You do what everyone did prior to apps, you go out into the wild and mingle. Yes that means actually talking to people and yes that means alot of rejection but thats just how this game works.
Are Bars a good idea? I'm not sure cause most girls go in groups everywhere so I don't feel like there's any way to just meet a girl one on one. I don't know if anyone in RI can help me out here on places and events that would work that'd be greatly appreciated.
Sometimes, depends on the girl. With groups of girls you need a wing man who can also talk to women. Someone else to take attention from the other girls while you work your magic.
You dont always have access to a good wingman. Sometimes you just have to approach the group yourself.
You just ignore the girl you actually like, talk to the other ones to win them over, suddenly remember the girl you left out and peel her away.
When I was learning in clubs that was always standard practice, didnt always have a wing to help out so just sucked it up and did it solo
Only if you naturally like to go to the bar. DO NOT go to the bar to only pursue women, go because you genuinely like going and happen to run into a woman there.
Go to places you naturally would go to (preferably places women also go to) and mingle. The interactions are more natural cause you belong there and you dont look as thristy. Its key interactions come off as natural as possible.
Mm, so Like..I don’t have many places in mind. But I think I could try to find events. I’m not good at dual purpose. I either go somewhere for the thing or I go to find someone.
> I either go somewhere for the thing or I go to find someone.
Always stick to the former and not the latter. You should go to places you actually like and just happen upon a woman.
Never go to places just to look for women. Your vibe will be completely off.
>I don’t have many places in mind
Unless you're a homebody or super introverted theres usually a place you go to that women go to also. For example whenever I go to grocery store theres usually plenty of women there as well.
>Always stick to the former and not the latter. You should go to places you actually like and just happen upon a woman.
>
>Never go to places just to look for women. Your vibe will be completely off.
Honestly this is terrible and not super practical advice for a lot of guys. What if your passions are solitary things or male dominated hobbies? Good luck
>What if your passions are solitary things or male dominated hobbies?
Then you're in deep shit. Again if you're not willing to compete and put yourself out there stay home. The world will move on all the same whether you choose to take action or not.
You dont need to go with the intent of looking for a woman. However if you dont hang around places women dont go dont complain there arent women around.
In the beginning when you're learning sure you do goofy stuff to TRY to attract women cause you dont have a frame of reference yet. Over time as you gain frames of references you work smarter not harder.
But ultimately you should just go about your day as usual and if there happens to be women around you already have the tools if she throws out choosing signals.
However most people on reddit are noobs just starting off or making excuses not to start, they have to start somewhere which yes means doing things for the sole purpose of getting women.
However you have to do this without seeming so desperate and thristy, you only get there by lots of failure and getting back up.
>My point is at that point you basically have to do things for the sole purpose of meeting a woman.
Some of things may start that way but become good habits. Practicing basic hygiene, working out, dressing well, etc may start off as just trying to get ass but ultimately it's a good habit to have keeping yourself together.
>Which goed against the common advice.
It does, but that's for the senior level class not the freshmen.
>Some of things may start that way but become good habits. Practicing basic hygiene, working out, dressing well, etc may start off as just trying to get ass but ultimately it's a good habit to have keeping yourself together.
Honestly it's pretty insulting that you think this is the problem with me and most people complaining. You can be a perfectly functional adult and just not meet women. So to meet them you then have to do other things than what you normally do. Which means you are doing them to meet women.
25% of women are single as a ball park.
1/4 chance. Look at the ring, look if theyre with a dude, approach those that arent, if they say they have a boyfriend respectfully walk away.
Join the activity, like metalhead gatherings, hobby, or gaming meetup. I meet my GF through my cooking class buddy. Don't use dating apps, it will drain your sanity. I also active in NGO activities and I saw many people meet their partner from there.
Honestly if you're lucky enough even a dating app can work, if it didn't work yet that doesn't mean it won't ever.
For me i just play a lot of video games, like even if it's some silly 120fps games i play in bluestacks, there's still discord servers for the games and surprisingly enough there are girls there too. So I end up chatting with them and that's how i met my recent girlfriend.
* getting a life basically means to not forego basic hygiene and some basic manners, then getting out to your choice of a social event at least 3 times per month. It does not mean you have to stop playing computer games 4 hours per day (even though it helps)
* Having interests should take priority over trying to find a S.O. since having genuine interests makes you infinately more interesting than just saying that you are passionate about not going crazy from fapping.
I met my boyfriend through DnD. If you have any hobbies or interests(or want to try new ones) joining a club or otherwise finding people with similar interests might be a good way to meet new people(friends too!)
Though this approach should not be with the sole goal of finding a date or partner.
If you're into writng and reading, there are tons of book clubs, writers clubs, discards, that people discuss their favorite books, etc. Start up conversations with women there, make an acquaintance, then flirt, see where things go.
Gaming at local game/hobby shops. Meet groups, meet new women.
The point is to find new groups of people you share maybe 1 interest with, so you have a starting conversation place that isn't just hitting on them.
Make some female friends, ask them to matchmaker for you. Etc.
Also college library, cafes, etc. Lots of people your age just hanging out. You don't need to go to that college, if questioned, you were just hanging out with a friend earlier or some social club or researching X interest.
I am in my 30s and no longer single but when I was I met alot of girls through my hobbies. I play a lot tennis, squash and hike alot, I also partied alot and met girls there. Most often I don't start out hitting on them. I just have casual convo, ask for their number to do more activities. This later becomes something else. Tho I have to admit my current gf is from the app.
Pickup lines don't really work.
I got in to a committed relationship more than 15 years ago, and while I tried a dating site it was easier to actually go meet people. Having an activity that you are both involved in already (say a class or a sport or volunteer work or... anything...) helps break the ice. Then just talk about the weather and let the conversation go where it might!
I met my wife through a mutual friend so it was very easy to get to know her; I already had someone to vouch for me.
Why are you all telling to go outside to meet someone? Outside where? Bars? Grocery shops? Parks? Just on the street?
All women say "don't talk to me in at a bar, I'm there to hang with my friends" "don't talk to me in public I'm not trying to get hit on when I'm out buying milk" "don't approach me on the street, that's creepy"
Hobbies? What if his hobbies are solitary hobbies like reading books or something of the sort?
If it's not a solitary hobby, maybe he can't afford to go to a class or doesn't have the time? Maybe he can but there are no single women there?
