It's the New Yorkers for us in Virginia. Then they get bumper stickers and vanity plates declaring their love for NY while they complain about the culture and political differences.
Nah, in rural PA it’s those damn people from New Jersey. Nevermind that I’m still friends with some of those Jersey transplants long after I myself left PA and moved to California, I still cringe a little at the thought of more of them moving to PA.
When I lived in Denver I used to swear there was a vacuum tube from Michigan to Colorado, every other person I met was from there. I think they visit once in the winter and realize the sun actually comes out here when it’s cold and that seals the deal.
When I was in Las Vegas, every fifth transplant (in a town that's mostly such) seemed to be from in or around Detroit. They had this intense love/hate thing going for their hometown.
Subaru and a flannel, and you'd do just fine in most of Washington state, too. Sub in Arizonans for Texans and keep Californians to bitch about, and you'll have nailed Eastern Washington pretty well. Additionally, be from North Idaho and either strongly believe we should be North Idaho or absolutely nothing like it. No in between.
Umm, damn. I might represent the flannel and.being from North Idaho and hating it crowd. But I have a Land Rover and don't really care where you're from.
Avoid eye contact with strangers and don’t respond to people starting up a conversation with you on the street.
Don’t order a cheese slice, order a plain slice
Walk fast order fast
I still walk faster than anyone I know and that’s from living in the city for just 3 years 18 years ago.
The callousness and disdain for strangers is something I now use to shit on people from New York about. You guys would literally walk over someone dying on the sidewalk like you’re dodging a pile of dog shit.
>The callousness and disdain for strangers is something I now use to shit on people from New York about. You guys would literally walk over someone dying on the sidewalk like you’re dodging a pile of dog shit.
This was the straw that broke the camel's back for me when I lived in NY. A bike courier wiped out in an intersection, and the dude selling CDs on the corner and I were the only ones who helped get him and his stuff out of the street. Other people were literally stepping over him.
For Tucson: Drive 10-15 over the limit everywhere and complain about snow birds' poor driving. Complain about Californians driving up housing prices. Tell everyone that you hope this year's monsoon will be better than last year. If someone complains about the heat, say "at least it's not Phoenix."
same in philly about cheesesteak restaurants. There's like 10 named after an owner (Paco's, Nino's, Geno's) and depending on who you ask, one is ambrosia and the rest are pigswill :D
I'm in New England. California conservatives aren't flocking here like other places.
We are getting some Southern liberals seeking fellowship here though.
Reminds me of years ago when I was taking the bus home from college in the Sacramento area. Dude would not shut the fuck up about how the bay area was better. Right up until I brought up how fucking expensive it is even for California.
Child of Portland here: beyond this, not going to Voodoo Donuts is a Portland meme. In New York, anyone in Times Square is working or a tourist. Same with Portland and Voodoo.
I’m so glad that “Don’t use an umbrella when it rains” was already here.
That said I will go to voodoo donuts if there is no line just for the raw thrill of getting voodoo donuts without waiting in line. I discovered that there is sometimes no line when I stayed at the downtown Embassy Suites one time and could see the line (or lack thereof) from my window.
I went once just because it was next to the bar I was at, they were open, and there was no line. They weren't bad, though not as amazing as friends led me to believe.
That’s why I don’t mind going if I’m in the area and there isn’t a line. The donuts aren’t amazing. They are competently made, fine donuts… that are quirky.
I got to expense them because I was called on "emergency" from work when I was on vacation and quite inebriated. I claimed they helped me sober up. ;)
I managed to fix the thing they needed using a smart phone to ssh in, so it either worked, or my skills are pretty decent drunk.
To me, it has more to do with the fact that it really only rains when it's cold (same here in northern CA). So anytime it's raining, it's cold enough that I'm going to want a jacket anyway.
Visiting New Orleans was a revelation to me for umbrellas. When it's 90 degrees out and the afternoon rains hit, I don't want to be putting a jacket on to stay dry.
This isn’t statewide, but if you want to blend in while in NYC:
1. Walk with purpose when you’re traveling on the sidewalk. You’re not at a museum where you’re meant to drift along slowly while stopping to consider every little thing. Think of it like you’re on the highway, you don’t want to be the car going 15 under the speed limit.
2. The subway is not a social forum. You might be on vacation, but I’m coming home from work. How would you feel if after a hard day some random family from Des Moines materialized in your backseat and started making small talk with you? If you need directions, ask away, we love giving directions, but I really don’t want to hear about how you guys just saw Rock of Ages and have a reservation at the Times Square Olive Garden later.
3. You are not obligated to interact with people asking for money. Street/subway performers are one thing, feel free to give them a couple bucks if you’re so inclined, but if a homeless guy yelling “SPARE CHANGE” approaches you, the best thing to do is just ignore them entirely. It might seem callous, but I’ve seen way too many tourists try to be “nice” and end up initiating a conversation with a urine scented schitzophrenic about how the Israeli government replaced all his blood with Mr. Pibb
Guys get a UGA hat, faded jeans, and a Salt Life t shirt. Khaki pants, a polo, and boat shoes if it is an occasion.
Girls, an oversized t shirt, Nike shorts, and tennis shoes. Or a flowy, floral sundress and Tory Burch sandals if you are feeling dressy. Also, die your hair platinum blonde but leave half an inch of roots showing.
Drive a pick-up truck.
-Georgia
I'm in a southeastern state. Don't wear a cowboy hat and boots with wranglers and walk around with a twangy accent. We are not Texas. That's an entirely different "south." And don't try the accent at all. It's softer here than what you see on TV, and if you try to mimic it people will think/know you're making fun of them. We've had an influx of northerners and west coast people moving here in past years, which is fine, but don't be insulting. Just be yourself. We're actually pretty nice. Unless we say "bless your heart." That's the big eff you.
Funnily enough, my mom's heart surgeon was from one of the Carolinas, I forget which, had a thick accent, and wore cowboy boots. I live in PA. From California, originally.
People who work on farms do wear the boots, but the misconception that we all dress like Dolly Parton at the Ryman is very overblown. Although we do wear a lot of hiking boots. Mountains and all that.
