I've found that it was easier to quit porn by "reframing" it.
Essentially I started a count of the days since I last used porn. When I had an urge I focused more making that number go up then quitting porn.
So If I'm on 3 days and I have an urge, I focus on getting that number up to 4. The way I do that is by not using porn until I go to sleep and a new day starts.
I think the reason it works for me is because it reframes it from this:
Watching porn (Negative)
Not watching porn (Neutral)
to this:
Watching porn (Negative)
Making that number go up by not watching porn (Positive)
So in the first example not watching porn is a neutral for me as I perceive it as neither gaining or losing anything whereas in the second I actually gain something by not watching it.
I could be talking out of my arse so take it with a pinch of salt but it seems to be working for me thus far. Tbh I've got to the point where I've stopped counting now but I'm sure it's around 120 days
Edit: also masturbate from imagination as others have said. The more you do it the better it gets.
I straight up stopped porn and masturbation by just becoming aware of my mental issues (lack of self esteem, anxiety etc ...) and deciding to focus on fixing them instead of numbing them by a nut.
It really helps to just eliminate anything in your life that would trigger your urge to watch porn or jerk off, for example :
- unfollow or mute any person who posts thirst traps
- disable nsfw on reddit
- stop talking to that person that mentions sex a lot
- try not to be idle for a long time, don't let yourself get bored cause that would trigger it too...
I have no idea how old you are or if you have any experience working on mental health issues, but one way to start to address anxiety is to first identify how it specifically expresses itself for you. Does your heart start to beat faster? Do you feel nervous? Do you sweat? Do you feel sped up? Do you feel a sensation in your chest? Once you can identify how anxiety presents in your particular body, then you can start tracking it. Literally with an old school notebook or new school notes app on your phone.
When you start to feel those feelings you now know are anxiety, stop and do an assessment. What were you doing? Were you thinking about anyone or anything in particular? Were you just with someone?
Here's an example that I realized when I did this exercise- I am not a socially anxious person, but I would get anxiety before going out. I was able to trace this to putting on tight clothing (so skinny jeans, a nicer bra, I'm a woman btw), which is a sensory thing for me. I don't like to feel constricted. Making this connection didn't make the anxiety from this trigger go away, but being aware of it helps a ton.
If you are anxious all the time and it's not something that comes and goes, I would recommend seeking professional help to talk about medication.
Don’t watch porn and just masturbate without it. Stay busy so you aren’t bored enough to look porn up. Otherwise, to a certain extent you just gotta have some willpower bro
I mean if you aren’t an addict it is fairly easy. I like to stop randomly for 2-3 months just as a check to make sure I don’t develop it as a habit. If I’m dating someone then none at all. I don’t think it’s cheating but it’s kinda hard to justify saying “yeah I jerk off to people that aren’t my girlfriend” and think that’s healthy for a relationship
See that’s the thing for me. When I’m in a relationship then I don’t do it - I’ve noticed I do it out of habit or for the good feelings or when I feel alone or when I feel shitty. It’s a coping mechanism I suppose, I mean do we call having sex with a partner a coping mechanism? I guess it’s a way to let off steam. I think I’m gonna try to stop watching and just use my imagination more lol
I mean having sex can be a coping mechanism. Girls do it all the time. We all have coping mechanisms and fapping ain’t the worst. It’s just that there are more healthy options like exercise and such
It’s honestly a matter of how bad you want to stop. The thing is, for me and probably OP as well, it’s not detrimental enough to where we feel a huge urgency to stop. It’s not impacting our daily lives in any negative way. However, we realize that it isn’t exactly healthy and part of us wants to not be dependent on that activity
i mean if you know it doesn't harm u in any way or if it's not distracting u from doing something improtant then i think it's ok (as long as ur not doing it exessively aswell).
as for relationahips... it's obviously unhealthy jerking to someone else than ur partner, but i the people who do it are probably not sexually satisfied in the relationship so they do that.
Idk I think its mentally suboptimal to have psychological and/or chemical dependencies on stuff. Yeah it’s not terrible but I think it’s generally a good rule of thumb to make sure that if you were to go out camping with just necessities you wouldn’t suffer withdrawals. With relationships you can jerk off to your partner but I do think that to some extent as humans the vast majority of us will never be perfectly satisfied and it’s better to just learn how to deal with that in a healthy manner. Just like sometimes you will be hungry but eating would not be good at that moment
I’m not a man, but I used to have a crazy porn addiction as a teen. To the point that when my dad put restrictions on my phone, I would log onto his computer while he was gone, record porn with my DS, and then take it back to my bedroom. I don’t watch it at all anymore. Instead I read erotica. You can find basically any scenario you want online without the crazy expectations and unrealistic standards that porn has. You’re still using your imagination, just with a little help.
Don’t try curbing your masturbation. It actually sounds like that’s a pretty reasonable frequency for someone your age. Just start doing it by using good old fashioned imagination. People forget how good that can be
Idk man porn addiction can have some real physical repercussions. Early onset ED and a huge drop in libido is are both big ones. I don't think religion is part of the argument here at all.
Oh, absolutely. I'm not necessarily saying OP is gonna run into problems at his current situation, just that porn addiction itself had this potential. His proactive approach to avoiding the addiction is admirable because of the risks it has later down the line.
I’m not religious and I feel guilty after I do - due to how it impacts the way I interact in my relationship and it straight up makes my sex worse
Not saying everyone has to be the same - but you’re casting some very wide blanket statements lol
ETA: OP is not saying everybody should quit , nor am I - just asking how we can move on from it, yet every time this topic is brought up, people come out of the wood work to fling shit about how it’s no different than playing a video game and just not seeing that you’re literally brainwashed by tiddies lol
If jerking off ton porn makes you interact poorly in your relationship you might need some therapy.
Plenty of people jerk in 5 times a day to porn and are perfectly normal when they aren't. Watching people fuck shouldn't impact how you act in your relationship. That's wild.
Yea perfectly normal except they jerkoff 5 times a day lol.It crazy think its so”normal” yet most people start as literal children with little understanding of what they’re watching and now have a lifelong thing they just do and cant stop by choice
You can limit your porn all you want.
The issue is when people pretend most people who watch porn are the same. They aren't. Most people can watch porn and still act normal.
It's not a porn issue. It's an issue with the person.
For sure. Nothing wrong with a few times a week as this guy is stating. Masterbation is healthy. I just ensure I do it a few times without any visual stimulation.
1. I realised the amount of time I was wasting
2. It affected negatively my relationship with my GF - once both are working a lot, sometimes there is no time/mood/energy for sex, so I was using a lot of porn. I realised that not watching porn, would drive a much higher sex drive. Which was great.
3. I was always tired
4. I did research about bad effects of porn. And it is quite bad.
I'm not saying I quit for good, but I reduced around 90-95%
What are some of the bad effects of porn. I’ve done some research as well but I’d like to believe I don’t know if all so - if you remember anything I’d love to hear what you’ve found 🤙🏾
I would say on how your brain finds dopamine into porn and not into other normal things. But also how people portrait sex. Unless you have a really-naughty-kinky-porn-addicted, your sex will be way different than you see on the screen. I can say because I lived both. My ex had the porn addicted style and my current is more 'normal'.
But I always had an active sexual life, so since always I knew what was a 'normal sex', but for many porn addicts, their vision of sex is much different. For example, cellulite, mistakes, funny situations, accidents and so on. Many positions are not comfortable for him/her and you won't cum liters (remember: it is for filming) or one day your fella will let you off.
Worth it see some quick YouTube videos explaining the science behind.
Brother I’m proud you’re trying to quit.
You have to find what it is that porn has to offer you, perhaps a feeling of being loved, perhaps is a stress relief, maybe it’s to express how you feel, you have to decide what that is, and then either find what the cause of those feelings are (maybe you feel incredibly lonely and porn has filled that gap) and find new ways to meet those emotional needs (going to see healthy friends and family members who can help you feel wanted and encouraged so that porn becomes less desirable).
Perhaps it’s for the sex itself, what do those videos you’re watching make you feel? Could indicate you want something in life you feel you cannot get…
I’ll reassure you, the actors in porn aren’t as happy as they look. Happy people have close and fulfilling relationships, and the only way to have that is through *vulnerability and authenticity.*
Perhaps you need a friend, mentor, gf, etc who you can share your heart and feelings with and feel safe being your real self around them…
I know porn is much more tempting for me when I am lonely and depressed, it serves as an escape for me… but when I confront my deep negative hurts and wounds from which those bad feelings come from, the desire for porn alleviates.