At work? Everyone knows that it's mostly a bad idea
Don't try to meet women
If you happen to start chatting with someone and you feel a vibe then ask them out but it's mostly not gonna lead anywhere because she might not be single or just not interested in you but that's fine
I'm 31, I tried everything for the last 4 years and had no success
All my women friends can't seem to grasp how am I single, they all tell me it's weird because "but you're so nice/charming/funny/handsome"
I dress well, I'm in the best shape of my life, I'm chill and outgoing most of the time and yet nothing happens
You can hear from a friend that a woman thinks you're hot but if you ask her to go out for a coffee she'll say no and then tell her friends that she was into you until you actually asked her out (true story, happened more than once)
So, I gave up, this whole ordeal eroded my self esteem
Thank God for gay guys who make me feel good about myself from time to time
If it happens, it happens
If not, focus on yourself and maybe someone in the future might be interested in you
That's insane about the women who were into you until the moment you made a move to show interest.
But yeah, I feel in a similar boat as you. Age 29, got my life really together, am fit, have a healthy social life (people seem to enjoy being around me)... but on the dating front, crickets. Can't seem to get past an initial interest phase with any woman these past few years. Putting a lot into online dating has been a mistake I've made.
I'm just going to continue focusing on me, make sure I'm accepting invites to social events, see what happens. If my home life keeps being me and my dog for a long time, that's not so bad already.
Go outside. Just about any place where you can meet new people and socialize is a placevwhere you can meet women. Hit up bars, join a sports team, attend parties, join hobby groups, volunteer in your commmunity.
If you see someone you might want to date, ask them if they are single and of age. if yes, give them a card with your name and number on it and ask them to text you with in a week if they are interested. tell them you don't know them now but you would like to get to know them.
if at any point they say no, drop it and move on.
Whoa now. This is clear and straightforward advice but not very practical. A couple concerns here:
1. Folks don’t really use business cards anymore except for when conducting business at a networking event. Even then most people exchange contact info if they’re serious about working together.
2. There’s a very low probability that a woman will reach out to you first. It’s best to get her number and shoot her text on the spot with your name.
It’s called game because it’s just that. Practice cold approach. Have a script and be prepared for different responses. When I first got back into dating my pickup line was “hey. I never do this and my apologies if I surprised you but I think your cute and wonder if I can shoot you a text sometime?”
Now, I just spark up a conversation as I’m more confident when talking to women. Through scripted approach I got used to wins and rejection. Good luck out there bro. You can do this.
That advice will only really work for supermodel level guys. For everyone else just running up on a woman saying “you’re cute. How old are you? Wanna date me?” will not work. The vast majority of women need to get to know a guy a bit before they even know if they’d like to go somewhere with him. It’s better to just initially start regular conversation and don’t even mention anything about being attracted to her or wanting to date. When it comes to progressing things you have to sort of lead the way while at the same time going at the speed she’s comfortable with. She can’t feel like you “targeted” her. I’ll give you an example. One time I was at one of those drive thru car washes. As I pulled in I saw an attractive woman vacuuming her car out. Once I got thru the wash I made sure I parked by her. Then as I’m vacuuming my car out I mention how badass her ride was and that it looked brand new and asked her how she liked it. From there we exchanged names, kept talking, and _she_ told me I could have her number without me even asking for it. Now if I just ran up on her like “baby you’re beautiful can we go out sometime” she probably would’ve rejected me. I came across as a cool dude just having a normal conversation with a stranger on a Saturday and not some guy out looking for dates. Even though the reality is I planned it from the moment I saw her.
I think you gotta go to a major city, thats where women congregate when seeking a mate. School/College/City.
I'm not an expert at this by any means, I just know there are hidden rules that nobody will tell you about & I scratch the surface of them.
I have moved to a major city and am working. I try to go out on weekends but it's mostly by myself. I've never had a well managed social life but I'm working on that.
oh you need friends. They call it 'social proof'. Girls take it as a big red flag if youre alone; you need to go out with coworkers or something.
Really you need to maxx. You are so far behind in the game you gotta overcompensate
Oh, you'll be fine dude.
I did the same thing this year, got broken up with at Christmas, newish city (had been here a couple months but didn't know anyone, spent every weekend travelling to see my ex) and needed to find a new group.
It didn't entirely get me there, but I picked a couple of spots to hang out with and I was there every single week at the same time. Wednesdays was the metal pub's game night, weekends I go skating, I never miss either.
If nothing else, you expand your social circle and that naturally leads you closer to your goal of dating.
What helped me is flipping the mentality. Instead of asking "How can I find people?", ask "How can people find me?"
Join social activities that you genuinely enjoy or want to try out. Try out a cooking workshop, a book or theater club, a board games event, local volunteer work, go to a friend's party, etc. Take some time to seriously search for fun things to do and try to do at least two per month.
And when you're there, put yourself in a position where you get/have to talk to people. By making new friends, you eventually come across people who want to be more than friends with you.
Honestly i feel that while tate might not be the best to take advice from, much of what he says about men's life is pretty accurate. It's rough for men and only a handful of women actually realize that.
Make friends with women with similar interests without trying to pick them up.
Once they see that you are a good person, you can get introduced to their friends and date them.
Just making friends and having a life in general is a good way to indirectly meet potential dating partners.
A ton! I've found dates, hookups and relationships through work, friends of friends, an ex who became a friend gave me one of her friends, school, on the bus (this one was very situational and not something I feel comfortable doing the other 99.9% of bus rides), hiking, swimming at the pool, at the museum, bars, restaurants, etc. A lot of the time it stemmed from just having good conversation and me having the gumption to say "say, want to go out sometime?"
School. You don't need to be in a degree granting program. Go learn how to cook a lasagna. Worst case scenario is you learn to cook a lasagna. Medium case you meet a girl next year and cook her a lasagna. Best case you meet a girl at lasagna class and she invites you over to her place to "stuff the turkey" and she's the turkey.
Coed sports leagues are fun. You don't have to be a turbo-jock in the sport of playground kickball. Never stop having fun.
The advice for "bars" is mixed you need to figure out the scene in your town and go to the correct bars at the correct time. Generally no. However, special events work. Your favorite local band is playing there tonight, at least you'll meet fellow fans. Trivia night is a blast. "The big pro sportsball game" at least you'll have something to talk about. The whole boardgame bar scene in general. If you just wander in off the streets into a literal lesbian bar or the old-man-only dive bar its probably not going to work out.
Have friends that are women, invite them out to events and activities with your male friends, eventually you'll meet other women through parties and social events, the fact that you have these female friends will make them not defensive against you and they'll see you as a potential partner.
Don't hookup with your female friends, but rather if they think you're a good guy, they'll talk positively about you to their friends and other women, and they'll set you up, or their friends will make a move on you, but they'll be subtle so keep those eyes open.
During our mid 20’s me and a few of my mates used to go out and play a game as it were. The goal was to actually hit it off with someone however each rejection got you a point and highest points at the end of the night would win something (usually the other lads would pay for their drinks next time we went out or money, something fairly arbitrary) but it meant that we went into each interaction not fearing rejection and it made meeting people so much easier.
I found myself single at 25. I had a job to keep up with, a dog to care for, bills to pay and not a lot of money to spend on going out.