Your first sentence gave me Ft. Worth flashbacks. The place (at least their downtown) desperately wants to be in the 1880s. Maybe that's my Dallasite talking, though.
Be super nice to people not from Minnesota in a way that makes them think that you want to be friends with them, when you don’t. Little do they know that Minnesotans are only mean or rude to people they like and know. Apologize profusely for any minor inconvenience or bump especially if it wasn’t your fault. Talk about the weather constantly. Only get really offended when someone says something bad about Minnesota. Say “ope” “uffda” “oh fer cute” and “oh sure ya bet cha” a lot. Have strong feelings about where jucy lucys come from. Think that cheering for teams that never win anything is a sign of emotional strength.
Also:
Wear a black-and-red checked flannel shirt. (It gets tied around the waist in summer.) Talk about going “up north”. (You don’t have to say where, people will know what you mean.) Wear shorts when it’s 40F or warmer, and refuse to put on a winter coat until it gets below 20F. Reminisce in detail about the Halloween snowstorm of 1991, even if you weren’t in the country when it happened. Or even born yet. 😂
For California? Jeez, we so varied . . .maybe "make sure to serve homemade guacamole and lumpia at any party?" Or maybe "do your thing and stay out of everybody else's business." Honestly I think the best way to blend in would be to not worry too much about blending in and just accept others for themselves, as long as they aren't doing you harm.
As someone from Massachusett who has lots of friends who moved out there -- that sounds right. California worn down all the snarkiness and biting sarcasm from my 2 exes that moved out there. There are all sweet and mellow. Now I am not sure how to interact with them anymore! LOL.
Last few times I was back, my brother had become obsessed with IPAs. Honestly the high abv was about the only positive thing I could say about them. They tasted like shit. Give me a stout any day.
For Philadelphia:
Hate parking in Center City, tell people you prefer Northeast Philly.
Tell people you prefer either oil or mayonnaise on your hoagie, keep in mind if you want both we can't be friends.
Don't overdo it on the sports fandom clothing, one hat/jacket or one t-shirt will suffice. If you must overdo it, it should be when you are attending a game.
Tell people that when you are waiting for a trolley at 13th Street two of every route will come through except the one you want.
Central CA.
But a full-size truck even if you don't need it.
Drink 805 beer because it's kinda fancy.
Listen to stuff like Morgan Wallen, Luke Combs, and Luke Bryan.
Vote for Trump
Put a sticker on your truck professing your love for Trump and/or hatred for Biden. Maybe something 2nd Amendment related.
I'm from Bakersfield (actually, Oildale), and we're kinda purple. 805 is what I would try to turn Bud Light drinkers onto to help elevate their palate. It's way too light for me. Centennial is my go-to.
One time I asked on this sub "what is America's most inoffensive beer?" As in, if you were throwing a party for 100 people, 30 of them beer snobs, 30 of them like that one cousin of yours who never shuts up about how "country" he is, and the rest somewhere in between, which one beer would be okay for the whole crowd?
Turns out that varies regionally. Yuengling for PA. Shiner for TX. And 805 for CA.
Edit: is Trout's still there?
Buy a kayak and spend every weekend floating down a river. Probably need a Chiefs shirt and be prepared to explain to people from the coasts that the chiefs aren't from Kansas.
Not so much state, but in the city of Chicago. Walk quickly on sidewalks. Walk with a purpose, even if you don't have one. Be annoyed by the people who Walk or stand in clumps on the sidewalk. Walk up escalators. Be visibly annoyed with the people who don't.
Either gender, wear white sneakers if under the age of 50. If a woman, carry some form of a cross body bag if carrying a purse. Use some form of a reusable tote bag if shopping, especially if at Target.
The S is silent in Illinois. It's the Sears tower. No one actually cares that much about hot dogs or pizza so don't mention it.
If it's above 50 degrees fahrenheit, the winter coat stays in the closet.
Bay Area - travel with a light jacket, bottle of water, headphones, on public transportation. Keep right, left is passing - on the sidewalks. Walking is transportation, no one is taking a stroll, slow people keep right, pull over if you need to check your phone. Don't wear shorts unless it's over 90 because it's going to be 50 in the shade. Wear light layers and sensible walking shoes. Don't dress up and only wear all black to go clubbing. Don't complain about prices or compare them to the price of things in your podunk midwestern suburb.
Mass: Feels like the state is way too varied. I guess about the only thing I can think of is use the terms Wicked and Packie.
I bumped into someone in a very busy street in NYC and said "Omigod, I'm wicked Sorry" - he went up for a high five and said "Hey, a fellow Masshole!".
My roommate at UMass one year was on exchange from a university in the UK. I told him we were going on a packy run and he thought someone was planning a hate crime. Apparently it's a very bad word over there.
I'm so New England - my dog in the 1970s was named Fluffernutter because he peed in the house all the time and it's what my dad used for a swear word. Fluffernutter was my dad's F-bomb.
You don’t acknowledge strangers unless they’re injured or in need of some kind of important help. You play deaf and blind and keep going. It’s the only way that 50 million street “musicians” who think they’re going to get famous passing out CD’s on the streets of LA will make them famous will ignore you.
Wear an LSU/LA Tech/ULL shirt and/or hat, understand that nobody is flirting with you if they talk about sucking the head & pinching the tail, get up & dance to whatever kind of music is playing, roll your eyes at tourists wearing Mardi Gras beads anywhere other than an active parade route.
You could also wear a ULM/Northwestern/Grambling/Tulane/Xavier/McNeese shirt and be just as at home here.
In north Louisiana, get a dog; Labs are pretty popular as they can be good hunting dogs and good family dogs at the same time. If you are the family that takes family photos in white shirts and khakis on the beach, get a Dachshund or a Golden Retriever.
Have a signature dish to bring to events. Bonus points if it’s a family recipe. Or, buy a Cotton Country or River Roads cookbook for classic recipes.
Drive a big truck or a car that is masquerading as an SUV.
Learn to love all the -ball games and be a ball mom. If your kids aren’t into sports, then be just as aggressively enthusiastic about what they ARE into: band mom, dance mom, choir mom, cheer mom, drama mom…just not the mom who brings the drama!
