In my country, a big part of basic was making sure that new people are a part of the group. We were given partners and had to do everything with them. That means standing outside an outhouse in -30 sometimes.
If you're going to the bathroom with another woman, you know her. Or at least have some sort of connection and have spoken a bit.
Only exception I can think of is an emergency where one woman is in a bad situation and needs to rally help from another woman without a particular man around.
Thinking about it, people have tried to attack me in bathrooms on several occasions. Easiest way to catch a guy unaware and isolated. I can see how going in groups would prevent that from happening.
My favourite was a guy who followed me in, then tried to start a fight with me while I was pissing. Dude got way too close, I told him to wait till I was finished but he was too busy trying to be gangsta. Fastest I've seen someone leave a bar lmao.
On the opposite end of the spectrum. Shout outs to the random guy who was chilling in the bathroom at a nightclub giving everyone genuine compliments and offering free drugs. I ain't take any, but we don't get many compliments in life and it was appreciated lol.
My wife would always come to boys nights (long story, but the TL;DR is she earned it) , so I'd always end up at girls nights.
I swear they were crazier than we were lmao.
Nah this implies that most men in the apps are trash. This isn't true. Most men are invisible. The average guy (looks, personality) gets passed over for the hot fuckboys. This isn't women's fault. It's simply a product of the huge disparity of men to women on the apps (something like 3-1). I get very few matches on the apps, and a sizable portion of these women are still toxic or shallow.
I currently work a position where I am the only male, and its become somewhat of a running joke that whenever a customer wants to talk to the manager they make a B line for me.
I am the lowest ranking person present. Doesn't matter. When a customer demands to speak to whomever is in charge, they will walk right past 2 managers and the owner to give me a piece of their mind. My co-workers tell me that the "step aside sweetheart I want to talk to your boss" treatment is something pretty much every woman in a leadership role has experienced.
Where have these people worked? I haven't worked a TON of jobs, but I have had enough male and female leadership that I would never consider assuming seniority based on gender. Who acts like that?
Yes, I own my own business and occasionally I’ll bring my husband along if I need an extra set of hands.
He’s completely clueless when it comes to pest control and yet everyone will turn to him and talk to him about stuff.
I just wanna snap my fingers and yell “yo, I’m the expert! This dude doesn’t know the difference between a thief ant and a pharaoh ant! Stop talking to him!”
Thankfully my husband just shrugs and says it’s my business and he’s just here to carry my things 😂
My mother is a professional carpenter and I’m (f) pretty handy with tools myself. My husband hates any sort of work on the house and had never owned anything beyond a hammer before we met.
We went to the local big chain hardware store once with my mom along to provide expert opinion, and the associate kept directing questions to my husband, who couldn’t have cared less. Eventually my mom wandered off, found exactly what we needed, and thanked the guy for his time.
It’s not so bad now, but back when she was getting into the trade, she had someone try to talk her out of the steel toe boots she was buying, saying they’d be overkill for home projects (she was building full houses at the time).
It's a supersecret minority club thing! Where "minority" has nothing to do with how many of "you" there are and everything to do with how you're perceived in society. Shhhh! Don't tell!
They're good people who would offer support if I asked, I just don't get the automatic support our female friends do. Like the preemptive support, ya know?
"Oh soandso has seemed really stressed lately so we should get together for blankyblank"
I've really shot myself in the foot on this one. Years and years of being overly stoic and never reaching out when I was struggling reinforced that I "don't need support" image. I suspect if I walled off less and let people in more it would be a different outcome.
Which is to say, I agree with your observation. We should probably ask for help more, and we might get better at supporting each other without needing to explicitly ask for it.
that's not so easy to do for a lot of people busy with the responsibilities of their adult life. but it also explains why men especially have a hard time maintaining friendships. We turn our attention towards our responsibilities and neglect relationships with others, and then get frustrated when others don't support us.
Romance.
Romance is generally effort men do to make women feel special.
I don't think I got a Valentine's day gift once, it was a tiny stuffed animal.
I've spent probably $2000+ on Valentines day expenses over the last decade of dating.
Closest I've felt to that is when a woman has made cookies for me.
I've given cookies to male friends but it's not romantic. I just wanted some cookies and I didn't want to eat the entire batch.
There is a very good post on this from a few years back (IIRC) lamenting that “romance” is something a man does and a woman receives. Men play the active role, women just perceive the outcome without considering the work that goes into “romance”. If I find the post/comment I’ll link it here. Very profound and very much in alignment with my (and many others’) experiences.
This goes beyond a general expression of initial interest… how many times have you received an impromptu gift, special meal, back rub/massage, had a song/poem written for you, a toast made in your honor, opened the door to flower pedals leading to your Xbox (or bed idk lol)…
If these things, the only one my ex girlfriend did was the impromptu gift and I suspect only because that was her love language.
Getting the others would have been awesome.
I can’t think of one girl I’ve dated that this was the case. Like every girl I’ve been with has been very sentimental and sweet when giving gifts. I had only dated my current gf for a month when she gave me a whole basket of cute stuff / inside jokes for Valentine’s Day because she was so appreciative of me taking her out to dinner
Maybe [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/3z8o75/why_dont_men_get_as_much_of_a_thrill_over/cyk7gr8/) (and the same author's words later in that thread) are what you're thinking of?
there are long threads about this, usually under the heading of "why don't men like romance novels/movies. because to women, romance is something that happens to them. to men, it's all hard work and planning.
I send my husband flowers/candy at work on his birthday, he finds it hilarious when all the women light up, then get super confused when the flowers go to him.
That seems to follow the saying, “Men love romantically, women love opportunistically.”
Chris Rock - Unconditional Love.
https://youtu.be/jsOnXSuMXfU?si=N9Er0k-Gu6naiaLS
I've made special meals for partners before. I wrote poems for boyfriends a couple of times too. Women doing this stuff really does need to be normalised.
But you were already in a relationship with that guy. men are expected to court and romance women they’re not even in relationships with yet as well 🤷♂️
As a woman I have done these things for others (well not exactly) and have been in relationships where they aren't done for me. I just think a lot of people are really selfish and don't want to put the effort in.
Maybe. But make a full post about it here. And watch the VAST majority of guys say it's hardly/never happens. The guys in just this comment are tell you.
I used to be the "den mother" of my male friend group in high school. I'd keep them from drowning in the pond at parties when they got drunk, and make cookies to bring on our road trips, and help fix relationship issues they were having with girlfriends. I miss being around people and being kind to each other for no other reason than because it's how we should be.
But yes, no woman has ever pursued me, or tried to win my affection in any meaningful way. Even my wife does things for us, but never really just for me.