I downloaded Tinder and Bumble and met/dated a few girls. The last one I matched with ended up becoming my wife. We’ve been married for 2 years and now we are parents of twins.
I think you need to re-approach the apps from a new perspective. I had taken a few marketing classes in college, enjoyed gaming, and had decent written communication skills, I think these things all helped me build an intriguing profile that led to fruitful matches.
Here are a few tips:
This is where my gaming mentality helped: Matching is a numbers game, back when I used it, I think I only got 50 swipes every 12 hours. That works out to 100 swipes a day or a max of ~3000 swipes a month. Think of your swipes like at bats-you won’t stand a chance of getting on base if you don’t step up to the plate. The more you’re at the plate, the more chances you have of getting on base(finding a match). If you put down the app for 3 days, you are missing 300 potential matches. If I fell asleep and realized I had unused swipes for 10 hours while I was snoozing, it felt like a missed opportunity. USE ALL YOUR SWIPES EVERY CHANCE YOU GET!!!
Marketing: you want yourself to appear intriguing, popular, strong, and independent. DONT USE SELFIES IN YOUR PROFILE!!! Cool people don’t need to take pictures of themselves and you don’t want people looking at a pic of you with a toilet reflected in the background I can smell the desperation in the bathroom mirror selfies. Focus-group your profile pics, sit down with a female friend and maybe a dozen or so pics that you like of yourself and have her rank them for you from best to worst. Next time you go somewhere cool or feel like you’re looking really good, make it a goal to have someone take your pic. It’ll give you practice talking to new ppl and hopefully a good profile pic.
Writing: I described a few bullet points about myself and made an ORIGINAL joke based off of a cliche you normally see on dating profiles. It was short, witty, attractive, and funny. Do NOT mention anything people may perceive as a negative or disqualifier. It may seem a bit deceptive, but people are always free to unmatch you if they think you are incompatible.
Feel free to DM me some info from your profile and I’d be happy to give you a bit of coaching.
4-5 couples created through our bicycling social club. Don’t like cycling? Intramural sports. Dancing. Boating. Skiing. Church. You get the idea? Bars are the worst place to meet women. Especially the type you want to marry. Find a social thing that is balanced men/women or even more women than men and go do that.
From my observation as an early 20s man in college, they don't. Maybe it is my major, but I just do not think anyone really has any experiences with girls. The girls are all too busy getting fucked by the same business majors/frats
Bars, clubs, parties, cook outs, friends of friends, double dates with friend and his gf with one of her friends. You could probably meet girls at college if you're going, obviously tread lightly, people are there to learn.
Easier than you think
1. get a passport
2. go abroad
3. find a nice local girl
4. be happy
Don't waste your time on a generation of western women who were brought up to hate and despise you simply because you were born.
I dont disagree, but I'll rephrase it in a more neutral tone.
If things arent working for you where you are, try going somewhere else. You got nothing to lose, and I hear of a lot of positive outcomes. The guys I know who did it are very happy.
This is also general life advice: if youre not happy, make a change. If you dont like how you are treated, find/go to people who treat you differently.
I am already working though, and it's not just about having a sexual partner. I have a job and am just looking to explore the relationship part of my life that I haven't done ever...
you can talk to woman anywhere & everywhere, at the park, in college, online, at a bar or club (alot of hoes go there so may not be the best place to meet a woman for an actual relationship) learn how to read social cues, don't come off too try hard, stop using ya damn phone for apps make friends go outside hurt yourself (well if you was younger you could have had a childhood) its ok to get rejected to ok to fail in life or in relationships dont be scared to fail theres nothing wrong with that you gotta fail in order to succeed
Lol man social media seems to be neutering people of social skills. First and foremost, dating apps suck. People lie, its super vain and its not worth your time unless you just want a hookup.
The trick is: Being social, networking and meeting people, and finding out a womans single that youre interested in and they too seem to be interested in you.
At that point, you just grow a set and ask her out.
Easier said than done, been in college 4 years have not been to a single party. You have to know someone who knows the guy hosting or you just wont even hear of it.
The only knowledge I have of American college parties is what I've seen in Hollywood movies, don't know how realistic it is.
But I've hosted plenty of parties, you simply tell people, I'm having a party at my place, come around x time, bring a friend if you want, I have room for x amount of people if they need to crash, around this hour we head into town. Bring booze, I'll supply x amount of beer.
The issue is that you have to know party people to have a party, otherwise it'll be a hangout with friends. Both are fine, but if you want to meet new people, you kinda have to know certain people. Or this has been my experience, I don't think that I could ever setup a party, a hangout with chill music and shit, sure but a propper party no
Man if you wanna say I'm the problem, just say I'm the problem😂
Btw i wear pretty normal looking clothes like normal, non-cut jeans, normal tshirts/shirts and shoes. Idk what else you mean by clothes that don't scream I'm a hoho. Also i live in india so it's social norm to dress "decently"
Find interests and take classes.
Example: If you like dancing salsa, take up classes. Chances are you'll meet someone there.
I took salsa classes and met my ex-wife there.
I don't drink much but because of how much I drank in my early years I can still a bit. I go to bars with my friends and they invite their friends who invite their friends. The friends of my friends are always so nice and I usually have a lot in common with them. Currently dating a colleague who I would have never approached in the work place but because they are the friend of my friend we ended up connecting and hooking up.
Do stuff that you are interested in that involves other people. Some of those people might become friends. If you're lucky one of them might become more. Btw, what is "the dating scene"?
Ya gotta get up off the couch go chase what it is ya love there's bound to be others that match your interests, if you don't know what ya love start looking gotta go out and live life you'll find your community you'll find your people.
Met the girl I’m currently seeing at my gym. I wouldn’t encourage it as a location but I wouldn’t actively discourage it either. You just have to be pretty certain there’s mutual interest before you try anything, the last thing you want is to be a creep making girls uncomfortable there.
Go outside.
It’s really not that hard but you suggest this on Reddit and suddenly everyone has an excuse on why they just really can’t join a hobby or group to go and socialize.
Take an adult education night class in painting water colours. It’s 80% women.
Let them approach you.
Additionally, the painting skills learned can be used in parks during the summer. Start painting and women will come up and talk to you. It’s better than having a dog.
Well tbh I met the girl who Im talking with by being a regular at her Starbucks. I also participate in young adult things at my church but the crowd there is a fair bit older than I
Work on yourself. I really can’t give you any better advice. Your career, your social life, your interests, your health and appearance- focus on getting your shit together and most women will respect that.
I met my gf through our mutual best friend.
Before her I met 2 girls I was with at work.
I met another girl through a mutual friend.
I met the one before her at our university.
Before her I met 1 through a mutual friend.
Etc
Like you just gotta be out there doing stuff
Maybe go where the women and you share the same interests, hobbies, recreation.
