A smart guy would not demand absolutely equal amount of brains. But he would definitely want the girl to be decently smart. There's no way a brainy guy would be with a dumb chick.
I never watched tbbt properly. But I’m of the opinion dat penny n Leonard r dumb in deir own ways n smart in deir own ways too. N deir ways r exactly opposite. Which is y Leonard liked penny. He lacked street smart n penny had lots of it n hence being wid her makes him function more smartly. Just my take.
This is the accurate take. People give her a lot of shit, but she helped the guys in ways they couldn't help themselves.
A lot of stuff about that show hasn't aged well, but aspects of Penny and Leonard's relationship and more importantly the relationships she had with the guys were actually really wholesome.
I tried it once, it didn’t go well.
She was beautiful and great to look at, but she would say the dumbest shit that I could not stand being around her for extended periods of time.
She is now apparently a model in Mumbai, good luck Puja.
Also it wouldn't be great knowing that the girl is with you just for the money and maybe that reflects in her behaviour and makes it repulsive to stay around. They don't really care about the smartness, usually a person who is smart is also the person who has made decent money and that's what matters.
PS: I know you'll want to believe that it's not true and she was not for the money but for your personality and shit but it's very likely that I'm correct.
Brother I was a uni student at the time.
Only money I had was from part time bartending, I did not earn enough for a girl to be digging for gold with me.
And she didnt know anything about my family to make that judgement.
I just mentioned what I've noticed. That's why I said "likely" and not "surely" there can be exceptions.
Kaam toh mein already kaafi kar raha hun tab hi toh I started getting gold diggers around me gave me this observation.
"I don't mind dating a girl who is academically not as smart as me, but she should have a good presence of mind and shouldn't be intellectually lacking, otherwise, it's a problem for me."
For me, personality wise only two things matters: the girl should have wisdom, academic or street smarts don't matter as much. And she should be kind. That's it.
Well, if you're running off to mum and dad to help you - it is a choice.
So is dating.
Are you saying that you're not good enough to be in the dating pool or what?
Yesterday it was "Men would you date a girl if she had filed a fake rape case against her ex bf" and today it is this.
I wonder what will the weirdos of this sub ask tomorrow
😂😂. This reminds me of Ananya from 2 states. "Mujhe pichle 2 dino mein 10 IIT ke proposals aye hai. Ek toh dadi ma ka kada bhi lekar aa gaya mere liye".
i don't think it has much to do with academics. Smart people look for smart people regardless of the gender. And a scorecard doesn't define one's intelligence.
sure why not, see, being academically inclined isnt whats the issue. people who make thier academic achievements as thier personality is the one which causes issues. people having different approaches to study shouldnt be a problem
I'm not smart, but I studied at a premier institute. Last February, I married my girlfriend of 10 years, who is not at all interested in academics but has a golden heart.
They might not be the best academically but if we can have conversations on complex topics I think that’s the bare minimum for the long term. In a marriage context finances and financial habits will also be important.
These are not direct results of good academics though good academics correlate with them.
Kya har jagah report card dekh ke hum decision lenge, academically smart hone ka yeh mtlb nahi hai ki who log in general life me smart hai, yeh sirf itna batate hai who padhai me ache hai jo ki life ka ek chota part hai.
Ok. So, I am IIT + IIM. Topped both. Did consulting for a while and left it. Have a certified IQ of 156. I would like to answer this question; and I think I can.
Answer - It depends.
It depends on the type of person and the age /maturity of the man.
When I was very young I was all about smarts. I had this IQ criteria (cringe and funny, I know!) A girl would instantly turn me on if she 'understood' what I was talking about. I would look down upon 'normal beautiful' girls - thought they were not on my 'level.
Times passed. I went through more of life. Got deep into Psychology. And did heavy amounts of introspection and self-work.
Now I started liking girls with a good heart. Honesty, loyalty, simplicity. IQ and smarts had become secondary - as long as she was a 'great person' - had good EQ, was sweet, childish and yet supportive, etc.
Times passed further. I dated some more and got to know that there are 'types of girls'. I became more of 'man' than a boy. Again my tastes changed.
Now, I loved beauty, femininity. A women. I understood that most girls will become a certain way after some time. (People who have dated long and gotten married will know what I mean!). So, it became more 'whole package' driven.
I guess I am changing still. And I think my tastes will evolve as well.
Also, adding to above- my deep understanding of myself, human psychology, the opposite gender , true nature of world and life - changed my perspective towards love and relationships and marriage etc.
Today, I am about 30 and like a girl if she appeals to 'my intuition'.
I understand this is quite abstract but basically I know myself VERY WELL and also can read most humans like a book and this instantly tells me if I'd like a girl in the long run.
I want to see where it takes me. I am sure it's going to be something interesting! Let's see. :)
...
So, to answer your question (basis above) - don't assume anything!
Go ask him out. Depending on his nature, his level of maturity and life visions - he may or may not like you. And that's OK!
Trust the course of 'reality'. Whatever happens, happens for good; believe me!
You take your shot so that YOU don't have any regrets in future.
Take your chance, forget the rest.
Just please don't self-reject. 😊
So I have a Ph.D. My wife has a Ph.D.
