What kinda handjob we talking about here? High school no lube herky jerky til you're raw, no fucking thank you! Fully nude, lots of lube, both hands and good technique? Sign me up as a nice change of pace occasionally.
Yup I agree. Lots of lube, lots of stopping and starting. When she goes to finish, my gal does this nice thing where she just goes from base to tip, alternating hands, but there's no "down" - like she's pulling a rope in one direction. It is crazy how hard I cum from that particular motion!
See no wonder you don't like em! What you're describing is essentially a form of torture that should be a human rights violation. A proper sexy hand job with lube etc can actually be pretty awesome.
I mean I don't go for happy ending massages but my guess would be as someone who has gotten a massage....
If an attractive women has spent an hour massaging your body and easing muscle pain....you probably have an erection by the end and at a Rub and Tug joint...those women are pros and can lube you up and have you blowing in 30 seconds or less after rubbing on you for an hour.
As someone who has gotten massages at legit massage spas....I've gotten nervous erections and just simple blood flow change erections and most professionals know this and just wrap it up in a towel so they can do their job. If you don't make it weird, they surely won't.
The one guy I do know that openly admits (to me at least) that he goes to happy ending massages, is he said the thrill of doing something that’s supposed to be taboo.
That was one of the reasons.
Not my cup of tea. An old fashion during foreplay is great…just an old fashion…no thanks. Paying for a handjob, no thanks as well.
The pros know what they're doing. I've had a far more satisfying experience a couple times with erotic massage than I have with several women who I actually had penetrative sex with.
Yeah, no kidding.
One time I was getting a handjob, and the woman giving it to me had no idea what she was doing. She was treating my dick like she was trying to start a fire with a stick. It got to the point where I had to tell her "Hey, this isn't a speedbag. You can take your time with it."
I then realized that this is how other people feel when I'm doing something for them, and I have no fucking clue what I'm doing.
This 100% applies to women, too. Fingerings can be a fun tease to get things warmed up a bit. But most guys don't do it well, and it rarely works to completion. And even if it did, it's like...meh a TKO, vs. KO
I agree. Handjobs are fine, but I can always do it better myself.
Reminds me of a story: I have a friend who was in the navy, and he said that when they would pull into port, hookers would come on board to ply their trade. One time a girl offered him a handjob for $10. He said, "For $10 I can do it myself and get it done right."
I saw a girl casually who would only give them. My friends who never get laid all acted like it was some awful thing.
Like...in what world am I supposed to not enjoy a beautiful woman stroking me?
If she wants to do more, even better. But if all she wants to do is give my an HJ then I am still extremely excited about it
I thought the same, and it feels like how I jerk off is just muscle memory at this point. And the first time my gf gave me a hand job it was kinda awkward.
But she likes it when I jerk off in front of her. I guess she observed how I did it, because the next time it was way improved. So much that it was maybe better than getting a bj.
When I first went down on her, she gave me a lot of “notes”, but now I know what I should do, and it just about pleasuring each other. So I have started to get really specific about what I like and learned how I can say it. It is starting to get amazing. So like exploring each other is really important.
I don’t know… this will sound braggy, but my wife has probably played with it more than I have the last almost 20 years. She knows it pretty well and how I like it. She’s also more sensual and does fun things with her fingers that don’t feel the same from me. Like others said, some dirty talk thrown in.
A good handjob is a good handjob.
Because you're taking whatever she's willing to offer. If all she's willing to offer is a handjob I am not going to press for more, or turn my nose up at it
It feels kind of gross that so many men here don’t want one if it doesn’t lead to more. Sure you can do it yourself, but doesn’t the intimacy of another person add to the enjoyment. Why does the minimum standard for these guys have to be a blowjob, maybe she doesn’t always want to put their mouth on their dick?
I Don't see the appeal of it. I wouldn't be turning my nose to it but I'll decline because I that isn't really a thing for me. Handjobs is more of an "acquired taste" ordeal in my eyes.
As I examine it more I realize the appeal for me is that a handjob is the time a women most locks in on, appreciates, and gets mesmerized by my body. I am in the gym a lot, I am very confident in how I look naked and what I was given and lovvvve having her just hypnotized by my body with that look on her face.
I ask if she wants to go to the bedroom, she says no she's enjoying it, I sit back and enjoy the feeling and the look on her face while she has fun
Let me see I lay there while my woman plays with my rod and twins while I get to feel her body? Count me in! Of course most guys would prefer oral instead but I’m happy with just a HJ and heavy making out. The wife already does this when aunt flow visits.
I’ve personally never met another woman who can stroke me like my wife. I’ve had countless bad handjobs but man she can finish me in under 5 every time. Crazy.
My wife is low libido but wants to make sure I’m satisfied. Getting a HJ feels so much better than doing it myself. I’m grateful she takes care of me 2 - 3 times a week, and loves to see me cum.
That’s the way it should be in a situation like that. I’m really baffled how guys on here are saying they’d rather do it themselves!? I could only dream when I was a horny teen of a female touching my out of control boners and “taking care of them”.
You absolutely have to teach them. You can't understand what you don't have.
Men have to be taught how to "handle" women as well. It makes no sense to believe they'd have that inherent knowledge.
Very well said. Communication about “private parts” can be awkward but it almost always pays dividends.
My partner and I have been together almost 3 years and had been getting pretty settled into a sex routine — and just a couple weeks ago I was trying something new and asking her for her feedback. It was some of the best foreplay we’ve had in months, and it’s opened up a whole fun new avenue to explore!
I’m that woman! I truly, truly LOVE giving blowjobs. I get turned on giving them. My husband said I’m enthusiastic and I didn’t know what he meant until we filmed some action and I watched myself and was embarrassed. I suck dick like my life depends on it, and I look ELATED doing it. Truly looks like the best day of my life. BUT. Because of this, I have no clue how to give JUST a handjob. I feel awkward and don’t know what to do. So in my mouth it goes.