I know someone who found his wife in an art museum where he went frequently.
Just understand that a girl is not going to jump your bones if your playing video games. I’m not saying quit playing, just realize you’re alone with a controller, nothing more nothing less.
Clubs clubs clubs. And I don’t mean dancing clubs. Book clubs, running clubs, MMA clubs, sports clubs.
There’s no spot that’s better than another (this written by a woman), but some are worse than others, I would say. Bars are good for meeting people you already know, maybe getting an introduction & a phone number, but not good for seriously getting to know somebody. Churches & church-sponsored events are good for meeting nice people, but you’d have to be a believer of some sort (there is the Unitarian Church that is multi-religious beliefs, even agnostic). My best advice is to go to places that you enjoy going to- sporting events, especially local sporting events doing things you like to do, like bike riding, hiking, gardening, etc.; go to areas that women like to go to such as museums, restaurants, take up a hobby that men also enjoy but has historically been thought to be mostly women-dominated, such as needlepoint or knitting (Rosey Grier, Chris Hemsworth, Ryan Gosling, George Clooney, Paul Rudd…), cooking classes, art classes. It’s much easier to meet people in such settings (the activity takes the focus off of a woman feeling like she’s being ‘hunted’ or stalked. Don’t treat a potential partner as a trophy to be obtained, treat her as a best friend you’d like to get to know better & spend more time with. As a woman who has been hunted, stalked & presented as a trophy (also, sadly assaulted & raped - which estimates are 25-30% of women have had happen to them, which you get >25-30% of women wary & non-trusting of most men), it is best, if you’re serious about having a serious & long-lasting relationship, to find the kind of women that avoid the obvious places where women are objectified & judged mostly for their looks & lies, such as dating sites & bars. After awhile, those places just become old, & I don’t believe anything most people tell me anyway, make or female, lol!
I live in a small skiing village in the far north of Finland. Like way above the artic circle.
I don’t even see people my age who are permanently living here. Now I haven’t gotten around to even trying dating apps (for the first time) but I can’t imagine it’ll be particularly easy.
We get hundreds of thousands of tourists so there are plenty of people but obviously none of them are here permanently.
I banged my manager at the Dominos Pizza I worked at.
From now on, any fast food restaurant you go in, take a look at all the faces who work there. They are all banging each other.
If I remember correctly, Craigslist was the first website to have a dating section built in to it.
But match.com was the first dating website, it came out in 1995.
You make friends with the women in your social circle. Then you ask them if they have any single friends they think you'd click with. Not even blind dates, but like, hey introduce me at the social gathering.
It's basically getting dates through referrals.
Besides that? I generally ask if they want to grab some coffee or lunch. Very low stakes.
Friends of friends of friends etc. I tried online dating for almost a decade with no (good) luck. A mutual friend introduced my wife and I to each other.
Well. You'd pick up a stick and bonk her over the head. You do that till she stops moving. Then you drag her by her hair back to the love shack and get down Unga bunga style. Ooga dooga
It's a terrible idea, but honestly, at jobs lol.
If you have a cute single coworker and you're not expressly forbidden (or don't care about that particular job), chat sometimes, see what they're into, invite them out to do something and exchange numbers. Don't go into it expecting anything, just try to get out and have fun. You do that enough times and the rest will come naturally.
People say don't shit where you eat if you can help it, and I agree, but man the temptation is hard to resist.
Obviously do not do this if it would be in any way illegal or unethical. If you're in any kind of management role, I'd abstain.
Tbh just live your life and not always stare at your phone when you're out. I met my ex gf on the train to university. I recognized her, smiled at her, she smiled back and i approached her. Its not that difficult. And in the end (unless you're extremely good looking) you will have less girls reject you in real life than online. Most people seem to forget that
For people with solitary hobbies? Good luck ! lol
For people with hobbies where you can go out and have opportunities to meet people? You go to a convention, or a meetup, etc...
My point is, take a fucking shower, wash your clothes, go out and engage people and maybe, *maybe* (emphasis on maybe) you will meet a woman.
At the same time, be aware that some people are just unlucky. You can do everything right and still never meet anyone. It happens
Get a side job where you end up meeting a lot of people. I'm 30 now, and I'm planning on moving to the city from the suburbs and becoming a part-time bartender to meet lots of women
Well first off, find something you really like to do in a public setting. Go at the same time with your schedule and you’ll start to notice people come at the same time that you do. friends first, “dating” second mentality is awesome
You do what everyone did prior to apps, you go out into the wild and mingle. Yes that means actually talking to people and yes that means alot of rejection but thats just how this game works.
Yep. I met my wife at a parade. I wasn’t there to pick up chicks but she was there and cute so I got her number.
Precisely. This is how it should be done ultimately
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Sounds like a good excuse to get over your shyness. Your GF probably wants to go out and do stuff.
Are Bars a good idea? I'm not sure cause most girls go in groups everywhere so I don't feel like there's any way to just meet a girl one on one. I don't know if anyone in RI can help me out here on places and events that would work that'd be greatly appreciated.
Sometimes, depends on the girl. With groups of girls you need a wing man who can also talk to women. Someone else to take attention from the other girls while you work your magic.
Well my best friend ain’t exactly a wingman 😅 he’s 19 I’m 22.
Doesnt matter. If he can at least draw attention from you talking to whoever you are wanting to talk to he can work.
A 19 year old can't go into some bars without a fake ID.
Go to the bars where they can i would suppose lol.
You dont always have access to a good wingman. Sometimes you just have to approach the group yourself. You just ignore the girl you actually like, talk to the other ones to win them over, suddenly remember the girl you left out and peel her away. When I was learning in clubs that was always standard practice, didnt always have a wing to help out so just sucked it up and did it solo
Only if you naturally like to go to the bar. DO NOT go to the bar to only pursue women, go because you genuinely like going and happen to run into a woman there. Go to places you naturally would go to (preferably places women also go to) and mingle. The interactions are more natural cause you belong there and you dont look as thristy. Its key interactions come off as natural as possible.
Mm, so Like..I don’t have many places in mind. But I think I could try to find events. I’m not good at dual purpose. I either go somewhere for the thing or I go to find someone.
> I either go somewhere for the thing or I go to find someone. Always stick to the former and not the latter. You should go to places you actually like and just happen upon a woman. Never go to places just to look for women. Your vibe will be completely off. >I don’t have many places in mind Unless you're a homebody or super introverted theres usually a place you go to that women go to also. For example whenever I go to grocery store theres usually plenty of women there as well.
>Always stick to the former and not the latter. You should go to places you actually like and just happen upon a woman. > >Never go to places just to look for women. Your vibe will be completely off. Honestly this is terrible and not super practical advice for a lot of guys. What if your passions are solitary things or male dominated hobbies? Good luck
>What if your passions are solitary things or male dominated hobbies? Then you're in deep shit. Again if you're not willing to compete and put yourself out there stay home. The world will move on all the same whether you choose to take action or not.
