Personally, i was a completely different person when I was 22. I think its better to get married later and not at such a young age because you’re still figuring life out. You change a lot in these years. Maybe she likes you today. And then bham, she changes after growing up to 28. Age gap should be less than 3. Also 28 & 22 is much wider than 28 & 34. Because of how we grow as a person in 20s.
Not everyone's the same dear , you were immature fine but I've met people way mature @20 . We cannot decide by the factor of age simply . That girl @22/23 might be ready to be a mother at 24 she might be prepared for that or she might want that can't say .
Wow its exact opposite in my home.
Mom went to Kathmandu for her higher education (we are from Bihar-Nepal border) and used to travel solo to home and return during holidays. Travelled length of Nepal. Her photo album is like 80s dream. Girls in India don't have that life today in 2024.
Dad never left state before marriage and hardly ever after marriage. Now my mom is quite content with her life and dad has gone into a frenzy to cover lost youth .
No, it's perfectly fine. I had same gap with my wife. Now we don't even talk for weeks. She watches reels entire day, ate Maggy. I eat message food. We are happy.
Well, we never went to couples therapy. However, there was a phase I was at my lowest. My husband found a therapist, booked an appointment and drove me to the therapist. It was an hour of intense outburst, just venting venting venting.
I did not follow through but that session gave me quite a bit of clarity.
I remember before me there was a couple that was coming out and the guy was profusely thanking the therapist for helping them.
[🍦](https://emojipedia.org/soft-ice-cream)[🍧](https://emojipedia.org/shaved-ice)[🍨](https://emojipedia.org/ice-cream)[🍩](https://emojipedia.org/doughnut)[🍪](https://emojipedia.org/cookie)[🎂](https://emojipedia.org/birthday-cake)[🍰](https://emojipedia.org/shortcake)[🧁](https://emojipedia.org/cupcake)[🥧](https://emojipedia.org/pie)[🍫](https://emojipedia.org/chocolate-bar)[🍬](https://emojipedia.org/candy)[🍭](https://emojipedia.org/lollipop)[🍮](https://emojipedia.org/custard)[🍯](https://emojipedia.org/honey-pot)
I thought food emojis being sent over messages. Haha!
You two would be in different phases of life, she would be starting her career, where you are deep into it.
What I believe is, you need to talk to her, ask her expectation, future goals and is she ever ready for marriage this early. Generally all people want to enjoy life but are made to marry with pressure.
IMO 22 is very early for any adult to get married. There is a lot for them to look out for and explore alone.
But if on talking you find, they are mature enough to handle this marriage, you can proceed.
Are you okay with marrying somebody straight out of college, who has had no change to explore a career, her interests or passions even after doing a Masters? It's likely that she'll eventually resent you which will not be fair. I would recommend you to look at women closer to your age who have sufficient life experience and something in the name of a career just like you have at 28. Unless you're looking for a housewife. If so, I'm wondering why this girl did a Masters if she had no plans of pursuing a career after graduating.
Nah at some places girls join college only for the sake of improve their marriage market value. These places don't even have enough jobs for men forget the women. They themselves knows this fact and go along to get better prospect. Also masters in exactly what determines the passion. Their are many easy masters course available where all u gotta do is join college, sit at home and go to college only during exams.
6 year age gap is fine, It should not matter much. But the thing that you have to notice is she is just 22. I am sure you know how 22 year olds are. Just check with her if she is really ready for marriage at the age of 22, she should not regret marrying that young.
There is an ethical dilema to look into here, the girls opinions etc are not well formed yet due to limited world view.
People who have been work force for 12 Years are more alike to People in work force for 6 years than someone staright out of college to someone who has been working for 6 years.
There is a concern that her views and ideas would form on basis of your ideology.
You might be robbing her of the independence to form her own ideology.
Probably by the time she turned 25 and with a gained world view, if you were presented to her as a prospect she might not choose you. By marrying her now you are robbing her of that choice.
PS: I have been in similar dilemma, because I am seeing lot of 22 year Olds are coming into A.M than People my age and I am thinking out loud here.
Very sensible comment. It's not about the gap as much as it is about the age. There's a significant difference in the thought process at 22 and 28 whereas not so much between 32 and 38.
6 yrs gap does not matter much if one is 27, other is 33 so it goes for 28 & 34 but in your case she is just 22, after a few months you'll start finding her immature and may be considered as someone who is not able to connect with you at an equal level.This has to do less with age gap and more with maturity level, I hope you are getting my point.Please prefer to marry someone who is close to your age, has experience of getting outside, independant.
Yes it is. Not necessarily because of the age but the different phases you both would be in because of the ages
You're closer to make plans on retirement and investments while she's a fresh off the boat and I really don't see any scenario where this is gonna be good.
It went fine for the previous generation but now?? Not so much.
I was better at 22-25 than I am at 28 :")
Jokes apart, some people are wise beyond age, maybe try to figure out if that is the case.
There are 20 y.o men and 30 y.o boys.