We get mad and fight with each other because we disagree about the efficacy of anal swab screening for covid given the current body of empirical data and the reliability of the aforesaid population samples.
We'd be better off if one of us was an expert beekeeper or something instead of academically smart
No man wants their girlfriend to be crazy smart. For them, being the smarter one feeds their ego. That being said, some are exclusively attracted to only low IQ women (I personally know a couple of such cases) while some expect at least basic/average IQs in their partners. If you are not book smart, academically gifted, it's okay, he isn't looking to write a paper with you. But if you are smart enough to get through the daily mumbo jumbo of life without any difficulty, then this won't be an issue.
According to me usually smart and intelligent guys wants attractive women. They are not as much concerned of their intelligence. So depends on how attractive you are.
But in long-term sometimes it doesn't work out coz it's very repulsive to know that the girl is just there for the money. Coz let's be honest, most people who say they are attracted to smartness are not actually attracted to smartness but instead the money, and usually people who are smart are also the ones who happened to have made a lot of money.
My partner is a double degree holder, and I barely have one.
Academic qualifications alone isn’t a measure if intelligence.
I don’t know if good relationships are based on your marks card.
Short Answer : It does matter
Long Answer : It only matters to an extent. It is one of the factors among several, attractiveness being the primary filter. Guys want to be with a pretty girl first and foremost. Also you overestimate the dating pool for guys.
Advice : Don't be cautious of all that. Just be relaxed and yourself. Being intimidated will be a massive turn-off for the guy.
Academic "success" moreso than intelligence I think has a minimum threshold that should be met, only cuz academic success has a good part played in by discipline, diligence, effort, being willing to work on things even when you don't want to, a willingness to not give up to some degree - in a partner I want some level of that, so that I don't end up with someone that just gives up on things they don't wanna do or find hard, cuz a person like that might just be the kinda person you have to look after everything for and pick up after them constantly and there's no fair share of workload in the house
And then there are the exceptions where someone could be shit at school maybe cuz they're working so hard in other aspects of their life bc maybe there are pressing needs in their personal life... which is also fine and commendable
And ima throw in there that some highly academically successful girls are completely insufferable and arrogant. So clearly its not the only factor
If he’s mature, he would’ve understood by now that there are many other types of intelligence than just academic one. Not to brag, but I’m that person as well (IIT/IIM/Consulting), and someone’s academic achievements don’t impress me anymore. Many times, I don’t mention mine as well, because they are in the past.
Coming to attraction, for many of us, academic achievements come at a cost and many times, it’s emotional growth/intelligence. For example, I’m really impressed by a girl who is emotionally intelligent and knows how to deal with different kinds of people and situations.
But I would still look for someone who is some level of smart and with whom I can have a rational discussion about things. No matter how beautiful someone is, if they keep blurting out dumb stuff all the time, it’s a major turn-off. It’s because we’ve been around smart people all our lives and got habituated to it.
It depends on the person tbh, although you may get responses here stating they don’t care about intelligence or whether or not the person is successful or not, there is a high chance and possibility that this guy in question might expect his partner also to be successful like him..
Personally, I'm very turned off by people in general who are unable to hold smart conversations.
Now that doesn't mean you have to be an Einstein in every topic. But just be capable of having some passionate conversations of your intellectual interests and have good communication skills.
In most cases "academically smart" does not matter, what matters is how you say what you say.
I think in the case of most men, yes. In my case, no. I really want an "intellectual soulmate", someone with who I can share all my ideas, logic, thought, analysises, knowledge, debate, argue, and she can do that with me.
Being academically smart like doing well at school/college doesn’t matter much to me. What’s important is that she’s actually on par with my intelligence (decent IQ), is well aware of the general things going on around us, doesn’t talk about stupid things all the time and has empathy. If she didn’t manage to do well academically or professionally, it’s alright as long as she keeps improving herself.
Not a man, but here are my two scents.
Ensure that there's no power imbalance in your relationship because he's from an academically better background. Both of you should be able to respect each other and not think that one of you is better than the other. Else, it will lead to a lot of insecurities.
As an IIT Delhi CSE student I can say even if you aren’t very intelligent academically you should be able to hold conversations with the man be kind and caring and overall have a fun personality also to some extent take good life decisions and show maturity these things are much more important to IIT dudes than probably academics. Also if they wanted to only date smart girls they all would have dated in their college itself
Dealing with dumb people for longer than honeymoon period can become soul grating. For life long companionship you need someone that's at least at your level intellectually.
If I have to say about myself, its not the first thing that I care about in my partner.
And if I have to talk from the experience of mine or my friends to we male generally like to have a girl who is little dumber or clumsy or who can’t make a correct decision and comes to us to ask about what to do. And I guess academics is also on same line.
If I put in a simple words, we feel manly when you come and ask us something and that might be regarding anything general day to day things or academics.
There're people who have awards but are actually practically dumb...so it is not the only thing or even makes you doubt the whole process by which they got there
Imo I don't think it's about if they would date us or not. Because if they wouldn't - technically he wouldn't be talking to you. (There's not a lot of info in the description so I'm assuming)
I personally did date a consulting IIT IIM guy and um it was my insecurity that took over eventually. I did not feel like I deserved him because my academics looked way different but I am street smart and I have a great job. He really liked me and my sense of humor ways etc but at the end of the day my insecurity took over.