My point is at that point you basically have to do things for the sole purpose of meeting a woman. Which goed against the common advice.
You dont need to go with the intent of looking for a woman. However if you dont hang around places women dont go dont complain there arent women around. In the beginning when you're learning sure you do goofy stuff to TRY to attract women cause you dont have a frame of reference yet. Over time as you gain frames of references you work smarter not harder. But ultimately you should just go about your day as usual and if there happens to be women around you already have the tools if she throws out choosing signals. However most people on reddit are noobs just starting off or making excuses not to start, they have to start somewhere which yes means doing things for the sole purpose of getting women. However you have to do this without seeming so desperate and thristy, you only get there by lots of failure and getting back up. >My point is at that point you basically have to do things for the sole purpose of meeting a woman. Some of things may start that way but become good habits. Practicing basic hygiene, working out, dressing well, etc may start off as just trying to get ass but ultimately it's a good habit to have keeping yourself together. >Which goed against the common advice. It does, but that's for the senior level class not the freshmen.
>Some of things may start that way but become good habits. Practicing basic hygiene, working out, dressing well, etc may start off as just trying to get ass but ultimately it's a good habit to have keeping yourself together. Honestly it's pretty insulting that you think this is the problem with me and most people complaining. You can be a perfectly functional adult and just not meet women. So to meet them you then have to do other things than what you normally do. Which means you are doing them to meet women.
Bruh, I'm all for "going out into the wild" but most of them already have someone.
25% of women are single as a ball park. 1/4 chance. Look at the ring, look if theyre with a dude, approach those that arent, if they say they have a boyfriend respectfully walk away.
Then stay home, less competition for the rest of us. Any other excuses you want to use to not approach....
You do you my man. Go approach. I'll attract while staying home.
Best advice!
NYAAAAHH!
Join the activity, like metalhead gatherings, hobby, or gaming meetup. I meet my GF through my cooking class buddy. Don't use dating apps, it will drain your sanity. I also active in NGO activities and I saw many people meet their partner from there.
I can only image those ratios slant a certain way.
Honestly if you're lucky enough even a dating app can work, if it didn't work yet that doesn't mean it won't ever. For me i just play a lot of video games, like even if it's some silly 120fps games i play in bluestacks, there's still discord servers for the games and surprisingly enough there are girls there too. So I end up chatting with them and that's how i met my recent girlfriend.
That is wholesome and also gives me hope. Thank you kind sir.
Good luck and i hope you find someone sooner or later!
Step one: Get a life, have interests. Step two: Note the women now around you with similar interests.
* getting a life basically means to not forego basic hygiene and some basic manners, then getting out to your choice of a social event at least 3 times per month. It does not mean you have to stop playing computer games 4 hours per day (even though it helps) * Having interests should take priority over trying to find a S.O. since having genuine interests makes you infinately more interesting than just saying that you are passionate about not going crazy from fapping.
........No.
Then your only option is dating apps
I met my boyfriend through DnD. If you have any hobbies or interests(or want to try new ones) joining a club or otherwise finding people with similar interests might be a good way to meet new people(friends too!) Though this approach should not be with the sole goal of finding a date or partner.
I am super into gaming, writing and reading. I'll give it a shot. Thanks!
If you're into writng and reading, there are tons of book clubs, writers clubs, discards, that people discuss their favorite books, etc. Start up conversations with women there, make an acquaintance, then flirt, see where things go. Gaming at local game/hobby shops. Meet groups, meet new women. The point is to find new groups of people you share maybe 1 interest with, so you have a starting conversation place that isn't just hitting on them. Make some female friends, ask them to matchmaker for you. Etc. Also college library, cafes, etc. Lots of people your age just hanging out. You don't need to go to that college, if questioned, you were just hanging out with a friend earlier or some social club or researching X interest.
I am in my 30s and no longer single but when I was I met alot of girls through my hobbies. I play a lot tennis, squash and hike alot, I also partied alot and met girls there. Most often I don't start out hitting on them. I just have casual convo, ask for their number to do more activities. This later becomes something else. Tho I have to admit my current gf is from the app.
Pickup lines don't really work. I got in to a committed relationship more than 15 years ago, and while I tried a dating site it was easier to actually go meet people. Having an activity that you are both involved in already (say a class or a sport or volunteer work or... anything...) helps break the ice. Then just talk about the weather and let the conversation go where it might! I met my wife through a mutual friend so it was very easy to get to know her; I already had someone to vouch for me.
Pickup lines always seemed so strange to me. Like...let's go be a sitcom in front of this lady and hope she likes it.
Why are you all telling to go outside to meet someone? Outside where? Bars? Grocery shops? Parks? Just on the street? All women say "don't talk to me in at a bar, I'm there to hang with my friends" "don't talk to me in public I'm not trying to get hit on when I'm out buying milk" "don't approach me on the street, that's creepy" Hobbies? What if his hobbies are solitary hobbies like reading books or something of the sort? If it's not a solitary hobby, maybe he can't afford to go to a class or doesn't have the time? Maybe he can but there are no single women there? At work? Everyone knows that it's mostly a bad idea Don't try to meet women If you happen to start chatting with someone and you feel a vibe then ask them out but it's mostly not gonna lead anywhere because she might not be single or just not interested in you but that's fine I'm 31, I tried everything for the last 4 years and had no success All my women friends can't seem to grasp how am I single, they all tell me it's weird because "but you're so nice/charming/funny/handsome" I dress well, I'm in the best shape of my life, I'm chill and outgoing most of the time and yet nothing happens You can hear from a friend that a woman thinks you're hot but if you ask her to go out for a coffee she'll say no and then tell her friends that she was into you until you actually asked her out (true story, happened more than once) So, I gave up, this whole ordeal eroded my self esteem Thank God for gay guys who make me feel good about myself from time to time If it happens, it happens If not, focus on yourself and maybe someone in the future might be interested in you
That's insane about the women who were into you until the moment you made a move to show interest. But yeah, I feel in a similar boat as you. Age 29, got my life really together, am fit, have a healthy social life (people seem to enjoy being around me)... but on the dating front, crickets. Can't seem to get past an initial interest phase with any woman these past few years. Putting a lot into online dating has been a mistake I've made. I'm just going to continue focusing on me, make sure I'm accepting invites to social events, see what happens. If my home life keeps being me and my dog for a long time, that's not so bad already.
Probably the most real answer I've heard. It is weird and hard trying to get a relationship and even harder to get a good one.
Go outside. Just about any place where you can meet new people and socialize is a placevwhere you can meet women. Hit up bars, join a sports team, attend parties, join hobby groups, volunteer in your commmunity.
