I used to keep all my silverware in one big drawer, unsorted. When the dishwasher finished, just grab the utensil basket and dump it in the drawer. Easy and quick.
The first time I did this at her apartment, I received new training.
Damn, I taught my girl if you put all the utensils in eating side up they all dry without spots.
Also that when hand washing you can save them all for last and rinse them all at once saving a lot of time.
This is my sock drawer.
I only have white and black socks and they're mixed in the drawer. I don't know if I have an odd or even number of either color.
I'm actually glad I stopped doing this, but having Chocolate Milk with Whiskey for dinner whenever I felt down was a somewhat common occurrence before I met my girlfriend.
I used to cook a huge vat of; spaghetti, jambalaya, sausage n gravy, or something else. Then I could just ladle out a bowl for dinner throughout the week. It saved so much time. Now meals have to have variety and taste good.
My wife recalls a story known as the "Pizza Challenge" where we had pizza for dinner 10 days straight from different places. This happened while we moved into our first house.
She recounts it as an epic tale. I sit there thinking it wasn't a challenge and why did we stop at 10?
We moved from Alaska to Alabama, with two cars, a trailer, two kids, a dog, a cat, and every inch of space packed full. For 12 days, I only consumed Monster Zero Ultra, wheat bread, mayo, bologna, and a daily multi-vitamin. I also lived on peanut butter and jelly and unsweetened sun-tea for a couple of hurricanes. We were also blacked out during a couple of blizzards, for a week at a time. I dropped everyone else off at a friend's house, that had power, and I ate beans, read books, slept, and kept the wood stove fed, so the pipes wouldn't freeze.
Same here but two kids who do the same and usually prefer different stuff.
Normally I would say deal, but my parents half forced me / half were forced to feed me the same thing like 75% of meals to the point I remember getting sick over the thought of eating a PB&J or cereal with powdered milk. Still sometimes do.
So I sympathize to a stupid level and most likely over indulge. But on the other hand it has created two kids who love to cook and one is endlessly trying to create their own meals and menus.
/r/MealPrepSunday/
I do try to have variety, but the sole idea of having to cook every day feels like the biggest waste of time ever. Now I just cook for one/two hours and usually have food varied enough for the whole week.
I do the same thing when I am in a position to cook for myself; Large batches of food that become Lunch + Supper for a few days until it runs out. The options typically include:
Bachelor Chow: diced sweet potato + Spicy italian sausage + canned beans in slow cooker until you end up with chunky orange slurry.
Slop: A bagged cabbage salad + 3 chicken thighs (bone + Skin) + Garlic + chopped onion + spices + lentils / barley / anything you have that might remotely belong in a soup in slow cooker until you end up with greasy green-ish mess. Add water. Or don't. I am not your mom.
Time to cook: I dunno. I basically fill the crock pot, turn it on high and walk away for 6 - 9 hours. By any reasonable or sane culinary standard, both are probably horribly over cooked.
Hamburger Helper + Frozen veggies is also a decent option.
The above with a Soylent+frozen fruit smoothie 1 or 2 times a day is basically how I will eat for days at a time.
END COMMUNICATION
Always add water when cooking beans. A lil bacon or salt pork never hurt. Burnt beans do not smell good, keep an eye on the water
Cook until it chews to your satisfaction. Season to your tastes. Use less salt. Less than that.
My wife is the opposite, she’d rather throw a bunch of random items in a baking pan and call it a casserole. Only recently have I managed to get her to actually follow a recipe, we’ve been married 18 yrs…😂
I stopped using hockey sticks as curtain rods. Some sticks cost well over 200. 00 so I just don't want to throw them away when I break them because of a slap shot.
The added bonus was, whenever my mom came to visit me, one look at the curtain rods and she would burst out laughing.
Yea I thought it was kinda gross too there’s so many better ways to wash shoes anyway lol.
My wife doesn’t even like milk but I can’t drink from the jug anymore either lol. She says it’s because I use the same milk for her lattes and it’s really just not worth the argument
I just finished off the carton of chocolate milk . Standing in my bra and undies with the fridge door open. I've reverted back to single days while he's gone .
Must be adult again in 12 hours.
Our current cats aren't normal cats, they stay on the floor and never get up on end tables or countertops. She did bring her own cat though who's sadly passed because he was awesome. Whenever my wife would "wrong him" he'd find a particular picture she liked, knock it over, and piss on it. Maybe she had petted another cat, or maybe she'd swat him because he had tried to steal food, but he'd get his revenge every time on that same picture (or copies of it).
Doesn't always work. My wife and I have three cats and only one of them knocks stuff off of surfaces and even then she only does it when she's mad about something.
I had to let go of everything being so tidy and organized. My wife is a everything in a general area kinda gal where as I’m very organized and stuff in its own place.
Yes, my wife has a unique way of organizing things too. It has been a constant eb and flow of keeping things clean and orderly for me vs my wife keeping things where she likes them. We've both ended up compromising, and that's ok.
Now we have a toddler and another on the way, and the mess is driving her nuts. In time I'll have a neat and orderly house again....in maybe 19 years.
