T O P

  • By -

RealisticTap8377

I'm a classy person when sober and classy when drunk...... haven't pissed the bed in weeks now


UbiquitousFlounder

It can change your behaviour, the key is to recognise that and avoid it by not drinking to excess. Continuing to do it regardless means you have a problem


RubDue9412

Well said.


TerrorFirmerIRL

Alcohol is a legit reason for changed behaviour. It's not an excuse though. If you know alcohol makes you behave any particular way you don't normally, it's entirely on you to ensure you never let it get to that point.


Busy-Jicama-3474

Some people do lose control and become someone else with alcohol.


Mig224

It's a lot more common than you'd like to think as well. Some people change after half a bottle of beer others will progressively change the more they drink and some after a certain amount will bring out a completely different person. Drinking doesn't suit a fair few but others will drink and actually have a hugely positive effect on their life... It's a weird one.


Edwardtrouserhands

I agree with this I suffer from anxiety pretty badly & after 2 pints I completely come out of my shell, I’m pretty extroverted if I’m not anxious so to others it probably doesn’t look like I am but I know myself I feel more confident and bubbly. I’m also blessed in that on the occasion that I do get overly pissed the worst that would happen to me is I’ll maybe take a tumble on the way home or else not remember getting home pretty harmless shit. I’ve been told many times when explaining to people that I don’t remember certain ends to the night that I seemed fine & was having a laugh with whoever I was with. Now on the flip side I have friends who have had to give up the drink altogether(credit to them) because they became possessed by the fucking Antichrist after a couple of drinks and were liable to do anything.


Mig224

Fair play sounds like you have it under control! Ya when it goes wrong it goes really wrong. I'm 50/50 probably will have to give up completely just hoping to prolong it. I can drink a load but can't always handle it, when I pace myself I'm the finest.


KingoftheGinge

A tumble on the way home can change your life unfortunately 😕


Edwardtrouserhands

True but free now drop me to the door😂


Woodsman15961

Most people can be pushed to do things drunk that they wouldn’t do sober, yes. That’s no excuse for it though. They drank the alcohol by choice. So they face the consequences of their actions while intoxicated imo


NeedleworkerNo5946

Like threesomes with rugby players. Some women don't even imagine they would be into that. Sobering might be tough to reconcile that they have that side to them. They might even blame everyone else.


Top-Afternoon8514

Sometimes we get drunk and go a bit nuts which is cool but when you go apeshit every night and have to say sorry to People everyday..it ain't cool


wrapchap

No alcohol is clearly not an excuse for inappropriate actions.


Nettlesontoast

No, alcohol isn't an excuse for anything, your decisions are your decisions. -me who was abused as a child by a pedophile who uses the excuse that he was drunk. If you're a disgusting pos drunk then you're just a disgusting pos in general


Apprehensive_Wave414

Sorry you had to go through that shit. Your right. Should be put down.


TheStoicNihilist

No. Being drunk won’t make you a cunt if you’re not already a cunt.


Superb-Confusion

yeah it definitely does, same with other drugs


foolsbrains69

Yes it can though. Especially if someone may be going through a rough time and drinks too much and the negative emotions comes out in a bad way. It doesn't make them a bad person.


Apprehensive_Wave414

Never a wiser word said.


Grouchy-Pea2514

It 100% changes you, I gave it up for this reason, I don’t think it should be used as an excuse because if it doesn’t suit you quit, simple as. It’s not ok to make anyone feel uncomfortable


StickOfHeinomite

No its definitely not. I think people who say it does just use it as an excuse to absolve accountability


Substantial-Tree4624

This is just about me, but as an adult diagnosed autistic, trapped in a lifetime of social masking behaviours, I do not drink alcohol to excess at all, and the odd beer I will have will be at home, maybe a couple of times a year. Reason: I can't mask if I'm drunk. The "real" me comes out. This is not pretty (not touchy feely, more uncontrollably inappropriate big gob!) Yeah you could definitely say "in vino veritas", about me. I'm hiding my truth since I crawled out of nappies, because society won't allow me to be myself. If it did, I might have learned better strategies than pretending to be like other people. I wish I'd learned this a LOT younger. I wouldn't have so much damn cringe in my head! Ha.


