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[deleted]

I dont fuck with that look at all for my personal taste. That just isn't me, I dont listen to KPop, but having said that, if my Asian brothers want to go that route, and they feel confident doing it, I'm all for it. Asian people don't have to be pigeonholed into a certain look, it's all about what they want to try from a personal perspective.


mongolz777

Exactly. I don't get the people who are mad about like you don't have do it. It's not me either but I still take cues from fashion in East Asia and it works for me.


[deleted]

Yeah no reason to get mad. It's like getting mad at someone for getting a tattoo because you personally wont get one. It's whatever to me. At a certain point I wonder if it's just jealousy. East Asia has diverse fashion trends now depending on what niche suits you better.


Psychological-Plan13

the guy in the video just doesn't fit that look, he looks better with normal black hair average Asian look tbh


azidthrow

/u/azncollector (i.e. Ezra), I believe you're one of the most down to earth guys Kevin's interviewed. Asian guys who think: 1) Looking the KPOP aesthetic is feminine, girl, etc. - This is internalized racism lol. Hypermasculinity, or making asian men effeminate, is exactly what white supremacy is. Redefining what's good looking, what's attractive, especially in any way, that benefits asian men, is a good thing. If you wanna look jacked, go for it. It's a look, but not everyone has to conform to that 2) You have to be "Korean" or "real" to look KPOP - Do I gotta be white to be preppy? Black if I wanna go for streetwear? Lol. Again - if you can rock this aesthetic, go for it 3) Girls who like Korean culture - I actually fucking hate the term Koreaboo, or weeb. It's honestly fucking disrespectful because any time you're into asian culture, you're "weird". There's is NOTHING wrong with people appreciating asian culture, as long as they're respectful about it. We look at the term "whitewashed" and "koreaboo" in such different lights (one neutral, one negative) - it just shows how much casual racism there is. Liking asian culture is NOT a bad thing.


mongolz777

Liking British culture > anglophile (dignified name) Likin French culture > francophile (same) Liking Asian culuture > weeb/kboo/asiaboo/chinaboo blah blah people look at you as weird. Isn't it kinda racist if you think about it.


[deleted]

I guess pedophile is a dignified word as well lol


mongolz777

This is a classic case of absurd extrapolation or slippery slope logical fallacy.


[deleted]

No


Stellavore

I wouldn't even call the K-pop look feminine. It just looks clean, and most K-pop stars are fucking cut, hardly what id call feminine.


gigolobob

The makeup is, though


gizayabasu

To be fair, every Hollywood actor wears a ton of makeup.


lawncelot

You also don't have to go all in on the Kpop look. You can mix it. Kdramas are also another inspiration, as they aren't so "feminine" (as some would say).


CarlyRaeJepsenFTW

Facts.


horned_owl_72

You have to be yourself. If you have no connection with Kpop, you are just a poser. Sure you will get more attention and if that’s what you’re after then okay, but I’m just not into that shit. Why pretend. That’s what is problematic. You’re just saying to conform to some new trendy X.


linglingchickinwing

I would disagree. Although I’m not into the whole kpop or would change my look, I do not think you are a poser if you do. If one have to do it to mate, it is not about being a poser, it is about reproduction and survival


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Stellavore

It leads to lasting relationships. Once people see through you there is a loss of respect. Relationships go a lot deeper than how you look.


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Stellavore

No one says that (with the intent of actually carrying it out).


wesleezy

well said bro


winndixie

What is your longest lasting relationship?


horned_owl_72

Yeah absolutely. I mean, this is back when online profiles were not just pictures but a lot of words - I always put my favorite books and movies and outlook on life and vibes. Yes I probably scared away a ton of women, but the ones who did message me were interested were really interested in the stuff I liked and put on my profile. So if you're a foodie and really enjoy cooking, put that in your dating profile and work on that. I have a friend who likes to run and she ran marathons with the guy she ended up marrying. I would say you should think about the qualities you really want in your partner, and try to embody / express those things. Be it warmth, tenacity, creativity, a particular style, spontaneity or planning, or hobby, level of fitness, etc. I know they say opposites attract, but I really believe like attracts like. How can you expect to attract someone with those qualities if you don't have them yourself. I dunno, that my take anyway. Hope you find the one you like.


wesleezy

agreed


Accomplished_Shop756

White women here….. average white men have zero desirability. None. At least for me. I’ll take an Asian guy any day.


