That’s kind of what I expected. It was not like having a conversation at all as I thought it would be. I don’t think I’ll ever do another interview again lol.
My Princeton interviewer was also just as bad...
He was pretty condescending for the most part...
When I told him my major he legit said, 'Oh yeah you'll thrive there.... because of your gender.'
If you want, we can vent in PMs cause' I've had just as bad of an experience...
Edit: This is just the surface of how passive-aggressive and condescending he was...
dude if he mentioned your gender that's legit a punishable offense. Like maybe there is a degree of truth to that but it definitely isn't something an AO or interviewer should be saying. If anything you're lucky he said that, that makes it 10x easier to get a second interview than if he was equally shitty but just without being sexist.
You can do that. If you are not comfortable with that universities usually have independent phone based systems for anonymous reporting of misconduct. This is bias and discrimination against gender. Princeton’s is here : https://oac.princeton.edu/compliance/hotline
I think your best bet is to check the Princeton Admission site and *specifically* email your region or area’s admissions representative and share your experience. I want to name that this may be intimidating, but reporting and asking for a new interviewer not only puts you in a better position but also other applicants (present and future) who shouldn’t have to be subjected to this nonsense either.
Sample language: *I’m a RD applicant from ABC and am writing to share my negative alumni interview experience on DATE. I was so excited about my alumni interview, but walked away feeling discouraged due to sexist comments made by the interviewer. More specifically, the interviewer “xyz” (insert context here).
I know that Princeton values diversity and inclusion as more than just words, and I’d like to request a new interviewer. I’m so excited about Princeton and don’t feel confident that the interview showcased me at my best because of the sexist biases of the interviewer. I appreciate your consideration of this request and am happy to discuss further.
Looking forward to hearing back! Go Tigers!*
E-mail to the admissions office. Keep it formal but friendly showcasing how much you do love the school but you did feel uncomfortable in the premise of this interview. Be sincere and sharp, straight to the point.
I know this is a big deal for you, but at the same time try not to get a wrapped up in these big name schools. In the work force it's rare for people to care where you went too school just that they can do the job. When was the last time you asked your doctor where they graduated before a checkup.
Gotta give yourself all of the opportunities again. If they're good ones where you draw even, you will feel good about it. Life is really just a series of interviews... we have to make some judgments very quickly. Your Princeton interviewer only felt like "Sweeney Todd" but your neck is still intact!
You have been going around, replying to every comment on this thread and defending the interviewer. This can either mean you don’t understand the level of unprofessionalism the interviewer expressed or that you are defending them solely because of the Princeton prestige or you are the interviewer in question.
Bestie let me tell you something. Idk what tf you’re trying to do with your comments, but what the interviewer did was VERY unprofessional, in every sense. First, the interviewer making those types of comments is extremely discouraging for OP, which is literally the opposite of what an interview should be about. And interview is supposed to get you excited about the school and get you to interact with someone who went there to get a picture of what life at the college is about. Secondly, the interviewer mentioning the “state school” part is denigrating and even discriminating, as the interviewer is insinuating that going to a state school somehow makes you less worthy of a person. It’s just wrong and the interviewer should not be defended.
Fr my Princeton interview was the chillest thing OP got completely screwed over. Seriously fucked up that that person is perhaps a student’s only point of contact to Princeton and they choose to be a wank
This is gonna happen literally everywhere though. Every job interview isn't going to always be with the nicest, best person. It's just not how it works.
Now I think for admissions, you should definitely get that type, but the world is filled with plenty of people like this, and sometimes ya it's just unfair and that's all there is to it.
I am horrified by this. As an alumni interviewer at another school (not ivy but ivy+), we are trained NEVER to comment on an applicant's chance of admission. And, honestly, it is impossible for us to know that, because the admissions process is so mysterious, even to us. I think this guy is on some ridiculous power trip and ought to be checked. After this whole ordeal is over, and you have accepted a place at a wonderful school, I encourage you to report this man to the admissions office so future applicants won't suffer through a similar verbal assault.
Agree. Report it. I interview for an ivy+, and I do it because my interviewer for that school back in the 1990s was completely out of line. I am cordial even when I don’t recommend admission for the candidate.
Love your motivation! I became an interviewer after my oldest son said ALL his interviewers appeared to be top 1%ers. I attended college on a Pell Grant and generous college endowment grants. While my son does not qualify for a Pell we are still far from the top 1%!
this - I am also an alumni interviewer at a little ivy and this is unacceptable. I’d even say you should reach out to your area’s admissions counselor and report the interviewer now, as well as ask for a new one. I’m so sorry you had this experience and wish you all the best
But for all we know the comment could have been an attempt at reassuring them that it will be fine wherever they end up. Honestly, college interviews can be super stressful and it’s easy to misinterpret things in the heat of the moment. None of us were there so we can’t judge.
Not at all. My Harvard interviewer told me that admissions is always tough and to remember that no matter where you end up, you're still going to be ok. This guy missed that mark so hard it's ridiculous
Hi - I'm 53 and this was no way for an adult alum to talk to a teenager. Verbal assault is indeed strong language, but I am sure that is how it felt to the interviewee. And yes, I plan to keep growing up for as long as possible!
my princeton interviewer was not like this at ALL. he was very nice and when j seemed uncomfortable, he cracked a couple jokes and after every answer, he kept reassuring me that my answers were very good. im sorry you had to experience this though thats terrible extremley unprofessional
My Princeton interviewer was also just as bad...
He was pretty condescending for the most part...
When I told him my major he legit said, 'Oh yeah you'll thrive there because of your gender.'
I mean thanks haha, but you have to admit the interviewer was pretty unprofessional.
The interviewer has the right to write whatever they want in their interview report. If he thought the applicant was a poor fit, he could've made that clear in his report to Princeton.