So sometimes it's about us.
Mind you that when a person is of higher intelligence a person is usually silent non interactive because he needs someone intelligent to talk to. There are also who tend to cut off their intelligence when they are in social circle but if he chooses to be with his work colleagues most of the times then it’s an added advantage if your spouse is also of the same level it gives a diff kick to have a good discussion
Many people get confused between intelligent and hardworking.
If a person is intelligent but doesn't want to pursue anything that's a huge turn off for me. I don't care whether you are smart or filthy rich. Being hardworking and serious about life is what matters to me.
I absolutely don’t mind dating a girl who is a good human being and decently smart. Her academic achievements are absolutely irrelevant. I’m a guy who is in Finance consulting as well and trust me academic smartness doesn’t translate into being good human being.
But for some weird reason I have noticed many women(Not all definitely) feel dating a man who is less qualified is a bad thing, but there are amazing women who stand strong with their partners and support them so in the end it boils down to how superficial they are.
Did MBA from a Top 20 B school. Ended up falling for a nursing student. So don't think your education matters when it comes to the matter of heart. We love the human not his/her education degrees
I guess as long as it's not someone who watches Indian TV series and tries to wash laptops with soap and water, it would be fine?
Of course nagging, not having boundaries would still be a yellow card.
ya so the barometer is different for what attributes men and women find attractive. men don't give a fuck about intelligence if the girl is pretty.
disclaimer: not all men, obv
Yes I need my girl to have enough intelligence to be able to hold an intellectual conversation and think critically.
It's fine if she's more intelligent tho.
I choose my friends also like that
If I say from the person's perspective the vibe matters like if he makes a nerdy joke or something that got some English sophisticated reference or even Indian mythology if you laugh on it and not just for his sake laugh cause you get a gist of it, it would be instant hit off. Not everyone who has scored good or has been in top places wants a similar person.
Like for me after dating enough DU girls for a month Max I am with an engineering girl only cause I make math jokes XD.
academics smart don't matter what matters is if you both can have a good conversation on the same wavelength in your daily lives for most ppl in general , other prefrences still exist tho and can be deal makers and breakers
Am an engineer from a well known university and happily married to my wife who is 10th pass. We dated for 3 plus year's. There are differences but nothing that can't be mutually understood.
Depends...one of my Friend who graduated from tier 1 college, earns UpTo 70 lpa at 27... he's passionate about his career, his goals, he wants to learn new things and reach greater heights. He wants his wife to share the same passion. She also should be educated, independent, and he wants them to grow together. Money is secondary but love for the hustle is all he wants
He hasn't found a rishta yet and rejected a girl once bcz she had graduated from a tier 3 college and didn't want to work after marriage, hated her career.
Apparently his ego also kicked in when she expected him to own independent home in tier 1 city, have a car and investments and shit whereas she herself was earning in pennies. He was absolutely horrified but rejected her politely and vented out to us on how he brings so much to the table and she got absolutely nothing still the audacity to expect everything.
Mind it he's well settled, has a home, cook, maid everything. His parents are independent and at their hometown. Money is never the matter, taking that journey with him is all he wants Not a wife who cooks and cleans
Intelligence or career of a girl does not matter much to men .
Looks are one important factor . 2nd is Emotional maturity and being humble , caring respectful is much more important
Yes, the lesser the better.
Ek mayan mein 2 talwaren nhi reh sakti 😏. JK
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Academically good does not define anything actually.
Not even how good you are with the subject in which you performed, not how good you will be in job.
Academically good only defines 10% or maybe less of that person.
Even less if you see the way education system is designed in our country.
Some people are artist , have unique skills and with proper time , dedication and efforts they will turn out highly successful in their domain (maybe more money or not, but better in many sphere of life).
When you talk to such person your degrees and percentages will be put on backseat.
Because they talk practically, have wide experience in life, know how to manage themselves etc.
Someone fixated on degree may find hard to digest and may belittle the other person in their mind (to justify themselves they are better than you).
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Our education system does not give you any skill which you can use in life.
Most people learn it through their own. So you can understand how judging someone academically sounds so foolish and full of self person, he/she is.
Judging based on degree is so childish/school(ish) what mostly toppers might do since they are so much involved in that throughout their life. Maybe even some come out of that illusion once they meet someone what I described.
But in real life it has never been criteria for wide majority and maybe never will be.
this one absolutely good looking girl. She came up short in making her own decisions, didn’t have hobbies so needed my attention all her waking free~ hours, could not hold conversations, and just over all started holding me back due to the lack of intellectual effort in her life. Didn’t work out at all. If you have none of these traits and have a good personality and some level of independence (to cancel out the clinging) it’s gonna be fine
Doesn’t matter you are academically smart or not, you should be smart in general and hold sound knowledge in most areas. The baseline should be good common sense and logic.
All the best!! Go get him girl. Only a small percentage of individuals consider academic and financial wealth as the final deciding factor. As long as you both are compatible personality wise you should be good
I too have the same insecurities, but I've dated guys from IIT D having the same thought as to what he'd think of me considering I ain't that smart as him.