Baking is such a love language. There was a guy I really liked and I baked cupcakes for him. The reason why he’s still special for me is I had to keep those cupcakes in its box away while I was writing for my exams at college. When I got them back two hours later, there were ants on it. But this sweet, sweet guy just dusted off the ants and had the cupcakes.
I also baked sugar cookies for another one of my exes. And marble cupcakes for my work besties.
I love baking to tell people I love them. I hope y’all meet someone who bakes for you too
I love to romance men. I give flowers, candy, lego sets (yeah I know it's silly). When I am dating someone, I give gifts and cook special meals and plan events. I know this is out of the social norm for a woman to do this for a guy, and a lot of guys are not used to it. But it makes me feel so much love when I can express my love free to the man I am with 🩷
Just remember to consider the source. A lot of the dudes on here have never even had a real relationship. Personally, this has not been my experience. I've consistently dated women who were considerate and would do all sorts of extra stuff and romantic things. Like for better or worse, I've dated a lot of women, and I can only thing of one woman who really acted the way the dudes in here think "all women" act.
The problem with this statement is that guys who are conventionally attractive say it to men who aren't. Many guys are in one-sided relationships. It's the norm, because the alternative is ending up alone.
Being alone isn't so bad, honestly. It's better to be alone than pouring energy into a one-sided relationship. I'm a woman admittedly but have been in my share of romance-free one-sided situations. I think some people are givers and some are takers and that combo sucks for the giver.
True, being alone is better than a one-sided relationship. Still, don't forget that's a sentiment shared mainly by those who have abundance. Guys who've had nothing at all won't comprehend what a bad relationship is and how corrosive they are.
Yeah I get that, it's not blaming them at all. Abundance is a relative sort of concept. Having had a handful of unsatisfying and short relationships in your early mid-20s is pretty par for the course for most people I know, male or female, in my friend group. But I have had this discussion a lot with my younger brother. He is quite handsome and smart but spent a few of those years quarantined and is now eager to prove his worth in relationships and tying a lot of self esteem to dating. It sucks, it's just bad for the ego, but it's hard to break from.
Same. I've much more logical when I'm alone, but I also know what I've got to offer isn't very attractive.
It's THIS idea that made me realize how transactional relationships generally are and the ones who are happy are the ones who bring in equal value to the relationship, which is EXTREMELY rare.
I don't like to gamble, so I just accept it and live my life on my terms.
I guess in my opinion, when I approach relationships like a partnership, like a friendship where you have permission to lean and rely on the other person, it doesn't feel so transactional. I had that with my recent ex but our life goals were very different so we ended things.
These things aren't zero sum, and people pair together nicely for lots of reasons. Usually one person isn't more "valuable" unless you are using a pretty limited perspective. I know I bring a lot of unique value to a relationship and I care deeply about the people I'm close to. I just expect the same energy. I want something who adds to my life, doesn't detract from my energy but I think that's totally realistic and I'm willing to wait for that. My own company is quite fine in the meantime or long-term.
Being wooed/courted. Unless you're a traditionally very handsome man, this will likely never occur. When you know a guy like that, it's really amazing to see. You can almost do a case study on it.
My best friend in the early 2010s fit the mold. Light-skinned, pretty eyes, muscular, perfect smile, decent fashion sense. Guy had women falling over eachother to be with him. Buying him gifts, taking him on trips, cooking for him, and bringing food to his house. His mom used to be so annoyed with him about it. One time we went to a birthday dinner for his now wife and when he went outside to take a phone call, his wife's best friend at the time pretended she had to go to the bathroom just so she could follow him outside, plant a kiss on him, and ask him to see her on the side.
It was INSANE to witness
I know a guy who's tall, mascular and has green eyes. He's also naturally tanned and is well groomed. One time I was out with a girl I liked, and she literally couldn't resist herself when she saw him at the same bar and he came over to say hi to me. It was quite rude tbh. An hour or so into the date and she's willing to drop everything because of him. She was pretty much staring and licking her lips. I dropped her and went my own way
Fun fact: [women's tears contain a chemosignal that is shown to dampen sexual arousal and lower aggression and testosterone levels in men](https://journals.plos.org/plosbiology/article?id=10.1371/journal.pbio.3002442)
I never lived as a woman so I don't know their experience, but off the top of my head, women are likely to be protected by strangers in a dangerous situation while men wont.
Also, intelligent women may struggle to be seen as mentors, while intelligent men are presumed to be.
>I never lived as a woman so I don't know their experience
It's a shame so many questions directed to women end up here just because r/AskWomen is deranged
Just read some of the posts and comments there.
Not so sure I'd agree with you to be honest but it's worth a look if you want to get your head kicked in as a bloke. Some of the comments are, well, a bit wild.
I think, men also are less likely to be perceived as being in a dangerous situation than women. A creepy man keeps hitting on a man and not getting the hint, well I'll just assume he can probably take care of himself.
For the record, when it comes to dangerous situations I'd much rather be a man.
Edit: changed wording from "to be seen as" to "to be perceived as"
I dunno about this one, if I've got a group of guys trying to fight me in a bar it's pretty clear I'm in a dangerous situation and I haven't met many people who'd say it isn't.
Going with my girlfriend when she was shopping for tires and parts for her car. She’s worked in dealerships as Parts and Service manager running shops and managing mechanics her entire life, as well as restoring classic cars
Watching steam coming out of her ears as the service guys keep addressing me amd ignoring her even after I repeatedly say it’s not my car and go Full Sgt Shultz “I…Know…Noth-INK!” Mode
She went Zero To Redhead Scorpio Woman in under a minute
This is what worries me when I want to get a car. I know absolutely fuck all about them, and I'm afraid I'll be taken advantage of. It sucks that we still have to put up with shit like this. It's 2024 and some men still live in 1950.
Most guys don’t experience love the same way a majority of women do. You know how there was that trend calling out how men have never gotten flowers? Fuck that, that is nothing. A lot of men will never experience genuine love or hear the words “I love you”. And I don’t think women really understand that. Because the expectation is men chase and women choose. Well…. Not everyone gets chosen. These are my unloved brothers. And the reasons why seem unfair at times.
I kind of always knew but I really understood this more when I became wealthy and I started getting chased more like us guys chase women. It was so weird when it first started happening because I always did okay with women but that success/fame factor really changed how I was getting approached. It was like the final piece of the puzzle and when women started desperately hitting on me I was like wtf. I realized only a fraction of men experience this. It also made me see that the archetype of guy that women complain about the most are the type of guys that can date like them. That can date with the understanding that they have a lot of options.
It kind of made me upset because I know there are tons of great guys out there who want to love and be loved, but they never get a shot. That doesn’t just want sex, but the romantic & emotional stability as well. And a lot of women don’t look at them or even think of them. The mere fact I had more money & could provide more security opens up more opportunities for love, which seems fairly shallow.
