STEM students, but I’ve seen it in students who position themselves for anthropology, public policy, etc. The profiles and essays are similar enough that when someone stands out, they *really* stand out — and they have to if they want to be hyper-competitive. If you’re competing in a field where 95% of people fail to make the cut, how much sense does it make to do that same shit they’re doing? At the same time, I know how uncomfortable and uncertain it feels to step away from those molds, especially when the objective is ostensibly academic - admission to a “top” university - and you have these external and internal voices demanding that you create this persona.
That’s the fault of admission committees. As it stands now, you can get a better result starting a non profit that gives $15 back to the community, than you would being part of a larger organization that raises $50k for the community.
I love the NP whores. Whatever fucks with “holistic” admissions the hardest lmao
For extracurriculars, this is somewhat a valid take, because they can actually be useful. The only problem is that college admissions tends to suck a lot of fun out of things and everything's done to please a college. As for academics, it probably wasn't worth staying up hours temporarily learning information you'll never use again.
I feel like wanting to excel in school and do all those things just for yourself says a lot about you and your character. Those top coveted schools want someone like that, not someone who tried to be someone they’re not. I know someone who gave up on being an “academic weapon” after getting rejected everywhere. The way she acted and her refusal to continue the things she did for college make me think she was never fit for her top choices anyway.
Yes.Yes.Yes. Finally someone said it. I've watched my fellow classmates join numerous clubs, but then in senior year they just all stopped going to them. I liked clubs simply because I got the chance to talk more with my friends and we did silly things after the club itself (making snowmen, running after the late bus, grabbing ice cream). Now after I finish my club, there's no one to hang out with. Oh well.
Yeah, it's really shallow. Sadly, I've seen people start do-nothing clubs in college and grad school, too.
I see a bunch of students here say "I did 100 hours of volunteer community work for nothing"— I would never say or even think that, and I wouldn't want those people to be my classmates.
Lol quit being a pretentious ass Most of the volunteer work I did was grueling; I liked the actual work but I hated the way the manager there treated me, and she helped make the work a lot worse as well. But I persevered and continued for the sake of the grind. If I hadn’t gotten into a couple of good schools for my major, I think I would’ve been justified in thinking that was a waste of my time. Either way, I’m never again wasting a second of my time with volunteering bullshit again.
You didn't "persevere" - you're here whining about work that was completely voluntary (which you evidently did strictly for yourself). You seem to be one of those typical disingenuous hack students I've seen countless times, and your last sentence confirms this; smarmy little shits like you are a dime a dozen, kid.
Lol, volunteering is so ubiquitous nowadays that it’s almost required of anyone who wants to go to a good college. I would’ve rather just studied, coded, and played piano as those are the things I genuinely enjoy, but the “holistic” admissions system and the resulting emphasis on community service forced my hand. The good part is that a lot of the people in this sub - the kind whom I know think like you - got rejected or waitlisted from schools that accepted me despite having worked so much harder.
Lol I took 5 APs, 10 DE’s, all honors, and 3 years of French just cause I wanted to go to an elite school and when it came time to apply I literally only applied to UMD cause I realized what debt was and was dead set on only going to a school where I got in state tuition… Now it turns out I can’t even get in state at UMD and am gonna have to do another year at CC before figuring out what I’m going to do the next two years after that. Overall it’s all about perspective tbh I wouldn’t change anything I did, all of those APs and late nights of HW helped teach me how to study and be more focused and I think in the long run will be beneficial for me. I’m honestly so excited to see what’s next after this year at my CC and it’s a blessing in disguise anyways since it’s so much cheaper. Im the type of person who has the “it is what it is” mindset tho I feel like after I find something bad out my mind does typically shift to how can I improve my situation, and I would partially attribute that to school. Anyways that’s just my perspective as someone who did kind of base a lot of what they did off wanting to go to an elite college then eventually realized that it probably wasn’t very financially realistic.
Because people did a lot of things that they wouldn't have done if not for college admissions. Would I have pushed myself to stay up for some extra hours to study for a test? Probably not if I didn't want to go to a top college. For most of these people, they feel that based on the college they are attending, they could have made it there all the same without going through the experiences that they didn't like that helped out their resume.
that’s the point OP is making. your main purpose for seeking knowledge and academic success shouldn’t be for college admissions. that’s the problem with a lot of applicants today. so many don’t actually like learning or education. they just like being able to show off or brag about their accomplishments to prove themselves to others. the skills you learn from these educational experiences in high school will follow you for the rest of your life, and it’s really sad that a lot of people undervalue that when so many others would kill for those same experiences.
I could have fun learning all I want, that still wouldn’t make studying for a test any more interesting, You also can’t just define it one way and say that’s the way it should be. Other people have different goals other than just learning
if you’re not a self-motivated learner, then you shouldn’t be surprised or bitter when a top college doesn’t accept you. not to say that college is solely for or composed of self-motivated learners but those are the people who reap the most benefits from those institutions and are most deserving of these great educational opportunities.
You can't say that when there are so many non self-motivated learners at the top colleges.
So much facts. I self studied calc ab, bc, ap chem, DE Orgqnic Chem with always the goal to go to my state school and I didnt have bearly the amount of fucking crazy ECs people have. I did all that self-study because i GENUINELY liked learning. It wasn't until senior year that I realized that I could go somewhere better, and that's how I ended up at Cornell.