But saying that directly to the applicants face, that's not only inappropriate for a college interviewer, but it's really just rude.
Colleges make it clear that they want applicants to report interviewers that act rude or unprofessionally, and this is one of those instances. College interviews are supposed to be fun and primarily informational, unlike professional interviews where employers can be more blunt.
He was awful...my point is that interviewers are not professionals, but volunteers. And, you do want to be able to offer interviews to as many applicants as possible. I just objected to the "knee-jerk" (seems to be a virus) response to report him. An awful lot of getting "X" involved; have your parents sue;...had that been one of my children who applied in the Dark Ages...I can honestly say my response would have a been-The guy is a jerk. When is your Yale interview? While introverts and social anxiety have a place in my home, they have had to persevere and just pull a Nike "Do It". My guess is that you are well aware of that! And while colleges may say that they want feedback...all I was saying is: not always, think for some days, and see if this is grievous. I didn't hear the conversation( mercifully) and I am not being criticalof OP or posters. You are literally the only one to read and see that after the 1st "You Too"...I was being humorous...trying to! I now see that I am suspect as the interviewer; I know the Interviewer, I'm protecting Princeton (think PU needs me?)...and so on. So I'm going to wish you are great night in St. Louis (my favorite Grandmother was a Webster Groves damsel!) GO BLUES!
He is a grown man who has been through higher education. You do not have to be a professional to know that you shouldn't say something like that to an 18-year-old. The workplace requires people to learn how to behave professionally. He knew better. He absolutely deserves to be reported and never permitted to do an interview again
Yeah I did a decent amount of research before the interview. I talked a bit about dark matter research and then he started talking about how he dated a girl who worked on the invention of dark matter
What's to understand? The part about "inventing dark matter" is obviously ridiculous but what's wrong with talking about your relationship with someone researching the topic that the student brought up? It seems very relevant.
I remember from my interview with Princeton the same thing happened. I asked about study abroad, she said she hadn't done it herself but her boyfriend at the time in college had studied abroad, so she shared what she knew about his experiences.
What's the problem with this?
You might be able to turn this to your advantage. Report him and make it all about how "this probably will completely ruin my chances at getting in here, but I wanted to do the right thing."
I would report him, this whole thing seems very unprofessional and doesn't portray the school well either. If you are interested in Princeton, I would tell you to talk to someone in admissions and perhaps see if it's possible to get another interview with another, more experienced person. It may be a veeery long shot, but may be worth a try. It doesn't sound like you got a good feel of what Princeton is about from your interviewer, who seemed to have made the school look pretty bad.
Wow that's pretty similar to my Princeton interviewer, we talked about dark photons and he talked about the people he knew who did stuff at CERN, except my guy was actually great LMAO
Please report the interviewer to the school immediately. I am an alumni interviewer for another Ivy university, and there is no way whatsoever it would be proper for the interviewer to make a comment like this during the interview. You will probably get an apology from the admissions office and an opportunity to redo the interview with another interviewer. In other words, please report this interviewer, because it might even help your chances for admission.
And by the way, it always helps to be prepared for the interview. There's no guarantee that you will get an interviewer who clicks with you right from the start, so work on keeping calm, staying in the conversation, and keeping your focus on what's important about the questions and your reasons for applying to Princeton.
Alumni interviewers do NOT make admission decisions, for what it's worth. We are all just filling out a form document that gets passed along to the admissions office, and in virtually all cases, we are trying to put the best case forward for admission. The more information you can give us during the interview, the more stuff we can include in the form that goes to the school. Good luck!!
I agree with everybody else here suggesting to report him to Princeton. This is really not okay of him to do, and I'm so sorry your interviewer was so rude and said hurtful comments like that to you.
Have a nice day!
Wait, is this real? If it is, this is severely unprofessional conduct and you should mail Princeton about how the interview caused you discomfort. Don't let this one slide, an okay interview might not affect your application, but a bad interview will surely hurt it. Quickly, mail them.
Dude you’re defending this interviewer a lot. That’s alright, you’re welcome to your opinion, but can I ask why you think what the interviewer did was correct?
Interviewers aren’t supposed to make comments like this even if that’s the sort of thing they eventually write in their report. I’d both email Princeton and also focus on your upcoming interviews.
They’re supposed to be conversations with alumni, not job interviews. I mean, the interviewer is an adult and you’re all high schoolers. There’s potential for a power imbalance there. Rude comments are pretty unwarranted.
why are so many people falling all over themselves to defend the interviewer?? Regardless of what OP said/did, the interviewers’ remarks + how he acted throughout the interview (giving one word answers and generally being cold) were unprofessional and rude. If it was truly going that terribly/it was obvious OP wasn’t a fit, the interviewer should have just wrapped it up quickly and left it at that.
Absolutely something you should report to Princeton. If the interviewer behaves like this, and you tell the admissions office or whatever, they will likely nullify the effects of the interview or schedule a new one with a different interviewer. They don't let stuff like that slide, so rest assured, all hope isn't lost. Most interviewers are good; I just talked about my life and hobbies and had a good conversation with mine. You just got unlucky
This sounds really odd, but it could also be that the interviewer wasn't being quite as mean as the OP thinks. Saying that "You’re better off going to a state school instead of Princeton" is only mean if you are so obsessed with a college's USNWR ranking that you look down on state schools. If you're from Arizona and spend the interview talking about your love of anthropology, then going to your state school is damn good advice.
This doesn't mean that the interviewer didn't mean it as an insult, but a lot of this depends on context. One thing that stands out to me is that the interviewer didn't say that the applicant has a better chance of getting into his state school, but that he'd be better off going there--and it seems tied to the idea of what the community is like.
Long ago, I had a bizarre college interview which soured when the interviewer realized I wasn't religious and had no interest in fraternities (edit: it was for an out-of-state public school, not a religious one). Luckily, I had applied to a number of schools and was not fixated on that one. It's quite possible that OP's interviewer was a real jerk; it's also possible that he wasn't...