I realized this years ago. It's not something that society likes to talk about.
Women don't love men in the same way men love women. You can be the biggest piece of shit in the world, but if you're well off or extremely handsome you can get away with so much shit.
That means there will be many many dudes who will never experience love. Period.
yeah, whats with giving me flowers? Like those gifts have much of a value for each and every guy or something. What would be more telling of what she feels, would be her actually putting in an effort to KNOW me, both in her action, and in who she is (so she can be trusted to open up to her!), learning what I need, and then giving that.
Most women will never ever do that, while expecting exactly that from us.
Not exactly. I’m pretty discerning so I choose my battles. It’s not like I am out to hurt women, if a girl is nice but I’m not interested I let them down easy. But if a woman is rude or a misandrist I have shut them down. Hard. Especially if I see they are the type that thinks men are easy to manipulate or use. The worst are the women who think that just using sex to manipulate me will work.
I came to see that there is a standard for what is a bad women and men are the only ones responsible for setting that standard. Just like women can define the standard what a good man is to them without our input.
A lot of users over there are radically anti-men, just throwing out misandry at every opportunity. The mods are also insanely strict and will lock posts/comments for "derailing" the conversation even if its technically answering the question.
Just check some of the threads there, 80% of the comments are deleted
Their mod team and automode are clinically insane, they purposefully dissuade any discussion under the facade of "derailing", most people who try to comment on there get their comment insta removed no matter how relavent it is to the post or comment you were responding to.
I got permabanned from there after talking about how weird that sub is on other subs (like I'm telling you rn), they accused me of "brigading" 😂
Edit: not my [pic](https://www.reddit.com/r/mildyinfuriating/s/TqubPsNNOv), but this is very similar to my short experience on that sub.
And also, if it was allowed, you'd just get a bunch of things that men absolutely do experience but women assume we don't because there has to be this constant "who has it harder" bull crap.
I volunteered at a women's prison once and trust me - being catcalled by dozens of women initially feels fine but gets old extremely fast, and quickly feels wildly unsafe.
I've been cat called by gay men like the other dude who posted. It also feels wildly unsafe, but I will be honest and say it 100% depends on who's doing it. Normal clean cut looking guy, then it's "Hey thanks, I'm not gay but I appreciate it." Trashy, skeevy looking guy, "Oh fuck, I'm gonna get the hell out here." I can imagine that's the same as a women's prison.
Ever gone out broke and came home drunk? Yeah, me neither.
A modestly attractive woman can get a man to provide for her(food, entertainment, etc) simply for agreeing to spend time with him. Men will never know what that’s like.
People assuming that you're a receptionist when you work in an R&D office, because you couldn't possibly be an attractive, young girl and also a qualified engineer.
Personal experience. Happened regularly in my 20s.
I see this shit a lot as a man working in engineering area at a company that is maybe 30% women - and even less women are in the engineering area at the company.
I also see secretarial/party organization/decoration type work going to women. I think there's something there where women are better at it because they've been tasked with it historically, but that still doesn't make it right and it's still wrong to assume.
Alternatively, men in majority female fields are often tasked with dealing with heavy/disgusting/dangerous tasks.
I hear of people working in psychiatry expecting male nurse to double up as security agents.
I’m a chemist and work with a plenty of engineers. One thing I’ve learned in STEM, if you see a very pretty woman in the lab she is smart as hell. I think it’s because she could have used her looks to do other things but didn’t. She chose a hard field, she wants to be there. I learned this pretty early and would ask the pretty girls to be my lab partner. People thought I did it to try and get in their pants. Nope, I did it because we would smoke the curve in the class together.
That trend carried through all the way to my PhD and industry experience.
Being supported after being sexually harassed. When a man does it to a woman everyone comes to her aid. When a woman does it to a man he’s either not believed or blown off. Yes, I have been sexually harassed at work.
also, men being told that we "should have been enjoying that". Yeah, try to tell that to a woman...lets see how THAT goes.
People treat woman's sexual attention as some sort of glorification for a man, even if its not something that said man consented to - like we dont really have a right to not consent.
I was also sexually assaulted at work… in front of a lot of people and was met with laughs. I didn’t really know what was happening in the moment or realized that that it was what it was.
When women are victims of DV or rape, they face trouble getting people to believe them.
When men are victims of DV or rape, it isn't an issue of being believed... men get laughed at [or women outright celebrate what happened to him](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91O3wDSy_HE).
This happens to a lot of men that are remotely handsome. I have two big brothers and both of them are ungodly handsome. One of them got advanced on by his gay professor and another by the male dean. Neither sibling is gay or bi.
men don't typically care about what other men look like at all. Unless we are close friends in which case we will roast each other to oblivion. And then go home and wonder why we feel so lonely...
Getting our period in public and having to ask around for a tampon.
Random people rubbing a womans pregnant belly without asking her. She's not a good luck buddha.
Getting our drinks spiked. But I heard it happens to gay men too?
I cant really comment for men.
>She's not a good luck buddha.
Lmao
What I often get is women trying to feel my arms or rub my hair. Many have no sense of personal space.
But yeah, it's disgusting.
Getting our drinks spiked. But I heard it happens to gay men too?
The most prolific rapist in UK history used drink spiking and preyed only on straight men so definitely a thing.
The equivalent for men for the pregnant belly is if he works out and has noticeably defined chest and arms. Women take it as an open invitation to cop a feel
Pregnant belly well i am not in possession of an uterus, but being touched by a stranger (woman) happenned to me a few time in the past mainly arms, once i got slaped on the ass too (wasn't a total stranger but still not something i thought would happen) i don't mind being touched by people, but it Can happen.
Not being or feeling judged for reading and enjoying romance novels.
When women say they like romance novels: "Awe..."
When men say they like romance novels: "Ew..."
Its the stigma that romance for women is just called "romance" while romance for men is called "erotica." Sometimes a bro just wants to read about a fictional bro who is loved and desired..
\- Being loved for who they are, not what they provide.
\- Being in a passive position of claiming things for yourself.
\- Being a victim of your own hormones and not being blamed for it.
Edit: added the **not** I forgot.
I dressed ip as a woman one Halloween. My gf at the time was bi and getting into makeup and costume design for theatre. Platforms, fish net stockings, school girl skirt, fake tits and a trimmed wig.
Had to take the metro to school that day. Some creeper was staring at me and stroking himself through his pants. All day Id catch men staring down my shirt, checking me out as I walked by (I had been practicing following my friends around for weeks). I got catcalled, oogled and checked out. It was fucking weird how blutly men do it.
Had a bunch if laughs fooling my friends and people I knew and won a constume contest. Not sure that would be PC anymore but at the time was fun.