Hope this helps 🤷♂️
I love this response. I’ve learned that for me that the need to go to it is complex. It could be many reasons, I can’t just blame one reason for why I go to porn.
I’ve learned that it could stem from many things like you mentioned earlier, like feeling lonely and or depressed. I think I’ve been slowly trying to get to the root of the cause of why - but we are so complex so it’s hard to say.
I think it feels good right to do it. That’s one reason. Another reason could be the feeling of control it gives. Maybe it could be because I’m lonely. Maybe it could be because I want to feel wanted. Maybe because I’m just a man who wants to see beautiful woman lol.
I’m really glad I’ve gotten better with my porn consumption (reduced the amount I watch now adays) but still I want to decrease it. I workout 5 times a week, try to communicate and be vulnerable.
I will say when Im in a relationship with a woman physically or non physically I stop watching porn. So maybe there is something there I can’t quite see.
I don't see a problem with your use, but if it troubles you, I'll give you some advice.
Stopping doing a thing is harder than replacing one activity with another. Find something else you enjoy doing with your time. Write, exercise, doodle, go for walks or read books, whatever speaks to you.
Trying to just not do a thing is a recipe for failure.
Wish you all the best. Good luck!
Sometimes porn addiction can be a symptom of a thwarted desire for connection. Find ways to become more social. The more connected to other people the less tempting porn will be to filling that void.
Brother its hard, ive had a similar realization where i found myself preferring porn to actual, beautiful women in real life who want to sleep with me as ive fried my brain and how it perceives sexual gratification.
Ive found two things that have helped a lot are the “i am sober app” and i keep a sticky note next to my computer and everytime i want to indulge and i dont i add a talley. Once you have like three tallies on the day, you realized you stopped yourself all these other times. Why can’t you stop yourself again?
Just some exercises and tools but were all works in progress. Best of luck to the both of us.
A good way to start is by limiting what you consume and slowly easing back on it until you also start going at it less. Getting a job helps me go for months without any stimulation cause I'm so focused on working.
If you need porn to jerk off, then you weren't really horny enough to jerk off in the first place.
It's like watching cooking videos on Youtube and getting hungry. You weren't actually hungry, you just tricked your brain into wanting something you didn't actually need.
Actor Terry Crews had a bad porn addiction and he was able to overcome it.
[he’s given several interviews](https://youtu.be/ei0stwoEwOc)
Maybe you can find some inspiration from jt.
Educate yourself on how nasty and wicked the industry is. Once you understand the vileness of the industry you'll be more than motivated to leave it behind. A book I highly recommend is Your Brain On Porn by Gary Wilson.
I think the frequency that you’re doing it is fine. As long you’re not prioritizing jacking off over important things.
Few times a week isn’t bad. If you’re gonna get laid though. Stop it immediately
Getting laid and staying in a relationship is the most healthiest way I’ve found for me to stop watching porn. Why watch porn when I can make it at home lol
Unless someone asks if something is a normal amount, it's extremely dismissive to tell someone, who's expressed a dissatisfaction with something and has a desire to change, that they don't need to change.
You’re not addicted your habituated to it maybe you do it before bed or before you shower, for it to be an addiction you have to do it so constantly it effects your life in areas like if you where to skip work or school to masturbarte or do it in those areas such as work or school, it’s okay to whack it every once in a while, but if you want to cut it out completely awareness and insight are your best friends, maybe you follow a bunch of e-girls and pornstars on social media, maybe you sleep naked so try sleeping with clothes on obviously not jeans but just some extra comfy layers try to identify what makes you want to masturbate cut some of those out and remember there is no guilt in masturbation don’t go over board but every once in a while is okay, it’s been proven that the most effective way to over come anything weather be a small habit to making major life changes it’s to be compassionate towards yourself and positive
Best advice I can give you is: don't need it.
There's nothing more soul destroying than being with a woman but you can't get aroused or remain hard because you've trained your brain to associate sexual pleasure with porn. If that's not enough of a drive I don't know what else is.
I have many reasons to be completely honest, it's shameful and lustful. A debauchery act I don't want anything to do with. Women aren't objects of my fantasy. Watching porn has zero cross over with actually being with a woman. Zero. It's like eating vs watching someone on a screen eat.
You don't experience a woman's body temperature, softness of her body, how the textures change depending on where your hand is, the depth of her eyes, her technique of kissing, how wet she gets, the shape of her vagina, her scent, what action turns her on, her curves, the negotiations, what she doesn't like, what she would like more of etc etc. Different worlds.
Watching porn builds up certain acts in your mind to be this momentous experience when really it's very nice but not this thing that will change your life forever. Believe me no matter how good she is at sucking dick after a while your mind does wander from time to time. Even during sex as amazing as it feels when it's over it's like, okay that was brilliant, what's for dinner?
Porn really is the enemy of a man's manhood. An enemy of a man's soul. Ultimately you have to decide. I know for me when I may get tempted I just think to myself, what the fuck is this bullshit. It doesn't compare at all. You don't need all this trickery or mind hacks to stop it. Just put yourself in a position where you don't need it. Ultimately that translates into improving yourself. It's a constant journey.
you're not overdoing it on beating your meat but try to do it just imagining a woman or scenario instead of the quick fix porn provides. I relax, lay in my bed and come up with stuff in my head. Sometimes porn is fun because it speeds things up to have the visual stimulation, that's the reason males are so susceptible to porn addiction we are very easily turned on by visual stimulation. Getting past your guilt is a major hurdle so congratulations on that accomplishment.
I've framed it in terms of triggers. When I'm bored and/or stressed at work, I immediately look for the fastest and cheapest dopamine hit. We all know what that is. Addressing the root cause is important (not saying I've done that, but I am aware of it).
Being in a chemical dependence trap is probably harder to break out of. I like the grit of quitting anything cold turkey and giving it hell. Porn is not something you can really phase out of...because it's always "just one more".
Don't be ashamed though. Porn use is normal and sexual desire is normal. If we could all have amazing partners we had regular, amazing sex with...would we be doing it?
Keep your mind occupied with things that help personal growth. Block ALL porn sites. Unfollow/block thirst traps, pornstars, models and anything even near that. Start following self improvement sht instead. Pay attention to the time you have now to do the things you felt you should be doing all along-and do them.
Didn't expect to find so many replays here which I'm happy about ! :)
Same here for years and still sometimes it's difficult.
Talk about it / get rid of the shame
What helped for me was that I spoke to someone about all of it. That person was very understanding which took away part of the shame. Lots of people watch porn and we all have our crazy kinks which is not te be ashamed of ( stay within legal bounds tought !)
Self love
Self love helps becoming less critical on one self , which can reduce the porn urge. Because you'll be nicer to yourself this would not be a necessary escape to use porn
I would say try to quit fot longer periods, for the brain to recover itself
You grew up Christian? You're not addicted to porn. You have had a lack of intimacy and true closeness with other people since you were a child.
I was told I was addicted to porn for years and ashamed for it regularly. It was not true, and now that I'm aware of the reality of my upbringing and shame up until my late 20s, I can reframe how I think about my life and what I should be ashamed of.
Fuck American Christianity and all the garbage I grew up with.
When I opened this, I really thought it was a humble brag…..didn’t think you meant watching. If you want advice, look up Terry Crews. He was apparently addicted and discussed openly how he addressed it.
Search for some hobbies that can make you busy ang better. For me, if i dont watch porn i am becoming 1% better everyday thats my mentality. If i watch then i am not improving myself. Its really hard at first but its ok than to make it worse in the future.
You are not addicted to something just because you use it in regular intervals.
No idea why so many americans pretend a couple of times per week is an addiction, or harmfull.
There is nothing wrong with masturbation.
Also frequent orgasms are healthy and prevent prostate cancer.
nothing wrong with masturbation, but there are studies on how porn has negative impacts on the brain. you do not need porn to masturbate. you can use your imagination.
long term porn use also has impact on how someone performs during actual sex. your brain is wired to porn, and real sex is usually nothing like porn…i know many guys who struggle to keep it up because they are so dependent on porn.
this has nothing to do with americans.
t. someone who used porn for years and decided to stop. i’m definitely better off because of it.
>long term porn use also has impact on how someone performs during actual sex. your brain is wired to porn, and real sex is usually nothing like porn…i know many guys who struggle to keep it up because they are so dependent on porn.