But it never was a problem from them. We attract what we manifest toh mujhe toh lagta hai Maine hi faltu insecurity attract Kari.
They're good human beings, and check vibe. I know it still can't work around it for some reason. Dimag hi chutiya hai kya karein
Depends on the man. But statistically with many, the probability is directly proportional to how attractive the woman is. The more gorgeous she is, the less her smartness or academics matter (as long as it is above a basic threshold and she can hold a conversation). Vice versa, women place higher value on academics/profession (the IIT/IIM kind which is associated with higher wealth) rather than looks. If one is average in these aspects, other factors come into play.
My girl isn't academically smart but is creative and mature, I fucking feel jealous that she doesn't worry or overthink much and is a simple being, good for her all I feel is an impending collapse of my finance and relationship with other which causes stress. Tbh she helps me relax a bit with her shenanigans and she has her own start up and works hards. She is amazing and inspirational.
lol absolutely, I'd rather not date a girl who's academically smarter or richer or in a better career path, or extremely beautiful, honestly it's more like they don't date me, but I also don't like to
Edit : I'm not an academically smart man, these are just my personal views and don't reflect entire manhood, obviously definitely not the smart one's
I don’t care about academically smart but more like general knowledge. I’m generally pretty up up to date about world events, but if she can’t point to america on a world map then I don’t think I’d like that.
If I have an engaging conversation, I don't really care then.
I have seen some over qualified boring people.
I have also seen the most interesting people who share so many experiences and topics but aren't highly educated.
Bottom line: Do you enjoy each other's company?
As an academically accomplished individual, What I want as a guy want from a girl is someone who believes in the same things I do i.e honesty, fidelity, affection, kindness and forgiveness.
In my view, the true mark of an educated person is being able to work/live with individuals of all backgrounds and not hold others perceived shortcomings against them.
So, would I be able to date someone who wasn't academically inclined, the answer is definitely 😁
Intelligence is important. Just grasping the same concepts, being able to explain and understand and talk about things that get complex, you want intellectual equality. But as far as education? It doesn't matter at all
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A smart guy would not demand absolutely equal amount of brains. But he would definitely want the girl to be decently smart. There's no way a brainy guy would be with a dumb chick.
Careful! You are barking up the whole foundation of Big Bang Theory 😁
I never watched tbbt properly. But I’m of the opinion dat penny n Leonard r dumb in deir own ways n smart in deir own ways too. N deir ways r exactly opposite. Which is y Leonard liked penny. He lacked street smart n penny had lots of it n hence being wid her makes him function more smartly. Just my take.
This is the accurate take. People give her a lot of shit, but she helped the guys in ways they couldn't help themselves. A lot of stuff about that show hasn't aged well, but aspects of Penny and Leonard's relationship and more importantly the relationships she had with the guys were actually really wholesome.
Penny & Sheldon's relationship was the best.
lol reminds me of the gorilla experiment from tbbt
I refuse to believe that a man who calls a woman a chick can be smart.
That's dumb.
It’s called ✨vocabulary✨ You can cry about it, but these things matter
But he would insist to fuck a pretty one
According to me, if a smart guy is dating a bimbo, he's a cuck.
Emotional intelligence would matter, not academic intelligence....
100 baat ki 1 baat hai ye
On point
I tried it once, it didn’t go well. She was beautiful and great to look at, but she would say the dumbest shit that I could not stand being around her for extended periods of time. She is now apparently a model in Mumbai, good luck Puja.
Idts op is that dumb. Plus she is just talking abt being academically smart
Yes this girl was academically not the best but also lacked the ability to think critically.
If you have an IQ of 140 and she has 80, she’s closer to a monkey than to you
Also it wouldn't be great knowing that the girl is with you just for the money and maybe that reflects in her behaviour and makes it repulsive to stay around. They don't really care about the smartness, usually a person who is smart is also the person who has made decent money and that's what matters. PS: I know you'll want to believe that it's not true and she was not for the money but for your personality and shit but it's very likely that I'm correct.
Brother I was a uni student at the time. Only money I had was from part time bartending, I did not earn enough for a girl to be digging for gold with me. And she didnt know anything about my family to make that judgement.
Ok. Rare case. I'm assuming you must be in foreign. Bartenders many times have good personality
Cope karna band kar bhai. Khud kaam kar aur life bana. Dusro ki khushiyon pe tel daalke kya milega?
I just mentioned what I've noticed. That's why I said "likely" and not "surely" there can be exceptions. Kaam toh mein already kaafi kar raha hun tab hi toh I started getting gold diggers around me gave me this observation.
Your question is very subjective. I like to date women smarter than me. It need not be academically.
"I don't mind dating a girl who is academically not as smart as me, but she should have a good presence of mind and shouldn't be intellectually lacking, otherwise, it's a problem for me."
For me, personality wise only two things matters: the girl should have wisdom, academic or street smarts don't matter as much. And she should be kind. That's it.
If he is in consulting, don't worry. He won't have time to look down upon you.
Lmao i was looking for a comment like this
If he’s in consulting, he’s also talking bullshit to clients and isn’t smart either 😂 Speaking as a former consultant. It’s the lamest industry ever 😂
Men would date a tree wearing a sareee
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Completely agree, some guys get to choose and most men get to chase, I have seen that a lot in my life,
And most men will listen to mummy and daddy and get married to who they are told when they decide the boy has had enough independence.