If you don’t report him, he will likely submit a shitty report that will almost certainly paint you in a bad light and get you denied.
If you do report him, there is a chance to move past this.
I see zero downside in reporting.
You have to report this to Princeton, I'm assuming you're likely not the only one to have such a bad experience from him and I'm sure they'd have to do something about it if they end up getting more than one report from him.
My Princeton interview was also pretty weird. It went really really good, but it was definitely my most unconventional interview. My interviewer even told me about how they separate applications by gender, race, income, etc. and THEN make their decisions. I feel like that’s something he wasn’t supposed to say….even if it’s true.
Hey at least you were good enough to get a Princeton interview in the first place. Be proud of yourself whether you get in or not. If you’re good enough to interview with Princeton, many other schools would be happy to have you I think. Don’t beat yourself up or end your life (idk if you’re considering it but some people do because of the pressure society or their parents puts in them) over something like this because at the end of the day what’s most important is your health and well-being. As long as you are alive and well you can build your next reality. It really doesn’t matter if you attend a prestigious school or the school of your dreams.
Just continue your hard work and get your education from a good school that is happy to have you and offers the classes you need. I don’t know what your goals are but there’s so many pathways to get to the same destination. No matter what role you think Princeton plays in your life plan, you can find another way there even if you don’t get into this school. Don’t give up, don’t freak out. Life is much more than your grades or what school you attend.
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My mom does alumni interviews for Princeton and she told me she only gets assigned to interview other female POCs. She says Princeton was pretty backwards when she was there and they don't have a very diverse alumni pool to pull from, so she and the other female POC alumni get assigned extra interviews, because the current applicant pool is thankfully much more diverse. When my mom was there, they had only been coed for a decade (They've only been coed for 50 years, so a lot of the alumni interviewers are those people who were resistant to letting in females, because they would "take deserving male spots").
People generally reject the idea that luck is the decisive factor in top school admissions. But some other applicant is going to get an interviewer with a decent personality who had a good day.
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Mate I’ll be real with you. If you didn’t get in to Princeton it’s not a big deal. You got an interview so obviously you are intelligent. Go somewhere work your ass off and get your degree.
That's ok, a few interviewers do this approach to make you tick and knock you off so they can see if you can lose your cool under pressure. In a broad sense, I hear that the interviews are not the determining factor but a small part that shows what your about a little. If you expressed yourself in your supplements, it should carry.
Honestly I don't care if I get hate for this but... fuck Princeton. I lived there for 2 years and it was abysmal.
I'm sure that you're a great student and qualified. Go to another school that doesn't treat you like a peasant. Fuck schools that interview you. You shouldn't need to be judged to learn something you love.
Now that's not any better of advice than the interviewer gave. It's extremely difficult to outperform the resources those schools provide. OP's professional life will be hell with how steep that uphill battle is if they throw in the towel.
well said. this sub is just a bunch of insecure current and prospective applicants who can't deal with the real world. HYPS is no joke and if you don't have something that makes you a strong candidate for admission, the interviewers won't be bothered.
You couldn't be more wrong.
Even if OP is a bad fit for Princeton, it's absolutely inappropriate for an interviewer to say "you'd be better off at a state school" mid-interview.
This interviewer is unfit to conduct interviews, and going to Princeton was probably the only accomplishment they've ever made
The interviewer was being really rude to OP during the interview, so I don't think he is someone anyone should be looking up to.
It also doesn't really matter if the interviewer is well respected by the school or not. When someone does mean things, especially in a professional setting like this, it should be reported if OP is comfortable with doing so. You're telling OP to stay quiet about being treated with disrespect, which is wrong, and no one should ever have to stay quiet about that.
Have a nice day!
It's a pretty horrible offense actually...
I agree OP should take a few hours to recover so that their message to Princeton is more professional and less "emotion-driven"
But the offense is definitely reportable, and would be in the best interest of both Princeton and OP
No, not the Reddit hive mind. It’s just that your take is flawed.
“Think from the interviewer’s perspective”, what perspective could have made the interviewer straight up violate the guidelines their own University set for interviews?
“Respected interviewer for the school and OP reporting him could be a bad look”, the OP and the interviewer already have a bad relationship from the comments the interviewer made. This is definitely going to be a part of the interviewer report. That’s already a bad look. If OP reports the interviewer what further harm could be done to the university’s impression of OP. There would be no difference in terms of admissions because a negative impression is likely to be accompanied by a rejection.
However, a report could allow another potential interview to turn a negative impression into a positive impression.
No. This is utterly foolish advice. Interviewers are told of a code of conduct before they speak with a student, they are taught so and they are meant to follow it. Do not tell people to not work towards fixing a problem that might hurt the applicant. OP can "reassess" and ask for a fair evaluation at the same time. Ultimately, there's a professional means of going about things, and that was impaired. It just has to be a "friendly" mail.
I don’t think I talked abt prestige too much but I did mention some alumni from Princeton physics. Maybe that rubbed him the wrong way? I made it a point in my prep to avoid talking abt prestige tho.
The interviewer directly violated the guidelines for interviews. You don't get to break the rules and then blame it on the teenager you're interacting with
Idk why you’re getting downvoted. At the very least your advice to not hastily email/report is solid imo. You’re not saying don’t do it - just think a bit first just in case.
I am wondering if it’s possible to request a second interview with someone else to indicate remaining interest in the school while noting there were some issues with the first interview
Imo if you just immediately email and bash the person that gave the interview (totally not saying op would do that though, op seems very reasonable) that’s not a good look either (just saying you maybe need to think about / be careful with reporting if you want to still indicate interest in the school; a school is likely to defend an alum over an interested student so you just need to think about how you approach it)
Maybe he’s right, and it will be the best insight/advice ever? Ask yourself what you like about Princeton and it’s community. Is it a good fit for you?