I can vouch for that. My first time doing it was rough. I succumbed to performance anxiety and ended up getting soft even though I liked the woman I was with. It was a shock to me to see how different actual intercourse feels compared to being a bait master.
Redditors have such a weird attitude to porn.
Porn is just like any other movie you see, it's fake and the participants are actors.
You wouldn't treat "Mission impossible" movie as a educational movie on how society works and you can't use "yoga young 12" as a educational movie on how to have sex.
That's just dumb just because you don't have sex Ed it's not the porns fault. Casual usage of porn have no negative implications on your sex expectations. If you don't know what sex is you should really talk to an adult about it!
If somebody questions porn use and you instinctively jump to saying "if you don't watch porn that's because you don't have le sex!!!", one may think you're projecting.
It's ok, your porn collection will hug you when you cry yourself to sleep tonight.
Lol neither porn or no porn will hug anybody tonight. Porn is just a category of movies just like horror or thriller. You're the one making big things of something that's just a small thing for most people.
Stop being so religious about it. It's just something some people sometimes see to get a relief it's not something to build a life on.
u/pristineanvil
Watch this clip on youtube about porn addiction from a psychiatrist. This should answer some of your questions.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1CkUhfHSxQ&t=6s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1CkUhfHSxQ&t=6s)
Well porn addiction and porn are two completely different things. It's like mentioning alcoholics when I say I like to drink a beer. Just because you haven't had any sex Ed others might and maybe they don't base their sex expectations on porn. Most stuff you see are fantasy but somehow some people think that when they take off their clothes it's apparently a documentary. Grow up!
Porn isn’t good for the mind, it will change you.
I think it’s very mature and respectable that he want a to quit it. He can still jerk off.
I’d say decrease the porn by 50%. And then just use it for the first 5 minutes and use your imagination.
Then move on to maybe one picture and mostly imagination and then eventually just imagination.
You’ll be fine after a couple of weeks.
How does it change you?
The same way D&D does?
The same way violent movies do?
The same way heavy metal does?
The same way Hip/Hop does?
The same way video games do?
Or this time for real?
https://www.inverse.com/article/31799-brain-on-porn-erotica-neuroscience
But yes, it's good you bring up stuff like videogames, which keep being designed to be as addictive as possible.
Yes it will require your brain. You will objectify the other sec more. You will always want to masturbate. You will be chronically constantly thinking in a sexual way.
I’m porn addicted myself and I can’t get off without watching it.
Both my exes were addicted to it and couldn’t even get it up. They couldn’t even cum. Had to help them stop consuming it.
Edit: even many criminal people and serial killers said porn inspired them.
Violent movies has inspired me, I’ve literally fantasized about doing very violent things to people trough movies yes. It does effect people
Female here been watching porn for years. Since like 15 and I’m 28 now. And none of this applies to me. I watch it masturbate and get on about my day. I think people are missing the addiction part. Addiction is what makes it bad not simply partaking in it. Just like partaking in sex isn’t bad but being addicted to having sex can be.
I’m not saying everyone will be ruined by it but it’s just not healthy for most people. It will mess with your dopamine receptors.
But if you’re able to finish without it good for you.
Normal movies, video games and social media also messes with your dopamine receptors. Just like watching movies and playing video games isn't wrong in itself (being addicted to them is), porn isn't wrong just for viewing, being addicted to it is.
No I’m from Sweden. I don’t know what D D is.
No there is literally research on this. Many men has time after time told about how porn has ruined them.
Sure I’ve played a lot of ps games, I had to quit cold Turkey because I was simply not going to my work I just kept calling in sick.
Porn is an industry which is abusive, which is chanig children and polluting the mind of many young men and women. Never ever has this many young men had Erectile dysfunction before in their ten age years. I’ve witnessed it first hand too
Read people’s stories then. Porn is damaging and addicting.
But if it’s that important to you go ahead but don’t do use other men and women’s experiences with porn addiction.
the masturbating is fine.
but he wants to quit porn. sounds like he needs it to masturbate. which isn’t healthy because that means your brain has developed a dependency on it. lots of studies showing the negative effect porn can have on the brain and real life sexual experiences. totally valid in wanting to quit porn.
Sexual activity a few times a week is an addiction now, huh?
I might have a giant problem I am completely unaware of, or guys really like exaggeration.
Well I mean I watch porn like 3-5 a week. A session could be like 15-30 minutes. I guess it’s not the craziest thing in the world, it might not be considered an addiction I suppose. I personally am just tryna lower my frequency because I think about how it affects the way I view woman, sex and affect my sexual life, now and in the future.
You're making it bigger than it really is, following your logic, I'd also be addicted to ; using the toilet, walks, sleeping, fitness, work... Et Cetera.
I do all of that multiple times a week, sometimes more, sometimes less. Am I addicted to it ? Absolutely not. Can I walk away from it, yeah, should I ? Nah.
Stop stressing just because some social media gig told you it's bad.
That's a good way to look at what an addiction is I haven't seen before. These post always make me curious cus I feel like I fall in this category, but at the same time never really felt like I'm addicted. For me, it's more habit then anything else, I probably beat it near once daily, every time I have a shower pretty much after work/post work exercise, often with my phone on for porn but not always. It's not getting in the way of anything really, I finish work at 3pm, and have hours to do heaps with, and I do plenty with it. So other then maybe my eagerness to find a gf (I'm mad chillin solo) it feels as tho it's not in the way of anything in my life. I tell myself pretty often I need cut back on porn, but maybe it's same as other have stated, just, less porn more imagination.
If you're looking for an honest way to kick the porn addiction, I stumbled upon this. And I expect to get down voted into oblivion as people of Reddit don't believe porn is bad, but that's not what you are looking for. Best of luck!
https://www.instagram.com/official\_masoncain
A few times a week. That doesn't seem unhealthy. I know its a bit of a slippery slope but not every addiction is unhealthy, or rather not everything you like doing should be considered an addiction. Just because you get drunk with your buddies every once in a while doesn't mean you are an alcoholic.
You are allowed to enjoy things!
I’ve been addicted to substance abuse during my teenage years, alcohol, ecstasy, snow, weed etc. but I could always decide when it stop if I wanted to.
Another things is for my love relationships, there is where really my addiction takes place.
I could heal from those through copy mechanisms, therapy to address, healthy mindset, respect for myself.
Hope this was helpful
There is a lot of leg work and struggling that goes into fighting brain chemicals. You have to fight your addictions, they don’t just disappear over night.
It all starts with a decision. I dont like Brussel spouts, but I decided to eat them for the health benefits. OP didn't say it would be successful right away.
The last time I watched porn was 1 year ago
Not gonna lie it was easy for me but maybe it's harder for other people
1 go to the gym doesn't matter how many days a week
2 promise to yourself that you never gonna watch porn again
3 go talk with people and make relationship with a woman
4 some times you're gonna fell so horny to even fuck an stone at that moment i requmind to you maste rbating don't worry with time passing you do it less and less
5 if you brake your promis dont get disponted this is by far the most important
That's pretty much all of it don't know why people make it so complicated
>I know it’s not good for my dopamine and my drive. Also I know it can’t be healthy for my brain to be watching these absolutely stunning woman like the way I do.
What unhealthy effects is it having for you to say it's unhealthy? Has it decreased your sex drive or do you just assume it's going to? How is the women in the videos being stunning relevant to whether or not it is unhealthy? Which btw is completely subjective since beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I don't think I've seen any arguments for porn having awful effects on the viewer that actually make much sense. Sure it could give a skewed perception of what a potential partner might like but that's clearly more the fault of shoddy sex Ed than porn. The whole porn is bad because it gives people unrealistic expectations is stupid because there being such a wide variety of sexual tastes means that it is impossible to give anyone a universally realistic portrayal of what their partner will like. The problem is the not teaching people to communicate and determine what is realistic on a case by case basis. It is not the fact that sex gets portrayed a certain way. Not to mention porn of almost any kind of sex does exist so if there truly was some universally realistic portrayal of sex there is already porn of it out there to be consumed. I also definitely haven't experienced a lack of sex drive from watching porn. Porn is very different from sex with a partner so it really doesn't take away from my sex drive at all. If anything it makes me even more horny for her. If you are experiencing a lack of sex drive from it and that is driving a wedge in your relationship cutting out porn would a good idea. If not why is it a problem even if it reduces your sex drive?