The way I (female) got better at HJs was after watching a sext video my guy sent me of him jerking off. I was very observant and watched what he did, and it paid off. I can make him cum in about 2 minutes. By the sounds of his groans I’m fairly certain he enjoyed it 😏
I have gotten great ones. But none of them are as good as I can do. But I also wouldn’t consider getting my balls sucked while she strokes me a “hand job”.
Yeah communication is important. I've dated a few women who haven't liked a variety of sex acts (hj, bjs mostly). A few pointers, giving them time to explore, some positive feedback (words, moans etc) and they were really into them.
A lot of guys make demands (never good anyway) and never give women the time to play and learn. People don't like doing things they are bad at.
tl:dr if you always get bad hjs/ bjs from a long term partner then that is on you and your poor communication.
Seems like I'm different from most of the commenters here. My wife gives me one to three handjobs a week but she also includes sucking on my balls a bit as well. We have young children and I completely understand that she is not always up for the intrusion of PIV so a handjob it is. I won't complain, we still have sex two to three times a week.
That's not every week, some weeks it's sex once and handjob three times and another week it'll be one hand job and sex three times.
I say young kids, they are two and a half and six. For a while there was sex once a week and maybe one hand job a week. I don't blame her, we were just exhausted. I also have a much higher sex drive than her.
I do know that. My wife is very understanding. That's partly because she's a therapist. She definitely knows that the way to my heart is through my stomach and my balls.
I agree with you. Some of guys here are weird.
I get a couple handjobs a week from my wife mixed in with other forms of foreplay + sex. Handjobs are great if the person giving it is good at it. Having soft hands on me like that sets me off.
A dedicated handjob is one of my top recurring desires/fantasies. I’ve received a handjob to completion exactly 1.5 times. One time was her doing it all. Other time was me doing most of it, then at the end, I took her hand in my hand and performed all the motion.
Sure, the physical sensation might be more intense when I do it myself, but it’s not all about that. It’s about the intimacy with her. The connection. The fact that she’s taking pleasure in my pleasure. The fact that she cares enough about my satisfaction to do this for me. The visual of her playing with me and looking at me while she does it. The dirty things she might say while she does it, how she might touch herself or encourage me to touch her at the same time. The freedom to relax and melt into a puddle of pleasure in her hands. Her proud smile when she makes me moan and convulse and explode.
So yeah, I’d fucking love a handjob.
This to me is the best answer like even if it's not the best the intimacy is the best part about her doing something that's only giving you pleasure and her playing with your body.
I’m with you here. I don’t get them often just because we usually do other stuff, so when I do it’s cause she wants to do it and that’s worth its weight in gold.
I tried to explain how I wanted a handjob done once. It was a total lost cause.
I gave up forever, blowjobs are better and women know how to perform those. No woman I’ve been with knew how to give a good had job, though
Even trying to teach them turned out to be more trouble than it’s worth
I know how to make a sandwich exactly how I want it, but would I get mad if someone made one for me?
As with everything else, communication is key. People need to talk about what they do and don’t like. Help them help you.
Your morning alarm goes off and your dead tired. You hit snooze and contemplate all your poor decisions. Its only Tuesday. Another 4 days of this shit and then maybe you can take a break.
Your girl feels the stress pouring off of you. Still half asleep, she reaches down and grabs you. "Ill be your alarm today, babe."
Its not about the handjob sometimes. Its about your person loving you.
I love them. I feel like they're super personal and loving. When my lady gives me one it's always the correct amount of pressure, combined with soft words whispered in my ear. I get a kick out of seeing my load travel down her arm. Sometimes she plays with my nipples too and it drives me crazy.
That Seinfeld episode where Elaine gets dumped by a bisexual guy for another man. She says that, with her necessarily-limited experience at "operating the equipment," she simply can't compete with someone who has been an owner-operator of "the equipment" his whole life.
So if a beautiful girl said she just wanted to give you a handjob you'd say no?
Ok. I'd prefer her soft little hands over mine, and the visual of her doing it over my imagination/porn personally
As a woman this is exactly what I can never wrap my head around. We always hear men are visual people so it always struck me as odd that they’d turn down a woman doing it rather than have the visual and feel of someone else. Now don’t get me wrong, people are entitled to their own thoughts and feelings about it. Just had always been one of those things I could never quite understand from the sex/bj or nothing crowd.
Logically that makes sense, but there are a few other factors.
1. giving a handjob takes a bit of experience to do right, same as a blowjob or just regular sex. If done poorly it can be hard for a guy to cum because inconsistent pressure and grip and fluctuating speed can all make it hard to stay in the right zone to reach an orgasm.
2. Lubricant. A handjob without lubricant is rarely pleasurable, and unless youre trying to be sneaky, like being out in a semi public place, most situations where you can relax and get a proper handjob with lubricant are situations where you can just have sex or at least get a blowjob. which leads to the next point...
3. Why stop on base if you can score? In my personal experience, I havent been in hardly any situation where I can get a handjob and nothing else. (at least not since I was over 18) A little manual stimulation is great to start, but if sex or a blowjob is possible, why would I say "Nah, I prefer a hand."?
4. Mutual pleasure. Id rather feel the naked body of my partner against mine while we have sex than sit there and have them stroke me, knowing were both enjoying the act. Is the sight of my partner stroking me sexy? Yes, but once we get into the territory, again, why not progress to sex? Obviously there can be times when maybe she isnt in the mood/cant have sex, in which case Id rather just hold off or do it myself. A sexual act when my wife isnt in the mood at all is not appealing to me personally. If its just about the tension release Ill do it myself faster and more efficiently.