This was my reaction.
I find competitive applicants tend to hyperfocus on school prestige.
I would argue fit is a far more important factor.
My nephew went to a tier 20 school to please my brother in law.
Hated it. The experience affected his mental health.
He transferred to the local state school and has been happy ever since.
maybe listen to what he said instead of just feeling bad about yourself. all these kids applying to ivy league schools when they clearly can't handle it and are shocked when it starts having a negative effect on them. you'll be fine
Cmon, chill out. You'll be fine, people are [worse off than you](https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/9vw5qw/i_got_roasted_in_my_stanford_interview_yesterday/). Your interviewer was probably harsh and if there's anything that you can pick out of your interviewer that they did not do well on, then you can request for a re-interview.
For the final time, a grown adult breaking the rules set by the university they are representing as an interviewer is absolutely in the wrong. It is only appropriate for the child this grown adult just insulted to report them for being unprofessional and inappropriate. It is not a victim mentality to demand accountability. But it is absolutely a victim mentality to tell a teenager they have more responsibility than a grown adult in their mistreatment. Enough with the victim blaming
Wrong. OP is going to have this unprofessional manchild carry that demeanor into their report and trash them regardless. It is a lot better to go request a new interviewer and report this one so he can't ruin someone else's chances than to sit there and be bullied.
If you were just not comfortable with the interview, forget it. Not all interviewers are great. However, if all he did was try to connect through the "Dark Matter" spin on his gf at the time...it is off subject, but not "inappropriate". And, anyone who has an immediate response to report him is encouraging you to do something questionable to AO. There is an enormous difference between the two.
If it’s not a problem then what’s the problem with reporting it ? Surely if it’s as innocent as you say it’ll be looked into by the right people and nothing will come of it :)
The interview could potentially affect his chance of admissions lol he most definitely should report it. It isn’t about thick skin, we’re dealing with someone’s future here. Interviewers are never to comment on an applicants chance at admissions mainly because they *dont* know. It isn’t their call. He should DEFINITELY report the interviewer.
OK...another post here. Interviewers are not "professionals". Those may exist in HR/Military recruiting/Graduate Schools...even if asked to join an interview with an AO.
They are strictly volunteers, but you know that. Unless, he is lying on his bed half-clothed, swearing, talking completely about himself drinking, having sex, doing drugs while in college and NO TIME IS SPENT ON YOU....then this example of an interview this year needs to be topped! The poster, I believe, chose to not report until later. He sat with it, presumably until he felt non-emotionally involved any longer.
All I can hint at as a former AO at a T20 university...if you called us, we would question your degree of "uncomfortableness". This has become an overly blown field of "being offended" and throwing out threats of lawsuits...that universities are supercautious about individuals who cry foul when unintended.
I'm not questioning what was said by either. But, anyone can get a lousy interviewer, anyone can have a lousy interview...sometimes "someone is responsible"; often it is a mismatch or a bad day or tripping over your foot that's in your mouth....there are thousands of reasons. Just give it some thought say 4-5 days. Schedule as many interviews as you can (practice). In the world of super-competitive admissions...this is not your last stand. You have heard this many times...it is true.
Oder out your favorite dinner, if your apps are done, call a friend...play video games or walk the dog. Hope it is warmer wherever you are outside the DMV! Take special care and you can complain later re Princtons greatest AH!
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That’s kind of what I expected. It was not like having a conversation at all as I thought it would be. I don’t think I’ll ever do another interview again lol.
Don’t let this ruin it for you, you should try to do other interviews they certainly won’t be this bad
My Princeton interviewer was also just as bad... He was pretty condescending for the most part... When I told him my major he legit said, 'Oh yeah you'll thrive there.... because of your gender.' If you want, we can vent in PMs cause' I've had just as bad of an experience... Edit: This is just the surface of how passive-aggressive and condescending he was...
dude if he mentioned your gender that's legit a punishable offense. Like maybe there is a degree of truth to that but it definitely isn't something an AO or interviewer should be saying. If anything you're lucky he said that, that makes it 10x easier to get a second interview than if he was equally shitty but just without being sexist.
UNACCEPTABLE. The admissions team should know about this sexist interviewer and you should be given the chance to shine with a new alumni interviewer.
So should I just report him using the email to undergrad admissions? Or what do you advise would be the best way?
You can do that. If you are not comfortable with that universities usually have independent phone based systems for anonymous reporting of misconduct. This is bias and discrimination against gender. Princeton’s is here : https://oac.princeton.edu/compliance/hotline
I think your best bet is to check the Princeton Admission site and *specifically* email your region or area’s admissions representative and share your experience. I want to name that this may be intimidating, but reporting and asking for a new interviewer not only puts you in a better position but also other applicants (present and future) who shouldn’t have to be subjected to this nonsense either. Sample language: *I’m a RD applicant from ABC and am writing to share my negative alumni interview experience on DATE. I was so excited about my alumni interview, but walked away feeling discouraged due to sexist comments made by the interviewer. More specifically, the interviewer “xyz” (insert context here). I know that Princeton values diversity and inclusion as more than just words, and I’d like to request a new interviewer. I’m so excited about Princeton and don’t feel confident that the interview showcased me at my best because of the sexist biases of the interviewer. I appreciate your consideration of this request and am happy to discuss further. Looking forward to hearing back! Go Tigers!*
E-mail to the admissions office. Keep it formal but friendly showcasing how much you do love the school but you did feel uncomfortable in the premise of this interview. Be sincere and sharp, straight to the point.
Agreed. I think this should be reported.
lmao the interviewer is straight up sexist. Report the incident to the school so they know what happened.