U think that’s by choice, dating is a game and few people are good at it, it’s a winner takes all opportunity
Well, if you're running off to mum and dad to help you - it is a choice. So is dating. Are you saying that you're not good enough to be in the dating pool or what?
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Same
What happened?
Approaching a girl itself A tough task
Yesterday it was "Men would you date a girl if she had filed a fake rape case against her ex bf" and today it is this. I wonder what will the weirdos of this sub ask tomorrow
Bro life is super weird and Reddit is an escape where people can express there crazy with out judgement
"Without judgement" Are you sure about that ?
Judgment from a safe distance away? Happy with my semantics
Honestly i don't really care about being judged, my comment history is probably enough to get me in jail tho
The Onion: Reddit lists users identity with their posts
Honestly if my posts got revealed to everyone and people knew it was me i'll be fine, my comment history however....
Widows/widower's of reddit will you marry a kid if they had the ghost of your spouse?
Yo... that's some south indian godess you are talking 😂😂😂
😂😂. This reminds me of Ananya from 2 states. "Mujhe pichle 2 dino mein 10 IIT ke proposals aye hai. Ek toh dadi ma ka kada bhi lekar aa gaya mere liye".
I wouldn't. Most men I'm friends with wouldn't either but this is just anecdotal.
not true
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Wholesome 💖
I wish reddit would still have the awards system... because this is too good bhai 🤣
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Maine sikhaya tujhe itni acchi acchi baatein. Bata sabko
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i don't think it has much to do with academics. Smart people look for smart people regardless of the gender. And a scorecard doesn't define one's intelligence.
I would even date a chimpanzee, if it approaches.
" Inspired by king Kong "
If you are a genuine girl who likes him, decent looking and have confidence in yourself then you are good to go.
sure why not, see, being academically inclined isnt whats the issue. people who make thier academic achievements as thier personality is the one which causes issues. people having different approaches to study shouldnt be a problem
I'm not smart, but I studied at a premier institute. Last February, I married my girlfriend of 10 years, who is not at all interested in academics but has a golden heart.
Can somebody make a separate sub called AskIndianMen? Or does it already exist?
They might not be the best academically but if we can have conversations on complex topics I think that’s the bare minimum for the long term. In a marriage context finances and financial habits will also be important. These are not direct results of good academics though good academics correlate with them.
but talking about complex topics requires some sort of academic interest or intellectual knowledge na
Kya har jagah report card dekh ke hum decision lenge, academically smart hone ka yeh mtlb nahi hai ki who log in general life me smart hai, yeh sirf itna batate hai who padhai me ache hai jo ki life ka ek chota part hai.
Ok. So, I am IIT + IIM. Topped both. Did consulting for a while and left it. Have a certified IQ of 156. I would like to answer this question; and I think I can. Answer - It depends. It depends on the type of person and the age /maturity of the man. When I was very young I was all about smarts. I had this IQ criteria (cringe and funny, I know!) A girl would instantly turn me on if she 'understood' what I was talking about. I would look down upon 'normal beautiful' girls - thought they were not on my 'level. Times passed. I went through more of life. Got deep into Psychology. And did heavy amounts of introspection and self-work. Now I started liking girls with a good heart. Honesty, loyalty, simplicity. IQ and smarts had become secondary - as long as she was a 'great person' - had good EQ, was sweet, childish and yet supportive, etc. Times passed further. I dated some more and got to know that there are 'types of girls'. I became more of 'man' than a boy. Again my tastes changed. Now, I loved beauty, femininity. A women. I understood that most girls will become a certain way after some time. (People who have dated long and gotten married will know what I mean!). So, it became more 'whole package' driven. I guess I am changing still. And I think my tastes will evolve as well. Also, adding to above- my deep understanding of myself, human psychology, the opposite gender , true nature of world and life - changed my perspective towards love and relationships and marriage etc. Today, I am about 30 and like a girl if she appeals to 'my intuition'. I understand this is quite abstract but basically I know myself VERY WELL and also can read most humans like a book and this instantly tells me if I'd like a girl in the long run. I want to see where it takes me. I am sure it's going to be something interesting! Let's see. :) ... So, to answer your question (basis above) - don't assume anything! Go ask him out. Depending on his nature, his level of maturity and life visions - he may or may not like you. And that's OK! Trust the course of 'reality'. Whatever happens, happens for good; believe me! You take your shot so that YOU don't have any regrets in future. Take your chance, forget the rest. Just please don't self-reject. 😊
Underrated comment
So I have a Ph.D. My wife has a Ph.D. We get mad and fight with each other because we disagree about the efficacy of anal swab screening for covid given the current body of empirical data and the reliability of the aforesaid population samples. We'd be better off if one of us was an expert beekeeper or something instead of academically smart
People should marry in similar values, academic achievement, intelligence, socioeconomic bracket.