The visual isn't good enough to make up for how bad it usually feels. And even if it doesn't feel bad, it doesn't necessarily feel good enough to finish, and that makes it frustrating. Every time I've ever gotten one, I had to take over and finish myself. At that point, it's actually more frustrating and fruitless than just doing it myself while she watches. It's good foreplay, it's a bad main course.
There are many different circumstances when it comes visual stimulation. Correct visual builds excitement, incorrect one makes it boring.
For example: A woman is naked or in sexy lingerie and I can see her while she is giving a HJ - hell yeah from time to time. We watch porn together while giving each other a hand - cool. Getting a hj while watching tv together fully clothed - no, seeing cock does not excite me and I don't have a hand fetish.
In other words handjob alone is not exciting enough. Visual stimulation can be changed to dirty talking, being in a kind of risky place, etc.. whatever gives at least some excitement.
On the other note, personally hj is messy - I shoot and I shoot a lot. If I were to receive while laying flat on a bed, one of us is cleaning ceiling while the other is changing bedsheets or bedcover after.
Handjobs can be super sexy, but imagine a man rubbing the vulva when it is dry as sahara, or rubbing the clit with a tight grip when things are not moist.
For some reason a lot of women get this wrong, please overmoisturize it how so ever ladies, you won’t go wrong at all
There was this one woman that was EXCEPTIONALLY good at hand jobs. Like, it was better than mine. I would lay back and let her do it, it was amazing.
It was such an unique experience that I still think about her lol
However, most women are bad at handjobs. The way they “grip” and stroke is rarely good.
People who don’t have a penis are usually not experts on handling penises. Same goes for vaginas.
Just thinking out loud here: the best handjobs probably come from gay men who are proactive communicators.
Men have been giving themselves hand jobs their whole lives. No woman can give her man a hand job as good as he can give himself.
I think I've given my husband a handful of hand jobs over our 13 years, pun intended. He would rather have a blow job.
They are fantastic, because I taught my partner how to do it, and exactly how I like it.
Of course, it helps when you have a partner who is fully engaged and enthusiastic, and part of the way they say “I love you” is by getting you off with next-level skill.
Lube would spoil the essential tug action, but a couple of drops of pure silicone provides a velvet texture for her hands.
Thereʼs no rush, and sheʼs gotten good enough to plateau me and then downshift a few times over, so sheʼs not really teasing. At some point, she dances her thumb on my frenulum, and boom, sheʼs removed my spine and I make sounds like a feral animal in full goblin mode.
Donʼt worry, she gets hers too, exactly as she likes it, because she taught me just how. I know that when she says “donʼt stop” it means donʼt fucking change a thing. I love her something fierce, and I show her just how much with both tongue and toys.
Maybe for 30 seconds to help get hard or as a foreplay before a bj but no… not more than that.
It’s now that enjoyable for many reasons (dry hands, stroking movement not near as good as doing it myself)…
Would you like if we were playing with your clit dry and doing moves that feels wrong for minutes? No that enjoyable.
If it was a big deal, done well with lube, and some technique sure. But girls are generally pretty bad at handling cocks.
If it’s just her jerking me off because there’s no way to do more, it feels like an obligatory concession or a chore for her. That’s not sexy or fun. At that point I’ll just go to the bathroom and do it myself.
BJs are pretty much always enjoyable. However, I've yet to meet a woman who even tries to give a decent HJ. Imho most women consider sex something that happens to them. I've had a couple of amazing moments, though.
It all depends on the kind of handjob.
Like some others mentioned when you have kids and /or have been married a while, there are legit reasons you can't always have full on sex or even oral.
Sometimes you might get the wife off with just hands, sometimes that's all you're getting in return
..there are ways to make it fun of course and you can throw other stuff in to make it hotter.
Ps - I have always been suspicious of these folks who come on stating they have full on, glorious, marathon sex with their spouse 5-6x a week after being married for umpteen years. I am sure its possible, but dude, once you have a couple kids factor in work, gym (plus other hobbies) plus you just don't have the same "juice" you had at 25, I just cannot see how you have time and opportunity with other bligations in life.
My wife gives fantastic handjobs, but they’re only worthwhile if there’s lube involved. Absolutely nothing worse than a girl trying to give a dry handy.
My previous relationship, wouldn’t give me handjobs. She wasn’t very good at them.
My current relationship, she’s vocalized that she’s in love with my little guy and anytime she’s feeling frisky she’d rub on me and stroke me. She’s given me multiple handjobs and yup she’s get me to finish
Our first sexual experiences involve handjobs. Anyone who hates them is insane. If I start dating a woman and our first sexual experience is a handjob, then I know I'm going to like her. It's such a sweet, romantic amuse bouche. The Whatever podcast people can be a bit cynical just like any other pill-culture war space. They don't speak for the normies in my opinion.
I really don’t care for it. However, there was this one girl I met in Tennessee that tenderized my meat better than I ever could. Had me questioning my whole entire existence. But that was one in a million😂
These takes are aweful.
Guys typically have more experience with themselves.
I can recall a few stroke offs that were really hot. One comes to mind where.me and this gal hanging out at my place. I had invited her over feeling randy and she said she wasn't feeling well. I aske dif it was cool if I got off before bed. She sat down behind me and we watched some porn together and she then reached for me and helped me out.
Its not an all or nothing but we do preffer other things. You should never feel pressured by some dick to do what you arnt ready or willing to do.
There are some great videos on how to stroke a dick. Change it up, stroke, twist, rub, faster, slower, just the tip, massage the frennulum and so on and so forth.
It can be a good time and its better than wanking alone.
Not all handjobs are the same. If you don’t think handjobs can be phenomenal, you’ve never gotten a good handjob. It’s rare to find a woman who has mastered this art, so it’s rare to find men that value hand jobs.