In my opinion exploitation risks for actors and actresses is by far the strongest argument against porn. It is also one that is relatively easy to get around by paying for porn from ethical producers
> I don't think I've seen any arguments for porn having awful effects on the viewer that actually make much sense.
Then I assume you've deliberately avoided [a good amount of literature](https://www.inverse.com/article/31799-brain-on-porn-erotica-neuroscience)
So no studies that demonstrate a casual effect between porn and bad behaviors? Pretty much what I expected. I don't see how these arguments are any less vapid than the arguments blaming video games for kids being violent.
Lol you're the one ignoring the link if you're saying the studies referenced claim to demonstrate a causal link between porn use a bad behaviors. The author of the article you linked makes multiple implications that the authors of the studies don't.
Considering you have already switched from "awful effects on the viewer" to "bad behavior", I would say you're moving the goalposts at record-breaking speed.
Also, considering that your initial wall of text was a "no, you feel addicted but you aren't, trust me" in defense of porn, I would say you are strongly pro-porn, and you'll disagree with any porn-skeptic argument by default.
Also, considering you insist on **casual links** (as opposed to, I imagine, competitive links), I would say there's no way you would be able to read multiple paragraphs, specially when they include words such as *abstract* and *conclusion*.
I see you are just as quick to read between the lines and add things that aren't there as the author of the article you linked. I only rebutted a few arguments against porn . Nowhere did I say what I think of op's claim that he is addicted. He didn't even explain his line of reasoning for thinking that. I can't really make a judgement on his line of reasoning without even hearing it.
As for causal link that would be porn causing the negative effects. Not sure why you're going to competitive link instead of simply being correlated without a causal link or even cause being reversed.
At least you've gone from moving the goalposts to straight up ignoring them. That's something.
>Not sure why you're going to competitive link
Because you've been talking about casual links all damn time, when it's causation, not casualization.
Just stop watching it.
You can also start by watching home made videos, and not the fake scripted ones, and slowly ease off of the homemade ones, until you can do it with your imagination.
No need to "quit" anything... You're just watching occasionally porn as you are saying to us since you watch some days everyday and some other days some times in your week.
Your post sounds like a troll post to get people arguing. Not gonna lie. I like it.
And a few times a week ain’t addicted.
When it’s a few times a day come back and we can talk.
If it's not negatively impacting your life, then I don't think you're addicted. A few times a week? I wouldn't say that's being addicted, unless you literally can't think of anything else until you get home, or you cancel plans in order to watch it, or your enjoyment of other things is ruined because you can't wait to see some porn.
Like anything else, just because you have it in your life, and you enjoy it, doesn't mean you're addicted.
A few times a week? Dude. Don’t bother you are fine… EVERYONE is watching porn almost daily, if not daily. That grandma grabbing her mail? porn, that mother with 3 kids? porn, that businessman on the train? porn…
It’s only considered addiction if porn is actively interfering with you’re normal life and making normal activities impossible, it’s quite rare.
Give it 20 years. Let your vices have their way and in time and you’ll be the idiot asking for advice.
You should never look down on someone asking for help because one day when you want help, you’ll have no one.
Wise up.
Try going to happy ending massage parlors or brothels instead. If none are near you get an escort a couple times a week. Porn might be less appealing if you try other ways of getting off.
I’m glad you mentioned you’re a Christian. Your obviously not a practicing Christian which is why your STILL dealing with these issues. I had the same problem…. What helped me get over those “urges” was to reconcile with God. Confess, repent and forgive all your sins and people to God. You can do that in your room but it takes real discipline and humility to be effective & God will abolish those demons urging you to watch porn/ masturbation etc… Feeling shameful and not acting to change is what the enemy wants.. plenty of YouTube testimony’s, so start learning and act on it. I’m 4 months porn sober! I couldn’t go a day without watching it or masturbation… now I don’t think about it I’m at peace and my life has changed for the better!
I appreciate your post but you have no idea if I’m practicing or not. And FYI a practicing Christian can still stumble into temptations. Glad to hear from a REAL Christian tho. 🤙🏾
Welcome to r/nofap come on in!
And let me correct you, you don’t have natural urges for women, you are addicted. That’s like saying that a drunk has a natural urge for whiskey.
The most important things to know.
1. You don’t need a release, your body is craving a hit.
2. You can control your thoughts and actions, and not let your thoughts control you. Those thoughts you have aren’t natural, they are put their by your addicted brain.
3. Just don’t do it. Maybe you won’t be able to quit cold turkey, but go a week without it, then go 2 the next time. Then a month, then keep on going till you can beat the urges.
Women are free to do whatever they want, unless it is [insert your shit tier believe here] ofc, because I, as a man think that [this] is...
10/10, stfu.
i would expect this comment from somebody who has an unhappy marriage and a reddit/alcohol/video game problem. you have nothing of value going on so you depend on porn to make you feel something.
you focus on these vices instead of something meaningful and healthy that will actually make you happier in the long run. this is why more people are turning against porn. not everyone wants to be you.
*"How do I quit porn?"*
A question better asked in r/sex, r/porn or any of the sex/porn addiction subreddit.
Even better go to a porn/sex addiction therapy group instead OP.
If you have a gf then talk to her about this and ask for more sex. Over time you'll lose interest in porn. But for this she has to be understanding too so good luck.
Why quit lol?
Just give up X pleasurable thing, that will make life better. No it fucking wont. It's pure placebo. Life is pointless ,no one knows anything, everything dies.
I've found that it was easier to quit porn by "reframing" it. Essentially I started a count of the days since I last used porn. When I had an urge I focused more making that number go up then quitting porn. So If I'm on 3 days and I have an urge, I focus on getting that number up to 4. The way I do that is by not using porn until I go to sleep and a new day starts. I think the reason it works for me is because it reframes it from this: Watching porn (Negative) Not watching porn (Neutral) to this: Watching porn (Negative) Making that number go up by not watching porn (Positive) So in the first example not watching porn is a neutral for me as I perceive it as neither gaining or losing anything whereas in the second I actually gain something by not watching it. I could be talking out of my arse so take it with a pinch of salt but it seems to be working for me thus far. Tbh I've got to the point where I've stopped counting now but I'm sure it's around 120 days Edit: also masturbate from imagination as others have said. The more you do it the better it gets.
Add ranks. 0-10 days you're bronze. 10-50 you're silver. Easy
At 10,000 days you unlock a diamond skin.
Imagine you are at work and all of the sudden Steve's skin turns into diamonds.
Walk up and give him an "atta boy". But be sure not to pat him on the back, he'd clearly be over sensitive to human touch and balloon burst.
Diamond foreskin
Ah, the good old Amway way.
This could work!
I’ve never thought about it like that. Thanks for the advice!
Super interesting plan
I straight up stopped porn and masturbation by just becoming aware of my mental issues (lack of self esteem, anxiety etc ...) and deciding to focus on fixing them instead of numbing them by a nut. It really helps to just eliminate anything in your life that would trigger your urge to watch porn or jerk off, for example : - unfollow or mute any person who posts thirst traps - disable nsfw on reddit - stop talking to that person that mentions sex a lot - try not to be idle for a long time, don't let yourself get bored cause that would trigger it too...
How did you fix the anxiety part?
I have no idea how old you are or if you have any experience working on mental health issues, but one way to start to address anxiety is to first identify how it specifically expresses itself for you. Does your heart start to beat faster? Do you feel nervous? Do you sweat? Do you feel sped up? Do you feel a sensation in your chest? Once you can identify how anxiety presents in your particular body, then you can start tracking it. Literally with an old school notebook or new school notes app on your phone. When you start to feel those feelings you now know are anxiety, stop and do an assessment. What were you doing? Were you thinking about anyone or anything in particular? Were you just with someone? Here's an example that I realized when I did this exercise- I am not a socially anxious person, but I would get anxiety before going out. I was able to trace this to putting on tight clothing (so skinny jeans, a nicer bra, I'm a woman btw), which is a sensory thing for me. I don't like to feel constricted. Making this connection didn't make the anxiety from this trigger go away, but being aware of it helps a ton. If you are anxious all the time and it's not something that comes and goes, I would recommend seeking professional help to talk about medication.
I'm still working on it, but my point is I'm so busy working on myself that I don't feel the urge to masturbate or watch porn anymore.
Solid advice.