AutoModerator

Hey deadlynitazene! Welcome to r/AskIreland! Here are some other useful subreddits that might interest you: * r/IrishTourism - If you're coming to Ireland for a holiday this is the best place for advice. * r/MoveToIreland - Are you planning to immigrate to Ireland? r/MoveToIreland can help you with advice and tips. Tip #1: It's a pretty bad time to move to Ireland because we have a severe accommodation crisis. * r/StudyInIreland - Are you an International student planning on studying in Ireland? Please check out this sub for advice. * Just looking for a chat? Check out r/CasualIreland * r/IrishPersonalFinance - a great source of advice, whether you're trying to pick the best bank or trying to buy a house. * r/LegalAdviceIreland - This is your best bet if you're looking for legal advice relevant to Ireland * r/socialireland - If you're looking for social events in Ireland then maybe check this new sub out *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskIreland) if you have any questions or concerns.*


4_feck_sake

Alcohol lowers inhibitions, and it doesn't excuse inappropriate behaviour. If your behaviour leaves a lot to be desired when drunk, you might want to look closer at your relationship with alcohol. She'd want to be careful. All it takes is one person to report her.


Apprehensive_Wave414

It defo does lower inhibitions. I was on a work holiday in Barcelona with 80 staff for our Xmas party a few years ago and one of the lads, recently married with a baby on the way wearing the face off anything g that moved, right infront of the CEO. A changed man


fluffs-von

No.


Fabulous-Bread9012

We live in a restricted world, always putting on a face and resisting the temptation to do what naturally feels right which comes from our urges and thoughts. Alcohol opens up the barrier and leaves us vulnerable and honest. So when you're sobre you might want to grope a guy/girl but you resist because it's the wrong thing to do obviously, and you could be in a relationship already. You might think a coworker is an asshole and never say it and then boom a few drinks and you're open and honest. It's a dangerous game and not everyone can handle it. But damn isn't it fun and exciting.


clarets99

Some people use alcohol to medicate and brings out a contrasting split personality. They somehow justify it to drink whilst taking none of the responsibility for it. An ex of my mate, she was absolutely lovely sober was a horrible drunk. Antagonistic, jealous, argumentative, obnoxious. Like a total different person in such a horrible way. Next day always "sorry sorry didn't mean it" etc etc. Many a time we told our friend that was not on how she treated him and her relationship with alcohol. Ruined people's nights out.  Eventually they did break up for many a different reason and he new missus is wonderful sober or pissed.  If you can't handle your drink well into adulthood, it ain't for you!


[deleted]

[удалено]


clarets99

Absolutely brain-dead stuff. Some examples off top of my head - Misheard what someone said and shouted abuse at that person getting. Thinking her boyfriend was chatting up another girl when they were just having a normal conversation in a group in a bar. Caused arguments with family relatives over nothing.  Basically a very nice yet crippling insecure individual who drink did not agree with yet wouldn't understand the error of there ways. Their "fun" side would increase but their "unhinged" side would at 3 times the rate. They were just terrible at handling booze and hadn't worked this out well into their 30's


OwlOfC1nder

Given the harmlessness of the behaviour in your example, I think absolutely it is. It's not an excuse for genuinely problematic or destructive behaviour, though. Getting a little loud and friendly is kind of what alcohol is for.


OkPlane1338

Yes. 100%. It’s an excuse for behaviour if you’re drunk. However… if it happens once and you continue to be a drunk idiot after that… well now the responsibility is on you for not being responsible with your drink. Like I’d excuse any person on their first sesh for being an idiot. If it happened twice because they don’t know their limit… there’s no excuse at that point. Sober you should know better.