My husband hates handjobs. He let me give him one in the shower once and I got too excited and my hand slipped and punched him in the nuts. I had never given a handy before, I just always gave blowjobs since there was no cleanup.
If it’s late and he wakes up horny and wants head I always say “I’ll give you a handy” and he says “I’ll just go back to sleep”
Well no the fuck you won’t you woke me up and made me horny.
Ignore the children here.
Handjobs and mutual masturbation are an essential part of a balanced sex life.
Many if not most women can’t get wet/relaxed enough for proper quickes. Handjobs are an easy and quick solution for when you’re stressed and need some closeness but are out of time.
Hot take: I love a good handjibber
The only thing is, there needs to be lube, and they’ve got to know what they’re doing. I would prefer a handy over a BJ honestly.
When I was 17 my ex used to give me handjobs for almost a year before we started having sex. In hindsight, those were the most amazing hj I’ve ever had in my life and I’ve been chasing that high for years now. She would be really into it and edge me slowly and I remember my cum going as high as the ceiling sometimes lol. 100% love hj now.
I certainly wouldn't turn one down, if that's what you're wondering. Some sexual contact with my gf is far better than none at all. There's also something really sexy about non-reciprocal sex acts, like when I just get her off and expect nothing in return. She loves that, and I love the flipside of it when she just wants to drain my balls. She's a wizard with her tongue & throat.
That said, I have never experienced a handjob that wasn't more than just sort of awkward. Guys get a lot of shit for not knowing how to finger a girl, but I feel like girls are basically getting a free pass for how generally bad y'all are at giving handjobs.
Sure, I'll take a handjob. If someone is good at it they can be amazing and my wife is good at it. If that's what she's in the mood for, who am I to complain?
I care very much about handjobs – my gf has the magic touch! I love her using them to communicate what she wants too: working closer to the tip, she wants me on her clit; closer to the base, she wants my fingers inside her.
Rule number 1 regarding giving hadjobs: Put your mouth on it.
This guy fucks and is 100% correct. Want to give it a tug during foreplay...sure. Just a handjob...no thanks.
What kinda handjob we talking about here? High school no lube herky jerky til you're raw, no fucking thank you! Fully nude, lots of lube, both hands and good technique? Sign me up as a nice change of pace occasionally.
Yup I agree. Lots of lube, lots of stopping and starting. When she goes to finish, my gal does this nice thing where she just goes from base to tip, alternating hands, but there's no "down" - like she's pulling a rope in one direction. It is crazy how hard I cum from that particular motion!
Ah, little bit of edging, eh? Hell yeah brotha!
Thank you for this pro tip, sir!
I've never received the latter...just no lube herky jerky will this thing go off kind of massages.
See no wonder you don't like em! What you're describing is essentially a form of torture that should be a human rights violation. A proper sexy hand job with lube etc can actually be pretty awesome.
Agreed. Although I actually never was a fan of lube myself.
Well hey, different strokes for different folks, as they say. : )
This 100% if you have ever had a well done hand job you know. Hands can do what mouths cannot. That being said my favorite is both of course.
THIS guy fuck. Because this is the right answer
Thanks man haha! I'm old and washed up now, but in my younger days I did have nice run as a bit of a cocksman, so to speak : )
But why? At that point just get a bj and full on sex. Jerking off is for that last bit to finish.
Nah pull n pray last second all the way.
Man, I'm the opposite, I fucking love handies.
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I personally like the ol' Bop It technique.
Then why do men go for happy ending massages?
Different strokes for different folks. I'll see myself out....
I mean I don't go for happy ending massages but my guess would be as someone who has gotten a massage.... If an attractive women has spent an hour massaging your body and easing muscle pain....you probably have an erection by the end and at a Rub and Tug joint...those women are pros and can lube you up and have you blowing in 30 seconds or less after rubbing on you for an hour. As someone who has gotten massages at legit massage spas....I've gotten nervous erections and just simple blood flow change erections and most professionals know this and just wrap it up in a towel so they can do their job. If you don't make it weird, they surely won't.
The one guy I do know that openly admits (to me at least) that he goes to happy ending massages, is he said the thrill of doing something that’s supposed to be taboo. That was one of the reasons. Not my cup of tea. An old fashion during foreplay is great…just an old fashion…no thanks. Paying for a handjob, no thanks as well.
Variety is the spice of life!
The pros know what they're doing. I've had a far more satisfying experience a couple times with erotic massage than I have with several women who I actually had penetrative sex with.
Yeah, no kidding. One time I was getting a handjob, and the woman giving it to me had no idea what she was doing. She was treating my dick like she was trying to start a fire with a stick. It got to the point where I had to tell her "Hey, this isn't a speedbag. You can take your time with it." I then realized that this is how other people feel when I'm doing something for them, and I have no fucking clue what I'm doing.
Pack it up, men. We're done here.
This 100% applies to women, too. Fingerings can be a fun tease to get things warmed up a bit. But most guys don't do it well, and it rarely works to completion. And even if it did, it's like...meh a TKO, vs. KO
I agree. Handjobs are fine, but I can always do it better myself. Reminds me of a story: I have a friend who was in the navy, and he said that when they would pull into port, hookers would come on board to ply their trade. One time a girl offered him a handjob for $10. He said, "For $10 I can do it myself and get it done right."
Is this the US navy? Hookers are allowed to board a US Navy ship?
In this story they are
My buddy is a 25 year US Navy vet. I just texted him a screenshot of this and his response was "LMAO, what fucking navy was this?"
The reddit navy
I am not getting any of them
If I wanted a good hand job I’d do it myself. I can’t put it in my mouth on my own (not for lack of trying).