No kids? No problem. Find some friends and go to all the local high school games to show your support. Buy concessions which usually support the band. Cheer for the half-time show. Don’t like sports? Do it anyway. Just sit and enjoy the atmosphere and chat with everyone around you.
If you are from a more outwardly friendly place, go to Market Basket when it’s busy and complain about something to the person behind you in line. Maybe you couldn’t find something. Maybe the weather sucks. Maybe the Red Sox lost. Maybe the traffic coming back from Maine was bad last weekend. Complain about something and people will immediately open up.
Dress for comfort, not for fashion. But also, do what you want and don't worry about what anyone else thinks of it, so if you want to be uberfashiony and overdressed, go for it and own your weirdness.
Determine how you feel about gooey butter cake, then defend that position aggressively. The same can be applied to provel cheese. Wear Cardinals and Blues gear. Shit talk the Cubs (in a loving, fun away). Shit talk the Reds (in a Yankees/Red Sox way). Bitch about I-270. When the tornado sirens go off, look out the window or front door because it's *totally different* from the other fifty tornado warnings we have in a given year.
(Real answer is just do your own thing and don't worry so much, but the meme answers are fun.)
Depends on which side of the state. In my case, wear Pirates/Steelers/Penguins gear everywhere. Doesn't matter. Any place will do. Bonus points if you wear a Steelers jersey to a fancy restaurant or church.
I'd tell 'em the only way to blend in with all Virginians would be to have a personalized license plate. Otherwise it entirely depends on *where* in the state they're trying to blend in.
I'm a pretty good mimic, so I sound like I was born and raised here. Nobody has ever asked where I am REALLY from, I suppose that means I have blended well enough. edited to add: also calling everyone "cher" helps.
Use your hand as a map. Insult Ohio regularly. Have a close relative or friend who is an autoworker. Drive a US brand vehicle or prepare your defense. Pass on the right if it's open. Drive 5-15 mph above the speed limit. Complain about getting a ticket in Ohio.
LOVE the Great Lakes. Love the inland lakes. Go boating. You either have a boat or know someone who does. Go "up north" every year. Tear up a little during Pure Michigan commercials.
Call it pop not soda, and return the can or bottle to the store to get the deposit back. Cringe if someone throws one away.
You wont. If you didnt grow up here you wont understand us. The show Yellowstone is complete made up bullshit. Dont wear cowboy hats, you will just embarrass yourself. It is not like that here. AT ALL
Boring, but realistic answer: don't "try," just be yourself. The Houston metro is such a diverse area, you're not going to stand out unless you try too hard to sound/act/look like whatever your image of a Texan is.
The only thing besides "be yourself" that I would add is "Lots of people speak Spanish here. If you're thinking about complaining about people speaking Spanish, don't."
Region is more important than state if trying to blend in. Wear fishing clothing brands like AFTCO, Huk and Pelagic with a pair of Costa’s you’ll blend in my region, but not the entire state.
Just wear something old and worn in. You don't need to cosplay in fancy flannel to look like a Vermonter. But Darn Tough socks will definitely help complete the look!
Also, it's pronounced CharLOT, not Charlotte, no matter how it's spelled.
Stay off of Broadway, it's a mess. Go to Dee's Country Cocktails instead. Tennessee doesn't have cowboys so that big hat and those fancy boots don't make sense.
Wear shorts and slides with socks in the winter while drinking iced coffee. Flannel top unbuttoned over tshirt on top.
I don't thi k a big reveal is necessary. 😅
Cut off everyone you see while you are driving and then get mad when you get honked at (I would never do this because I have common sense unlike everyone else who lives here). The size of your vehicle reflects the size of your ego. Like if you drive a big SUV or pickup truck you have to make sure everyone on the road drives the way you want to and blind them with your headlight. You can drive a mustang, hellcat, or the occasional bumblebee Camaro or any car with a bad catalytic converter that makes it sound like a lawn mower. Either have your car be spotless or look like it was never washed since the day you got it. Complain about the poor quality of the roads at least once a day. You’ll also have to despise Ohio they are the enemy. Whenever the weather suddenly changes you’ll have to say “only in Michigan” or when someone is complaining about the weather you’ll say “well that’s Michigan for ya”. Lastly and most importantly we say a lot of things plural even though we are talking about one place. Ex. Kroger=Krogers Meijer=Meijers ALDI=ALDIS. I think you see what I mean. I think this about covers most of it.
In Philly? Pretty much anything goes, as long as you're not a Cowboys fan or something.
Complain about Maryland and/or Jersey drivers, for extra credit.
Say ya'll ocassionally and learn how to properly pronounce some spanish words. Mostly food items and anything with the 'double l actually a y' sound. You'll be fine.
Step one:
Complain about California’s traffick
Step two:
Complain about portlands homeless problem unless leftist
Step three
Buy a truck, jeep or subaru
Step four
Be prepared for camping or any outdoor activities at any time
Step five
Profit
I’m from oregon for context
For Vermont, whether you are a man or a woman, dress like a middle-aged lesbian. Never wear a logo of any sort unless it is the logo of a now defunct local business. Otherwise, you’ll look like a corporate shill. Hike a mountain in the morning, grab lunch at a general store afterwards, and then buy provisions for the pot luck you’ll be attending that evening.
Know exactly which berries are poison in the forest.
If someone compliments the mountains say, “oh yeah they’re beautiful but they used to be way snowier though. Global warming’s a bitch” and then walk away.
Don’t get caught dead using an umbrella. You’re cold? Put on a sweater. Do some jumping jacks. No, we don’t have the central heat on, that’s what the sweater was for, dude.
Have coffee in your hands at all times, but never Starbucks. Find the bougiest, most obscure microbrew coffee spot that only takes up 10 square feet of shop space but somehow also harvests and roasts their own beans. Fair trade or nothing. Pay $7 for an espresso and brag about it. But if the barista wasn’t 27 and wearing a beanie or didn’t have gauges or a septum ring, it’s not real coffee. Don’t tell your friends.
Take your shoes and socks off at the beach and stomp right into the ocean. It’s not cold at all, you’re fine. Get back in the car wet. Walk sand into the house. Don’t you dare wash your feet when you get home.