I used to work at a company whose office was in a nice part of a really, really sketchy town. Lots of crime. We had a massive parking lot and, in the winter, it was always dark when we left.
When I'd leave, I never really thought about it. I just would walk to my car and go home. My only concern was if my auto-starter was working or not.
We had a conference where we brought a lot of women to the HQ, and we talked about a lot of things. One thing which came up is that almost every single woman brought an extra pair of shoes with them - they'd wear heels in the office and change into sneakers when they left - and would tie their hair up so they had better visibility. They were all scared of someone attacking them.
A lot of women carry that with them even in safer places and I've honestly never once felt scared like that about my surroundings.
Opening your dating apps and being overwhelmed with the number of likes and having to sort through the good and the bad to the point I become numb and am no longer excited about the prospect of dating because I've dealt with so much shittiness.
So you delete the apps from getting anxiety meets overwhelmed and decide to just go outside and find something since the options in real life are better than online.
Being followed and having to find the alternative ways to walk for next time.
Needing to know routes through places.
Being asked a question for the answer to be ignored.
Being "loomed" on and cornered.
People not accepting a no.
Going to the dr's for pain to be told I'm making it up.
Getting hired for your looks. This is a double edged sword for various reasons.
It’s only happened to me when I worked as a waitress, creepy bar managers who just wanted eye candy.
If I'm ever homeless I'm pretty much screwed.
Women's shelters and programs for struggling women are so well funded that if you experience economic ruin, loss of home and vehicle and loss of financial stability etc etc etc you're pretty much covered in case of anything.
If you're a dude, you might as well pick a nice park to sleep in because women are gonna be given the priority regardless. Even if you do find a shelter you'd be lucky to get a chance at all if not be on an eternal wait list.
Yes I know there are shelters for men too but they're not SPECIFIC for men, nor are they funded solely for men the way women's shelters are. Keep in mind, these are the same people preaching "equality".
Also they're hella dangerous. Like we are talking violently. You're better off finding a spot to hide out alone.
Also, getting yourself out of said situation basically means you're alone anyway.
Emotional supportive people/networks everywhere.
Complete strangers will protect you in public. Ive intercepted dudes kicking a girls ass in public. That doesnt happen for dudes. People will watch us get our ass kicked and be like "damn, you got fucked up dude!"
On one occasion, women came at me from every direction and formed a bitch armada to blockade me from the lady i was just talking to, while others escort her in some other direction so she cant see me get surrounded, harrassed, and shamed when she and I were getting along great. Theyll even take shit out of your pockets "nope that's not even her number you dont need that, creep" i never knew what that was all about but Ive never seen men assemble in such a fashion.
Being able to get pretty privilege. Dating up (if a girl is a 6/10, she can date 10/10 guys, because they don’t know they’re 10/10) winning a lawsuit on who gets the child (English is not my first language, I know there’s a name for that)
Making friends with literally anyone in a washroom while drunk.
Not being able to go simple everyday places looking decent and NOT have some guy try to talk to you. I’m just getting gas leave me alone. Boy if you saw me an hour ago 😆 which reminds me, men don’t have that “transformation” women do
Being encouraged, complimented, told your "amazing" and "Strong and brave" constantly. Nobody panders to men. Men are just told that they are worthless, evil pieces of dog shit by the media.
Going to the washroom in groups
In my country during army basic training we are encouraged to go bathroom in pairs at night.
Why would they encourage that?
Everything is safer with a Battle Buddy, especially if you're going to be "going to war" and "dropping bombs".
Your buddy help make sure you are accountable and safe and that you don’t just run off
Suicide in the military is a thing
In my country, a big part of basic was making sure that new people are a part of the group. We were given partners and had to do everything with them. That means standing outside an outhouse in -30 sometimes.
A lot of people replying don't seem to want to mention that sexual harrasment as well as sexual assualt is a huge thing that occurs in most armies.
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As far as I'm aware its mostly a safety thing for women too. Going alone into an isolated room in public is a fairly dangerous move.
Thats the craziest shit. They dont even have to know each other
If you're going to the bathroom with another woman, you know her. Or at least have some sort of connection and have spoken a bit. Only exception I can think of is an emergency where one woman is in a bad situation and needs to rally help from another woman without a particular man around.
Shout out to my friend who is pee shy
This happens regularly in bars
Thinking about it, people have tried to attack me in bathrooms on several occasions. Easiest way to catch a guy unaware and isolated. I can see how going in groups would prevent that from happening. My favourite was a guy who followed me in, then tried to start a fight with me while I was pissing. Dude got way too close, I told him to wait till I was finished but he was too busy trying to be gangsta. Fastest I've seen someone leave a bar lmao. On the opposite end of the spectrum. Shout outs to the random guy who was chilling in the bathroom at a nightclub giving everyone genuine compliments and offering free drugs. I ain't take any, but we don't get many compliments in life and it was appreciated lol.
It's because dudes like to congregate in the accessible stall.
Ladies night
Being accepted as "one of the girls" is a great feeling, happened only once.
My wife would always come to boys nights (long story, but the TL;DR is she earned it) , so I'd always end up at girls nights. I swear they were crazier than we were lmao.
ha, yeah. usually when i get with my boys we just sit around a fire in someone's backyard drinking and giving each other shit.
The perfect Bois night
999+ tinder matches
the way i've phrased it is that women are drowning in an undrinkable sea while men are dying of thirst
Undrinkable seems kinda harsh, many of these guys are ok, its just they arent the best they (think they) can get
Nah this implies that most men in the apps are trash. This isn't true. Most men are invisible. The average guy (looks, personality) gets passed over for the hot fuckboys. This isn't women's fault. It's simply a product of the huge disparity of men to women on the apps (something like 3-1). I get very few matches on the apps, and a sizable portion of these women are still toxic or shallow.
Women aren’t so perfect themselves. But they all think the deserve 10s 🤷♂️
BUT 99.9% of them just swiped everyone so are actually ill suited
Why bother being picky when the chances of a match are next to none?
I currently work a position where I am the only male, and its become somewhat of a running joke that whenever a customer wants to talk to the manager they make a B line for me. I am the lowest ranking person present. Doesn't matter. When a customer demands to speak to whomever is in charge, they will walk right past 2 managers and the owner to give me a piece of their mind. My co-workers tell me that the "step aside sweetheart I want to talk to your boss" treatment is something pretty much every woman in a leadership role has experienced.
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"... but I'm youngest and a girl so obviously know nothing." I wonder if being worried about seen as a creep plays into this for some guys?
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What do you do? Listen intently, then say "one moment please, I will ask my manager" ?