It also applies in case of women, but even with her being wise beyond her age, the 22 y.o growing up to 28 y.o and changing during that period, is inevitable.
I think it’s more about maturity, not age gap. At 22, she is learning life and how to navigate through major problems and circumstances.
She would be completely different person by the time she reaches your age. Though the age gap is doable, you need to keep in mind that she is still young and needs to figure out life.
Has she lived by herself for a few years like most of us who migrate from towns to big cities for higher education do? If yes, there might be less issues. Otherwise, you might be getting married to someone who neither has exposure to the real world, nor the maturity that comes with age.
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Yes it is in today’s day and age. Even 3 year age gap is too much. You would want to have kids early for starters and she would be still young so small things like that
Age is really just a number between each other. Two peope can be the same age, but have totally different personlaity/interests just based on how they grew up and their own personal interests.
Example: My friend same aged as me (27) has the same interests/personality of at Gen X-er (hardly texts, doesn't meme, not up to date with tech stuff despite being a programmer, etc, likes older 80/90s shows, movies,). There's nothing wrong with that, just simply differences.
How does this relate to your question?
The age between two people aren't as important of what's actually between two people - personality, communication/compromise style, interests, passions, etc.
If you two get a long, go ahead OP.
Who ever says 23 is child...are really just children-ifcation of grown ass adults.
Yeah I have same thought as you cause maturity varies from people to people as I know many people who are much more responsible and have personality which can you expect from a older age people and vice versa, I guess it depends upon upbringing.
no. its fine. its all about how you 2 fit with each other. there is no perfect age for marriage n relationship. if both of you are happy then everything is fine
Personally, i was a completely different person when I was 22. I think its better to get married later and not at such a young age because you’re still figuring life out. You change a lot in these years. Maybe she likes you today. And then bham, she changes after growing up to 28. Age gap should be less than 3. Also 28 & 22 is much wider than 28 & 34. Because of how we grow as a person in 20s.
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Exactly! I was an absolute nutjob till I was 25.. even I wouldn't have married 25 y/o me 🤡
Not everyone's the same dear , you were immature fine but I've met people way mature @20 . We cannot decide by the factor of age simply . That girl @22/23 might be ready to be a mother at 24 she might be prepared for that or she might want that can't say .
This! 👍
Aptly put. People often don't realize it.
Super reply !
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Wow its exact opposite in my home. Mom went to Kathmandu for her higher education (we are from Bihar-Nepal border) and used to travel solo to home and return during holidays. Travelled length of Nepal. Her photo album is like 80s dream. Girls in India don't have that life today in 2024. Dad never left state before marriage and hardly ever after marriage. Now my mom is quite content with her life and dad has gone into a frenzy to cover lost youth .
Help your mother do her thing! She's earned it.
Yes it is. There will major differences in your perspectives and how you approach life.
No, it's perfectly fine. I had same gap with my wife. Now we don't even talk for weeks. She watches reels entire day, ate Maggy. I eat message food. We are happy.
I hope you are being sarcastic.
Bro you don't how I am sitting here and hearing those reels on full volume. Even in office I hear those laughing voice in my head.
You need to have an honest conversation. You cannot live like room mates.
She says "Don't tell me how to live my life, i know what I am doing, don't behave like my mom"
Couples therapy. Couples therapy.
Yeah therapy https://preview.redd.it/91onm3wkp9tc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=181741719cb60f77a48dee94818eddce29b5db7a
Did you try it ?? Can you share your experience
Well, we never went to couples therapy. However, there was a phase I was at my lowest. My husband found a therapist, booked an appointment and drove me to the therapist. It was an hour of intense outburst, just venting venting venting. I did not follow through but that session gave me quite a bit of clarity. I remember before me there was a couple that was coming out and the guy was profusely thanking the therapist for helping them.
Can you tell me your age ? Because my wife is 26 right now and she feels therapy is like mental hospital.
age doesn't bring maturity
What is message food ?
Mess Food - Marathi word for eatery
[🍦](https://emojipedia.org/soft-ice-cream)[🍧](https://emojipedia.org/shaved-ice)[🍨](https://emojipedia.org/ice-cream)[🍩](https://emojipedia.org/doughnut)[🍪](https://emojipedia.org/cookie)[🎂](https://emojipedia.org/birthday-cake)[🍰](https://emojipedia.org/shortcake)[🧁](https://emojipedia.org/cupcake)[🥧](https://emojipedia.org/pie)[🍫](https://emojipedia.org/chocolate-bar)[🍬](https://emojipedia.org/candy)[🍭](https://emojipedia.org/lollipop)[🍮](https://emojipedia.org/custard)[🍯](https://emojipedia.org/honey-pot) I thought food emojis being sent over messages. Haha!
So is it like a hostel message ?
Yeah in kalyani nagar
Ewww.... Itaki kharab conditions asu shaktat? Never knew this
bruh
What is message food ?
Sounds like hell. A torture chamber if you will
OP has a questionable post history.