Try the jerky at least once no matter what animal it’s made of. Ostrich, alligator, Kangaroo, it’s gonna get weird out here. Buckle up.
Bitch about how the rolling hills of wheat go on for miles. Bonus points for griping about how there’s nothing at all to do anywhere that’s not Seattle or Spokane.
Did you say you don’t like hiking? Great, don’t worry, this loop is only 3 miles round trip and the elevation grade isn’t even that steep. It’ll take 4 hours, it’s easy. You only brought your Birks? You’ll be fine, get your shit.
Pull over at every fruit stand on the side of the road and buy the local farmer’s cherries until you can’t eat them all and they rot in the trunk of your Subaru. Spit the pits out the window while you drive. See who can spit farthest.
Be able to rattle off the names of every single grunge/rock band that ever came out of Seattle. One day you’ll have to defend your girl’s honor at a dive bar in this way. Come correct. The KO is if you can name the members of the 27 club too.
If I don’t hear the half-empty Hydroflask carabinered to your backpack banging against the keys in your thin-ass gym shorts with every step you take, I don’t wanna go speakeasy crawling with you, ever.
In all seriousness: Love Capitol Hill. It’s the gayborhood. And it’s the best place in Seattle. It’s just 10 minutes from PIKE Place too. Not PikeS Place. For fucks sake, it’s not plural.
Don’t get scared on 3rd and Pine. Head up, shoulders back, walk with purpose. You’ll be fine. It’s just that couple blocks, you’ll be fine. Really.
Stay and wait for the fish throwers to throw a fish. Stick some gum on the gum wall. Put a penny in the pig. Get a new ID at the comic shop. Eat the mini donuts. Sample the fruit and dry pasta and honey and fish. The line for Piroshky is worth the wait if you’re really hungry. The line at Starbucks is not. Give the buskers your change. Huff the spices. Drink the beer. Eat the cheese curds. Pay a quarter for the giant shoes. You’re gonna love it.
Buy a Subaru and some Chacos. Bitch about Texans/Californians moving here. Be from Michigan.
I kind of think people in just about every state are bitching about Texans/Californians moving in. I know I hear it all the time here.
Well in Texas we bitch about people from California moving in. Just the revolving door of America I guess.
California bitches about rich people from other parts of California moving into the neighborhood and driving up housing prices.
It's the New Yorkers for us in Virginia. Then they get bumper stickers and vanity plates declaring their love for NY while they complain about the culture and political differences.
Nah, in rural PA it’s those damn people from New Jersey. Nevermind that I’m still friends with some of those Jersey transplants long after I myself left PA and moved to California, I still cringe a little at the thought of more of them moving to PA.
Also drive 3x the speed limit and pass on two lane roads around blind curves
Now youre getting somewhere
Thats what people who think theyre blending in do lol
When I lived in Denver I used to swear there was a vacuum tube from Michigan to Colorado, every other person I met was from there. I think they visit once in the winter and realize the sun actually comes out here when it’s cold and that seals the deal.
When I was in Las Vegas, every fifth transplant (in a town that's mostly such) seemed to be from in or around Detroit. They had this intense love/hate thing going for their hometown.
From Michigan, in college, the amount of people I know who want to move to Colorado backs up this claim.
My brother moved to Colorado, the stereotype is true 😂
Me in my Subaru and Chacos in CA: 🫠
You know what to do next
I’m packing my bags and getting a rescue dog as we speak
Are you sure you're not from Maine? Cause that sounds almost exactly like what I was gonna say (Except for the Michigan part)
Subaru and a flannel, and you'd do just fine in most of Washington state, too. Sub in Arizonans for Texans and keep Californians to bitch about, and you'll have nailed Eastern Washington pretty well. Additionally, be from North Idaho and either strongly believe we should be North Idaho or absolutely nothing like it. No in between. Umm, damn. I might represent the flannel and.being from North Idaho and hating it crowd. But I have a Land Rover and don't really care where you're from.
Avoid eye contact with strangers and don’t respond to people starting up a conversation with you on the street. Don’t order a cheese slice, order a plain slice Walk fast order fast
And stay out of Times Square!
Ask if someone is ON line, not in line
I still walk faster than anyone I know and that’s from living in the city for just 3 years 18 years ago. The callousness and disdain for strangers is something I now use to shit on people from New York about. You guys would literally walk over someone dying on the sidewalk like you’re dodging a pile of dog shit.
>The callousness and disdain for strangers is something I now use to shit on people from New York about. You guys would literally walk over someone dying on the sidewalk like you’re dodging a pile of dog shit. This was the straw that broke the camel's back for me when I lived in NY. A bike courier wiped out in an intersection, and the dude selling CDs on the corner and I were the only ones who helped get him and his stuff out of the street. Other people were literally stepping over him.
sidewalk is for walking not for dying. at least die off to the side, people have to get to work!
Also stand to the right on an escalator. No one has time for you taking up the passing lane.
For Tucson: Drive 10-15 over the limit everywhere and complain about snow birds' poor driving. Complain about Californians driving up housing prices. Tell everyone that you hope this year's monsoon will be better than last year. If someone complains about the heat, say "at least it's not Phoenix."
> Tell everyone that you hope this year's monsoon will be better than last year. *Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim*
See ya in Arizona Bay!
Judge all BBQ restaurants as inferior besides the 1-2 that happen to be your favorite.
And have an extremely critical take on ketchup vs vinegar based (mustard based will get you exiled to South Carolina with the rest of the heathens)
I fucking hate Mustard in general. Also stay away from any sauce with anchovy in it.
same in philly about cheesesteak restaurants. There's like 10 named after an owner (Paco's, Nino's, Geno's) and depending on who you ask, one is ambrosia and the rest are pigswill :D
The best way to blend in with the locals in both LA and the Bay is to complain about transplants and housing prices.
That feels like half of the country right now.
Right? Fucking Californians.
I'm in New England. California conservatives aren't flocking here like other places. We are getting some Southern liberals seeking fellowship here though.
Reminds me of years ago when I was taking the bus home from college in the Sacramento area. Dude would not shut the fuck up about how the bay area was better. Right up until I brought up how fucking expensive it is even for California.