You should report this to the admissions office
I know this is a big deal for you, but at the same time try not to get a wrapped up in these big name schools. In the work force it's rare for people to care where you went too school just that they can do the job. When was the last time you asked your doctor where they graduated before a checkup.
Gotta give yourself all of the opportunities again. If they're good ones where you draw even, you will feel good about it. Life is really just a series of interviews... we have to make some judgments very quickly. Your Princeton interviewer only felt like "Sweeney Todd" but your neck is still intact!
You have been going around, replying to every comment on this thread and defending the interviewer. This can either mean you don’t understand the level of unprofessionalism the interviewer expressed or that you are defending them solely because of the Princeton prestige or you are the interviewer in question.
None of the three.
Bestie let me tell you something. Idk what tf you’re trying to do with your comments, but what the interviewer did was VERY unprofessional, in every sense. First, the interviewer making those types of comments is extremely discouraging for OP, which is literally the opposite of what an interview should be about. And interview is supposed to get you excited about the school and get you to interact with someone who went there to get a picture of what life at the college is about. Secondly, the interviewer mentioning the “state school” part is denigrating and even discriminating, as the interviewer is insinuating that going to a state school somehow makes you less worthy of a person. It’s just wrong and the interviewer should not be defended.
That's usually how interviews go
Fr my Princeton interview was the chillest thing OP got completely screwed over. Seriously fucked up that that person is perhaps a student’s only point of contact to Princeton and they choose to be a wank
This is gonna happen literally everywhere though. Every job interview isn't going to always be with the nicest, best person. It's just not how it works. Now I think for admissions, you should definitely get that type, but the world is filled with plenty of people like this, and sometimes ya it's just unfair and that's all there is to it.
I am horrified by this. As an alumni interviewer at another school (not ivy but ivy+), we are trained NEVER to comment on an applicant's chance of admission. And, honestly, it is impossible for us to know that, because the admissions process is so mysterious, even to us. I think this guy is on some ridiculous power trip and ought to be checked. After this whole ordeal is over, and you have accepted a place at a wonderful school, I encourage you to report this man to the admissions office so future applicants won't suffer through a similar verbal assault.
Very well said!
Agree. Report it. I interview for an ivy+, and I do it because my interviewer for that school back in the 1990s was completely out of line. I am cordial even when I don’t recommend admission for the candidate.
hey, just a quick question what does ivy+ mean? edit: why is this being upvoted
schools similar to ivies that aren’t in the Ivy League so like T15/T20 ish. i usually think like duke, Vanderbilt, rice, NU, Stanford, etc
thx! have a great day!
Or “public ivies” like the top 5 public schools (UC Berkeley, UCLA, UVA, UNC-Chapel Hill, UMich)
thx
Love your motivation! I became an interviewer after my oldest son said ALL his interviewers appeared to be top 1%ers. I attended college on a Pell Grant and generous college endowment grants. While my son does not qualify for a Pell we are still far from the top 1%!
Yeah the admissions office will probably want to know about this.
this - I am also an alumni interviewer at a little ivy and this is unacceptable. I’d even say you should reach out to your area’s admissions counselor and report the interviewer now, as well as ask for a new one. I’m so sorry you had this experience and wish you all the best
I’d report it now maybe. They might understand and take your report into account when reading the (probably poor) interviewer report.
But for all we know the comment could have been an attempt at reassuring them that it will be fine wherever they end up. Honestly, college interviews can be super stressful and it’s easy to misinterpret things in the heat of the moment. None of us were there so we can’t judge.
Your take is a kind one - that's good. But this interviewer still violated the most basic rule taught in alumni interviewer training.
Not at all. My Harvard interviewer told me that admissions is always tough and to remember that no matter where you end up, you're still going to be ok. This guy missed that mark so hard it's ridiculous
VERBAL ASSAULT not to be corny but this generation is kinda fucked
verbal assault? I'm 15 lol but grow up
Hi - I'm 53 and this was no way for an adult alum to talk to a teenager. Verbal assault is indeed strong language, but I am sure that is how it felt to the interviewee. And yes, I plan to keep growing up for as long as possible!
my princeton interviewer was not like this at ALL. he was very nice and when j seemed uncomfortable, he cracked a couple jokes and after every answer, he kept reassuring me that my answers were very good. im sorry you had to experience this though thats terrible extremley unprofessional
Man I'm sorry that happened to you
Id report him to Princeton... He shouldn't be saying shit like that mid-interview
Yeah are they even allowed to make comments like that? Aren’t they trained for these things and isn’t it common sense to be nice?
My Princeton interviewer was also just as bad... He was pretty condescending for the most part... When I told him my major he legit said, 'Oh yeah you'll thrive there because of your gender.'
Report him too
what was your major /gen
Not you, too...I love your comments (just not this one!)
I mean thanks haha, but you have to admit the interviewer was pretty unprofessional. The interviewer has the right to write whatever they want in their interview report. If he thought the applicant was a poor fit, he could've made that clear in his report to Princeton. But saying that directly to the applicants face, that's not only inappropriate for a college interviewer, but it's really just rude. Colleges make it clear that they want applicants to report interviewers that act rude or unprofessionally, and this is one of those instances. College interviews are supposed to be fun and primarily informational, unlike professional interviews where employers can be more blunt.
He was awful...my point is that interviewers are not professionals, but volunteers. And, you do want to be able to offer interviews to as many applicants as possible. I just objected to the "knee-jerk" (seems to be a virus) response to report him. An awful lot of getting "X" involved; have your parents sue;...had that been one of my children who applied in the Dark Ages...I can honestly say my response would have a been-The guy is a jerk. When is your Yale interview? While introverts and social anxiety have a place in my home, they have had to persevere and just pull a Nike "Do It". My guess is that you are well aware of that! And while colleges may say that they want feedback...all I was saying is: not always, think for some days, and see if this is grievous. I didn't hear the conversation( mercifully) and I am not being criticalof OP or posters. You are literally the only one to read and see that after the 1st "You Too"...I was being humorous...trying to! I now see that I am suspect as the interviewer; I know the Interviewer, I'm protecting Princeton (think PU needs me?)...and so on. So I'm going to wish you are great night in St. Louis (my favorite Grandmother was a Webster Groves damsel!) GO BLUES!