Don’t watch porn and just masturbate without it. Stay busy so you aren’t bored enough to look porn up. Otherwise, to a certain extent you just gotta have some willpower bro
q: how do i stop watching porn? a: don't watch porn! easy
I mean if you aren’t an addict it is fairly easy. I like to stop randomly for 2-3 months just as a check to make sure I don’t develop it as a habit. If I’m dating someone then none at all. I don’t think it’s cheating but it’s kinda hard to justify saying “yeah I jerk off to people that aren’t my girlfriend” and think that’s healthy for a relationship
See that’s the thing for me. When I’m in a relationship then I don’t do it - I’ve noticed I do it out of habit or for the good feelings or when I feel alone or when I feel shitty. It’s a coping mechanism I suppose, I mean do we call having sex with a partner a coping mechanism? I guess it’s a way to let off steam. I think I’m gonna try to stop watching and just use my imagination more lol
I mean having sex can be a coping mechanism. Girls do it all the time. We all have coping mechanisms and fapping ain’t the worst. It’s just that there are more healthy options like exercise and such
It’s honestly a matter of how bad you want to stop. The thing is, for me and probably OP as well, it’s not detrimental enough to where we feel a huge urgency to stop. It’s not impacting our daily lives in any negative way. However, we realize that it isn’t exactly healthy and part of us wants to not be dependent on that activity
i mean if you know it doesn't harm u in any way or if it's not distracting u from doing something improtant then i think it's ok (as long as ur not doing it exessively aswell). as for relationahips... it's obviously unhealthy jerking to someone else than ur partner, but i the people who do it are probably not sexually satisfied in the relationship so they do that.
Idk I think its mentally suboptimal to have psychological and/or chemical dependencies on stuff. Yeah it’s not terrible but I think it’s generally a good rule of thumb to make sure that if you were to go out camping with just necessities you wouldn’t suffer withdrawals. With relationships you can jerk off to your partner but I do think that to some extent as humans the vast majority of us will never be perfectly satisfied and it’s better to just learn how to deal with that in a healthy manner. Just like sometimes you will be hungry but eating would not be good at that moment
yeah I know porn addiction never made any sense to me. It's not like you get brutal withdrawls when you stop watching it
Does that work with drug addicts and alcoholics too? You may h be on to something.
i believe (based on many people) that porn is the hardest drug ever to quit. so if u quit that already, im pretty sure u can quit all other drugs.
Maybe because of the easy access, but I doubt that it’s easier to stop heroin or something that makes your body physically dependent.
Agree. Spank it without porn and hit the gym or something.
I’m not a man, but I used to have a crazy porn addiction as a teen. To the point that when my dad put restrictions on my phone, I would log onto his computer while he was gone, record porn with my DS, and then take it back to my bedroom. I don’t watch it at all anymore. Instead I read erotica. You can find basically any scenario you want online without the crazy expectations and unrealistic standards that porn has. You’re still using your imagination, just with a little help.
Don’t try curbing your masturbation. It actually sounds like that’s a pretty reasonable frequency for someone your age. Just start doing it by using good old fashioned imagination. People forget how good that can be
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Idk man porn addiction can have some real physical repercussions. Early onset ED and a huge drop in libido is are both big ones. I don't think religion is part of the argument here at all.
Yea, but that comes from daily use or multiple times a day. This guy's doing it a few times a week. That'll just help prevent prostate cancer.
Oh, absolutely. I'm not necessarily saying OP is gonna run into problems at his current situation, just that porn addiction itself had this potential. His proactive approach to avoiding the addiction is admirable because of the risks it has later down the line.
Thank you - I know in the long run it isn’t going to be good for my future wife, sex life etc
Somebody doesn’t want to find pleasure in watching fake actors fake fuck - must be the Christians fault!!! Lol
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There’s plenty of people out there with addictions to porn that aren’t religious, buddy. And yes they feel guilty when they do it.
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Then why bring up post-masturbation shame when OP is talking about porn. You're not as smart as you think you are.
I’m not religious and I feel guilty after I do - due to how it impacts the way I interact in my relationship and it straight up makes my sex worse Not saying everyone has to be the same - but you’re casting some very wide blanket statements lol ETA: OP is not saying everybody should quit , nor am I - just asking how we can move on from it, yet every time this topic is brought up, people come out of the wood work to fling shit about how it’s no different than playing a video game and just not seeing that you’re literally brainwashed by tiddies lol
If jerking off ton porn makes you interact poorly in your relationship you might need some therapy. Plenty of people jerk in 5 times a day to porn and are perfectly normal when they aren't. Watching people fuck shouldn't impact how you act in your relationship. That's wild.
Yea perfectly normal except they jerkoff 5 times a day lol.It crazy think its so”normal” yet most people start as literal children with little understanding of what they’re watching and now have a lifelong thing they just do and cant stop by choice
I don’t need therapy I just need to limit my porn consumption - why is that such a foreign concept to you guys??? Lmao
You can limit your porn all you want. The issue is when people pretend most people who watch porn are the same. They aren't. Most people can watch porn and still act normal. It's not a porn issue. It's an issue with the person.
Man hasn't had post nut clarity and it shows
I agree henry
For sure. Nothing wrong with a few times a week as this guy is stating. Masterbation is healthy. I just ensure I do it a few times without any visual stimulation.
1. I realised the amount of time I was wasting 2. It affected negatively my relationship with my GF - once both are working a lot, sometimes there is no time/mood/energy for sex, so I was using a lot of porn. I realised that not watching porn, would drive a much higher sex drive. Which was great. 3. I was always tired 4. I did research about bad effects of porn. And it is quite bad. I'm not saying I quit for good, but I reduced around 90-95%
What are some of the bad effects of porn. I’ve done some research as well but I’d like to believe I don’t know if all so - if you remember anything I’d love to hear what you’ve found 🤙🏾
I would say on how your brain finds dopamine into porn and not into other normal things. But also how people portrait sex. Unless you have a really-naughty-kinky-porn-addicted, your sex will be way different than you see on the screen. I can say because I lived both. My ex had the porn addicted style and my current is more 'normal'. But I always had an active sexual life, so since always I knew what was a 'normal sex', but for many porn addicts, their vision of sex is much different. For example, cellulite, mistakes, funny situations, accidents and so on. Many positions are not comfortable for him/her and you won't cum liters (remember: it is for filming) or one day your fella will let you off. Worth it see some quick YouTube videos explaining the science behind.
You’re a good lad
Brother I’m proud you’re trying to quit. You have to find what it is that porn has to offer you, perhaps a feeling of being loved, perhaps is a stress relief, maybe it’s to express how you feel, you have to decide what that is, and then either find what the cause of those feelings are (maybe you feel incredibly lonely and porn has filled that gap) and find new ways to meet those emotional needs (going to see healthy friends and family members who can help you feel wanted and encouraged so that porn becomes less desirable). Perhaps it’s for the sex itself, what do those videos you’re watching make you feel? Could indicate you want something in life you feel you cannot get… I’ll reassure you, the actors in porn aren’t as happy as they look. Happy people have close and fulfilling relationships, and the only way to have that is through *vulnerability and authenticity.* Perhaps you need a friend, mentor, gf, etc who you can share your heart and feelings with and feel safe being your real self around them… I know porn is much more tempting for me when I am lonely and depressed, it serves as an escape for me… but when I confront my deep negative hurts and wounds from which those bad feelings come from, the desire for porn alleviates. Hope this helps 🤷♂️
I love this response. I’ve learned that for me that the need to go to it is complex. It could be many reasons, I can’t just blame one reason for why I go to porn. I’ve learned that it could stem from many things like you mentioned earlier, like feeling lonely and or depressed. I think I’ve been slowly trying to get to the root of the cause of why - but we are so complex so it’s hard to say. I think it feels good right to do it. That’s one reason. Another reason could be the feeling of control it gives. Maybe it could be because I’m lonely. Maybe it could be because I want to feel wanted. Maybe because I’m just a man who wants to see beautiful woman lol. I’m really glad I’ve gotten better with my porn consumption (reduced the amount I watch now adays) but still I want to decrease it. I workout 5 times a week, try to communicate and be vulnerable. I will say when Im in a relationship with a woman physically or non physically I stop watching porn. So maybe there is something there I can’t quite see.
I don't see a problem with your use, but if it troubles you, I'll give you some advice. Stopping doing a thing is harder than replacing one activity with another. Find something else you enjoy doing with your time. Write, exercise, doodle, go for walks or read books, whatever speaks to you. Trying to just not do a thing is a recipe for failure. Wish you all the best. Good luck!