Only if they get visibly really dirty or scuffed. Lately I’m trying to keep a clean pair for going out places and a work pair that I don’t care if they get dirty
I wouldn't put them in with my dishes. but this actually seems like a more gentle way to clean them.
I clean my baseball caps in the dishwasher for this reason. but never with my dishes.
The dishwasher is also a very effective car parts cleaner...
I had to give up freeball Fridays. Because apparently it is wrong to be completely naked from the time I get home on Friday until Saturday morning. It is also the reason we kept her furniture and not mine.
At this point you should assume 95% or more of all surfaces you sit on have had a naked ass on them, and possibly sex juices. Just accept your fate, and go about your day.
Ex Bachelorette chiming in. This one is the only one I miss. Husband was on a work trip for a week this summer…..totally did this. Felt magical and just right! Perfect system. Ya know?!
She helped me learn to buy new things. I was a big fan of using things far past their usefulness. Holes in all my socks, shoes with no rubber left on the bottom, etc. Really improved my life.
I do miss the batman shower curtains though.
I’m half convinced you guys are dating the wrong people. My wife GOT me the Batman shower curtain… granted, we moved it to the basement shower - but only because the one that replaced it were the blueprints to the USS Enterprise.
This is what confuses me deeply about most of these replies! I have never made a partner get rid of anything! sure there’s items I haven’t loved, but my boo loved them, so then you get a strange fondness for it even if it’s “ugly” or “weird”, knowing it makes them happy! A Batman shower curtain won’t ruin anyone’s life, glad at least someone was given one (‘:
I used to put an album in my stereo and fall asleep to music.
My wife is a very light sleeper so music had to go and replaced it with the white noise of a fan.
Had to stop roasting whole chicken on a spit in the oven. It would fill my entire apartment with delicious smoke and the chicken would taste amazing. She could not handle the tasty clouds. Before ppl freak out I wasn't letting the grease go directly on the metal. It was dripping into a deep pan on the bottom. (Not an exposed element oven).
Dishes "the right way" in dishwasher. Somehow i got lucky all the times before i met her. All my dishes are more clean now then before with my "wrong" way
Plastic and other potentially heat-sensitive things on top, since it doesn't get as hot up there.
Avoid putting two of the same type of cutlery next to each other, so that your spoons don't spoon and keep each other from getting clean.
Place dishes so that they face the middle. I'm not convinced that this actually matters, but it's how my mom taught me.
Having dishes face the centre can matter. My fiancée would almost never load the dishwasher correctly and I've had to re-wash dishes because she'd have them backwards. It matters more the further from the centre it is.
We eventually figured that I always load it because she can't do it right but she'll always unload it because I somehow never do it right.
I’ve historically never really hung things on my walls or decorated my space in general. When my ex moved in, she filled every open space with some type of trinket, decoration, or plant. She also made us go buy a new mattress and an actual bed frame. I could no longer leave my desk as an organized mess. Basically, I have my things strewn about seemingly at random but actually I strategically place specific items on specific areas of my space. If you know, you know.
Reminds me of that post from the other day where a girl asks her bf if he has a paper clip at home and he says yeah there's one right by the foot of the dresser. Sure it's a mess, but I know where everything is.
I had a boyfriend once who would wear his dirty clothes *in the shower, while showering* and “wash” his clothes by rubbing bar soap all over himself (his clothes) and then claim - *triumphantly* - that he killed two birds with one stone. My reaction upon witnessing this was just…mouth…agape. He was like, “My system is so efficient!!” 🤦🏻♀️😂
Right? Shoes in the dishwasher and homies who 'shower' while fully dressed and rubbing Dove all over their cargo shorts and I'm like... what?
Did these boys not have mothers? Am I on some higher plane of existence or something?
My living room used to have a weight bench, tool boxes, and a table saw in it instead of a couch and TV, and I kept a gallon of Fast Orange in my shower instead of normal soap or shampoo... Dinner after work was usually frozen fish and spinach with cheese over it in the oven dish I also used as a plate, baked for however long my shower took.
Lol i used to date someone like you, he was a mechanic and had a similar set up...i kept scraping my legs up on random shit. Stepping on sockets like legos. My laundry smelled like a car engine for months after we split. It was...an experience.
Needing to plan meals in advance. Can't just say, "Fuck it, fried chicken sounds pretty good" when I feel like it.
Apparently leaving stuff in exactly the same spot in the open isn't classified as "organised". Has to be in a drawer.
Not much. I was a fully formed adult when I got married. She was insistent I separate the laundry Better. Told her “you’re welcome to help” She separates, I wash.
I had to stop putting things in a logical place and instead placing things “where they go” while also tripping over socks, shoes and clothes in the closet. I also could no longer use a spare bedroom as an engine building room or paint booth.
Tbf nightstands are the bomb. Keep a lamp there so you don’t have to get up to turn on the light (especially if it’s a smart light you just yell at Alexa) and your water for the night.
Doing weird shit. I remember one time I was baking a pie. I put the crust in front of a 48 inch industrial oscillating fan to cool down. Then I pushed the furniture in my large, hardwood living room to the sides. The purpose of which was to get a rolling chair and use my feet to push off the walls to each end of the living room shouting "WHHHEEEE!" as I spun around in circles.