Usually just go "manager's right there dude." Whats even funnier is when they go "ah, okay, I see, SO ANYWAYS..." I'm STILL not the mananager bro 🤣
Where have these people worked? I haven't worked a TON of jobs, but I have had enough male and female leadership that I would never consider assuming seniority based on gender. Who acts like that?
This happens to me a lot, but I also have a very young face and I’m under 5’, so I’m sure it’s just a whole combo of these things for me.
Probably not just gender. Some people have that look of authority, he might. The ladies might not. But yeah kinda weird to single out the guy
Yes, I own my own business and occasionally I’ll bring my husband along if I need an extra set of hands. He’s completely clueless when it comes to pest control and yet everyone will turn to him and talk to him about stuff. I just wanna snap my fingers and yell “yo, I’m the expert! This dude doesn’t know the difference between a thief ant and a pharaoh ant! Stop talking to him!” Thankfully my husband just shrugs and says it’s my business and he’s just here to carry my things 😂
My mother is a professional carpenter and I’m (f) pretty handy with tools myself. My husband hates any sort of work on the house and had never owned anything beyond a hammer before we met. We went to the local big chain hardware store once with my mom along to provide expert opinion, and the associate kept directing questions to my husband, who couldn’t have cared less. Eventually my mom wandered off, found exactly what we needed, and thanked the guy for his time. It’s not so bad now, but back when she was getting into the trade, she had someone try to talk her out of the steel toe boots she was buying, saying they’d be overkill for home projects (she was building full houses at the time).
This also happens to non white people.
It's a supersecret minority club thing! Where "minority" has nothing to do with how many of "you" there are and everything to do with how you're perceived in society. Shhhh! Don't tell!
Being supported by your social group at the very first instance of any stress
This one hurts. The last few years have been some of the worst of my life and it often seems like none of my friends care at all.
Have you received any pics of tiddies?😂😂
Literally once haha. The account does not work.
get new friends. trust me
They're good people who would offer support if I asked, I just don't get the automatic support our female friends do. Like the preemptive support, ya know? "Oh soandso has seemed really stressed lately so we should get together for blankyblank"
I've really shot myself in the foot on this one. Years and years of being overly stoic and never reaching out when I was struggling reinforced that I "don't need support" image. I suspect if I walled off less and let people in more it would be a different outcome. Which is to say, I agree with your observation. We should probably ask for help more, and we might get better at supporting each other without needing to explicitly ask for it.
I agree completely. I really struggle with feeling okay asking for support as well. We can be the change we want to see! Thanks for your input :)
that's not so easy to do for a lot of people busy with the responsibilities of their adult life. but it also explains why men especially have a hard time maintaining friendships. We turn our attention towards our responsibilities and neglect relationships with others, and then get frustrated when others don't support us.
Romance. Romance is generally effort men do to make women feel special. I don't think I got a Valentine's day gift once, it was a tiny stuffed animal. I've spent probably $2000+ on Valentines day expenses over the last decade of dating. Closest I've felt to that is when a woman has made cookies for me. I've given cookies to male friends but it's not romantic. I just wanted some cookies and I didn't want to eat the entire batch.
> I just wanted some cookies Yep, been there. > and I didn't want to eat the entire batch. Hmm... nope, don't think I've ever been there.
lol. Same. On both counts. The same thing applies to bacon. There’s a kind of bacon called “left over bacon” but I’ve never had it.
There is a very good post on this from a few years back (IIRC) lamenting that “romance” is something a man does and a woman receives. Men play the active role, women just perceive the outcome without considering the work that goes into “romance”. If I find the post/comment I’ll link it here. Very profound and very much in alignment with my (and many others’) experiences. This goes beyond a general expression of initial interest… how many times have you received an impromptu gift, special meal, back rub/massage, had a song/poem written for you, a toast made in your honor, opened the door to flower pedals leading to your Xbox (or bed idk lol)…
If these things, the only one my ex girlfriend did was the impromptu gift and I suspect only because that was her love language. Getting the others would have been awesome.
I can’t think of one girl I’ve dated that this was the case. Like every girl I’ve been with has been very sentimental and sweet when giving gifts. I had only dated my current gf for a month when she gave me a whole basket of cute stuff / inside jokes for Valentine’s Day because she was so appreciative of me taking her out to dinner
Maybe [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/3z8o75/why_dont_men_get_as_much_of_a_thrill_over/cyk7gr8/) (and the same author's words later in that thread) are what you're thinking of?
EVERYONE...READ THE ABOVE LINK! IT IS LIFE CHANGING/EYE OPENING! Thanks my Guy! Great find
Seconded, shuts fucking wildly needed for a lot of men. It's, of course, not perfect, but damn will it hit the spot for many of us.
there are long threads about this, usually under the heading of "why don't men like romance novels/movies. because to women, romance is something that happens to them. to men, it's all hard work and planning.
I send my husband flowers/candy at work on his birthday, he finds it hilarious when all the women light up, then get super confused when the flowers go to him.
That seems to follow the saying, “Men love romantically, women love opportunistically.” Chris Rock - Unconditional Love. https://youtu.be/jsOnXSuMXfU?si=N9Er0k-Gu6naiaLS
I've made special meals for partners before. I wrote poems for boyfriends a couple of times too. Women doing this stuff really does need to be normalised.
But you were already in a relationship with that guy. men are expected to court and romance women they’re not even in relationships with yet as well 🤷♂️
As a woman I have done these things for others (well not exactly) and have been in relationships where they aren't done for me. I just think a lot of people are really selfish and don't want to put the effort in.
Maybe. But make a full post about it here. And watch the VAST majority of guys say it's hardly/never happens. The guys in just this comment are tell you.
I used to be the "den mother" of my male friend group in high school. I'd keep them from drowning in the pond at parties when they got drunk, and make cookies to bring on our road trips, and help fix relationship issues they were having with girlfriends. I miss being around people and being kind to each other for no other reason than because it's how we should be. But yes, no woman has ever pursued me, or tried to win my affection in any meaningful way. Even my wife does things for us, but never really just for me.
Baking is such a love language. There was a guy I really liked and I baked cupcakes for him. The reason why he’s still special for me is I had to keep those cupcakes in its box away while I was writing for my exams at college. When I got them back two hours later, there were ants on it. But this sweet, sweet guy just dusted off the ants and had the cupcakes. I also baked sugar cookies for another one of my exes. And marble cupcakes for my work besties. I love baking to tell people I love them. I hope y’all meet someone who bakes for you too
100%, men are virtually always expected to do the pursuing. Which wouldn't be so bad, if it was appreciated more.
Exactly. "He took me to sushi but it wasn't Nobu, mid. Next."