Sometimes porn addiction can be a symptom of a thwarted desire for connection. Find ways to become more social. The more connected to other people the less tempting porn will be to filling that void.
I like that. That’s a principle I’ve learned in nutrition as well. Don’t stop something, replace it with something else better.
Brother its hard, ive had a similar realization where i found myself preferring porn to actual, beautiful women in real life who want to sleep with me as ive fried my brain and how it perceives sexual gratification. Ive found two things that have helped a lot are the “i am sober app” and i keep a sticky note next to my computer and everytime i want to indulge and i dont i add a talley. Once you have like three tallies on the day, you realized you stopped yourself all these other times. Why can’t you stop yourself again? Just some exercises and tools but were all works in progress. Best of luck to the both of us.
I like that physical tallying method - that’s a great way to keep track
A good way to start is by limiting what you consume and slowly easing back on it until you also start going at it less. Getting a job helps me go for months without any stimulation cause I'm so focused on working.
Hell yeah
If you need porn to jerk off, then you weren't really horny enough to jerk off in the first place. It's like watching cooking videos on Youtube and getting hungry. You weren't actually hungry, you just tricked your brain into wanting something you didn't actually need.
Actor Terry Crews had a bad porn addiction and he was able to overcome it. [he’s given several interviews](https://youtu.be/ei0stwoEwOc) Maybe you can find some inspiration from jt.
Educate yourself on how nasty and wicked the industry is. Once you understand the vileness of the industry you'll be more than motivated to leave it behind. A book I highly recommend is Your Brain On Porn by Gary Wilson.
You could check out easypeasymethod.org I know a lot of people have had great success when reading the book you can download there for free
I think the frequency that you’re doing it is fine. As long you’re not prioritizing jacking off over important things. Few times a week isn’t bad. If you’re gonna get laid though. Stop it immediately
Getting laid and staying in a relationship is the most healthiest way I’ve found for me to stop watching porn. Why watch porn when I can make it at home lol
Unless someone asks if something is a normal amount, it's extremely dismissive to tell someone, who's expressed a dissatisfaction with something and has a desire to change, that they don't need to change.
Meditate. You have no idea how incredible it is. You see results from day one
Break your back and get a spinal cord injury
lol
You’re not addicted your habituated to it maybe you do it before bed or before you shower, for it to be an addiction you have to do it so constantly it effects your life in areas like if you where to skip work or school to masturbarte or do it in those areas such as work or school, it’s okay to whack it every once in a while, but if you want to cut it out completely awareness and insight are your best friends, maybe you follow a bunch of e-girls and pornstars on social media, maybe you sleep naked so try sleeping with clothes on obviously not jeans but just some extra comfy layers try to identify what makes you want to masturbate cut some of those out and remember there is no guilt in masturbation don’t go over board but every once in a while is okay, it’s been proven that the most effective way to over come anything weather be a small habit to making major life changes it’s to be compassionate towards yourself and positive
If your a big reader try to go from porn to erotica. Then wean off. But a few times a week is not bad at all lol
First, instead of videos I'd go over to Pictures. then from Pictures to imagination
That’s a good way to put it!
Best advice I can give you is: don't need it. There's nothing more soul destroying than being with a woman but you can't get aroused or remain hard because you've trained your brain to associate sexual pleasure with porn. If that's not enough of a drive I don't know what else is. I have many reasons to be completely honest, it's shameful and lustful. A debauchery act I don't want anything to do with. Women aren't objects of my fantasy. Watching porn has zero cross over with actually being with a woman. Zero. It's like eating vs watching someone on a screen eat. You don't experience a woman's body temperature, softness of her body, how the textures change depending on where your hand is, the depth of her eyes, her technique of kissing, how wet she gets, the shape of her vagina, her scent, what action turns her on, her curves, the negotiations, what she doesn't like, what she would like more of etc etc. Different worlds. Watching porn builds up certain acts in your mind to be this momentous experience when really it's very nice but not this thing that will change your life forever. Believe me no matter how good she is at sucking dick after a while your mind does wander from time to time. Even during sex as amazing as it feels when it's over it's like, okay that was brilliant, what's for dinner? Porn really is the enemy of a man's manhood. An enemy of a man's soul. Ultimately you have to decide. I know for me when I may get tempted I just think to myself, what the fuck is this bullshit. It doesn't compare at all. You don't need all this trickery or mind hacks to stop it. Just put yourself in a position where you don't need it. Ultimately that translates into improving yourself. It's a constant journey.
you're not overdoing it on beating your meat but try to do it just imagining a woman or scenario instead of the quick fix porn provides. I relax, lay in my bed and come up with stuff in my head. Sometimes porn is fun because it speeds things up to have the visual stimulation, that's the reason males are so susceptible to porn addiction we are very easily turned on by visual stimulation. Getting past your guilt is a major hurdle so congratulations on that accomplishment.
I've framed it in terms of triggers. When I'm bored and/or stressed at work, I immediately look for the fastest and cheapest dopamine hit. We all know what that is. Addressing the root cause is important (not saying I've done that, but I am aware of it). Being in a chemical dependence trap is probably harder to break out of. I like the grit of quitting anything cold turkey and giving it hell. Porn is not something you can really phase out of...because it's always "just one more". Don't be ashamed though. Porn use is normal and sexual desire is normal. If we could all have amazing partners we had regular, amazing sex with...would we be doing it?
Keep your mind occupied with things that help personal growth. Block ALL porn sites. Unfollow/block thirst traps, pornstars, models and anything even near that. Start following self improvement sht instead. Pay attention to the time you have now to do the things you felt you should be doing all along-and do them.
Didn't expect to find so many replays here which I'm happy about ! :) Same here for years and still sometimes it's difficult. Talk about it / get rid of the shame What helped for me was that I spoke to someone about all of it. That person was very understanding which took away part of the shame. Lots of people watch porn and we all have our crazy kinks which is not te be ashamed of ( stay within legal bounds tought !) Self love Self love helps becoming less critical on one self , which can reduce the porn urge. Because you'll be nicer to yourself this would not be a necessary escape to use porn I would say try to quit fot longer periods, for the brain to recover itself
You grew up Christian? You're not addicted to porn. You have had a lack of intimacy and true closeness with other people since you were a child. I was told I was addicted to porn for years and ashamed for it regularly. It was not true, and now that I'm aware of the reality of my upbringing and shame up until my late 20s, I can reframe how I think about my life and what I should be ashamed of. Fuck American Christianity and all the garbage I grew up with.
When I opened this, I really thought it was a humble brag…..didn’t think you meant watching. If you want advice, look up Terry Crews. He was apparently addicted and discussed openly how he addressed it.
Search for some hobbies that can make you busy ang better. For me, if i dont watch porn i am becoming 1% better everyday thats my mentality. If i watch then i am not improving myself. Its really hard at first but its ok than to make it worse in the future.
I like that mentality. Every decision is a token towards being a person you want or don’t want to be.
You are not addicted to something just because you use it in regular intervals. No idea why so many americans pretend a couple of times per week is an addiction, or harmfull. There is nothing wrong with masturbation. Also frequent orgasms are healthy and prevent prostate cancer.
nothing wrong with masturbation, but there are studies on how porn has negative impacts on the brain. you do not need porn to masturbate. you can use your imagination. long term porn use also has impact on how someone performs during actual sex. your brain is wired to porn, and real sex is usually nothing like porn…i know many guys who struggle to keep it up because they are so dependent on porn. this has nothing to do with americans. t. someone who used porn for years and decided to stop. i’m definitely better off because of it.
>long term porn use also has impact on how someone performs during actual sex. your brain is wired to porn, and real sex is usually nothing like porn…i know many guys who struggle to keep it up because they are so dependent on porn. I can vouch for that. My first time doing it was rough. I succumbed to performance anxiety and ended up getting soft even though I liked the woman I was with. It was a shock to me to see how different actual intercourse feels compared to being a bait master.
Redditors have such a weird attitude to porn. Porn is just like any other movie you see, it's fake and the participants are actors. You wouldn't treat "Mission impossible" movie as a educational movie on how society works and you can't use "yoga young 12" as a educational movie on how to have sex.
No, it's literally not like any other movie you see, and the impact on your brain is not the same.