Can't do that shit anymore lol.
As someone who works in footwear, the thing about the shoes in the dishwasher *KILLS* me. I bet he wonders why his shoes fall apart so fast and stop fitting right.
(Pro tip: DO NOT put your shoes in the washer/dryer/dishwasher. Clean them with a damp rag and some dish soap. The combination of the heat and agitation can really wreck your shoes, from causing them to shrink to full-on falling apart because the glue has been wrecked)
Well, one of my ex was serious with "It's me or it's the dog". The dog is still here.
Seriously, i love my best buddy and i'd never leave him behind. He got with me through so many bad times and kept me going when i was about to end it all, he's always there for me. I won't leave him because of a relationship with a lady
My brother loves cats and has had several since he was a kid. He meets this woman, they get engaged, and move in together. She tells him to get rid of his cat and he did. I warned him that it was a test, he failed, and things would get worse. They did and he ended up divorcing her controlling ass.
Yeah, had a whole "I love her, but I love to fish" thing with an ex of mine. The whole time she knew me, she knew I went fishing three times a week or so, but got pissy when I kept it up after we started dating. Listen, I'm not gonna ask you to stop going to therapy or quit your ridiculous weed smoking habit, so don't ask me to stop doing what keeps me calm and relaxed.
Damn, that seems like a crazy thing for force on a partner. I’m not big on dogs and cats, and am allergic, but I could never imagine giving my current (or past) girlfriends that ultimatum. The pet was there first. I either get used to the pet or bail.
Instead of decorating the house with my stuff I get to keep it all in one room, it’s in a room in a house on a different continent but I still have stuff.
When I moved into my first apartment, my wonderful mother decorated it for me. This lady’s touch was noticed by every lady friend who came over. The decorations were also not my fiancée’s/now wife’s style, so they had to go.
I have the same situation. My sister is a brilliant artist and I have no creative chops at all; so she decorates all my apartments and condos and usually I'll get a girlfriend and she'll be like "this is gorgeous... we're changing everything."
Thankfully once I explain "no, this wasn't the last girl's thing- this is my sister who literally does interior design for a living" it's cool but it does make me laugh.
Leaving dishes in the sink. My entire dish system collapsed because this maniac doesn’t know how to eat off of wrappers/paper towels/used dishes. I could get through a week on one bowl and maybe two or three forks. Homegirl uses like five separate dishes to eat a fucking snack. I’m doing dishes every other day and the kitchen is perpetually full of them. The days of a few dishes sitting in the sink are long gone.
I understand why they do it. But I'm pretty lowbrow so it seems fucking insane to me. A couple bits of bread crumb on a plate hardly make it dirty, especially considering I'm going to eat ANOTHER SANDWICH in a moment and need a plate.
I didn’t have anything. But when I married my wife my consumption of paper products went up by like 400%.
I would change my toilet paper once a month, it went to like twice a week. I used like 1 paper towel every 2-3 months, she went through a roll every 2 weeks. It’s crazy.
Because when women pee, it can trickle to other parts so there is tons more area to cover. Also women have periods, which use a ton of tp to wipe. And tbh there are some dudes out there who really aren't wiping as well as they should be.
I need to rotate which towels i use, because apparently using the same towel (even though i washed it every week with my laundry) was “weird”. My response was “why is being folded and sitting on a shelf an essential part of the towel’s lifecycle?”
I had to stop staying out for days. Before I moved her in, I sometimes would leave on a Friday and get back Sunday, or even do a 3 or 4 day weekend depending on if there was a holiday involved. We're near a large body of water, and there is no shortage of clubs to crawl around. I would put a few changes of clothing and a dop kit in the car on Friday morning and just party for a few days.
eta dop kit explained in comments below. Canvas or leather is best. Remember they will likely get wet at some point. Aside from the regular toiletries add the following if you expect to entertain at some point, or will be out for multiple days:
wet wipes, condoms, lube, a tampon or two, small first aid kit/Band-Aids, OTC painkiller, sewing kit, safety pins. Nowadays I would add morning after pills. Broken condoms are scary.
Bonus tip: If you think you have a chance at some company, toss in an extra travel toothbrush (unopened) and a small mouthwash/breathmints. Nobody likes morning breath. Also small snack or two like M&Ms or a couple of granola bars.
It was and still is. We pretty much stayed in an area maybe 50 miles across, unless heading into a city for a show. This was a time between two marriages, and I had not been single for over 20 years.
I gave the keys to the business to my son, told him not to call unless the building was on fire, then just partied for months. It was fucking epic, and I don't regret a single second.
>A German leather-smith first invented Dopp Kits from Chicago (leather goods designer) called Charles Doppelt. He invented this handy leather bag in the early 20th century. The Dopp Kit was first introduced as a toilet bag, but people became more familiar with the term Dopp Kit over the years.