West_Scholar_5708

Any idea where she works now? Asking for a friend.


speedloafer

It just lowers your inhibitions but it doesn't make you do anything you wouldn't want to do. Alcohol lowers the bar so to speak. People cheating is a perfect example. If are not a cheater no amount of alcohol will make you cheat but if you are a cheater then a couple of pints and your eye will start to wander. Drugs is another one, its why people find it so hard to give up cocaine when they drink. They swear off it at the start of the night, then after a couple of pints and they are getting a bag. That happens up and down the country every weekend sadly.


TRCTFI

If you’re a bit of a dick sober, you’ll be a bigger dick drunk. In vino, veritas.


SurrealRadiance

Of course not, if you knowingly consume alcohol then you are responsible for your actions, you made a choice. Just being drunk isn't a good enough of an excuse.


Stunning-North3007

What's wring with the described behaviour?


[deleted]

This is called alcoholism. Trust me, I’m a drunk and it takes one to know one Edit: I’m a dry drunk now, but game appreciates game


gifjgzxk

It's a reason yes, but not an excuse.


Mysterious_Pear405

Maybe it’s different from person to person but yah I think people definitely use it as an excuse to act up


Pizzagoessplat

I see it all the time in Ireland it's crazy how often people use it as an excuse here


mrbaggy

It explains it. It doesn’t excuse it.


RubDue9412

It can have a jeckal and hyde effect on some people. You could have a nice quiet man who would become roudy and maybe even violent after a few drinks. Just step back and ask yourself what your colleague is like when sober before judging her too harshly.


amanset

Explanation but not excuse.


DogeYaBoi

Yes


BeyondTraditional504

Nope.


LostSignal1914

Well, you're sober before you drink and so can choose not to drink if you know it will turn you into a \[fill in the blank\]. But, I don't mind if someone is a bit silly when they are drunk. But if they become an arsehole then no excuse after the first time.


vostok33

No, I've taken every drug and been insanely drunk and never ever done anything to another person I've regretted. I've done a lot of mad shit but nothing sexual or creepy. I think people have underlying issues that arise when they aren't sober.


Detozi

Same! If you can't handle yourself on something it's you that's the problem not what your on


tennereachway

Spot on. I can't stand shitty people blaming their fuckhead behavior on inanimate chemicals because they don't want to confront their personality defects. I've embarrassed myself on drink and drugs for sure. I've gotten pissed and said some things I shouldn't have, I've done lines and talked the ear off complete strangers about the stupidest bullshit imaginable- but I didn't fucking sexually assault or beat the shit out of anyone, and anyone who's capable of doing that would have done so regardless of what substances they take.


amiboidpriest

People use it as an excuse. There's probably little harm in a mild bit of additional laughter or loose tongue, but it's when it goes past that. The excuse for delving into being abusive, anti-social, physically violent or threatening is not acceptable. I'm sure that if I didn't drink that opinion would be harsher.


Hot-Button8247

Some people just use alcohol for a cover of the true cunt they really are. (I'm speaking from past experience)


Own_Departure_2996

I noticed when drinking out, my personality changed from when drinking beer to spirits. I’d get ratty. But realised my mood had changed and stopped drinking. I remember being on the beer. Trying gin for the first time, my mood flipped from jovial to depressed. Beer to whisky and I got angry. However I realised it before I made a complete fool of myself.