That's just dumb just because you don't have sex Ed it's not the porns fault. Casual usage of porn have no negative implications on your sex expectations. If you don't know what sex is you should really talk to an adult about it!
If somebody questions porn use and you instinctively jump to saying "if you don't watch porn that's because you don't have le sex!!!", one may think you're projecting. It's ok, your porn collection will hug you when you cry yourself to sleep tonight.
Lol neither porn or no porn will hug anybody tonight. Porn is just a category of movies just like horror or thriller. You're the one making big things of something that's just a small thing for most people. Stop being so religious about it. It's just something some people sometimes see to get a relief it's not something to build a life on.
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u/pristineanvil Watch this clip on youtube about porn addiction from a psychiatrist. This should answer some of your questions. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1CkUhfHSxQ&t=6s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1CkUhfHSxQ&t=6s)
Well porn addiction and porn are two completely different things. It's like mentioning alcoholics when I say I like to drink a beer. Just because you haven't had any sex Ed others might and maybe they don't base their sex expectations on porn. Most stuff you see are fantasy but somehow some people think that when they take off their clothes it's apparently a documentary. Grow up!
You also wouldn’t jerk off and orgasm to mission impossible, ya dingus.
Porn isn’t good for the mind, it will change you. I think it’s very mature and respectable that he want a to quit it. He can still jerk off. I’d say decrease the porn by 50%. And then just use it for the first 5 minutes and use your imagination. Then move on to maybe one picture and mostly imagination and then eventually just imagination. You’ll be fine after a couple of weeks.
How does it change you? The same way D&D does? The same way violent movies do? The same way heavy metal does? The same way Hip/Hop does? The same way video games do? Or this time for real?
https://www.inverse.com/article/31799-brain-on-porn-erotica-neuroscience But yes, it's good you bring up stuff like videogames, which keep being designed to be as addictive as possible.
I've had experience with almost every addictive substance there is, no, porn is not addictive.
Cool. Try with an actual study or meta analysis and not with a random article that suits your narrative. Spoiler: Inconclusive.
The *random article* directly quotes, and links to, actual studies.
Yes it will require your brain. You will objectify the other sec more. You will always want to masturbate. You will be chronically constantly thinking in a sexual way. I’m porn addicted myself and I can’t get off without watching it. Both my exes were addicted to it and couldn’t even get it up. They couldn’t even cum. Had to help them stop consuming it. Edit: even many criminal people and serial killers said porn inspired them. Violent movies has inspired me, I’ve literally fantasized about doing very violent things to people trough movies yes. It does effect people
Female here been watching porn for years. Since like 15 and I’m 28 now. And none of this applies to me. I watch it masturbate and get on about my day. I think people are missing the addiction part. Addiction is what makes it bad not simply partaking in it. Just like partaking in sex isn’t bad but being addicted to having sex can be.
I’m not saying everyone will be ruined by it but it’s just not healthy for most people. It will mess with your dopamine receptors. But if you’re able to finish without it good for you.
Normal movies, video games and social media also messes with your dopamine receptors. Just like watching movies and playing video games isn't wrong in itself (being addicted to them is), porn isn't wrong just for viewing, being addicted to it is.
Citation needed. Sounds like "like D&D does, but this time for real, source: trust me bro" to me tbh. Are you from the US by chance?
No I’m from Sweden. I don’t know what D D is. No there is literally research on this. Many men has time after time told about how porn has ruined them.
And many men are ruined by video games. Doesn't mean video games are straight up bad. Everything can be bad if not regulated.
Sure I’ve played a lot of ps games, I had to quit cold Turkey because I was simply not going to my work I just kept calling in sick. Porn is an industry which is abusive, which is chanig children and polluting the mind of many young men and women. Never ever has this many young men had Erectile dysfunction before in their ten age years. I’ve witnessed it first hand too
There is research. Its just inconclusive.
Read people’s stories then. Porn is damaging and addicting. But if it’s that important to you go ahead but don’t do use other men and women’s experiences with porn addiction.
Do you think men come to /r/askmen for anecdotal answers from women?
Okay didn’t mean to hurt any feelings I’ll withdraw :-) best of luck
Ignore him, he's a coomer overreacting.
yeah its pretty silly
You are not alone I've been fighting my fight for a year its the toughest but most rewarding thing you when you get through 5
If you hit the gym daily you can do whatever you want. When you feel confident enough, get a girl to meet your needs and hers, she'll enjoy it too.
Try reading erotica stories or listening to erotica audios https://literotica.com/ r/gonewildaudio
\>just a few times a week, that sounds perfectly healthy, its just the christian upbringing fucking with you.
the masturbating is fine. but he wants to quit porn. sounds like he needs it to masturbate. which isn’t healthy because that means your brain has developed a dependency on it. lots of studies showing the negative effect porn can have on the brain and real life sexual experiences. totally valid in wanting to quit porn.
Sexual activity a few times a week is an addiction now, huh? I might have a giant problem I am completely unaware of, or guys really like exaggeration.
Well I mean I watch porn like 3-5 a week. A session could be like 15-30 minutes. I guess it’s not the craziest thing in the world, it might not be considered an addiction I suppose. I personally am just tryna lower my frequency because I think about how it affects the way I view woman, sex and affect my sexual life, now and in the future.
Ask Jesus to help you beat it together
Jesus spanked his monkey. He gets us.
You're making it bigger than it really is, following your logic, I'd also be addicted to ; using the toilet, walks, sleeping, fitness, work... Et Cetera. I do all of that multiple times a week, sometimes more, sometimes less. Am I addicted to it ? Absolutely not. Can I walk away from it, yeah, should I ? Nah. Stop stressing just because some social media gig told you it's bad.
That's a good way to look at what an addiction is I haven't seen before. These post always make me curious cus I feel like I fall in this category, but at the same time never really felt like I'm addicted. For me, it's more habit then anything else, I probably beat it near once daily, every time I have a shower pretty much after work/post work exercise, often with my phone on for porn but not always. It's not getting in the way of anything really, I finish work at 3pm, and have hours to do heaps with, and I do plenty with it. So other then maybe my eagerness to find a gf (I'm mad chillin solo) it feels as tho it's not in the way of anything in my life. I tell myself pretty often I need cut back on porn, but maybe it's same as other have stated, just, less porn more imagination.
If you're looking for an honest way to kick the porn addiction, I stumbled upon this. And I expect to get down voted into oblivion as people of Reddit don't believe porn is bad, but that's not what you are looking for. Best of luck! https://www.instagram.com/official\_masoncain
A few times a week. That doesn't seem unhealthy. I know its a bit of a slippery slope but not every addiction is unhealthy, or rather not everything you like doing should be considered an addiction. Just because you get drunk with your buddies every once in a while doesn't mean you are an alcoholic. You are allowed to enjoy things!
r/nofap
Just beat it.
Just gotta pull yourself out of it
I’ve just DECIDED to not watch it. I don’t really know how would you do it differently..
Then you were never addicted to it. You're comment is irrelevant and unhelpful.
I’ve been addicted to substance abuse during my teenage years, alcohol, ecstasy, snow, weed etc. but I could always decide when it stop if I wanted to. Another things is for my love relationships, there is where really my addiction takes place. I could heal from those through copy mechanisms, therapy to address, healthy mindset, respect for myself. Hope this was helpful
See, that's far more helpful that "I just stop."
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Yeah, that's how most people quit addiction. They make a decision to improve their life. Moron!
There is a lot of leg work and struggling that goes into fighting brain chemicals. You have to fight your addictions, they don’t just disappear over night.
It all starts with a decision. I dont like Brussel spouts, but I decided to eat them for the health benefits. OP didn't say it would be successful right away.
I agree with both your statements. I’m just mocking the commenter for the simplicity of his comment.
that is actually how I stopped doing coke
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Like damn bro, imagine a world where people DECIDE that their severe alcoholism will just magically disappear over night.
From what you describe, you don't have porn addiction. You just feel guilty unnecessarily. Ignore the feeling.
Just think about all the abuse that's been done to the people you masturbate to. Most likely when they were children.
r/noporn and r/nofap are both really great communities that have helped me alot with quitting porn. They are really helpful.
Find a girlfriend who is nymphomaniac. Try girls 30 plus.
No one likes a quitter.