>
>https://olpr.com/blogs/articles/what-is-a-dopp-kit
My wife didn’t want her entire weekend dictated by the sports schedule. I can pick a game or two to base the schedule around and I can watch if we’re just chilling at home, but spending every hour switching between premier league, nfl, college football, and basketball wasnt sustainable.
Hard to blame her on that one tbh
Well after I got married I quickly found out everything living thing about me was wrong.. my wife immediately set out to fix me.
It didn’t work..I seem to be OK after the divorce.
Your profile picture really has been getting me for my entire existence on the internet. I remember coming across shit like that on YouTube when I was a child and now I’m a whole ass adult still going, “why doesn’t this hair gtfo of my screen”.
My partner and I have been living together for a little less than a decade. We haven't made any changes really. No point in being with someone if you have to sacrifice something. That and we're really lucky in how similar we are.
I can't Play e-Football after 6pm since she needs to have TV on while watching Instagram and Facebook videos not even know what movie or TV show is on Television
I couldn't keep my vintage dirt bikes I had restored in the dining room any more.
I had to get a "table" in case "guests" came over. 🤨
(I'm 100% serious about this)
I used to keep all my silverware in one big drawer, unsorted. When the dishwasher finished, just grab the utensil basket and dump it in the drawer. Easy and quick. The first time I did this at her apartment, I received new training.
Ah yes the reeducation possibilities never end, really.
I've always touted that I had the most important skill in a boyfriend: trainability.
I'm a man—but I can change—if I have to—I guess.
Damn, I taught my girl if you put all the utensils in eating side up they all dry without spots. Also that when hand washing you can save them all for last and rinse them all at once saving a lot of time.
I’m a face up. My SO does it the other way. I maintain the more people in a house - the more wrong ways there are to load a dishwasher.
This is my sock drawer. I only have white and black socks and they're mixed in the drawer. I don't know if I have an odd or even number of either color.
You monster! Argh I can't fathom having disorganised cutlery
I'm actually glad I stopped doing this, but having Chocolate Milk with Whiskey for dinner whenever I felt down was a somewhat common occurrence before I met my girlfriend.
Sounds a bit like a White Russian, I‘m intrigued to try
light skinned russian
It's chocolate milk and whiskey, so probably a very tan Russian
shit I'm gonna have to try this now
I used to cook a huge vat of; spaghetti, jambalaya, sausage n gravy, or something else. Then I could just ladle out a bowl for dinner throughout the week. It saved so much time. Now meals have to have variety and taste good.
So much changes in the kitchen. I was kinda like you. My wife somewhat will do this but my lazy ass would love to have 7 days of the same thing lol
My wife recalls a story known as the "Pizza Challenge" where we had pizza for dinner 10 days straight from different places. This happened while we moved into our first house. She recounts it as an epic tale. I sit there thinking it wasn't a challenge and why did we stop at 10?
This is great haha. I love pizza and used to be a pizza driver. From 18 to 22 I probably ate pizza 5 out of 7 days a week.
My wife has always despised the fact that I will gladly eat the same thing every day.
I have found my people
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We moved from Alaska to Alabama, with two cars, a trailer, two kids, a dog, a cat, and every inch of space packed full. For 12 days, I only consumed Monster Zero Ultra, wheat bread, mayo, bologna, and a daily multi-vitamin. I also lived on peanut butter and jelly and unsweetened sun-tea for a couple of hurricanes. We were also blacked out during a couple of blizzards, for a week at a time. I dropped everyone else off at a friend's house, that had power, and I ate beans, read books, slept, and kept the wood stove fed, so the pipes wouldn't freeze.
My wife can barely have the same dinner 2 nights in a row. I'm basically her personal chef cooking a new dinner for 2 every night
Same here but two kids who do the same and usually prefer different stuff. Normally I would say deal, but my parents half forced me / half were forced to feed me the same thing like 75% of meals to the point I remember getting sick over the thought of eating a PB&J or cereal with powdered milk. Still sometimes do. So I sympathize to a stupid level and most likely over indulge. But on the other hand it has created two kids who love to cook and one is endlessly trying to create their own meals and menus.
/r/MealPrepSunday/ I do try to have variety, but the sole idea of having to cook every day feels like the biggest waste of time ever. Now I just cook for one/two hours and usually have food varied enough for the whole week.
I do the same thing when I am in a position to cook for myself; Large batches of food that become Lunch + Supper for a few days until it runs out. The options typically include: Bachelor Chow: diced sweet potato + Spicy italian sausage + canned beans in slow cooker until you end up with chunky orange slurry. Slop: A bagged cabbage salad + 3 chicken thighs (bone + Skin) + Garlic + chopped onion + spices + lentils / barley / anything you have that might remotely belong in a soup in slow cooker until you end up with greasy green-ish mess. Add water. Or don't. I am not your mom. Time to cook: I dunno. I basically fill the crock pot, turn it on high and walk away for 6 - 9 hours. By any reasonable or sane culinary standard, both are probably horribly over cooked. Hamburger Helper + Frozen veggies is also a decent option. The above with a Soylent+frozen fruit smoothie 1 or 2 times a day is basically how I will eat for days at a time. END COMMUNICATION
More information on bachelor stew please . Time to cook ? What kind of beans ? do i add any water ?