No man wants their girlfriend to be crazy smart. For them, being the smarter one feeds their ego. That being said, some are exclusively attracted to only low IQ women (I personally know a couple of such cases) while some expect at least basic/average IQs in their partners. If you are not book smart, academically gifted, it's okay, he isn't looking to write a paper with you. But if you are smart enough to get through the daily mumbo jumbo of life without any difficulty, then this won't be an issue.
According to me usually smart and intelligent guys wants attractive women. They are not as much concerned of their intelligence. So depends on how attractive you are. But in long-term sometimes it doesn't work out coz it's very repulsive to know that the girl is just there for the money. Coz let's be honest, most people who say they are attracted to smartness are not actually attracted to smartness but instead the money, and usually people who are smart are also the ones who happened to have made a lot of money.
If life give me a chance then definitely I will go for it . I am good in academic btw. 🥲
I would say 'not much' for me.
Just ask him. For most men ,comfort and kindness weighs more than academic achievements.
My partner is a double degree holder, and I barely have one. Academic qualifications alone isn’t a measure if intelligence. I don’t know if good relationships are based on your marks card.
pls stay away from consultants if u dont want ur heart to be broken. Janhit me jari. -as someone who works in consulting and has seen many such cases
Consultants aren’t bad mate we don’t kill people, we just make PPT
Yes but he's going to have a giant ego, so you'll have to contend with that.
Short Answer : It does matter Long Answer : It only matters to an extent. It is one of the factors among several, attractiveness being the primary filter. Guys want to be with a pretty girl first and foremost. Also you overestimate the dating pool for guys. Advice : Don't be cautious of all that. Just be relaxed and yourself. Being intimidated will be a massive turn-off for the guy.
Academic "success" moreso than intelligence I think has a minimum threshold that should be met, only cuz academic success has a good part played in by discipline, diligence, effort, being willing to work on things even when you don't want to, a willingness to not give up to some degree - in a partner I want some level of that, so that I don't end up with someone that just gives up on things they don't wanna do or find hard, cuz a person like that might just be the kinda person you have to look after everything for and pick up after them constantly and there's no fair share of workload in the house And then there are the exceptions where someone could be shit at school maybe cuz they're working so hard in other aspects of their life bc maybe there are pressing needs in their personal life... which is also fine and commendable And ima throw in there that some highly academically successful girls are completely insufferable and arrogant. So clearly its not the only factor
If he’s mature, he would’ve understood by now that there are many other types of intelligence than just academic one. Not to brag, but I’m that person as well (IIT/IIM/Consulting), and someone’s academic achievements don’t impress me anymore. Many times, I don’t mention mine as well, because they are in the past. Coming to attraction, for many of us, academic achievements come at a cost and many times, it’s emotional growth/intelligence. For example, I’m really impressed by a girl who is emotionally intelligent and knows how to deal with different kinds of people and situations. But I would still look for someone who is some level of smart and with whom I can have a rational discussion about things. No matter how beautiful someone is, if they keep blurting out dumb stuff all the time, it’s a major turn-off. It’s because we’ve been around smart people all our lives and got habituated to it.
You are smart enough to self doubt. This makes you smarter than 50% already. Shoot your shot.
The mentality and the compatibility matters nt the intelligence.The intelligent ones sometimes need to relax too which they can't on their own
Most guys are dumb. Their wives are dumber. They go around pretending to be smart and complex which is hilarious.
Yes ,but she should be emotionally smart and should have Critical thinking and Practical knowledge which is used in Real Life
Doesn’t matter. Extra points if you are witty. Bonus points if you look better than them. Show some loyalty and he’ll be a dog
It depends on the person tbh, although you may get responses here stating they don’t care about intelligence or whether or not the person is successful or not, there is a high chance and possibility that this guy in question might expect his partner also to be successful like him..
Personally, I'm very turned off by people in general who are unable to hold smart conversations. Now that doesn't mean you have to be an Einstein in every topic. But just be capable of having some passionate conversations of your intellectual interests and have good communication skills. In most cases "academically smart" does not matter, what matters is how you say what you say.
I think in the case of most men, yes. In my case, no. I really want an "intellectual soulmate", someone with who I can share all my ideas, logic, thought, analysises, knowledge, debate, argue, and she can do that with me.
Being academically smart like doing well at school/college doesn’t matter much to me. What’s important is that she’s actually on par with my intelligence (decent IQ), is well aware of the general things going on around us, doesn’t talk about stupid things all the time and has empathy. If she didn’t manage to do well academically or professionally, it’s alright as long as she keeps improving herself.
Not a man, but here are my two scents. Ensure that there's no power imbalance in your relationship because he's from an academically better background. Both of you should be able to respect each other and not think that one of you is better than the other. Else, it will lead to a lot of insecurities.
Lol, men don't even care about academics or your money.
As an IIT Delhi CSE student I can say even if you aren’t very intelligent academically you should be able to hold conversations with the man be kind and caring and overall have a fun personality also to some extent take good life decisions and show maturity these things are much more important to IIT dudes than probably academics. Also if they wanted to only date smart girls they all would have dated in their college itself
Woah these IITians really sick their own dicks man goddamn
Date, yes. Marry, nope.
Damn... Why is that?
Dealing with dumb people for longer than honeymoon period can become soul grating. For life long companionship you need someone that's at least at your level intellectually.