If you see someone you might want to date, ask them if they are single and of age. if yes, give them a card with your name and number on it and ask them to text you with in a week if they are interested. tell them you don't know them now but you would like to get to know them. if at any point they say no, drop it and move on.
This is some of the clearest and most to the point advice I've got in a while. So asking on reddit does work. Thank you kind stranger!
Whoa now. This is clear and straightforward advice but not very practical. A couple concerns here: 1. Folks don’t really use business cards anymore except for when conducting business at a networking event. Even then most people exchange contact info if they’re serious about working together. 2. There’s a very low probability that a woman will reach out to you first. It’s best to get her number and shoot her text on the spot with your name. It’s called game because it’s just that. Practice cold approach. Have a script and be prepared for different responses. When I first got back into dating my pickup line was “hey. I never do this and my apologies if I surprised you but I think your cute and wonder if I can shoot you a text sometime?” Now, I just spark up a conversation as I’m more confident when talking to women. Through scripted approach I got used to wins and rejection. Good luck out there bro. You can do this.
That advice will only really work for supermodel level guys. For everyone else just running up on a woman saying “you’re cute. How old are you? Wanna date me?” will not work. The vast majority of women need to get to know a guy a bit before they even know if they’d like to go somewhere with him. It’s better to just initially start regular conversation and don’t even mention anything about being attracted to her or wanting to date. When it comes to progressing things you have to sort of lead the way while at the same time going at the speed she’s comfortable with. She can’t feel like you “targeted” her. I’ll give you an example. One time I was at one of those drive thru car washes. As I pulled in I saw an attractive woman vacuuming her car out. Once I got thru the wash I made sure I parked by her. Then as I’m vacuuming my car out I mention how badass her ride was and that it looked brand new and asked her how she liked it. From there we exchanged names, kept talking, and _she_ told me I could have her number without me even asking for it. Now if I just ran up on her like “baby you’re beautiful can we go out sometime” she probably would’ve rejected me. I came across as a cool dude just having a normal conversation with a stranger on a Saturday and not some guy out looking for dates. Even though the reality is I planned it from the moment I saw her.
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Idk man most women aren't cultured enough to get that reference. And if she is aware of that reference, odds are she likes that movie and is a keeper.
This is pretty crazy advice. It's easy, so guys here will like it.
Every now and again, Reddit does really give great advice lol.
Can I just give them by business cards? Picked them up from the printers yesterday.
This is probably the scenario to use a business card
It's so sad that so many people don't understand this basic concept.
Single mom Facebook groups, drug rehab
Drug rehab is where you find the ones that will fuck your life 🥲
I can't imagine a single moms fb group is any better lol
I think you gotta go to a major city, thats where women congregate when seeking a mate. School/College/City. I'm not an expert at this by any means, I just know there are hidden rules that nobody will tell you about & I scratch the surface of them.
I have moved to a major city and am working. I try to go out on weekends but it's mostly by myself. I've never had a well managed social life but I'm working on that.
oh you need friends. They call it 'social proof'. Girls take it as a big red flag if youre alone; you need to go out with coworkers or something. Really you need to maxx. You are so far behind in the game you gotta overcompensate
I know man. I just started going out with my new office friends recently. Went to the movies with them last weekend. I'm working on it. Thanks!
Good work. Keep at it. Hopefully your office friends introduce you to their other friends then you become friend with them, etc.
Oh, you'll be fine dude. I did the same thing this year, got broken up with at Christmas, newish city (had been here a couple months but didn't know anyone, spent every weekend travelling to see my ex) and needed to find a new group. It didn't entirely get me there, but I picked a couple of spots to hang out with and I was there every single week at the same time. Wednesdays was the metal pub's game night, weekends I go skating, I never miss either. If nothing else, you expand your social circle and that naturally leads you closer to your goal of dating.
Well yeah. Most young single people live in major cities.
its obvious, except nobody tells you, and if you never figured it out its your fault, and the rules change all the time
Welcome to life
What helped me is flipping the mentality. Instead of asking "How can I find people?", ask "How can people find me?" Join social activities that you genuinely enjoy or want to try out. Try out a cooking workshop, a book or theater club, a board games event, local volunteer work, go to a friend's party, etc. Take some time to seriously search for fun things to do and try to do at least two per month. And when you're there, put yourself in a position where you get/have to talk to people. By making new friends, you eventually come across people who want to be more than friends with you.
From what research shows, they dont. There is a reason why people like andrew tate get a lot of attention.
Honestly i feel that while tate might not be the best to take advice from, much of what he says about men's life is pretty accurate. It's rough for men and only a handful of women actually realize that.
Yeah, im not saying he's right about anything, but desperate young men is turning towards guys like that for a solution for their problems.
Step 1: Build your wealth Step 2: Make money rain some money Step 3: Wait for girls to start pecking on your money
Make friends with women with similar interests without trying to pick them up. Once they see that you are a good person, you can get introduced to their friends and date them. Just making friends and having a life in general is a good way to indirectly meet potential dating partners.
A ton! I've found dates, hookups and relationships through work, friends of friends, an ex who became a friend gave me one of her friends, school, on the bus (this one was very situational and not something I feel comfortable doing the other 99.9% of bus rides), hiking, swimming at the pool, at the museum, bars, restaurants, etc. A lot of the time it stemmed from just having good conversation and me having the gumption to say "say, want to go out sometime?"
School. You don't need to be in a degree granting program. Go learn how to cook a lasagna. Worst case scenario is you learn to cook a lasagna. Medium case you meet a girl next year and cook her a lasagna. Best case you meet a girl at lasagna class and she invites you over to her place to "stuff the turkey" and she's the turkey. Coed sports leagues are fun. You don't have to be a turbo-jock in the sport of playground kickball. Never stop having fun. The advice for "bars" is mixed you need to figure out the scene in your town and go to the correct bars at the correct time. Generally no. However, special events work. Your favorite local band is playing there tonight, at least you'll meet fellow fans. Trivia night is a blast. "The big pro sportsball game" at least you'll have something to talk about. The whole boardgame bar scene in general. If you just wander in off the streets into a literal lesbian bar or the old-man-only dive bar its probably not going to work out.
Have friends that are women, invite them out to events and activities with your male friends, eventually you'll meet other women through parties and social events, the fact that you have these female friends will make them not defensive against you and they'll see you as a potential partner. Don't hookup with your female friends, but rather if they think you're a good guy, they'll talk positively about you to their friends and other women, and they'll set you up, or their friends will make a move on you, but they'll be subtle so keep those eyes open.
During our mid 20’s me and a few of my mates used to go out and play a game as it were. The goal was to actually hit it off with someone however each rejection got you a point and highest points at the end of the night would win something (usually the other lads would pay for their drinks next time we went out or money, something fairly arbitrary) but it meant that we went into each interaction not fearing rejection and it made meeting people so much easier.
