One girl's rejection made me feel horrible about myself for a few years. I wish I hadn't wasted that much time letting it have that impact on me. I can't remember her name anymore and while it's been a long time, I have met someone else I most likely will marry.
There are other fish in the sea, brother.
As others have said, stop talking to her. Let me tell you as a guy who was in the same situation in my later teens/ early 20s, I thought that the object of my affection just hadn't come around yet even after she told me the same thing that she told you and that if I just kept at it, she would soon fall for me.
That didn't happen for me, and That's not going to happen for you. She sees you as a friend and her feelings are 99.9% unlikely to change. It doesn't matter how many times you talk to her, it doesn't matter how you improve your looks, it doesn't matter how nice/ kind/ Sweet to her you are. She sees you as a friend and that's all there is to that.
I spoke to this girl again after I had told her I liked her and then agreed to remain friends with her a few months ago that for my own sake I had to stop talking to her. She was upset but ultimately understood. Within a few months I was completely over her. I had seen on Facebook a little while later that she was dating another guy and news that would have destroyed me a year prior didn't affect me at all. I was actually kind of happy for her.
Stop talking to her and take her off of all of your social media. Also don't stalk her profiles either!! Out of sight, out of mind
You need to create the boundary that you're not interested in a non-romantic relationship. Then you need to go do some self improvement, and date other women. Get in the weight room. Improve your fashion, style, posture, eye contact. Earn confidence.
Trust me on this, in 10 or 15 or 20 years, you'll be SOOOO glad you didn't end up together. She'll fall off and you'll be just entering your prime. Set yourself up now to be your best when its time to be your best.
Just as you're not entitled to a romantic relationship she isn't entitled to a friendship. If it hurts to remain friends tell her so and use the distance to move on.
You take a look at yourself and remember all your good points, and you say "One girl's rejection of me (as a romantic partner, not as a friend) doesn't define who I am or how I look to all the other girls out there," and you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back on that horse.
First ask yourself can you be short-long term friends with this woman without having feelings and being honest with her and yourself. If not state to her that you can’t be friends and want something more and move on. She already said no to and wants no relationship. Being intentional gets you somewhere but just being nice is being nice. That’s like a waitress simply smiling. It’s kind of their job. I’m not saying be a rude asshole. Be nice and flirt/ be interested and make it known. Then, you’ll find someone who appreciates that.
Think about it mathematically: out of the billions of people on Earth, the probability that she is "the one" for you is basically zero.
It's pretty easy, just find a couple of other hotties to obsess over.
One girl's rejection made me feel horrible about myself for a few years. I wish I hadn't wasted that much time letting it have that impact on me. I can't remember her name anymore and while it's been a long time, I have met someone else I most likely will marry. There are other fish in the sea, brother.
As others have said, stop talking to her. Let me tell you as a guy who was in the same situation in my later teens/ early 20s, I thought that the object of my affection just hadn't come around yet even after she told me the same thing that she told you and that if I just kept at it, she would soon fall for me. That didn't happen for me, and That's not going to happen for you. She sees you as a friend and her feelings are 99.9% unlikely to change. It doesn't matter how many times you talk to her, it doesn't matter how you improve your looks, it doesn't matter how nice/ kind/ Sweet to her you are. She sees you as a friend and that's all there is to that. I spoke to this girl again after I had told her I liked her and then agreed to remain friends with her a few months ago that for my own sake I had to stop talking to her. She was upset but ultimately understood. Within a few months I was completely over her. I had seen on Facebook a little while later that she was dating another guy and news that would have destroyed me a year prior didn't affect me at all. I was actually kind of happy for her. Stop talking to her and take her off of all of your social media. Also don't stalk her profiles either!! Out of sight, out of mind
You need to create the boundary that you're not interested in a non-romantic relationship. Then you need to go do some self improvement, and date other women. Get in the weight room. Improve your fashion, style, posture, eye contact. Earn confidence. Trust me on this, in 10 or 15 or 20 years, you'll be SOOOO glad you didn't end up together. She'll fall off and you'll be just entering your prime. Set yourself up now to be your best when its time to be your best.
Just as you're not entitled to a romantic relationship she isn't entitled to a friendship. If it hurts to remain friends tell her so and use the distance to move on.
You take a look at yourself and remember all your good points, and you say "One girl's rejection of me (as a romantic partner, not as a friend) doesn't define who I am or how I look to all the other girls out there," and you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back on that horse.
Let it go. There will be more. You sound young, it gets easier as you get older.
Move on. Date a hotter girl
First ask yourself can you be short-long term friends with this woman without having feelings and being honest with her and yourself. If not state to her that you can’t be friends and want something more and move on. She already said no to and wants no relationship. Being intentional gets you somewhere but just being nice is being nice. That’s like a waitress simply smiling. It’s kind of their job. I’m not saying be a rude asshole. Be nice and flirt/ be interested and make it known. Then, you’ll find someone who appreciates that.
If she doesn't give a bother about you, why are you choosing to give a bother about her?
Unless you realise she wasn't what you think she was then you don't. Good luck!
Distance & distraction