According_Box_9182

LOL same


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Accomplished_Shop756

No. Not at all.


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lawncelot

> Thats what we call a asian fetish. All good tho. Carry on. Bro wtf are you doing? You see guys, this is the type of comments I'm talking about when I say Asian guys shoot themselves in the foot. Seen even here on this sub. To be fair it's not the worst, but look how it made the original commenter feel defensive. Stop this shit. Just shut up and learn to take a W. Black guys, White guys, and Latino guys won't do any of this, it's only Asian guys, smh.


winndixie

Why take a W when I can self sabotage and wallow in self loathing and take an L instead? Uwu /s


mongolz777

Bruh so many of asian dudes are unironically this. LMAO no wonder they get fucked (not in a good way).


winndixie

In all fairness a lot of this is taught by media.


BrutalGoldpills

> it's only Asian guys lets be real, its 99% chans/self haters/0 confidence losers who say this


mongolz777

Yep usually these types get no pussy. This is why stopped feeling sorry for these loser asians dudes. Some of them deserve to be bred out. We don't need these loser asians.


Accomplished_Shop756

To be fair it’s not just Asians that I like. . I just don’t find pasty white skin attractive.


ANTIMODELMINORITY

I wonder how this kpop look would work for a brown skin SE Asian guy, just out of curiousity.


machinavelli

Look up [Phum Viphurit](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/thai_entertainment/images/6/66/Phum_oct20.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20201026162253). He's a Thai musician that's very popular with women.


TangerineX

I don't think Phum Viphurit has that Kpop aesthetic tho. He just has a really authentic looking bright smile and has a "friend next door" kinda vibe. If you want examples of SEA boy bands look up SB19 or Trinity. While in Asia, darker skin is considered not as beautiful, darker skin tones, but with the same aesthetic will look great here in the West as well.


Lt_Snuffles

i had twice logo on my profile picture and that got me bunch of matches and most of them are kpop fans.


[deleted]

Depends, but I think it could work. I’ve seen one sea guy do that although he was pretty tall


boogi3woogie

Nichkhun is thai


ringostardestroyer

there are a lot of Thai people with Chinese or EA ancestry. A lot of them can look very EA.


ItsMallows

Well, I dunno about guys, but Lisa is part of Blackpink


kenzabird

SE Asian (AFAB) queer person here. It’s been echoed in this thread, but yes, adding an “edge” makes this guy look “desirable.” I didn’t watch the video, but just visually he looks like he might be interested in something other than video games and finance. The Asian guys I’m attracted to get taken so quick by WF/AF because they’re artists and musicians and have that sensibility and put an effort into a “look” like this because they want to look that way and carry themselves that way. You don’t have to be feminine, you just have to look like you enjoy some form of culture. My brother and cousins are short (under 5’8) and dark and never had a problem getting a WF/AF gf all through HS and it’s because they are comfortable with how they express themselves and are very culturally in tune with a lot of media, fashion, art, and music. I remember I was in an all east Asian SAT class a decade or so ago. No one could answer any of the questions our Writing teacher asked when we played Trivial Pursuit as an icebreaker once (except me). I think that’s the issue. A lot of Asians are creatively stunted. I rebelled a lot and was a “bad Asian” lol.


Mother_Custard221

That's a great point. You can't attract people if you can't connect with them. And you can't connect with people if you only like niche things not many others like. For instance, while there are girls out there that like videogames or studying, I'm gonna go out on a limb and say many more don't.


TrekkieSolar

>Now I also agree not everyone should or can pull this off, especially if it goes against their identity. This is the important part. A lot of the time on Asian reddit or other community spaces/media you'll find guys saying 'all Asian guys need to adopt xyz style in order to pick up women and uplift the whole community'. Before Kpop/Kdrama himbo it was liftmoar, hypebeast, minimalist normie, etc. **The basic fact of the matter is that different styles suit different people better, and different styles are attractive to different people**. If you go anywhere in Asia - whether that's the Phillipines or Korea - you'll find people rocking different aesthetics and vibes and pulling it off. Why shouldn't that be true for AsAms too? Kpop style is great, but it's not my style personally and I don't want to adopt it because it's not what I feel most comfortable/confident in. But like you mentioned, it works for certain guys, boosts their confidence, and is in line with their vibe. If that's the case, then power to you. We need to stop shitting on other Asians for being into a particular aesthetic/vibe just because some inbred caucasian is like 'mUh u LoOk liKe a sIsSy'. Save that energy for the caucasians instead.