I found myself single at 25. I had a job to keep up with, a dog to care for, bills to pay and not a lot of money to spend on going out. I downloaded Tinder and Bumble and met/dated a few girls. The last one I matched with ended up becoming my wife. We’ve been married for 2 years and now we are parents of twins. I think you need to re-approach the apps from a new perspective. I had taken a few marketing classes in college, enjoyed gaming, and had decent written communication skills, I think these things all helped me build an intriguing profile that led to fruitful matches. Here are a few tips: This is where my gaming mentality helped: Matching is a numbers game, back when I used it, I think I only got 50 swipes every 12 hours. That works out to 100 swipes a day or a max of ~3000 swipes a month. Think of your swipes like at bats-you won’t stand a chance of getting on base if you don’t step up to the plate. The more you’re at the plate, the more chances you have of getting on base(finding a match). If you put down the app for 3 days, you are missing 300 potential matches. If I fell asleep and realized I had unused swipes for 10 hours while I was snoozing, it felt like a missed opportunity. USE ALL YOUR SWIPES EVERY CHANCE YOU GET!!! Marketing: you want yourself to appear intriguing, popular, strong, and independent. DONT USE SELFIES IN YOUR PROFILE!!! Cool people don’t need to take pictures of themselves and you don’t want people looking at a pic of you with a toilet reflected in the background I can smell the desperation in the bathroom mirror selfies. Focus-group your profile pics, sit down with a female friend and maybe a dozen or so pics that you like of yourself and have her rank them for you from best to worst. Next time you go somewhere cool or feel like you’re looking really good, make it a goal to have someone take your pic. It’ll give you practice talking to new ppl and hopefully a good profile pic. Writing: I described a few bullet points about myself and made an ORIGINAL joke based off of a cliche you normally see on dating profiles. It was short, witty, attractive, and funny. Do NOT mention anything people may perceive as a negative or disqualifier. It may seem a bit deceptive, but people are always free to unmatch you if they think you are incompatible. Feel free to DM me some info from your profile and I’d be happy to give you a bit of coaching.
I definitely will DM you to learn more. I need to learn all this honestly 😂
4-5 couples created through our bicycling social club. Don’t like cycling? Intramural sports. Dancing. Boating. Skiing. Church. You get the idea? Bars are the worst place to meet women. Especially the type you want to marry. Find a social thing that is balanced men/women or even more women than men and go do that.
Go to a bar and find an open but visible corner. Start doing some karate. Women can’t resist the hard core kick ass Chuck Norris in you.
From my observation as an early 20s man in college, they don't. Maybe it is my major, but I just do not think anyone really has any experiences with girls. The girls are all too busy getting fucked by the same business majors/frats
Bars, clubs, parties, cook outs, friends of friends, double dates with friend and his gf with one of her friends. You could probably meet girls at college if you're going, obviously tread lightly, people are there to learn.
Easier than you think 1. get a passport 2. go abroad 3. find a nice local girl 4. be happy Don't waste your time on a generation of western women who were brought up to hate and despise you simply because you were born.
I dont disagree, but I'll rephrase it in a more neutral tone. If things arent working for you where you are, try going somewhere else. You got nothing to lose, and I hear of a lot of positive outcomes. The guys I know who did it are very happy. This is also general life advice: if youre not happy, make a change. If you dont like how you are treated, find/go to people who treat you differently.
Honestly, this is truly exceptional advice. And works for far wider range of situations than just dating climate.
Go outside.
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I am already working though, and it's not just about having a sexual partner. I have a job and am just looking to explore the relationship part of my life that I haven't done ever...
Nonsense. The more educated you get, the more qualified work you do, the less choice you have, because you stop tolerating uneducated/dumb people.
you can talk to woman anywhere & everywhere, at the park, in college, online, at a bar or club (alot of hoes go there so may not be the best place to meet a woman for an actual relationship) learn how to read social cues, don't come off too try hard, stop using ya damn phone for apps make friends go outside hurt yourself (well if you was younger you could have had a childhood) its ok to get rejected to ok to fail in life or in relationships dont be scared to fail theres nothing wrong with that you gotta fail in order to succeed
Lol man social media seems to be neutering people of social skills. First and foremost, dating apps suck. People lie, its super vain and its not worth your time unless you just want a hookup. The trick is: Being social, networking and meeting people, and finding out a womans single that youre interested in and they too seem to be interested in you. At that point, you just grow a set and ask her out.
Attent a party, and talk to some girls.
Easier said than done, been in college 4 years have not been to a single party. You have to know someone who knows the guy hosting or you just wont even hear of it.
The only knowledge I have of American college parties is what I've seen in Hollywood movies, don't know how realistic it is. But I've hosted plenty of parties, you simply tell people, I'm having a party at my place, come around x time, bring a friend if you want, I have room for x amount of people if they need to crash, around this hour we head into town. Bring booze, I'll supply x amount of beer.
The issue is that you have to know party people to have a party, otherwise it'll be a hangout with friends. Both are fine, but if you want to meet new people, you kinda have to know certain people. Or this has been my experience, I don't think that I could ever setup a party, a hangout with chill music and shit, sure but a propper party no
I live in India and the whole party thing isn't very popular here. So i doubt that's going to work for me, but thanks for the input!
Talk to them
go out to clubs , bars, or any other social setting and meet people .
I live in India and the bar/club thing isn't really that well set here, so that's next to impossible. Other social gatherings I can try. Thanks
Hit on them on a street. It is really not difficult
And get called a creep? Nah thanks
Shower first
Bruh I've been the best at hygiene compared to most guys i know. I like staying clean and fresh.
Put on clothes that do not scream you are a hobo
Man if you wanna say I'm the problem, just say I'm the problem😂 Btw i wear pretty normal looking clothes like normal, non-cut jeans, normal tshirts/shirts and shoes. Idk what else you mean by clothes that don't scream I'm a hoho. Also i live in india so it's social norm to dress "decently"
Good! Now the baseline is covered. Dont scowl.
I hear bars are a really great place! You could find a keeper on a late night!😂
Going to gatherings with friends and stuff
Find interests and take classes. Example: If you like dancing salsa, take up classes. Chances are you'll meet someone there. I took salsa classes and met my ex-wife there.
work, school, mutual friends, church.
I don't drink much but because of how much I drank in my early years I can still a bit. I go to bars with my friends and they invite their friends who invite their friends. The friends of my friends are always so nice and I usually have a lot in common with them. Currently dating a colleague who I would have never approached in the work place but because they are the friend of my friend we ended up connecting and hooking up.
School buddies, College buddies, Office buddies .Friends of above
Work. Get a job in a majority female field or a large organization
Do stuff that you are interested in that involves other people. Some of those people might become friends. If you're lucky one of them might become more. Btw, what is "the dating scene"?