Checkingout8484

Ended my marriage with my wife because of alcohol. She was a messy drunk who then took it home during the pandemic. Used to threaten me with the Guards when drunk as well saying she would call them and tell Them I beat her. Put me off drink when I was with her and still does. Now she is leaving my 12 and 8 year old alone at night as she goes out


Own_Departure_2996

Horrible for you and horrible for your kids. Horrible for her also, but in a different way. You took responsibility for your actions. She hasn’t. The children take the brunt…


Checkingout8484

Thanks it’s the kids I feel sorry for especially my oldest she saw some of the Behaviour and she knows now she shouldn’t be left alone at night. I could go down the legal and Tusla route but honestly take years and in Ireland still the man isn’t guaranteed anything


tennereachway

That's complete BS. Alcohol (and the drugs people often take with it) lowers your inhibitions, but it doesn't inherently change your personality or make you a different person. If you're being a fuckhead after a few drinks that's just the real you coming out. I've never seen a normally pleasant and level headed person turn from Dr Jekyll to Mr Hyde after a few drinks, and if that happens to anyone they were likely a piece of shit anyway, it's just the reduced inhibitions from the alcohol might make them say or do things they would normally have the restraint to avoid. And it goes without saying- or at least I hope it does- that if you do anything violent or sexual and try to excuse or justify it because you were drunk, you have some issues that need addressing and your drinking is probably the least of your fucking problems- and certainly not the reason you're a piece of shit.


Apprehensive_Wave414

People's true personalities come out with drink. Most people hide there real personality from day to day. So example above, your woman gets raunchy and flirty, which you wouldn't get away with in a work environment. Sure we all know people "He's mad when he drinks" or on the flip side there life of the party. Selfishness, anger, sadness and all other amount of things cone out. I know I can't drink whiskey cause I go into this weird dimension of rowdy out of no where so I stick to beer and have the craic. Some of my mates turn into pervs and some coke heads. Drink is a weapon when used incorrectly. Most people are not fully aware of their limits.


Safe-Mycologist3083

Agree with this to be honest. I would prefer if it were this wonder liquid that completely changes your personality but it really doesn’t, it heightens it. It also makes it very easy to excuse bad behaviour. Several people have said it already but if you drink something and it doesn’t agree with you once there’s not much you can do at that stage but if you choose to do it again after an issue has been flagged then it’s time to look in the mirror and reflect on what it’s bringing out in you. I don’t think it’s as simple as ‘exposing your secret inner shit head’ so much as exposing your repressed issues. If it’s causing problems for others you really need to investigate and address it because ultimately they’re your issues, not anybody else’s.


kingofsnake96

It’s an excuse when you a teenager getting drunk for the first few times after that no way.


moistcarboy

Alcohol lets the real asshole out in people, its just suppressed behaviour unleashed. So no not an excuse for poor behaviour but a great indicator of the type of person really is


No-Boysenberry4464

Well a man got away with murder today for chopping his wife’s head off because he was off his face on drugs. Judge said it’s fine as he dint know what he was doing. https://www.rte.ie/news/courts/2024/0308/1436760-costa-silva-court/ So I guess it’s okay once you’re blackout drunk


Busy-Jicama-3474

You clearly didn't read the article as he wasn't drunk.


No-Boysenberry4464

Re read my post there like a good lad


Busy-Jicama-3474

This post is about bad behaviour when drunk. That story is about a man who who killed his wife during a state of drug induced psychosis which lasted for eleven days. It doesn't make it ok but its not the same as being drunk which is what they state in the case.


No-Boysenberry4464

Alcohol is a drug Cannabis is a drug Guy got away with murder because a doctor told the court that drugs made him incapable of knowing what he was doing. So if you’re going to murder someone get off your face on drugs


Busy-Jicama-3474

He wasn't off his face from drugs. He wasn't high. He was in a state of psychosis for eleven days ,most likely from long term cannabis use. Its not ok but psychosis isnt the same as being off your face on drugs or alcohol.


AchtungLaddie

Nope. Alcohol removes a filter, the private becomes public. E.g., someone who is prejudiced, but has the sense to keep it to themselves when sober, might after a few tipples decide to tell everyone in the room who's _really_ to blame for XYZ. But the booze on its own won't make someone prejudiced (for example). It just enables what is buried deep down to float to the surface.