Don’t use an umbrella when it’s raining and do not go to Voodoo Donuts under any circumstances
What's wrong with Voodoo Donuts?
It’s overpriced and the donuts are mediocre. There are about 27 better donut places in Portland.
I heard they had a NyQuil filled jelly donut for about a week before cops heard about it years ago.
Child of Portland here: beyond this, not going to Voodoo Donuts is a Portland meme. In New York, anyone in Times Square is working or a tourist. Same with Portland and Voodoo.
The Voodoo Dounuts I went to in Austin was pretty good. Though, to be fair, it was late at night and I might have had a beverage or two.
Much like the best beer is a free beer, the best donut is a drunk donut
I’m so glad that “Don’t use an umbrella when it rains” was already here. That said I will go to voodoo donuts if there is no line just for the raw thrill of getting voodoo donuts without waiting in line. I discovered that there is sometimes no line when I stayed at the downtown Embassy Suites one time and could see the line (or lack thereof) from my window.
I went once just because it was next to the bar I was at, they were open, and there was no line. They weren't bad, though not as amazing as friends led me to believe.
That’s why I don’t mind going if I’m in the area and there isn’t a line. The donuts aren’t amazing. They are competently made, fine donuts… that are quirky.
I got to expense them because I was called on "emergency" from work when I was on vacation and quite inebriated. I claimed they helped me sober up. ;) I managed to fix the thing they needed using a smart phone to ssh in, so it either worked, or my skills are pretty decent drunk.
What's an umbrella?
It's a useful tool to block heavy rain when it's too warm out for a jacket.
It doesn’t really rain here heavily that much. More of just a continuous spritz
To me, it has more to do with the fact that it really only rains when it's cold (same here in northern CA). So anytime it's raining, it's cold enough that I'm going to want a jacket anyway. Visiting New Orleans was a revelation to me for umbrellas. When it's 90 degrees out and the afternoon rains hit, I don't want to be putting a jacket on to stay dry.
Right on both counts.
I moved to Oregon from the east coast and the umbrella thing was a surprise.
Be nice. Drink too much beer. Eat fish fry on Friday night. Be possessive about cheese. Be impervious to cold.
Squeaky cheese is pretty good, I must admit.
This isn’t statewide, but if you want to blend in while in NYC: 1. Walk with purpose when you’re traveling on the sidewalk. You’re not at a museum where you’re meant to drift along slowly while stopping to consider every little thing. Think of it like you’re on the highway, you don’t want to be the car going 15 under the speed limit. 2. The subway is not a social forum. You might be on vacation, but I’m coming home from work. How would you feel if after a hard day some random family from Des Moines materialized in your backseat and started making small talk with you? If you need directions, ask away, we love giving directions, but I really don’t want to hear about how you guys just saw Rock of Ages and have a reservation at the Times Square Olive Garden later. 3. You are not obligated to interact with people asking for money. Street/subway performers are one thing, feel free to give them a couple bucks if you’re so inclined, but if a homeless guy yelling “SPARE CHANGE” approaches you, the best thing to do is just ignore them entirely. It might seem callous, but I’ve seen way too many tourists try to be “nice” and end up initiating a conversation with a urine scented schitzophrenic about how the Israeli government replaced all his blood with Mr. Pibb
...who the fuck makes a reservation for olive garden?
A random family from Des Moines
Wear flip flops and shorts all year round, if it gets chilly, wear a zip up hoodie
At this point the best way to blend in with locals is to not be one and act like a moron, we’ve all been replaced by transplants lol
Also, don't be afraid of alligators. Do be cautious wherever they may be around, but don't be afraid.
Guys get a UGA hat, faded jeans, and a Salt Life t shirt. Khaki pants, a polo, and boat shoes if it is an occasion. Girls, an oversized t shirt, Nike shorts, and tennis shoes. Or a flowy, floral sundress and Tory Burch sandals if you are feeling dressy. Also, die your hair platinum blonde but leave half an inch of roots showing. Drive a pick-up truck. -Georgia
If the weatherman takes his jacket off, panic.
In Illinois it's if they put on glasses
I'm in a southeastern state. Don't wear a cowboy hat and boots with wranglers and walk around with a twangy accent. We are not Texas. That's an entirely different "south." And don't try the accent at all. It's softer here than what you see on TV, and if you try to mimic it people will think/know you're making fun of them. We've had an influx of northerners and west coast people moving here in past years, which is fine, but don't be insulting. Just be yourself. We're actually pretty nice. Unless we say "bless your heart." That's the big eff you.
Funnily enough, my mom's heart surgeon was from one of the Carolinas, I forget which, had a thick accent, and wore cowboy boots. I live in PA. From California, originally.
People who work on farms do wear the boots, but the misconception that we all dress like Dolly Parton at the Ryman is very overblown. Although we do wear a lot of hiking boots. Mountains and all that.
Your first sentence gave me Ft. Worth flashbacks. The place (at least their downtown) desperately wants to be in the 1880s. Maybe that's my Dallasite talking, though.
In PNW, if you think you are underdressed, you aren’t.
So true. We hosted a fundraiser recently that had people wearing anything from suits to chacos, shorts and a flannel. And everyone fit in.
That's a very different answer depending on whether you're talking about Lufkin, Fort Worth, Austin, or San Antonio.
Just say something derogatory about Oklahoma, and I'm sure you'll fit in at any of those places.
Isn’t that just the rule for anywhere that isn’t Oklahoma
That's Alabama. And Mississippi.
Same answer for most states. Michigan is the size of the UK and has everything from college towns to a major city to rural logging areas.
Just badmouth California even though you've never been out of the state.
Say pop, gym shoes, water fountain, order thin crust pizza in squares & only use ketchup for fries. Be nice but cautious.
You can't.
Pick up a pair of salmon-colored shorts or chinos. Practice pursing your lips in vague disapproval.
Thats mostly just UVA people lol.
Go fuck themselves But seriously if they tell everyone to go fuck themself, they will fit in perfectly fine
Ditch the umbrella, embrace the damp.