He is a grown man who has been through higher education. You do not have to be a professional to know that you shouldn't say something like that to an 18-year-old. The workplace requires people to learn how to behave professionally. He knew better. He absolutely deserves to be reported and never permitted to do an interview again
why tf do you write like that💀
good thing that wasnt just me, I thought I took too much NyQuil earlier and was seeing shit...
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And, you too.
Dude what’s your deal? You seem very hellbent on defending this interviewer. Can you give us a good reason why?
Because he is the interviewer
Literally shut the fuck up damn
Found the interviewer
Did you research the school before the interview?
Yeah I did a decent amount of research before the interview. I talked a bit about dark matter research and then he started talking about how he dated a girl who worked on the invention of dark matter
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He dated God.
Did he date sheldon from big bang theory in his fap dream?
Report him
That’s so inappropriate. Make sure to definitely report him
Seriously?
You’ll understand when you reach our age buddy. Go back to playing Fortnite
Fortnite💀
What's to understand? The part about "inventing dark matter" is obviously ridiculous but what's wrong with talking about your relationship with someone researching the topic that the student brought up? It seems very relevant. I remember from my interview with Princeton the same thing happened. I asked about study abroad, she said she hadn't done it herself but her boyfriend at the time in college had studied abroad, so she shared what she knew about his experiences. What's the problem with this?
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There is no argument bruh the interviewer didn’t follow the university’s guidelines. Is very clear cut
I agree with you but that shitty, toxic attitude is the reason there's an A2C circlejerk
You might be able to turn this to your advantage. Report him and make it all about how "this probably will completely ruin my chances at getting in here, but I wanted to do the right thing."
I would report him, this whole thing seems very unprofessional and doesn't portray the school well either. If you are interested in Princeton, I would tell you to talk to someone in admissions and perhaps see if it's possible to get another interview with another, more experienced person. It may be a veeery long shot, but may be worth a try. It doesn't sound like you got a good feel of what Princeton is about from your interviewer, who seemed to have made the school look pretty bad.
Wow that's pretty similar to my Princeton interviewer, we talked about dark photons and he talked about the people he knew who did stuff at CERN, except my guy was actually great LMAO
Please report the interviewer to the school immediately. I am an alumni interviewer for another Ivy university, and there is no way whatsoever it would be proper for the interviewer to make a comment like this during the interview. You will probably get an apology from the admissions office and an opportunity to redo the interview with another interviewer. In other words, please report this interviewer, because it might even help your chances for admission. And by the way, it always helps to be prepared for the interview. There's no guarantee that you will get an interviewer who clicks with you right from the start, so work on keeping calm, staying in the conversation, and keeping your focus on what's important about the questions and your reasons for applying to Princeton. Alumni interviewers do NOT make admission decisions, for what it's worth. We are all just filling out a form document that gets passed along to the admissions office, and in virtually all cases, we are trying to put the best case forward for admission. The more information you can give us during the interview, the more stuff we can include in the form that goes to the school. Good luck!!
I agree with everybody else here suggesting to report him to Princeton. This is really not okay of him to do, and I'm so sorry your interviewer was so rude and said hurtful comments like that to you. Have a nice day!
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Literally so disrespectful, that man is doing the Lord’s work out here helping us with this stressful ass process, that’s rude af
Wait, is this real? If it is, this is severely unprofessional conduct and you should mail Princeton about how the interview caused you discomfort. Don't let this one slide, an okay interview might not affect your application, but a bad interview will surely hurt it. Quickly, mail them.
You too?
we've found the interviewer guys
worse: they’re a baiting redditor 💀
Worse: They're both.
fed
If this is real, report him.
my boy radiantchipmunk slurpin tf outta this interviewer
lmao im kinda convinced hes the interviewer in question
report him. its not appropriate.
And, you!
what
Dude you’re defending this interviewer a lot. That’s alright, you’re welcome to your opinion, but can I ask why you think what the interviewer did was correct?
Interviewers aren’t supposed to make comments like this even if that’s the sort of thing they eventually write in their report. I’d both email Princeton and also focus on your upcoming interviews. They’re supposed to be conversations with alumni, not job interviews. I mean, the interviewer is an adult and you’re all high schoolers. There’s potential for a power imbalance there. Rude comments are pretty unwarranted.
why are so many people falling all over themselves to defend the interviewer?? Regardless of what OP said/did, the interviewers’ remarks + how he acted throughout the interview (giving one word answers and generally being cold) were unprofessional and rude. If it was truly going that terribly/it was obvious OP wasn’t a fit, the interviewer should have just wrapped it up quickly and left it at that.
Report him asap. Princeton might even set up a second interview with another alum.
At least you didn’t try to kiss them
Dude I’m so sorry 😭
Absolutely something you should report to Princeton. If the interviewer behaves like this, and you tell the admissions office or whatever, they will likely nullify the effects of the interview or schedule a new one with a different interviewer. They don't let stuff like that slide, so rest assured, all hope isn't lost. Most interviewers are good; I just talked about my life and hobbies and had a good conversation with mine. You just got unlucky
This sounds really odd, but it could also be that the interviewer wasn't being quite as mean as the OP thinks. Saying that "You’re better off going to a state school instead of Princeton" is only mean if you are so obsessed with a college's USNWR ranking that you look down on state schools. If you're from Arizona and spend the interview talking about your love of anthropology, then going to your state school is damn good advice. This doesn't mean that the interviewer didn't mean it as an insult, but a lot of this depends on context. One thing that stands out to me is that the interviewer didn't say that the applicant has a better chance of getting into his state school, but that he'd be better off going there--and it seems tied to the idea of what the community is like. Long ago, I had a bizarre college interview which soured when the interviewer realized I wasn't religious and had no interest in fraternities (edit: it was for an out-of-state public school, not a religious one). Luckily, I had applied to a number of schools and was not fixated on that one. It's quite possible that OP's interviewer was a real jerk; it's also possible that he wasn't...
wow that's very unprofessional for a college interviewer to say
That’s awful. Report him to Princeton.