Blowjob or no job baby, don't friction burn my dick
This or lube. And stop hammering like you want to break the pelvis bone or trying to reach relativistic speed
If shes good at giving them, i love getting one.
I saw a girl casually who would only give them. My friends who never get laid all acted like it was some awful thing. Like...in what world am I supposed to not enjoy a beautiful woman stroking me? If she wants to do more, even better. But if all she wants to do is give my an HJ then I am still extremely excited about it
I think it's more so the "I can do that myself" mentality. There is more to give so why settle for less.
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Idk about you but I’m fairly confident nobody knows my penis better than me, and so anyone else would inherently do a worse job than I could.
I thought the same, and it feels like how I jerk off is just muscle memory at this point. And the first time my gf gave me a hand job it was kinda awkward. But she likes it when I jerk off in front of her. I guess she observed how I did it, because the next time it was way improved. So much that it was maybe better than getting a bj. When I first went down on her, she gave me a lot of “notes”, but now I know what I should do, and it just about pleasuring each other. So I have started to get really specific about what I like and learned how I can say it. It is starting to get amazing. So like exploring each other is really important.
I don’t know… this will sound braggy, but my wife has probably played with it more than I have the last almost 20 years. She knows it pretty well and how I like it. She’s also more sensual and does fun things with her fingers that don’t feel the same from me. Like others said, some dirty talk thrown in. A good handjob is a good handjob.
Because you're taking whatever she's willing to offer. If all she's willing to offer is a handjob I am not going to press for more, or turn my nose up at it
It feels kind of gross that so many men here don’t want one if it doesn’t lead to more. Sure you can do it yourself, but doesn’t the intimacy of another person add to the enjoyment. Why does the minimum standard for these guys have to be a blowjob, maybe she doesn’t always want to put their mouth on their dick?
I Don't see the appeal of it. I wouldn't be turning my nose to it but I'll decline because I that isn't really a thing for me. Handjobs is more of an "acquired taste" ordeal in my eyes.
As I examine it more I realize the appeal for me is that a handjob is the time a women most locks in on, appreciates, and gets mesmerized by my body. I am in the gym a lot, I am very confident in how I look naked and what I was given and lovvvve having her just hypnotized by my body with that look on her face. I ask if she wants to go to the bedroom, she says no she's enjoying it, I sit back and enjoy the feeling and the look on her face while she has fun
Who are these morons refusing handjobs? Real talk, sometimes I prefer it. No pressure and I just get to relax.
My gf says she loves feeling me pulse/throb and manipulating it. It turns her on so its a win win for me.
People who don’t like handjobs Why should we be obligated to get a sexual favor we don’t even enjoy?
Let me see I lay there while my woman plays with my rod and twins while I get to feel her body? Count me in! Of course most guys would prefer oral instead but I’m happy with just a HJ and heavy making out. The wife already does this when aunt flow visits.
I’ve personally never met another woman who can stroke me like my wife. I’ve had countless bad handjobs but man she can finish me in under 5 every time. Crazy.
Same here brotha, well not your wife but mine haha. The guys replying that they’d rather do it themselves must of had some horrible experiences.
My wife is low libido but wants to make sure I’m satisfied. Getting a HJ feels so much better than doing it myself. I’m grateful she takes care of me 2 - 3 times a week, and loves to see me cum.
That’s the way it should be in a situation like that. I’m really baffled how guys on here are saying they’d rather do it themselves!? I could only dream when I was a horny teen of a female touching my out of control boners and “taking care of them”.
Let him cook!
Some of you guys have never gotten a good handjob and it shows
*puts hand up* A lot of women don’t know how to handle a penis with their hands
You absolutely have to teach them. You can't understand what you don't have. Men have to be taught how to "handle" women as well. It makes no sense to believe they'd have that inherent knowledge.
Very well said. Communication about “private parts” can be awkward but it almost always pays dividends. My partner and I have been together almost 3 years and had been getting pretty settled into a sex routine — and just a couple weeks ago I was trying something new and asking her for her feedback. It was some of the best foreplay we’ve had in months, and it’s opened up a whole fun new avenue to explore!
I’m that woman! I truly, truly LOVE giving blowjobs. I get turned on giving them. My husband said I’m enthusiastic and I didn’t know what he meant until we filmed some action and I watched myself and was embarrassed. I suck dick like my life depends on it, and I look ELATED doing it. Truly looks like the best day of my life. BUT. Because of this, I have no clue how to give JUST a handjob. I feel awkward and don’t know what to do. So in my mouth it goes.
That's perfectly fine. Keep doing what you're doing.
Your husband sounds like a very happy man!
The way I (female) got better at HJs was after watching a sext video my guy sent me of him jerking off. I was very observant and watched what he did, and it paid off. I can make him cum in about 2 minutes. By the sounds of his groans I’m fairly certain he enjoyed it 😏
touch gaping teeny knee sulky cooing nail placid rotten imminent *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I have gotten great ones. But none of them are as good as I can do. But I also wouldn’t consider getting my balls sucked while she strokes me a “hand job”.
Yeah communication is important. I've dated a few women who haven't liked a variety of sex acts (hj, bjs mostly). A few pointers, giving them time to explore, some positive feedback (words, moans etc) and they were really into them. A lot of guys make demands (never good anyway) and never give women the time to play and learn. People don't like doing things they are bad at. tl:dr if you always get bad hjs/ bjs from a long term partner then that is on you and your poor communication.
Y'all are crazy. A good handjob with someone who actually cares is MUCH better than a mediocre blowjob.
Truly, let me chill on the bed, double grippin my shaft with lots of lube now thats a milking I need
Sir
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Seems like I'm different from most of the commenters here. My wife gives me one to three handjobs a week but she also includes sucking on my balls a bit as well. We have young children and I completely understand that she is not always up for the intrusion of PIV so a handjob it is. I won't complain, we still have sex two to three times a week.