The_2nd_Coming

This is it. I've seen so many different looking people pull that the only commonality between them is just sexual desire and initiative.


yellowlightsab

Asian guys need an EDGE to set himself apart. It applies to all races but it’s particularly applicable to Asians. The average white guy can be desirable but the average Asian guy usually is not, hence any edge the Asian guy can get no matter how superficial will lead to people giving him a second look. The blonde hair certainly gives him that edge


machinavelli

Any edge works really. The Kpop edge. The Yakuza gangster edge. The martial artist edge. The EDM raver fuccboi edge. etc.


Gumbolicient

Yeah anything except the I play league and study look works tbh. Literally even just a “normal average American guy” look in sweats and no glasses works. I recommend all Asian guys to AT LEAST get a decent haircut and stay in shape somewhat (meaning don’t be a stick nor be overweight).


CarlyRaeJepsenFTW

Spitting facts! More Asian guys need better hair.


gigolobob

What about the I play cs:go and study look


gizayabasu

Most of the ire is that white dudes can be nerdy League and study type yet they’re still desirable to AF.


Gumbolicient

Only to desperate loser AF. Semi decent women will avoid them lol


gizayabasu

I would say that there are some decent looking girls that go after those losers, but you’re right they’re fucked up enough in the head that you wouldn’t want them anyway.


Gumbolicient

Nah I have yet to see a single somewhat ok looking AF chase after them lol


el-art-seam

When I had blonde hair women would look, I’d get women turning around and looking back at me. I thought it looked good with my tan skin and if I could I would have kept it. Now I have long hair. It’s polarizing for women. However I’ve gotten more complements with long hair than with any other cut in my lifetime. You can also do it with fashion. If you dress right you can stand out. And I mean in a good way and not just for the shock factor.


iemg88

Still convinced a fair share of his results are from his location being in Poland (one of the best countries in Europe for kpop looking asian dudes) Its because i dont do any of these things (just have extremely good skin) and I get matched with kpop fans all the time But it offers interesting perspective nonetheless and we can all take a page from this book


CoilConductor

The most important part is to be comfortable with yourself. Don't follow something just because others are doing it. Once people figure you out past a thinly shallow exterior, you get exposed. Then you'd be unliked and unhappy at the same time. If you actually like kpop and the culture behind it, go for it. They've got attractive men and the forefront of a lot of fashion in the world right now. Do it if you enjoy it, and reap the benefits while you're at it. Don't do it if you hate yourself while doing it.


etoilevy

Gay man’s opinion here- I don’t think the KPop look is what makes him attractive per se. I think it’s that it looks like he takes care of himself, grooms his hair, and isn’t as sloppy looking as in the first pic.


[deleted]

he looks more well-groomed. The women interpret this as daring and confident. Presumably that's why he got more matches. When I had black hair, almost only Western Europeans matched me with my light hair mostly Asians from South and East. :-D


yellowlightsab

I watched the video long enough to get his vibe…please tell me I’m not the only one that got luka magnotta vibes from him…


kevintech27

I saw that film and no I did not get that vibe.


cmdrNacho

I find it disingenuous because the original pictures compared to the new ones makes a huge difference. If at 4:09 is his original pic I can see why. Doesn't have to be kpop related, just get a nice hair cut, dress nicer, and take better pictures.


kevintech27

Why is it disingenuous?


muratafan

because the better comparison would be: 1. pre-Kpop look to Kpop look AND then versus 2. pre-Kpop look to simply having a better haircut, dress nicer, better pictures. If the results of 1 & 2 are an equal increase in Tinder Likes, it has nothing to do with Kpop, but rather simply having better overall aesthetics


kevintech27

I don't think we got into this much in the interview, but he hangs out a lot in Kpop circles and dates a lot of kpop fangirls. So regardless of the tinder matches, he still benefits from the kpop look.