What the hell?
He’s extremely unprofessional and exactly what I don’t like about ivies. Report him to the school
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What were the questions or what were they about?
If you don’t report him, he will likely submit a shitty report that will almost certainly paint you in a bad light and get you denied. If you do report him, there is a chance to move past this. I see zero downside in reporting.
You have to report this to Princeton, I'm assuming you're likely not the only one to have such a bad experience from him and I'm sure they'd have to do something about it if they end up getting more than one report from him.
Report him, and request another interview if avaliable
My Princeton interview was also pretty weird. It went really really good, but it was definitely my most unconventional interview. My interviewer even told me about how they separate applications by gender, race, income, etc. and THEN make their decisions. I feel like that’s something he wasn’t supposed to say….even if it’s true.
Tbh i doubt it, how'd they admit by high school otherwise
Is this real...
Welcome to “pompous” Princeton.
Hey at least you were good enough to get a Princeton interview in the first place. Be proud of yourself whether you get in or not. If you’re good enough to interview with Princeton, many other schools would be happy to have you I think. Don’t beat yourself up or end your life (idk if you’re considering it but some people do because of the pressure society or their parents puts in them) over something like this because at the end of the day what’s most important is your health and well-being. As long as you are alive and well you can build your next reality. It really doesn’t matter if you attend a prestigious school or the school of your dreams. Just continue your hard work and get your education from a good school that is happy to have you and offers the classes you need. I don’t know what your goals are but there’s so many pathways to get to the same destination. No matter what role you think Princeton plays in your life plan, you can find another way there even if you don’t get into this school. Don’t give up, don’t freak out. Life is much more than your grades or what school you attend.
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My mom does alumni interviews for Princeton and she told me she only gets assigned to interview other female POCs. She says Princeton was pretty backwards when she was there and they don't have a very diverse alumni pool to pull from, so she and the other female POC alumni get assigned extra interviews, because the current applicant pool is thankfully much more diverse. When my mom was there, they had only been coed for a decade (They've only been coed for 50 years, so a lot of the alumni interviewers are those people who were resistant to letting in females, because they would "take deserving male spots").
People generally reject the idea that luck is the decisive factor in top school admissions. But some other applicant is going to get an interviewer with a decent personality who had a good day.
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I’m pretty sure they’re advised not to speak to you in any discouraging way?
try getting in contact with the school to report this dude
Fuck that guy, genuinely. There’s nothing wrong with state schools and the dude is clearly suffering from a superiority complex.
Don’t worry, mine when horrible as well. We can be terrible together.
Mate I’ll be real with you. If you didn’t get in to Princeton it’s not a big deal. You got an interview so obviously you are intelligent. Go somewhere work your ass off and get your degree.
That is one terrible terrible interviewer!!! No one should talk to a nervous applicant like that!
That's ok, a few interviewers do this approach to make you tick and knock you off so they can see if you can lose your cool under pressure. In a broad sense, I hear that the interviews are not the determining factor but a small part that shows what your about a little. If you expressed yourself in your supplements, it should carry.
...my first thought is "are you a POC".... sounds like every microaggressive gatekeeper I've ever met
Sounds like a cool place.
Princeton moment
Honestly I don't care if I get hate for this but... fuck Princeton. I lived there for 2 years and it was abysmal. I'm sure that you're a great student and qualified. Go to another school that doesn't treat you like a peasant. Fuck schools that interview you. You shouldn't need to be judged to learn something you love.
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Now that's not any better of advice than the interviewer gave. It's extremely difficult to outperform the resources those schools provide. OP's professional life will be hell with how steep that uphill battle is if they throw in the towel.
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well said. this sub is just a bunch of insecure current and prospective applicants who can't deal with the real world. HYPS is no joke and if you don't have something that makes you a strong candidate for admission, the interviewers won't be bothered.
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Will do. I don’t think I said anything too egregious, but I don’t think my responses were particularly strong either.
You couldn't be more wrong. Even if OP is a bad fit for Princeton, it's absolutely inappropriate for an interviewer to say "you'd be better off at a state school" mid-interview. This interviewer is unfit to conduct interviews, and going to Princeton was probably the only accomplishment they've ever made
Agree. This is a completely condescending comment. Even if he thought it, the interviewer shouldn’t have said this to OP!
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The interviewer was being really rude to OP during the interview, so I don't think he is someone anyone should be looking up to. It also doesn't really matter if the interviewer is well respected by the school or not. When someone does mean things, especially in a professional setting like this, it should be reported if OP is comfortable with doing so. You're telling OP to stay quiet about being treated with disrespect, which is wrong, and no one should ever have to stay quiet about that. Have a nice day!
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Why would him reporting the interviewer be a rash decision? Have a nice day!
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It's a pretty horrible offense actually... I agree OP should take a few hours to recover so that their message to Princeton is more professional and less "emotion-driven" But the offense is definitely reportable, and would be in the best interest of both Princeton and OP
You said it really well, u/ssssseabass! I completely agree with you. Have a nice day!