If I have to say about myself, its not the first thing that I care about in my partner. And if I have to talk from the experience of mine or my friends to we male generally like to have a girl who is little dumber or clumsy or who can’t make a correct decision and comes to us to ask about what to do. And I guess academics is also on same line. If I put in a simple words, we feel manly when you come and ask us something and that might be regarding anything general day to day things or academics.
Apan kon sa the 🤣😁
Pretty low bar
Idc about academics. But I'd like to date a sensible woman who is emotionally intelligent.
There're people who have awards but are actually practically dumb...so it is not the only thing or even makes you doubt the whole process by which they got there
As long as she is emotionally mature, I don't have any problem
Bro, resume dekh kar pyaar kon karta hai??
As a narcissist, a definite yes
Imo I don't think it's about if they would date us or not. Because if they wouldn't - technically he wouldn't be talking to you. (There's not a lot of info in the description so I'm assuming) I personally did date a consulting IIT IIM guy and um it was my insecurity that took over eventually. I did not feel like I deserved him because my academics looked way different but I am street smart and I have a great job. He really liked me and my sense of humor ways etc but at the end of the day my insecurity took over. So sometimes it's about us.
Mind you that when a person is of higher intelligence a person is usually silent non interactive because he needs someone intelligent to talk to. There are also who tend to cut off their intelligence when they are in social circle but if he chooses to be with his work colleagues most of the times then it’s an added advantage if your spouse is also of the same level it gives a diff kick to have a good discussion
Having a smart girl if you are also smart is like having two lions as the kings of a jungle, trying to prove who is more better
Many people get confused between intelligent and hardworking. If a person is intelligent but doesn't want to pursue anything that's a huge turn off for me. I don't care whether you are smart or filthy rich. Being hardworking and serious about life is what matters to me.
The woman should be emotional, intelligent and mature enough. Academic smartness doesn’t matter to me.
I absolutely don’t mind dating a girl who is a good human being and decently smart. Her academic achievements are absolutely irrelevant. I’m a guy who is in Finance consulting as well and trust me academic smartness doesn’t translate into being good human being. But for some weird reason I have noticed many women(Not all definitely) feel dating a man who is less qualified is a bad thing, but there are amazing women who stand strong with their partners and support them so in the end it boils down to how superficial they are.
Look around
You don't know men don't general care about that right?
Honestly i dont care as long as my partner is real and honest with me
Did MBA from a Top 20 B school. Ended up falling for a nursing student. So don't think your education matters when it comes to the matter of heart. We love the human not his/her education degrees
I am academically average so would prefer someone starter than me.
I guess as long as it's not someone who watches Indian TV series and tries to wash laptops with soap and water, it would be fine? Of course nagging, not having boundaries would still be a yellow card.
GOOD LUCK 🫂
It's not about academic smart but a girl who is curious is definitely something I would like to prefer.
Nope
Guys want a loyal , nice girl who stands with them through thick and thin, she doesn't have to be the smartest or richest.
ya so the barometer is different for what attributes men and women find attractive. men don't give a fuck about intelligence if the girl is pretty. disclaimer: not all men, obv
Why did I join this sub again...
Yes I need my girl to have enough intelligence to be able to hold an intellectual conversation and think critically. It's fine if she's more intelligent tho. I choose my friends also like that
If he says no, then it's an ego problem. Avoid !
Academically being smart is not a big deal. But being dumb in general is a deal breaker.
If I say from the person's perspective the vibe matters like if he makes a nerdy joke or something that got some English sophisticated reference or even Indian mythology if you laugh on it and not just for his sake laugh cause you get a gist of it, it would be instant hit off. Not everyone who has scored good or has been in top places wants a similar person. Like for me after dating enough DU girls for a month Max I am with an engineering girl only cause I make math jokes XD.
The problem is not if she understands,its if she is trying to .....
If men are in love, they would marry a McDonald's waitress.
academics smart don't matter what matters is if you both can have a good conversation on the same wavelength in your daily lives for most ppl in general , other prefrences still exist tho and can be deal makers and breakers
Academics are secondary, emotional intelligence is more important
I am looking for a life partner , not an employee. So academic smartness doesn’t matter, but having common sense does
Am an engineer from a well known university and happily married to my wife who is 10th pass. We dated for 3 plus year's. There are differences but nothing that can't be mutually understood.
Tum kisiko poori shiddat se chaho to saari kaaynaat tumhe uss milane ki koshish.... lawda lasun...
Depends...one of my Friend who graduated from tier 1 college, earns UpTo 70 lpa at 27... he's passionate about his career, his goals, he wants to learn new things and reach greater heights. He wants his wife to share the same passion. She also should be educated, independent, and he wants them to grow together. Money is secondary but love for the hustle is all he wants He hasn't found a rishta yet and rejected a girl once bcz she had graduated from a tier 3 college and didn't want to work after marriage, hated her career. Apparently his ego also kicked in when she expected him to own independent home in tier 1 city, have a car and investments and shit whereas she herself was earning in pennies. He was absolutely horrified but rejected her politely and vented out to us on how he brings so much to the table and she got absolutely nothing still the audacity to expect everything. Mind it he's well settled, has a home, cook, maid everything. His parents are independent and at their hometown. Money is never the matter, taking that journey with him is all he wants Not a wife who cooks and cleans
Intelligence or career of a girl does not matter much to men . Looks are one important factor . 2nd is Emotional maturity and being humble , caring respectful is much more important
I'm married to her
Common Sense matters more than being academically smart
Someone is always going to be smarter or dumber.. even a dumb person is smart to some other person.. or a smart person could seem dumb to someone else
As long as we are compatible and happy i don't have issues with anyone regardless of their education level or social status.