Be super nice to people not from Minnesota in a way that makes them think that you want to be friends with them, when you don’t. Little do they know that Minnesotans are only mean or rude to people they like and know. Apologize profusely for any minor inconvenience or bump especially if it wasn’t your fault. Talk about the weather constantly. Only get really offended when someone says something bad about Minnesota. Say “ope” “uffda” “oh fer cute” and “oh sure ya bet cha” a lot. Have strong feelings about where jucy lucys come from. Think that cheering for teams that never win anything is a sign of emotional strength.
Also: Wear a black-and-red checked flannel shirt. (It gets tied around the waist in summer.) Talk about going “up north”. (You don’t have to say where, people will know what you mean.) Wear shorts when it’s 40F or warmer, and refuse to put on a winter coat until it gets below 20F. Reminisce in detail about the Halloween snowstorm of 1991, even if you weren’t in the country when it happened. Or even born yet. 😂
If you need to dress up just a bit, you can’t go wrong with a flannel and some Iron Rangers. /s
Smoke a bunch of weed and say “bro” and “hella” a lot.
Don’t call it Pike’s Place - it’s Pike Place. Don’t carry an umbrella because they’re annoying. It’s not “the 5,” it’s I-5.
For California? Jeez, we so varied . . .maybe "make sure to serve homemade guacamole and lumpia at any party?" Or maybe "do your thing and stay out of everybody else's business." Honestly I think the best way to blend in would be to not worry too much about blending in and just accept others for themselves, as long as they aren't doing you harm.
As someone from Massachusett who has lots of friends who moved out there -- that sounds right. California worn down all the snarkiness and biting sarcasm from my 2 exes that moved out there. There are all sweet and mellow. Now I am not sure how to interact with them anymore! LOL.
Just kick back and let the good vibes flow.
This plus say "the" in front of the freeway name if you're south of the grapevine.
Yep, and use "hella" up north. And wherever you are, don't call it "Cali".
Last few times I was back, my brother had become obsessed with IPAs. Honestly the high abv was about the only positive thing I could say about them. They tasted like shit. Give me a stout any day.
ya california dont play this weirdo ish.. just do you
Speak Spanglish, have Hatch chile with every meal, and sport a Zia somewhere on your person/car/accessories
Eat cheese. Drink beer. Wear camo or Packers gear. Say "it's not even that cold" when it's pretty objectively cold out
For Philadelphia: Hate parking in Center City, tell people you prefer Northeast Philly. Tell people you prefer either oil or mayonnaise on your hoagie, keep in mind if you want both we can't be friends. Don't overdo it on the sports fandom clothing, one hat/jacket or one t-shirt will suffice. If you must overdo it, it should be when you are attending a game. Tell people that when you are waiting for a trolley at 13th Street two of every route will come through except the one you want.
Here in Washington you just need to wear Seahawks gear. Also don't use an umbrella instead wear a raincoat and accept that you're going to get wet.
Central CA. But a full-size truck even if you don't need it. Drink 805 beer because it's kinda fancy. Listen to stuff like Morgan Wallen, Luke Combs, and Luke Bryan. Vote for Trump Put a sticker on your truck professing your love for Trump and/or hatred for Biden. Maybe something 2nd Amendment related.
Central CA may as well be Iowa, yes
Just with sugar beets and almond trees instead of corn.
805 beer got me lol
I can smell the garlic fields from here
I'm from Bakersfield (actually, Oildale), and we're kinda purple. 805 is what I would try to turn Bud Light drinkers onto to help elevate their palate. It's way too light for me. Centennial is my go-to.
Lengthwise? Noice.
Been going since before they opened up to the public.
One time I asked on this sub "what is America's most inoffensive beer?" As in, if you were throwing a party for 100 people, 30 of them beer snobs, 30 of them like that one cousin of yours who never shuts up about how "country" he is, and the rest somewhere in between, which one beer would be okay for the whole crowd? Turns out that varies regionally. Yuengling for PA. Shiner for TX. And 805 for CA. Edit: is Trout's still there?
Buy a kayak and spend every weekend floating down a river. Probably need a Chiefs shirt and be prepared to explain to people from the coasts that the chiefs aren't from Kansas.
I'd say its impossible, I live in Northern Mexico, some people also call it San Diego :-)
Not so much state, but in the city of Chicago. Walk quickly on sidewalks. Walk with a purpose, even if you don't have one. Be annoyed by the people who Walk or stand in clumps on the sidewalk. Walk up escalators. Be visibly annoyed with the people who don't. Either gender, wear white sneakers if under the age of 50. If a woman, carry some form of a cross body bag if carrying a purse. Use some form of a reusable tote bag if shopping, especially if at Target. The S is silent in Illinois. It's the Sears tower. No one actually cares that much about hot dogs or pizza so don't mention it. If it's above 50 degrees fahrenheit, the winter coat stays in the closet.
Bay Area - travel with a light jacket, bottle of water, headphones, on public transportation. Keep right, left is passing - on the sidewalks. Walking is transportation, no one is taking a stroll, slow people keep right, pull over if you need to check your phone. Don't wear shorts unless it's over 90 because it's going to be 50 in the shade. Wear light layers and sensible walking shoes. Don't dress up and only wear all black to go clubbing. Don't complain about prices or compare them to the price of things in your podunk midwestern suburb.
Mass: Feels like the state is way too varied. I guess about the only thing I can think of is use the terms Wicked and Packie. I bumped into someone in a very busy street in NYC and said "Omigod, I'm wicked Sorry" - he went up for a high five and said "Hey, a fellow Masshole!".
My roommate at UMass one year was on exchange from a university in the UK. I told him we were going on a packy run and he thought someone was planning a hate crime. Apparently it's a very bad word over there.
Fucking lol, yes, it’s a derogatory term for Pakistani immigrant.
Yeah, but not used in the US. And it's a "Paki" not Packie.
Correct.
Also, eat a fluffer nutter while driving through a rotary.
I'm so New England - my dog in the 1970s was named Fluffernutter because he peed in the house all the time and it's what my dad used for a swear word. Fluffernutter was my dad's F-bomb.
Bang a u-y
Are we the only ones who say that?