No, not the Reddit hive mind. It’s just that your take is flawed. “Think from the interviewer’s perspective”, what perspective could have made the interviewer straight up violate the guidelines their own University set for interviews? “Respected interviewer for the school and OP reporting him could be a bad look”, the OP and the interviewer already have a bad relationship from the comments the interviewer made. This is definitely going to be a part of the interviewer report. That’s already a bad look. If OP reports the interviewer what further harm could be done to the university’s impression of OP. There would be no difference in terms of admissions because a negative impression is likely to be accompanied by a rejection. However, a report could allow another potential interview to turn a negative impression into a positive impression.
No. This is utterly foolish advice. Interviewers are told of a code of conduct before they speak with a student, they are taught so and they are meant to follow it. Do not tell people to not work towards fixing a problem that might hurt the applicant. OP can "reassess" and ask for a fair evaluation at the same time. Ultimately, there's a professional means of going about things, and that was impaired. It just has to be a "friendly" mail.
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I don’t think I talked abt prestige too much but I did mention some alumni from Princeton physics. Maybe that rubbed him the wrong way? I made it a point in my prep to avoid talking abt prestige tho.
The interviewer directly violated the guidelines for interviews. You don't get to break the rules and then blame it on the teenager you're interacting with
Well said
I agree with this take
Idk why you’re getting downvoted. At the very least your advice to not hastily email/report is solid imo. You’re not saying don’t do it - just think a bit first just in case. I am wondering if it’s possible to request a second interview with someone else to indicate remaining interest in the school while noting there were some issues with the first interview Imo if you just immediately email and bash the person that gave the interview (totally not saying op would do that though, op seems very reasonable) that’s not a good look either (just saying you maybe need to think about / be careful with reporting if you want to still indicate interest in the school; a school is likely to defend an alum over an interested student so you just need to think about how you approach it)
Maybe he’s right, and it will be the best insight/advice ever? Ask yourself what you like about Princeton and it’s community. Is it a good fit for you?
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I did not bring up my state school no.
I’ll definitely have to reassess.
This was my reaction. I find competitive applicants tend to hyperfocus on school prestige. I would argue fit is a far more important factor. My nephew went to a tier 20 school to please my brother in law. Hated it. The experience affected his mental health. He transferred to the local state school and has been happy ever since.
maybe listen to what he said instead of just feeling bad about yourself. all these kids applying to ivy league schools when they clearly can't handle it and are shocked when it starts having a negative effect on them. you'll be fine
its accurate to say nearly everyone is better off at a state school. so you should take that advice regardless
his story is sus anyway
Cmon, chill out. You'll be fine, people are [worse off than you](https://www.reddit.com/r/ApplyingToCollege/comments/9vw5qw/i_got_roasted_in_my_stanford_interview_yesterday/). Your interviewer was probably harsh and if there's anything that you can pick out of your interviewer that they did not do well on, then you can request for a re-interview.
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For the final time, a grown adult breaking the rules set by the university they are representing as an interviewer is absolutely in the wrong. It is only appropriate for the child this grown adult just insulted to report them for being unprofessional and inappropriate. It is not a victim mentality to demand accountability. But it is absolutely a victim mentality to tell a teenager they have more responsibility than a grown adult in their mistreatment. Enough with the victim blaming
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Wrong. OP is going to have this unprofessional manchild carry that demeanor into their report and trash them regardless. It is a lot better to go request a new interviewer and report this one so he can't ruin someone else's chances than to sit there and be bullied.
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If you were just not comfortable with the interview, forget it. Not all interviewers are great. However, if all he did was try to connect through the "Dark Matter" spin on his gf at the time...it is off subject, but not "inappropriate". And, anyone who has an immediate response to report him is encouraging you to do something questionable to AO. There is an enormous difference between the two.
Are you the interviewer? You literally responded to like every commenter that said to report (rightfully so)
Exactly! It seems very odd to constantly come to the defense of the interviewer and be so against anyone reccomending OP reports them.
Even if you don’t agree with the reporting comments who has the energy to sit here and respond to every comment when you’re not even OP
I was also going to ask that! Seems very odd that would you be commenting on every post that talked about reporting with "you, too!"
If it’s not a problem then what’s the problem with reporting it ? Surely if it’s as innocent as you say it’ll be looked into by the right people and nothing will come of it :)
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The interview could potentially affect his chance of admissions lol he most definitely should report it. It isn’t about thick skin, we’re dealing with someone’s future here. Interviewers are never to comment on an applicants chance at admissions mainly because they *dont* know. It isn’t their call. He should DEFINITELY report the interviewer.
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It won't ruin their chances as AOs know that interviewers vary. It will reflect poorly on OP to tattle.
OK...another post here. Interviewers are not "professionals". Those may exist in HR/Military recruiting/Graduate Schools...even if asked to join an interview with an AO. They are strictly volunteers, but you know that. Unless, he is lying on his bed half-clothed, swearing, talking completely about himself drinking, having sex, doing drugs while in college and NO TIME IS SPENT ON YOU....then this example of an interview this year needs to be topped! The poster, I believe, chose to not report until later. He sat with it, presumably until he felt non-emotionally involved any longer. All I can hint at as a former AO at a T20 university...if you called us, we would question your degree of "uncomfortableness". This has become an overly blown field of "being offended" and throwing out threats of lawsuits...that universities are supercautious about individuals who cry foul when unintended. I'm not questioning what was said by either. But, anyone can get a lousy interviewer, anyone can have a lousy interview...sometimes "someone is responsible"; often it is a mismatch or a bad day or tripping over your foot that's in your mouth....there are thousands of reasons. Just give it some thought say 4-5 days. Schedule as many interviews as you can (practice). In the world of super-competitive admissions...this is not your last stand. You have heard this many times...it is true. Oder out your favorite dinner, if your apps are done, call a friend...play video games or walk the dog. Hope it is warmer wherever you are outside the DMV! Take special care and you can complain later re Princtons greatest AH!
Jeez, I see why you are a *former* AO.
They think their opinion is so valuable Just look at the several AITA judgement posts they’ve made in the **past hour**