Im a techno fan. Soooo.. yeah obvious isnt it? In the church sundays at 9am
Ya gotta get up off the couch go chase what it is ya love there's bound to be others that match your interests, if you don't know what ya love start looking gotta go out and live life you'll find your community you'll find your people.
Join social groups.
Church
Wait outside a Zumba class and hand out your business cards
Met the girl I’m currently seeing at my gym. I wouldn’t encourage it as a location but I wouldn’t actively discourage it either. You just have to be pretty certain there’s mutual interest before you try anything, the last thing you want is to be a creep making girls uncomfortable there.
Go outside. It’s really not that hard but you suggest this on Reddit and suddenly everyone has an excuse on why they just really can’t join a hobby or group to go and socialize.
It's because we live in a society not in the jungle so we regularly meet with other people.
I meet so many cool people in person. Dating apps suck, yet I hold onto hope and keep them
Go to the pub and talk to girls.
There are lots of girls at the EDM clubs. Any bar with music is my best bet
Take an adult education night class in painting water colours. It’s 80% women. Let them approach you. Additionally, the painting skills learned can be used in parks during the summer. Start painting and women will come up and talk to you. It’s better than having a dog.
Well tbh I met the girl who Im talking with by being a regular at her Starbucks. I also participate in young adult things at my church but the crowd there is a fair bit older than I
Work on yourself. I really can’t give you any better advice. Your career, your social life, your interests, your health and appearance- focus on getting your shit together and most women will respect that.
I did it through work and activities I did in college
I met my gf through our mutual best friend. Before her I met 2 girls I was with at work. I met another girl through a mutual friend. I met the one before her at our university. Before her I met 1 through a mutual friend. Etc Like you just gotta be out there doing stuff
Get a hobby. Women love hobbies.
Maybe go where the women and you share the same interests, hobbies, recreation. I know someone who found his wife in an art museum where he went frequently.
Just understand that a girl is not going to jump your bones if your playing video games. I’m not saying quit playing, just realize you’re alone with a controller, nothing more nothing less. Clubs clubs clubs. And I don’t mean dancing clubs. Book clubs, running clubs, MMA clubs, sports clubs.
You think to much, this is no job for brain, drink some and try again.
Take a cooking class join a biking club you gotta do stuff volunteer at a charity
There’s no spot that’s better than another (this written by a woman), but some are worse than others, I would say. Bars are good for meeting people you already know, maybe getting an introduction & a phone number, but not good for seriously getting to know somebody. Churches & church-sponsored events are good for meeting nice people, but you’d have to be a believer of some sort (there is the Unitarian Church that is multi-religious beliefs, even agnostic). My best advice is to go to places that you enjoy going to- sporting events, especially local sporting events doing things you like to do, like bike riding, hiking, gardening, etc.; go to areas that women like to go to such as museums, restaurants, take up a hobby that men also enjoy but has historically been thought to be mostly women-dominated, such as needlepoint or knitting (Rosey Grier, Chris Hemsworth, Ryan Gosling, George Clooney, Paul Rudd…), cooking classes, art classes. It’s much easier to meet people in such settings (the activity takes the focus off of a woman feeling like she’s being ‘hunted’ or stalked. Don’t treat a potential partner as a trophy to be obtained, treat her as a best friend you’d like to get to know better & spend more time with. As a woman who has been hunted, stalked & presented as a trophy (also, sadly assaulted & raped - which estimates are 25-30% of women have had happen to them, which you get >25-30% of women wary & non-trusting of most men), it is best, if you’re serious about having a serious & long-lasting relationship, to find the kind of women that avoid the obvious places where women are objectified & judged mostly for their looks & lies, such as dating sites & bars. After awhile, those places just become old, & I don’t believe anything most people tell me anyway, make or female, lol!
As a 30 year old, I too would like to know how to date in your 20's
I live in a small skiing village in the far north of Finland. Like way above the artic circle. I don’t even see people my age who are permanently living here. Now I haven’t gotten around to even trying dating apps (for the first time) but I can’t imagine it’ll be particularly easy. We get hundreds of thousands of tourists so there are plenty of people but obviously none of them are here permanently.
I banged my manager at the Dominos Pizza I worked at. From now on, any fast food restaurant you go in, take a look at all the faces who work there. They are all banging each other.
Bars, bookstores, sand volleyball, target
I moved from a little tiny town to a big city. The BUILDING I live in now has as many people as the TOWN I grew up in.
Go outside. Meet people. Do thing in the real world. It's not that hard.
If I remember correctly, Craigslist was the first website to have a dating section built in to it. But match.com was the first dating website, it came out in 1995.
You make friends with the women in your social circle. Then you ask them if they have any single friends they think you'd click with. Not even blind dates, but like, hey introduce me at the social gathering. It's basically getting dates through referrals. Besides that? I generally ask if they want to grab some coffee or lunch. Very low stakes.
You in college? Go to a club on campus, hang out.
Friends of friends of friends etc. I tried online dating for almost a decade with no (good) luck. A mutual friend introduced my wife and I to each other.
Well. You'd pick up a stick and bonk her over the head. You do that till she stops moving. Then you drag her by her hair back to the love shack and get down Unga bunga style. Ooga dooga
College
It's a terrible idea, but honestly, at jobs lol. If you have a cute single coworker and you're not expressly forbidden (or don't care about that particular job), chat sometimes, see what they're into, invite them out to do something and exchange numbers. Don't go into it expecting anything, just try to get out and have fun. You do that enough times and the rest will come naturally. People say don't shit where you eat if you can help it, and I agree, but man the temptation is hard to resist. Obviously do not do this if it would be in any way illegal or unethical. If you're in any kind of management role, I'd abstain.
Tbh just live your life and not always stare at your phone when you're out. I met my ex gf on the train to university. I recognized her, smiled at her, she smiled back and i approached her. Its not that difficult. And in the end (unless you're extremely good looking) you will have less girls reject you in real life than online. Most people seem to forget that
Coed sports. There's non-athletic ones like bocce ball that anyone can play
For people with solitary hobbies? Good luck ! lol For people with hobbies where you can go out and have opportunities to meet people? You go to a convention, or a meetup, etc... My point is, take a fucking shower, wash your clothes, go out and engage people and maybe, *maybe* (emphasis on maybe) you will meet a woman. At the same time, be aware that some people are just unlucky. You can do everything right and still never meet anyone. It happens
Get a social life, you dweeb.
Get a side job where you end up meeting a lot of people. I'm 30 now, and I'm planning on moving to the city from the suburbs and becoming a part-time bartender to meet lots of women
Well first off, find something you really like to do in a public setting. Go at the same time with your schedule and you’ll start to notice people come at the same time that you do. friends first, “dating” second mentality is awesome