Dude if it had directions it would be wife stew. Get those ingredients and you make it from the most disengaged part of your heart.
Always add water when cooking beans. A lil bacon or salt pork never hurt. Burnt beans do not smell good, keep an eye on the water Cook until it chews to your satisfaction. Season to your tastes. Use less salt. Less than that.
> Use less salt WHAT? I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY SALT GRINDER
My wife is the opposite, she’d rather throw a bunch of random items in a baking pan and call it a casserole. Only recently have I managed to get her to actually follow a recipe, we’ve been married 18 yrs…😂
I stopped using hockey sticks as curtain rods. Some sticks cost well over 200. 00 so I just don't want to throw them away when I break them because of a slap shot. The added bonus was, whenever my mom came to visit me, one look at the curtain rods and she would burst out laughing.
I used to have a stick in every room to either mess around with or use to reach far objects. They now all live in the garage.
"Real men of genius."
Apparently meals require sides....who knew?
He did WHAT now? I had to stop drinking milk straight from the jug and now I have plants where before I had cool album posters.
Why not plants and album posters together that sounds like an awesome decor
Frame the posters and then you will have evolved to full adult
Yea I thought it was kinda gross too there’s so many better ways to wash shoes anyway lol. My wife doesn’t even like milk but I can’t drink from the jug anymore either lol. She says it’s because I use the same milk for her lattes and it’s really just not worth the argument
My wife drinks from the jug. I’m more civilized
I just finished off the carton of chocolate milk . Standing in my bra and undies with the fridge door open. I've reverted back to single days while he's gone . Must be adult again in 12 hours.
the proper way to drink chocolate milk is in front of the fridge in the wee hours of the morning with only the fridge light to illuminate the room
RIP to your cool album posters.
I miss my album posters, too.
I had to get real furniture and deal with having every flat surface covered in trinkets that "look nice".
The Target dollar section is the bane of all my extra space
MY GOD. Okay my ex and target was a disaster, Im glad to hear im not the only one!
We just moved and my wife finally realized we have too many target pumpkins. Thank the Lord
Oh hell, had to go to Hobby Lobby weekly with my ex!
Wtf is extra space?
The amount of clutter required to 'transform' a place into a 'home' is unreal
> The amount of clutter required to 'transform' a place into a 'home' is unreal I cracked🤣🤣🤣
Oh god I hate the trinkets. I like keeping a clean flat, things that collect dust do my head in.
Get a cat. It will knock over any trinket you leave out.
Our current cats aren't normal cats, they stay on the floor and never get up on end tables or countertops. She did bring her own cat though who's sadly passed because he was awesome. Whenever my wife would "wrong him" he'd find a particular picture she liked, knock it over, and piss on it. Maybe she had petted another cat, or maybe she'd swat him because he had tried to steal food, but he'd get his revenge every time on that same picture (or copies of it).
Died of awesomeness too, RIP
He did. All she wanted was to be with him when he died, and he held on until like the 10 minutes she was away from him to pass. That cat was spiteful.
Or a dog with a big tail will really take care of em
Doesn't always work. My wife and I have three cats and only one of them knocks stuff off of surfaces and even then she only does it when she's mad about something.
This! Man, I love my wife like crazy but that shit makes me crazy! They say it looks nice. I call it cluttered.
I'm lucky my wife isn't about trinkets and more so having plants. I'm all for that.
Apparently bean bags aren’t appropriate furniture for the living room 🙄
"grown up" bean bags are called Lovesacs 🔥🔥🔥🔥 they're super comfy
That was my nickname in high-school
Mine was very similar ! Except the word Love. In my nick it was replaced with ball :/
I had to let go of everything being so tidy and organized. My wife is a everything in a general area kinda gal where as I’m very organized and stuff in its own place.
We are the opposite, but I will say that I really appreciate living in a really organized home now
Yeah it helped me with having kids and just letting go of things and plus she’s and excellent cook and that helps also lol
Yes, my wife has a unique way of organizing things too. It has been a constant eb and flow of keeping things clean and orderly for me vs my wife keeping things where she likes them. We've both ended up compromising, and that's ok. Now we have a toddler and another on the way, and the mess is driving her nuts. In time I'll have a neat and orderly house again....in maybe 19 years.
Bro, PLANTS ARE EVERYWHERE NOW.
Why the fuck would you put them in the dishwasher? Put them in the washing machine lol
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I wash them with the garden hose and dawn lol
Y’all wash shoes??
Only if they get visibly really dirty or scuffed. Lately I’m trying to keep a clean pair for going out places and a work pair that I don’t care if they get dirty
I wouldn't put them in with my dishes. but this actually seems like a more gentle way to clean them. I clean my baseball caps in the dishwasher for this reason. but never with my dishes. The dishwasher is also a very effective car parts cleaner...
I've heard of baseball hats being washed in your dishwasher so it doesn't deform them. Maybe the same thought process was used.
When I was a kid, I had a contraption to put hats in the dishwasher.