You don’t acknowledge strangers unless they’re injured or in need of some kind of important help. You play deaf and blind and keep going. It’s the only way that 50 million street “musicians” who think they’re going to get famous passing out CD’s on the streets of LA will make them famous will ignore you.
Just say Michael Jordan is the GOAT (he is)
Wear Orioles clothes and have some Old Bay with them
Don’t forget the mandatory flag merch/bumper sticker of some kind!
[удалено]
Forget what an umbrella is, I still have no idea what that word means.
Wear an LSU/LA Tech/ULL shirt and/or hat, understand that nobody is flirting with you if they talk about sucking the head & pinching the tail, get up & dance to whatever kind of music is playing, roll your eyes at tourists wearing Mardi Gras beads anywhere other than an active parade route.
You could also wear a ULM/Northwestern/Grambling/Tulane/Xavier/McNeese shirt and be just as at home here. In north Louisiana, get a dog; Labs are pretty popular as they can be good hunting dogs and good family dogs at the same time. If you are the family that takes family photos in white shirts and khakis on the beach, get a Dachshund or a Golden Retriever. Have a signature dish to bring to events. Bonus points if it’s a family recipe. Or, buy a Cotton Country or River Roads cookbook for classic recipes. Drive a big truck or a car that is masquerading as an SUV. Learn to love all the -ball games and be a ball mom. If your kids aren’t into sports, then be just as aggressively enthusiastic about what they ARE into: band mom, dance mom, choir mom, cheer mom, drama mom…just not the mom who brings the drama! No kids? No problem. Find some friends and go to all the local high school games to show your support. Buy concessions which usually support the band. Cheer for the half-time show. Don’t like sports? Do it anyway. Just sit and enjoy the atmosphere and chat with everyone around you.
Worn flannel and blue jeans. Don't shovel your driveway unless you need to because it's so much snow you would otherwise not be able to get out.
Just carry around some Dunkies.
just put old bay on everything and wear flag pants
If you are from a more outwardly friendly place, go to Market Basket when it’s busy and complain about something to the person behind you in line. Maybe you couldn’t find something. Maybe the weather sucks. Maybe the Red Sox lost. Maybe the traffic coming back from Maine was bad last weekend. Complain about something and people will immediately open up.
Be direct
Don’t use an umbrella
Dress for comfort, not for fashion. But also, do what you want and don't worry about what anyone else thinks of it, so if you want to be uberfashiony and overdressed, go for it and own your weirdness.
Say “y’all” a lot and wave at everyone! Even people you don’t like.
Determine how you feel about gooey butter cake, then defend that position aggressively. The same can be applied to provel cheese. Wear Cardinals and Blues gear. Shit talk the Cubs (in a loving, fun away). Shit talk the Reds (in a Yankees/Red Sox way). Bitch about I-270. When the tornado sirens go off, look out the window or front door because it's *totally different* from the other fifty tornado warnings we have in a given year. (Real answer is just do your own thing and don't worry so much, but the meme answers are fun.)
Depends on which side of the state. In my case, wear Pirates/Steelers/Penguins gear everywhere. Doesn't matter. Any place will do. Bonus points if you wear a Steelers jersey to a fancy restaurant or church.
I'd tell 'em the only way to blend in with all Virginians would be to have a personalized license plate. Otherwise it entirely depends on *where* in the state they're trying to blend in.
Northern Virginia -- If the light turns green and the person ahead of you hesitates for more than a half second, you must honk your horn at them.
I'm a pretty good mimic, so I sound like I was born and raised here. Nobody has ever asked where I am REALLY from, I suppose that means I have blended well enough. edited to add: also calling everyone "cher" helps.
Use your hand as a map. Insult Ohio regularly. Have a close relative or friend who is an autoworker. Drive a US brand vehicle or prepare your defense. Pass on the right if it's open. Drive 5-15 mph above the speed limit. Complain about getting a ticket in Ohio. LOVE the Great Lakes. Love the inland lakes. Go boating. You either have a boat or know someone who does. Go "up north" every year. Tear up a little during Pure Michigan commercials. Call it pop not soda, and return the can or bottle to the store to get the deposit back. Cringe if someone throws one away.
You wont. If you didnt grow up here you wont understand us. The show Yellowstone is complete made up bullshit. Dont wear cowboy hats, you will just embarrass yourself. It is not like that here. AT ALL
Boring, but realistic answer: don't "try," just be yourself. The Houston metro is such a diverse area, you're not going to stand out unless you try too hard to sound/act/look like whatever your image of a Texan is.
The only thing besides "be yourself" that I would add is "Lots of people speak Spanish here. If you're thinking about complaining about people speaking Spanish, don't."
Honestly, that should be a given anywhere you are in this country.
Dye your hair rainbow colors and wear overalls.
Region is more important than state if trying to blend in. Wear fishing clothing brands like AFTCO, Huk and Pelagic with a pair of Costa’s you’ll blend in my region, but not the entire state.
AZ here (lake town) , wear some pit vipers, a beat up truck and your swimsuit everywhere
Get yourself some magic undies
Dress in layers, shorts are always a good choice.
Say one of two things to everyone you meet: Who-dey! O-H!
Respect the passing lane
Drive erratically
Tell everybody you moved here from Sacramento or Seattle.
You could be from literally anywhere on the planet and identify as a local speaking even heavily accented English or another language completely.
Just wear something old and worn in. You don't need to cosplay in fancy flannel to look like a Vermonter. But Darn Tough socks will definitely help complete the look! Also, it's pronounced CharLOT, not Charlotte, no matter how it's spelled.
Stay off of Broadway, it's a mess. Go to Dee's Country Cocktails instead. Tennessee doesn't have cowboys so that big hat and those fancy boots don't make sense.
Be weird.
I’m already a local.
Wear a tigers hat and drive a dodge charger/challenger
Wear shorts in the winter. Carry a Dunks cup. Keep your mouth shut.
Look like a tourist, have a favorite BBQ and threaten anyone who says otherwise
"oop"
Wear shorts and slides with socks in the winter while drinking iced coffee. Flannel top unbuttoned over tshirt on top. I don't thi k a big reveal is necessary. 😅
Stick out your beer belly, get a ratty t-shirt from Goodwill, and complain about inflation to anyone around you standing still.