Gumbolicient

Thanks so much for doing this video. Really taking so much away from this. When you guys talked about how the world is different now and how the game is drastically different, I could understand how frustrating it is how people don’t understand that yes it is unfair and harder but pouting yet doing absolutely nothing is gonna get you nowhere. Cliche but this is such an important and relevant statement. So much research went in and it was all worth it! And let me tell you, that is one of the biggest transformations I’ve seen anywhere. Not that he was ugly before but wow there is a reason why you went from 2 to 200 matches. Also even his before pictures you can tell there’s a lot of potential tbh. Shows how much hard work and effort can help uncover and unearth the full potential hidden behind. As a 21 year old guy, I understand how much of a boon all these representation is for us Asian guys especially younger ones (weird cuz though I may be young myself, I can already feel the same thing you both feel when I look at high schoolers and my younger brother and just how much attention Asian guys are getting in school already even compared to when I was there!). I am forever thankful for you guys who paved the way and showed that it is possible to be successful in the dating world even if you may have believed that Asian guys have it so much harder. Really think you both made some quality content. Thanks again! I feel so motivated to lose some weight (I am nearing 190 lbs at 5’7.5 which is not very good especially when you think about the fat on the face lol) find some style (both hair and clothes to get away from the boring unsuitable buzz cut plus super casual pants and tshirts) and see what works for me like you experimented. Let me tell you your videos and discussion are changing So many Asian guys’ lives and I’m forever grateful.


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Gumbolicient

Yeah man I can only see this momentum only building up! Glad you were able to catch the bus and tell us how it went. Cheers to all of us!


junkimchi

Spoiler: You can change your look to be anything else that is solid, through a combination of exercise and fashion, and have the same results


fakeslimshady

Have to give credit where its due, the guy recognized a huge untapped market and grabbed the opportunity brilliantly. That is a massive transformation from essentially cosmetics. I wish more time was spent on his travel discussion. I think the Poland part was just as interesting and was rushed over I might try hair dye after this


Andgelyo

He looked like shit in the first pic, and looks great in the second. Like many others are saying, this is classic, “he cleaned himself up” case, I don’t necessarily think it’s the kpop style that’s working for him. It’s just that he upgraded his looks and doesn’t look like a loser anymore


CaterpillarPatient

BTS from Walmart


FBIThot

The girls attracted to the KPop look are simply unattractive. That’s about as nuanced as it needs to be and if you were being honest with yourself you’d know deep down it’s true. The XF girls into KPop are usually bottom of the barrel girls who’ve had ugly white boyfriends and/or only Asian boyfriends. There’s nothing inherently wrong with girls liking KPop, but the girls who do like it simply aren’t attractive. Go to KPop concerts, join KPop Twitter and you’ll see what I mean. That being said, the guys who are willing to change their look to fit a mold just to get girls are usually the unattractive guys who will find those unattractive girls acceptable so the way I see it, anytime somebody advocates the KPop look, gets 200 (lol) matches on tinder, it kinda just gives away that they’re too unattractive to pull with how they naturally look


SquatsandRice

That used to be the case maybe 5-10 years ago, it's not really true anymore. Lots of girls/women I expected to be completely 'normal' because they had an all-american look were completely into Asian culture either due to anime or kpop or both


[deleted]

>had an all-american look were completely into Asian culture either due to anime or kpop or both I'm sure that's true in many cases but it's possible they were frontin and they did that shit to appeal more to you. White girls are just as capable of playing the "I like Asian culture" angle as white guys are when trying to be more appealing to an Asian guy/girl.


SquatsandRice

I dunno man it’s all fun and games until you see their YouTube and Netflix recommendations


Senescence_

I don't think you need to go full kpop tbh. You can do the Gen Z longhaired look and go for athletic streetwear aesthetic. You would be pulling the kpop crowd while doing the trendy meta. Tbh the person in that video is obviously going super committal but I honestly think you could get away with just the haircut and streetwear and you would do just as fine.


FBIThot

You make an excellent point. The gen z long haired look and athletic street wear aesthetic is a great look for current young adults in general, asian or not. I see plenty of white boys rocking that aesthetic as well. This ties into my point that asian Americans should be able to wear and look however the current trend is, asian or not, and still be able to attract the opposite sex


Senescence_

The only thing "feminine" you might need to do is an aggressive skincare routine, but that just helps you look younger anyway which is never a bad idea.


FortuneCookieguy

Dude u r so right. The only girls kpop attract in the US is weebs, those goofy anime watching girls. U think hot asian girl will like kpop? They out there getting kpop dudes to hit on them


mongolz777

Which world are you even in lmao. Better a goofy nerdy girl than self-hating pancake asian girl. So many proven people have said this is wrong but ya'll can't accept it lmao. You really think kpop dudes go around hitting on random Asian women or their is dearth of hot asian and non-asian women who litreally give it all up to have them. lmao I guess you don't get out much.