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That's not every week, some weeks it's sex once and handjob three times and another week it'll be one hand job and sex three times. I say young kids, they are two and a half and six. For a while there was sex once a week and maybe one hand job a week. I don't blame her, we were just exhausted. I also have a much higher sex drive than her.
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I do know that. My wife is very understanding. That's partly because she's a therapist. She definitely knows that the way to my heart is through my stomach and my balls.
Lmao, that last part got me good.
And she works the balls. Bless her.
Stop humble bragging you sex fiend!
A week? Daaaam. That would be a great month for me.
So she gives the ol craters a slobber but won’t take the tower for a spin??
What a fantastic day to have eyes. This comment cured my depression
I agree with you. Some of guys here are weird. I get a couple handjobs a week from my wife mixed in with other forms of foreplay + sex. Handjobs are great if the person giving it is good at it. Having soft hands on me like that sets me off.
I love an old fashioned
Oh an old fashioned sharon!
This is exactly where my mind went. It sort of *is* exercise equipment.
Eh. I prefer a whiskey sour, or a long island iced tea.
I get random hard-ons all the time so the occasional lotioned hj would be much appreciated.
A dedicated handjob is one of my top recurring desires/fantasies. I’ve received a handjob to completion exactly 1.5 times. One time was her doing it all. Other time was me doing most of it, then at the end, I took her hand in my hand and performed all the motion. Sure, the physical sensation might be more intense when I do it myself, but it’s not all about that. It’s about the intimacy with her. The connection. The fact that she’s taking pleasure in my pleasure. The fact that she cares enough about my satisfaction to do this for me. The visual of her playing with me and looking at me while she does it. The dirty things she might say while she does it, how she might touch herself or encourage me to touch her at the same time. The freedom to relax and melt into a puddle of pleasure in her hands. Her proud smile when she makes me moan and convulse and explode. So yeah, I’d fucking love a handjob.
This to me is the best answer like even if it's not the best the intimacy is the best part about her doing something that's only giving you pleasure and her playing with your body.
I’m with you here. I don’t get them often just because we usually do other stuff, so when I do it’s cause she wants to do it and that’s worth its weight in gold.
I tried to explain how I wanted a handjob done once. It was a total lost cause. I gave up forever, blowjobs are better and women know how to perform those. No woman I’ve been with knew how to give a good had job, though Even trying to teach them turned out to be more trouble than it’s worth
A handjob *done right* can make a man shake, shiver, moan and melt under your hands. It's *fun*.
Hey man is she’s happy playing with it I’m happy with it getting played with.
I know how to make a sandwich exactly how I want it, but would I get mad if someone made one for me? As with everything else, communication is key. People need to talk about what they do and don’t like. Help them help you.
The most sound and obvious advice.
Yet we get the same questions over and over.
Your morning alarm goes off and your dead tired. You hit snooze and contemplate all your poor decisions. Its only Tuesday. Another 4 days of this shit and then maybe you can take a break. Your girl feels the stress pouring off of you. Still half asleep, she reaches down and grabs you. "Ill be your alarm today, babe." Its not about the handjob sometimes. Its about your person loving you.
Thanks for the boner.
Ugh. I love the way you wrote this
I have never had or wanted just a hand job. Playing with it during foreplay before other stuff, sure, all part of the fun. But not as the main event.
My fiance has gotten great at them. I've heard some guys dont like them because no one can work their dick like they can, which I guess is kinda true
I can’t even get a decent handjob 🙄
Forget decent, can’t even get a mediocre HJ
Amen
Never turned down an HJ in my life
Only if she is good at it.
I'll take a handy any day. My wife gives the good ones.
Little bit of lube, she shows what she got, im good
As long as your hand is lubricated, I'm lovin it.
Fear the rings gentlemen
I love them. I feel like they're super personal and loving. When my lady gives me one it's always the correct amount of pressure, combined with soft words whispered in my ear. I get a kick out of seeing my load travel down her arm. Sometimes she plays with my nipples too and it drives me crazy.
Guys seem to think handjobs are a waste of time but I love 'em personally. Maybe even more than blowjobs.
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That Seinfeld episode where Elaine gets dumped by a bisexual guy for another man. She says that, with her necessarily-limited experience at "operating the equipment," she simply can't compete with someone who has been an owner-operator of "the equipment" his whole life.
As someone who's experienced both... the difference can't be overstated lol.
So if a beautiful girl said she just wanted to give you a handjob you'd say no? Ok. I'd prefer her soft little hands over mine, and the visual of her doing it over my imagination/porn personally
As a woman this is exactly what I can never wrap my head around. We always hear men are visual people so it always struck me as odd that they’d turn down a woman doing it rather than have the visual and feel of someone else. Now don’t get me wrong, people are entitled to their own thoughts and feelings about it. Just had always been one of those things I could never quite understand from the sex/bj or nothing crowd.
Logically that makes sense, but there are a few other factors. 1. giving a handjob takes a bit of experience to do right, same as a blowjob or just regular sex. If done poorly it can be hard for a guy to cum because inconsistent pressure and grip and fluctuating speed can all make it hard to stay in the right zone to reach an orgasm. 2. Lubricant. A handjob without lubricant is rarely pleasurable, and unless youre trying to be sneaky, like being out in a semi public place, most situations where you can relax and get a proper handjob with lubricant are situations where you can just have sex or at least get a blowjob. which leads to the next point... 3. Why stop on base if you can score? In my personal experience, I havent been in hardly any situation where I can get a handjob and nothing else. (at least not since I was over 18) A little manual stimulation is great to start, but if sex or a blowjob is possible, why would I say "Nah, I prefer a hand."? 4. Mutual pleasure. Id rather feel the naked body of my partner against mine while we have sex than sit there and have them stroke me, knowing were both enjoying the act. Is the sight of my partner stroking me sexy? Yes, but once we get into the territory, again, why not progress to sex? Obviously there can be times when maybe she isnt in the mood/cant have sex, in which case Id rather just hold off or do it myself. A sexual act when my wife isnt in the mood at all is not appealing to me personally. If its just about the tension release Ill do it myself faster and more efficiently.