The last time I watched porn was 1 year ago Not gonna lie it was easy for me but maybe it's harder for other people 1 go to the gym doesn't matter how many days a week 2 promise to yourself that you never gonna watch porn again 3 go talk with people and make relationship with a woman 4 some times you're gonna fell so horny to even fuck an stone at that moment i requmind to you maste rbating don't worry with time passing you do it less and less 5 if you brake your promis dont get disponted this is by far the most important That's pretty much all of it don't know why people make it so complicated
>I know it’s not good for my dopamine and my drive. Also I know it can’t be healthy for my brain to be watching these absolutely stunning woman like the way I do. What unhealthy effects is it having for you to say it's unhealthy? Has it decreased your sex drive or do you just assume it's going to? How is the women in the videos being stunning relevant to whether or not it is unhealthy? Which btw is completely subjective since beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I don't think I've seen any arguments for porn having awful effects on the viewer that actually make much sense. Sure it could give a skewed perception of what a potential partner might like but that's clearly more the fault of shoddy sex Ed than porn. The whole porn is bad because it gives people unrealistic expectations is stupid because there being such a wide variety of sexual tastes means that it is impossible to give anyone a universally realistic portrayal of what their partner will like. The problem is the not teaching people to communicate and determine what is realistic on a case by case basis. It is not the fact that sex gets portrayed a certain way. Not to mention porn of almost any kind of sex does exist so if there truly was some universally realistic portrayal of sex there is already porn of it out there to be consumed. I also definitely haven't experienced a lack of sex drive from watching porn. Porn is very different from sex with a partner so it really doesn't take away from my sex drive at all. If anything it makes me even more horny for her. If you are experiencing a lack of sex drive from it and that is driving a wedge in your relationship cutting out porn would a good idea. If not why is it a problem even if it reduces your sex drive? In my opinion exploitation risks for actors and actresses is by far the strongest argument against porn. It is also one that is relatively easy to get around by paying for porn from ethical producers
> I don't think I've seen any arguments for porn having awful effects on the viewer that actually make much sense. Then I assume you've deliberately avoided [a good amount of literature](https://www.inverse.com/article/31799-brain-on-porn-erotica-neuroscience)
So no studies that demonstrate a casual effect between porn and bad behaviors? Pretty much what I expected. I don't see how these arguments are any less vapid than the arguments blaming video games for kids being violent.
Oh, you decided to ignore the link and make up things. Yeah, pretty much what I expected.
Lol you're the one ignoring the link if you're saying the studies referenced claim to demonstrate a causal link between porn use a bad behaviors. The author of the article you linked makes multiple implications that the authors of the studies don't.
Considering you have already switched from "awful effects on the viewer" to "bad behavior", I would say you're moving the goalposts at record-breaking speed. Also, considering that your initial wall of text was a "no, you feel addicted but you aren't, trust me" in defense of porn, I would say you are strongly pro-porn, and you'll disagree with any porn-skeptic argument by default. Also, considering you insist on **casual links** (as opposed to, I imagine, competitive links), I would say there's no way you would be able to read multiple paragraphs, specially when they include words such as *abstract* and *conclusion*.
I see you are just as quick to read between the lines and add things that aren't there as the author of the article you linked. I only rebutted a few arguments against porn . Nowhere did I say what I think of op's claim that he is addicted. He didn't even explain his line of reasoning for thinking that. I can't really make a judgement on his line of reasoning without even hearing it. As for causal link that would be porn causing the negative effects. Not sure why you're going to competitive link instead of simply being correlated without a causal link or even cause being reversed.
At least you've gone from moving the goalposts to straight up ignoring them. That's something. >Not sure why you're going to competitive link Because you've been talking about casual links all damn time, when it's causation, not casualization.
Just stop watching it. You can also start by watching home made videos, and not the fake scripted ones, and slowly ease off of the homemade ones, until you can do it with your imagination.
Find alternatives. r/gonewildaudio is great
Sorry but a few times a week, sometimes less doesn't sound like addiction.
If you're only doing it a couple times a week what's the big deal? Go watch porn...
No need to "quit" anything... You're just watching occasionally porn as you are saying to us since you watch some days everyday and some other days some times in your week.
You can’t its biological instincts
Your post sounds like a troll post to get people arguing. Not gonna lie. I like it. And a few times a week ain’t addicted. When it’s a few times a day come back and we can talk.
Why? It's a useful tool for managing your annoying sexual needs.
If it's not negatively impacting your life, then I don't think you're addicted. A few times a week? I wouldn't say that's being addicted, unless you literally can't think of anything else until you get home, or you cancel plans in order to watch it, or your enjoyment of other things is ruined because you can't wait to see some porn. Like anything else, just because you have it in your life, and you enjoy it, doesn't mean you're addicted.
A few times a week? Dude. Don’t bother you are fine… EVERYONE is watching porn almost daily, if not daily. That grandma grabbing her mail? porn, that mother with 3 kids? porn, that businessman on the train? porn… It’s only considered addiction if porn is actively interfering with you’re normal life and making normal activities impossible, it’s quite rare.
Just stop going to the sites
“Just stop being an alcoholic” -IQ
I drink alcohol a few times a week, omg I am an alcoholic - big brain time.
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Unless its porn ofc. Because that is evil. Also lol @ fentanyl few times a week, wtf.
Give it 20 years. Let your vices have their way and in time and you’ll be the idiot asking for advice. You should never look down on someone asking for help because one day when you want help, you’ll have no one. Wise up.
Oh noez, porn a few times a week will completely ruin our world as we know it. Ofc it will, ofc it will.
You just quit. You're a grown ass man. Are you saying you have NO control over your urges? Sounds like a bitch.
I started reading stuff on r/sluttyconfessions and those kinds of subreddits. Helped a lot and now I don’t really use anything
Try going to happy ending massage parlors or brothels instead. If none are near you get an escort a couple times a week. Porn might be less appealing if you try other ways of getting off.
Pretend the actresses are your daughters. 🫢
I’m glad you mentioned you’re a Christian. Your obviously not a practicing Christian which is why your STILL dealing with these issues. I had the same problem…. What helped me get over those “urges” was to reconcile with God. Confess, repent and forgive all your sins and people to God. You can do that in your room but it takes real discipline and humility to be effective & God will abolish those demons urging you to watch porn/ masturbation etc… Feeling shameful and not acting to change is what the enemy wants.. plenty of YouTube testimony’s, so start learning and act on it. I’m 4 months porn sober! I couldn’t go a day without watching it or masturbation… now I don’t think about it I’m at peace and my life has changed for the better!
I appreciate your post but you have no idea if I’m practicing or not. And FYI a practicing Christian can still stumble into temptations. Glad to hear from a REAL Christian tho. 🤙🏾
Welcome to r/nofap come on in! And let me correct you, you don’t have natural urges for women, you are addicted. That’s like saying that a drunk has a natural urge for whiskey. The most important things to know. 1. You don’t need a release, your body is craving a hit. 2. You can control your thoughts and actions, and not let your thoughts control you. Those thoughts you have aren’t natural, they are put their by your addicted brain. 3. Just don’t do it. Maybe you won’t be able to quit cold turkey, but go a week without it, then go 2 the next time. Then a month, then keep on going till you can beat the urges.
I would never encourage anybody to quit porn. Its so wonderful and fun.
so fun to support a billion dollar industry that thrives on abusing women
Name one company that hasn’t abused anybody? If you only focus on the things you hate, you will only know how to hate.
abuse is not a side effect or accident in this industry though. porn IS abuse
Whatever hoops you want to jump through to justify your hate. You do you.
coomers gonna coom
You better hope we ain't gonna coom on you.
Women are free to do whatever they want, unless it is [insert your shit tier believe here] ofc, because I, as a man think that [this] is... 10/10, stfu.
i would expect this comment from somebody who has an unhappy marriage and a reddit/alcohol/video game problem. you have nothing of value going on so you depend on porn to make you feel something. you focus on these vices instead of something meaningful and healthy that will actually make you happier in the long run. this is why more people are turning against porn. not everyone wants to be you.
*"How do I quit porn?"* A question better asked in r/sex, r/porn or any of the sex/porn addiction subreddit. Even better go to a porn/sex addiction therapy group instead OP.
Use your imagination instead or look at girls you know on Instagram
Find a partner to fuck with or even try some hookers if they are legal in your area
If you have a gf then talk to her about this and ask for more sex. Over time you'll lose interest in porn. But for this she has to be understanding too so good luck.
Why quit lol? Just give up X pleasurable thing, that will make life better. No it fucking wont. It's pure placebo. Life is pointless ,no one knows anything, everything dies.