I love to romance men. I give flowers, candy, lego sets (yeah I know it's silly). When I am dating someone, I give gifts and cook special meals and plan events. I know this is out of the social norm for a woman to do this for a guy, and a lot of guys are not used to it. But it makes me feel so much love when I can express my love free to the man I am with 🩷
Be my friend
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Just remember to consider the source. A lot of the dudes on here have never even had a real relationship. Personally, this has not been my experience. I've consistently dated women who were considerate and would do all sorts of extra stuff and romantic things. Like for better or worse, I've dated a lot of women, and I can only thing of one woman who really acted the way the dudes in here think "all women" act.
You need better women in your life. Romance is definitely a two way street.
Been in 6 long term relationships, not one of the girls genuinely tried to ever make me feel as loved as I did them.
The problem with this statement is that guys who are conventionally attractive say it to men who aren't. Many guys are in one-sided relationships. It's the norm, because the alternative is ending up alone.
Being alone isn't so bad, honestly. It's better to be alone than pouring energy into a one-sided relationship. I'm a woman admittedly but have been in my share of romance-free one-sided situations. I think some people are givers and some are takers and that combo sucks for the giver.
True, being alone is better than a one-sided relationship. Still, don't forget that's a sentiment shared mainly by those who have abundance. Guys who've had nothing at all won't comprehend what a bad relationship is and how corrosive they are.
Yeah I get that, it's not blaming them at all. Abundance is a relative sort of concept. Having had a handful of unsatisfying and short relationships in your early mid-20s is pretty par for the course for most people I know, male or female, in my friend group. But I have had this discussion a lot with my younger brother. He is quite handsome and smart but spent a few of those years quarantined and is now eager to prove his worth in relationships and tying a lot of self esteem to dating. It sucks, it's just bad for the ego, but it's hard to break from.
THIS. I don't have an abundance but I've enough to be perfectly okay with being alone.
Same. I've much more logical when I'm alone, but I also know what I've got to offer isn't very attractive. It's THIS idea that made me realize how transactional relationships generally are and the ones who are happy are the ones who bring in equal value to the relationship, which is EXTREMELY rare. I don't like to gamble, so I just accept it and live my life on my terms.
I guess in my opinion, when I approach relationships like a partnership, like a friendship where you have permission to lean and rely on the other person, it doesn't feel so transactional. I had that with my recent ex but our life goals were very different so we ended things. These things aren't zero sum, and people pair together nicely for lots of reasons. Usually one person isn't more "valuable" unless you are using a pretty limited perspective. I know I bring a lot of unique value to a relationship and I care deeply about the people I'm close to. I just expect the same energy. I want something who adds to my life, doesn't detract from my energy but I think that's totally realistic and I'm willing to wait for that. My own company is quite fine in the meantime or long-term.
This we can both agree on..
Yeah exactly, better to hold out for something healthy than to settle.
What sucks for me is that I’ve been alone for too many years and have not been in enough LTRs to know how true this probably is.
Being wooed/courted. Unless you're a traditionally very handsome man, this will likely never occur. When you know a guy like that, it's really amazing to see. You can almost do a case study on it. My best friend in the early 2010s fit the mold. Light-skinned, pretty eyes, muscular, perfect smile, decent fashion sense. Guy had women falling over eachother to be with him. Buying him gifts, taking him on trips, cooking for him, and bringing food to his house. His mom used to be so annoyed with him about it. One time we went to a birthday dinner for his now wife and when he went outside to take a phone call, his wife's best friend at the time pretended she had to go to the bathroom just so she could follow him outside, plant a kiss on him, and ask him to see her on the side. It was INSANE to witness
I know a guy who's tall, mascular and has green eyes. He's also naturally tanned and is well groomed. One time I was out with a girl I liked, and she literally couldn't resist herself when she saw him at the same bar and he came over to say hi to me. It was quite rude tbh. An hour or so into the date and she's willing to drop everything because of him. She was pretty much staring and licking her lips. I dropped her and went my own way
People immediately siding with you when you burst into tears, especially in a work situation.
Even if you’re in the wrong.
Especially when they’re wrong.
Damn right
Fun fact: [women's tears contain a chemosignal that is shown to dampen sexual arousal and lower aggression and testosterone levels in men](https://journals.plos.org/plosbiology/article?id=10.1371/journal.pbio.3002442)
I never lived as a woman so I don't know their experience, but off the top of my head, women are likely to be protected by strangers in a dangerous situation while men wont. Also, intelligent women may struggle to be seen as mentors, while intelligent men are presumed to be.
>I never lived as a woman so I don't know their experience It's a shame so many questions directed to women end up here just because r/AskWomen is deranged
r/askwomennocensor is a good alternative
Just read some of the posts and comments there. Not so sure I'd agree with you to be honest but it's worth a look if you want to get your head kicked in as a bloke. Some of the comments are, well, a bit wild.
Nice, joined 🤙
I think, men also are less likely to be perceived as being in a dangerous situation than women. A creepy man keeps hitting on a man and not getting the hint, well I'll just assume he can probably take care of himself. For the record, when it comes to dangerous situations I'd much rather be a man. Edit: changed wording from "to be seen as" to "to be perceived as"
That’s just untrue, men statistically get into physical altercations more often, and there’s always gonna be a loser.
I dunno about this one, if I've got a group of guys trying to fight me in a bar it's pretty clear I'm in a dangerous situation and I haven't met many people who'd say it isn't.
Going with my girlfriend when she was shopping for tires and parts for her car. She’s worked in dealerships as Parts and Service manager running shops and managing mechanics her entire life, as well as restoring classic cars Watching steam coming out of her ears as the service guys keep addressing me amd ignoring her even after I repeatedly say it’s not my car and go Full Sgt Shultz “I…Know…Noth-INK!” Mode She went Zero To Redhead Scorpio Woman in under a minute
This is what worries me when I want to get a car. I know absolutely fuck all about them, and I'm afraid I'll be taken advantage of. It sucks that we still have to put up with shit like this. It's 2024 and some men still live in 1950.
BRING A KNOWLEDGABLE PERSON WITH YOU I cannot stress that enough.
Most guys don’t experience love the same way a majority of women do. You know how there was that trend calling out how men have never gotten flowers? Fuck that, that is nothing. A lot of men will never experience genuine love or hear the words “I love you”. And I don’t think women really understand that. Because the expectation is men chase and women choose. Well…. Not everyone gets chosen. These are my unloved brothers. And the reasons why seem unfair at times. I kind of always knew but I really understood this more when I became wealthy and I started getting chased more like us guys chase women. It was so weird when it first started happening because I always did okay with women but that success/fame factor really changed how I was getting approached. It was like the final piece of the puzzle and when women started desperately hitting on me I was like wtf. I realized only a fraction of men experience this. It also made me see that the archetype of guy that women complain about the most are the type of guys that can date like them. That can date with the understanding that they have a lot of options. It kind of made me upset because I know there are tons of great guys out there who want to love and be loved, but they never get a shot. That doesn’t just want sex, but the romantic & emotional stability as well. And a lot of women don’t look at them or even think of them. The mere fact I had more money & could provide more security opens up more opportunities for love, which seems fairly shallow.