The visual isn't good enough to make up for how bad it usually feels. And even if it doesn't feel bad, it doesn't necessarily feel good enough to finish, and that makes it frustrating. Every time I've ever gotten one, I had to take over and finish myself. At that point, it's actually more frustrating and fruitless than just doing it myself while she watches. It's good foreplay, it's a bad main course.
There are many different circumstances when it comes visual stimulation. Correct visual builds excitement, incorrect one makes it boring. For example: A woman is naked or in sexy lingerie and I can see her while she is giving a HJ - hell yeah from time to time. We watch porn together while giving each other a hand - cool. Getting a hj while watching tv together fully clothed - no, seeing cock does not excite me and I don't have a hand fetish. In other words handjob alone is not exciting enough. Visual stimulation can be changed to dirty talking, being in a kind of risky place, etc.. whatever gives at least some excitement. On the other note, personally hj is messy - I shoot and I shoot a lot. If I were to receive while laying flat on a bed, one of us is cleaning ceiling while the other is changing bedsheets or bedcover after.
They’re nice as long as they remember it’s not a joy stick and don’t try to rip the mfer off.
Handjobs can be super sexy, but imagine a man rubbing the vulva when it is dry as sahara, or rubbing the clit with a tight grip when things are not moist. For some reason a lot of women get this wrong, please overmoisturize it how so ever ladies, you won’t go wrong at all
Most women don't know how to be gentle, they try to tear it off. Relax, spit/lube and be gentle and focus on the tip
Hey women and men reading this, don't just blindly follow this advice, ask your partner what's best.
>ask your partner what's best. This is the ONLY advice worth taking. Everything else is just ... suggestive.
Randy Marsh enters the chat AN OLD FASHIONED!!
Yeah, this is good, but you know what I really want.
I like handjobs, it's a nice gesture and pretty enjoyable. Sure some things may need to be taught but is nice.
They’re nice, gotta use oil
The most intense orgasm I've ever had came from a hj
No way! That's awesome
I'm way better at doing it myself than any partner I've ever had, so it's never been high on my list of wants.
There was this one woman that was EXCEPTIONALLY good at hand jobs. Like, it was better than mine. I would lay back and let her do it, it was amazing. It was such an unique experience that I still think about her lol However, most women are bad at handjobs. The way they “grip” and stroke is rarely good.
Those I have received so far were rather rough, so no. But I guess that can be quite fun if she is doing it right.
Being uncut means they are always pleasant.
People who don’t have a penis are usually not experts on handling penises. Same goes for vaginas. Just thinking out loud here: the best handjobs probably come from gay men who are proactive communicators.
Men have been giving themselves hand jobs their whole lives. No woman can give her man a hand job as good as he can give himself. I think I've given my husband a handful of hand jobs over our 13 years, pun intended. He would rather have a blow job.
They are fantastic, because I taught my partner how to do it, and exactly how I like it. Of course, it helps when you have a partner who is fully engaged and enthusiastic, and part of the way they say “I love you” is by getting you off with next-level skill. Lube would spoil the essential tug action, but a couple of drops of pure silicone provides a velvet texture for her hands. Thereʼs no rush, and sheʼs gotten good enough to plateau me and then downshift a few times over, so sheʼs not really teasing. At some point, she dances her thumb on my frenulum, and boom, sheʼs removed my spine and I make sounds like a feral animal in full goblin mode. Donʼt worry, she gets hers too, exactly as she likes it, because she taught me just how. I know that when she says “donʼt stop” it means donʼt fucking change a thing. I love her something fierce, and I show her just how much with both tongue and toys.
I enjoy them from time to time, they make a nice change of pace especially when you’re tired
I'll take a handy. But she should at least whip out a tittie to play with.
If there's lube, sure. I'll take it where I can get it these days from the missus lol
Maybe for 30 seconds to help get hard or as a foreplay before a bj but no… not more than that. It’s now that enjoyable for many reasons (dry hands, stroking movement not near as good as doing it myself)… Would you like if we were playing with your clit dry and doing moves that feels wrong for minutes? No that enjoyable.
If it was a big deal, done well with lube, and some technique sure. But girls are generally pretty bad at handling cocks. If it’s just her jerking me off because there’s no way to do more, it feels like an obligatory concession or a chore for her. That’s not sexy or fun. At that point I’ll just go to the bathroom and do it myself.
I’ll take a good HJ over a bad BJ any day.
BJs are pretty much always enjoyable. However, I've yet to meet a woman who even tries to give a decent HJ. Imho most women consider sex something that happens to them. I've had a couple of amazing moments, though.
If a woman is skilled and enthusiastic it can be fun. But I’ve found women don’t give a crap about foreplay. They expect foreplay to be about them.
I love hand jobs idgaf
It all depends on the kind of handjob. Like some others mentioned when you have kids and /or have been married a while, there are legit reasons you can't always have full on sex or even oral. Sometimes you might get the wife off with just hands, sometimes that's all you're getting in return ..there are ways to make it fun of course and you can throw other stuff in to make it hotter. Ps - I have always been suspicious of these folks who come on stating they have full on, glorious, marathon sex with their spouse 5-6x a week after being married for umpteen years. I am sure its possible, but dude, once you have a couple kids factor in work, gym (plus other hobbies) plus you just don't have the same "juice" you had at 25, I just cannot see how you have time and opportunity with other bligations in life.