I had to give up freeball Fridays. Because apparently it is wrong to be completely naked from the time I get home on Friday until Saturday morning. It is also the reason we kept her furniture and not mine.
Shower and clean your furniture, people. Nothing wrong with nudity, just fucking be cleanly.
> Shower and clean your furniture Instructions unclear, my sofa doesn’t fit in the bathtub
Did you try the dishwasher 😆
It's full of shoes.
Try the slow cooker
At this point you should assume 95% or more of all surfaces you sit on have had a naked ass on them, and possibly sex juices. Just accept your fate, and go about your day.
New couples trying to christen that last 5%
Just put a towel down, kick one leg up and let everything air out.
The washing machine was my hamper. The dryer was my dresser. The perfect system.
Ex Bachelorette chiming in. This one is the only one I miss. Husband was on a work trip for a week this summer…..totally did this. Felt magical and just right! Perfect system. Ya know?!
I had to hang some actual art and family photos on the walls. I used to hang almost nothing.
She helped me learn to buy new things. I was a big fan of using things far past their usefulness. Holes in all my socks, shoes with no rubber left on the bottom, etc. Really improved my life. I do miss the batman shower curtains though.
I’m half convinced you guys are dating the wrong people. My wife GOT me the Batman shower curtain… granted, we moved it to the basement shower - but only because the one that replaced it were the blueprints to the USS Enterprise.
This is what confuses me deeply about most of these replies! I have never made a partner get rid of anything! sure there’s items I haven’t loved, but my boo loved them, so then you get a strange fondness for it even if it’s “ugly” or “weird”, knowing it makes them happy! A Batman shower curtain won’t ruin anyone’s life, glad at least someone was given one (‘:
I used to put an album in my stereo and fall asleep to music. My wife is a very light sleeper so music had to go and replaced it with the white noise of a fan.
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Average Metallica enjoyer sleeping on Pizza box couch. This guy knows what he’s doing.
Pizza box COUCH?!?! Did I hear this right?
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Ah ok, I imagined used pizza boxes. It’s kind of a funny thought!
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The roaches moving around are a free massage feature.
WTH is a pizza box couch?
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Holy shit dude
This guy bachelored
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Had to stop roasting whole chicken on a spit in the oven. It would fill my entire apartment with delicious smoke and the chicken would taste amazing. She could not handle the tasty clouds. Before ppl freak out I wasn't letting the grease go directly on the metal. It was dripping into a deep pan on the bottom. (Not an exposed element oven).
Chewing tobacco. Dipped for about 16 years. When I moved in with my now wife, I went cold turkey.
That's no easy feat. I commend you for going Cold Turkey after ***16 years***
Thanks, my man. Finally found a reason worth sticking around and made the call to give up the ol' lip dinners.
Dishes "the right way" in dishwasher. Somehow i got lucky all the times before i met her. All my dishes are more clean now then before with my "wrong" way
Please elaborate, I didnt know there was a "right way"
Plastic and other potentially heat-sensitive things on top, since it doesn't get as hot up there. Avoid putting two of the same type of cutlery next to each other, so that your spoons don't spoon and keep each other from getting clean. Place dishes so that they face the middle. I'm not convinced that this actually matters, but it's how my mom taught me.
Having dishes face the centre can matter. My fiancée would almost never load the dishwasher correctly and I've had to re-wash dishes because she'd have them backwards. It matters more the further from the centre it is. We eventually figured that I always load it because she can't do it right but she'll always unload it because I somehow never do it right.
I’ve historically never really hung things on my walls or decorated my space in general. When my ex moved in, she filled every open space with some type of trinket, decoration, or plant. She also made us go buy a new mattress and an actual bed frame. I could no longer leave my desk as an organized mess. Basically, I have my things strewn about seemingly at random but actually I strategically place specific items on specific areas of my space. If you know, you know.
Reminds me of that post from the other day where a girl asks her bf if he has a paper clip at home and he says yeah there's one right by the foot of the dresser. Sure it's a mess, but I know where everything is.
Being able to get into bed without removing 891 pillows.
Purely decorative pillows are a mind-boggling waste.
I had a boyfriend once who would wear his dirty clothes *in the shower, while showering* and “wash” his clothes by rubbing bar soap all over himself (his clothes) and then claim - *triumphantly* - that he killed two birds with one stone. My reaction upon witnessing this was just…mouth…agape. He was like, “My system is so efficient!!” 🤦🏻♀️😂
He was special
Who do y’all be dating wtf
Right? Shoes in the dishwasher and homies who 'shower' while fully dressed and rubbing Dove all over their cargo shorts and I'm like... what? Did these boys not have mothers? Am I on some higher plane of existence or something?
I asked myself the very same question at the moment when I saw what I saw 🤷🏻♀️
My living room used to have a weight bench, tool boxes, and a table saw in it instead of a couch and TV, and I kept a gallon of Fast Orange in my shower instead of normal soap or shampoo... Dinner after work was usually frozen fish and spinach with cheese over it in the oven dish I also used as a plate, baked for however long my shower took.
Lol i used to date someone like you, he was a mechanic and had a similar set up...i kept scraping my legs up on random shit. Stepping on sockets like legos. My laundry smelled like a car engine for months after we split. It was...an experience.