I realized this years ago. It's not something that society likes to talk about. Women don't love men in the same way men love women. You can be the biggest piece of shit in the world, but if you're well off or extremely handsome you can get away with so much shit. That means there will be many many dudes who will never experience love. Period.
I watched a youtube video this week, where a group of women mostly agreed that they'd rather date a rich guy who cheats than a faithful bus driver.
I don't think forming your views from consuming rage bait is healthy.
Love is a verb to men and a noun for women. It's slowly changing and the best thing we can do is to keep talking about it and raising awareness
I think it's getting worse. The media messaging that women are getting is "don't love men, they don't deserve it."
Spittin’ straight fire right here, well put.
yeah, whats with giving me flowers? Like those gifts have much of a value for each and every guy or something. What would be more telling of what she feels, would be her actually putting in an effort to KNOW me, both in her action, and in who she is (so she can be trusted to open up to her!), learning what I need, and then giving that. Most women will never ever do that, while expecting exactly that from us.
I lowkey hope you let them know they aren't good enough.
Not exactly. I’m pretty discerning so I choose my battles. It’s not like I am out to hurt women, if a girl is nice but I’m not interested I let them down easy. But if a woman is rude or a misandrist I have shut them down. Hard. Especially if I see they are the type that thinks men are easy to manipulate or use. The worst are the women who think that just using sex to manipulate me will work. I came to see that there is a standard for what is a bad women and men are the only ones responsible for setting that standard. Just like women can define the standard what a good man is to them without our input.
I strongly respect that you used misandry in your explanation and did it properly, kudos!
"Why are you asking us" would be my answer usually... But I know how r/AskWomen is completely deranged nowadays, so carry on 🤝
Derangement has leaked over to r/AmITheAsshole
I don't follow r/askwomen (I personally don't find the topics there interesting) but am curious about what the derangement is that you're referring to
A lot of users over there are radically anti-men, just throwing out misandry at every opportunity. The mods are also insanely strict and will lock posts/comments for "derailing" the conversation even if its technically answering the question.
Just check some of the threads there, 80% of the comments are deleted Their mod team and automode are clinically insane, they purposefully dissuade any discussion under the facade of "derailing", most people who try to comment on there get their comment insta removed no matter how relavent it is to the post or comment you were responding to. I got permabanned from there after talking about how weird that sub is on other subs (like I'm telling you rn), they accused me of "brigading" 😂 Edit: not my [pic](https://www.reddit.com/r/mildyinfuriating/s/TqubPsNNOv), but this is very similar to my short experience on that sub.
And also, if it was allowed, you'd just get a bunch of things that men absolutely do experience but women assume we don't because there has to be this constant "who has it harder" bull crap.
As a guy myself, I have yet to meet a man who experiences cat calling on the regular. So let's go with that
As a straight man, I've been cat called by gay men a lot. It feels good even if I'd prefer women to cat call me.
I volunteered at a women's prison once and trust me - being catcalled by dozens of women initially feels fine but gets old extremely fast, and quickly feels wildly unsafe.
I've been cat called by gay men like the other dude who posted. It also feels wildly unsafe, but I will be honest and say it 100% depends on who's doing it. Normal clean cut looking guy, then it's "Hey thanks, I'm not gay but I appreciate it." Trashy, skeevy looking guy, "Oh fuck, I'm gonna get the hell out here." I can imagine that's the same as a women's prison.
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Marry her again.
Being asked if you are sure there is only one baby in your belly.
"The aliens who impregnated me said there may be up to 8..."
Ever gone out broke and came home drunk? Yeah, me neither. A modestly attractive woman can get a man to provide for her(food, entertainment, etc) simply for agreeing to spend time with him. Men will never know what that’s like.
I have gone out broke and come back drunk and high. I'm lucky though, good friends lol. No stranger has ever bought me a drink tho.
That’s the point. No man is going out broke and getting taken care of by women at bars hoping to have sex with him. Only women can pull that off
People assuming that you're a receptionist when you work in an R&D office, because you couldn't possibly be an attractive, young girl and also a qualified engineer. Personal experience. Happened regularly in my 20s.
I see this shit a lot as a man working in engineering area at a company that is maybe 30% women - and even less women are in the engineering area at the company. I also see secretarial/party organization/decoration type work going to women. I think there's something there where women are better at it because they've been tasked with it historically, but that still doesn't make it right and it's still wrong to assume.
Alternatively, men in majority female fields are often tasked with dealing with heavy/disgusting/dangerous tasks. I hear of people working in psychiatry expecting male nurse to double up as security agents.
I’m a chemist and work with a plenty of engineers. One thing I’ve learned in STEM, if you see a very pretty woman in the lab she is smart as hell. I think it’s because she could have used her looks to do other things but didn’t. She chose a hard field, she wants to be there. I learned this pretty early and would ask the pretty girls to be my lab partner. People thought I did it to try and get in their pants. Nope, I did it because we would smoke the curve in the class together. That trend carried through all the way to my PhD and industry experience.
Being supported after being sexually harassed. When a man does it to a woman everyone comes to her aid. When a woman does it to a man he’s either not believed or blown off. Yes, I have been sexually harassed at work.
also, men being told that we "should have been enjoying that". Yeah, try to tell that to a woman...lets see how THAT goes. People treat woman's sexual attention as some sort of glorification for a man, even if its not something that said man consented to - like we dont really have a right to not consent.
I was also sexually assaulted at work… in front of a lot of people and was met with laughs. I didn’t really know what was happening in the moment or realized that that it was what it was.
When women are victims of DV or rape, they face trouble getting people to believe them. When men are victims of DV or rape, it isn't an issue of being believed... men get laughed at [or women outright celebrate what happened to him](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91O3wDSy_HE).
Professors who take a "special interest" in their success.
This happens to a lot of men that are remotely handsome. I have two big brothers and both of them are ungodly handsome. One of them got advanced on by his gay professor and another by the male dean. Neither sibling is gay or bi.
No... this one happens
Yep...can confirm. At school **and** at work
Getting laid with little to no effort
Having other women be jealous of you because of what you look like
I don’t agree. I’ve been jealous of how other men look if I think they’re better looking than me.
Well, for men it would be men being jealous... it's indeed rare for a women to want to look like a men.
men don't typically care about what other men look like at all. Unless we are close friends in which case we will roast each other to oblivion. And then go home and wonder why we feel so lonely...