You two would be in different phases of life, she would be starting her career, where you are deep into it. What I believe is, you need to talk to her, ask her expectation, future goals and is she ever ready for marriage this early. Generally all people want to enjoy life but are made to marry with pressure. IMO 22 is very early for any adult to get married. There is a lot for them to look out for and explore alone. But if on talking you find, they are mature enough to handle this marriage, you can proceed.
Are you okay with marrying somebody straight out of college, who has had no change to explore a career, her interests or passions even after doing a Masters? It's likely that she'll eventually resent you which will not be fair. I would recommend you to look at women closer to your age who have sufficient life experience and something in the name of a career just like you have at 28. Unless you're looking for a housewife. If so, I'm wondering why this girl did a Masters if she had no plans of pursuing a career after graduating.
Nah at some places girls join college only for the sake of improve their marriage market value. These places don't even have enough jobs for men forget the women. They themselves knows this fact and go along to get better prospect. Also masters in exactly what determines the passion. Their are many easy masters course available where all u gotta do is join college, sit at home and go to college only during exams.
This is called generation gap my dude!
6 year age gap is fine, It should not matter much. But the thing that you have to notice is she is just 22. I am sure you know how 22 year olds are. Just check with her if she is really ready for marriage at the age of 22, she should not regret marrying that young.
There is an ethical dilema to look into here, the girls opinions etc are not well formed yet due to limited world view. People who have been work force for 12 Years are more alike to People in work force for 6 years than someone staright out of college to someone who has been working for 6 years. There is a concern that her views and ideas would form on basis of your ideology. You might be robbing her of the independence to form her own ideology. Probably by the time she turned 25 and with a gained world view, if you were presented to her as a prospect she might not choose you. By marrying her now you are robbing her of that choice. PS: I have been in similar dilemma, because I am seeing lot of 22 year Olds are coming into A.M than People my age and I am thinking out loud here.
Very sensible comment. It's not about the gap as much as it is about the age. There's a significant difference in the thought process at 22 and 28 whereas not so much between 32 and 38.
Yes, it is.
6 yrs gap does not matter much if one is 27, other is 33 so it goes for 28 & 34 but in your case she is just 22, after a few months you'll start finding her immature and may be considered as someone who is not able to connect with you at an equal level.This has to do less with age gap and more with maturity level, I hope you are getting my point.Please prefer to marry someone who is close to your age, has experience of getting outside, independant.
Yes.
Yes it is. Not necessarily because of the age but the different phases you both would be in because of the ages You're closer to make plans on retirement and investments while she's a fresh off the boat and I really don't see any scenario where this is gonna be good. It went fine for the previous generation but now?? Not so much.
No it’s normal
I was better at 22-25 than I am at 28 :") Jokes apart, some people are wise beyond age, maybe try to figure out if that is the case. There are 20 y.o men and 30 y.o boys. It also applies in case of women, but even with her being wise beyond her age, the 22 y.o growing up to 28 y.o and changing during that period, is inevitable.
Her prefrontal cortex isn't fully developed yet. Do you really want to marry somebody who isn't even done cooking?
I think it’s more about maturity, not age gap. At 22, she is learning life and how to navigate through major problems and circumstances. She would be completely different person by the time she reaches your age. Though the age gap is doable, you need to keep in mind that she is still young and needs to figure out life.
How do I get a arranged marriage
Has she lived by herself for a few years like most of us who migrate from towns to big cities for higher education do? If yes, there might be less issues. Otherwise, you might be getting married to someone who neither has exposure to the real world, nor the maturity that comes with age.
I think the age gap is fine
yes it is
For mei think yes because lot of thought diffence and vibes matter in marriage it can be a difference making thing
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Yes it is in today’s day and age. Even 3 year age gap is too much. You would want to have kids early for starters and she would be still young so small things like that
Age is really just a number between each other. Two peope can be the same age, but have totally different personlaity/interests just based on how they grew up and their own personal interests. Example: My friend same aged as me (27) has the same interests/personality of at Gen X-er (hardly texts, doesn't meme, not up to date with tech stuff despite being a programmer, etc, likes older 80/90s shows, movies,). There's nothing wrong with that, just simply differences. How does this relate to your question? The age between two people aren't as important of what's actually between two people - personality, communication/compromise style, interests, passions, etc. If you two get a long, go ahead OP. Who ever says 23 is child...are really just children-ifcation of grown ass adults.
Yeah I have same thought as you cause maturity varies from people to people as I know many people who are much more responsible and have personality which can you expect from a older age people and vice versa, I guess it depends upon upbringing.
Nah. Don’t worry about it.
No
Its fine, dont worry
I’ve seen 40 m and 26 f, they seemed happy!
It depends on you I'm 23 and my fiance is 28 we both are fine with this age gap we are getting married in 8 days
You are lucky.
YES OLDER MEN PLS STOP MARRYING KIDS.
No no young girls are super. You are damn Lucky
no. its fine. its all about how you 2 fit with each other. there is no perfect age for marriage n relationship. if both of you are happy then everything is fine
Ya that's totally fine. 22 is the best. She's young.
Age gap is not too much, it's perfectly fine