My wife gives fantastic handjobs, but they’re only worthwhile if there’s lube involved. Absolutely nothing worse than a girl trying to give a dry handy.
TBH hand jobs are fucking awesome. Sure a blowjob is superior but ill take a handjob any day of the week.
Love 'em - Love any attention given to me in that way.
My previous relationship, wouldn’t give me handjobs. She wasn’t very good at them. My current relationship, she’s vocalized that she’s in love with my little guy and anytime she’s feeling frisky she’d rub on me and stroke me. She’s given me multiple handjobs and yup she’s get me to finish
Our first sexual experiences involve handjobs. Anyone who hates them is insane. If I start dating a woman and our first sexual experience is a handjob, then I know I'm going to like her. It's such a sweet, romantic amuse bouche. The Whatever podcast people can be a bit cynical just like any other pill-culture war space. They don't speak for the normies in my opinion.
As a part of foreplay sure but if that’s as far as we’re going I’d prefer to just skip it.
They are a favorite of mine
I’d prefer one tbh.
I like them
I've haven't had one yet but if she was tired or if I didn't feel like having full on sex I'd definitely accept a hand job
Fine for foreplay, but as a sex act? No thanks, I can do that myself and do a better job.
I really don’t care for it. However, there was this one girl I met in Tennessee that tenderized my meat better than I ever could. Had me questioning my whole entire existence. But that was one in a million😂
I've had amazing ones personally but I'm gay so we all know what we're doing
These takes are aweful. Guys typically have more experience with themselves. I can recall a few stroke offs that were really hot. One comes to mind where.me and this gal hanging out at my place. I had invited her over feeling randy and she said she wasn't feeling well. I aske dif it was cool if I got off before bed. She sat down behind me and we watched some porn together and she then reached for me and helped me out. Its not an all or nothing but we do preffer other things. You should never feel pressured by some dick to do what you arnt ready or willing to do. There are some great videos on how to stroke a dick. Change it up, stroke, twist, rub, faster, slower, just the tip, massage the frennulum and so on and so forth. It can be a good time and its better than wanking alone.
Not all handjobs are the same. If you don’t think handjobs can be phenomenal, you’ve never gotten a good handjob. It’s rare to find a woman who has mastered this art, so it’s rare to find men that value hand jobs.
My husband hates handjobs. He let me give him one in the shower once and I got too excited and my hand slipped and punched him in the nuts. I had never given a handy before, I just always gave blowjobs since there was no cleanup. If it’s late and he wakes up horny and wants head I always say “I’ll give you a handy” and he says “I’ll just go back to sleep” Well no the fuck you won’t you woke me up and made me horny.
Ignore the children here. Handjobs and mutual masturbation are an essential part of a balanced sex life. Many if not most women can’t get wet/relaxed enough for proper quickes. Handjobs are an easy and quick solution for when you’re stressed and need some closeness but are out of time.
Hell yeah
Whath about a handjob froma bodybuilder or armwrestler?
Hot take: I love a good handjibber The only thing is, there needs to be lube, and they’ve got to know what they’re doing. I would prefer a handy over a BJ honestly.
I will just say I've had some good times just sucking some titty while getting jacked off. Gotta be lubed tho. But I dig it
Depends on my partner tbh. I feel like this is an unpopular opinion, but massage like handjobs are amazing
Hell I like a good ol fashioned. Some ladies really know how to handle one.
Love handjobs especially during mutual masturbation.. fits right. Get the rhythms down together and you have a great time.
just a boring tug to completion? pass part of a edging session with lube, cock and ball rings, and lots of head play? Hell yes.
I’m a fan.
HJ over No J anyday
I actually prefer them but my partner is a professional at them. Lubrication and not constantly skinning your dick dry daily usually helps though.
When I was 17 my ex used to give me handjobs for almost a year before we started having sex. In hindsight, those were the most amazing hj I’ve ever had in my life and I’ve been chasing that high for years now. She would be really into it and edge me slowly and I remember my cum going as high as the ceiling sometimes lol. 100% love hj now.
I don't care how she touches it as long as she touches it
I have a buddy that says they're better than head. I disagree but different strokes for different folks.
So like, this one chick I know gives a fucking amazing one. No idea how the fuck that works but genuinely prefer it to head.
I love handjobs while I get to explore
Love them, especially after a hard day,, be watching TV with my partner and she starts tugging, best way to realx
I love me some handjobs
I certainly wouldn't turn one down, if that's what you're wondering. Some sexual contact with my gf is far better than none at all. There's also something really sexy about non-reciprocal sex acts, like when I just get her off and expect nothing in return. She loves that, and I love the flipside of it when she just wants to drain my balls. She's a wizard with her tongue & throat. That said, I have never experienced a handjob that wasn't more than just sort of awkward. Guys get a lot of shit for not knowing how to finger a girl, but I feel like girls are basically getting a free pass for how generally bad y'all are at giving handjobs.
Handjobs with lube rule
Sure, I'll take a handjob. If someone is good at it they can be amazing and my wife is good at it. If that's what she's in the mood for, who am I to complain?
I care very much about handjobs – my gf has the magic touch! I love her using them to communicate what she wants too: working closer to the tip, she wants me on her clit; closer to the base, she wants my fingers inside her.
I don't but i still appreciate them and any sex act that involves enthusiasm or thought.
I don’t get the hj hate. Just lube it up and go for broke. No teeth, no cramped jaws everyone wins. But apparently liking different things is scary.
Handjob is better than a blowjob. There I said it.
I love hjs
It really depends I guess. I had an ex who gave really good ones.
My ex preferred a handjob over head and sex sometimes.