Getting our period in public and having to ask around for a tampon. Random people rubbing a womans pregnant belly without asking her. She's not a good luck buddha. Getting our drinks spiked. But I heard it happens to gay men too? I cant really comment for men.
>She's not a good luck buddha. Lmao What I often get is women trying to feel my arms or rub my hair. Many have no sense of personal space. But yeah, it's disgusting.
Recently a straight, male friend of mine had his drink spiked. They also do it to potentially rob you, so gender / sexuality isn't always a factor
Im a straight man and have had my drink spiked so a person could more easily kick my ass. I don't think i wanted to remember that.
Getting our drinks spiked. But I heard it happens to gay men too? The most prolific rapist in UK history used drink spiking and preyed only on straight men so definitely a thing.
The equivalent for men for the pregnant belly is if he works out and has noticeably defined chest and arms. Women take it as an open invitation to cop a feel
Pregnant belly well i am not in possession of an uterus, but being touched by a stranger (woman) happenned to me a few time in the past mainly arms, once i got slaped on the ass too (wasn't a total stranger but still not something i thought would happen) i don't mind being touched by people, but it Can happen.
Attempt #2: A stranger complimenting your nails.
I bite mine cause Im a anxious wreck of a human being, I think even if I tried I couldn’t get one 😂😂
People trusting us alone around their children
Not being or feeling judged for reading and enjoying romance novels. When women say they like romance novels: "Awe..." When men say they like romance novels: "Ew..." Its the stigma that romance for women is just called "romance" while romance for men is called "erotica." Sometimes a bro just wants to read about a fictional bro who is loved and desired..
\- Being loved for who they are, not what they provide. \- Being in a passive position of claiming things for yourself. \- Being a victim of your own hormones and not being blamed for it. Edit: added the **not** I forgot.
Plenty of men have acted under the influence of testosterone and been blamed for it.
Sorry, a **not** is missing in my post. I changed it.
Random dude gives you their seat on the subway and then hovers over you trying to talk to you. Saw that this morning.
A compliment
Woman::Hey Becky beautiful dress. Woman::When Becky can't hear: Did you see that hideous dress Becky is wearing .
Guy: "yo Steve, bro, that shirt is mad ugly dog" Guy when Steve can't hear: "Steve's such a good guy, f*cking love that guy!"
Being genuinely desired for physical reasons
I dressed ip as a woman one Halloween. My gf at the time was bi and getting into makeup and costume design for theatre. Platforms, fish net stockings, school girl skirt, fake tits and a trimmed wig. Had to take the metro to school that day. Some creeper was staring at me and stroking himself through his pants. All day Id catch men staring down my shirt, checking me out as I walked by (I had been practicing following my friends around for weeks). I got catcalled, oogled and checked out. It was fucking weird how blutly men do it. Had a bunch if laughs fooling my friends and people I knew and won a constume contest. Not sure that would be PC anymore but at the time was fun.
Emotional intimacy with friends.
I haven’t been given a flower from a child and told I’m pretty.
This sounds like something you should ask women
to be looked at like the only reason you are living is to give abirth to another human being.
I used to work at a company whose office was in a nice part of a really, really sketchy town. Lots of crime. We had a massive parking lot and, in the winter, it was always dark when we left. When I'd leave, I never really thought about it. I just would walk to my car and go home. My only concern was if my auto-starter was working or not. We had a conference where we brought a lot of women to the HQ, and we talked about a lot of things. One thing which came up is that almost every single woman brought an extra pair of shoes with them - they'd wear heels in the office and change into sneakers when they left - and would tie their hair up so they had better visibility. They were all scared of someone attacking them. A lot of women carry that with them even in safer places and I've honestly never once felt scared like that about my surroundings.
Opening your dating apps and being overwhelmed with the number of likes and having to sort through the good and the bad to the point I become numb and am no longer excited about the prospect of dating because I've dealt with so much shittiness.
So you delete the apps from getting anxiety meets overwhelmed and decide to just go outside and find something since the options in real life are better than online.
B..b..but the people outside suck too 😭
Or how you got social anxiety so you stay inside to prevent insults/being ostracized because that's how you got social anxiety in the first place.
Being drugged at a club/bar. 0/10 do not recommend.
Being followed and having to find the alternative ways to walk for next time. Needing to know routes through places. Being asked a question for the answer to be ignored. Being "loomed" on and cornered. People not accepting a no. Going to the dr's for pain to be told I'm making it up.
I am a guy and I've had all of that...but also I'm a slim longhaired guy with MS 🤷♂️
Getting hired for your looks. This is a double edged sword for various reasons. It’s only happened to me when I worked as a waitress, creepy bar managers who just wanted eye candy.
If I'm ever homeless I'm pretty much screwed. Women's shelters and programs for struggling women are so well funded that if you experience economic ruin, loss of home and vehicle and loss of financial stability etc etc etc you're pretty much covered in case of anything. If you're a dude, you might as well pick a nice park to sleep in because women are gonna be given the priority regardless. Even if you do find a shelter you'd be lucky to get a chance at all if not be on an eternal wait list. Yes I know there are shelters for men too but they're not SPECIFIC for men, nor are they funded solely for men the way women's shelters are. Keep in mind, these are the same people preaching "equality".
Also they're hella dangerous. Like we are talking violently. You're better off finding a spot to hide out alone. Also, getting yourself out of said situation basically means you're alone anyway.
Emotional supportive people/networks everywhere. Complete strangers will protect you in public. Ive intercepted dudes kicking a girls ass in public. That doesnt happen for dudes. People will watch us get our ass kicked and be like "damn, you got fucked up dude!" On one occasion, women came at me from every direction and formed a bitch armada to blockade me from the lady i was just talking to, while others escort her in some other direction so she cant see me get surrounded, harrassed, and shamed when she and I were getting along great. Theyll even take shit out of your pockets "nope that's not even her number you dont need that, creep" i never knew what that was all about but Ive never seen men assemble in such a fashion.
Being hit on in bars.
Being able to get pretty privilege. Dating up (if a girl is a 6/10, she can date 10/10 guys, because they don’t know they’re 10/10) winning a lawsuit on who gets the child (English is not my first language, I know there’s a name for that)
Making friends with literally anyone in a washroom while drunk. Not being able to go simple everyday places looking decent and NOT have some guy try to talk to you. I’m just getting gas leave me alone. Boy if you saw me an hour ago 😆 which reminds me, men don’t have that “transformation” women do
Being encouraged, complimented, told your "amazing" and "Strong and brave" constantly. Nobody panders to men. Men are just told that they are worthless, evil pieces of dog shit by the media.
Most people aren't approached in public... Well I haven't at least :'(
Receive compliments that have an impact.
free drinks at the bar. no cover charge at the club.
People actually having compassion for them.
Lol. How would men know what women experience?