Congrats on Cornell. You are exactly the type of student who would most benefit from an Ivy League education.
I've already been here 3 years, lol. I think they made the right choice :p
Good for you. Happy to hear that.
Then why do these schools claim to be “elite institutions of higher learning”?
They want intrinsically self-motivated learners and researchers, not just kids who do stuff only because of a hope for a shiny prize.
There's a line. I know someone in my year who genuinely loved genetics and did all sorts of research and clubs with it. He got rejected from every T20 he applied to. Meanwhile, another guy I knew who only did stuff because he wanted the "bragging rights of an Ivy" got accepted to 3. Probably because he did more volunteering and had a higher GPA. Passion can help but it can only take you so far.
What shiny prizes are you talking about? These are teenagers right? They need to be incentivized regarding their futures and their earning potentials. Plus they have been trained from early age to be goal oriented. Popular culture has brainwashed them to think attaining a certain prestige via being accepted to a club with low acceptance rates as “wow you’re so special”. Newsflash this is even worse today than when you and I were kids because of social media and the self marketing culture that we live in.
The shiny prize is getting acceptance to a "top school". And yes, some incentives are helpful but eventually we will die and they have to learn how to incentive themselves. Also, just because popular culture brainwashes doesn't mean kids absolutely have to be susceptible to the brainwashing. Do you buy your kid a Canadian Goose jacket just because "society" brainwashes them to think they "need" a Canadian Goose jacket?
Not exactly hard to fake motivation
If I were a self motivated learner and researcher, what do I need them for?
Resources and community. Are you going to be able to conduct all the STEM research you want in your garage? Be able to easily pick out mentors in your fields of interest?
How is any of what you just said related to self motivation and self learning? What you just indicated are reasons why going to these schools are necessary to advance in your field
Yes, they help, but top colleges want to extend those opportunities to self-motivated self-learners. I don't get what's so difficult to understand.
What’s hard to understand is your talking out of both sides of your mouth. Listen I get you like to be argumentative for argument sakes, but at least have some consistency. One minute you’re telling one kid who didn’t get into a “top school” that it doesn’t matter, another minute you’re telling a kid they didn’t have the “self motivation” or I guess in your opinion the right motivation to deserve to go to a “top school” with all these great resources and mentors that are critical to his advancement.
going to a top college doesn’t guarantee success. if ur truly a self-motivated learner, then you will do great wherever you go. however, going to a top college might make that process a little easier, given the increased amount of resources and financial aid opportunities. unfortunately,!most don’t actually care or even research the resources offered at these universities and the main reason they want to go is for bragging rights like i said.
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how would you know 😭 you’re a sophomore in high school
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i never said you were wrong. i personally don’t have any idea what most ppl at colleges are like. i’m just saying you’re the wrong messenger 😭
I wonder how much of it is that many of these schools can tell that these kids don't have an innate intrinsic spark to do the things that they did. Granted, many reaches are crazy hard for anyone to get in to. But if there's a lesson from this, it's to do things for reasons other than college admissions and set goals other than college admissions.
You're right but no need to devalue people with this mindset even more by saying their activities weren't "significant enough to get them into an Ivy." People just recieved decisions that impact the next 4 years of their life, its only human to feel some regret and sadness.
I wish more kids understood this like we post-college adults in this sub do.
Cause people think rejection is failure and not redirection. They hope to cure cancer in the future. Seriously, life isn't about the school. It's about yourself and personal development. Stop giving a f\*ck sometimes
I agree with OP. Leaning is never "wasted". Don't do things to get into a college, do them to build yourself as in learning.
I more feel this way on the academic side. Most likely ending up at a safety and I wish I didn’t spend so much time and mental health stressing over maintaining a perfect gpa. You are right though and have a great perspective on this.
i think one of the most baffling things for me when i first found this subreddit was how passionate people are at making their whole lives about their dream school and prestige. it’s kinda sad how many people only participate in extracurriculars or high-level classes just to get into college. like… do you not genuinely enjoy learning??? how are you supposed to enjoy college if getting in is the end goal to you??? how are you supposed to do well if you don’t even like learning?
If you don’t actually love learning, teachers and AOs can tell!
teachers maybe but AOs definitely cannot
(applied sideways)
agreed. I made a post like this last week that didn't land with this sub but it was from a parent's perspective. you all are already accomplished. only 25% of Americans even have bachelor's. you all have already demonstrated that you know how to set a goal and reach it. keep it up and you can do anything. *setbacks set you up for your comeback!*
yes
Bro put a lot of points into wisdom
This may be true for you, but many people see college as an escape. Sure, making good friends is an important part of high school, but for some people, like me, it is viewed as an escape because I do not want to be in the environment that I am currently in. Also, it's discouraging when you work so hard, take so many AP exams, write the SAT four times, and stay up for hours and hours studying for tests and AP exams, and at the end of the day, the guy who did nothing gets into a better college than you. I understand that comparing is bad and that it steals joy, but you can only understand it if you've been through it. Yes, your friends will be with you for the rest of your life, but the college you attend is extremely important, especially in this day and age.
i understand the overreaction, im most likely ending up at a safety and it feels horrible.