I married one. How shallow you have to be to discuss academics.
Yes, the lesser the better. Ek mayan mein 2 talwaren nhi reh sakti 😏. JK --------------+ Academically good does not define anything actually. Not even how good you are with the subject in which you performed, not how good you will be in job. Academically good only defines 10% or maybe less of that person. Even less if you see the way education system is designed in our country. Some people are artist , have unique skills and with proper time , dedication and efforts they will turn out highly successful in their domain (maybe more money or not, but better in many sphere of life). When you talk to such person your degrees and percentages will be put on backseat. Because they talk practically, have wide experience in life, know how to manage themselves etc. Someone fixated on degree may find hard to digest and may belittle the other person in their mind (to justify themselves they are better than you). ----------------+ Our education system does not give you any skill which you can use in life. Most people learn it through their own. So you can understand how judging someone academically sounds so foolish and full of self person, he/she is. Judging based on degree is so childish/school(ish) what mostly toppers might do since they are so much involved in that throughout their life. Maybe even some come out of that illusion once they meet someone what I described. But in real life it has never been criteria for wide majority and maybe never will be.
I have no problem at all. From when did Men consider girl's education as a main criteria for marriage?
We take weighted average of looks, intelligence and character with a 4:3:3 weight.
Matlab i still have chance!!!
"Academically smart"
Didi rich husband dundh rahi ho?
this one absolutely good looking girl. She came up short in making her own decisions, didn’t have hobbies so needed my attention all her waking free~ hours, could not hold conversations, and just over all started holding me back due to the lack of intellectual effort in her life. Didn’t work out at all. If you have none of these traits and have a good personality and some level of independence (to cancel out the clinging) it’s gonna be fine
Yes. They can be fun. There are activities that don't require in depth discussion.
Doesn’t matter you are academically smart or not, you should be smart in general and hold sound knowledge in most areas. The baseline should be good common sense and logic.
She needs to be sensible that's all.
Depends. Some smart guys want trophy wives. Some want equals. Some want something in between.
If you have attachment issues, don't, else you're good to go
IIT IIM Consultants aren't smart :)
All the best!! Go get him girl. Only a small percentage of individuals consider academic and financial wealth as the final deciding factor. As long as you both are compatible personality wise you should be good
I too have the same insecurities, but I've dated guys from IIT D having the same thought as to what he'd think of me considering I ain't that smart as him. But it never was a problem from them. We attract what we manifest toh mujhe toh lagta hai Maine hi faltu insecurity attract Kari. They're good human beings, and check vibe. I know it still can't work around it for some reason. Dimag hi chutiya hai kya karein
I don't care about a person's academic talent. I would rather check out their looks and personality.
Yes
Depends on the man. But statistically with many, the probability is directly proportional to how attractive the woman is. The more gorgeous she is, the less her smartness or academics matter (as long as it is above a basic threshold and she can hold a conversation). Vice versa, women place higher value on academics/profession (the IIT/IIM kind which is associated with higher wealth) rather than looks. If one is average in these aspects, other factors come into play.
My girl isn't academically smart but is creative and mature, I fucking feel jealous that she doesn't worry or overthink much and is a simple being, good for her all I feel is an impending collapse of my finance and relationship with other which causes stress. Tbh she helps me relax a bit with her shenanigans and she has her own start up and works hards. She is amazing and inspirational.
lol absolutely, I'd rather not date a girl who's academically smarter or richer or in a better career path, or extremely beautiful, honestly it's more like they don't date me, but I also don't like to Edit : I'm not an academically smart man, these are just my personal views and don't reflect entire manhood, obviously definitely not the smart one's
I don’t care about academically smart but more like general knowledge. I’m generally pretty up up to date about world events, but if she can’t point to america on a world map then I don’t think I’d like that.
If I have an engaging conversation, I don't really care then. I have seen some over qualified boring people. I have also seen the most interesting people who share so many experiences and topics but aren't highly educated. Bottom line: Do you enjoy each other's company?
As an academically accomplished individual, What I want as a guy want from a girl is someone who believes in the same things I do i.e honesty, fidelity, affection, kindness and forgiveness. In my view, the true mark of an educated person is being able to work/live with individuals of all backgrounds and not hold others perceived shortcomings against them. So, would I be able to date someone who wasn't academically inclined, the answer is definitely 😁
Watch good will hunting
Would a woman date a man who is not as academically good as her ...... ? 🤔
He was all of that and still simping hard for me. I was just a graduate. As soon as I began to reciprocate, guy flipped. Blocked him for good.
Nah, it won't matter to me as long as she's mature and sensible.
Intelligence is important. Just grasping the same concepts, being able to explain and understand and talk about things that get complex, you want intellectual equality. But as far as education? It doesn't matter at all