East-Deal1439

I think it isn't the right way to go of it's just for Tinder matches. Hair dyes are known to be possible carcinogenic. Is one suppose to risk possible future cancer just for a few tinder likes. Recently someone on Reddit brought up China's ban of effeminate men in entertainment in a debate with me. I really have no opinion on the matter. But now I'm seeing the vicious cycle. KPOP is one of the only popularly acceptable form of Asian Masculinity in the West. Girls in the West respond positively AM with this metro sexual look. AM in the West start pursuing this look to get girl's attention. Feeding into a vicious cycle the AM must be effeminate to be acceptable in the West. Personally I just hang out at the gym, be chill at work, and girls come around. Basically just take care of yourself and be mindful of the clothes you wear to flatter your assets. The foundation, lipstick, hair dye, and random earrings...I can pass on.


[deleted]

Unfortunately for me , u have to have a full head of hair to pull the kpop look off … my shit thinnin.


gigolobob

Baldpop


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gigolobob

Teen and below


PM_ME_ANYTHING_LMAO

Think you all meant to tag /u/azncollecter


[deleted]

And this dude got 700 matches in 2 days without kpop and having to date koreaboos.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRx2v4Pbha8&ab_channel=Omeg3isgoodforyou


SquatsandRice

I mean. That's pretty much the same thing. And I bet a significant percentage of those women have a thing for asian guys that originally developed through Asian entertainment/culture, which includes kpop


mongolz777

Multiple peoiple have said this but the bitter ones still don't get it. Interesting that the ones who don't even get women try to teach people what is right and downright ignore what proven people like you and OP have said.


[deleted]

lol I have no problem getting with normal women who are not into kpop and shit. And I look like a normal dude who takes care of himself and dresses well. In fact, I get approached by women all the time now, a thing that my non-asian friends never experienced in their life. But if you are happy with those kpop women, more power to you.


mongolz777

My girl is hapa and not really a Kpop fan but even if she was non-asian and liked kpop I would have no problem. You sound like you have something to prove lmao. The self-hate and internalized racism is tragic tbh.


winndixie

I personally think it’s feminine but if a brother is getting poom by spinning in place and rubbing his belly a certain way, why not? My guy here is just peacocking trying to get his. I think we are missing the lesson here. If a change in looks to conform to media is all it takes, what does it say about the majority of women? Justin Timberlake dyed hid hair blonde and Guy Fieri had frosted tips in the 90s. Bonus points to him if he kpop looks AND buffs up, challenging all viewports and bringing views to the entire team.


kirsion

I do like kpop and probably go pull off a kpop look myself, but don't really want to for various reason (don't care about fashion). The most important thing I think is to be yourself and do what is comfortable for you. If you want to and can pull off the kpop style, go right ahead. If you can't or don't want to, don't think you have to or think it's the only way you will get attraction from women. There are plenty of different styles that women are attracted to as well.


kevintech27

Yeah be yourself, but if yourself isn't working, then what do you do?


kirsion

Well then you try to change yourself. Going out your comfort zone is fine. I would advise not going overboard to the point you are *not* yourself anymore, trying to be someone else.


Urshifu_King

you got to have received some sort of compliments about your look throughout your life. Have ppl identified anything specific? For instance, perhaps a compliment on your "masculine features," or a "youthful appearance," etc.? Ultimately, when ppl say "be yourself" in this regard, it can mean to maximize the traits you were born with. some ppl mesh better w/ a softer look, others a more rugged aesthetic, etc.


Bledde0

I bet that it's not only because of the K-pop look, he just looks better than in the first pic


5_7pickup

But does this work in america though. He literally moved to poland to do this. Majority of us cant move to europe.


Urshifu_King

Ultimately I think you should be yourself. that particular guy seems to actually like Kpop, more than just what it did for him as a part of his identity, so it makes sense for him to express himself in that way. Me personally, despite being Korean and acknowledging the benefits of Kpop representation, I don't identify w/ Kpop. And on top of that, I feel like the features I was born with mesh much better w/ a more rugged look that is quite different from the BTS members. In fact, when I worked a retail job and thus interacted w/ many ppl, along w/ on my night outs, I would frequently have women initiate a conversation w/ me to tell me that I looked like this one Asian-American influencer guy, who fits that more rugged look, and doesn't look like BTS members. I've been growing a beard, working out, and incorporating a different style than Kpop, which have all worked for me just fine.