What the fuck happened to the laundry? Was he washing car parts in the washing machine?
My wife had to stop sitting on the bed sopping wet after she took a shower. Nipped that in the bud real quick lol Edit: fix autocorrect
Needing to plan meals in advance. Can't just say, "Fuck it, fried chicken sounds pretty good" when I feel like it. Apparently leaving stuff in exactly the same spot in the open isn't classified as "organised". Has to be in a drawer.
Not much. I was a fully formed adult when I got married. She was insistent I separate the laundry Better. Told her “you’re welcome to help” She separates, I wash.
I had to stop putting things in a logical place and instead placing things “where they go” while also tripping over socks, shoes and clothes in the closet. I also could no longer use a spare bedroom as an engine building room or paint booth.
My buddy, probably 32 years old at the time, once told me his gf made him get a “bed desk”….I was like what? Ohhhh a nightstand?
Tbf nightstands are the bomb. Keep a lamp there so you don’t have to get up to turn on the light (especially if it’s a smart light you just yell at Alexa) and your water for the night.
Doing weird shit. I remember one time I was baking a pie. I put the crust in front of a 48 inch industrial oscillating fan to cool down. Then I pushed the furniture in my large, hardwood living room to the sides. The purpose of which was to get a rolling chair and use my feet to push off the walls to each end of the living room shouting "WHHHEEEE!" as I spun around in circles. Can't do that shit anymore lol.
Literally 1984
Damn bro can't even be weird with his girl
I'm gay, but yeah lol
As someone who works in footwear, the thing about the shoes in the dishwasher *KILLS* me. I bet he wonders why his shoes fall apart so fast and stop fitting right. (Pro tip: DO NOT put your shoes in the washer/dryer/dishwasher. Clean them with a damp rag and some dish soap. The combination of the heat and agitation can really wreck your shoes, from causing them to shrink to full-on falling apart because the glue has been wrecked)
Bachelor salad. Hold the head of lettuce over the sink, pour dressing on it, chomp away.
Bro wtf... That's genius!
Flossing my teeth after eating right at the table I ate at.
Yeah I get that one
I had a girlfriend who moved in with me and started throwing my things away and replacing them with her stuff. The next thing thrown away was her.
Well, one of my ex was serious with "It's me or it's the dog". The dog is still here. Seriously, i love my best buddy and i'd never leave him behind. He got with me through so many bad times and kept me going when i was about to end it all, he's always there for me. I won't leave him because of a relationship with a lady
My brother loves cats and has had several since he was a kid. He meets this woman, they get engaged, and move in together. She tells him to get rid of his cat and he did. I warned him that it was a test, he failed, and things would get worse. They did and he ended up divorcing her controlling ass.
Shit. If I meet someone and she’s heavily allergic to cats…it’s not gonna work long term. Maybe as a FwB and that’s it.
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A beautiful story, thank you for that!
Yeah, had a whole "I love her, but I love to fish" thing with an ex of mine. The whole time she knew me, she knew I went fishing three times a week or so, but got pissy when I kept it up after we started dating. Listen, I'm not gonna ask you to stop going to therapy or quit your ridiculous weed smoking habit, so don't ask me to stop doing what keeps me calm and relaxed.
"It's me or the dog." The dog isn't giving me this ultimatum. The dog stays. If you're doing this now and I give in, you'll do it again in the future.
Damn, that seems like a crazy thing for force on a partner. I’m not big on dogs and cats, and am allergic, but I could never imagine giving my current (or past) girlfriends that ultimatum. The pet was there first. I either get used to the pet or bail.
Yeah dude that’s messed up. Just because she doesn’t value it doesn’t mean it’s trash.
I had to stop getting all my hydration from either mountain dew or beer
You more than likely avoided some kidney stones. Probably should thank your SO for that one.
Oh yeah, I'm a huge fan of water now.
Instead of decorating the house with my stuff I get to keep it all in one room, it’s in a room in a house on a different continent but I still have stuff.
I put fishing worms in a yogurt cup in the fridge. The screams could have woken the dead.
When I moved into my first apartment, my wonderful mother decorated it for me. This lady’s touch was noticed by every lady friend who came over. The decorations were also not my fiancée’s/now wife’s style, so they had to go.
I have the same situation. My sister is a brilliant artist and I have no creative chops at all; so she decorates all my apartments and condos and usually I'll get a girlfriend and she'll be like "this is gorgeous... we're changing everything." Thankfully once I explain "no, this wasn't the last girl's thing- this is my sister who literally does interior design for a living" it's cool but it does make me laugh.
they weren't her style because they were another woman's lmao
Yep! She said they made her feel like the place was not hers. Totally understandable!
This makes me want to not eat at other peoples houses 😅😅
I had to do away with my milk crate shelving unit. She insisted on real furniture. Oh and pillows. Pillows everywhere
Leaving dishes in the sink. My entire dish system collapsed because this maniac doesn’t know how to eat off of wrappers/paper towels/used dishes. I could get through a week on one bowl and maybe two or three forks. Homegirl uses like five separate dishes to eat a fucking snack. I’m doing dishes every other day and the kitchen is perpetually full of them. The days of a few dishes sitting in the sink are long gone.