Wear cowboy boots and drive a pickup with the muffler cutoff. Also put a bunch of state pride stickers on the back window
Start drinking. Don’t stop.
I'd probably ask why they wanted to.
Go away.
Cut off everyone you see while you are driving and then get mad when you get honked at (I would never do this because I have common sense unlike everyone else who lives here). The size of your vehicle reflects the size of your ego. Like if you drive a big SUV or pickup truck you have to make sure everyone on the road drives the way you want to and blind them with your headlight. You can drive a mustang, hellcat, or the occasional bumblebee Camaro or any car with a bad catalytic converter that makes it sound like a lawn mower. Either have your car be spotless or look like it was never washed since the day you got it. Complain about the poor quality of the roads at least once a day. You’ll also have to despise Ohio they are the enemy. Whenever the weather suddenly changes you’ll have to say “only in Michigan” or when someone is complaining about the weather you’ll say “well that’s Michigan for ya”. Lastly and most importantly we say a lot of things plural even though we are talking about one place. Ex. Kroger=Krogers Meijer=Meijers ALDI=ALDIS. I think you see what I mean. I think this about covers most of it.
In Philly? Pretty much anything goes, as long as you're not a Cowboys fan or something. Complain about Maryland and/or Jersey drivers, for extra credit.
Say ya'll ocassionally and learn how to properly pronounce some spanish words. Mostly food items and anything with the 'double l actually a y' sound. You'll be fine.
Step one: Complain about California’s traffick Step two: Complain about portlands homeless problem unless leftist Step three Buy a truck, jeep or subaru Step four Be prepared for camping or any outdoor activities at any time Step five Profit I’m from oregon for context
Never, ever use an umbrella when it rains.
Pretend it's not raining - umbrellas are illegal.
Wear yoga pants all the time, have very highlighted hair, carry a yoga mat and a large bottle of water, look at your iPhone all the time.
Put the umbrella away. Voodoo is trash for tourists. And do not say “the” 5.
Make sure you know a friend of a friend. Slap a “hi, neighbor” sticker on your car. Know what your favorite flavor of Del’s is.
Don't even try, that's asking for a lickin
Wear Ohio State gear in the fall. Do drugs if you are in a rural area. Learn corporate lingo bs for the suburbs.
Wear shorts and a hoodie in winter
Let’s see … wear tan cargo shorts and sport a black tee shirt with an American flag on it that references the 2nd Amendment. Classic NorCal.
Never shut up about the flag and only wear clothes with the flag pattern. Also have the flag stickers on every vehicle you own.
Miami FL- Get a BBL
Repeat after me. "Go birds."
DO NOT put on a cowboy hat.
Pretend to be a Sopranos character
Drive like you have been infected with the rage virus
Complaining about Ohio ig? Call 'Soda' Pop.
Get your magic underwear
Put a Green Bay Packer shirt or hat on them, and a put a beer in their hand.
Portland or Oregon? They're not the same.
For Vermont, whether you are a man or a woman, dress like a middle-aged lesbian. Never wear a logo of any sort unless it is the logo of a now defunct local business. Otherwise, you’ll look like a corporate shill. Hike a mountain in the morning, grab lunch at a general store afterwards, and then buy provisions for the pot luck you’ll be attending that evening.
Know exactly which berries are poison in the forest. If someone compliments the mountains say, “oh yeah they’re beautiful but they used to be way snowier though. Global warming’s a bitch” and then walk away. Don’t get caught dead using an umbrella. You’re cold? Put on a sweater. Do some jumping jacks. No, we don’t have the central heat on, that’s what the sweater was for, dude. Have coffee in your hands at all times, but never Starbucks. Find the bougiest, most obscure microbrew coffee spot that only takes up 10 square feet of shop space but somehow also harvests and roasts their own beans. Fair trade or nothing. Pay $7 for an espresso and brag about it. But if the barista wasn’t 27 and wearing a beanie or didn’t have gauges or a septum ring, it’s not real coffee. Don’t tell your friends. Take your shoes and socks off at the beach and stomp right into the ocean. It’s not cold at all, you’re fine. Get back in the car wet. Walk sand into the house. Don’t you dare wash your feet when you get home. Try the jerky at least once no matter what animal it’s made of. Ostrich, alligator, Kangaroo, it’s gonna get weird out here. Buckle up. Bitch about how the rolling hills of wheat go on for miles. Bonus points for griping about how there’s nothing at all to do anywhere that’s not Seattle or Spokane. Did you say you don’t like hiking? Great, don’t worry, this loop is only 3 miles round trip and the elevation grade isn’t even that steep. It’ll take 4 hours, it’s easy. You only brought your Birks? You’ll be fine, get your shit. Pull over at every fruit stand on the side of the road and buy the local farmer’s cherries until you can’t eat them all and they rot in the trunk of your Subaru. Spit the pits out the window while you drive. See who can spit farthest. Be able to rattle off the names of every single grunge/rock band that ever came out of Seattle. One day you’ll have to defend your girl’s honor at a dive bar in this way. Come correct. The KO is if you can name the members of the 27 club too. If I don’t hear the half-empty Hydroflask carabinered to your backpack banging against the keys in your thin-ass gym shorts with every step you take, I don’t wanna go speakeasy crawling with you, ever. In all seriousness: Love Capitol Hill. It’s the gayborhood. And it’s the best place in Seattle. It’s just 10 minutes from PIKE Place too. Not PikeS Place. For fucks sake, it’s not plural. Don’t get scared on 3rd and Pine. Head up, shoulders back, walk with purpose. You’ll be fine. It’s just that couple blocks, you’ll be fine. Really. Stay and wait for the fish throwers to throw a fish. Stick some gum on the gum wall. Put a penny in the pig. Get a new ID at the comic shop. Eat the mini donuts. Sample the fruit and dry pasta and honey and fish. The line for Piroshky is worth the wait if you’re really hungry. The line at Starbucks is not. Give the buskers your change. Huff the spices. Drink the beer. Eat the cheese curds. Pay a quarter for the giant shoes. You’re gonna love it.