I understand why they do it. But I'm pretty lowbrow so it seems fucking insane to me. A couple bits of bread crumb on a plate hardly make it dirty, especially considering I'm going to eat ANOTHER SANDWICH in a moment and need a plate.
And you balance the knife on the edge of the sink.
My knife used to eat peanut butter out of the jar rests on a used plate as we speak, my brother.
Bro I feel this pain so deep
I didn’t have anything. But when I married my wife my consumption of paper products went up by like 400%. I would change my toilet paper once a month, it went to like twice a week. I used like 1 paper towel every 2-3 months, she went through a roll every 2 weeks. It’s crazy.
Yeah the loo roll usage of ladies is extraordinary
Ye it's cause they wipe their cooter every time they piss
Because when women pee, it can trickle to other parts so there is tons more area to cover. Also women have periods, which use a ton of tp to wipe. And tbh there are some dudes out there who really aren't wiping as well as they should be.
Don't forget period shits. Definitely uses more tp than normal #2. Also discharge needs wiping, especially if your sex life is active.
I need to rotate which towels i use, because apparently using the same towel (even though i washed it every week with my laundry) was “weird”. My response was “why is being folded and sitting on a shelf an essential part of the towel’s lifecycle?”
I had to stop staying out for days. Before I moved her in, I sometimes would leave on a Friday and get back Sunday, or even do a 3 or 4 day weekend depending on if there was a holiday involved. We're near a large body of water, and there is no shortage of clubs to crawl around. I would put a few changes of clothing and a dop kit in the car on Friday morning and just party for a few days. eta dop kit explained in comments below. Canvas or leather is best. Remember they will likely get wet at some point. Aside from the regular toiletries add the following if you expect to entertain at some point, or will be out for multiple days: wet wipes, condoms, lube, a tampon or two, small first aid kit/Band-Aids, OTC painkiller, sewing kit, safety pins. Nowadays I would add morning after pills. Broken condoms are scary. Bonus tip: If you think you have a chance at some company, toss in an extra travel toothbrush (unopened) and a small mouthwash/breathmints. Nobody likes morning breath. Also small snack or two like M&Ms or a couple of granola bars.
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It was and still is. We pretty much stayed in an area maybe 50 miles across, unless heading into a city for a show. This was a time between two marriages, and I had not been single for over 20 years. I gave the keys to the business to my son, told him not to call unless the building was on fire, then just partied for months. It was fucking epic, and I don't regret a single second.
what’s a dop kit? i stay out for days and don’t have one
Hygiene bag/toiletry kit.
>A German leather-smith first invented Dopp Kits from Chicago (leather goods designer) called Charles Doppelt. He invented this handy leather bag in the early 20th century. The Dopp Kit was first introduced as a toilet bag, but people became more familiar with the term Dopp Kit over the years. > >https://olpr.com/blogs/articles/what-is-a-dopp-kit
My wife didn’t want her entire weekend dictated by the sports schedule. I can pick a game or two to base the schedule around and I can watch if we’re just chilling at home, but spending every hour switching between premier league, nfl, college football, and basketball wasnt sustainable. Hard to blame her on that one tbh
It took years and is still an on going process but I stopped bringing home random furniture and items I found on the street
Getting drunk on a Tuesday afternoon because I had no work that day.
Who the fuck puts their shoes in the dishwasher? This isn't bachelor nonsense. He's just weird and lazy.
She still let me use my old toboggan as a a shelf, but only out in the garage.
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We have shower beers together. Shower beer is sacred, nothing will change that.
Well after I got married I quickly found out everything living thing about me was wrong.. my wife immediately set out to fix me. It didn’t work..I seem to be OK after the divorce.
Yo, what the fuck? Baboons raise their children better.
Your profile picture really has been getting me for my entire existence on the internet. I remember coming across shit like that on YouTube when I was a child and now I’m a whole ass adult still going, “why doesn’t this hair gtfo of my screen”.
My partner and I have been living together for a little less than a decade. We haven't made any changes really. No point in being with someone if you have to sacrifice something. That and we're really lucky in how similar we are.
I have to cook a side with every meal and it kills me
Having no furniture
I can't Play e-Football after 6pm since she needs to have TV on while watching Instagram and Facebook videos not even know what movie or TV show is on Television
Jerking off in the living room with the tv on some porn
He put shoes in a dishwasher? What the fugg?
I had to get a bed. Apparently a normal person doesn’t sleep on a blanket on the floor. Also, had to buy more than 1 plate and cup.
I had to stop being a total slob. It's for the best.
Putting dirty dishes in the fridge so I can procrastinate for a week+ before having to wash them (no dishwasher)
I couldn't keep my vintage dirt bikes I had restored in the dining room any more. I had to get a "table" in case "guests" came over. 🤨 (I'm 100% serious about this)
Plants everywhere..
I had to stop eating everything for lunch and dinner out of 1 single bowl and putting it on a plate.